Latest / The D.L. Hughley Show / DLHS Hour 4 | Five Ways You Lie on Your Resume
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: It is the D.L. Hughley Show, your 2026 edition. If
- 0:03Speaker 1: you're going to be in Boston, I'll be there this Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
- 0:07Speaker 1: Before that, I'm going to be at the Yellow Springs
- 0:09Speaker 1: along with Dave Chappelle. Me and Dave Chappelle are going
- 0:11Speaker 1: to hang out.
- 0:12Speaker 2: That sounds like a lot of fun.
- 0:13Speaker 3: Yes.
- 0:14Speaker 1: Go visit the Haitians down there. See what's happening. You
- 0:17Speaker 1: ain't going to visit the Haitians. Are you really?
- 0:19Speaker 3: No.
- 0:20Speaker 4: Not at all.
- 0:21Speaker 2: You almost had me.
- 0:21Speaker 1: Not at all.
- 0:22Speaker 4: You almost had me.
- 0:23Speaker 1: I'm staying away from all people that got a lot
- 0:25Speaker 1: of ice around.
- 0:26Speaker 4: I can't do it. Yeah.
- 0:28Speaker 2: They'll snatch you up.
- 0:29Speaker 1: You can go to the station.
- 0:29Speaker 4: I can go to the station.
- 0:30Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying.
- 0:31Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying.
- 0:31Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.
- 0:33Speaker 4: That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. It's in
- 0:43Speaker 4: that dressing room. Oh, my God.
- 0:45Speaker 1: Yes, and all the lawyers that would have to be there.
- 0:47Speaker 4: Yeah, no, and I'm not.
- 0:48Speaker 3: Saying it would be for public consumption now, but it's hilarious.
- 0:53Speaker 4: A showing to itself.
- 0:55Speaker 1: Officer Tatum done started something, right?
- 0:58Speaker 2: No, doesn't he always?
- 0:59Speaker 1: Why would he? Listen, listen. I believe that family should
- 1:03Speaker 1: be off limits.
- 1:04Speaker 4: Should be.
- 1:05Speaker 1: I do.
- 1:05Speaker 2: It should be.
- 1:06Speaker 1: When he said Michelle Obama looked like a man.
- 1:09Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 1:10Speaker 1: And then his wife looked like Daniel Day-Lewis. Oh. Have
- 1:14Speaker 1: you seen, look at her last moment. She looked like
- 1:17Speaker 1: Daniel Day-Lewis. Or Jim Carrey when he plays the girl. Like, ah, yes.
- 1:24Speaker 1: Officer Tatum better get there. I mean, you better join
- 1:26Speaker 1: that white woman while you got her because in two
- 1:27Speaker 1: years she's going to look like a P.E.T.
- 1:30Speaker 2: And I'm with you. Just so you know, I'm with you.
- 1:32Speaker 5: I always believe, you know, I'm funny about that.
- 1:35Speaker 2: Talking about people's looks.
- 1:36Speaker 5: They can't help how they look now. I mean, they
- 1:37Speaker 5: can help it, but they can't help it. But I
- 1:40Speaker 5: feel bad for her because she hasn't said anything.
- 1:42Speaker 2: That I know of.
- 1:43Speaker 4: No, she has.
- 1:44Speaker 2: She has? Okay, we'll get her.
- 1:45Speaker 4: Michelle hadn't either.
- 1:46Speaker 1: Yeah, Michelle did. And he actually thought it was funny
- 1:49Speaker 1: when they did the joke about her being an ape.
- 1:51Speaker 1: I'm going to just say this. It's no secret why
- 1:57Speaker 1: that bride was still available in the later rounds. Let
- 2:04Speaker 1: me tell you something. He had to get a white
- 2:07Speaker 1: woman and she had to get a black woman. Had to.
- 2:09Speaker 1: They look like that kind of couple. They do.
- 2:10Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 2:11Speaker 2: They were made for each other.
- 2:13Speaker 4: She don't have no hips.
- 2:14Speaker 1: She could use his. Yeah, she sure can. And that
- 2:17Speaker 1: s * * * is ovulating as we speak. I'm
- 2:20Speaker 1: pretty sure he's somewhere laid up with a hot water
- 2:23Speaker 1: bottle and stuff. That's for the guy. You can't.
- 2:25Speaker 4: I can't.
- 2:26Speaker 2: Sometimes you say stuff.
- 2:27Speaker 1: I just, I don't know. That shaped like a top.
- 2:31Speaker 1: Remember when the top used to spin? He looked like
- 2:35Speaker 1: a tornado.
- 2:38Speaker 4: You know he got hips when John Legend said, damn,
- 2:41Speaker 4: he got some hips.
- 2:41Speaker 1: You know. He looked like my Nana. He does.
