Latest / Death Before Decay / Own Your Glow
Transcript
- speaker-0: All right, welcome to the Death Before Decay podcast. I'm here with my usual co-host John Erline. Hello. And today we're here with a friend of mine, Mindy Coo. Yes. she is a local entrepreneur. She is a therapist. she is an EDM aficionado and just a really cool person. Yeah. speaker-2: That's cool. speaker-0: Yeah, it is. You should see the outfits, but yeah, welcome Mindy. Welcome to the show. speaker-1: Yes, thanks for having me. speaker-0: Thanks for coming. so tell us a little bit about yourself, speaker-1: Yeah. So I'm the owner of and founder of Bloomy Minds Psychotherapy. Yeah. And I've been doing it since well, I've been a therapist since 18. I started the business then and it was called Mindy Koo LLC and then I changed it over to Bloomy Minds in 2020. And then I kind of grew, you know, just from there. And I think now there's like 15 clinicians, 15. I have like 15 providers. speaker-0: That's insane. speaker-1: Yeah. So, so in 2020, it was just like me. for the longest time, but hey, you know, we're growing and I love it. speaker-0: Fifteen's crazy, that's awesome. Congratulations. speaker-2: That's really good growth. Like so every couple every year you're like adding like one or two people. speaker-1: yeah, so it's a growing I love it too. It's a growing field too. So it's like, yeah, so we have new graduate. Yeah speaker-0: Yeah, you also like re kind of rehabbed an old building on eighth street in Sheboygan. Right by the old Piggly Wiggly on the north side. Yeah. speaker-2: really? Yeah. speaker-0: by the old Noah's Ark pet store. Yeah. speaker-2: right on. speaker-1: to be the old Lakeshore dental speaker-0: It is, it all it's full circle. speaker-1: So yeah, it's pretty cool building stop by if you guys ever speaker-0: Yeah, absolutely. you've got a lot of cool stuff going on. You're all like I love watching your social media. speaker-1: Kind of crazy. speaker-0: John the EDM festivals are pretty crazy. speaker-2: Can we just pause on that for a sec? So when we say E D festivals, like there's a picture in my head that's painted that may not be appropriate for this podcast here. What's going through ra watch? speaker-1: Please watch your head. speaker-2: No, so like say more about this. Like disc give me a description, paint the picture. speaker-1: So it's like the rave community like I know that a lot of the times when people think about like EDM festivals and rave like they think about like drugs and you know, like whatever the negative speaker-2: I was speaker-1: Yeah, but it's like the community is actually like way bigger than that. It's like a whole, you know, I really like the part about the freedom of expression, like, and it is all about like, they have this thing called plur, it's called peace, love, unity, respect. And it's all about that. Like when you go there, it's like, it's like you can be whoever and whatever and anyone and your true self and you're not judged. So speaker-2: So it's kinda like dance like nobody's watching. speaker-1: Yeah, yeah. Okay. Literally, like, it's like a whole community, like a lot of people like judgment free. speaker-2: Judgment free. Very true No judgment. No judgment. No, that's great because like honestly, when I dance, it is like I dance like nobody's watching. I got decent moves, but they're they're good for me. Yeah. You know, so like I kind of take that approach. So if I went to one of these festivals, you're saying that I would be accepted. speaker-1: Yep. Yeah, you can be, yeah, you, you, yeah. Whatever. speaker-0: We gotta get him the right outfit though. speaker-1: It's just like, it's just like, speaker-0: Your outfits are fun as well. speaker-1: yeah, you can wear literally wear whatever, but then, people just. speaker-2: My mom was a real expressive gal. Yeah. You know, she always had the outfits and I feel like like I embraced her on that. Like on this last fourth of July I had quite the get up. speaker-1: I love it. love it. Yeah. it's a fun, time. speaker-0: Cool. Yeah. speaker-2: That's awesome. And now how often do you go? Like is this like a monthly thing? speaker-1: Yeah, like, like, I'm trying to slow down a bit because I've seen like all the DJs and, and, know, musician or artist that I've like, I wanted to see now. So a lot of issues on repeat now. So I'm trying to go to like different, different festivals, but we used to do like, like, you know, So it speaker-0: There was like two a month at one point. speaker-1: was the last year was a lot, but this year it's like, I think once a month average. speaker-2: My last point of curiosity is how long are these events? speaker-1: So the like two days to four speaker-2: That's a lot of dancing. speaker-1: days. It's like pretty long. EDC is like literally it's like a nocturnal, know, it's so it's like at night. So it goes on to sunrise. It's so super nice. speaker-2: okay, so it goes so it's like working third shift. Yeah, yeah. It's third shift dancing. speaker-1: Yeah, yeah 2 a.m.. Yeah, it's speaker-2: I love it. That's cool. speaker-0: Cool. Yeah. I mean, that's that's like some of my favorite stuff you put on social media. So I I definitely wanted to hit on that quite a bit today. But I think today's conversation's gonna be a little different than some of our previous episodes. I think this one's gonna be a little less about business and more about like becoming people that we're comfortable being and happy being. all three of us have b are business owners. but I don't think that's the most interesting thing about any of us. Yeah. I think it says a lot about us that we were willing to take that leap. Yeah. The speaker-2: Mm-hmm. speaker-0: the big like kind of topic of like this year's podcast episodes has been like the journey, like how did we become who we are and where it took. and I've only known you for a few years, but just judging by some of the pictures you post on there, like what would Mindy from ten years ago think about Mindy today? my god. speaker-2: Fantastic question. For real. I love that question. And now I'm excited for the answer. speaker-0: Because sh like just like everyone should go follow Mindy's really fun stuff on the internet. But like she will like like unashamedly post like her picture from ten years ago next to her picture dancing at the Red Rocks, like next to each other. Yeah. Yeah. speaker-1: you speaker-0: So what ten year Mindy ten years ago, what was she like? speaker-1: I, you know, like, I think the 10 years ago I was so stuck in like