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Ofir Matityahu | The Christian Reeve Podcast | #120 | · The Christian Reeve Podcast

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Hello and welcome to another episode of the Christian roof
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podcast. Today's guest is a recent high
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school graduate, all the way from Israel.
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My first guest from Israel, his name is Sofia matityahu, welcome
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to the show. Thanks for having me, man, I got
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it, I know that. There you go.
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There you go. I totally didn't ask a fear how
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to say that before anyway, let's jump straight into it.
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So, yeah, you've recently graduated Do nothing about the
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Israel, education system, how it works.
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I just want to really quickly ask you about that.
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It, do you have luck a structure similar to the international
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Baccalaureate? Or because, obviously, if you're
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graduating at 18, that's different from the UK.
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We finished high school at 16 and we have kind of two years
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between 16 to 18 that we sort of do.
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Basically a continuation of education, but for some reason,
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they decided to split it but most other countries in the
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world just go up to 18. But what's kind of the general
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structure in Israel as far as education is concerned.
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Okay. So um, from age, approximately
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seven until age, 12 is in first to see rate you're having
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Elementary School. Mmm, I forgot to mention its
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there is a structure of Art. And that's prior to school,
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that's kind of complicated first.
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There is the my own, which is a Hebrew word for pretty much like
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shelter, okay? I don't know how to translate
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it, but never mind which is 4 to 24 year-olds, and then you have
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what's called gun TomTom, Harbour, which is 3 Three
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mandatory kindergarten which is 4 4 to 5.
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Okay. Then you have drawn over which
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is pre mandatory 6 to 5 to 6, excuse me.
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And then you have a gun covid is 6 to 7 and then from 7 unused,
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you start school as yeah. Cool.
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It's kind of similar to a little bit to UK and America has posed
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in the sense that I know certain places in the UK in certain
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places in America tend to do like preschool kindergarten and
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then main scorns. It's kind of similar to that, I
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guess. Yeah, we're not really much.
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But in his world acts, I think was structured.
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Like, there's age groups even for Kindergartens, which is, I
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think great because kids need to learn how to socialize with
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their own age group. Instead of Instead of kids from
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mother ages because their interests are different, their,
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their physical and mental capabilities are different.
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Yeah, thirdly to come, obviously, you've just
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graduated. So, what your kind of like a
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media plans? Are you looking to maybe, maybe
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go to university, or is there a particular career path?
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You're looking to go into, like, where are you at with that?
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Let's not put the horse before the cart.
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I graduated from high school about half a year ago.
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Okay. Now I work as a dishwasher at
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hummus restaurant. And I wait to be volunteering
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into the military military services actually almost for
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everyone. It's mandatory but for me
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because they have some communication on this function
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as I've been diagnosed with. So I get, I was exempt but I
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said, so what? Like, I'm just like any other
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person. I have the same rights and have
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the same duties. So I decided to Volunteering to
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the military and I'm about to start my military service in
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around March or April 20 22 and what are your.
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So this is the Israel Defense Force.
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I found this in the information that you'd sent over to me.
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What? What?
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Actually prompted you to push that.
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I mean I know it's quite a divisive issue.
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Some people, you know, really, really want to do it and I want
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to serve the country and such other People are really against
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it, like, what prompted you to do that?
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Why did you want to push to do it so much?
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Because I want to give my country back.
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Although this country is full of division civil, unrest
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government ineptitude. It's still a good country to
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live in like we're not starving, we're not, we're not dying.
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So, I still want to give a little bit back to this country
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and also for me as a child with communicational dysfunctions, it
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gives us me and my mother a lot of sub city with treatments and
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therapy sessions and that kind of stuff.
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So, I really want to give back. And also, as I said, I believe
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although I'm diagnosed with this and that it doesn't mean I'm
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different. I mean maybe some of my
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mannerisms and characteristics and thought patterns might be
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different. You know what?
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I just said I have mild. Autism.
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I want to hide it behind that communicational.
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Dysfunctions thing, which I say to people that I really don't
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want them to know about But I think I'm not different from
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anyone else. Like maybe have a little harder
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time. Making eye contact.
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Maybe I have a little harder time in social situations, which
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I'm working on, but I'll do whatever it takes to, to make
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myself better at that and maybe working with people which the
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role I'm going to assume. It takes a lot of interaction
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with other people regarding receiving and giving information
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about the state of the Israeli Defense Forces which I think is
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going to happen. Have you because what you were
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saying there and your choice of wording as far as introducing
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that and everything kind of implies that you faced maybe a
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bit of discrimination so far for having that.
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So I don't know, I guess what I'm trying to say is generally,
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living in growing up in Israel. Have you faced sort of
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discrimination that having mild autism as it prevented you from
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doing things or all may be prevented you from getting
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opportunities? Unities or something like that.
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I mean I'm being mocked for some of my childhood.
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Like I've been a very mean. Unorthodox Lee behaving child.
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So kids noticed that citizen as you know kids are they don't
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have the filters that some adults have.
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Yeah. But for the most part, like I'm
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a regular living person, you know, I have my job, I have my
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Social Circle. I have my hobbies, I have my The
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things I like to do and I think I behave pretty much normally,
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so tying things together. Obviously, you're looking to
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kind of get various skills and sort of test yourself via
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joining the Israel Defense Force.
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You mentioned that you're doing working as a dishwasher in a
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restaurant. I also worked as a dishwasher at
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one point. Just fun fact.
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But what do you want to do? Like, what, what are you?
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I know you're passionate about music and we'll get to that.
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But what are you really wanting to do in and years from now?
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I know and I know it's difficult.
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I was 18 once, you know, so I know it's not easy to, you know,
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and they immediately know what you want but you must there must
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be something. You're really passionate about
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the you like that's what I want to do or I want to do this.
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I really think about being a therapist when I grow up.
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Because I really want to reach out to other people and really
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give them the tools to solve their own problems.
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And also, because I'm very empathetic person.
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I know there's a sentence in Hebrew that says, the baker
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shall not measure its own do, but I think I'm pretty damn
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intelligent. So I think I can give people
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another perspective on their problems and hence let them
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solve them. I like your confidence but it's
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good. It's good.
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More people need to have that I've said this sometimes in my
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live streams that I think a problem that we have a lot of
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the time certainly in the UK but also in other countries in
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general is this idea that you can't celebrate yourself where
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you can't say oh I am good at this thing or I have, you know,
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intelligence in this area. So why can't you say that?
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I mean people will say that you're not being modest, you're
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not being humble and it's like What's not like your turn around
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being like, I am the greatest that ever lived, but you're
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sick. It's okay to say, yeah, I have a
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talent for this. I think I have a proficiency for
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this because we all have different talents things that
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we're good at things that we're not so good at you know I can't
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lie. Celebrate that.
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Yeah. If it's bagged in reality and
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you don't do it too much and it's not like you're wants to
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intelligent 24/7. Oh yeah.
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Don't shove that into people's throats like You said it in the
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appropriate context and in a way that doesn't degrade the people
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around you that. Yeah, absolutely fine.
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And actually I still have issues with my confidence.
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I'm still pretty insecure, but I'm working on that and I'm
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trying to eliminate the cognitive biases.
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That make me think this way to tell you the truth and this is
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hit me talking to you because I've been in that situation.
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When I was growing up, I had zero Confidence, bad
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self-esteem, all of that stuff. And I'm not speaking for
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everyone, but I've learnt certainly in my 20s that I don't
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think it's ever something that you truly overcome completely.
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I think it's just something that you learn to get better at
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dealing with you. Learn to kind of go.
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Do you know what? Maybe it's going to be.