- 2:47Speaker 4: He looked like Nana. He looked like my third grade teacher, Mrs.
- 2:51Speaker 1: Tinch.
- 2:53Speaker 3: Mrs. Tinch.
- 2:56Speaker 1: You look like every cafeteria lady I've ever seen. Every
- 3:00Speaker 1: time he stalks, I can hear a grain bane. I
- 3:02Speaker 1: ain't no more grain bane. If he had a tail,
- 3:04Speaker 1: he could be Jabba the Hutt. Man, let me tell
- 3:06Speaker 1: you something. I just, man, listen, if you're going to
- 3:09Speaker 1: get a white woman, get one that other white, that
- 3:11Speaker 1: people can wear them.
- 3:12Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 3:13Speaker 2: Ooh, I can see it.
- 3:14Speaker 1: Don't get the white woman to look like a learner's manager.
- 3:16Speaker 1: Stop it. Hey, excuse me, are you here to open
- 3:21Speaker 1: the mall?
- 3:23Speaker 2: What time y'all close? You know what? Let me stop.
- 3:26Speaker 1: If you're having a hard time landing that new job,
- 3:29Speaker 1: maybe you should try telling the truth. Jazz, just give
- 3:31Speaker 1: us five ways that you're lying on your resume by
- 3:36Speaker 1: Meg Butler from Madame Noir.
- 3:38Speaker 5: Number five, an inflated salary or salaries.
- 3:42Speaker 4: Yeah, your last job. Hey, Rihanna.
- 3:45Speaker 1: I'm making $ 858, 000.
- 3:47Speaker 5: Number four of the top five ways they can tell
- 3:49Speaker 5: you're lying on your resume.
- 3:50Speaker 2: Don't contact my former employers.
- 3:52Speaker 1: No, ever, ever, ever.
- 3:54Speaker 2: Don't do that.
- 3:55Speaker 1: I just think they got their phone disconnected.
- 3:57Speaker 5: And all those businesses, they, you know, they don't have phones.
- 4:01Speaker 1: That's what happens.
- 4:02Speaker 2: Number three of the top.
- 4:03Speaker 5: Five ways they can tell you're lying on your resume.
- 4:05Speaker 5: Executive job titles for an entry-level position. Yeah, yeah.
- 4:10Speaker 2: I'm the front desk manager.
- 4:11Speaker 1: Yeah. Of what? Huh? Of what?
- 4:16Speaker 2: I manage these phones.
- 4:17Speaker 1: Yes, yes. When they ring, I answer them. I am
- 4:20Speaker 1: the official mint putter on the pillar.
- 4:23Speaker 4: I'm a sanitation engineer.
- 4:25Speaker 5: Yeah, there you go.
- 4:27Speaker 4: Official cabbage man.
- 4:28Speaker 2: Number two of the top five ways they can tell
- 4:30Speaker 2: you're lying on your resume.
- 4:31Speaker 1: Leaving out dates. Yeah.
- 4:33Speaker 2: From here to then.
- 4:34Speaker 1: Yeah, I was.
- 4:35Speaker 5: What?
- 4:35Speaker 1: I did a brief 15 year.
- 4:38Speaker 2: From there to the other.
- 4:39Speaker 1: When was that?
- 4:40Speaker 2: About there.
- 4:42Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 4:42Speaker 1: I took a gap year. There was 17 years.
- 4:44Speaker 2: Yes, I did.
- 4:46Speaker 1: I did. I was guessed up the state.
- 4:49Speaker 5: And the number one of the top five ways they
- 4:50Speaker 5: can tell that you're lying on your resume. The jobs
- 4:53Speaker 5: are out of business.
- 4:54Speaker 1: Right.
- 4:54Speaker 2: That's what that girl said. Remember what she said at
- 4:56Speaker 2: the school?
- 4:57Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 4:58Speaker 2: Don't say remember.
- 4:59Speaker 1: Of course I did. I was a manager. Of course
- 5:03Speaker 1: she is. I mean, if you can lie on your resume,
- 5:07Speaker 1: you know. You don't need a doctor when you look
- 5:10Speaker 1: like that.
- 5:10Speaker 2: Is that what you're saying?
- 5:11Speaker 1: No, no. It is the deal. He will show you
- 5:14Speaker 1: a 2026 edition. So if you're going to be in
- 5:18Speaker 1: Yellow Springs, Ohio, I'll be there tomorrow night along with
- 5:20Speaker 1: Dave Chappelle and Earthquake. Then the following day, I'll be
- 5:22Speaker 1: at the City Winery in Boston, Massachusetts. Two Friday, two Saturday,
- 5:27Speaker 1: and one Sunday. And our podcast, Uncertain, a new episode
- 5:30Speaker 1: every Thursday and Monday. It airs at 11. Very nice.