a box and kind of like what I think the society want us want me to be and and I think still today a lot of people are still like that. You know, I if I were to look back like the 10 years ago, right that he would look at this meeting be like, my gosh, so unprofessional crazy like, whoa, like, you know, my gosh, what would people think about her, you know, that that's like, you know, like what the 10 years ago like what what I would probably say about this man. speaker-0: You know what? And I think it's a perfect illustration that being genuine to yourself is where growth happens because you think about it now, you're you y what you saw is unprofessional, but you have a booming business. speaker-1: Yes, exactly. speaker-0: And the same thing with me, like I came in and you know, my dad had his way of doing things and I decided I was gonna do it my way. I was gonna be me. Yeah. And my business grew like huge. So yeah, I love that. speaker-2: Do you think that boils down to like cause that this is a thing that I have and I think I've mentioned it before is like, don't tell me how to work. speaker-0: I I think that's speaker-2: But I mean but I mean like it kind of like to what you said, like your dad did things you know, his way, but then you were exposed to new ways of treatment and whatnot, right? So then you're like, hey, I'm I'm implementing this now. And it's not like a brat, but like, don't tell me what to do, right? But then like, you know, and for you, right? Like sh it's probably no different, right? Like you got this far because you're like, no, I know what I'm doing. Yep. Right? Mm-hmm. Don't tell me what to do. Until I need someone to tell me what to do. speaker-1: Yeah Yeah, there's no blueprint to you know, like just doing what you love and kind of like You know the feel that you're in whatever it is your business and things like that. It's like, you know, there's no Formula that you have to follow this formula speaker-0: Right. speaker-2: It's cliche though, right? Because it's like if you love what you do, it doesn't feel like work. speaker-1: Yeah, it doesn't. speaker-2: I I speaker-0: There are days I do feel like work no matter what you do. speaker-2: There are a couple of days I may have banked my head up against so well this week. No, I'm just kidding. But like but no, but I mean for the majority of the time, I love what I do. speaker-1: Yeah, me too. speaker-2: You know, and that's a great feeling. And not a lot of people have that. So like I think we gotta lean into that more, right? And embrace it. speaker-0: Yeah. I I agree. I mean, I think it also cut like tails back to it's how you how you make people feel. So like if you're a really good therapist and and they're like get feeling like they're like getting better because you're working with them, they're less likely to give any cares about what's going on outside of work. And it's the same thing at the dental office. Yeah. Same thing with photography, I would imagine. Yeah. Yeah. speaker-1: Well, it's, I think this is where my theoretical identity kind of shift is when I started helping clients and I encouraged them to, you know, just be who they are and that, you know, like you're not stuck in a box. then here I am like sitting across from them and like, my gosh, I'm like, you know, like I'm telling them to do all these things. And yet here I am like, I'm like, you know what I mean? Like, I'm human too. it's like, you know, speaker-0: It was time to practice what you preached? speaker-1: I should, you know, and, then and then I realized that, you know, a lot of my clients, they actually really do appreciate like, kind of like, this transparency that I have, like, no, just realness. Yeah, I am real. And you know, like, I'm another human out there. I make it very clear, like, you know, I'm no better than you. Like, there's no such thing as like, you know, like me and you and we're all human and know, therapists, know, we all have issues too. speaker-0: Therapists have therapists. speaker-2: Do dentists have dentists? speaker-0: Yes. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah, I think we it and I I I like that idea because I was gonna ask, like, was it like during therapy that you realized that you needed to like get out of your shell a little bit? yeah. Yeah. speaker-2: Mm. Well what was that turning point though? Like that you really were speaker-0: Like a moment. speaker-2: Yeah, where you're like, I gotta make a shift here if I'm going all in on this, you know, this journey, this path. speaker-1: Yeah, I think so. You know, I started a business in 2020. I felt like at that point was really good. And my business grown a lot. And then 2023, I just felt that life was just kind of like, you know, it's just, I mean, it's great, you know, but then I'm like, you know, where is my identity? Like, who am I? You know, am I just like, the person sitting in that sofa over there and helping people? I'm like, I'm a person too and like I you know, like I think I always felt like I have an identity but then it's always been school and a therapist speaker-0: Yes. speaker-1: and I'm like, there's more to life than that. speaker-0: Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, I think it's like a almost it seems like almost a reinvention. Yeah. speaker-1: yeah. speaker-0: Like was w like you're really open about like your cosmetic procedures and things like that. It's like you're all about it. And that makes it makes it so much easier for people to talk about. Yeah. Because it you are just like right away just challenging that stupid stigma. Yeah. so Own your glow. Own your glow. Yeah. Trademark. was there like What was w was it EDM festivals or was it did you have a cosmetic procedure that like kicked this thing off it was a festival. So speaker-1: No, it's the, it's the fast one. Yeah. speaker-0: you were just like at a festival and you're like, I want big bright white teeth, or I want bigger lips. speaker-2: Yes, say more. speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: So I saw this girl. So the first time I went, you know, I didn't really know much about it. I think we, my husband and I were like, you know, we didn't knew things in our life because I felt like, I'm like, dude, we've done a lot of things. We've traveled the world. I'm like, you know, let's just try something new. This is something that we've always loved, but the stigma, there's so much stigma behind it. And we're like, we're like, everybody we know are just kind of like, you know, like the people who are like