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Okay, maybe I am. Okay, maybe I am worth
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something, but you still doubt yourself, but you just can't
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listen to that doubt, you know, that's the key in my humble, I
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mean, you're absolutely right, it's not something you can
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eradicate it. Not, it's not binary code.
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You can't eradicate that. I mean, you can, you can live
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with that to the point where it doesn't disturb your everyday
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life. Like sometimes you're your cope
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with it. You'll deal with it especially
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when you hit lower points in your life, but I mean, when you
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jump on the trampoline and the surface goes down so you can go
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up. It's a great way of putting it.
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I love that. Okay, so you've got quite a few
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different goals and aims and such.
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As you as you mentioned, you're ready, you're practicing social
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skills. That's something I understand a
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little bit more context for why you're doing that all around.
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You know, I mean a lot of what I'm sort of mentioning here is
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stuff that you'd sent over to me that you know, things talking
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points Etc which are helpful. So thank you for that.
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But it all kind of fits this mold of you're trying to kind of
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Better yourself Body Spirit and soul kind of thing, all around.
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And some of the things I tapped into here that I found quite
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interesting. You'll learn to cook.
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So that's interesting. Tell us more about that.
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Actually, I'm trying to turn my mother.
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Listen, let me cook with you but she's like, oh, I don't have
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time for that but I don't have energy for that.
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You know. She would like something 5 a.m.
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I see their day job. Bob, it's like 9 to 10 hours per
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day and she doesn't have the energy to teach me and I tell,
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you know what? Just give me a written
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instructions and I'll cook and she's like, nah, nah, I don't
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want to deal with the consequences first.
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If I'm not a little more, I'll give what I want.
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Trust me. Right now.
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Most of what I cook is like hard-boiled eggs and omelets.
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Unfortunately I don't Can you see more?
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But if you but I can cook rice. I mean, that's also something we
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go. Hey, got start somewhere, right?
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And I imagine actually working in that restaurant will really
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help you because I remember, when I was a dishwasher, I was
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just washing dishes and like a local pub in my University and
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every now and again, they be like, oh hey can you prepare
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some salad for us? Or can you just quickly cook
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this thing, you know, it happens.
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You slowly find yourself and every job, I Kid.
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You not every job is like this you start as one thing and you
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end up doing like loads more time before you know it.
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You're like the manager and you're like, well, hold on, give
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me, give me the money. It's like, yeah, in football
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team for you. I mean, football is in the
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football, you actually feel with your feet like you maybe your
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Centre forward, but if the opponent has the ball in his
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feet, like you're trying to take it away from them.
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You don't care, like, oh, I'm centreford.
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I need to only score goals. No, you actually do whatever it
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takes to win. That's, that's a really good
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point actually. Yeah, I think especially, yeah,
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I'm not the biggest football fan of all time, but if one of my
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flatmates is a big football fan, and we were talking recently
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about sort of Ronaldo's Cristiano, Ronaldo shift from.
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So being a midfielder to being more of a sense of forward.
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And the reason for that is that he is A team focused player and
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he knows that his. He's going to be used best at
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this point in his career as a centre-forward.
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Whereas years ago he had then energy to run up and down the
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field and be defense Midfield attack.
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You know. But my point is that you know
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you're adjusting to that team Dynamic.
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What is needed in that situation and also accept in your
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limitations but also accentuating your strengths the
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same time. Exactly.
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Exactly. I mean I didn't cook anything
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yet. I mean the most I've made is
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like tea and coffee which is served alongside dessert.
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When the customers finished their meal, we give them some
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baklava, which is some kind of a minute.
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Sweet baked good. It's like a cookie with coffee,
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or tea, what they choose. So, I made some coffee and tea
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like, that's the most but I also I mean sometimes I mopped the
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floor, sometimes I take the empty plates and put them where
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knee in the sink. So yes, You see, you see, I'm
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gonna say this right, there is nothing wrong with doing,
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physical labor, physical jobs. I've done many jobs like this.
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I've worked as a waiter, but and I've stack shelves for a living
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and the supermarket, like, I don't think there's anything
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wrong with doing those types of jobs.
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And I think most people from what I understand, tend to start
16:08
in those jobs and then move on. Other things in that in their
16:11
life, you know, because those are the easiest jobs to get into
16:14
initially. But here's the thing, if you've
16:17
never worked in those kind of jobs, I can tell you now.
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It's a lot harder than you think.
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It might sound really easy, but imagine doing this stuff for
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like 12 hours a day. With, you know, you're supposed
16:29
to get a lunch break, but whether or not you get a lunch
16:32
break, that's another story. And then there's other
16:36
situations, like, like I remember one night when I was
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working as a waiter, Later, we would constantly have situations
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where, you know, be really busy. It's a summers day, that's like
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150 people on the really boiling hot Terrace managers
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disappeared. They're gone the way they are.
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So I'm essentially the manager, even though I didn't ask to be,
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or want to be, but people start coming to me like, oh, hey, what
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do we do? We do this.
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We need to do that and it's like, someone's got to take
17:05
charge of the situation. You're right.
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And also I just found myself. In these situations constantly
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and you just do your best, you just do your best to make the
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situation work, but you've got your everything, you've got to
17:17
deal with customer complaints, you've got to be good at
17:21
organizational skills. You've got to have the energy to
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do it, you know. And it's just there's so much to
17:27
contend with and when you come home you just physically and
17:29
mentally drained. It takes everything.
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I like all I do when I come back home sometimes it just yeah I
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find that last bit of metal. Energy to take a shower.
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All I do is either browse ready to play a game on my phone.
17:47
So the exercise you need like yeah, I've been there from a few
17:51
simple chords on my guitar. Like nothing more than that.
17:55
So let's talk about that you like music.
17:58
We can see a guitar there in the background guitar for you too.
18:03
Yes, I have how long, how long have?
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Yeah, I got guitars. I'm a musician as well.
18:08
How long have you been a musician?
18:09
What, what kind of music are you into?
18:12
Talk to us about that? I don't really regard myself as
18:15
a musician. Like I know Fury and I do
18:19
practice daily. But ok.
18:21
Ok, ok. Didi play an instrument.
18:25
Yes, I play the guitar, then you're a musician.
18:29
Okay? Yeah.
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I don't believe in this gatekeeping crap, but I don't
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think there's oh, well, you know, you need to have played
18:39
for five years and you need to have composed this many works
18:42
like know what he play music and you like music or musician, man.
18:46
Come on, I'll adopt that Mike's it.
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Anyway, I interrupted so small, so you're learning theory.
18:55
Your learnings no fury. Like, I know the names of the
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intervals you know, I know what a minor third is.
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I know what a perfect fifth is. I know to explain.
19:07
I know time signatures in a very Broad and vague way.
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And I noticed that you're into bands such as Lamb of God, and
19:17
heavy metal I presume. Since you're talking about time
19:19
signatures, you're probably aware of bands like Dream
19:22
Theater and such. Is that would that be right?
19:26
Hi princess. I listened to panic attack once,
19:30
but I didn't really listen to that much Dream Theater.
19:33
Like, okay, I mean they're not some band.
19:36
Yeah, listen wants to forsake in which is one of the most
19:40
mainstream and straightforward song.
19:42
Yeah, that's true. Yeah.
19:44
I'm more into that. Silly songs that have like 15
19:47
times signature changes? That Smith has more my thing.
19:53
See, there you go. There's another example.
19:58
Yeah. Don't tell us who you like
19:59
favorite bands to listen to or that you're inspired by?
20:04
That's about that. Yeah, there's no one band that
20:12
I'm really into, but I mean, probably Lamb of God Killswitch
20:17
Engage As I Lay Dying. That kind of stuff.
20:20
I really like that that, you know, that not, he's American
20:24
narrow, but I'm really open to anything and I think music is
20:29
pretty much an acquired taste like many things when I listen
20:32
to them first, I didn't like it as much as I was.
