Latest / Movie Meltdown / 87.2: Kevlar Pillows in the Philippines

Transcript

87.2: Kevlar Pillows in the Philippines · Movie Meltdown

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: The following feature has been rated R by the Motion
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: and parental discretion is advised.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Enjoy the show.
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: Hey, this is Graham Elwood, and you're listening to Movie Meltdown.
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: Pawn shot first. It's time for Sofa Theater.
• 0:47
  Speaker 4: If it would help, Gregorius, I would be happy to
• 0:49
  Speaker 4: speak to his employer. But you can reassure him that
• 0:53
  Speaker 4: liver is a liver, and that lungs are lungs. Besides,
• 0:58
  Speaker 4: today is a happy day, and I don't want to.
• 1:00
  Speaker 5: Hear of any more problems.
• 1:02
  Speaker 4: That's what I pay you for.
• 1:05
  Speaker 6: I know, Doctor. However, business is business. And we have
• 1:11
  Speaker 6: one more matter to discuss. I think we have a
• 1:14
  Speaker 6: problem that concerns the Paulson donor. It seems as though
• 1:18
  Speaker 6: Lloyds of London will be obligated to pay an insurance
• 1:21
  Speaker 6: policy of $ 500, 000.
• 1:21
  Speaker 5: For a highlight player?
• 1:24
  Speaker 6: The world's top player. His salary was extraordinary. We haven't
• 1:29
  Speaker 6: got much time. We have to pay off the policy
• 1:32
  Speaker 6: within 90 days.
• 1:34
  Speaker 4: So they have to pay off it, as you concern us.
• 1:37
  Speaker 6: If that's so, Doctor, we have nothing to worry about. However,
• 1:41
  Speaker 6: our London people have informed me that Lloyds is sending
• 1:44
  Speaker 6: a man.
• 1:44
  Speaker 4: Ah, some invincible force.
• 1:47
  Speaker 5: A superman.
• 1:48
  Speaker 6: According to his dossier, he's a man that can be
• 1:51
  Speaker 6: dangerous to us.
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: Don't you realize by now, Gregorius, that no one man.
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: Is dangerous to us?
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: Welcome to Moving Up Down Sofa Theater. Once again, I
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: am Brian.
• 2:47
  Speaker 7: This is Roger.
• 2:47
  Speaker 5: I'm Joni. I am still Misty.
• 2:50
  Speaker 7: I'm Jay.
• 2:51
  Speaker 5: You sound confused.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 2:54
  Speaker 7: I can't get it out.
• 2:56
  Speaker 5: Marlena.
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: Confused by the reappearance of Marlena, who has joined us
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: for the movie now.
• 3:01
  Speaker 5: Her lucky day.
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: Just in time. Yes, you are lucky.
• 3:04
  Speaker 5: I was lucky. We told her at a time it
• 3:06
  Speaker 5: had Sid Hagen, and you know she would have been.
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: Here on time.
• 3:09
  Speaker 6: I know.
• 3:09
  Speaker 8: Actually, no, because all the other times when we have
• 3:12
  Speaker 8: gone to meet Sid Hagen in person, it was usually.
• 3:14
  Speaker 5: Me that made us late.
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: Something about you and Sid.
• 3:17
  Speaker 9: I know.
• 3:18
  Speaker 5: We have, you know, timing issues. I'm still trying to
• 3:24
  Speaker 5: defy the whole you thinking he's hot. I don't know. Yeah,
• 3:27
  Speaker 5: I'm like, sit, hang it all.
• 3:29
  Speaker 8: Only in that movie.
• 3:30
  Speaker 5: I don't know. You know, you thought he was hot
• 3:32
  Speaker 5: in Spider-Baby.
• 3:33
  Speaker 9: It's okay.
• 3:35
  Speaker 5: Not so much.
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: And on that note, let's welcome you back to the
• 3:40
  Speaker 3: third in the trilogy, the big grand finale, if you were,
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: of Greedo Bloody Greedo.
• 3:49
  Speaker 5: This is the only one of the film fest that
• 3:52
  Speaker 5: I apparently saw. So far, it's the best one out
• 3:55
  Speaker 5: of them.
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: It is. I specifically set it up to go out
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: on the high note here. So, yeah, this week's Sofa
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: Theater feature is Wonder Woman, a.k.a. The Deadly and the Beautiful.
• 4:09
  Speaker 5: Neither of which titles actually fits this movie. No. Yeah.
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: Maybe The Deadly and the Beautiful. Maybe The Deadly and
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: the Beautiful, but definitely.
• 4:16
  Speaker 9: Wonder Woman's a little off.
• 4:18
  Speaker 10: No, Wonder Woman's a pretty good description.
• 4:21
  Speaker 7: Because it made me wonder about the whole damn movie.
• 4:22
  Speaker 7: What the hell was going on?
• 4:23
  Speaker 6: The year is 1973.
• 4:23
  Speaker 7: Director Robert Vincent O'Neill.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: The also simplified IMDb plot.
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: An insurance investigator battles Dr. Sue and her sexy all-girl army.
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: There you go.
• 4:38
  Speaker 5: You're an insurance investigator?
• 4:40
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 4:41
  Speaker 7: No, not really.
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: Once again, they're kind of wrong. But we'll get to
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: that in a minute. But before that, it is time
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: for the, once again, the final round into... One for
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: the folks. So we will swing the door open here,
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: and I guess for our last little trip over to
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: the Maria section and... One more time, we'll hear what
• 4:59
  Speaker 3: she has to say about Wonder Woman.
• 5:01
  Speaker 11: Wonder Woman was interesting. I was in the Philippines three months.
• 5:05
  Speaker 11: Loved the culture, loved the temperature. Big typhoon at the
• 5:10
  Speaker 11: Intercontinental Hotel. I didn't like that so much because it
• 5:13
  Speaker 11: was 14 stories up, you know, with a bucket of
• 5:15
  Speaker 11: ice to get water.
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: And.
• 5:19
  Speaker 11: But it was a great film. We did ice sculptures
• 5:24
  Speaker 11: the size you wouldn't believe, you.
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: Know, tables. It was incredible.
• 5:30
  Speaker 11: Great director, Bob O'Neill did that, and Nancy Kwan said everything,
• 5:37
  Speaker 11: and I had a lot of action to do.
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: I did a lot of running.
• 5:40
  Speaker 11: Ross Hagen was my co-star. Male co-star and a lot.
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: Of pretty ladies in it.
• 5:48
  Speaker 5: And it's interesting.
• 5:50
  Speaker 11: A lot of good kung fu fights. And, yeah, it
• 5:55
  Speaker 11: looks good. The money they spent is incredible.
• 5:59
  Speaker 5: Did she pull any of those moves on you?
• 6:01
  Speaker 9: Oh, yeah.
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: The flailing of her arms i wish and then flip
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: me across the room.
• 6:08
  Speaker 5: She wearing a super super short mini skirt when she
• 6:12
  Speaker 5: did any of this.
• 6:12
  Speaker 7: If you want to keep you off i don't know
• 6:14
  Speaker 7: i don't think.
• 6:14
  Speaker 8: She was wearing a mini skirt i think she was
• 6:16
  Speaker 8: just wearing a long man's t-shirt and then go-go boots
• 6:18
  Speaker 8: which is awesome.
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah it's pretty hot we might be spoiling it so
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: we'll throw the spoiler alert out right now yes well
• 6:25
  Speaker 3: if you didn't want to know about their fancy outfits
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: sorry about that But, yeah, once again, we'll attempt to
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: go into all this details here. Who knows what the
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: hell we'll come up with. So, yeah, with that, do
• 6:37
  Speaker 3: you want to start with the outfits?
• 6:38
  Speaker 5: They were fucking awesome. Yeah, they were pretty great.
• 6:41
  Speaker 8: I'm thinking, how do I get my hands on an
• 6:43
  Speaker 8: outfit such as this?
• 6:45
  Speaker 5: They look more like subdued, like flary versions of the
• 6:47
  Speaker 5: Star Trek uniforms. I love it, yeah.
• 6:50
  Speaker 8: I'm thinking I'm going to go to the Love Boutique
• 6:53
  Speaker 8: after this and look for some go-go boots.
• 6:56
  Speaker 5: I love go-go boots. I had a pair when I
• 6:58
  Speaker 5: was like nine. I don't know why they gave a
• 7:00
  Speaker 5: nine-year-old go-go boots.
• 7:02
  Speaker 3: That was training right there. Your life is laid out
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: before you.
• 7:06
  Speaker 5: A lot of things make sense now. My five-year-old cousin
• 7:08
  Speaker 5: had some poker boots already, so that's pretty exciting. She
• 7:10
  Speaker 5: wore them to church. My sister is the pastor. This
• 7:13
  Speaker 5: is after she went skinny dipping in the baptismal.
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: I think we see where this is all going.
• 7:21
  Speaker 5: This is awesome. I'm assuming my sister would never listen
• 7:25
  Speaker 5: to this, so I should be okay.
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: So, yeah, he wasn't quite an insurance investigator. Why was he?
• 7:32
  Speaker 3: He's hired by the insurance company. Basically, they start kidnapping
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: all these world-famous athletes. High-rise players?
• 7:42
  Speaker 12: Yeah.
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: It took me.
• 7:43
  Speaker 5: I didn't know what the hell was going on until, like,
• 7:45
  Speaker 5: the last ten minutes of the movie where they blatantly
• 7:47
  Speaker 5: spelled it out for me. I'm like, oh! Now I
• 7:50
  Speaker 5: get it.
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: See, like any good movie, you have to reveal your
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: plot in detail, and they just wait until pretty far
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: into the movie to go into that. But, um... Yeah,
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: in the beginning there's random kidnappings of sort of active people.
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: We'll call them athletes. How do you.
• 8:05
  Speaker 5: Pronounce that sport again?
• 8:06
  Speaker 7: High lie.
• 8:07
  Speaker 8: High lie.
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: High lie.
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: Polo and swimmists and what else?
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 8:12
  Speaker 5: Swimmists?
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: Swimmists.
• 8:13
  Speaker 12: Nice.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a term.
• 8:15
  Speaker 8: So only the sports that no one really cares about.
• 8:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, basically. No, there was basketball. Basketball is popular.
• 8:21
  Speaker 5: Yeah, the guy with the bucket on his head.
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: That was a different basketball player. We'll get to him.
• 8:26
  Speaker 5: Maybe those sports are really popular over there.
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: That's true.
• 8:29
  Speaker 12: I remember playing highline when I was like six in gym.
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: That's just me. It's bizarre.
• 8:37
  Speaker 5: You didn't have professional jarts players back then? God, jarts
• 8:40
  Speaker 5: is fucking awesome. Jarts?
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:43
  Speaker 6: Lawn darts.
• 8:44
  Speaker 7: Lawn darts.
• 8:45
  Speaker 5: Implements of death? You don't remember that? No, I remember.
• 8:47
  Speaker 10: I actually have a box of them for sale.
• 8:49
  Speaker 5: I just never heard of them.
• 8:51
  Speaker 10: At the new Peddler's Mall on Bardstown Road. Still in
• 8:54
  Speaker 10: the box.
• 8:55
  Speaker 12: My parents used to play Wasted.
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: I'm lucky I'm alive.
• 9:01
  Speaker 7: We used to play Dark Chicken as a kid.
• 9:03
  Speaker 13: You'd stand in a circle and throw the dart up.
• 9:06
  Speaker 7: And as it was coming down, whoever ran first was
• 9:09
  Speaker 7: the chicken. Who are the smarter?
• 9:11
  Speaker 5: I think maybe you and my brother played.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: The same game.
• 9:14
  Speaker 7: Amazingly enough, none of us died.
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: I'm still scared.
• 9:17
  Speaker 5: So people always put me in the circle and say, hey,
• 9:19
  Speaker 5: let's see how that goes.
• 9:20
  Speaker 7: We also had a movie called Wars.
• 9:22
  Speaker 3: The fact that any kid survived that decade is frightening.
• 9:27
  Speaker 5: Alright, Wonder Woman.
• 9:28
  Speaker 6: Wow.
• 9:28
  Speaker 12: Sometimes this movie got made, though, is people like that
• 9:33
  Speaker 12: from their younger childhood lives, and now.
• 9:36
  Speaker 5: And they're cockfighting. And here we go, and they're cockfighting, yes.
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: Well, I guess at this point we should mention that
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: this is all in the Philippines where this is going on,
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: so there's a whole new set of rules that come
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: into play.
• 9:47
  Speaker 7: No chickens were harmed in the making of this film.
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: Oh, no, I'm pretty sure.
• 9:50
  Speaker 5: I underestimated her.
• 9:51
  Speaker 12: For sure, at the end of the credits, all animals
• 9:53
  Speaker 12: were harmed in making this film.
• 9:55
  Speaker 5: Yeah, pretty much. Someone fucking ran that one chicken over.
• 9:57
  Speaker 7: So the cocks got hurt pretty bad.
• 9:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no cocks were harmed in the fighting of, oh
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: no way.
• 10:01
  Speaker 5: There were many, many cock injuries in this movie.
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: That may be, yes, definitely. That may be one of
• 10:07
  Speaker 3: the reasons that this is not in print anymore. I'm
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: trying to decide if that's enough to keep it out
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: of this country.
• 10:11
  Speaker 6: Probably.
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: Because there's just a blatant cock fight scene and you
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: pretty much watch one die.
• 10:15
  Speaker 5: There's a guy getting hit by a damn car.
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: Well, yeah. But that's a human. Nobody cares about humans.
• 10:19
  Speaker 3: They're annoying. They're annoying.
• 10:19
  Speaker 5: The bird that gets shot with a little slingshot. You
• 10:22
  Speaker 5: know that one, Faith.
• 10:24
  Speaker 3: No, it's the Philippines.
• 10:25
  Speaker 5: Not even the feather flying up after he fell.
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: It's the Philippines. That guy getting run over by the
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: car wasn't fake.
• 10:33
  Speaker 5: He's a bystander. He just happened to be in the
• 10:34
  Speaker 5: wrong place. I was thinking through that scene.
• 10:38
  Speaker 12: I was like, I wonder if they even told anybody
• 10:39
  Speaker 12: they were filming.
• 10:41
  Speaker 5: This is probably all real.
• 10:43
  Speaker 7: Probably not.
