Latest / Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie / How To Have A Juicy Relationship & S*x Life

Transcript

How To Have A Juicy Relationship & S*x Life · Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Live Well Podcast.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Liv, a naturopathic doctor, a mentor, energy healer, a cost creator, intuitive, energetic business mentor, and honestly, so much more.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: I help you heal on a physical and emotional level so that you can feel delicious in your health, body, relationships, career, and a bank account.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: This show is for those of you who are looking to go beyond the basic wellness stuff, cut out the BS and really create a life that you love.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: We talk about health, trauma healing, energetics, feminine energy, wealth, and magnetism so that you can live a life that feels delicious.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: In these episodes, we will have an honest conversation without the fluffy bullshit.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: You walk away with all of the insights, tools, and tips to truly live your best life, mind, body, and soul.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: If you are looking to live well, you are in the right place.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: For ways to work with me, visit keepupwithlive.com and follow me on Instagram at keep up with live for more.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: And with that, let's get into the show.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: Hello, everyone.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to another episode of the podcast.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: I have the fabulous Morgan with me again today.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: Hi, Morgan.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: Hi guys.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: I just love I think I just love talking to you.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: I love conversations.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's why.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: So we're bringing back again this conversation style of podcast.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: We have a juicy episode because we're gonna be talking about I kind of don't know if I can say juicy enough, how to have juicy relationships and a better sex life.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: Because who doesn't want that?
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_00: Because we I was actually looking at the podcast stuff and just looking at the like the downloads and everything, and the one about like libido and stuff like that.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: So one of the top ones.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, do y'all want this?
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: You're not saying it, but we want it, we want to listen to it.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm giving you the tea that you I know you wanted, but you didn't feel seen enough to ask for.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what we're doing today.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: I love it.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: We were just talking about how when it's dreary outside and like cloudy, it just makes you want to like snuggle up and and be just a lot more like chill.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: So we're just gonna have like a kind of like a chill conversation.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: That's the the mood, the vibe that we're going for.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: Comfy.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: So do you have anything you want to ask me right off the bat, or should I kind of like jump in?
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: I'd say let's just jump in.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: So I think the number one thing that I kind of want to start talking about when it comes to having juicy relationships is that when your nervous system is actually dysregulated, it is going to affect your relationships.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: I did a post on this, I don't know if it's oh, it might be coming out tomorrow.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: I wrote it like yesterday.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: But when our nervous system is dysregulated, right, we're in that fight or flight response that actually shuts down a lot of our pleasure centers.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: It shuts down our capacity to receive.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: And so when we think about having juicy relationships, and I especially mean like romantic partnerships, sure, friendships as well, but like the focus on it is really more romantic relationships.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_00: We all know that if you're stressed, you bring it home.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: Now, think about it, you being chronically dysregulated, how that's going to show up long term in your relationships.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: Whether you're in a long-term relationship, whether this is a repeating pattern that you bring to multiple different partners or relationships.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: That's why the role of the nervous system and healing that part is so important.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: All right, I just wanted to quickly come in here and hop in and tell you guys that we are doing something super fun for the podcast in June.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: So if you share your favorite episode to your Instagram stories and tag me, keep up with live, we are giving you a$44 credit to use towards any course, any program that you love.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: You can share any episode that you love of mine that you want other people to get value from, to learn from, anything that you're like, mm, this is so good.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: More people need to hear it.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: So just put it on your stories, tag us, like I said, make sure you tag us so that we can see, and that way we can give you a$44 credit.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: You can use this towards Land the Man, best year ever, regulate, well-nourished gauze activation, and Akashic Reading and Energy Healing.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: There's so many different options.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: Of course, you only get one credit, so if you do it once, you'll get that one credit per month.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: If you don't have Instagram, for those of you who don't, you can also leave a five-star reading and review.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: Just make sure to screenshot the review before you click submit so that you can email it to us and that way we can see that you submitted it.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: And all of that info will be also down below in the description box.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: I am so excited just to get more word out.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_00: The more we can get the word out of this podcast, the more people I can help, the more impact we can have, and the more nervous systems that we can not only get from survival into thrival mode, but even beyond thrival mode and just into that yummy, delicious life that we all want to live.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: So, that being said, thank you guys so much, and I will get back to the episode.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: Now, when your nervous system is dysregulated, like I said, your amygdala literally shuts down.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: So your amygdala is also the part that is responsible for pleasure.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: So if the pleasure center is shut down because it thinks it's you're running from a tiger, how is it gonna feel pleasure?