20:36
That's not for me maybe. But then I listen to it more and
20:39
more and started appreciating the nuances and maybe things
20:44
started to click for instance, in one song like the timing
20:48
sounds kinda off, but then I listened to it and understand
20:51
the timing is actually absolutely.
20:52
Right. It's exactly the same as with
20:56
the first time I listened to I think, possibly a Dream Theater
20:59
song unless I had on. Wait, what?
21:01
And then same thing happened about two seconds later.
21:04
It dropped it and it kind of made.
21:05
AdSense and I was like oh oh this is a thing this is just the
21:10
type of music I've never heard before.
21:12
Okay that is it Anyway. Okay well what can you tell us?
21:20
What's the heavy metal scene like in Israel or music?
21:23
See there's a pretty large heavy metal scene.
21:26
Actually I wanted to go a year ago a year and a half ago
21:31
actually to an Iron Maiden show but that got cancelled because
21:34
of covid. Yeah, and then, when they
21:37
actually did the toward the omitted, their Israel
21:40
performance, which I was really sad about because they're
21:43
legendary, I mean, Bruce's, vocal abilities is off the
21:49
charts. You can hit those notes and I
21:52
actually used to sing. So, I really know what I'm
21:57
talking about. Like, those high notes that it's
22:00
insane. Specially lower voice.
22:02
Like me. Yes.
22:04
How it's hard to do. To sing to that, that ability.
22:07
It's takes a lot of work for sure.
22:11
Okay. Let's get into some sort of
22:12
random questions about Israel in general.
22:16
Tell us some things about Israel that not everyone will know.
22:20
Oh I can I say that's a very tricky question.
22:27
Most Israeli people are pissed about living in Israel including
22:33
me and my family. They're pissed about living in
22:36
Israel, they complain non-stop. But sometimes only when they go
22:42
to actually third world countries like many many people,
22:46
after they finish their military, young people, the go
22:49
to either On South America or the forest, you know, India,
22:55
God, that kind of those kinds of places.
22:58
And then to understand what real poverty is not poverty.
23:02
In the sense of all, I can't afford a five bedroom apartment
23:06
and a trip to an a trip abroad twice, a year.
23:10
No, actual poverty. Like you have nothing to eat.
23:14
You barely have a house. And we need to actually have
23:19
some perspective. Of course prices are rising.
23:22
I'm not going to deny that it's packed in reality.
23:25
But still, most of us actually have food on the table.
23:29
This from where I'm from. Probably, if I go to another
23:32
neighborhood, you know the story.
23:37
What are some kind of for what would you say are the most
23:40
common misconceptions about Israel?
23:43
So I guess I'm coming at this from a western perspective but
23:48
they're what would you say? I like the misconceptions what
23:50
the things that people get wrong about Israel options, I mean one
23:59
misconception is that all Israeli people are rude and
24:04
arrogant and in lack etiquette which is not true.
24:09
Some Israeli, people have fantastic etiquette.
24:12
Like when I was in London, I quickly learned what is expected
24:18
of me, as, as a visitor and peppers operating and moving
24:23
around in space. I'm 22 letter to when I mount
24:30
the subway need to first. Let all the people off before I
24:33
go on. Yeah, escalator, I need to go to
24:38
the right hand side Yeah, I never thought about that.
24:42
Yes, it really good point because I'm actually originally
24:45
from London and just think it's been years since I was because I
24:49
live in somewhere else now, but those things people just kind of
24:53
do automatically, you don't even get told to do that.
24:57
It just, you just do it. But I guess it would just kind
25:01
of got decided by people. It's just a natural flow of
25:04
things, but yeah, that's a really good point.
25:11
So what? Okay?
25:15
This next question, I want to kind of come at this from your
25:19
individual perspective because as I said before we actually
25:23
went on camera and I'm just kind of saying this to my audience
25:25
now as well. I don't really go into to really
25:29
Politics on my show or controversially.
25:31
I've always kind of like to focus on my guests,
25:34
specifically, them, and their lives and their opinions and
25:37
thoughts and feelings. I have had people on the show
25:41
that have had like, particular, political views and such, but I
25:45
It's a kind of give a general overview rather than, you know,
25:49
going into bet the debates or anything like that, but I wanted
25:53
to kind of get your thoughts, and opinions, firstly, as a
25:57
young person, but also, as someone from Israel, what can
26:04
you kind of tell us from your perspective about the political
26:08
situation and sort of General Life in Israel?
26:14
What did you mean? In in the sense of the
26:16
israeli-palestinian conflict or just everyday life under this
26:20
government, all of the above really you know just from your
26:24
perspective as someone living in another country.
26:28
Okay I'll start with the Plain Jane stuff which is just you
26:30
know, everyday life, you know, Benjamin Netanyahu.
26:36
He was the Prime Minister for I think 12 years such 13 mmm and
26:44
Reese about Eight months ago, this new government under prime
26:53
minister naphtali Bennett. The prime minister is, it's like
26:57
the president in the US. Okay.
26:59
Yes. Most of the political
27:01
authorities. And people especially in the
27:07
center to left-wing, they really loved Netanyahu loathe him.
27:14
There were gigantic protests in Jerusalem and in Tel Aviv
27:19
calling for the, for netanyahu's had basically, no, not in the
27:23
sense of actually beheading him, but in the sense of this morning
27:28
him because he has accusations that he actually accepted, Right
27:35
from from Rich tycoons in order to so he can give them a tag a
27:44
gimpy can give them tax tax breaks.
27:49
Yeah. And that's one thing I don't
27:54
know how true it is. Like I have a right wing friend
27:58
who vehemently says like the media is making this up.
28:03
He's innocent And it's absurd. I don't know, but I think she
28:09
still did some dirty stuff if you ask me, but this new
28:14
government is not perfect either prices keep Rising.
28:19
There's still a lot of Injustice, still a lot of of
28:24
corruption. It didn't disappear, like this.
28:28
It will take a lot of time and a lot of work.
28:32
And of course things will never be perfect.
28:34
That's how the world goes things when I would be perfect but I
28:38
think like life in under this government will be marginally
28:43
better for the the middle class, 925 majority which makes up most
28:50
of the population. Of course, there are the leads
28:54
to make extreme amount of money and own like multiple houses and
29:01
then there's the dirt. Poor woman may be homeless
29:05
believe in the Additional insecurity that kind of stuff
29:10
but I talked about the, you know, 925 middle-class.
29:14
Yeah, we have two kids that this, that kind of population, I
29:18
think life will be a little better for them.
29:21
Would you say the class divide is particularly large between
29:27
all those classes because we still have a class system here
29:30
in the UK as well? And maybe it's not as large as
29:36
it used to be, but it isn't Some areas.
29:38
But would you would you say that you notice that particular is,
29:41
is there a big divide? Whoa, that you know what?
29:47
I read Harry Potter when I was 12 or 11 so I can understand
29:52
what you're talking about. Like Draco, Malfoy it was always
29:56
there again. He bullied Ron Weasley for being
29:59
poor which kind of sums it up. Yeah.
30:03
Israel. I mean the Divine is not that
30:08
huge. I mean you I mean eighty percent
30:11
of the population is Under spectrum of that, you know, 925
30:17
yeah, middle class maybe have a few thousand shekels in their
30:23
bank account and they pretty much live month two months, they
30:28
that's pretty much 80% of the population in varying amounts of
30:34
Financial Security. Of course, a lot of you change
30:38
because covid hit and I hope it's okay to say it.
30:42
I don't want your Video getting demonetized on YouTube later,
30:46
but would you been with regards to?