• 10:45
  Speaker 8: I have a friend who spent a lot of time
• 10:46
  Speaker 8: in Korea and he was saying like in America, you
• 10:49
  Speaker 8: pull up to a stoplight, you make eye contact with
• 10:51
  Speaker 8: the person in the car beside you, you know, they're
• 10:54
  Speaker 8: not going to drive it like right in front of
• 10:56
  Speaker 8: your car. As soon as light turns green, he's like,
• 10:58
  Speaker 8: you don't have that assurance. And you know, he's like,
• 11:02
  Speaker 8: you know, they're going to like, just run into the
• 11:04
  Speaker 8: side of your car.
• 11:05
  Speaker 5: Terrible. Wow.
• 11:09
  Speaker 14: So yeah, we, we get into a, there's a good
• 11:12
  Speaker 14: portion of this movie where you probably, unless you've, heard
• 11:15
  Speaker 14: a good amount about it or I don't know that's
• 11:18
  Speaker 14: probably about the only way that you're probably not lost
• 11:20
  Speaker 14: because even yeah even kind of trying to follow it
• 11:24
  Speaker 14: this time it does go a good amount of time
• 11:26
  Speaker 14: before really spelling out what's going on I.
• 11:29
  Speaker 5: Was dreadfully confused for the first 20.
• 11:30
  Speaker 3: Minutes yeah it's a good 20-30 minutes I told.
• 11:34
  Speaker 5: Marlena she wouldn't miss anything it just started I'm pretty
• 11:37
  Speaker 5: sure you won't miss anything and by the time she
• 11:39
  Speaker 5: got here I still had no idea what the hell.
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: Was going on So we get through all the kidnappings
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: and then we sort of meet the doctor, which she's
• 11:48
  Speaker 3: actually pretty cool.
• 11:49
  Speaker 5: Way cool. It's her brain sex.
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: Raise the brainwave cycles from theta to alpha and restore
• 11:54
  Speaker 4: them to consciousness.
• 11:55
  Speaker 6: I want them sent to you tonight.
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: It's the second time this week, Vera.
• 11:59
  Speaker 13: You should show more restraint.
• 12:02
  Speaker 4: Your old-fashioned way of sex runs the risk of involving
• 12:05
  Speaker 4: the emotions and revealing weakness.
• 12:07
  Speaker 5: With your permission, doctor, I think I speak for all
• 12:10
  Speaker 5: of us. Brain sex may work for you. but some
• 12:14
  Speaker 5: of us still prefer physical contact.
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: There will come a time when physical contact will be
• 12:19
  Speaker 4: unheard of. Brain sex enables you to experience the ultimate
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: in physical sensation and eliminate emotional disorders.
• 12:27
  Speaker 5: I want to have brain sex. I do too. It
• 12:30
  Speaker 5: reminds me of, oh, what was that movie?
• 12:33
  Speaker 7: Demolition Man.
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: See, I was thinking that. They borrow quite a bit
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: in Demolition Man from this movie, I'm pretty sure.
• 12:39
  Speaker 6: Mm-hmm.
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: But yeah, her name is Nancy Kwan, which she is
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: the reason, usually, especially back in the day, people were
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: sort of shocked that she was in this, because she's
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: actually kind of a name, at least at this point.
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: She steadily went downhill as time went on, but when
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: she came into it, she's the lead in Flower Drum
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: Song and The World of Suzy Wong, which both were
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: pretty big, and one of them's Rodgers and Hammerstein, so
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: in a very different genre, anyway. She's, yeah, she was
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: kind of a big deal at that time, so... Ten
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: plus years later, she's in this crazy drive-in movie as,
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: you know, she's basically the female Dr. No for all
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: practical purposes here. So, yeah, we enter into her and
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: she has found a way, which is funny that we
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: brought this up earlier. She's found a way to basically
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: let people stay young forever as long as they pay money.
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: So it's. Not necessarily the most original plot line there. Well,
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: that and harvest organs, too.
• 13:36
  Speaker 13: She does transplant somebody's eyes into somebody else.
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: Which, again, is something they keep stealing in these type
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: of movies over and over again. Which, again, it's okay
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: because it's awesome.
• 13:46
  Speaker 6: I know.
• 13:46
  Speaker 8: I love movies about organ snatching.
• 13:49
  Speaker 5: Well, you ain't got to worry about nobody taking your eyes,
• 13:50
  Speaker 5: so you're all true.
• 13:51
  Speaker 15: Yeah, really.
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: They're going to be fucked. Oh, man. So, yeah, she's
• 13:57
  Speaker 3: got her right-hand man, who is Mr. Sid Haig.
• 13:59
  Speaker 5: Awesome.
• 14:00
  Speaker 7: And his ruffly shirt.
• 14:02
  Speaker 5: Oh, my God. That was awesome.
• 14:05
  Speaker 8: Okay, only for like five seconds I thought he was hot.
• 14:09
  Speaker 5: Before you saw the bald spot?
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 14:12
  Speaker 5: That was pretty good.
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: Whatever, he's got a pimp cane. Dude, is it freaking cool?
• 14:16
  Speaker 5: He's got craters in his face where you can hide
• 14:18
  Speaker 5: your keys.
• 14:19
  Speaker 6: And?
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: Craters in his face.
• 14:21
  Speaker 5: Only from far away.
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: That's character, man.
• 14:23
  Speaker 5: It was a mustache. Is he a complete Monet? He
• 14:26
  Speaker 5: is a Monet. It was a mustache. I see, yeah.
• 14:29
  Speaker 5: I was digging on the mustache.
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: I am not a mustache fan. He does have that
• 14:33
  Speaker 3: cool 70s mustache.
• 14:34
  Speaker 9: Going on there.
• 14:34
  Speaker 7: He's got a Super Mario mustache.
• 14:35
  Speaker 5: One of the many, many reasons I started dating Asian
• 14:37
  Speaker 5: in the first place.
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: Because they're known for their intense facial hair.
• 14:42
  Speaker 5: Not so much.
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: They're good.
• 14:44
  Speaker 7: I could grow a mustache. It would just take a
• 14:45
  Speaker 7: really long time.
• 14:47
  Speaker 5: It'd be in spots.
• 14:49
  Speaker 7: No, the mustache shows up.
• 14:51
  Speaker 9: Oh, God.
• 14:51
  Speaker 5: Does it connect with the goatee?
• 14:53
  Speaker 7: No, it just doesn't connect with the goatee.
• 14:55
  Speaker 5: You could get a Fu Manchu, though, right? I could.
• 14:57
  Speaker 7: Awesome.
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: Just to spite Misty, we're all going to try to
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: convince you of that.
• 15:04
  Speaker 5: Just remember, I'm the one you have to live with.
• 15:06
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 15:06
  Speaker 7: I wouldn't do that.
• 15:07
  Speaker 5: Because I would shave it in your sleep.
• 15:08
  Speaker 3: I know.
• 15:09
  Speaker 7: I saw a picture of me with a goatee the
• 15:11
  Speaker 7: other night.
• 15:11
  Speaker 5: I didn't like it.
• 15:12
  Speaker 7: Or not the goatee, the soul patch.
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's a bad idea.
• 15:17
  Speaker 5: Did you have on a beret?
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: No.
• 15:19
  Speaker 5: Oh. I dated a guy who had a cell patch once.
• 15:22
  Speaker 7: It wasn't my idea. It was somebody else's idea.
• 15:26
  Speaker 8: His nine-year-old son even made fun of him for it.
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: Oh, ouch. He was asking for it.
• 15:34
  Speaker 5: His kid was so much cooler than he was. Yeah,
• 15:37
  Speaker 5: there were many, many, many large mustaches in this movie.
• 15:40
  Speaker 5: I think almost every character except for the main character
• 15:43
  Speaker 5: had a mustache. Not just mustaches, but like.
• 15:47
  Speaker 8: Whoa, I want to take a time machine and go
• 15:50
  Speaker 8: back to the 70s and introduce these women to bikini waxes.
• 15:54
  Speaker 7: Oh, yeah.
• 15:54
  Speaker 5: So bad.
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: That's not a mustache.
• 15:56
  Speaker 9: Hold on.
• 15:56
  Speaker 5: I wore like a bush bald. It was strange and
• 16:00
  Speaker 5: frightening and disturbing. At first, I was like, does she
• 16:03
  Speaker 5: have a penis?
• 16:04
  Speaker 7: She was smuggling grapes.
• 16:09
  Speaker 13: I don't like that at all.
• 16:12
  Speaker 5: Nasty. It's a very small part of my pants. I
• 16:17
  Speaker 5: don't understand.
• 16:17
  Speaker 8: Did she have, like, a creepy, bulgy vagina?
• 16:21
  Speaker 3: Oh, you haven't seen the photo.
• 16:22
  Speaker 5: No, I haven't.
• 16:25
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 16:25
  Speaker 3: So, we'll get away from that.
• 16:28
  Speaker 5: That's what we're doing later. We'll blend that shit.
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sure she will be. So, yeah, at this point,
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: we enter in our hero character. If you want to
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: call him that.
• 16:37
  Speaker 7: He's very Joe Don Baker-esque.
• 16:40
  Speaker 3: That was a good call, by the way.
• 16:41
  Speaker 5: Maybe there's just something wrong with me, because I thought
• 16:43
  Speaker 5: that guy was kind of.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: Hot, too. There is something wrong with you.
• 16:46
  Speaker 5: You're like Tom Selleck.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: This guy's a douchebag.
• 16:50
  Speaker 5: No, he was so funny. He was hilarious. I love
• 16:53
  Speaker 5: that guy.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: See, he seemed to think he was funny. That's the problem.
• 16:56
  Speaker 5: He was smooth. He was oneself.
• 16:59
  Speaker 7: I'm trying to think of what else I've seen him in.
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: He's been in a ton of stuff. His name is
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: Ross Hagen. And you'll notice he's so heavily featured in
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: this movie, and they make him out to be such
• 17:12
  Speaker 3: a cool guy. Here's a shocker. He's the producer of
• 17:15
  Speaker 3: the movie as well.
• 17:16
  Speaker 6: Oh.
• 17:17
  Speaker 7: I'm going to be in this movie, and I'm going
• 17:18
  Speaker 7: to be a badass. He's a poor man's John Saxon
• 17:22
  Speaker 7: is what he is.
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: Well, see, I was thinking just plot-wise, he's basically your
• 17:26
  Speaker 3: bargain basement James Bond.
• 17:27
  Speaker 12: Oh, yeah.
• 17:28
  Speaker 3: I mean, this is so a wannabe James Bond movie,
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: but it's like the scraping the bottom of that barrel
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: to get this. Well, I mean, that's.
• 17:37
  Speaker 10: Kind of the character that John Saxon plays in the Dragon.
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: It's that kind of top secret agent, you know.
• 17:45
  Speaker 7: So that's kind of what this guy is.
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: In a way it's like a mixture of that and
• 17:49
  Speaker 3: Mitchell and Mitchell yeah yeah really or what's the other
• 17:52
  Speaker 3: one the other one where he goes to Italy.
• 17:53
  Speaker 13: Oh god I don't even know that one Mitchell goes
• 17:56
  Speaker 13: to Italy yeah.
• 17:57
  Speaker 3: It's is there a second Mitchell movie no it's him
• 18:00
  Speaker 3: but he's playing the exact same character oh it's ridiculous
• 18:04
  Speaker 3: so this feels a lot like that actually it's this
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: American very out of place but just being very pissed
• 18:09
  Speaker 3: off just being pissed off and kind of cocky about
• 18:11
  Speaker 3: everything the whole time and I'm like dude that's a.
• 18:13
  Speaker 13: Sawed off shotgun out of fucking nowhere yup Where did
• 18:18
  Speaker 13: that shotgun come from?
• 18:19
  Speaker 10: Where was he hiding that?
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: I think he had like a holster, but it was.
• 18:23
  Speaker 13: But you couldn't see it because it came out of
• 18:26
  Speaker 13: his jacket.
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: His fancy powder blue jacket.
• 18:30
  Speaker 5: I hated that jacket.
• 18:31
  Speaker 10: Yeah, it was like a shirt.
• 18:33
  Speaker 5: Like a dress, maybe?
• 18:34
  Speaker 7: Yeah, it was a shirt with a.
• 18:37
  Speaker 5: A belt?
• 18:37
  Speaker 7: Was that a belt? Whatever you tie it. It's like
• 18:39
  Speaker 7: a shirt robe. It was a shirt, but it was
• 18:42
  Speaker 7: a robe.
• 18:42
  Speaker 5: I wanted to punch him in his shirt. It was
• 18:44
  Speaker 5: really Maria's dress. He just put it on.
• 18:46
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 18:46
  Speaker 3: The wonders of the 70s.
• 18:48
  Speaker 10: No recoil from that sawed-off shotgun.
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what I was... Not that I was a
• 18:51
  Speaker 3: lot of those, but... I was trying to decide. I
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: was like, is that even a shotgun? Because that should be, like,
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: knocking his freaking arm.
• 18:57
  Speaker 9: Yeah, really.
• 18:58
  Speaker 7: But it's... Max didn't have a sawed-off shotgun.
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: It almost seemed like one of those... Your pirate guns.
• 19:03
  Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, when you were a kid.
• 19:05
  Speaker 3: When you dress up like a pirate. Yeah, they're like, here,
• 19:07
  Speaker 3: take this.
• 19:07
  Speaker 13: That was the one we always stuck the lame kid
• 19:10
  Speaker 13: with when we were, like, playing, you know, like, army
• 19:12
  Speaker 13: and stuff.
• 19:13
  Speaker 7: They're like, here, you get this gun. And they're like.
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: You get this buccaneer gun, loser.
• 19:17
  Speaker 12: I mean, they're getting thrown in your face when you're on.
• 19:22
  Speaker 5: Thank you for making me use the shitty gun.
• 19:24
  Speaker 8: Oh, man.
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: So, I don't know. I have issues with this guy, really.
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: I mean, he's funny within the context of this movie.
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: He actually kind of sells it. Like, I think if
• 19:32
  Speaker 3: it wasn't for his cheesiness, it would make this a
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: little harder to watch. But it's that... He's a jackass. Yeah,
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: it's that lame jackass attitude that... He's so American in
• 19:43
  Speaker 3: the middle of this other country that sort of, you know,
• 19:45
  Speaker 3: you have to go like, what a cocky bastard. All right,
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: I'm on board. Yeah. But it's funny. because he he
• 19:50
  Speaker 3: comes out like he's pretending to be smooth like it
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: really does fit this james bond mold of like you
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: actually watch like james bond and you're watching like connery
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: doing it and he's delivering these cheesy lines but he
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: does it so smooth that you're like all right that
• 20:02
  Speaker 3: was all right And you watch this guy doing it
• 20:05
  Speaker 3: so forced. He's just like... I like it.