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: Which means that your sex life is then not only you're not gonna have as much of a libido, but it's gonna be like, uh, that kind of like that almost lazy and motivated where you don't really feel like it.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: And a lot of women, when they come to me, they're like, I just like I don't have the desire.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: Like the libido doesn't even occur to me.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: And it doesn't even occur to people because it's so shut down, because your body is still trying to process emotions and trauma that are keeping it in fight or flight.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: So just know that you really can't exist in two different states as once.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's like you can't rest and digest, and you can't, you know, be in fight or flight.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're you're one or the other.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: So, in order to really have a stronger libido, a better sex life, we A, need to get your body into more of that calm, parasympathetic state.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_00: Now, kind of like a sneaky way that this kind of shows up in your relationships and also in bed is not only the fact that, all right, we're stressed, our nervous systems are dysregulated.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, okay, I know chronic stress lowers my libido.
• 5:58
  unknown: Yeah.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: But I want to also think about how certain repressed emotions show up in your relationship.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: So let's like take the fear of being seen, for example.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: When we have a fear of being seen, it's hard for us to be seen in relationships.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: So when we're storing the trauma of, you know, yes, it's maybe fear of being seen when you were little.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: It still manifests in your current relationships.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: So that makes you less open to receive love.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: That makes you less likely to be open to a relationship in general, that makes you less likely to be seen in the bedroom, that makes it less likely to be vocal about your fantasies, that makes it less likely for you to be seen, you know, with the lights on naked.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: I remember, and like this all comes from personal personal experience.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like five, six years ago, if you told me to have sex with the lights on, I'd be like, God, no, cut the power immediately.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I was the same way, turn the lights on.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, not everybody should see me.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_00: No, and like lights off, and like there's no way that I was gonna be looked at being on top with lights on.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: There's like that is not an angle that I wish to have.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: But like, but when you heal your fear of being seen, it's like this this freedom, like this wildness of your feminine energy that can come out, and then you have a better sex life because you're not in your head about being seen, about well, how do I look from this angle?
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: What is he thinking of me?
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, does my stomach look like this, or my chin look like this, or my legs or my boobs, or I don't know, look like this?
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: You're not actually worried about that.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_00: So, can you imagine what happens when you heal your nervous system and you literally rewire the programming in your brain that tells you you need to be cautious of this or you need to like always be aware of like what your body looks like, and that's the thing with nervous systems like we literally rewire.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: We think about we control C, right?
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: We copy paste, yeah, we're changing the function in your brain, so your brain literally does not do that.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_00: Like, that's crazy.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so then you can actually let go.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: And like, as much as I love clearing, you know, people's bloating stuff like that, when clients tell me that they're having better sex and like more intense orgasms, I'm like, this is what we're here for.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: This is it, this is it, right?
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: But that's like a sneaky way.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: So like I know when people think about, oh yeah, like I'm stressed on my nervous system, and that means like I'm I don't have as high libido.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just like, can we actually go a step further than that?
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: What about like maybe you're actually chill on vacation or I don't know, but then you still have that fear of being seen, right?
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: And so that fear of being seen, sure, maybe you're not stressed out from like your work job when you're on vacation, but like you still have that fear of being seen.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's still gonna come up, right?
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_00: In your relationship and in the bedroom.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I I just I think it's so important for women to realize kind of like all the sneaky ways that it can be playing out in your relationship.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_00: And then also when we think about when our nervous system is at capacity, we're more likely to be irritable with our partners.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_00: We're more likely to have like less capacity.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: So like you're more snippy, you're more barking, you're perhaps more mothering, more emasculating.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_00: And then that doesn't foster juicy relationships.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: But when we're in the kind of like this dysregulated state, the default of your brain is gonna go to controlling, right?
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: If I can control this situation, I can maybe get out of it because the things that I can control, I can survive.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_00: So then unfortunately, women get trapped in this vicious cycle of I need to control everything around me.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: I need to emasculate the men in my life.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: Yet what I really want is to be careful, nurtured, and receive, but my brain is literally not letting me.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why women find it so difficult.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's because, yeah, your brain is not gonna let you if it's a survival mode response.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why it's very important for us to get you out of that first so that you can actually feel safe to receive, safe to not control.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: You know, and I know we're kind of jumping, but like this is like how my brain works.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: But we even think about can you receive in bed without giving back to him?
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: How many women I come to who feel guilt of like, oh, uh, guess I better like make sure he gets all like, yes, there's always a reciprocal relationship, but it's about that guilt of like maybe he gets it later.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it doesn't have to be in that moment of making sure that you have to like give and then return.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: Can you just receive and simply just receive?
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: I love this.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: The feminine is meant to receive, and that's not to say, like, you know, men are, but like men are literally programmed and wired to get off by getting us off.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, and so many women like how much time I want you to think about do you spend receiving in bed?