30:49
Oh, don't worry about that. I mean, I don't even because
30:53
some YouTube videos, I listen to what they have, what they said,
30:57
either the pandemic or the c word that does.
31:00
Cause I'll just say this is a side note, I don't really focus
31:07
on on YouTube, like, obviously the podcast is available on
31:11
YouTube and twitch and stuff in Video form.
31:14
But YouTube is kind of quick to censor stuff.
31:18
I've actually had one episode fully band because for about 2
31:23
seconds we spoke about q and on and it was literally
31:27
descriptive. Yeah, it was descriptive as
31:29
well. It's not what queuing on if
31:32
you've heard of that. And I know, I don't look it up,
31:36
it's just conspiracies. Yeah, point is because I had to,
31:41
obviously review this afterwards to see what the problem was, and
31:45
it was a five minute clip of us just talking about it just just
31:50
like, yeah, I was like, oh, I don't really know much about
31:52
that and he was like, oh well, this is what it is and it was
31:55
kind of tongue-in-cheek, but it was descriptive.
31:57
It wasn't like, this is the case, this is what you should
32:00
believe, or something like that. It was literally just
32:02
descriptive. And that was Off to get not only
32:05
the clip ban but the entire episode band which I was a
32:08
sight, okay? But as far as because you were
32:12
talking more about monetization, I don't think you get
32:15
demonetized generally for mentioning like coronavirus or
32:19
whatever and even if you did, I don't earn any money from
32:23
YouTube. I have less than 1000
32:25
subscribers. I try not to focus on numbers,
32:28
focus more on creating good quality quality.
32:32
Yes, good. Nations and who knows?
32:36
Maybe one day, we'll hit those numbers and we'll get somewhere.
32:39
But I don't know. It's I don't know as far as
32:44
growing online and growing in general in life, you know, it
32:49
takes time and you don't just get things like that overnight
32:52
and if you did, I don't think you'd appreciate them as much.
32:55
So yeah, exactly Rome wasn't built in a day.
32:59
So back to what we were talking about regarding the class divide
33:05
Laughs divide isn't that big? Of course the the rich live in a
33:10
bubble of their own is in every country and they all go to the
33:14
same golf clubs and they all own pretty much the houses in the
33:19
same in the same neighborhoods in Pali.
33:22
Switzerland, Hollywood, Florida, wherever, okay.
33:28
Sabia over maybe some young with you, which are the places with
33:32
the ultra-rich leap live. But the class divide isn't very,
33:38
very big for the, I mean, 80 80 percent remaining, which in the
33:44
top Echelon 30%, we have the, okay, we're financially where
33:49
we're lost. We can survive a crisis, we have
33:52
a future plan and I must admit. I'm pretty much in that top
33:55
Echelon. I live in a very pretty house.
33:58
Big house on the last floor. My bedroom is very big, I know
34:04
you. I can see that but my bedroom is
34:06
very large and I'm an only child so I used to have two bedrooms
34:12
for me. Okay well they go and in the
34:15
bottom Echelon of the 80% you know you you have that the
34:20
people usually in overdraft they have a hard time probably they
34:27
earn like about 10 to 20% above minimum wage.
34:32
They have really hard time. Maybe they even Have some sort
34:35
of debt, they need to run. How much I think we've lost you
34:43
there at large? I mean, the fact that my family
34:47
and I don't live in poverty, doesn't mean we're pissed,
34:51
you're not pissed to see Injustice.
34:55
How much is minimum wage in Israel?
34:59
Oh, I think it's around. Can I check that as we go?
35:07
Yeah, go for it. It's wondering what it would be
35:11
equivalent to. All right.
35:12
All right. All right.
35:14
Okay, let's see for a full time job for an adult.
35:22
With a constant stream of income.
35:24
Let me a monthly income, it's 5050.
35:29
Three hundred shekels translated to pounds and dollars.
35:40
It's actually 1250 pounds. Okay, I'll just converted to
35:50
u.s. dollars just to clarify. It's about almost 1700 dollars.
35:59
It's about the same as here in the UK, give or take actually
36:04
sounds about right. Maybe a little bit above it but
36:07
yeah, quick comparable. Just going back to, you know,
36:19
you think in the getting becoming a therapist.
36:21
One day you thinking, maybe of studying at University, to do
36:25
that in Israel, or maybe you might go abroad or something to
36:28
do that or do that you actually hit the nail on the head.
36:33
I mean, my mother and her husband, the they actually want
36:39
me to go to either Bulgaria or another Eastern European
36:44
country. To study that because tuition is
36:48
much much cheaper. And there's that guy actually
36:52
plans for foreigners to study subject to get their diploma.
37:00
And then that diploma is actually eligible in all
37:05
European Union. Okay?
37:07
Maybe I won't go to the UK to work after you guys get the
37:12
brexit but I can go anywhere else.
37:15
I know it's a bit of a frustrating thing that I mean, I
37:19
think I mean, immigration in this country is always
37:24
important, and, and the UK government knows that into spite
37:27
of all, this ridiculous nonsense that's occurred in the last few
37:31
years. So there will be measures in
37:33
place to make sure that people can still come work in this
37:37
country and such, but that exit is really going to make things
37:42
difficult. I think in years to come, I
37:44
don't think we've really seen the impact of it just yet.
37:48
We've seen it in the country as far as like, Issues with trade
37:53
and supplies and stuff like that.
37:55
But when it comes to actual Workforce and stuff, I think
37:57
we're going to see that in 5 to 10 years.
37:59
So something needs to be done about that.
38:03
I understand actually, my mother is in the living room.
38:06
She's talking on the phone video, her.
38:08
I thought hear anything just hear your voice, I hear.
38:13
So I think maybe you hear her too, never mind, never mind.
38:17
So I know studying psychology is hard, but but smack it every
38:27
every occupation almost you take as an adult is hard.
38:32
Yep, even if it's something you really Envision yourself going,
38:36
it's like kids. When you ask them, what do you
38:38
want to do? When you grow up and they're
38:40
like a soccer player and you're like, when you're an adult and
38:45
like you said, oh, you know how much practice it takes know, how
38:49
many foods you need not to eat? You know, how many a whole
38:53
teammates you need to deal with? You know, how many frustrating
38:57
moments there are? I think it's all about.
39:03
I suppose if you have kids or your oil, you know, working with
39:06
kids in as a teacher or something, you've got a just
39:11
teach them about dedication and discipline.
39:13
I think that's kind of the key to that, you know, and it but
39:16
it's difficult to teach that because as you say, there's lots
39:21
of Setbacks in life, there's lots of situations where things
39:26
don't go your way. And it's about how you bounce
39:31
back from that and keep persevering and keep pursuing it
39:34
in despite of your failures. In despite of how life is you
39:40
seemingly? Yeah, well, not unfair
39:43
necessarily, but just, you know, throwing barriers in your way, I
39:46
think a lot of people tend to give up too early.
39:49
You know, sometimes I see people comment on my Videos and say oh
39:54
why don't you have like loads of views and likes and all this
39:57
stuff and it's like, well because that stuff doesn't
40:00
really come overnight and it's not guaranteed any way I could
40:04
do this for maybe, like, five, ten years and never get anywhere
40:06
and touch word. I don't want that to happen.
40:08
I would like to get someone with it, but nothing is guaranteed.
40:13
And the only way you know, it's like the lottery you got to be
40:17
in it to win it, you've got to be doing it.
40:18
If you're not doing it, you're not getting anywhere.
40:20
If you are doing it, you've at least Got an opportunity but
40:24
that's all it is. You're working for an
40:26
opportunity and when you get given opportunities in life,
40:30
you've got to take advantage of them.
40:32
But nothing is guaranteed. And and this is it's a difficult
40:37
world that we live in, isn't it? You know, it's like a lot of the
40:40
time, it's not what you know it's who, you know.