• 20:07
  Speaker 5: He doesn't oil it up with anything.
• 20:09
  Speaker 3: No, it's just.
• 20:10
  Speaker 7: It's just kind of like, meh.
• 20:11
  Speaker 5: It's like sandpaper.
• 20:12
  Speaker 7: He has no suave-ness about him.
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: No, like, they bring him in at the end. His
• 20:16
  Speaker 3: charisma's on me. They're like, yeah, he knows he's trapped
• 20:18
  Speaker 3: and he's in trouble, and they're eating, and he's like, oh,
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: don't let me interrupt your meal, and... Join us. Oh,
• 20:23
  Speaker 3: I forgot my MasterCard. I'll be back later. And I'm
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: just like, no, these aren't going over, buddy. Just stop.
• 20:28
  Speaker 7: And then when he sits down, he starts to dig in.
• 20:30
  Speaker 3: Like, what are you doing?
• 20:32
  Speaker 5: He's probably starving after all.
• 20:33
  Speaker 12: That running and having sex and getting almost killed by
• 20:37
  Speaker 12: a girl.
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: Many, many times.
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: Many.
• 20:42
  Speaker 5: It's not often I meet a man like you. An
• 20:46
  Speaker 5: experience I can remember for the rest of my life.
• 20:52
  Speaker 5: I promise you.
• 20:56
  Speaker 3: I will.
• 20:58
  Speaker 6: You know, that's what I like about you, baby.
• 21:00
  Speaker 5: You're unpredictable. I am predictable about one thing. I never miss.
• 21:07
  Speaker 13: And I want to know, you know, those hotel pillows
• 21:10
  Speaker 13: are pretty damn hard.
• 21:11
  Speaker 5: You could deflect a bullet off a damn pillow.
• 21:14
  Speaker 7: But yet she threw him through the door.
• 21:16
  Speaker 5: I think she roundhouse kicked him through the door, actually.
• 21:20
  Speaker 7: Is that what it was?
• 21:20
  Speaker 10: I don't remember.
• 21:22
  Speaker 7: There was a lot of her putting him through a
• 21:24
  Speaker 7: lot of furniture.
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she wiped the whole room with him. She broke
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: every piece of furniture.
• 21:33
  Speaker 5: His face through the lampshade.
• 21:34
  Speaker 3: That was awesome. so yeah that that's the turning point
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: i mean the whole rest of it's just sort of
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: set up and you know you get your cheesy standard
• 21:43
  Speaker 3: characters we even get our cheesy um little uh what
• 21:46
  Speaker 3: do you even call that vehicle the the taxi cab driver.
• 21:49
  Speaker 7: It's like a little jeep with uh it's.
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah look jeep made almost but it's yeah a rickshaw No,
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: it's a taxi in Manila.
• 21:58
  Speaker 10: It's like a.
• 21:59
  Speaker 7: Jeep, and they've extended the back end of it. They've
• 22:02
  Speaker 7: made it all sparkly.
• 22:03
  Speaker 3: That's the thing. The decorations on these vehicles is kind
• 22:06
  Speaker 3: of awesome. It's tacky and completely audacious, and that's sort
• 22:10
  Speaker 3: of why I like them.
• 22:11
  Speaker 10: It's like that in a lot of Asian countries. Thailand
• 22:13
  Speaker 10: has those. They call them tuk-tuks.
• 22:15
  Speaker 7: They're little.
• 22:17
  Speaker 7: The front end's motorcycle.
• 22:19
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 22:19
  Speaker 3: They had a couple of those, yeah.
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: In Japan.
• 22:21
  Speaker 13: I mean, they got in, like, Japan, Vietnam. They all
• 22:24
  Speaker 13: have those things, and they're highly decorated.
• 22:27
  Speaker 3: Those are awesome.
• 22:28
  Speaker 10: They're, like, bedazzled.
• 22:29
  Speaker 16: Yeah, they are.
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: It's just covered in shit. But it's colorful, and it's fun.
• 22:35
  Speaker 5: They got chandelier hanging in the back.
• 22:36
  Speaker 8: Oh, yeah.
• 22:36
  Speaker 7: Falling everywhere.
• 22:37
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah.
• 22:38
  Speaker 7: Putting the Chicanos to shame.
• 22:39
  Speaker 5: Mm-hmm. Kind of odd. But they got fringe.
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: But none of those guys had a chain steering wheel.
• 22:47
  Speaker 13: Yeah, and none of them had the dancing disco people
• 22:51
  Speaker 13: on the dashboard.
• 22:51
  Speaker 3: Those were cool, yeah.
• 22:53
  Speaker 16: This is my Disney.
• 22:54
  Speaker 4: Sit down, sit down.
• 22:56
  Speaker 16: My name is Lapu Lapu.
• 22:57
  Speaker 5: I am the number one, the.
• 22:59
  Speaker 16: Finest, the bravest Disney.
• 23:01
  Speaker 7: Look, all I want is a blue cane.
• 23:04
  Speaker 5: You got it. We're going downtown.
• 23:07
  Speaker 17: Intercontinental Hotel.
• 23:09
  Speaker 5: I've taken the best scenic spots.
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: So, yeah, that's, I mean, that guy's pretty fun. I
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: kind of like him. Very stereotypical, but he's a fun guy.
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: You got to like him.
• 23:23
  Speaker 5: It's like he had nothing else to do. He's like, okay,
• 23:25
  Speaker 5: I'm just going to hang out with you all day.
• 23:26
  Speaker 5: You seem pretty interesting.
• 23:27
  Speaker 13: Generally, that's kind of what they do over there because, like,
• 23:30
  Speaker 13: you can go over there and you'll hire a taxi driver.
• 23:33
  Speaker 7: And pay them and they pretty much just stick with
• 23:35
  Speaker 7: you the entire time.
• 23:36
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: Let me think how many of those guys there are
• 23:39
  Speaker 3: versus tourists coming in. I mean, they really, and they're
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: probably fighting them for an American. Yeah.
• 23:43
  Speaker 13: So he's probably going to eat and then they're going
• 23:45
  Speaker 13: to be like, Oh yeah, give me a 20 bucks,
• 23:47
  Speaker 13: you know.
• 23:48
  Speaker 7: American guys like, Oh, that's a deal.
• 23:49
  Speaker 12: You know?
• 23:50
  Speaker 3: And he's like, I just made three months.
• 23:53
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: Sucker. So yeah, you can see that part's probably real.
• 23:58
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 23:59
  Speaker 3: But yeah, from then on, once we hit the fight scene,
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: it's pretty fun. I have to say, if you can
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: fast forward through the boring first 20 minutes or so,
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: once you hit the fight scene, all bets are off.
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: That fight scene is epically, awesomely bad.
• 24:14
  Speaker 7: And I like how it flows into one of the
• 24:15
  Speaker 7: longest chases.
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: In cinema history. Yep, that whole segment is awesome. It
• 24:20
  Speaker 3: goes with a wonderful hand-to-hand combat where, how would you
• 24:25
  Speaker 3: like to describe her kung fu style?
• 24:27
  Speaker 5: Like this.
• 24:28
  Speaker 3: A lot of open flailing.
• 24:30
  Speaker 7: Arms fingers in karate chop it's basically kind of like
• 24:36
  Speaker 7: hey uh we don't really know how to train our
• 24:38
  Speaker 7: people in karate so just kind of other movies like.
• 24:41
  Speaker 13: Yeah you know karate it's kind of like third graders.
• 24:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what I was thinking. It's kind of like
• 24:47
  Speaker 3: when you're little kids and you're pretending like, okay, we're
• 24:49
  Speaker 3: going to do Kung Fu now. And you just flail
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: your arms around a lot and you do the karate
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: flat hand and ha ha, chop.
• 24:56
  Speaker 5: She chops so many people.
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: She is a chopping queen.
• 25:00
  Speaker 12: Oh, oh, oh.
• 25:01
  Speaker 8: And when she pulled the little star out of her panties,
• 25:04
  Speaker 8: that was awesome.
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: It was like attached by the little thing. Yeah, fuck off.
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: But my favorite part is then she threw it like
• 25:12
  Speaker 3: a frisbee. She didn't throw it hard enough to do anything.
• 25:15
  Speaker 3: She just sort of frisbeed it over to him.
• 25:16
  Speaker 5: I'm going to start with Velcro when Shani starts to
• 25:18
  Speaker 5: wear pants.
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: You're going to stab yourself.
• 25:21
  Speaker 5: You're going to do it right now. You're going to
• 25:25
  Speaker 5: get stars in your pants right now.
• 25:31
  Speaker 13: You know, if you can injure yourself with a bike rack,
• 25:33
  Speaker 13: I think the last thing you need is a pointy
• 25:35
  Speaker 13: metal optic around your pants.
• 25:36
  Speaker 5: And she's not even pants.
• 25:39
  Speaker 3: Stars on their underwear, they are Wonder Women. Come on.
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: That's just a little too accurate there.
• 25:44
  Speaker 6: True.
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: So, yeah. But, yeah, that enters in. After she just
• 25:49
  Speaker 3: wipes the entire room with that dude, I mean, he
• 25:51
  Speaker 3: gets one or two shots in. Other than that, she
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: kicks his ass for, like, ten minutes.
• 25:55
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 25:56
  Speaker 3: Which is pretty awesome, actually, as she throws him through
• 25:58
  Speaker 3: every piece of breakaway furniture in the whole hotel.
• 26:01
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: Then, yeah, then it becomes he finds his sawed-off shotgun and,
• 26:05
  Speaker 3: you know, tries to take her out. So she starts running.
• 26:08
  Speaker 16: Wow.
• 26:08
  Speaker 3: The running begins. In heels. Yeah, she once again kicks
• 26:11
  Speaker 3: his ass because he can't catch her and she's in
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: heels the entire time. She runs like a gimp.
• 26:16
  Speaker 5: She runs like Steven Seagal.
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: But once again, Seagal cannot do it in heels. Maria.
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: This is Maria that has entered in here. She's sort
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: of our main female lead once the Once the little
• 26:26
  Speaker 3: interaction takes place, she comes in to seduce him and
• 26:29
  Speaker 3: then kill him, and then all of this unfurls.
• 26:32
  Speaker 13: The super chase scene where chickens get squashed, people get
• 26:36
  Speaker 13: pushed off of ledges and thrown through restaurants.
• 26:39
  Speaker 7: Oh, it's awesome.
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: And the best part is as they're running, and I'm
• 26:42
  Speaker 3: glad you guys... Question this, too, because it's so, like, huge,
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: but yet, like, nobody seems to pay attention, and then
• 26:48
  Speaker 3: it goes away. She's running down the street, and they
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: do this super, like, pan back, and they show you
• 26:54
  Speaker 3: the whole street, and then everybody starts running after her.
• 26:58
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 26:58
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, what? What's going on?
• 27:00
  Speaker 5: That's cool. I didn't believe they didn't tell anybody.
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: I don't think so. What the hell is going on?
• 27:04
  Speaker 5: Did she steal something? I think so.
• 27:06
  Speaker 3: This is great that they're stealing.
• 27:07
  Speaker 13: That's probably, there was probably a mistranslation and everybody started running.
• 27:11
  Speaker 7: They're like, cut, cut.
• 27:12
  Speaker 3: No, you're extras.
• 27:13
  Speaker 5: Don't run.
• 27:14
  Speaker 3: You're just supposed to stand there and buy fruit from
• 27:16
  Speaker 3: the market over there. Don't chase our lead. So yeah,
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: everybody in the entire street starts chasing our two people. Oh,
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: that part is hilarious. And I don't even get it,
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: but that's sort of what makes it a little better.
• 27:29
  Speaker 5: I like the part from the beginning where all the
• 27:32
  Speaker 5: women are looking.
• 27:33
  Speaker 12: At the men in the giant cryovac bags.
• 27:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 27:37
  Speaker 5: And they're like, yeah, he turns me on. Well, he
• 27:40
  Speaker 5: turns me on.
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: I'm like, what the?
• 27:43
  Speaker 7: There's a lot of mention of that throughout the movie,
• 27:46
  Speaker 7: how horny they are.
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: These girls like them some men. Luckily, they kidnap guys.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 27:52
  Speaker 3: But yeah, they kidnap him and then put him in
• 27:53
  Speaker 3: like Ziploc bags. I was thinking fresh. The setup she's
• 27:57
  Speaker 3: got is kind of like if you've seen the the
• 28:00
  Speaker 3: lair of comic book guy when he's got like Lucy
• 28:04
  Speaker 3: Lawless like in this little dome in his corner of
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: his room. It's kind of how this Dr. Seuss got
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: it going on.
• 28:09
  Speaker 12: Or like the blood bank from Blade 3? Was it 3?
• 28:14
  Speaker 7: One, two, three.
• 28:16
  Speaker 12: Yeah, because Jessica Biel's like, oh, God in heaven.
• 28:22
  Speaker 3: That's a direct quote.
• 28:24
  Speaker 17: There he is.
• 28:27
  Speaker 3: Uncanny.
• 28:28
  Speaker 5: Stupid Jessica Biel. With her big old ass.
• 28:30
  Speaker 8: Round stuff.
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: Yikes.
• 28:34
  Speaker 3: So.
• 28:35
  Speaker 5: It's just because I'm jealous.
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, so throwing people off the side of the
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: stairs there, that was awesome, because he probably could have
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: killed that guy.
• 28:45
  Speaker 5: He laid it in like a fruit stand?
• 28:46
  Speaker 7: No, he laid it in a pile of bra.
• 28:48
  Speaker 5: That's right, yeah.
• 28:50
  Speaker 7: And the kids around him were throwing the bra's at him.
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: They were like angry at him. I'm like, why do
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: you have like a mountain of bra's? It didn't even
• 28:59
  Speaker 3: look like they were selling them. It's like they were
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: underneath something. Like you were hiding a mountain of bras.
• 29:04
  Speaker 12: What the hell is that?
• 29:06
  Speaker 5: It was the lair of the Craigslist killer.
• 29:08
  Speaker 3: I think it was.
• 29:09
  Speaker 7: I didn't have a stunt cushion.
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: There's a lot of women in this country. Give us
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: all of your bras. Wonder women indeed.
• 29:19
  Speaker 5: Wonder Brawl Woman?
• 29:20
  Speaker 12: I'm a little upset that there's no invisible plane or
• 29:23
  Speaker 12: cuffs in.