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: Or are you worried about a what you look like, or worry about giving to him, or are you being good enough in bed?
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_00: I guarantee you, and I've said this before, like I think two years ago in the podcast, he's just happy to be having sex.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_00: He does like I I guarantee you the things you think he's thinking, or no, what's going on in his body physiologically, he's not like, oh, if she moves this slight angle, her like no, I mean, men don't even think like that on a good day.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: No in the middle of that, but that's what like it's so important in terms of not only healing your nervous system so that like your hormones produce the hormones that actually have a libido to support you physiologically, but I also want a lot of women to think about mentally emotionally because as much as like yeah it's a physiological thing, it's also especially for women, a very mental emotional thing.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it is for men too, but it's a very much as much as a physical, it is also a mental emotional thing when we're having like intimate connections.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_00: So thinking about that and the sneaky ways that that kind of plays out is going to be very key.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so one question when you were talking about receiving, right, in bed and being able to just go and just like receive that orgasm without feeling the guilt of giving back, right?
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: And having to give more and whatever.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_01: How does that spill over in other areas?
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: So, like if you're laying in bed thinking that, where is that spilling over elsewhere then in your life too?
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: Because I think that's a huge connector that sometimes people miss is like this goes beyond the bedroom too.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, chances are if you can't receive in the bedroom, you also can't receive in other areas.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: And then that kind of like goes back, even if it's simple as, oh honey, let me clean the kitchen.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, no, I'll do it.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_00: I'll do it better.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I can just do it quicker.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just like, but then it builds resentment because it's like you actually want him to help, but when he offers to help, then you like you want to control, but like your nervous system actually needs the time to receive for it to slow down so that it gets used to what it's like.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_00: So it might be a bit challenging at first, but I want you to notice like where you actually stop yourself from receiving and block your own system from receiving because chances are you're doing it in other places as well, and that's also gonna leak in because then you're resentful.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: But again, that really comes down to the need control because you think you can do it better.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_00: And like, I'm not gonna say that maybe you can't, maybe you can clean the kitchen better, unload the dishwasher better.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_00: I guarantee you, every single time I let my fiance unload the dishwasher, at least one thing is not in the right spot.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: We've lived in this house for over a year, and somehow, it doesn't matter how many times I say that oh, this goes here, there's always something that goes, but you know what?
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's better done than me doing it.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna lie.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, like, doesn't even bother me anymore.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, oh, of course, it's more just like where where do I think he would have put this when I'm looking for it again, you know?
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: But you have to let that go, right?
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_00: And then but that need to control is your nervous system response being in its wounded masculine.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's why a lot of the work I do is not only in terms of like bringing safety to like your system to actually receive in that way, but the fear of being seen, the being at capacity and that vicious cycle that women tend to get in, where it's like they actually want to receive, they want their nervous system to slow down, it just doesn't feel safe to do so.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_00: And then kind of like even tying it in when we're talking about safety, if love doesn't feel safe, when we talk about like anxious attachment styles or avoidant attachment styles, it's very hard to have a juicy relationship if you don't feel fully safe and solid and unwavering.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: When we think about when we're in a long-term relationship, and more I can say you're like um you're married, right?
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: So you show that online.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_00: Morgan's married.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, when you're in like a long-term relationship, you relax, it's softened, it's like safer.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_00: And it but you need to give your nervous system the chance to actually do that.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: But if you don't heal, you're avoiding or anxious attachment style, it's like you're constantly living on edge, you're constantly searching, you're constantly looking for reassurance.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like, oh, does he love me?
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: How much does he love me?
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: Do you love me?
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: You know, is am I giving enough to him?
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: Was that I don't know, was that blowjob good enough?
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't like this is what you think of like, oh, he didn't have this type of reaction after sex.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I wonder, was that okay?
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: Was that like not good for him?
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I was actually watching.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if you watched the Netflix show, um, never have I ever.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's like one of those funny, like almost teenage shows, but when they're having like her and this guy, sorry, spoiler alert, her and this guy Ben eventually like have sex, and they're both like you hear the dialogue in their head of like, was that good?
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_00: What are they thinking?
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: What is this?
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, it's that anxious attachment of like you are unsure, and you're making that mean something about yourself.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_00: I just wanted to hop on and let you guys know about Wellnourished, which is truly the only program of its kind that brings together the physical with the mental and emotional healing that is required to thrive.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: Your nervous system runs the show, and we know this.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: From your gut health to your hormones, how you absorb food, metabolism, weight, skin, anxiety, the list goes on.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: This is why we can have symptoms even after we've tried everything.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_00: The clean eating supplements, moving your body, they're all good for you, but they do not work if your nervous system is in survival mode.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: When you rewire your nervous system and break out of survival mode, your body is actually able to heal.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_00: So inside Well Nourished, we do the healing on a physical level and we've released the emotions stored in your body.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: We do the deep somatic release so your body can stop getting triggered and you can release those emotions.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's eight weeks immersed with me to heal on a deep level.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_00: Every woman needs to recode her nervous system so that it's not holding her back.
