Latest / Adventure Books Library / 09 - Alice's Adventures in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll

Transcript

09 - Alice's Adventures in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll · Adventure Books Library

• 0:00
  Chapter nine, The Mock Turtle's Story. You can't think how glad I am
• 0:06
  to see you again, you dear old thing, said the Duchess as she
• 0:11
  tucked her arm affectionately into Alice's and they walked off together. Alice was very
• 0:18
  glad to find her in such a pleasant temper, and thought to herself that
• 0:22
  perhaps it was only the pepper that had made her so savage when they met
• 0:26
  in the kitchen. When I'm a duchess, she said to herself, not
• 0:31
  in a very hopeful tone, though I won't have any pepper in my kitchen
• 0:36
  at all. Soup does very well without. Maybe it's always pepper that makes
• 0:43
  people hot tempered, she went on, very much pleased at having found out
• 0:48
  a new kind of rule. And vinegar that makes them sour, and camomeal
• 0:53
  that makes them bitter, and and barley sugar and such things that make children
• 0:58
  sweet tempered. I only wish people knew that, then they wouldn't be so
• 1:02
  stingy about it. You know. She had quite forgotten the Duchess by this
• 1:07
  time, and was a little startled when she heard her voice close to her
• 1:11
  ear. You're thinking about something, my dear, and that makes you forget
• 1:15
  to talk. I can't tell you just now what the moral of that is,
• 1:19
  but I shall remember it in a bit. Perhaps it hasn't one Alice
• 1:23
  ventured to remark. Tout tout child, said the Duchess. Everything's got a
• 1:30
  moral, if only you can find it, and she squeezed herself up closer
• 1:34
  to Alice's side as she spoke. Alice did not much like keeping so close
• 1:40
  to her, first because the Duchess was very ugly, and secondly because she
• 1:45
  was exactly the right height to rest her chin upon Alice's shoulder, and it
• 1:49
  was an uncomfortably sharp chin. However, she did not like to be rude,
• 1:53
  so she bored as well as she could. The game's going on rather
• 1:57
  better now, she said, by way of keeping up the conversation. A
• 2:01
  little tis, so, said the Duchess. And the moral of that is,
• 2:07
  oh tis love. Tis love that makes the world go round, somebody,
• 2:12
  said, Alice whispered that it's done by everybody minding their own business.
• 2:19
  Ah, well, it means much the same thing, said the Duchess,
• 2:23
  digging her sharp little chin into Alice's shoulder as she added. And the moral
• 2:28
  of that is take care of the sense and the sounds will take care of
• 2:32
  themselves. How fond she is of finding morals in things, Alice thought to
• 2:38
  herself, I dare say, you're wondering why I don't put my arm round
• 2:43
  your waist. The Duchess said, after a pause, the reason is that
• 2:46
  I'm doubtful about the temper of your flamingo. Shall I try the experiment he
• 2:53
  might bite? Alice cautiously replied, not feeling at all anxious to have the
• 3:00
  experiment tried. Very true, said the Duchess. Flamingoes and mustard both bite.
• 3:06
  And the moral of that is birds of a feather flock together. Only
• 3:12
  mustard isn't a bird, Alice remarked, Right as usual, said the Duchess.
• 3:17
  What a clear way you have of putting things. It's a mineral,
• 3:22
  I think, said Alice. Of course it is, said the Duchess,
• 3:25
  who seemed ready to agree to everything that Alice said. There's a large mustard
• 3:30
  mine near here, and the moral of that is the more there is of
• 3:35
  mine, the less there is of yours. Oh I know, exclaimed Alice,
• 3:40
  who had not attended to this last remark. It's a vegetable. It
• 3:46
  doesn't look like one, but it is I quite agree with you, said
• 3:51
  the Duchess. And the moral of that is be what you would seem to
• 3:54
  be, or if you'd like it, put more simply, never imagine yourself
• 4:00
  not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others. That what you
• 4:04
  were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have
• 4:09
  appeared to them to be otherwise. I think I should understand that better,
• 4:16
  Alice said, very politely if I had it written down, But I can't
• 4:23
  quite follow it as you say it. That's nothing to what I could say
• 4:27
  if I chose. The Duchess replied, in a pleased tone. Pray,
• 4:31
  don't trouble yourself to say it any longer than that, said Alice. Oh,
• 4:35
  don't talk about trouble, said the Duchess. I make you a present
• 4:40
  of everything I've said as yet a cheap sort of present, thought Alice.