save their whole paycheck for it. But then speaker-0: For the E DM festival. speaker-1: Yeah, And we tried it. And then I remember I looked to a girl, she was doing a shoulder ride and she was just like having the time of her life. And I looked at her and I'm just like, dude, she's so cool. And then I talked to her and she's like a doctor. speaker-0: I'm like dude. speaker-1: Dude, that is so amazing. And then I'm like, I'm going to be you next year. speaker-0: Ha ha ha. speaker-1: I'm like this girl right here. I like next year. I'm gonna look like that and then I did speaker-0: You just did it. So that was like the mindset shift. You were like, That girl looks hot. Yeah. I wanna look hot. Yeah. And she's a there you go. speaker-1: And she's so successful. And then the person giving her the shoulder ride was also very successful. And then all the people around, and as I get to know them, like, no, they're not your college dropout or whatever. Living in their mom's basement, a lot of these people are very well-off. They're actual professionals. speaker-0: Yeah, yeah. So they had their their way to like like vent and like get out there and like decompress. Yeah, and express themselves. speaker-2: That that could could we though go back to a second for about the like just owning it, right? And that kinda I kinda wanna pair that a little bit with TDFA. Yeah right with the owner globe, right? Because like everything that you just spoke about was really the foundation and the DNA for the direction that Dr. E and I took it. Yeah. Because we were writing the brand for TDFA. speaker-0: When we were writing the brand. Might have been thinking about Mindy several times alone speaker-2: But really like I mean and even like, you know, from a gentleman's perspective, it was just like, Look, man, if you wanna make if you wanna do the maintenance, like whatever it is, own it. Yeah, right. Like everything. Everything was all so all the messaging is all around, you know, owning your glow, saying F to the naysayers. Right. And it's just like, look, man, own it. You don't have to prove anything to anybody but yourself. Yep. Right. speaker-0: We wanted it to like echo towards male clients too because so many men are like scared. Like, I don't want to get Botox, and people think I'm some like frou-frou, blah blah blah. Rule speaker-2: Or hair removal, right hair. speaker-0: your neck, like that's or anywhere. Yeah, yeah, speaker-1: Or lipo speaker-0: anything. Yeah, anything. Yeah, like every time I like talk to like a patient and they're like Well I really want my teeth to look good, but I don't know, blah blah blah blah blah. And I'm like, dude, it's just like if you want it, do it. Like s who cares? If it makes you happy, do it. Yeah. And speaker-2: Exactly. speaker-0: like like right now, like my wife's pregnant and because she can't get Botox, I'm not allowed to get Botox. And I'm really not liking it, right? speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: But yeah, I think I think we really wanted to like create an environment like that. And I you know, you somewhat inspired me when we first started speaker-2: It also goes back to like what with the EDM, right? Like it there's a judgment free zone. Yeah. Right? Like judgment free zone, own it. Yeah. It just it really is. Like and it felt very strong and the feedback's been great. speaker-0: I think it's yeah, and I think probably at those festivals too is like you've got a bunch of people who are already successful, they're comfortable in their own skin. Those types of people are not going to be as judgmental. Like you're comfortable with who you are and you have confidence. Yeah. speaker-1: Exactly. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, you know. speaker-2: If you ever like what if you ever move past the EDM thing, I think like a Comic Con thing, you would sh speaker-0: He goes to that too. speaker-2: my god. You guys I w okay, so in twenty seventeen I went to a Comic Con in Indianapolis with my brother. San Diego? No in Indianapolis. Indianapolis. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-2: Yeah. So I went there and I went there with my camera, a speed light, and one modifier. And like All these folks were so dressed up and to the point of like so comfortable with themselves. I did like I think a hundred portraits of people there. yeah. And I got it. I wrote a blog on it and Petapixel in the photography community is quite big. They picked it up, you know, which was really cool. speaker-0: Have I ever showed you my Jedi armor and Desiree's like Wonder Woman outfit we did for that speaker-2: Why have you not? speaker-0: is so cool. Yeah, I made like armor and for as a Jedi right after we got married, and Desiree had like a full breastplate and corset thing going on. That is so cool. speaker-2: I love that. speaker-0: But yeah, we had a great time. Yeah, I would do next time you go to an EDM fest, you just invite John. He's gonna do a whole like blog on it with the photos. Dude, the outfits there, you would enjoy capture. speaker-1: Yeah, I do. Yeah, I do comic cons and things like that, too. I would love to go to the San Diego one. Isn't it happening like pretty? It's speaker-2: I think you're right. Cover it up. speaker-0: Yeah, I think it's an August using. speaker-1: coming up. I know my auntie and my, some of my best friends, we went as Huntrix. Yeah. Yeah. We were pretty popular. What's his name? Justin Pesce. I don't know. Like his name is Justin P something, but he does like videos for C2E2 and all that. And he did a cool video of us. It was so nice. Yeah. Pretty popular. speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-2: Alright, so I guess then the Comic Con stuff we already checked the box up. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Alright. I'm all out of ideas there. So sorry. I'm sorry. speaker-0: but yeah, circling back and like going to these EDM festivals, getting your cosmetic procedures that you felt that you wanted and helped you feel better about being in your own skin. I think it's about investing in yourself. And it's the same thing when I have patients come to me for Imbezillion veneers or just to get their mouth healthy. and I think you and I have talked about this. And if not, we're just on a parallel path, is that I think you and I both believe that there is like a healthy level of vanity. Yeah. where's that line go from toxic vanity to just good self care, do you think? Thank you. speaker-2: Yeah. That's a really good question. Welcome. speaker-1: I like it gets to a point where, you know, I think there's definitely like a component to it where, you know, sometimes like what reason are you doing it for? know, sometimes it's like you get kind of like consumed in yourself, whatever you're doing. And then, you know, are you doing it for others? to, you know, to whatever it is, X, Z, or is it for you to be happy? And, and it is, there is a mental health piece. speaker-0: I would agree. Yeah. speaker-1: There's that, you know, but, you know, what do they call it? But body dysmorphia and all that. Yeah. Yeah. speaker-0: Yeah. Yeah, I have a you know, we have different people in and like w when I first started getting in facial aesthetics or veneers or things like that, like there was a lot of people who are like, like you're you're dealing with body dysmorphia here, and I'm like, but then there's also this level of like I'm not doing any harm by doing this cosmetic procedure for them. Yeah. They're feeling better about it. The problem is is when they keep coming back to me over and over and over and wanting me to tweak something that is not noticeable to anyone. speaker-1: Yeah speaker-0: So if I get somebody comes in and they're like the veneer is like slightly Point here on this little edge. I'm like, if I touch it, you're gonna hate it. Yeah. And I can't fix it. I bet you ran into that a lot in photography. John speaker-2: my gosh. yes, dealt with that to the point of where like I felt really bad for individuals that were like picking apart themselves. Yeah. You know, like I hate my nose or I hate my chin or I hate my left ear, or my, you know, left eye, you know, squinches more than my right eye. You know, it's like stuff like that. It's like I'm sorry, that's what you got hooked up with. Yeah. You know, like that's a line that I've actually started using. And like when I'm having my sessions, you know, I hear these things, I'm like, Look, that's what you got hooked up with. You know, I'm sorry, look my hair fell on my back. That's what I got hooked up with. Yeah. You know, like look at this, see this? You know? So like it's just like I and I I deal with it and I I guess I have the personality to just accept who I am. Like, you know, I like me. Yeah. I do. I like me. I'm good with me. speaker-0: fortunate and then there are people who like I want to do this or that I bigger lips I want Botox I want cosmetic procedure and just if if it makes you happy speaker-2: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like me better 'cause I lost thirty five pounds, right? But I still liked me before that. Yeah, yeah. I do. speaker-0: But now you like yourself more and I speaker-2: And my close foot better too. Yeah. speaker-0: W when you see people get like healthier or go through those like moments where they get something done and their confidence goes up, does their mental health get better? Really? Do you see it with your clients ever? Yeah. Yeah for sure. speaker-1: Yeah, yeah, I can see that. speaker-2: So like and then you see it though. You see it with you see it with people that you work with. Yeah, yeah. speaker-1: Yeah, it's definitely the model that I use with my practice is like It's like the CVT model like when you think how you think affects how you feel and how you feel like reinforces the behavior and then the behavior Reinforces the way you think you get it. So like it's just a triangle. So yeah speaker-0: that just goes and it goes around and around. Yep. Yeah, I would say that too. Like you see people who get like they get healthier and then you know, now I want I want to look different. Okay. Now I'm I'm looking different. man, I want to spend more time on taking care of myself. Yes. Yeah like it it it speaker-2: Yeah. I mean, it it's with a lot of things too, like even making other choices. Like p their I have very good friends are like, I'm done drinking alcohol. Yeah. They didn't have a problem. They were just like, Done. Mm-hmm. know? Like, don't eat it. Mm-hmm. speaker-1: I would encourage like that processing like whether you're an internal processor an external processor Yeah, you know, I think that's the most important piece to like speaker-0: What can you explain though? speaker-2: Just I I'm very curious, like I wanna hear your take on internal versus external in great detail. speaker-1: Okay, so yeah, therapy time. know, like so external processing is like talking. It's like doing talking is like that very physical, like, know, to really just kind of make sense of things. So a lot of people, you know, they talk. a lot of my clients who come and see me, I'll tell them, you're such an external processor because you really need to talk about these things to kind of figure it out. Sure. And I do that. I always encourage that, the external processing, even to your wife. To your family to your friends and two strangers, you know, sometimes we're like, why do you talk so why do you flex so much? Why do you blah blah blah? No, you're just an external processor. Yeah speaker-2: Overshare. speaker-1: No, you're not you're externally processing, you You're an externo processor. speaker-2: Yeah. speaker-1: you're not flexing. You're not oversharing. Like, you know, you're literally processing. And then, you know, I think, I think like people, right? You know, like people's opinion. Ah, you're flexing oversharing, you know, and then that stops people from processing externally. And then they kind of start internal internalizing. And then when you start internalizing, I mean, you're still processing, but it kind of gets you to like different, you know, just different. parts that can be problematic. speaker-0: Absolutely. So the indo internal processing would be like more meditative points of speaker-1: You can definitely yep. Yep. So a lot of people are really good at hype like, know kind of hyping themselves out or telling themselves like hey, you know, got this I can do this. speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: it makes sense of like things I was never a really like i'm not really good at internalizing internal processing I usually start internalizing it and then it starts going you know different direction speaker-2: Yeah we go. speaker-1: But yes, there you go. But some people are good at it. Some people are just like my sister is really good at just you know, kind of like taking in information and making sense of it in her head and then I kind speaker-0: So the figuring but what where that could get like unhealthy is when it's like keeping you up at night 'cause that's when you start processing. speaker-1: Yes! speaker-2: And I feel that to my core. 