• 16:53
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• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: And it's no coincidence that women not only get rid of their symptoms, but have nourishing relationships, passionate sex, more money, and get promotions.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_00: As long as you show up for yourself and allow yourself to be cracked open, it is going to transform your life.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_00: This is the missing puzzle piece you've been looking for when it comes to healing for good.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's time to glow.
• 17:16
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• 17:18
  SPEAKER_00: All the details will be left in the description box below, and I cannot wait to have you inside.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: And so your nervous system being safe is part of that, like your brain not spiraling in those kinds of scenarios, questioning your worthiness, questioning your self-esteem, questioning your body or your this or your that.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_00: So, so important.
• 17:37
  unknown: Right.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_00: And so part of like how to having a juicy relationship is making sure that your attachment style is like regulated AF.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: Huge.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: That you're not second-guessing yourself or your ability.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: And that doesn't mean that every time you have sex, it has to be the most mind-blowing, like out of this world, beating it the next time.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_00: But it just means that you don't necessarily question your worth or your esteem, or you worry about being abandoned or rejected if it's not.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_01: And like, I mean, as a long like our first couple years in our relationship where I had an anxious attachment style when I wasn't healing that was like the lowest.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_01: And because yeah, I would spend 20 hours out of the 24 hours in the day worried, like, oh, who's he texting?
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_01: Is he, is he gonna meet another girl?
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_01: Cause he doesn't like me.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, why does he suddenly have a Facebook account?
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_01: Is it because he doesn't like me?
• 18:28
  SPEAKER_01: Is he talking to this person from like I would spend more hours than like doing that than actually showing him that I loved him?
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_01: And then we'd wonder why we were constantly like at odds all the time, right?
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_01: Like, well, it's because I wasn't, I wasn't doing anything that felt good to me or made me feel better, right?
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_01: Like I wasn't healing the way I should.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_01: And that's just like a huge thing to point out is like even in a long-term relationship, right?
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I didn't get to that point where it did feel safe until I started to feel safe and until I started to heal that inside myself.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_01: So as somebody who's also done the work, right?
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_01: Like outside of, like, you know, if you're sitting there wondering if this is worth it, like a hundred percent, it changed our marriage.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_00: I love that you said this, even because you can be in a long-term relationship and still be anxiously attached in that long term.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: So, like, and how you said, like, you spent 20 out of the 24 hours, right?
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_00: Because when we think about, all right, we want yummy, juicy relationships, if you're spending 20 out of the 24 hours in like lack, scarcity, anxious, worry, fear, all this, where's there the room for the juiciness?
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I also want to bring in the fact that like the men love women who are secure and confident within themselves.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_00: Who don't get like dysregulated if they don't text them, like right, you know, it's been five minutes like, why didn't you text me when you did this?
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: Why didn't you blah blah blah?
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: It's they're like, oh.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_00: And so not only do we not want to be that person, I also want to make sure it's not going on internally.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_00: Because if it's still going on internally, you may not be saying it, but it's going on internally.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_00: Your energy will affect not only the relationship dynamic itself, but also in the bedroom.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I always felt like I was on eggshells.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like in I had a previous relationship before where I was like that and I was saying it, like, why aren't you texting me?
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_01: Why aren't you doing this?
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_01: So when we met my husband before we got married, like I would say, like, I wouldn't say it because I was trying to not be that girl, right?
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_01: But I would think it.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_01: And it was even worse because then I was constantly on eggshells and it was like, well, when am I gonna crack?