- 5:33Speaker 1: Why does Lena look so confused right now?
- 5:35Speaker 2: She always looks confused.
- 5:36Speaker 1: Don't furrow your brow like that, sweetheart. Don't furrow your brow.
- 5:40Speaker 2: No, but you do always look so good.
- 5:43Speaker 1: If you're going, baby.
- 5:44Speaker 2: She's trying to figure things out. She's trying to figure
- 5:46Speaker 2: things out. I was right here. The world is out
- 5:48Speaker 2: of order and Lena is on the case.
- 5:50Speaker 4: That's right.
- 5:51Speaker 1: Lena's either late to where we are or she's never
- 5:55Speaker 1: at the same place we are at the same time.
- 5:56Speaker 2: That's because it's not like I'm sitting here twirling my thumbs.
- 6:00Speaker 1: I'm working.
- 6:00Speaker 4: You're multitasking.
- 6:02Speaker 2: Yeah, she's multitasking.
- 6:03Speaker 1: She's the Dominican Dolly Parton. Oh, double D. You never
- 6:12Speaker 1: catch her doing the backstroke. That'll never happen.
- 6:17Speaker 2: Blaine can't do the backstroke.
- 6:19Speaker 4: That's all she can do, probably.
- 6:21Speaker 1: Can you do the backstroke? Can you do the backstroke?
- 6:23Speaker 1: I gotta go get your martini.
- 6:27Speaker 2: She ain't got time to be fooling with you.
- 6:28Speaker 1: She's her own floatation device.
- 6:31Speaker 4: I got two of them.
- 6:32Speaker 1: Let me get up on one of them. She's a boy.
- 6:39Speaker 1: A buoy, not a buoy. Here she came back in.
- 6:43Speaker 2: Floating in at number nine.
- 6:46Speaker 4: He thought I was joking.
- 6:47Speaker 1: I was over here handling your martini. How did you
- 6:50Speaker 1: get them so fast?
- 6:50Speaker 2: Don't worry about it.
- 6:51Speaker 1: Oh, okay.
- 6:52Speaker 2: You worry about that backstroke.
- 6:54Speaker 1: Thank you. Thank you. Um, so Jasmine, what's going on today?
- 6:59Speaker 5: So I don't know if you guys kept up with
- 7:01Speaker 5: the World Humanoid Robot Games in Beijing.
- 7:04Speaker 1: No.
- 7:05Speaker 5: Well, apparently they have a robot named Lightning who ran
- 7:09Speaker 5: the 100 meter sprint 9.326.
- 7:12Speaker 2: They don't need no more.
- 7:14Speaker 1: That's for sure.
- 7:15Speaker 2: You know whose record he beat? Usain Bolt.
- 7:18Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 7:18Speaker 2: His name is Tiangong Ultra.
- 7:21Speaker 4: But he don't hit them corners well. I saw him
- 7:24Speaker 4: when he was wiping out.
- 7:25Speaker 5: If nothing else, it is funny and scary at the
- 7:28Speaker 5: same time because it's funny to see some of these robots.
- 7:31Speaker 2: They don't do so well.
- 7:33Speaker 5: And they tumble and fall and they try to throw
- 7:35Speaker 5: and catch and jump.
- 7:36Speaker 2: It don't work.
- 7:36Speaker 1: But yeah. They doing anything to get rid of black people.
- 7:42Speaker 2: I'm trying to tell you, they trying to do it.
- 7:44Speaker 1: Mm hmm. All right, Skip, my man Cheatham, what did
- 7:47Speaker 1: you learn today?
- 7:48Speaker 3: You had me look up Jim Carrey's character, the one that, yeah,
- 7:51Speaker 3: Vera DeMilo. That's the character that looks like Officer Tatum's wife,
- 7:56Speaker 3: Vera DeMilo.
- 7:57Speaker 4: Vera Cosa, the mistress of destruction.
- 7:59Speaker 1: Why? All right, coming up on the next deal.
- 8:06Speaker 4: Random dinner's ready.
- 8:09Speaker 1: Coming up on the next deal on the show. Kyle,
- 8:10Speaker 1: you've been a.k.a. Special K as the latest high record producer.
- 8:16Speaker 1: And what we hear is the latest project of short
- 8:17Speaker 1: bus records plus the military man Jamal Kingsley returns to
- 8:19Speaker 1: expose racism hidden in our everyday lives. It is the deal.
- 8:22Speaker 1: We will definitely see you on the other side. Kyle,
- 8:24Speaker 1: my favorite short bus operator. Pull that straight. We got
- 8:27Speaker 1: to go. It's the deal. See you on the other side.