40:43
But as you say in many career paths are in taking football.
40:46
As an example, it's about how much dedication and time and
40:50
effort you put in and even then, Even if you like Christ, I've,
40:54
I've, I mean, this isn't really the same thing, but it will
40:57
illustrate a little bit of a point when I was growing up.
41:00
As a teenager, I play five-a-side football at places
41:05
and sometimes, you know, there'd be a group of kids that would
41:08
come down that are, you know, in youth teams or their training to
41:14
be in youth teams and they would completely destroy us, just
41:18
just, you know, 20 Neil. Yes, it's ridiculous.
41:20
Like that, they just make us look like fools.
41:22
And I remember thinking even back, then that a lot of those
41:26
kids wouldn't make it even though they are amazing.
41:32
That there's so much competition.
41:35
There's so many people working just as hard as you, if not
41:38
harder. And they may or may not make it,
41:42
many of them won't make it, you know.
41:45
And I think you just have to kind of realistically, manage
41:48
your expectations and just put in your absolute best effort and
41:52
hope for a bit of luck. Really, and truthfully, exactly.
41:57
Also like you don't, you don't only do that for the outcomes.
42:02
You'll see in the far future. You also do that for something
42:06
else. I mean, for, for being
42:08
productive, for being disciplined productivity
42:12
discipline to have something. Stay In your life.
42:16
I mean, I work as a dishwasher not just to earn money, of
42:19
course, the money is important. I mean, I have a boatload of
42:25
cash right here. I mean, you can't see it because
42:29
I operate from the cftc webcam. But still yeah, I said I sounded
42:39
like some either mobster rapper right now, like you're both lot
42:43
of cash, it looks pretty easy. Just going to start guy like
42:46
that on the camera, like cheese. Yeah, yeah.
42:55
Oh my God, actually it's not just for that, it's for the
42:59
camaraderie. So you know we're all working
43:01
for the same thing which is to serve food to people and and
43:07
help them help them be satiated. It also like it's satisfying to
43:13
see that your efforts are there for to put forth are actually
43:17
giving some sort of desired outcomes, like when I see, you
43:23
know, without the Assure you. You have nothing to serve the
43:28
food with, hmm. The point.
43:31
Yeah. No, everything is an important
43:34
Cog in the world. Sometimes I, you know, I think
43:36
about that like you get these judgmental people in life that
43:38
look down on, you know, and I've had it, I remember working as as
43:43
a waiter and and the way people spoke to me, sometimes I was
43:50
ready to throw hands. Like it's just like are you
43:53
kidding me? But you know it's because they
43:58
just had lack respect And they don't understand it.
44:03
Maybe that too but a lot of the time it's just, you know people
44:07
like and respect. You know, I the way I look at
44:09
life is that you should treat everyone with the same respect
44:13
that you would want you know and that's not the way, it's not
44:17
even me trying to preach. I just think that like in
44:19
general in life, no one is better than everyone.
44:24
We all we will get born in two different scenarios and we all
44:28
have different levels of Legend different, you know, barriers
44:32
that we're facing and different opportunities and such but most
44:35
of us have to work our asses off for everything we have in life
44:40
and any opportunities were given.
44:43
We just have to jump at them because they don't often come.
44:47
And I think that When you get people that judge you for doing
44:53
something, you know maybe a mean more menial job.
44:56
I mean I think that says more about them than it does say
44:59
about you. I think it says that they're
45:00
just kind of where they're just, they're just low.
45:06
They just, you know, they they like respect.
45:10
No. I don't know that I would say
45:12
they're insecure. I think they just kind of, they
45:14
lack respect. They like, Empathy.
45:18
They like many of these basic things that I don't know.
45:21
Like, if I'm sitting at a restaurant it, even before I
45:25
worked in the customer service industry, like I never win a
45:27
dreamt of speaking to people, the way that I've been spoken
45:30
to, or the way I see, sometimes people speak to people and it's
45:35
just like, I think people a lot of the time the act in that way
45:40
towards people in the service industry, I think it's a
45:43
psychological thing of they want to feel better than people.
45:47
They feel maybe you're right. Actually the insecurity thing,
45:50
maybe it is just that they lack confidence within themselves.
45:54
They lack something in their life so they take it out on
45:58
someone else to make themselves feel better.
46:00
I basically look like bullies, to be honest, same sort of
46:03
principle, but it just makes them like an ass, you know?
46:09
And everyone like you ever see that happened?
46:11
You ever sit in a restaurant, you see that happened, like not
46:14
no one's looking at the server going all.
46:16
What did they do wrong? I'm looking at that person
46:18
speaking to that person going nuts, here are actually pretty
46:25
common. I mean, there's a viral.
46:28
There was a viral video. I think it was shot like four
46:32
years ago. Six years ago, few years ago of
46:36
a lady and in an airplane and the flight attendant wouldn't
46:41
sell chocolate to her to burn their flight mates and she
46:46
started Yelling at with with such brutality and aggression
46:54
and that that was actually collect.
46:58
I said, yeah, I mean, who are they ugly Israel young Israeli
47:03
which is not ugly as in like aesthetically in unpleasing but
47:11
as in rude impolite Entitled. Sorry.
47:19
English is not my first language.
47:20
So sometimes to find the word and that is actually kind of
47:30
like seeing these videos because it's a music.
47:34
I must admit, it's amusing. But if I would encounter that in
47:38
real life, especially if I'm the person being talked to.
47:41
I mean, I probably either Reserve myself, Off or if I'm
47:47
really exhausted like an into a yelling match which is not
47:52
desired. It's like it's like giving them
47:55
fuel to the fire. I think I worked in customer
47:59
services for about six or seven years in total and I could
48:04
probably count like three times that I even lost it or a
48:10
snapback customer. And like I remember one time it
48:15
was is a really hot day. I was working as a server at
48:18
some restaurant or hotel and we had like this Lounge area like
48:25
it was like a it was a lounge area and then there was a place
48:28
that we did like English afternoon tea which was a
48:31
slightly bit fancier area and then there's the Terrace
48:34
outside, right? So everyone.
48:36
Yeah, exactly. So everyone's outside because
48:39
it's a beautiful day, it's by a river.
48:41
You know you can imagine the scene but it's packed.
48:44
There's nowhere to sit. Wait to sit.
48:47
So and naturally there's no one indoors everyone's Outdoors.
48:50
So, indoors is basically empty and there's this couple that
48:54
come in and they're like, we would like a place to sit and I
48:57
said, oh unfortunately, we're busy.
49:00
So I don't know how long the wait will be, but if you find a
49:03
place, please feel free to sit down, right?
49:05
And I thought that would be the end of it.
49:06
And they were like, oh well, we're going to sit here and you
49:11
can go and find us a place when, when it becomes available and
49:15
they can Can see, right? I've got like I don't know 15
49:18
things in my hands. We're all running back and forth
49:21
that would clearly very busy and stressed out and I'm like okay
49:25
and that's the thing in the midst of this while we're going
49:29
back and forth and back and forth.
49:31
There's pick new people coming in and finding spots where
49:35
people have left and we haven't even had the opportunity to
49:38
clear the tables yet, right? That's how busy.
49:40
It's like, people just, they're like, vultures they see it and
49:43
they go for it. But fine, great, its Come first
49:46
serve, right? It's not reserved.
49:49
And I remember this couple as I'm passing back and forth, they
49:54
stop me and say you promised us to find a place you use.
50:00
You said you were gonna find us a place but then this couple
50:04
came in after us and they've sat down and you're serving them
50:07
first and I just said, Its first come first serve and it's up to
50:13
you like I can't, you know I mean like we do our best but you
50:18
know we can't help if people go and sit there before we've even
50:22
had a chance to interact with it.