• 4:45
  I'm glad they don't give birthday presents like that, But she did not venture
• 4:48
  to say it out loud. Thinking again, the Duchess asked, with another
• 4:54
  dig of her sharp little chin. I've a right to think, said Alice,
• 4:59
  sharply, for she was beginning to feel a little worried, just about
• 5:02
  as much right, said the duchess, as pigs have to fly and the
• 5:08
  moral. But here, to Alice's great surprise, the Duchess's voice died away
• 5:14
  even in the middle of her favorite word, moral, and the arm that
• 5:17
  was linked into hers began to tremble. Alice looked up and there stood the
• 5:21
  Queen in front of them, with her arms folded, frowning like a thunder
• 5:26
  storm. A fine day, your majesty, the duchess began in a low,
• 5:31
  weak voice. Now I give you fair warning, shouted the queen,
• 5:38
  stamping on the ground as she spoke. Either you or your head must be
• 5:43
  off, and that in about half no time. Take your choice. The
• 5:47
  duchess took her choice and was gone in a moment. Let's go on with
• 5:51
  the game, the queen said to Alice, and Alice was too much frightened
• 5:57
  to say a word, but slowly followed her back to the roquet ground.
• 6:00
  The other guests had taken advantage of the queen's absence and were resting in the
• 6:05
  shade. However, the moment they saw her, they hurried back to the
• 6:10
  game, the queen merely remarking that a moment's delay would cost them their lives.
• 6:15
  All the time they were playing, the Queen never left off quarreling with
• 6:18
  the other players and shouting off with his head or off with her head.
• 6:25
  Those whom she sentenced were taken into custody by the soldiers, who of course
• 6:30
  had to leave off being arches to do this, so that by the end
• 6:32
  of half an hour or so, there were no arches left, and all
• 6:35
  the players except the King, the Queen, and Alice were in custody and
• 6:41
  under sentence of execution. Then the Queen left off, quite out of breath,
• 6:46
  and said to Alice, have you seen the mock turtle yet? No,
• 6:50
  said Alice. I don't even know what a mock turtle is. It's
• 6:56
  the thing mock turtle soup is made from, said the Queen. I never
• 7:00
  saw one or heard of one, said Alice. Come on, then,
• 7:04
  said the Queen, and he shall tell you his history. As they walked
• 7:09
  off together, Alice heard the King say in a low voice to the company,
• 7:12
  generally you are all pardoned. Come that's a good thing, she said
• 7:16
  to herself, for she had felt quite unhappy at the number of executions the
• 7:20
  Queen had ordered. They very soon came upon a griffin lying fast asleep in
• 7:27
  the sun. If you don't know what a gryffin is, look at the
• 7:30
  picture. Up lazy thing, said the queen, and take this young lady
• 7:34
  to see the mock turtle and to hear his history. I must go back
• 7:39
  and see after some executions I have ordered, and she walked off, leaving
• 7:44
  Alice alone with the gryffin. Alice did not quite like the look of the
• 7:47
  creature, but on the whole she thought it would be quite as safe to
• 7:50
  stay with it as to go after that savage queen. So she waited.
• 7:57
  The griffin sat up and rubbed its eyes. Then it watched the queen till
• 8:00
  she was out of sight. Then it chuckled. What fun, said the
• 8:03
  griffin, half to itself after Alice. What is the fun? Said Alice?
• 8:09
  Why, she said the griffin. It's all her fancy that they never
• 8:13
  execute nobody, you know, Come on, everybody says, come on here,
• 8:18
  thought Alice, as she went slowly after it. I never was so
• 8:22
  ordered about in all my life. Never. They had not gone far before
• 8:26
  they saw the mock turtle in the distance, sitting sad and lonely on a
• 8:31
  little ledge of rock. And as they came nearer, Alice could hear him
• 8:35
  sighing as if his heart would break. She pitied him deeply. What is
• 8:39
  his sorrow, she asked the griffin, and the gryffin answered, very nearly
• 8:45
  in the same words as before. It's all his fancy that he hasn't got
• 8:50
  no sorrow, you know. Come on, So they went up to the
• 8:54
  mock turtle, who looked at them with large eyes full of tears, but
• 8:58
  said nothing. This here, young lady, said the griffin. She wants
• 9:03
  for to know your history. She do, I'll tell it her, said
• 9:07
  the mock turtle in a deep, hollow tone. Sit down, both of
• 9:11
  you, and don't speak a word till I've finished. So they sat down
• 9:16
  and nobody spoke for some minutes. Alice thought to herself, I don't see
• 9:20
  how he can even finish if he doesn't begin, but she waited patiently.