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_01: When am all of a sudden is this gonna come boiling over and he's gonna be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, no, like you're too much.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_00: I love okay, you uh I can take this two directions.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: A, I like how you said that when you don't ignore it, it's like trying to sweep it under the rug.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't mean it's not there, it's still right in you, but then and I remember being trapped in the same thing.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's like this energy of I'm too much, but not enough at the same time, which is a very fun dynamic to be in your like, I'm not enough, but I'm also too much.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember being so anxiously attached, whereas like if they didn't respond right away, if they didn't text me good morning, I'd literally spiral, be like, oh my god, they're gonna break up with me, they don't love me.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_00: And what I want to drive home is that this actually comes from this happening to you.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_00: So it's no wonder, like the reason the anxious attachment especially comes through is because somewhere either in your childhood, well, definitely childhood, but it gets re-I don't say like re-manifest, but like you attract a similar dynamic when you're older in order to try to heal it.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: So then we tend to get into situations where we're anxiously attached in like romantic relationships when we're older, and then it kind of just keeps going like that.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_00: So the reason that our brains do it because it is kind of true.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what's so hard is like you logically there is some truth to it.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_00: I can't say that, like you thinking he might leave you, you know, oh no, no, no, that's not gonna happen.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_00: He's not gonna leave.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, he might leave.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_00: And this is what I'm very honest about when I work with my clients.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, this is not me trying to like convince you that he's not going to leave.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_00: This is me saying, yeah, he might leave, but you're going to be like safe as fuck.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_00: And you're regulated and you're fine.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: And that what I think is very important to drive home is that when we're trying to even heal our anxious attachment style, you trying to tell yourself, like, no, it's okay, he's not gonna leave, this or that, is not actually productive because he might actually leave.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_00: And so there is truth to the fact that he might leave.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: But when you're regulated, it it doesn't, whether he does that or not, doesn't necessarily elicit a nervous system response.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: It might be sad, it might but sadness is different than I'm going to die nervous system response.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's also what I want to drive home.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: Is that it's because there's an element of truth to this.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember, I really think like I don't even know if I ever maybe I brought this up in maybe one of the other relationships.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um or like I think maybe the how I manifested the love of my life, I don't know.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_00: But I remember, I know like there's was a certain relationship that the universe brought me that I know looking back was like the Carla, I I call it Carla, Karma, in order to actually heal the anxious attachments.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_00: Because when I witnessed myself in it, and I was like, oh, uh oh.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like I was like, wow, this is what I needed.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_00: And it was one of these relationships where it was the most safe I had ever felt in a relationship, and then I got the rug pulled on out from under me, and it was like the most extremes of both at the same time, where it was like it would drive me to such anxious attachment, but at times feel so safe.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_00: And so that roller coaster was so big, and then you get addicted to the roller coaster because then you just want the high after the low.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_00: And so, what I also want people to know when it really comes like cultivating a juicy relationship is that the juiciness should feel safe and grounded.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: If you feel like it's a roller coaster, uh-uh.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_00: And so what happens is also we confuse boring or vanilla as like that, or like if it's actually safe and grounded, then it's boring or it's vanilla.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_00: When it may not actually be the case, it just means that you are not on a nervous system roller coaster.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_00: And even when you heal your nervous system, I actually sometimes work with women where it's like, no, this is actually just safe and grounded.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's because you're not going through this spiral, which you actually become addicted to, which has become your normal.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're not having a someone throw you into a nervous system loop, you think there's no chemistry, you think it's boring, you think it's vanilla when it's actually just safe and grounded for your nervous system.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_00: Your nervous system just doesn't know what grounded, safe love actually feels like.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, I love that.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_01: Star quote underline.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_01: That is a good one.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think I've said this before.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_00: When people come to me, like, oh, I'm with this person, I've got massive butterflies, and blah, blah.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, great, we have a karmic trauma bond.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like, if this is not what we want, people like I have butterflies and this and this.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I just like I'm so you know, I can't think of anything else.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: I can't this.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, no, no, no, no, no.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_00: And so I really want to stress like juicy relationship.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's like it's like the biting into like a peach that's juicy, but it feels like yummy and safe and grounding.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's not juicy like a roller coaster ride.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_00: And nervous is in response.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: Juicy to me is like when you you know that feeling when you get into bed at night and it's like, ah, that.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_00: Or a warm bath.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_00: It's a warm bath.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: To me, it's like juicy, warm bath, not juicy roller coaster ride.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why I also want to like just make sure I'm very specific with my language so that people don't misunder misinterpret, you know.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, it's juicy.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_00: We're on this roller coaster ride up and down, and I don't know whether these gonna text me.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_00: We play these games.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_00: Have you watched maybe oh, you know what?
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_00: This would actually be fun.
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I'll think about this and put this in the ether.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if you've watched um The Ultimatum.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_00: Have you watched the Ultimatum?
• 26:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, Netflix.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, I watched the recent season uh with like the queer love.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, this happens in all of them.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_00: This also happens in Love is Blind.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like we should do like a this like nervous system breakdown, like uh series on like these relationships, especially because uh we have some great fun coming with you guys with nervousism and relationships soon.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm watching these relationships on like the ultimatum.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: If you guys have watched it, I'm like nervous system dysregulation of like roller coasters are up and down, and we break up and we get back together and we do this and we do that, and I'm like, this is not actually what healthy relationships are supposed to look like.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_00: But we think that that's what makes them like exciting, and that's actually not true.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna make a note of this and seeing what we can like talk about because I think that'd be very interesting to talk about.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_00: The amount of times I've almost like taken the story and been like, they need to join like Reggae, they need to join attack to join this, like even in like books.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I I read a lot of like celebrity memoirs, and as they're like describing their relationships, like I just read Pamela Anderson's and I literally was like, You need to join this program.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_01: Like, can I send you this link?