50:24
You know I mean like if I have genuinely had the opportunity to
50:26
clear the table and no one is going to that table, I would
50:30
have gone over to them and brought them over to the table.
50:34
But I didn't have that opportunity because we were so
50:36
busy yet. We had to turn people away.
50:38
That's how busy we were. And they, you know, me and it's
50:42
that kind of stupidity because they were then launching into me
50:46
and being like, oh, this is worse customers or a hammer, or
50:49
get your, get your manager. And then, you know, naturally,
50:51
my manager comes and says the exact same thing that I have
50:54
said because and it's just, I don't know, man.
51:00
I think sometimes they just like to just be dicks part of my
51:04
Which for no reason just to make themselves feel better, I don't
51:07
know. And it know I think maybe this
51:11
the it's not actually malicious intent, it's just maybe no, no,
51:15
ya know that I don't doubt that they I think look, they Strode
51:21
down as a nice day. You know, they saw, oh, there's
51:24
this nice place all over the river, wouldn't it be nice to
51:26
sit on this Terrace and yeah, I agree, right, but I can't help
51:31
you. I can't put a table from out of
51:33
my ass. And have you sit on it, you know
51:35
what I mean? Like, I'm not a magician, I do
51:39
the best with what I had and we were hideously understaffed like
51:42
every other restaurant probably in the world.
51:46
And it's just, what can you do in a situation like that?
51:49
And and that's the thing they can.
51:52
The customer thinks they can speak to you in a rude Manner
51:56
and get away with it because you're you won't say anything.
51:59
Because if you do, you'll get fired, right?
52:01
But I snap back because it's like, no, you're in the And I
52:05
wasn't rude in the sense that I said anything, I shouldn't have
52:08
but I was a bit like, no look, you know, we've done our best
52:10
here and we can't help that this is the situation, you know, and
52:14
then yeah firm. But fair like, yeah, it's that's
52:18
awesome. What you do sometimes?
52:21
Have to stand up for yourself. You know, and you get these
52:23
people. You're like, for instance, I
52:25
disagree with the classic saying of the customer's always, right?
52:28
That's bullshit. The customer is not always right
52:30
often. The customer is wrong and
52:32
entitled and thinks they Deserve to be given everything for
52:36
nothing. Customer is often wrong.
52:41
It did a bit like if if the if the rules are very laid out,
52:44
very fairly right and straightforward, it's your fault
52:48
for not, you know, reading the situation.
52:53
So going back to the snow. So I know I'm going a bit of a
52:55
tangent here but just bear with me that's kind of customer
52:59
behavior is actually kind of giving evidence to my feet.
53:04
Re that everyone has autism to some degree.
53:09
Interesting, what they say is a spectrum that the autism
53:12
spectrum. I mean, even though people
53:14
aren't diagnosed, that's my theory, even people who aren't
53:18
diagnosed. They still exhibit some traits
53:22
that usually are characteristics of autistic people.
53:27
Like I mean, they're not deserving of the actual clinical
53:31
diagnosis, but still, they exhibit some sort of some of the
53:36
traits which are the criteria For diagnosing autism.
53:40
That's how I think he might be on to something there, because I
53:42
can think of so many instances where I care for the explain to
53:46
someone why we couldn't help them or why we couldn't deliver
53:49
the thing that we wanted to deliver and it was very clear,
53:52
you know, nuts and bolts. This is the reason and then we
53:56
still had to have an argument for an hour and a half or an
53:59
hour where I was just repeating myself.
54:04
And it's like they just didn't get the most basic thing.
54:08
So maybe that maybe you're right.
54:10
Maybe there was an element to that.
54:12
Maybe maybe it's a thing. I don't know.
54:16
Yes it's those kinds of arguments are kind of like
54:19
putting sand through a meat grinder.
54:21
Like it provides no. Outcome it exactly the same.
54:25
This is It's just wasting my time, I'll be honest.
54:27
Like and that's the thing I've got so many examples of where
54:33
that happened like so many across all the different places
54:37
that I worked over the years. And I can't help but feel that
54:42
it's not because of anything. I did it was because I was I was
54:46
always like I'm not mr. Perfect.
54:48
But you know, I would oh I always knew how to speak to
54:51
people. I always knew how to keep my
54:54
temper and keep it together and be professional and I realized
54:57
the consequences of not doing so and you know, but at the same
55:02
time, like we're still human beings and if someone is
55:05
disrespectful to you and rude, it's very difficult.
55:08
To continue to just take that and be nice.
55:14
When someone is actively being nasty.
55:16
Eventually, you get to a point where it's like, Shut up.
55:20
I don't want to serve you. For example, when I worked in a
55:23
supermarket, if someone was rude to me because here's the thing,
55:28
there's this Supermarket here in the UK called waitrose, right?
55:32
And it's the supermarket are worked for.
55:33
This was many many years ago. Just think Posh upmarket
55:37
Supermarket, basically for the middle class.
55:40
Anyway, they had this thing which other supermarkets don't
55:44
have. So if you go into a don't know
55:47
store Or and they don't have something on the Shelf while
55:51
they just don't have it, you know, I mean, they just they
55:53
obviously out of that thing. But for some reason in waitrose
55:57
it was different. Like if something wasn't on the
55:59
Shelf the customers were enabled and encouraged to ask the staff
56:05
to go and check upstairs even though we know we don't have it.
56:10
It was this pointless exercise every time so be like, oh yes of
56:13
course Madam. Yes, I'll go upstairs and check
56:15
for that even and here's the thing, I would know that we
56:19
don't have it upstairs. I know that for a fact So and I
56:23
would say I'm sorry, we don't have this and then I Kyle pitch.
56:26
Could you check anyway? Okay, then I will go upstairs,
56:30
even though I've told you that we don't have it.
56:32
So you're calling me a liar. Basically.
56:34
And what I would do is I would just go upstairs.
56:37
Have a coffee. Walk around a bit chat to some
56:39
people. No.
56:40
Because look, if they're gonna waste my time I'm going to waste
56:43
their time, right? And then I'd come back
56:45
downstairs and I'd be like, look, I've looked upstairs and
56:51
we don't have it and then the Oh, well, this is unacceptable.
56:55
How could you not have this on the shop floor and one?
56:58
Or two things that happened? Either one?
57:00
They would say, oh, I'm going to shop at Sainsbury's and I'd be
57:03
like, okay, see ya or they would be like, I want to speak to a
57:08
manager, and here's what would happen.
57:11
So, the manager were coming. Yeah, no serious is true.
57:15
The manager will come up to you and they would often in front of
57:19
the customer be like, oh Christian.
57:21
Do we do we have the upstairs and I'd be like, No because no
57:24
matter don't know, maybe they know but mostly they're just
57:26
doing other shit. They don't have time to check
57:28
this fucking Warehouse every five minutes.
57:32
So they trust you because they know you're dealing with it and
57:37
they would ask me and I'll be like, no, we don't have it.
57:39
And then they would say to the customers.
57:40
Sorry, we don't have it and then they would be like, I'm writing
57:43
to head office and it's like, oh, good luck with that because
57:48
good office, I'm gonna reply, it's just, it's a particular The
57:53
customer the I don't get me wrong.
57:55
I'm not saying that there aren't bad employees out there.
57:57
Because there are, there are people that don't work hard and
58:00
a rude and everything. So it does go both ways but
58:03
there is this particular type of customer, you know, some people
58:07
call it the Karen, some people have other words for it, it
58:10
exists and it exists everywhere in the world and in all
58:14
different types of customer service.
58:18
Industries and you know that here's another quick example.
58:23
II know I've gone a tangent here but just bear with me.