• 9:24
  Once said the mock turtle at last, with a deep sigh, I was
• 9:30
  a real turtle. These words were followed by a very long silence, broken
• 9:35
  only by an occasional exclamation of hump from the griffin and the constant heavy sobbing
• 9:41
  of the mock turtle. Alice was very nearly getting up and saying, thank
• 9:46
  you, sir for your interesting story. But she could not help thinking there
• 9:52
  must be more to come, so she sat still and said nothing. When
• 9:58
  we were little, the mock turtle went on at last, more calmly,
• 10:01
  though still sobbing a little now. And then we went to school in the
• 10:05
  sea. The master was an old turtle. We used to call him tortoise.
• 10:11
  Why did you call him tortoise if he wasn't one, Alice asked.
• 10:16
  We called him tortoise because he taughtis, said the mock turtle angrily. Really
• 10:22
  you are very dull. You ought to be ashamed of yourself for asking such
• 10:26
  a simple question, added the griffin, And then they both sat silent and
• 10:31
  looked at poor Alice, who felt ready to sink into the earth. At
• 10:35
  last, the griffin said to the mock turtle, drive on, old fellow,
• 10:39
  don't be all day about it. And he went on in these words,
• 10:45
  Yes, we went to school in the sea, though you mayn't believe
• 10:48
  it. I never said I didn't, interrupted Alice. You did, said
• 10:54
  the mock turtle. Hold your tongue, added the griffin. Before Alice could
• 10:58
  speak again, the mock turtle went on, we had the best of educations.
• 11:05
  In fact, we went to school every day. I've been to a
• 11:09
  day school too, said Alice. You needn't be so proud as all that
• 11:13
  with extras, asked the mock turtle, a little anxiously, Yes, said
• 11:18
  Alice. We learned French and music and washing, said the mock turtle.
• 11:26
  Certainly not, said Alice indignantly. Ah, then yours wasn't a really good
• 11:31
  school, said the mock turtle in a tone of great relief. Now at
• 11:37
  hours they had at the end of the bill, French, music and washing
• 11:43
  extra. You couldn't have wanted it much, said Alice, living at the
• 11:48
  bottom of the sea. I couldn't afford to learn it, said the mock
• 11:54
  turtle with a sigh. I only took the regular course. What was that,
• 12:00
  inquired Alice. Reeling and writhing, Of course to begin with, the
• 12:05
  mock turtle replied, and then the different branches of arithmetic, ambition, distraction,
• 12:13
  uglification, and derision. I never heard of uglification, Alice ventured to
• 12:20
  say, what is it? The griffin lifted up both its paws and surprise,
• 12:24
  what never heard of uglifying? It exclaimed? You know what to beautify?
• 12:31
  Is? I suppose yes, said Alice, doubtfully, it means to
• 12:37
  make anything prettier. Well, then the griffin went on, if you don't
• 12:43
  know what to uglify is, you are a simpleton. Alice did not feel
• 12:48
  encouraged to ask any more questions about it, so she turned to the mock
• 12:52
  turtle and said, what else had you to learn? Well? There was
• 12:56
  mystery, the mock turtle reply, counting off the subjects on his flappers.
• 13:03
  Mystery ancient and modern, with seography, then drawling. The drawling master was
• 13:09
  an old conger eel that used to come once a week. He taught us
• 13:15
  drawling, stretching and fainting in coils. What was that like? Said Alice.
• 13:22
  Well, I can't show it you myself. The mock turtle said,
• 13:26
  I'm too stiff. And the gryffin never learnt it had in time, said
• 13:31
  the Gryffin. I went to the classics master, though he was an old
• 13:35
  crab he was, I never went to him, the mock turtle said,
• 13:39
  with a sigh. He taught laughing in grief. They used to say,
• 13:45
  so he did, so he did, said the griffin, sighing in his
• 13:48
  turn, and both creatures hid their faces in their paws. And how many
• 13:54
  hours a day did you do lessons? Said Alice, in a hurry to
• 13:58
  change the subject. Ten hours the first day, said the mock turtle,
• 14:03
  nine the next, and so on. What a curious plan, exclaimed Alice.
• 14:09
  That's the reason they are called lessons, the griffin remarked, because they
• 14:13
  lessen from day to day. This was quite a new idea to Alice,
• 14:18
  and she thought it over a little before she made her next remark. Then
• 14:22
  the eleventh day must have been a holiday, of course, it was,
• 14:26
  said the mock turtle. And how did you manage on the twelfth? Alice
• 14:31
  went on eagerly. That's enough about lessons, the griffin interrupted, in a
• 14:37
  very decided tone. Tell her something about the games now. End of chapter nine.