'Cause it's like there's a balance there 'cause you know, like I'm the, you know, the external you know version and I know that. And as I get older, I really do try hard to be a better listener and internalize and digest, not react. Right? Not react, internalize, take a step back, know myself that like I have to battle, I have to use all my positive energy to defend the negative energy to be like Don't go down this rabbit hole. You need to take a step back. There you go. And you need to clear your head. And speaker-1: internal problems. speaker-2: you know what? It does work. Yeah. It totally speaker-1: Yeah, it does. speaker-2: works. speaker-1: Interim processing. But yeah, I encourage like, definitely like, you know, I think going back to the when is the limit to, you know, like, looking better or whatever it is, I think it's the processing, like, try to process about it. speaker-0: Right. And not be jumping to the next block. speaker-1: People who don't really process about it. I feel like that's when it can really cause them to, you know, like, like, he's a spiral and all. speaker-0: Anyway, circling back, like I think a w a lot of the things that we've talked about and probably connects all three of us professionally, is like helping people build confidence with themselves through photography mentally. what is a message you're giving patients who are struggling over and over again with confidence? speaker-1: Yeah, I think it's back to like that processing and kind of like, just these, think this is when I talk about processing, right, there's a lot of ways to do it. But I think confidence, really, are you able to have a dialogue with yourself on certain things? And I think like, that that really that's important, because I think confidence, right comes from within, you know, speaker-0: Is it tied to happiness then? speaker-1: Yes, absolutely. Confidence, there's definitely, yeah, confidence and happiness. Yeah, the, what is it? I did a lot of undergrad stuff, research with us, life satisfaction scale. yeah, so confidence and, yeah, I know, it's like, speaker-2: No, I love the sound of it. speaker-1: back to school, you know. So yeah, and then the objective of happiness and so I did a lot of research with that speaker-0: Yeah. What is something you think like like like what is there something you're seeing a lot with people like lately where it comes to like the comp like their confidence is getting impacted? Is it like social media? Is it like is it the people around them more? Like what is it? speaker-1: Yeah, so we always go off of like like the biopsychosocial model so by all you know There's chemicals within you that you can't really control right that will cause you feeling down or up or whatever it is and then there's that social piece, That's the piece where the people you surround yourself with your environment Sometimes people you know, you can't really it sometimes you can't control us. Sometimes you can't same thing with the bio The chemistry because you can take meds, right? and then, there's that psychological piece. Yeah. So, and that's where therapy comes in, right? speaker-0: Right. speaker-1: How to kind of process and how to make sense of. speaker-0: Yeah, and I think like I what when I first got out of dental school, like dental schools I I've talked about it many times on this podcast already. It it sucks. And you're like you come out of it and you're like speaker-2: No. speaker-0: No, but dental schools can suck. but you know you're kind of like mentally beat down for like four or five years and you you get out of it and then you enter per a profession that's very difficult to get mentally like beat down again. So like one of the first things I did was like I started calling therapists. You were not available. speaker-1: Bye! speaker-0: Your whoever picked up the phone turned me away right away. So speaker-2: For me. speaker-0: it was before I met you. I speaker-1: Yeah! that's crazy! Yeah. speaker-0: don't know if I ever told you that. but I found somebody to I can just like sit down and like just vent my frustrations and it's that external processing. And I think for anyone in professional settings it's a like a valuable thing. Therapy is like extremely I always say it's making sure that I have someone to like yell and bitch at that's not my family member. speaker-1: You kind of need you if you really need to let that those like feelings and thoughts out otherwise it's gonna come out some You speaker-0: In a much more speaker-1: know whatever it speaker-2: What if you are a person that like can't control the feelings and it it comes out, you know, like you have a problem, how you let it out? Like how would you coach on that? I might be mildly asking for a speaker-0: Ha ha ha! speaker-1: Well, I would say that that everybody do have like control to a certain extent I think is the part of is just learning on on how to do it and how to slow down and Really? I I think that this and this is where therapy comes in too because therapy rates all about talking It's all about that external processing and really like I always go back to like making sense of certain things I think that When you're able to do it in a controlled environment with your therapist, you know there, like you'll be able to kind of... break things down and understand that, why do I do that? What is the purpose of that? What does that achieve? What is the end goal? Does that, whatever, X, Y, and Z, what is the trigger? So once you figure all of that out and you're able to just pinpoint the behavior, the action, or whatever it is, that would really help you to control, control, not be able to do things in a more, in a way that you would think that's more control. speaker-2: Well, and with your guidance, like for me, it took me a long time. But for me, it was the resolution that I needed to happen. There you go. And that like and my patience for the resolution was that big. Right. And then like my patience drove the negative. Right. Like and and that's what I've been working on. Yeah. You know, like being patient, understand that. There's going to be a process. Can't fix this right now. Yeah. Yeah. You know, like stuff like that. Like I have to tell myself this. Yeah. Yeah. speaker-1: And I would say, still remind myself, well, I always tell my clients this, too. You're not that important people when they have issues. speaker-2: my god, that's what he told my dad about his passwords. speaker-1: Like you