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: This, though.
• 29:24
  Speaker 3: That's Wonder Woman.
• 29:26
  Speaker 7: Oh, oh.
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: Slightly. I mean, I'm sure this is probably why they
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: shouldn't have changed the name, because I'm sure that confused
• 29:33
  Speaker 3: people forever. like the when i first found out maria
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: was in this movie it kept bringing up like the
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: wonder woman two hour made for tv movie and like
• 29:41
  Speaker 3: it probably confused people from day one in this country
• 29:44
  Speaker 3: i guess you could play it around the rest of
• 29:45
  Speaker 3: the world however you want but yeah there's only one
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: wonder woman and everybody knows her and it's pretty well
• 29:51
  Speaker 3: known property so it's hard to uh Just pluralize it
• 29:54
  Speaker 3: and assume people aren't going to be mistaken.
• 29:56
  Speaker 8: That's probably why it's not on video more than.
• 29:59
  Speaker 5: Anything, I think.
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I would think they could at least
• 30:02
  Speaker 3: go with the original title and put it out.
• 30:04
  Speaker 5: I think it's the Hulk fight.
• 30:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah, probably. Or they just lost the rights somewhere along
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: the way and it's too much trouble.
• 30:10
  Speaker 5: Or nobody ever wanted to see this movie.
• 30:12
  Speaker 3: They should because it's awesome.
• 30:14
  Speaker 5: It is relatively awesome.
• 30:15
  Speaker 3: It's fucking awesome.
• 30:17
  Speaker 5: I'm pretty excited about it. It's my favorite so far.
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: I'm telling you, it's awesome.
• 30:20
  Speaker 2: I laughed, I cried.
• 30:23
  Speaker 5: I wanted to harvest human body parts.
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: Who doesn't want to do that?
• 30:27
  Speaker 8: Oh, man.
• 30:28
  Speaker 3: But I have to give him credit the shots, like
• 30:30
  Speaker 3: the whole street shot thing. I mean, it's ridiculous and
• 30:34
  Speaker 3: it's out of control, but at the same time, there's
• 30:36
  Speaker 3: a lot going on there.
• 30:37
  Speaker 5: That's just what it's like all the time.
• 30:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but I mean, just their shooting of it. It's
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: a hell of a ramped up version.
• 30:43
  Speaker 13: How did the gaffer not wander into the scene?
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: I did.
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: Seriously. There were no gaffers.
• 30:48
  Speaker 7: I just don't know.
• 30:49
  Speaker 5: There were no gaffers.
• 30:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah, there were no gaffers. There was like a nine-year-old boy.
• 30:53
  Speaker 3: He was like, here, hold this.
• 30:54
  Speaker 7: Do you want the best boy now?
• 30:56
  Speaker 3: Try not to let this light fall on people and
• 30:58
  Speaker 3: kill them. I just said try.
• 31:00
  Speaker 5: Did they have lighting in this movie?
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: Jesus Christ. They really did. I would say it's the
• 31:05
  Speaker 3: darkest movie I've seen, but last week. Last week beat everything.
• 31:10
  Speaker 3: For as choppily edited as this was, or even the
• 31:13
  Speaker 3: other movie she was in was pretty bad, but no,
• 31:15
  Speaker 3: The Cremators was about the worst. It sort of takes
• 31:18
  Speaker 3: the cake on editing and lighting. But I guess what
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: little credit we can give, you know, we'll give to
• 31:23
  Speaker 3: the director. Once again, it is Robert Vincent O'Neill, which
• 31:28
  Speaker 3: if you were really paying attention, because I had to
• 31:30
  Speaker 3: remind myself, he is the director of Blood Mania. That's
• 31:34
  Speaker 3: what I thought. Yeah. So we have to... I mean,
• 31:37
  Speaker 3: compared to those, this is his next movie. So within
• 31:40
  Speaker 3: a three-year span, he went from doing.
• 31:41
  Speaker 4: Really?
• 31:41
  Speaker 7: Jumped his game?
• 31:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah. From Blood Mania, which is basically just they rented
• 31:45
  Speaker 3: a house, and that's it. I mean, he got a
• 31:48
  Speaker 3: few decent shots here and there, but it's a pretty
• 31:51
  Speaker 3: low-tech movie. It's just sit the camera there and have
• 31:54
  Speaker 3: people talk over there. Where this one, I mean, he's got...
• 31:57
  Speaker 3: gunfights and explosions and car chases and people flying through
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: windows and I mean it's yeah this is a huge
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: undertaking compared to that last movie so I give him
• 32:07
  Speaker 3: credit for just ramping it up quite a bit from
• 32:10
  Speaker 3: one movie to the next because this is a hell
• 32:12
  Speaker 3: of a lot more uh and ridiculously over-the-top ambitious movie.
• 32:18
  Speaker 12: What was with the quote-unquote blind guy who apparently ditched
• 32:22
  Speaker 12: Vietnam War and was like, I'm over here because.
• 32:24
  Speaker 5: I don't want to get my number pulled out of
• 32:25
  Speaker 5: a hat.
• 32:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, damn hippies.
• 32:28
  Speaker 5: But then that one scene where he sank....
• 32:31
  Speaker 7: What the fuck was that?
• 32:33
  Speaker 5: Was that supposed to happen? I guess maybe he was
• 32:35
  Speaker 5: just trying not to be blind.
• 32:37
  Speaker 7: Yeah, maybe that's what it was.
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: He was like, I'm not here. Don't see me. I'm blind.
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: You don't see me. Wait, that's not how it works.
• 32:44
  Speaker 5: I'm blind. Anyway, my favorite part where he was trying
• 32:49
  Speaker 5: to come on to the girl and he said he
• 32:50
  Speaker 5: didn't like her legs because they were too long. Yeah,
• 32:52
  Speaker 5: that was his first line. It was like, 40 too long.
• 32:55
  Speaker 3: Hey, it works.
• 32:56
  Speaker 12: I don't like a girl with long legs.
• 32:58
  Speaker 3: He likes the paraplegic. He likes the stumpy cheeks. Yeah,
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: they get in the way. Which she had the best
• 33:04
  Speaker 3: retort ever. She was like, let me see what I
• 33:05
  Speaker 3: can do to get them out of the way.
• 33:07
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 33:08
  Speaker 3: I'm using that one.
• 33:09
  Speaker 5: I think she had a little retort first, and he
• 33:11
  Speaker 5: was like, how can we make this in the release?
• 33:13
  Speaker 5: It's on the writer, whatever it was.
• 33:16
  Speaker 3: Pretty dork.
• 33:18
  Speaker 6: So, yeah.
• 33:20
  Speaker 3: It obviously worked because, you know, cut to the next shot.
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: He's not even nailing it. He's just waking up. He
• 33:26
  Speaker 3: was done already.
• 33:27
  Speaker 12: Still had his whiskey glass in his hand.
• 33:31
  Speaker 7: And he's just sitting there like the smug jerk that.
• 33:34
  Speaker 3: He is going, yeah, that was the best you ever had.
• 33:37
  Speaker 3: I rocked your world, baby. He's like Troy McClure. Hey,
• 33:43
  Speaker 3: you know you.
• 33:43
  Speaker 15: Want to do it again.
• 33:44
  Speaker 5: You remember me from such human smuggling ads.
• 33:48
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 33:49
  Speaker 5: If she would have just fucking shot him instead of
• 33:51
  Speaker 5: being like, oh, I'm going to shoot you. Maybe she
• 33:53
  Speaker 5: wouldn't have had time to grab the super deflected pillow.
• 33:57
  Speaker 7: They starched the hell out of that fucking pillow.
• 34:00
  Speaker 3: What sort of crazy action movie would it be if
• 34:01
  Speaker 3: you didn't announce what you're about to do next?
• 34:03
  Speaker 15: Exactly.
• 34:05
  Speaker 10: Guns always screw up.
• 34:08
  Speaker 3: Well, it was a great lay. Now I'm going to
• 34:10
  Speaker 3: tell you about it a little bit more while I
• 34:11
  Speaker 3: pull my gun out. And then I'll remember you forever. Oh,
• 34:15
  Speaker 3: fucking pillow.
• 34:16
  Speaker 15: So, yeah.
• 34:18
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Goddamn Kevlar pillows. I mean, if villains would just
• 34:22
  Speaker 5: realize it. I can't follow that one.
• 34:28
  Speaker 3: Kevlar pillows in the Philippines. They don't mess around there, man.
• 34:32
  Speaker 5: Really hard to smother people with, though.
• 34:34
  Speaker 3: You just beat them. That's the best pillow fight ever.
• 34:39
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 34:44
  Speaker 12: I just imagine two seven-year-old girls like let's have a pillow.
• 34:48
  Speaker 5: Fight her neck breaks.
• 34:51
  Speaker 3: That did remind me in his last feature he had
• 34:54
  Speaker 3: a medieval pillow fight so maybe he's just got a
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: weird thing for pillow fights what a weirdo Oh, Lord.
• 35:03
  Speaker 3: So I guess we can, you know, that's probably the
• 35:05
  Speaker 3: most awesome part there. The fight slash chase scene is
• 35:08
  Speaker 3: pretty awesome. But what rivals it is then when we
• 35:11
  Speaker 3: get to the island, because Dr. Sue has her own island,
• 35:14
  Speaker 3: as any self-respecting evil genius would have. So, yeah, she's, which,
• 35:20
  Speaker 3: this is something that I think I'm overthinking it, but
• 35:23
  Speaker 3: why does she have an all-girl army? other than it's
• 35:25
  Speaker 3: hot and they get to wear those outfits. But I
• 35:28
  Speaker 3: was like waiting for her to come up with some
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: sort of like master plan of, and then the master
• 35:32
  Speaker 3: race of women will take over the world. I don't know.
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: I thought maybe there was a reason or she can't
• 35:36
  Speaker 3: trust men, I guess. But then if that's, if that's
• 35:38
  Speaker 3: the case, why is a right hand man, a man,
• 35:41
  Speaker 3: you know, Because he's.
• 35:42
  Speaker 7: The only man that she could trust.
• 35:46
  Speaker 3: I mean, he really is the only man on the
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: entire island. But they never really address that. It's like,
• 35:51
  Speaker 3: why is that? Or they don't follow it up with
• 35:54
  Speaker 3: some sort of crazy backstory.
• 35:55
  Speaker 7: She says she has no need for physical sex.
• 35:58
  Speaker 3: That's true.
• 35:58
  Speaker 5: She feels like it's easier to control women.
• 36:02
  Speaker 8: Well, I'm sure a man broke her heart really fast
• 36:04
  Speaker 8: this time. and she just never got over it. Never
• 36:07
  Speaker 8: trusts our love again.
• 36:08
  Speaker 3: And that's the scene we're missing in this movie. Our
• 36:11
  Speaker 3: lead should have played that. He's like, well, I know
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: what your problem really is. And then cut to him
• 36:16
  Speaker 3: with his drink and passed out again. They really should
• 36:19
  Speaker 3: have worked that in there. She changes her mind.
• 36:21
  Speaker 5: She's like, I think I want to have a pony farm.
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: She was like, now I know why I've got all
• 36:26
  Speaker 3: these women here. What?
• 36:27
  Speaker 5: Women get shit done right the first time. You have
• 36:30
  Speaker 5: a bunch of men around. They're going to fuck something up.
• 36:33
  Speaker 3: That's an option.
• 36:33
  Speaker 5: They're not going to listen. They're going to be laying around.
• 36:37
  Speaker 12: Hold on.
• 36:38
  Speaker 5: I'm playing NBA.
• 36:41
  Speaker 3: Exactly.
• 36:41
  Speaker 5: I'm the blonde right now.
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: Dude, ever since we got Xbox, nothing on this island
• 36:46
  Speaker 3: gets done.
• 36:47
  Speaker 7: Yeah, no shit.
• 36:49
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 36:50
  Speaker 8: I don't know.
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: The island's pretty fun, though, because then we get into...
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: She sits him down and gives him the entire speech.
• 36:55
  Speaker 5: And some brain sex.
• 36:56
  Speaker 3: And some brain sex, yeah. We get into the... The
• 36:59
  Speaker 3: master plot. Yeah, the super master plot, and.
• 37:03
  Speaker 7: digging it he seems like they're walking around and he's
• 37:05
  Speaker 7: almost like.
• 37:05
  Speaker 3: On board yeah i figured he'd be like where do
• 37:07
  Speaker 3: i sign up yeah seriously do i get one of
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: them fancy little mini skirt outfits that's my that's.
• 37:15
  Speaker 12: Like yeah that's when.
• 37:17
  Speaker 3: It fully ramps it up and.
• 37:20
  Speaker 7: She even tells him she's gonna turn him and she's
• 37:22
  Speaker 7: gonna harvest his.
• 37:23
  Speaker 3: Organs he's like hey cool he's like well this is
• 37:25
  Speaker 3: a good operation you've got going here you.
• 37:28
  Speaker 10: Mean to tell me these things still work.
• 37:31
  Speaker 4: We will, when transplanted properly.
• 37:34
  Speaker 5: All these organs are functioning.
• 37:36
  Speaker 4: With the discovery of my anti-rejection serum, it was possible
• 37:40
  Speaker 4: for me to develop a preserving solution.
• 37:43
  Speaker 5: That's incredible.
• 37:45
  Speaker 4: Incredibility is the matter of exposure and conditioning.
• 37:50
  Speaker 5: A few years ago.
• 37:51
  Speaker 4: An interplanetary flight was considered incredible. But now, it's a
• 37:56
  Speaker 4: simple matter of fact.
• 37:58
  Speaker 5: Such as this.
• 38:01
  Speaker 4: But no, once again, I didn't think this movie could
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: get any cooler and more ridiculous.
• 38:07
  Speaker 7: Than she busts.
• 38:09
  Speaker 6: Out the little cavalcade of her past mistakes.
• 38:26
  Speaker 3: And sadly, I had to start naming him.
• 38:28
  Speaker 5: Hold on.
• 38:28
  Speaker 3: In our usual ridiculous names for things. Buckethead. No, no.
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: Because to me, he's got an even better option going on. First,
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: we get to No-Face. He's got like one giant eye
• 38:38
  Speaker 3: and no face. Then there's just Mongoloid. He's a Mongoloid
• 38:41
  Speaker 3: if ever there was one. goliath whatever they're more self-descriptive
• 38:46
  Speaker 3: so yeah the no face mongoloid monkey face she's just
• 38:50
  Speaker 3: asking for it she.