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like when you were with Tommy Lee, this is what you needed.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't maybe I should uh read her book.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't read that book.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's a good, it's a quick one.
• 27:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's a good one.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, so that's what I mean in terms of like not only juicy relationships, but like a better sex life comes down to this.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you need to feel safe being seen.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_00: You need to know that like you are in a safe, stable relationship, right?
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you're scared that they're gonna reject you or abandon you, it's gonna feel hard to show all parts of you.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: And then you're gonna feel like you're too much.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: And like, I don't know you, Morgan, but I am so excited because the next round of wealth recode is officially open.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_00: This is the program that recodes your nervous system to feel safe with wealth.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_00: Receiving it, holding it, growing it, wealth of all kinds.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_00: There are live healing calls with me where we are going to be doing the deep rewiring of living beliefs, letting go of lack and scarcity in your nervous system, generational and past life trauma around money and wealth, and getting you into a state where you are living in complete overflow with wealth.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_00: This round is even more potent than before because I have unlocked new levels since the last round that are going to change everything.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: These are the shifts that have changed my life and my bank account.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_00: This is not only going to change how you respond to wealth, it is going to change your entire relationship to it.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_00: There's also plenty of time for QA and a Telegram channel to ask questions in between calls to get support.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yum.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_00: So this is for you if you want to heal your relationship with money and become a higher match for wealth and bring nervous system safety into it.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_00: Check out the link in the description.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_00: I cannot wait to see you inside.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_00: And if you have any questions, let me know.
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_00: And let's get back to the episode.
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a lot.
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_00: I already know that I'm a lot.
• 29:06
  SPEAKER_00: I own the fact that I'm a lot, I'm a lot of woman.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_00: I'm an emotional being.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I got this going on.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_00: I am like a lot, and that's okay.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_00: But I have no fears about that.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_00: I wouldn't want anyone who couldn't handle my messiness, my hot mess.
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_00: But when we think about like a juicy relationship, right?
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's like that masculine container for them to hold you in your messiness.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_00: So you're the wild water, you're a hot mess express, and they hold you and you feel so safe, and they're like that rock solid container for you to be wild in.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_00: And so I want to ask, like, you know, the audience, like people listening, do you feel like you can let out your wild woman in your relationship?
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_00: Can you be a hot mess and you know that they've got you?
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_00: You know, can you, I don't know whether you want to call it psycho, crazy, zero, and that doesn't mean that your hormones are imbalanced and we're PMSing.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_00: We got to fix that.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_00: I mean just like the natural wild woman that is the feminine, yeah, that you know, can unleash during sex, can do this, can do that, and is not, you know, worried about that.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_00: Scared, yeah.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_00: Safety is at the foundation of having a juicy relationship and a better sex life.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_00: If your nervous system is dysregulated and you're not feeling fully safe, not just in the relationship itself, but within yourself, we gotta heal that.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_00: Because you can be safe in yourself, but also be with someone who like maybe has their own stuff going on, their own wounding, and cannot create a safe space for you.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_00: So, like in a relationship, obviously it's always two to tango, but I always say heal yourself first, because if you don't heal yourself, you'll bring that unhealed part to the next relationship.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_00: So you might as well at least do the healing part.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_00: Let's heal as much of you as we can, and then we assess whether you know your partner is this and that, or what dynamic they have.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I think for a lot of women, when it comes to even like healing their nervous system in relationships, they're afraid that I'm gonna tell them that they have to leave their partner, or they're afraid that I'm gonna tell them that they have to like break up.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_00: And that's actually not I don't go there until it's like the absolute last thing.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, no, we focus on you, the safety you have within yourself, you seeing yourself.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_00: We assess how he's being, we assess your behavior in it.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_00: And then we look at can he meet you there?
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_00: How can he support you?
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_00: But like I always encourage women to take like the radical responsibility, even if you're like, well, he's not seeing me.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, well, do you see yourself?
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_00: If you have a fear of being seen, but you're complaining that he's not seeing you, where is there not congruence there?
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_00: So I don't want anyone to be afraid of like, oh, if I heal my nervous system, then they're gonna like leave, or I'm gonna have to like break it off with them.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_00: That's not necessarily the case.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I work with like lots of women who we've healed like their nervous system in their long-term relationships or marriages, and it changed that dynamic, and like they rise and meet you there because they want to support you.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_00: They normally like they they welcome these things.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_00: They actually like that you're more empowered now, they actually like that you're more confident, they actually like that, like, oh, now she walks around naked and she's like comfortable with herself.