know like people's issues they're mad at you. that's that's there You know like that's in there. They're allowed to and even when people talk poorly about you there They have every right to yeah, you know like yeah, and you're not that important when people say things or do things or whatever Yeah, that's Yeah, yeah, yeah, not everybody's like, you know, so then I always try to think about that and not personalizing it. So, you know, like, I'm not that important to you. So, you know, when you're having offers with me, it's really not about me. Right. Yeah. So it's like, you know what I mean? Or when you're upset at certain things, like, it's really not, you know, like you are just a tiny part of whatever it is that's happening, even though they're telling like, even though you get the, you know, short end of the stick there. Hehehehe speaker-0: Yeah. I like that because it's something I deal with with clients a lot or and patients they come in for lip filler and they're like, I don't want anyone to know I had anything done and I'm like, Then then why are you d doing it? speaker-2: I mean it's gonna be a noticeable difference, right? speaker-0: You want to look better or different, right? Yeah, but I don't want anyone to Okay, well so we have to figure out like where's the back control speaker-2: Well now, but is it your job 'cause they're here, they made the appointment, they're pay like they're not leaving here without paying. Yeah. Right? So like speaker-0: It can be frustrating. speaker-2: Right. Yeah. So I mean like so because like you're like, Man, I got somebody waiting in the other room. Yeah. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: And that is so hard to deal with, like with a a patient or a client that comes in and they don't know what they want and they can't articulate it to me. And I would say a bunch of the like probably more than half the time, it's because they're thinking what other people are gonna think. speaker-1: Yeah speaker-2: You know, but you but I think like, you know, man, I'm gonna go with the I think you're set up for success here because like with your business and the owner globe brand positioning right, you can nip that right in the butt and it's like, look, here's the deal. Here's why we are what we are. speaker-0: Yeah. And I think it comes back to that like healthy level of vanity. I love it when I get these old ladies in their 70s who come in and they're like, I want invisign, I want veneers, and I and I'm like, Great. the best compliment I got, This guy came in, we did a full set of new teeth for him, like all of 26 crowns in veneers. And he's like, Dr. Elliot, these look so good. I've instructed my kids to put your card in between my teeth when I'm in the coffin. That is like eight speaker-1: 70 speaker-0: years old, I'm like speaker-2: Google view that right now. Yeah, that's amaz and post that shit on social media. speaker-0: Super cool. just like I'm like this is the mentality. Like and then you get the people who are like who come in and they're like in their sixties and like I'm getting too old for that. And I'm like, I've got patients in their hundreds. Like I don't know. speaker-1: You're never too old. speaker-2: Well and especially like you gotta take care of the mouth. Yeah. speaker-0: I think it's a stigma we deal with maybe in our community. It's getting better for sure. But what made you come back to Sheboy again? 'Cause you didn't go to school here, did you? you grew up here. speaker-1: Yeah, I grew up here and then I was like, I'm never coming back. speaker-0: That sounds like a familiar story. speaker-2: What high school did you go to? speaker-1: North High, didn't have a good, I mean I didn't really have a good speaker-2: I went to So I went to South. speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: Red wings. Yeah, my high school. I mean, I really didn't have like, I really didn't have a good reputation. I really didn't have a whole lot. My identity in Sheboygan was just like, you know, still today when people see me, they're like Mindy. I'm like, Oh yeah, don't think about that Mindy. But it's like, speaker-0: So where'd you go to school then? speaker-1: um, white, UW Whitewater. And then I got like, um, and then after that, I got a bachelor in psychology. I'm like, dude, what am I gonna do? I started working in Rogers. And I worked in like the inpatient unit. I'm like, you know what? I'm like, I'm pretty good at this. So I went on and I right away did my masters and I was like thinking of a psychology that I want. I chose counseling. then, and then after that, I got a lot of like job offers, like almost everywhere. But then I got offered here for private practice. So I was like, you know what, I've tried everything like in pain, like I've tried like, like those big, you know, like hospitals, I've tried clinics, I've tried outpatient inpatient. So I'm like, I want to do private practice. I and then I did it and I really liked it. So speaker-0: You're Hmong, right? Yeah. Yeah. I think it's really cool because the Hmong community didn't I don't think I like is so my wife's have Filipino and like therapy is not part of their culture. yeah. Did you run into that too? speaker-1: Yeah, I'll be completely transparent and I tell like people Yeah, speaker-2: I was thinking you would be. speaker-1: so I became a therapist because I got mandated therapy when I young Had speaker-2: Okay, that is funny. speaker-1: a tough like I had a tough like You know like growing up right so I would never go to therapy like if I didn't have to buy I had to go to their mandated but But that really changed my life and it gave me like a different perspective about life and everything and then even the career within itself. speaker-0: you're bringing that back to a community that really needed it and into like a culture that probably needs it too. speaker-2: Well, on mental health, right? Like I mean and I it's way I think it's way more accepting now, right? Like I know when I was younger to you know, just be like, dude, you gotta take care of yourself. And part of and part of that is your mental health, right? And some people, right, like they they can't. Mm mm. They need the assistance and that's why there's people like you. Yeah. Thank you for being you. speaker-1: Thank you. I try you know, but but yeah, but it's like it's needed like and then I saw that how much it helped me like literally saved my life so Then speaker-0: That's awesome. speaker-1: like you know what? It's so powerful and yet like people don't if