• 38:51
  Speaker 12: Was like she was my first i loved her but
• 38:54
  Speaker 12: i put a monkey brain.
• 38:56
  Speaker 3: And then it made her draw a monkey face it's
• 38:59
  Speaker 3: like what's that got to do with her big mouth
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: that looks like a monkey yeah weirdo but yeah our
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: favorite and i decided he needed to be named cake
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: dome because the top of his head looks like the
• 39:09
  Speaker 3: big clear dome that you put over your cake so
• 39:11
  Speaker 3: you don't get.
• 39:12
  Speaker 5: It messed up i don't know only it was over.
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: His brain well yeah but it was clear yeah it's
• 39:18
  Speaker 3: a clear kfc.
• 39:19
  Speaker 13: Bucket slash kfc of the future yeah it's got lights.
• 39:23
  Speaker 3: So he's like buckethead he plays ripping guitar Uh-huh. So, yeah,
• 39:28
  Speaker 3: that was the basketball player. He even knew him. He
• 39:30
  Speaker 3: was a famous freak. Everybody knew him back in the day,
• 39:34
  Speaker 3: but now he's just a cake-dome, bucket-headed freak.
• 39:38
  Speaker 5: Who apparently likes to steal women.
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah.
• 39:41
  Speaker 5: It's all basketball players.
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: But even more awesome.
• 39:43
  Speaker 5: They're all rapists.
• 39:45
  Speaker 14: Whoa.
• 39:46
  Speaker 3: Allegedly.
• 39:47
  Speaker 7: Alleged.
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: Alleged rapist. I have no say in that.
• 39:52
  Speaker 5: All of them except for Larry Bird.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that.
• 39:54
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 39:56
  Speaker 5: Travis Ford.
• 39:56
  Speaker 3: That crack I ain't getting no women. Regardless.
• 39:59
  Speaker 5: I would totally see the Larry Bird. The original inventor
• 40:03
  Speaker 5: of the slam dunk.
• 40:07
  Speaker 8: Wow.
• 40:07
  Speaker 5: Circa like 86.
• 40:08
  Speaker 3: Mind you, I was a fetus then. Like the McDonald's
• 40:12
  Speaker 3: commercials era. That's the way you like them.
• 40:15
  Speaker 10: Poor old Larry Bird.
• 40:16
  Speaker 7: Nobody wanted his converses.
• 40:18
  Speaker 5: No.
• 40:20
  Speaker 3: Dorky white boy. Nobody wants your shoes.
• 40:22
  Speaker 5: Go play for the Celtics.
• 40:24
  Speaker 3: Go shoot a three-pointer.
• 40:27
  Speaker 9: Oh, Lord.
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: So, yeah. But to me, that's the best part, is
• 40:30
  Speaker 3: not only do they let these monsters loose eventually, but
• 40:34
  Speaker 3: they all have their own little walk.
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: They're like dancing.
• 40:36
  Speaker 3: And your basketball player's still got his strut going on.
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: He's got the pimp walk going, even though he's still
• 40:41
  Speaker 3: a brain-dead monster.
• 40:42
  Speaker 7: He kind of has that old Frankenstein thing going.
• 40:44
  Speaker 3: For him, too. It's like a mixture of Frankenstein and
• 40:47
  Speaker 3: George Jefferson. Seriously.
• 40:48
  Speaker 5: Are you moving on up?
• 40:50
  Speaker 7: It's the soul limp.
• 40:54
  Speaker 3: But yeah the other one's like the the no face
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: one's got some sort of dance he does he does
• 40:58
  Speaker 3: this little jumping hopping move it's like a twitch thumbs
• 41:03
  Speaker 3: to be thrown about oh yeah there you go Kicking
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: up his heels. Yeah, the four of them running down
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: the hallway is the funniest thing ever. Wow, it's the
• 41:15
  Speaker 3: funniest thing since flailing the cat on the beach last week, which,
• 41:18
  Speaker 3: by the way, is another epic moment.
• 41:21
  Speaker 6: Wow.
• 41:22
  Speaker 5: Did this happen to a kitty?
• 41:24
  Speaker 3: No, no, he was enjoying it.
• 41:26
  Speaker 5: It was some stupid hippie running down the beach. He's
• 41:28
  Speaker 5: just running by himself all of a sudden. And then
• 41:30
  Speaker 5: all of a sudden, he's running with a cat. He's like,
• 41:33
  Speaker 5: holding the.
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: Cat around his neck. I laughed for like 10 minutes.
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: That was the funniest thing.
• 41:37
  Speaker 9: I've ever seen.
• 41:38
  Speaker 5: It was really weird.
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: He pulls the cat out of where he had that
• 41:42
  Speaker 3: gun because he's magically got a cat and he's running
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: up and down the beach with it like they're in
• 41:49
  Speaker 3: a romance novel.
• 41:50
  Speaker 5: I'm almost sad that I missed that. I'm glad that
• 41:52
  Speaker 5: I missed the entire rest of it.
• 41:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that would have been the reason to watch.
• 41:54
  Speaker 5: I want to see just that part.
• 41:56
  Speaker 3: I can bust it out.
• 41:56
  Speaker 5: Is it kind of like that one scene in Blood
• 42:00
  Speaker 5: Mania where they have the date scene?
• 42:02
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah, see? This is like a theme. We've got weird, cheesy,
• 42:06
  Speaker 3: you know.
• 42:06
  Speaker 5: Stupid beach scenes that make no fucking sense.
• 42:09
  Speaker 3: Although this one we just had an appearing gun out
• 42:11
  Speaker 3: of nowhere.
• 42:11
  Speaker 5: There needed to be a beach scene.
• 42:13
  Speaker 3: They were on an island.
• 42:14
  Speaker 5: Why wasn't there a beach scene?
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: There really shouldn't... Well, we had him like... At one
• 42:18
  Speaker 3: point he disappears from the compound and he's hiding out there.
• 42:20
  Speaker 3: In the jungle? Yeah, and they're out in the jungle.
• 42:23
  Speaker 3: So then they're, you know... They send their SWAT team
• 42:25
  Speaker 3: out there in their hardcore gear of miniskirts and machine guns.
• 42:29
  Speaker 16: No pants.
• 42:30
  Speaker 5: In the jungle, no pants.
• 42:31
  Speaker 3: That's a good idea.
• 42:32
  Speaker 8: But they had go-go boots, so that protects at least
• 42:34
  Speaker 8: up to their knees.
• 42:35
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they don't get bit by the snake. What's eye injuries?
• 42:37
  Speaker 12: I think they had, like, what do they call them?
• 42:41
  Speaker 12: Boy shorts on underneath the doodads.
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: They didn't look like it.
• 42:44
  Speaker 5: In my mind, they did.
• 42:47
  Speaker 3: To me, it just looked like they had a button-down
• 42:50
  Speaker 3: shirt on. Like a men's button-down shirt and underwear. That
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: was the look.
• 42:53
  Speaker 10: It was a Star Trek uniform.
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it kind of was.
• 42:56
  Speaker 5: That's what she said earlier.
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: Only a little shorter if you couldn't get away with
• 43:00
  Speaker 3: that on TV.
• 43:01
  Speaker 7: Shorter and shinier.
• 43:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, here they're just like, let's make it a little
• 43:04
  Speaker 3: shorter and a little lower cut in the front. That's
• 43:05
  Speaker 3: what we're looking for in this Starfleet. Yeah, but yeah,
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: that little scene in the jungle where he's hiding and
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: then just shoots the girls in the head. He just
• 43:13
  Speaker 3: pops up and nails that bitch in the head.
• 43:16
  Speaker 5: Isn't that your favorite girl?
• 43:18
  Speaker 3: That's my favorite girl.
• 43:19
  Speaker 12: Bam.
• 43:21
  Speaker 3: Crazy chick took a bullet in the head.
• 43:23
  Speaker 5: She never did nothing to no one.
• 43:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but she was not good at catching him because
• 43:27
  Speaker 3: he outsmarted her and he's kind of a dimwit.
• 43:30
  Speaker 5: I wasn't good at not getting shot.
• 43:32
  Speaker 3: In the head.
• 43:32
  Speaker 5: No. Caught in the face.
• 43:37
  Speaker 3: Oh, Lord. So, yeah. I don't know. Where else do
• 43:40
  Speaker 3: we go? Her wonderful lab with spinning lights.
• 43:43
  Speaker 5: It was a lot better than the lab.
• 43:45
  Speaker 3: Of last week. Yeah, last week was the worst excuse
• 43:47
  Speaker 3: for a scientist lab ever. This one's pretty damn impressive.
• 43:51
  Speaker 7: It had a lot of spinny lights and science-y stuff.
• 43:54
  Speaker 3: And last week we just had an empty fish tank.
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: She had a huge fish tank and it had organs
• 43:58
  Speaker 3: growing in it. And she had a giant freezer with
• 44:02
  Speaker 3: bodies in it. That's awesome, too.
• 44:04
  Speaker 7: She had that spinny-do, too.
• 44:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's that weird black and white pinwheel going on.
• 44:09
  Speaker 5: That's how you know you're really a doctor.
• 44:11
  Speaker 7: A mad doctor. Gotta have one of them things. She
• 44:14
  Speaker 7: didn't have that electro thing, though.
• 44:17
  Speaker 5: I said that last week.
• 44:20
  Speaker 6: Dr.
• 44:20
  Speaker 10: Frankenstein.
• 44:21
  Speaker 3: Every mad doctor needs one of those. Come on, man.
• 44:23
  Speaker 5: It's like those little balls that go to.
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah.
• 44:27
  Speaker 5: Regular doctors have those. Mad doctors have them.
• 44:30
  Speaker 7: And the storm globe.
• 44:31
  Speaker 5: Yeah, the storm globe. Oh, I think you can still
• 44:34
  Speaker 5: get that at Spencer Gifts.
• 44:35
  Speaker 7: You can.
• 44:35
  Speaker 3: $ 34. 95.
• 44:37
  Speaker 8: If any mad doctors at this table are interested.
• 44:41
  Speaker 3: I already have one.
• 44:42
  Speaker 5: I'm doing one tomorrow. One of you mad doctors out there.
• 44:44
  Speaker 3: I already have one.
• 44:46
  Speaker 8: That's where you start. You don't start with medical training.
• 44:48
  Speaker 8: You start with the fucking stormtroopers.
• 44:50
  Speaker 7: Yeah, you start with the stormtroopers.
• 44:52
  Speaker 5: And that starts with squirrels.
• 44:53
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's... So, what else? Where else do we want
• 44:59
  Speaker 3: to go? The grand finale, the big wrap-up, wherein all
• 45:03
  Speaker 3: of our villains basically get away. She just magically disappears.
• 45:07
  Speaker 5: Into a cloud of smoke, nevertheless.
• 45:08
  Speaker 3: She pulls the old smoke bomb.
• 45:11
  Speaker 6: Gone.
• 45:11
  Speaker 3: Crazy ninja bitch.
• 45:13
  Speaker 5: I expected her to be like, wah.
• 45:16
  Speaker 3: And then, yeah, Sid just sort of slinks on out.
• 45:19
  Speaker 5: Isn't that one scene where he pops up?
• 45:23
  Speaker 7: It's dark.
• 45:24
  Speaker 13: All you see is a frilly white shirt pop up
• 45:26
  Speaker 13: behind the bushes. He saunters off into the darkness.
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: Once again, he's got the pimp walk going, too. He's
• 45:31
  Speaker 3: got the cane thrown back over his shoulder. He's just
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: strutting on out of there.
• 45:35
  Speaker 5: The cane slash sword.
• 45:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's like, I'm going to take this money I
• 45:37
  Speaker 3: got here and head on out. So, yeah, basically our
• 45:41
  Speaker 3: two major villains just disappear at this point, and we
• 45:43
  Speaker 3: never see them again.
• 45:45
  Speaker 8: Well, at the end, after he's done playing sexy chess
• 45:51
  Speaker 8: with that weird girl.
• 45:52
  Speaker 3: We haven't even gotten to that yet. What's that? What
• 45:56
  Speaker 3: the fuck is going on?
• 45:57
  Speaker 4: No.
• 45:57
  Speaker 5: I kept looking at him like, she looks like her.
• 46:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's the thing. It's like they disappear, and
• 46:02
  Speaker 3: then he goes back to cash his check or whatever
• 46:05
  Speaker 3: he collects on delivering. He somehow pulls the one athlete
• 46:09
  Speaker 3: that he was supposed to go and find. He wasn't
• 46:11
  Speaker 3: dead yet, so he finds him, drags him back with him,
• 46:13
  Speaker 3: and gets his reward check. Yeah, what's his name?
• 46:18
  Speaker 5: What was that one guy's name? Cabin... Number two.
• 46:21
  Speaker 3: Cabin boy. Houseboy number two. Well, his driver was number one.
• 46:23
  Speaker 5: He was Starfleet ahead of his time.
• 46:25
  Speaker 7: He was like, make this little crappy vehicle go. Make
• 46:36
  Speaker 7: it so.
• 46:37
  Speaker 3: So, yeah, he just, like, didn't number his, you.
• 46:39
  Speaker 16: Know, servants.
• 46:40
  Speaker 6: So what happened?
• 46:40
  Speaker 7: What is the chick's name? Maria.
• 46:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the thing.
• 46:42
  Speaker 5: What happened to her?
• 46:43
  Speaker 10: Because Buckethead carried her off. Sid Haig stabbed Buckethead in
• 46:46
  Speaker 10: the back.
• 46:46
  Speaker 15: Of the head.
• 46:47
  Speaker 3: And then, like, you don't really see.
• 46:49
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 46:50
  Speaker 3: But, like, she wasn't dead as far as we know.
• 46:52
  Speaker 3: He just, like, knocked her out and was carrying her off. So, yeah, like,
• 46:55
  Speaker 3: all of our characters disappear at this point.
• 46:58
  Speaker 5: I remember him knocking her out. He just picked her up.
• 47:00
  Speaker 7: Yeah, he just picked her up.
• 47:01
  Speaker 5: They were just like.
• 47:01
  Speaker 7: She fainted.
• 47:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she fainted. Like, you know, he's a King Kong.
• 47:05
  Speaker 5: I guess if a buckethead attacked me, I'd probably faint.
• 47:07
  Speaker 12: Yeah.
• 47:08
  Speaker 8: I think they were like, hey, you know what, guys?
• 47:11
  Speaker 5: This movie's already an hour and a half. Let's wrap
• 47:13
  Speaker 5: this shit up.