• 32:11
  SPEAKER_00: Now she's like this, that, you know.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_00: So that's also something I want to kind of stress is that you don't necessarily have to like have a new relationship or leave a current one in order to have a juicy one or to like improve the current state of where things are at.
• 32:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's like you can heal your attachment, Sally, you can be safe in a current relationship and you can enhance it like 100%, you know?
• 32:35
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_01: I love where you said he'll rise to me because that was my partner and I, right?
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_01: Like I was like, okay, this is it.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_01: Like, this is not how I want to live, this is not how I want to feel, this is not what I want to be thinking.
• 32:44
  SPEAKER_01: Like, and it was spilling over into everywhere where I was working, like what I was doing at the time, everything.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, it's just time for something different.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_01: And then he he saw that happening and he rose and met it.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_01: Cause again, he had enough respect and was at safety, right?
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_01: I just couldn't see that that was safe, that he then rose and met me at that spot too.
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_00: I always say, like, give them the opportunity to rise, because chances are they already want to.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_00: But like it all starts with you.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember even, you know, when I was healing my nervousness when it comes to like the anxious attachment and like the fear of being seen in everyone, everything like that.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_00: The most important thing was doing it for yourself first and foremost.
• 33:30
  SPEAKER_00: And like healing for you.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_00: And that like the freedom that you feel on the other side, you won't ever want to go back.
• 33:40
  SPEAKER_00: Like you can't, you you're gonna wish you kind of like did it sooner.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_00: But it will take, and sometimes when people come to me, like, oh, I have this pattern of this, I have this pattern of this.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_00: The pattern is actually showing up because it's inviting you into like a portal of transformation for you to evolve and expand.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_00: The reason, like, you're keep getting anxious attachment in relationships is because this 3D matrix is trying to get you to heal your attachment style.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_00: Or it's trying to get you to feel safe, it's trying to get you to feel safe to be seen, it's trying to get you to get rid of the shame that you have with your body or with yourself or being too much this, or you know, what so and so did to you when you were younger.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_00: There's like and so it's not, I don't want people to get defeated, like, oh, I keep, I don't know, manifesting this or attracting this, or I keep getting into this.
• 34:33
  SPEAKER_00: It's like you keep getting into this because you keep doing the same things over and over.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_00: We like we need to like break that cycle, and it starts with bringing safety into your body, healing your fear of being seen, and knowing that that love is safe because you're safe within yourself.
• 34:49
  SPEAKER_00: And like that's the biggest gift, I think, and I'm sure you would agree, that you can give to yourself is like you feeling safe within yourself.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, oh a hundred percent.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, there's nothing, and I think I said this, I don't know, on the other podcasts, that like if something happened between me and my fiance, I am so safe in myself that like I could be sad, I would not be dysregulated because I have such safety, I don't necessarily like need him to provide that solely for me.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_00: I provide that for myself and I'm unwavering first, and it's because I have that in myself that actually allows me to relax into it.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I just want to like go into that for a second because it actually people think that there's more safety in control.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_00: No, it actually takes a lot more safety and security to let go a hundred percent like it's so much more, it's so much more trust and safety to be able to do that because you actually trust yourself when you need to control, you don't actually trust.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_00: When you need to control in your relationships, you don't actually trust.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_00: When you need to control sex, you don't actually trust.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_00: It actually takes a lot more safety to let go into what do you want to call it, like receive or like you know, any of that, and let him be that masculine container.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_00: There's a lot more safety in that because you have to know that you have you, but you can only do that when you have that safety, and that's what like it's so it's really this illusionary false sense of safety when it comes to like needing to control, or even like when it comes to like your body and what how you think of yourself physically like during sex, it's a false sense of control.
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_00: If I can look this way, if I can be this, if I can like if I was this shape, I don't know, whatever it is, then you know, we have this like illusions that we create, these conditions that we create.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_00: You know, our brain tries to rationalize, well, if I have this, then it'll be safe.
• 36:53
  SPEAKER_00: All right, if I can like give him the best blowjob ever, then he's gonna want to be my boyfriend, or he's gonna like propose to me.
• 36:58
  SPEAKER_00: Or like if I can be the type of person, if I can like shine, but not too much, but like be kind of like it's like this mind honestly fuckery.
• 37:07
  SPEAKER_00: This mind fuckery, if I can meet all these conditions and be the exact exact certain way neck and hold this position forever, then he won't leave me.
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_00: And that's not true.
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_00: I love that false sense of control, it's that illusion that we create, and then when that's not possible, because it's not possible to like maintain that perfect or whatever you deem like these perfect conditions, it's impossible to hold it that whole time.