there's so much stigma and I think at that point There's still a lot of stigma. speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: There wasn't a lot of I'll be honest I did not have like during that time when I was like that age. Let me see 14 15 I did not have like a pool of therapists to pick from speaker-0: Right. That's about a big it's a big problem everywhere. Yeah. That's awesome that you have so many people now. You said fifteen speaker-1: Yeah, so like my practice, you know? speaker-2: Well and it can be like, you know, a little more intimate too, where like you could do it virtually. Yes. Right? Like So how much actually how much in person versus virtually do you do? speaker-1: So I'm not a very okay. I'm be honest with you. I thought I would like virtual I'm not I'm not a virtual person speaker-0: Alright. speaker-1: Hands on and I like to do all those the home therapy in the community. So that's kind Yeah, speaker-0: People's places too. speaker-1: so the program that that I in my practice, know, we do the ccs program So yes, we do like community home office. So so it's like community service like a lot of community speaker-0: That's awesome. speaker-1: And therapy and all that. But yes, a lot of a lot of my providers do do telehealth. And I think that it that's always an option for all my clients. So all of my clients, even though I see them in person, all of them, think at least like a couple times a year will do telehealth because of whatever they're sick or whatever. speaker-0: Yeah, I've I've had one of my sessions virtually, I think. and it's fine, but it i I would agree it's not the same. We're actually gonna try that in dental doing like telescreenings for like if people are coming in for like they're wanting cosmetics speaker-2: You're removing a barrier to execution. Right. Because like getting them here is speaker-0: And the the other problem is is like bringing them in when we like I just want to console for veneers and we haven't like actually figured out if they're a good veneer candidate. Yeah, yeah. or a good implant candidate. Like that that screening and that like that conference call with one of my better trained assistants or one of my front desk is gonna be super helpful. speaker-2: Absolutely. And and it's more accepted now. Like, you know, even when I started when I started my business, you know You did a lot. A lot of like we did a virtual meeting. Like I I never even met him. And I got the request come in. And then I was like, Well, let's set up a meeting. Cause I was really big on like meeting people. Yeah. Like first. Because like I there's like a I this sounds weird. But like I feel people's energy. I'm saying it. See, like, okay, you're inspiring me. Thank you. I feel it. And like sometimes I feel it across the state, like from my sister. Anyways, but like it, I I had this like, and I couldn't get rid of it. Like, I have to meet this person before they get in front of my camera because like I need to know what I'm dealing with. But now my confidence has risen because I'm very comfortable with my skills, I'm comfortable with my personality. being able to meet people where they are, right? And then like I try to match what they're giving me. Mm-hmm. But then still be a professional. So you know, it's yeah, it's a thing, man. speaker-0: yeah, cranking it back to like the of like meeting people where they're at like when you get a client who comes in or if you're talking to anyone who might be asking you about like cosmetic surgeries that you've experienced or things like that, like self-investment isn't selfish. Like if I got someone who comes in and they want Botox and they want laser hair removal with one of my n with my nurses or something like that, Like if it's gonna make you feel good, go for it. Exactly. Like, you don't mind talking about it, what's something you've spent money on that people might be judgy about? But you'd absolutely do it again. speaker-1: my gosh, I'm so transparent about my clients because I'm like at first I'm like, know what? like I could totally just tell them that I got a procedure done But they're gonna see it they're gonna know and they're gonna be like we know you got a BBL like you got a BBL. I'm So yeah, so I I've got a BBL three times My third time recently, you know, but I'm still I'm still in the healing process and you know, like speaker-2: Is is that the Brazilian butler? speaker-0: John knowing this stuff over here, yeah. speaker-2: Say more. speaker-1: I've gotten a lot of things I'm very transparent about it because obviously if you look at my old photos you I speaker-0: Do look a little different. speaker-1: know I do look very different and it's like know and and I actually embrace it because I love it, know, like it's like technology and science like, know, that's own different, you know, area but I just appreciate, know, that science is this amazing. Yeah, like aloe clay. Have you heard of The fillers the aloe clay filler is like it's new. speaker-0: I haven't heard of that one. yeah. Yeah, I gotta check it out. Yeah, check it out. Yeah, for like the facial fillers. speaker-1: what is that? I think they use a facial too, but yeah, but but it's very new right now. It's from cadavers, but speaker-0: Okay. speaker-1: it's like a different speaker-0: yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the liquid fat that you can Yes, yeah, yeah. speaker-1: Yeah, and that is so amazing. I don't know. Like it's like, because right now. speaker-2: You said that and I started cringing. speaker-0: You know what? They pull it from other places and put it in other places on you too. A lot of like breast augmentations are now done. Like they'll put the implant in and then they'll take like fat from other places in your body to like even it out. Yeah it's okay. So speaker-2: Yeah. speaker-0: they're trying to like make it so like people who have like not enough fat they there's an alternative. speaker-2: And like you I've learned from you that like there's a level of shaping. Yes. Yes. Right. Like and that's part of the crap. speaker-0: With lips, cheeks, any type of color. Yeah. speaker-1: here. speaker-0: Yeah. Absolutely. speaker-1: So yeah. speaker-2: I appreciate your energy. Yeah. speaker-0: Yeah, so do I. speaker-1: I've done a lot, I've done a lot of like procedures and I'm very transparent about it because I think people don't talk about it enough, especially like, you know, like when I got all my surgeries done, I didn't know anyone else who got like a mommy makeover like, speaker-0: Right. speaker-1: so then I'm like, ooh, who do I? speaker-2: So when did you when did you start getting procedures done? speaker-1: last year, well, fillers and Botox I've always, I mean, I've done that for a long time since 2020. but, the actually getting like, big procedures done where going under, January, 2025. So that was my first. speaker-0: She's been through her journey and the journey's been quick. speaker-1: Yeah speaker-2: Okay. huh. So was that your BBL? speaker-1: I did a lot. So I got like a full blown like mommy makeover, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, thigh lift, arm lift, butt lift, ana BBL, and then I got a chin jaw lipo. speaker-0: And you were like I remember you coming in like right after that surgery and you're like, Look at me and I'm speaker-1: I'm like, here I am! speaker-2: Love it. speaker-0: Yeah, it's great. And you can see the confidence like in the pictures, like side by side from Mindy 10 years ago to Mindy now. And I think that is like a like that's a testament of self-investment is not selfish and there is a healthy level of vanity. absolutely and like speaker-1: So so yeah, you're talking about that post that I did. Yeah, yeah. know. speaker-0: You've done it more than once, I think. speaker-1: Yeah, so I'm very transparent about it. I have a bunch of new followers and I'm like, I'm like, you know what, I don't want them to just think that, this person is always like, I'm like, dude, you know, it's a journey, you know, it's okay. speaker-0: What's the best compliment you've ever received? speaker-1: Compliment. me. I'm not really good with compliments. I like you but I think one of the compliments that someone has told me is like they really like how I'm comfortable with in my skin and I really like that because I'm like you know you're right I am very comfortable with speaker-0: Great. speaker-1: like with my skin and who I am so I like that speaker-2: Well, you give off great energy. You know. Well no, for real. But I think that's half of it, right? Like there's a physical part, these there's the emotional part, and it's what you give off is what people get. Yeah. And the less that people are trying to defend what you're putting out, right? Like the more that you know they want you to come into their little circle. Yeah. speaker-0: You know, I like this ties way way back. Like I finally started feeling like myself when I like had my band going. Like I was such a nerdy, like I grew up in a really like supportive household, but it was very like traditional Midwest Christian family, like and it was nothing wrong with my upbringing, don't get me wrong. But like at the same time I didn't feel like the outlets to express myself until I got into music. And then I started getting tattoos and that's like when I felt like myself. Yeah. And like, and like getting on stage and performing in front of people, that's like I f like at my energy got better. Yeah. and I think that's when I started really becoming the person that I am today. And I think I'm like I'm still evolving. Like who who like for me, yeah. Yeah, what I'm becoming right now is like more of like like a clinically f Like I started this journey like focusing really on the business and now I've handed off certain parts of the business to someone else. So like I'm becoming a better clinician, I always say like who are you becoming right now? Yeah. Yeah. speaker-1: I would say similar. Yeah. mean like very Ellie I'll be honest with you. Like I talk about you a lot because I feel like we do have a lot of like similarities speaker-0: Yeah, I would I would agree. speaker-1: Yeah, yeah, because I do really like how, I look at just our practice model, I really like how you started with one thing, but you're always expanding and accepting new things. I really took that and I'm like, you know... And now, now I'm doing that too. Like I'm looking to like other, other things, you know, that that's just beyond like therapy, right? That's on that part of that. anyways, yeah, speaker-0: You're looking to help people in different ways. speaker-1: yeah. And then I do like how like, um, you, you're very open about like your past and kind of like just that expression of, who you are. And I think that really did encourage me to, to, um, kind of like be expressive of who I am. Yeah, no, for real. speaker-2: I thought you were gonna say own your glow, but speaker-1: Yeah, well that is true. So like, you know, I'll just give you like example like I love how like what is that like Kayla's tattoos? Yeah, it's all over and and I love how like you guys don't try to cover it up or you know, and and it's like it's like that's a part of the brand and I love that and thank you and I take that and I'm like, you know what? I'm like, I'm I'm actually a really fun person, you know, like it's when you look at my professional photo looks I'm just like, you know, professional but you know, I'm like more than that. I'm really So I'm like, speaker-2: Para ti speaker-1: ah, yeah, so I'm like, you know what, am still like, like, I'm evolving and I like that. speaker-0: That's awesome. Well, I think we'll wrap up here. this was super fun. Like speaker-2: I had so much fun on this podcast with you. For real. I love your energy. speaker-1: Thank you, thank you. speaker-0: Same. I was I was like telling John, I'm like, dude, we've got to get Mindy out. And he's like, who is tell me more about Mindy? speaker-2: Welcome back. speaker-1: I'm not good with compliments, but I appreciate it. I appreciate it. Yeah, no, it's I enjoy these things too. speaker-0: And we like to have a conversation and we always have these outlines and when we when we start like flipping through going, is there more things we wanted to talk about? Because the conversation has gone in great directions. Yeah, it's always a good sign. So all right. this has been a great episode of Death Before Decay podcast with Dr. Elliot Hummeston. Mindy, do you have any social media stuff? Anything you want to shout out to everybody? speaker-1: What is it my Instagram is planet Mindy so it's kind of it's kind of boring It's just like about my life, but but that one. what is it? It's it's Yeah, yeah Instagram. It's public, you know speaker-0: It's a great people. So if you want to see some cool outfits and cool places on speaker-1: She's. speaker-0: yeah, check it out. and yeah, thanks for coming on. We really appreciate it. And everybody have speaker-2: Thank you so much. This was fun. speaker-1: It was so this was fun. Yeah. Thanks for having