• 47:14
  Speaker 3: Let's just get rid of the rest of these people.
• 47:16
  Speaker 3: What happens to them? Who cares?
• 47:18
  Speaker 5: Break out the sexy chest.
• 47:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we gotta get some.
• 47:21
  Speaker 12: How stupid is he to be picked up by another
• 47:23
  Speaker 12: woman in the same frickin' town?
• 47:26
  Speaker 5: It's like... dumb ass get.
• 47:28
  Speaker 3: The fuck out of there so yeah he collects his
• 47:31
  Speaker 3: check we don't see any of our villains or even
• 47:33
  Speaker 3: maria who was sort of on his side at that
• 47:35
  Speaker 3: point i i figured he would gonna go you know
• 47:37
  Speaker 3: take his little vacation with her that's that's how most
• 47:40
  Speaker 3: of these bond movies wrap up is whoever the girl
• 47:42
  Speaker 3: was that you know doesn't stab him in the back
• 47:44
  Speaker 3: and he doesn't shoot he ends up going off with
• 47:46
  Speaker 3: to have lots of sex with at the end you
• 47:48
  Speaker 3: know Well, no, we get this little close-up of some chick,
• 47:52
  Speaker 3: and it's this scary.
• 47:53
  Speaker 5: Her weird torso. Oh, my God. What the hell is
• 47:55
  Speaker 5: up with her shelf ribs? I didn't like that.
• 47:58
  Speaker 3: It was creepy. So then it pans up, and it's
• 48:00
  Speaker 3: this scary-looking blonde girl who, I guess, I don't know.
• 48:03
  Speaker 5: I thought it was a wig.
• 48:04
  Speaker 3: That's why I thought it was a wig.
• 48:05
  Speaker 5: That's the thing.
• 48:05
  Speaker 3: I think it was a wig. The entire time, I
• 48:08
  Speaker 3: thought it was a wig. So I don't know who
• 48:10
  Speaker 3: she was, really. She just appeared in the movie. And
• 48:12
  Speaker 3: she had her whispering. Oh, she seemed like the dumbest,
• 48:16
  Speaker 3: dumbest rock.
• 48:17
  Speaker 5: It made my brain hurt.
• 48:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she's an idiot. And then she wants to play chess.
• 48:21
  Speaker 3: I don't think so.
• 48:22
  Speaker 5: You know her dumb ass can't play chess.
• 48:23
  Speaker 3: She can't even.
• 48:24
  Speaker 5: You know, she just sits there and licks the pieces.
• 48:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she fumbles all the pieces. I like the little
• 48:29
  Speaker 3: horsey guy when I shove him in my... Oh, I'm
• 48:32
  Speaker 3: pretty sure that's what she was going to do at
• 48:34
  Speaker 3: one point. She was a... She was stroking a little
• 48:36
  Speaker 3: of everything on there. Fruits, chess pieces.
• 48:40
  Speaker 8: No woman should have to try that hard.
• 48:45
  Speaker 3: And he seems like he's kind of like a sure thing, really.
• 48:47
  Speaker 5: Why put that much effort into it?
• 48:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think so. Especially for that guy.
• 48:51
  Speaker 12: Pretty sure he was already like, let's go do it.
• 48:55
  Speaker 3: He's like, screw this chess nonsense. I'm going to lose.
• 48:58
  Speaker 5: It doesn't matter.
• 48:59
  Speaker 3: He's like, I don't even know how to play. It's
• 49:02
  Speaker 3: just here for show, honey. It bringing the babes in this.
• 49:06
  Speaker 5: And it was too long of a scene.
• 49:08
  Speaker 16: Holy shit. Thank you.
• 49:10
  Speaker 3: It went on forever. Go ahead.
• 49:12
  Speaker 5: I don't even know. It was too fucking long. They're
• 49:14
  Speaker 5: just sitting there staring at it, and she's licking the pieces,
• 49:16
  Speaker 5: and he's looking at her like she's a fucking retard,
• 49:18
  Speaker 5: but he's going to nail that shit anyways. But it's
• 49:20
  Speaker 5: just like, and then just like, then they make it out,
• 49:22
  Speaker 5: and then, nah, just took too long. And then at
• 49:25
  Speaker 5: the end, are we at the end?
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, go ahead and get to the, yeah.
• 49:29
  Speaker 5: Super duper spoiler alert.
• 49:30
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I think at the end, all those women, and
• 49:32
  Speaker 8: he was like, oh, fuck yeah, 20 women. I think
• 49:35
  Speaker 8: they all had the brain of that Dr. What's-Her-Face chick.
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: But why? Like how?
• 49:41
  Speaker 5: They could get in. I don't know.
• 49:43
  Speaker 3: They just appeared and then where was she at? Were
• 49:46
  Speaker 3: they taking a bath? Yeah, we got weird voiceover from her.
• 49:50
  Speaker 12: Maybe he just heard it reminiscing in his head from
• 49:53
  Speaker 12: what she told him.
• 49:54
  Speaker 3: Echoing in his big empty head.
• 49:56
  Speaker 13: So instead of having the look of oh shit on
• 49:58
  Speaker 13: the deep shit, he's looking at him like yeah.
• 50:00
  Speaker 3: She's sending me women.
• 50:02
  Speaker 10: Yeah, that is what he was thinking.
• 50:04
  Speaker 3: More women for me to nail. They all have guns.
• 50:07
  Speaker 7: We can all talk like that.
• 50:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, basically he's like, see you in the sequel.
• 50:12
  Speaker 7: Oh, wow.
• 50:15
  Speaker 17: I don't know.
• 50:16
  Speaker 8: This guy knows how to work it. I mean, insulting
• 50:18
  Speaker 8: her off the bat. Women can't stand that. This guy
• 50:22
  Speaker 8: knows how to work it. He insulted... Maria D'Arco, whatever,
• 50:27
  Speaker 8: faces character.
• 50:28
  Speaker 7: Right off the bat.
• 50:29
  Speaker 8: Yeah, he was like, when he was like, your legs
• 50:32
  Speaker 8: are too long or whatever.
• 50:34
  Speaker 5: If she had shot first, it would have voided all
• 50:36
  Speaker 5: this movie.
• 50:39
  Speaker 3: But that's the best part of the movie. So yeah,
• 50:43
  Speaker 3: how do you want to wrap this up? Because to me,
• 50:44
  Speaker 3: this is so awesomely bad. To me, it's a must-see
• 50:48
  Speaker 3: for everybody. It's a shame it's hard to come by
• 50:49
  Speaker 3: because I think if you like Any of these kind
• 50:52
  Speaker 3: of movies that we talk about, if you're a driving
• 50:54
  Speaker 3: kind of a dork that likes this sort of stuff, again,
• 50:57
  Speaker 3: that last two-thirds of this movie is well worth watching.
• 51:00
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah.
• 51:01
  Speaker 7: Definitely.
• 51:01
  Speaker 3: I think just the stunts, the action, the... The music, even.
• 51:05
  Speaker 3: The horror music.
• 51:06
  Speaker 5: The music was fantastic. I dug it. Except for that
• 51:08
  Speaker 5: song that had the siren repeating in the background the
• 51:10
  Speaker 5: whole time. I was ready to shoot people.
• 51:12
  Speaker 3: Well, it goes back and forth.
• 51:13
  Speaker 7: I thought we were going to start a rave.
• 51:14
  Speaker 3: We've got our.
• 51:15
  Speaker 5: There's no glow sticks. No, what's the... The lab.
• 51:20
  Speaker 3: She did have all kinds of glow sticks. Oh, it
• 51:23
  Speaker 3: is on. We've got our cheesy opening theme music, but
• 51:26
  Speaker 3: then it goes back and forth. Because then there's that
• 51:28
  Speaker 3: hallway shot when, Roger, you were like, this is the
• 51:31
  Speaker 3: worst music ever. I was like... I think it hits, like,
• 51:34
  Speaker 3: public domain music every once in a while, and then
• 51:36
  Speaker 3: they go back to, like, the.
• 51:37
  Speaker 5: It's so out of place, too.
• 51:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, just.
• 51:38
  Speaker 7: It's kind of, like, good music, and then the scene switched,
• 51:41
  Speaker 7: and it was, like, the worst music ever.
• 51:43
  Speaker 3: It's, like, from some sort of period piece music.
• 51:46
  Speaker 7: He said, like, this is the worst shot ever, because
• 51:48
  Speaker 7: they were going through the door, and it came out
• 51:51
  Speaker 7: of nowhere.
• 51:51
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it's like, I know. We'll wait for your guys.
• 51:53
  Speaker 7: Oh, God, it was terrible.
• 51:55
  Speaker 3: So, yeah, he's so hit and miss. It's like, this
• 51:57
  Speaker 3: guy sometimes does... really interesting shots and puts together really
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: good stuff and then other times it's like he just
• 52:02
  Speaker 3: sits the camera down it's like you guys go ahead
• 52:04
  Speaker 3: and finish this scene I gotta pee I'll be back
• 52:07
  Speaker 3: I'll be back in a minute so yeah directing is
• 52:11
  Speaker 3: questionable but yeah this once again is the man who
• 52:13
  Speaker 3: brought us the Angel movie so you know we have
• 52:15
  Speaker 3: to have a little respect you know we need to
• 52:18
  Speaker 3: watch those actually Angel Avenging Angel those are some fine
• 52:22
  Speaker 3: features were we talking about that the other day? we
• 52:24
  Speaker 3: were last Blood Mania time okay yeah yeah But yeah, otherwise,
• 52:30
  Speaker 3: I think it's pretty damn entertaining.
• 52:32
  Speaker 7: Yeah, it's definitely entertaining.
• 52:33
  Speaker 5: I'll watch it again.
• 52:34
  Speaker 7: Much better than... Like tonight.
• 52:36
  Speaker 3: I'm telling you.
• 52:37
  Speaker 5: It's better than some of the shit you've made me watch.
• 52:39
  Speaker 5: I'll give you that much.
• 52:40
  Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying. I went out on a high
• 52:41
  Speaker 3: note here.
• 52:42
  Speaker 5: It's definitely better than Dark Country.
• 52:44
  Speaker 3: You're just mad you didn't get to hang out with
• 52:47
  Speaker 3: him this past weekend.
• 52:47
  Speaker 5: I wanted to go punch him in his face. Was
• 52:49
  Speaker 5: Dark Country really bad?
• 52:51
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 52:51
  Speaker 7: Oh.
• 52:52
  Speaker 3: We need to get you a copy of Dark Country.
• 52:53
  Speaker 5: He's been peddling that movie for years. It is horrible.
• 52:57
  Speaker 3: It's terrible.
• 52:57
  Speaker 5: I like me some Thomas Jane normally.
• 52:59
  Speaker 8: Oh, yeah.
• 53:00
  Speaker 7: I think it's awesome.
• 53:01
  Speaker 4: But.
• 53:01
  Speaker 3: I wanted to fuck his shit up.
• 53:03
  Speaker 5: Not in a good way. Not in a good way.
• 53:06
  Speaker 13: When we were driving through Alabama at about 2 o'clock
• 53:09
  Speaker 13: in the.
• 53:09
  Speaker 7: Morning and it was dark, she's like, this.
• 53:12
  Speaker 5: Looks like dark country.
• 53:14
  Speaker 7: And it does.
• 53:15
  Speaker 3: And then you cursed the name of Thomas James.
• 53:16
  Speaker 5: I did. She did.
• 53:19
  Speaker 6: I did.
• 53:19
  Speaker 3: Poor Thomas James.
• 53:20
  Speaker 7: Damn that Thomas James.
• 53:21
  Speaker 3: He was trying to make a good movie.
• 53:24
  Speaker 5: That was the only reason I wanted to go to
• 53:26
  Speaker 5: that convention was to punch him in his face for
• 53:27
  Speaker 5: making that stupid movie.
• 53:29
  Speaker 6: Harsh.
• 53:30
  Speaker 3: I like Thomas Jane.
• 53:31
  Speaker 5: I like him too. I like him in some things.
• 53:34
  Speaker 5: I like him in The Mist. I like him in
• 53:35
  Speaker 5: many other things that I can't right now think of.
• 53:38
  Speaker 5: But Dark Country just made me violent and mad. Sorry,
• 53:43
  Speaker 5: go ahead.
• 53:44
  Speaker 3: All right, that's pretty much it.
• 53:46
  Speaker 4: Cool.
• 53:46
  Speaker 5: Thomas Jane, if you're listening, which I doubt you are,
• 53:48
  Speaker 5: fuck you.
• 53:51
  Speaker 3: But we really like you.
• 53:52
  Speaker 16: How about that?
• 53:53
  Speaker 3: There's the back and forth action we give you here.
• 53:56
  Speaker 3: We really like all of your other performances, but fuck you.
• 54:01
  Speaker 3: Damn dark country.
• 54:03
  Speaker 8: You know, I've heard Misty say this many times.
• 54:05
  Speaker 5: No, no, I'm done. That guy. He is dead to me.
• 54:14
  Speaker 3: Oh, God.
• 54:15
  Speaker 5: That's how she feels.
• 54:16
  Speaker 3: All right. We will take a break and come back
• 54:18
  Speaker 3: with the rest of the show.
• 54:22
  Speaker 5: If you're wondering, I am that Wonder Woman. Never had
• 54:26
  Speaker 5: a girl like me before. Wonder Woman, I can be
• 54:30
  Speaker 5: your everything.
• 54:31
  Speaker 7: I am that Wonder Woman.
• 54:33
  Speaker 5: You should be spending on me. Hey boy, you like me? Yeah, yeah,
• 54:38
  Speaker 5: you want me? Got a little surprise for you. All
• 54:41
  Speaker 5: you really gotta do is spoil.
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: Visit our concession and see for yourself the delicious treats, drinks,
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: and snacks awaiting you. If you are thirsty, try ice
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: cold soft drinks or a cup of hot flavorful coffee.
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: Get something to go with it, like a sizzling and
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: satisfying hot dog or a tasty tender sandwich. Try one
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: of these delicious treats and you'll be back at the
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: concession for more before the show is over. The service
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: at our concession is friendly and efficient.
• 55:17
  Speaker 7: Driving across the desert tonight. Take care of that new
• 55:21
  Speaker 7: wife of yours. You ready?
• 55:27
  Speaker 15: One last look?
• 55:28
  Speaker 5: No, thanks. You think we're crazy? You feel that? It's
• 55:37
  Speaker 5: like an oven outside, so hot.