58:26
We had this thing at waitrose and I don't understand why we
58:29
did it and sorry to blast waitrose that you guys are
58:32
awesome. But back in the day you did
58:34
stuff like this, where you would, you would go up to the, I
58:41
would say, I would see a customer, right?
58:43
Grab like a box of cornflakes poke holes in them.
58:48
B would like a pencil. Bring it over to the customer
58:52
sir, excuse me is customer service desk.
58:55
And be like, this product is damaged, or you need to give me
58:59
a reduction on this product, is product is damaged and the
59:03
manager knowing that this is, you know, been purposefully on
59:07
apart. Yeah, would give a refund to
59:13
that person straight away. And then, there are other times
59:17
when the person, but they bought, like, maybe a sandwich
59:20
or something, right. Ate like three bites of it and
59:24
came back and said, I need Refund.
59:25
I need to refund this, something wrong with this, and then they
59:28
would get what's called a double refund, so they would get their
59:32
money back. Plus the product for free or
59:35
exchanged. And then they walk away and they
59:39
did that so many times. I saw a particular manager do
59:42
this so many times and I was like, you know, that they're
59:46
lying, right? And they do this every week and
59:49
every week you just give them that money and I think they just
59:54
played stupid because it was easier than receiving
59:57
complaints. I think that's why they did it.
1:00:00
But I can't say I agree with it. I think that's stupid.
1:00:03
I don't think you should set a precedent.
1:00:04
If you know people are taking advantage of you, don't let them
1:00:07
take advantage. Aw that's easier said that done
1:00:10
man that's also something I did with just stop.
1:00:14
I still have a hard time like holding my own regarding what I
1:00:17
want. And what I mean they still have
1:00:19
a hard time with that. But it's something that I work
1:00:27
through and I'll get to the point where I'm proficient
1:00:30
enough in expressing my wants and needs and actually saying
1:00:34
no, sorry that's not right. For me right now.
1:00:37
Maybe another day and I already do that.
1:00:42
I have not seen that. We already knew that.
1:00:48
What's the biggest life lesson that you've learned so far?
1:00:52
Yeah, yeah. That's that's that's pretty
1:00:59
well. That's a tricky question me to
1:01:01
think about that. What's the life lesson of
1:01:07
learned? That most of the the negativity
1:01:16
that occurs to us is actually our own bit ability.
1:01:21
I mean, yeah, you can have a difficult day at work.
1:01:25
You can have you can break up with somebody, you really love
1:01:29
or just have a very major disagreement.
1:01:34
And, and I'm guilty of this. I'm very guilty of this
1:01:37
extremely guilty of this. Every damn guilty of this, but I
1:01:41
always remind myself like, yeah, you're putting yourself through
1:01:45
unnecessary pain and suffering, dude, chill.
1:01:52
So that's something I really first of all, I am bread.
1:01:57
Absolutely embraced. I've absolutely embraced the
1:02:00
responsibility for that and I understand it.
1:02:03
Something that's, that's a matter of my perception but
1:02:10
still, it's something that my brain.
1:02:13
It's like it's going to literally can't resist when you
1:02:16
try to change it and it's because the my brain I'll say
1:02:23
straight up. My brain is very, very stubborn.
1:02:25
And I'm like, all right brain, I'll write it down.
1:02:28
All right? Ray, I have this notebook.
1:02:30
Actually, it really helps me to manage my mood and journal my
1:02:35
thoughts, and all that kind of stuff.
1:02:37
And I say, okay, I understand it's very hard to change this
1:02:40
belief. I know, I believe that I was
1:02:45
being like, I was being the victim in this situation but
1:02:51
maybe Maybe it's maybe. Look at the bigger picture,
1:02:54
like, say okay, I had this fight with my very good friend, which
1:02:59
is almost like my girlfriend except for a way.
1:03:03
We don't, we don't do sexual intercourse and we don't have
1:03:07
Intimacy in the physical way, but we all thought we had all
1:03:15
these good interactions. So obsessing about this one -
1:03:20
interaction, where we Read strongly about something and
1:03:25
maybe exchanged a few heated Words In the Heat of the Moment,
1:03:30
it's not that big when you look at it and it's still something I
1:03:34
work on and it's still something I need to practice and I need to
1:03:39
practice a lot. But as they say, practice makes
1:03:44
perfect, maybe not perfect, because nothing's perfect.
1:03:47
But, but practice makes Perfection see.
1:03:51
If I go to litigation Direction, that's a quite right there,
1:03:55
practice makes perfect sense e. Brilliant.
1:03:58
Brilliant. As we draw things to a close
1:04:02
today, do you have any upcoming upcoming project?
1:04:06
See, I'm not perfect. Do you have any upcoming
1:04:08
projects or final thoughts that you'd like to share damn?
1:04:13
Like, I really like to share that.
1:04:16
I really stepped up my guitar practice and team like I'm
1:04:20
practice for me. Time.
1:04:21
And I tried to practice more outside of my comfort zone.
1:04:25
Like, if I had this disco change, for instance, I'm trying
1:04:29
to change code from G to D Minor, which is a chord change.
1:04:35
I'm really freaking good at and like I'll put a drum machine
1:04:40
set, a kick drum at quarter notes, you know what I'm talking
1:04:44
about? So it will be like a metronome
1:04:48
because I can't stand the clicking of a metronome.
1:04:50
It pisses me off to no end. So that would just a drum
1:04:53
machine and put a kick drum because the it sounds way better
1:04:57
than this. And so I just do for down
1:05:05
Strokes of that chord and then I try and change the Cordon Bleu
1:05:08
for downstrokes and so on. And also I work on my down
1:05:11
picking speed picking alternate picking.
1:05:17
I haven't started really solos. Although I play guitar for
1:05:20
almost like a year and a half now, even worse than that.
1:05:24
But I mean that's really something that I want to excel
1:05:29
at and you talked about determination and and dealing
1:05:33
with setbacks and hardships and sometimes like my BPM is not
1:05:37
going to be as good. It's not going to be as good.
1:05:40
I'm gonna be honest with you but I'll tell myself is like do what
1:05:44
you can keep practicing even if it's like 10 20 BPM lower than
1:05:51
what you did last week. So effing what Just keep
1:05:54
practicing. No, it's not a linear process,
1:05:57
sometimes you go up, sometimes you go down and that's all
1:06:00
right, that's like letting instrument like doing every
1:06:06
skill based Endeavor. It's gonna be, it's not going to
1:06:11
be linear graph like a m, times X, plus b type.
1:06:16
It's going to be a very, very curvy graph.
1:06:21
And another thing I'd like to tell is that gotta tell these
1:06:25
stories crazy story about how my mother and her current husband
1:06:29
men. Like, that's pretty crazy.
1:06:32
Actually, nine years ago, I was 10 years old.
1:06:37
My birth. My 19th.
1:06:38
Birthday is actually this upcoming Friday.
1:06:41
So, so almost 10 years old. Yeah, 10 years old, me, and my
1:06:49
mother. We were living in this.
1:06:51
First floor apartment, was pretty small was too close to
1:06:55
the street corners would wake her up very often.
1:07:00
And so ultimately, we decided to move to our current house and my
1:07:09
aunt, my mother's sister, and her brother-in-law, they
1:07:13
recommended on a certain handyman /, renovate renovator
1:07:20
to To actually do the renovations.
1:07:24
And he he's actually he he has long hair, he speaks with a very
1:07:30
very Bulgarian accent, very you hear that accident, you know,
1:07:37
it's him. That's how this think it is and
1:07:40
I can't personally but I know how to impersonate the Russian
1:07:43
accent for not businesses and so he he did the renovation.