• 37:30
  SPEAKER_00: When that eventually collapses, when that beautiful house of cards that you think you've built, like if I just if I do all these things, it'll be perfect, and then I'll have that relationship when it all comes crashing down because it will, because it's inauthentic, it's not like then what are you gonna do?
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_00: Then what happens is you oh uh this is flowing.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_00: You get this confirmation bias of I'm not good enough, I'm too much, I'm gonna be rejacked and abandoned.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_00: But that was only the case because you built a false sense of house of cards, yes, oh my god, and not being pull authentic to you.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, and then it all came crashing down, and so what do you do again?
• 38:05
  SPEAKER_00: If I can delicately build this house of cards, this illusion, smoke and mirrors of like who I am and what I believe to be, blah blah blah, and this control, control, control, and then it collapses again because inevitably it will.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_00: Like nobody can hold that.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_00: No, it's it's impossible to hold that kind of illusion for the rest of your life.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_00: But then your brain goes, Ah, look, there's proof.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_00: There's proof we're too much, there's proof we're gonna be rejected, there's proof we're gonna be abandoned, but like it's only because you did it to yourself, and like I don't do this to shame anyone.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I've been in the same scenario 100%.
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_00: You get the person who's like avoidantly attached to like give you love and like do you love me, do you love me, do you love me?
• 38:45
  SPEAKER_00: Which pushes them away and like, all right, if I build up enough of these house of cards, it's like okay, they did this, and this, and like, and it all comes crashing down, you're like, ship, see, I was right, I was right.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_01: You like look then to be like, oh, see, I was right.
• 38:57
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, they brought home the wrong tomatoes.
• 38:58
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I was right, and then the little things, then too.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_01: It's all that's what I mean.
• 39:03
  SPEAKER_00: Like the house of cards, like all little things stack up, whether it's like how they empty the dishwasher, what they brought home, how the sex, whether you own like it's all these little things.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_00: And then how can we have juicy relationships?
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_00: How can we have a great sex life?
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_00: We just and it's like that's why I think there's we touched on like so many beautiful points in this.
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_01: So good.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_00: The nervous system is key, people are not optional.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_00: Heal your nervous system, heal your relationships, all right?
• 39:34
  SPEAKER_00: They equal each other, healing your nervous system equals healing your relationships, and it's like gonna profoundly change the life.
• 39:41
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's why, like, as much as I love healing people's physical symptoms, I also want people to understand like the ripples that it has the ripples in your relationships, especially like your predominant ones, which is like your home life.
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_00: Like that your partner tends to be like your major relationship, right?
• 39:59
  SPEAKER_00: It's the person that you choose to spend your life with, or you spend like even perhaps majority of your time with.
• 40:05
  SPEAKER_00: Like, for me, it's definitely the majority of my time with because we both work from home, so we see them all the time, we see them every day.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you want them to be juicy, but you need the safety and security to make that be so.
• 40:15
  SPEAKER_00: And like, we need to get rid of this illusion, this false sense of control, this false sense of safety in order to truly kind of like heal this.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 40:26
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_00: That's such a great episode.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_00: I love it.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, guys, so I hope you found this useful.
• 40:33
  SPEAKER_00: If you did, I would love for you guys to share it on like your Instagram, send it to a friend.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_00: If you need support with this, we're gonna leave links for anything like relevant down below.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_00: But you can always send me a DM if you're unsure kind of which container would be best for you.
• 40:47
  SPEAKER_00: We also have some new ones coming up, depending on when you're listening to this, that are gonna help your nervous system be safe in relationships.
• 40:53
  SPEAKER_00: So that's going to be fun.
• 40:55
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm just, I love having these conversations about really understanding and even just listening to this episode, you'll start to become aware of like where you're doing this.
• 41:02
  SPEAKER_00: So you might catch yourself tonight when you try to like empty the dishwasher, just let them do it.
• 41:06
  SPEAKER_00: You might catch yourself next time you're having sex, worried about you know what you're gonna look like, or worried about this.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, and if you feel like you can't get out of that loop where you can't overpower your brain, which again is just your amygdala, all right.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_00: It's literally a part of your brain that overpowers it so that your mind keeps in that loop, then definitely reach out for more support because it is hard to get out of that loop yourself.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_00: And we can get stuck in it for like years, decades, perhaps our whole life, if we don't have something that's going to break us out of that loop.
• 41:34
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, I love that.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_00: All right, guys.
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_00: We'll see you in the next episode.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, Morgan.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_00: I love chatting with you.
• 41:41
  SPEAKER_00: You're welcome.
• 41:41
  SPEAKER_02: Bye, guys.