• 55:41
  Speaker 17: You don't realize how much light starlight gives off All
• 55:49
  Speaker 17: the same, I'm going to stick with the lights.
• 55:55
  Speaker 3: You all right?
• 55:56
  Speaker 5: Oh, God, you hit him. Stay in the car.
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: I need your help. Get the door in.
• 56:03
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 56:04
  Speaker 5: What are we going to do?
• 56:05
  Speaker 15: Don't worry.
• 56:06
  Speaker 3: You'll be fine.
• 56:19
  Speaker 7: The Honeymoon is over.
• 56:21
  Speaker 5: Thomas Jane, Lauren German, and Ron Perlman.
• 56:24
  Speaker 7: Dark Country.
• 56:49
  Speaker 3: Show starts in two minutes.
• 56:51
  Speaker 6: Welcome to a night of total terror.
• 56:58
  Speaker 3: That's Mickey Mouse's penis.
• 57:03
  Speaker 5: They don't look to be afraid. They look to be shocked.
• 57:06
  Speaker 5: Here's vagina.
• 57:08
  Speaker 7: Did you see Miley Cyrus' globulous breasts?
• 57:12
  Speaker 16: Night of the living podcast.
• 57:15
  Speaker 5: I found more syrup on my pants.
• 57:18
  Speaker 12: Bizarre adventure in fear.
• 57:20
  Speaker 7: There was, however, a guy using.
• 57:23
  Speaker 6: An experience in shock.
• 57:25
  Speaker 1: More shattering than your strangest nightmare.
• 57:28
  Speaker 3: Penetration.
• 57:30
  Speaker 16: Night of the Living Podcast.
• 57:33
  Speaker 5: Ass to mouth is fantastic.
• 57:36
  Speaker 7: Holy shit!
• 57:37
  Speaker 3: That just happened.
• 57:38
  Speaker 5: What's that bad man doing to my donkey? A night
• 57:42
  Speaker 5: of total terror.
• 57:44
  Speaker 10: I can't maintain this level of ridiculousness.
• 57:47
  Speaker 5: They made a song.
• 57:48
  Speaker 12: Night.
• 58:01
  Speaker 16: Of the Living Podcast.
• 58:06
  Speaker 5: My mom wants to do shit!
• 58:08
  Speaker 6: What's part of your problem?
• 58:09
  Speaker 3: You know, you haven't seen enough movies. All of life's
• 58:12
  Speaker 3: riddles are answered.
• 58:14
  Speaker 13: In the movies.
• 58:15
  Speaker 6: And now, on with the show.
• 58:16
  Speaker 5: Wonder Woman You are so fucking.
• 58:23
  Speaker 17: Hot They burn out if you leave them on.
• 58:37
  Speaker 5: For a long time. Apparently, if you leave lava lamps
• 58:59
  Speaker 5: on for a long time, they explode. I found that out.
• 59:02
  Speaker 5: I had blue glitter lava lamp everywhere.
• 59:04
  Speaker 7: Now you know.
• 59:07
  Speaker 5: And no one's had to battle.
• 59:09
  Speaker 7: G.I.
• 59:11
  Speaker 6: G.I.
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: Joe.
• 59:12
  Speaker 8: My aunt got me a lava lamp a couple years ago.
• 59:14
  Speaker 5: She gives me the most awesome gifts.
• 59:16
  Speaker 8: Lava lamp, BB gun, Esteban guitar, retro payphone.
• 59:23
  Speaker 5: God, she's so awesome. I love this aunt.
• 59:26
  Speaker 8: Everyone else gives me dumb shit.
• 59:28
  Speaker 5: Right? Oh, karaoke machine. I miss my karaoke machine.
• 59:33
  Speaker 7: I know.
• 59:34
  Speaker 5: I just want hours of fun with myself.
• 59:36
  Speaker 3: Whoa, wait a minute.
• 59:38
  Speaker 5: I mean.
• 59:38
  Speaker 3: What kind of show is this? Oh, wait, it is
• 59:40
  Speaker 3: that kind of show. Go ahead.
• 59:41
  Speaker 5: It's going to be that kind of party.
• 59:42
  Speaker 3: Expound upon it. Feel free. Alright, we are back. And Misty,
• 59:47
  Speaker 3: you should rejoice, because for weeks now, you have doubted
• 59:50
  Speaker 3: his love for us. Randy? But this week is the
• 59:53
  Speaker 3: triumphant return of Randy.
• 59:56
  Speaker 5: Randy. Wow. He doesn't like us.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 9: Hey, Movie Meltdown, it's Randy, trying to catch back up
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 9: with you on feedback. Let's see, first issue, the first
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 9: thing I have to get off my chest, you horribly evil,
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 9: sick Demented fucking people, what's wrong with you? There's some
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 9: lines you don't cross and you went skipping over it.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 9: So I'm going to have to bitch at you a
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 9: little bit, so here we go. I'd rather watch a
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 9: double bill of martyrs and a Serbian film sitting in
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 9: the middle of a crying class at daycare, kids. Preferably
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 9: in a hot August day in an inner city facility
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 9: where they're all miserable and unhappy than ever in my life.
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 9: Sit through. The dark crystal where that poor little Muppet
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 9: gets its soul sucked out and you fuckers are laughing
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 9: about it. What's wrong with you? I don't know what
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 9: to say. I thought I knew you guys. I thought
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 9: I knew you. Let's see.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 3: Let's see.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 9: Chew your ass about this. Pontypool.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 3: Pontypool.
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 9: Love me some Pontypool. What a great performance by Mazzy.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 9: The only thing was... Like you all said, that whole
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 9: explanation at the end, like, what the fuck are you
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 9: talking about? Infected words. Points for effort. None for execution
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 9: in the end on that. That really lost me. Although,
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 9: I think that it would have been awesome if it
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 9: wasn't just this random, that random word, but if it was, like, monominot.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 9: Because that would be some funny shit, watching people get
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 9: infected from monominot. Let's see, other notes here. April Fool's Day. Fuck,
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 9: there's nothing I hate more than the, it was just
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 9: a dream or we were just kidding, you bullshit. I
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 9: think you guys should know that I think you could
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 9: just take your podcasting equipment, throw it in a shopping cart,
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 9: and walk around a grocery store, and that would probably
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 9: be fucking the most awesome stuff ever. Especially if you
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 9: could hook it up in the car, and we could
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 9: hear all your commentary as you just drive there. I'd
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 9: like to put in one quick closing note. We just
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 9: lost Harvey Picard, as I'm sure you all know. And
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 9: I don't remember who it was that said it, but
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 9: somebody really bright was talking about how blogging and the
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 9: story of the common man kind of found its roots
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 9: initially in a lot of his work. And that's one
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 9: of the most enjoyable parts of your show, is hearing
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 9: about Marlena's insane people or Misty's observations or... Roger's work
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 9: travails or whatever the hell's going on. Sorry if I
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 9: ran long. Just wanted to check back in with you.
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 9: Hope you're all doing well. Thanks again.
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 3: Talk to you later. Awesome.
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 5: Randy's my favorite listener. Don't tell everybody else that, though.
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 3: He has set the bar high for the rest of
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 3: you guys. If you can deliver voicemails like that, we'll
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 3: put you in the running. But once again, he has
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 3: taken the throne.
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 12: Oh, man.
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 3: Sick fucking people.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, really?
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 3: You've been listening this long and you're just figuring that out?
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 3: I mean, Jesus. We are sick bastards.
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 6: You know that.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 7: Not right.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 3: Well, even today, I think he tweeted when he found out,
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 3: because I told him a while ago, one of the
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 3: ones I was trying to get a hold of, and
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 3: he was like, you're actually going to do Wonder Women.
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 3: Holy shit. And I was like, yep, we're hardcore. That's
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 3: how we roll.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 5: I thought I saw Randy get the Fiddler's Mall the
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 5: other day, but then I realized he's very far away,
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 5: and then it could not have possibly been Randy, which
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 5: saved me the embarrassment of running up and being excited
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 5: to see him.
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 3: Like, oh my god, it's Randy. No, it's not Randy.
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 5: He wouldn't be stalking you.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 3: It could have been. Maybe he's stalking you.
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 3: He's got a lot going on. I don't know if
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 3: he has time to drive back and forth, but maybe
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 3: he will eventually.
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 5: I'm stalking you through other people, Randy.
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 3: Like one of them crazy body hopping movies. It's going
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 3: to hop six times and get to you, Randy. You're
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 3: in trouble.
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 4: Run!
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 5: The movie Fallen.
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 3: Or like six other ones that they scanned that on
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 3: the first power. so oh yeah pontypool awesome uh april
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 3: fool's day i still think it set the bar for
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 3: that it's pissed off it pisses people like misty off
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 3: and everyone else in the world but i give it
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 3: credit for catching people off guard back in the 80s i.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 5: Would have been way more satisfied with that movie had
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 5: those characters actually died not only just the characters but
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 5: there's actually the actors that actually play those.
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 3: Characters hey hey hey don't you be talking smack about
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 3: biff Dead. Biff's one of the finest, well, okay, he's
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 3: in one of the finest movies ever. And actually, from
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 3: what I hear, a very nice guy, even though he
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 3: came off terrible in that movie.
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 5: All of them can burn.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 3: No, not Biff.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 5: What movie are you talking about?
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 3: April Fool's Day.
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 5: I know, but what other movie was he in?
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 3: He's in Back to the Future.
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 10: And it's Biff.
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 3: He's Biff.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 6: Oh.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 12: Yeah. I can't place his face in my head, but
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 12: I know the name.
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 5: That's all I'm saying. I was watching.
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 8: This is random, but, you know, Back to the Future, Ghostbusters.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 8: They were my favorite movies growing up. I was fucking watching...
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 8: Ghostbusters 2 at work the other day, and some asshole
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 8: comes in and he's like.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 5: Oh, can you make me a fruity martini? Ha ha ha,
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 5: we put it on soccer?
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 8: Rick Moranis had just come on the screen.
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 5: I'm like, you fucking dick.
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 13: That's where you sit there and look at him and go, uh,
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 13: the remote's broken. And I can't reach the TV.
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 5: I'm too short. I have short, stubby arms.
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 12: I watched Ghostbusters 1 yesterday, and I really, really, really, really,
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 12: really want to watch Ghostbusters 2 now.
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 5: I want to see Slumber.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 8: I'm just like, I fucking love Rick and Marianas.
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 6: Ugh!
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 5: Actually, nobody thinks that's weird, but I think Dan Aykroyd
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 5: was hot, and everybody gives me fun. I'm totally on
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 5: board with you.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 3: She said she loves Rick and Marianas, not she thinks
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 3: he's hot.
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 12: No, no, no.
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 5: No, I do, though.
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 12: Okay.
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 16: Okay.
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 3: I was going to break that down.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 3: Because I still, you know, I have warm feelings toward
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 3: Rick Moranis. Don't think he's hot. That's a very different situation.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 8: Yesterday when I was unpacking, I came across a VHS
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 8: copy of Strange Brew, and I'm like, oh, I want.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 7: To watch this.
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 16: Awesome.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 7: Strange Brew is classic.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 5: I like that TV show that Dan Aykroyd was in.
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 5: Was it Holy Man? Yeah.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 3: I think you're the only one that saw it.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 5: It came out Sunday. He was a preacher who rode
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 5: a motorcycle.
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah. So, I don't know. What do you guys think?
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 3: After this, pack up all the shit and go to
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 3: a grocery store?
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Which grocery store?
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 3: Dirty Carver.
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 8: Hmm.
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 10: Dirty Carver.
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 3: Value Market.
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 3: Mid-City Mall. There's all kinds of people for me to
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 3: make fun of.
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 5: Why don't we just go to Walmart, then?
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 3: Oh. That's, like, too much information.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 5: Much bigger space.
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 12: Yeah.
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 5: Much bigger asses. They have those cars that go, you know,
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 5: and beep, beep when you back up.
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 3: I think our heads will explode at Walmart. There's just
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 3: too many things to make fun of there. We'll have
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 3: to narrow it down.
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 5: Hey, baby, look at this.
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 3: That's how you sound. Come on.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 5: Every time I go to Walmart when I leave, that's
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 5: how I sound.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 17: She does.
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 7: We leave Walmart and then she goes, hey, baby, what
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 7: are we going to fix tonight?
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 3: Don't fix for some supper.
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 6: What? Yikes.
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 5: What the fuck's going on there?
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 7: Stop it.
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 5: Stop it. I'm afraid to go to Walmart anymore.
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 3: You should be.
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 5: I'm afraid somebody's going to try to sell me a
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 5: damn baby. I don't want to buy a baby from Walmart.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 5: I'd be retarded. You'd be a mentally deficient woman. It
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 5: would have one arm. It was like a couple of
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 5: weeks ago. They really tried to sell you a baby. No,
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 5: not me.
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 12: I was watching the news at the hospital when I
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 12: got my stitches and These two meth heads tried to
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 12: sell their child for $ 25 at Walmart.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 7: Wow.
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 10: That's a low price.
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 3: Yeah, really.
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 5: I'm not going to give you $ 25.
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 3: Roll back. Baby roll back.
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 7: It's eyes roll back.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 5: But the people were like, oh, you don't want to pay? Well,
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 5: just take the baby. Just take the baby. My mom
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 5: was like, no, I don't want to take your baby.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 8: I would have taken the baby to Child Protective Services.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 12: But they called the cops and went to the house
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 12: and found them in complete swaller.
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 5: You would have taken it and dressed it in baby lederhosen.
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 10: Which, by the way, I.
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 7: Found a pair of lederhosen for a two-year-old.
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 10: And I was sitting there looking at it.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 7: I was like, God, who do I know that has
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 7: a kid that would actually have these?
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 8: Me someday when I have children. Oh, I talked my
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 8: friend Jamie into going to Polka Fest with me.
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 5: I'm so excited. I was like, do you like Polka?
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 8: He's like, no, but I like beer, so I'll go.
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 5: When is this Polka Fest?
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 10: I don't know.
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 5: So you wouldn't have had to talk somebody into going.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 5: She's excited about it. I've never seen anybody this excited
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 5: about anything related to Polka whatsoever. Well, one, there is
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 5: going to be beer. And polka school.
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 3: This perfectly illustrates Randy's point. It's good to know that
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 3: people are somewhat entertained by our ridiculous lives and banter
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 3: because there's a lot of it. And yeah, I've gotten
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 3: to the point I kind of like it and I
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 3: leave most of it in there because... um you can
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 3: just take.