1:07:50
Like it was cool. They kept each other's phone
1:07:52
numbers I think. Think like, I'll shake that up
1:07:55
with my mom afterwards. We'll finish here and so
1:08:00
afterwards that and they were actually not meant for each
1:08:03
other in the place that surface level because my mother, she was
1:08:08
all about her job and me, like, I actually making sure my needs
1:08:14
are met and that I'm going to the necessary treatments and
1:08:21
practice sessions of the Skills that I need especially verbal
1:08:26
skills and he he lived in southern Tel Aviv, which is the
1:08:32
more like more. It's like the East End of
1:08:35
London. If you understand what I mean.
1:08:37
It's like mainly immigrant. It's pretty poor.
1:08:41
It's somewhat like the controversial place.
1:08:44
Maybe there's crime going on. It's kind of like that.
1:08:49
It's kind of like the East End of London.
1:08:51
Oh, Harlem in New York and so he was actually living there back
1:08:57
then he was going to drink beer with his body's.
1:09:01
He didn't want to commit the key recently broke up with his then
1:09:05
wife, but then in some crazy turn of events.
1:09:09
Like either one of them invited the other to meet and I was at
1:09:15
that meeting, I think it was him who invited her to his house
1:09:18
because he really thought she is Is really something that
1:09:24
something someone that will be right for him.
1:09:29
And so he invited her to his apartment.
1:09:31
I was there it wasn't a one or two bedroom, apartment, very
1:09:34
small apartment. Very very dominant cigarettes.
1:09:39
No, because he smoked a lot back, then he still smokes, but
1:09:43
less because they had a medical issue.
1:09:45
And so then they kept, you know, calling each other and good coin
1:09:52
each other. They they were meeting in in
1:09:57
increasing frequencies are in first was like once every two
1:10:02
weeks then it was once a week. Once every 10 days then it was
1:10:09
twice a week Thrice a week, four times a week and eventually a
1:10:15
year. So after a year and a half is
1:10:17
often the first met The actually he moved in with us, he left his
1:10:24
apartment in sounds in Tel, Aviv and moved in with us.
1:10:27
That was difficult as shit. I'm going with difficulties shit
1:10:32
like he I was eleven. Okay.
1:10:36
Yes. I was 11 and as you know, eleven
1:10:38
year olds are massive Abel's massive and I was no exception.
1:10:43
I was rude, I didn't care like even my grandma would call me
1:10:47
like Next to you is is above
1:11:10
everything. So it sounds like rude, not
1:11:16
uneducated nothing. Getting the sense of stupid but
1:11:19
uneducated in the sense of uncultured and I thought like
1:11:25
why is this dude? Why did man coming?
1:11:28
Like he doesn't want to be my dad, I wanted so bad to be my
1:11:32
dad. I'm actually the result of a
1:11:34
sperm donation. So I don't know who my
1:11:36
biological father is and up until the age of 10.
1:11:39
It was only me and my mom. And so then he came in and I had
1:11:45
this kind of Oedipus complex. You know what?
1:11:48
I'm talking about. Well, I kind of wanted to kick
1:11:52
him out. I actually had that thought back
1:11:54
then like oh, I want two men out.
1:11:57
Like what what does he do? He why did my mom bring him to
1:12:00
you? And my mom explained to me, I
1:12:03
love you but it's not the same type of love because I love you
1:12:08
unconditionally, but him it's another type of luggage and now
1:12:13
I've been like a year and a half ago.
1:12:16
I've been in In a four-month relationship with a girl like, I
1:12:21
liked her, but it didn't love her.
1:12:23
You know what I'm saying? Like she was a very nice person.
1:12:26
She was kind. She was humble.
1:12:28
She was, she was very polite. I really, really liked her.
1:12:34
Like, I'd say, yeah. I really like her to be the
1:12:36
mother of my children, but she's like, she was, like, not
1:12:41
somebody. I'd like to engage in intimacy
1:12:44
with and so, in the end, she thought the same about Like,
1:12:48
he's really nice too, but I would like to hook up with him.
1:12:53
So we eventually broke up, like I said, okay, see it's not
1:12:57
working. Let's just go each other each to
1:12:59
our own, she agreed. And so, we hugged, and ever
1:13:03
since I've never seen her, but it was a tangent to explain
1:13:09
that. Now, understand that the fact
1:13:11
that she loves him doesn't mean that she doesn't love me and she
1:13:14
doesn't care for me and he also cares for me like not The
1:13:18
emotional way of, you know, you had a really rough day.
1:13:22
Yeah, talk to me, but in the sense of yes office in gum goes
1:13:27
for me. I will inherit everything he has
1:13:31
after he passes away. Eventually, he is me and him.
1:13:38
We really make an effort to tell each other, what's bothering?
1:13:43
Because sometimes like, you have those insane rage attacks.
1:13:47
Because I did something that bothered him.
1:13:49
I didn't even know it bothered him or a new, it wasn't Ian but
1:13:53
I kind of forgot about it. Like it was an automatic and so
1:13:58
only when he got mad understood and so but we've gone through
1:14:03
this very difficult process. Of of you know we had very
1:14:08
difficult moments moments, he was on the verge of leaving
1:14:12
moments. I was like Okay, like okay, once
1:14:18
I turn 21, I've get the hell out of this house because I was 12
1:14:22
13 back. Then I couldn't live alone.
1:14:26
And so, but we got through it and that's something that I
1:14:31
really think about like how crazy this story is, the only
1:14:34
came to renovate our house. Now, they're husband and wife
1:14:37
of, I think 19 months. It's kind of like this adult
1:14:42
videos with the either the pizza delivery.
1:14:46
Yeah, the plumber or whatever. Like, in comes to fix this one
1:14:51
thing and then, you know, happen either.
1:14:57
It's like a crazy story and also, it says, that some things
1:15:00
take worked, many relationships, take work, it's not love at
1:15:05
first sight or see this woman. She's so perfect.
1:15:09
We're gonna bury and actually had this fantasy.
1:15:13
Like, I had a crush when I was 12 to 13.
1:15:16
I really love about it, but back then, it was it real consuming.
1:15:21
Like she was pretty, she was nice and all that.
1:15:26
And I kind of snag her too much. I didn't really know how to
1:15:30
operate with girls. It's really very funny for me
1:15:33
because I remember that and then I can just tell, okay, she
1:15:37
doesn't love me back. And I actually cried first few
1:15:40
days, like I had no motivation but because I had to break up
1:15:44
with the cytosine. And today, like, we're kind of,
1:15:48
we're good with each other. Like, if I'd passed if a tear in
1:15:52
the hallways, like I said, Hi, how are you?
1:15:54
And she was like, be like how are You and as I told her that
1:15:58
sorry like I had no nuances, but but it just shows like we all
1:16:06
grow. And that's something I'm really
1:16:08
big into right now. That humans have the capacity
1:16:11
and the potential to grow and adapt and evolve.
1:16:15
And that's such a beautiful thing that such a beautiful
1:16:19
thing. That really something that I
1:16:23
want to apply my day-to-day life.
1:16:29
Couldn't agree moment. A thank you so much for sharing
1:16:31
her story. It's it's good.
1:16:35
It's good stuff. I appreciate.
1:16:36
I think our listeners will really love hearing.
1:16:40
And yeah I just want to say a massive thank you for being on
1:16:43
the show. It's been it's been really
1:16:45
enjoyable and it's been great getting to know you and
1:16:48
everything and yeah I wish you all the best.
1:16:52
Indeed in just one thing for the YouTube business and purchases
1:16:56
every time it is an on my head or point.
1:16:58
The camera. It means.
1:17:00
I really agree with first. Christian said, okay, I really
1:17:05
agree with that special. Well, thank you very much.
1:17:10
And, to the listeners of the Christian way, podcast be safe,
1:17:14
be well, and I'll see you in the next one.