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 13: A lot i mean that's to me that's the point
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 13: of it it's like there's a lot of shows out
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 13: there and if you don't put a little bit of
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 13: your personality into it then what's.
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 3: The point you know if you.
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 13: Don't have misty wandering around a peddler's mall with a
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 13: booby mug Which I had to do, damn it.
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 5: My stepdad went to the Peddler's Mall on Friday, but
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 5: apparently he had his other daughter with him, so he
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 5: didn't want to buy the boobie mug. So when he
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 5: found out that I was going there, he's like, well,
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 5: if you buy it for me, I'll pay you back.
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 5: So I had to walk.
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 3: It was a thing. Have you seen those shaped like
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 3: a boobie?
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 7: Right out of the nipple.
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 5: So I had to carry this thing through the entire
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 5: Peddler's Mall.
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 7: This is fucking awesome. Women are grabbing their children and
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 7: hiding their eyes.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 5: Yeah, really. It's like... What was it? There was still
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 5: a black one there, too. Oh, I'm going. Which peddler's mom?
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 5: If I tell her, you're going to beat her to it.
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 4: Fight, fight.
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 5: You're going to tell me off, Mike, okay? Don't touch
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 5: my black boob.
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 3: So I had.
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 5: To carry this huge-ass boob.
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 7: I love that you subbed from the nipple. That is excellent.
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 3: Obviously.
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 5: It kept poking me in the leg.
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 3: I'd say don't you hate when that happens, but no,
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 3: I'm okay with that, actually. That can happen all the time.
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 5: Jay wouldn't carry it for me. I had to carry it.
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 3: No, no.
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 10: It's my purchase.
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 5: I'm so hungry. Can we please be done? Is the
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 5: boob making you hungry? It makes me really want some milk.
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 7: She's thinking of a cock mug.
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 5: I was like, what can I think of that would
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 5: be embarrassing enough for me to make my stepdad go
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 5: pick up for me and make him carry it through
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 5: his door? And Jay said I had to find a cock.
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 7: I told her she got to find a cock, Mom.
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 3: Nice.
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 16: I need you.
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 7: To pick this up for me. Please, please.
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 2: Oh, man.
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 8: Sorry.
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 3: Oh, God, please.
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 8: This is bachelorette party related, but if you're interested, I
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 8: have some penis-shaped ice molds.
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 5: Is it a penis on a straw?
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 8: Yeah, it's a penis straw.
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 3: There's a whole penis on a something related industry out there.
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 3: Just feeding off the bachelorette parties out there. You just
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 3: have to realize that whatever you want, somewhere there's something
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 3: out there that's shaped like it with a penis on it.
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 3: It's the world we live in. Definitely.
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 5: My friend has underwear with a penis on them.
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 3: Which is interesting, and I'm like, hmm. I have underwear
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 3: with the pants. Yeah, doesn't that seem sort of redundant,
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 3: isn't it? Unless it's women's underwear, and that makes no sense.
• 1:11:32
  Speaker 5: It's women's underwear.
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 3: Well, that really makes no sense.
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 5: It's like a thong. It's really cute, except for the
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 5: dancing dick on it.
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 3: Is it like instructions? Insert here?
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 5: He doesn't really have jazz hands. He does. He's like dancing.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 5: He's got a hat on.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 3: Jazz hands. Dance it on this way. Yikes.
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 5: Please, please. Let that be my next tattoo. Dancing penis.
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 8: I'm getting Corey Feldman.
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 5: I'm telling you. You got a Corey Feldman tramp stamp.
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 5: Give me right here. I'm telling you.
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 3: It's just his face peeking out of your pants.
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 5: I'm playing this. I'm playing.
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 3: You say that now.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 7: No, it's awesome for somebody else to have.
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's awesome.
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 5: But you're going to have to see it. Just remember,
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 5: you're going to have to see that pitch.
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 3: Until you come in the room and you start having
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 3: a spastic fit. Feldman looked at me. Feldman looked at me.
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 7: Everywhere you go, he looks at you.
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 5: My Corey does look at you no matter where he goes.
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 16: Breathe, baby, breathe.
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 13: That's why I told her not to get pain on
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 13: the inside of her leg, because I.
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 7: Didn't want to look at it.
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 5: Yeah, you just, like, looked over and was like, I
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 5: was looking out for you.
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 3: Dude, stop staring at me. God.
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 5: Don't look at me.
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 3: Don't look at me.
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 5: Don't you fucking look at me. I don't like your leg.
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 5: You've got one hand over here, like, covering its eyes.
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 7: I'll get out of the way for you.
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 3: Okay, we've got to get out the duct tape again.
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 9: Hold on.
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 5: So much people are in the conversation.
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 7: Leave your socks on. You can never leave your socks on.
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 12: It would be really hard for us to get in
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 12: a photo booth, though.
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 3: We would try. We would totally try.
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 16: Oh, Jesus.
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 5: We're the worst. What they have at the Chuck E.
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 5: Cheese is what they have in the little car you
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 5: sit in. Please. I think we'd get kicked out of
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 5: Chuck E.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 8: Cheese.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 3: Again? Yeah, again.
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 5: If I had a nickel for every time I got kicked.
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 3: Out of Chuck E.
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 15: Cheese.
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 3: You'd have $ 37.
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 16: Right?
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 5: I hate that place. Those animatronic pastors scare the fuck
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 5: out of me.
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 3: I'm getting dizzy.
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 12: It's hunger and funny.
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 5: We're all slap-happy.
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 3: Obviously.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 5: I hope you're happy, Randy. Oh, Randy. All this was
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 5: for you, Randy.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 3: It's all for you, Randy.
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 5: It's all for you.
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 3: These are the lives you're so entertained with. That's sad
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 3: for all of you.
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 5: Hey, no.
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 3: Awesome.
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 5: We all are. That's true.
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 3: On that note.
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 5: Don't be shy.
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 17: Just let your feelings roll on by.
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 15: Don't be shy. We'd like to hear from you. So
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 15: give us a call at 502-365-5565. Or you can email
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 15: us at geeksatmoviemeltdown.com. And just stop by the website for
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 15: our frequent updates. That's moviemeltdown.com. And while you're there, click
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 15: on the forums link and go to our message boards
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 15: at Pop Syndicate. Or go to PopSyndicate.com and go to
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 15: the forum sections and look for Movie.
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 5: Meltdown.
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 8: I didn't get here on time for this movie, but
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 8: I think I did watch more of it than the
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 8: last four movies.
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 5: I don't think you fell asleep. I texted a lot,
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 5: but I don't think you fell asleep. I didn't fall asleep, though.
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 3: Not once. I'm proud of you.
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 5: Yay for Marlena!
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 8: Roger passed the torch on to me a little time ago.
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 5: He usually sleeps during this part of the night.
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 12: Which I think is why he's holding on to his
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 12: microphone right now.
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 3: I'm just trying to hold myself up.
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 7: I'm trying to hold myself together.
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 5: Wrap it up.
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 3: Okay, kids, get out your decoder bins. Oh, yeah. Nobody
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 3: was here to do it last week. I wanted a
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 3: good one this week.
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 5: Do we have to start all over again?
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 3: Sure, go ahead.
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 5: Build up.
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 3: Dun, dun, dun, dun. They have lost it, ladies and gentlemen.
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 3: So I'll move on. It is time for the movie
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 3: meltdown secret circle reveal of the next one and a
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 3: half features. I don't know. It's a little off once again,
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 3: as we always are.
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 2: I think your pills are like, where are you? Osmosis drugs.
• 1:16:11
  Speaker 5: That is hot. All right, the next movie we're going
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 5: to watch will be a movie that I actually suggested.
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 5: I didn't suggest it. I told you to watch it
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 5: to see if you thought we should do it, but
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 5: instead you're saying we're going to watch it.
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because I don't have time to sit around and
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 3: watch it when we're not watching it for the show,
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 3: so screw it.
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 5: All the boys love Mandy Lane.
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 3: And from what I hear, they do. So, yes.
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 5: I'm not completely at all ghetto bootleg copy of it,
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 5: so it ought to be okay.
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 3: Completely legit.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 6: Uh-huh.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 3: It's allowed in this country, totally. Sure. So, yeah. Next
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 3: week's feature is All the Boys Love Mandy Lane.
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 5: It's exciting. She's pretty hot. But not in an annoying way.
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 3: And the following week, no telling exactly what all is
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 3: going to be going on. Shenanigans. Yeah, it's going to
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 3: be quite the cavalcade of comedy, I'm sure. Because once again,
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 3: much like sending us to the grocery store, you're going
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 3: to send us to sit there in the middle of
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 3: a convention and have the dorks walk past us. It's
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 3: not our fault.
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 5: And they're outfits that probably will not match.
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 3: Outfits. It's not our fault. It's entrapment there. I mean,
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 3: we're going to have to make comments. It's not my fault.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 7: What if I get beat up by this time?
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 9: Probably.
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 7: They'll take a lot of notes.
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 5: Boys, get out your pencil pocket protectors.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 7: We're going to take them out.
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 3: No, it'll just be a really large woman, probably.
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 7: What did you say about me?
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 5: Jody's not going to be there, is he?
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 15: Probably.
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 3: Jody loves you.
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 5: No, he doesn't. He was shot in a pole by
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 5: my language.
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 3: Jody is... He's not allowed to listen to this show, but.
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 5: The guy who I had to interview at the last show.
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 3: I had to interview.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 5: Me with my complete lack of social skills.
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 3: And yet you do really good interviews. I don't care
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 3: what you say.
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 5: But he decided I had to do the interview.
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 3: Jody did. I think because he thought I wasn't going
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 3: to do it. So he's trying to scam you.
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 5: So, yeah, I had to listen to his movie about
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 5: remote-controlled airplanes.
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 6: Nice.
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah, in the future, as a sport.
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 16: Fighting.
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 3: All over the world.
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 5: He was excited about it. Fighting.
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 7: Sounds pretty rowdy. Fighting remote-controlled airplanes.
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 3: So yes, we will be back at Fright Night Film
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 3: Fest week after next. So we will be coming to
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 3: you live via digital recording from the floor of Fright
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 3: Night Film Fest. And at this point, I don't even
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 3: think we're going to attempt to watch a movie that
• 1:18:21
  Speaker 3: week because last time we tried to and then it
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 3: never happened because we were so sidetracked on all the shenanigans.
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 5: We'll just continually watch the trailer for Cockhammer.
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we'll probably be watching a lot of Cockhammer again
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 3: because we sat next to Cockhammer trailer last time.
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 8: Your movie is called cock hammer you need to deliver.
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 3: Right really hammers that were cocks at that point it's
• 1:18:40
  Speaker 3: all downhill i mean how can you i mean when
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 3: you name it cock hammer where are you gonna go
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 3: that's gonna top that really i don't know so yeah
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 3: i did we're gonna watch something i normally not the
• 1:18:52
  Speaker 3: movies that are there this entire film fest and it's
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 3: sad because i usually sit at the table the whole
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 3: time and never see a movie period But they are
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 3: doing really cool stuff at the drive-in, so I kind
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 3: of want to go see stuff at the drive-in.
• 1:19:01
  Speaker 5: It's not going to have Michael Madsen ate a fry.
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 3: It might have it. He wants to come back. I
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 3: don't know if he's going to.
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 12: Michael Madsen?
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 5: He was here last year.
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 3: And he loved the drive-in.
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 5: And he loved the deep fried red velvet cakes.
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 3: Maybe we'll go hang out at the drive-in with Michael Madsen.
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 3: That would be awesome. That will be the following week.
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 3: Other than that, we'll round it out. I want to
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 3: thank all of you guys for joining me on this
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 3: epic journey that is Greedo Bloody Greedo.
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 5: Even us, we only saw once.
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 3: You're slackers, but thanks.
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 10: No, we were at the end of the journey.
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 3: Thanks for coming in on the good one.
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 5: You would have wanted my review on the other ones.
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 3: I also wanted to thank Randy, who actually helped prep
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 3: some of this a long time ago. Once again, it
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 3: was a good week for you to call in, because
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 3: I wanted to thank you anyway.
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 5: He's my favorite listener, but don't tell that to every
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 5: other listener.
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 3: You do know you're on the microphone right now.
• 1:19:58
  Speaker 8: Anyway.
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, thanks to Greg for sitting in with us last week.
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 3: He did a great job.
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 5: He's my second favorite listener.
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 3: As far as I'm concerned, he'll be back next week or,
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 3: you know, whenever. We'll see if we can make him
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 3: a glutton for punishment and join us as regular as
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 3: he's up for it.
• 1:20:13
  Speaker 5: Does that mean I can skip out on more episodes?
• 1:20:15
  Speaker 3: No, no. You have to stay here.
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 6: No.
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 3: Oh, and the big final thanks goes to Maria de
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 3: Aragon herself, for it was her taking the time to
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 3: talk to me that inspired me to put this whole
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 3: ridiculous extravaganza together.
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 5: So is this really a good thing or a bad thing?
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 5: Because a lot of suffering went into this.
• 1:20:34
  Speaker 12: I'm thinking.
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 3: So thanks to Maria and everyone at Cool Water Productions
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 3: for helping make it all possible. And once again, we'll
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 3: go out. I've pieced together as much as I could
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 3: on these Greedo songs. So this is a track called
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 3: Greedo's Song from the Blind Pharaohs. Otherwise, that about does it.
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 3: We will return next week. Same geek time, same geek feed.
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 3: Thanks for listening.
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 5: Bye! Bye from Corey.
• 1:21:01
  Speaker 12: Bye.
• 1:21:01
  Speaker 13: My guardian angel up and left me.
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 18: The devil is knocking at my door I can't sleep
• 1:21:20
  Speaker 18: at night and I can't stand to be awake Cause
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 18: my baby don't live here anymore She swore that she'd
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 18: be with me forever But forever came and went like
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 18: a holiday She gave me no good reason and I
• 1:21:44
  Speaker 18: guess that's.
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 5: Just as well. Cause no reason's good enough to take
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 5: her place.
• 1:22:24
  Speaker 18: I'd give everything that I've got If that ain't enough
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 18: I'd get some.
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 5: More I'd sell the world.
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 18: Down the river just to get my baby back But
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 18: all I can do is walk the floor Cause my
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 18: baby don't live here.
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 15: Anymore This show is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 15: and edited by Brian Renfro, featuring contact music performed by
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 15: Tamara Deering. To help support the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com
• 1:23:09
  Speaker 15: for ways that you can contribute or advertise with us.