Latest / Becoming / Jaxon Cummings: Why God Sometimes Lets Us Go Through Failure

Transcript

Jaxon Cummings: Why God Sometimes Lets Us Go Through Failure · Becoming

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: When I look at life, I see it as good.
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: I just feel like the joy and happiness that comes
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: from that perspective brings more light and goodness in my life.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Going through the divorce was one of those pieces where,
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: of course, it was a hell. I would have never
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: wished to go through that, especially as a dad of eight.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Going through that process was definitely a miserable experience, but
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: I tried my best to turn to God and to
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: lean on Him through the process. When I did that,
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: I was able to see things differently. I've been able
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: to find joy and more understanding going through the process
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: than I ever imagined. It brought me more peace.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: Welcome back to the Life Legacy Podcast. Today is a
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: complete honor. I am bringing to the table someone that
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: multiple people have told me that I have to have
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: on and have to get to know better because this
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: is one of those unreal well-rounded leaders who keeps family
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: first and beyond successful in your business ventures, investing. And
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: so today I get the honor of bringing on Bubba
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: Page to the podcast.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: Oh, thank you.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: Those are way too kind of words for my real story.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: We'll go in there. This is good.
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm excited.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: I know we're a little short on time. And so
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: I just want to dive into it.
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah, let's go.
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: So first off, what have been some of the most
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: pivotal moments of your journey? I normally like, you know,
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: we'll slowly dive in, but let's jump to it. Yeah.
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Let me give you some history. So I'm born here
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: in Utah, but I didn't grow up here. So I
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: was raised in Northern California, San Francisco Bay Area. First
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: grade to junior year, dad took a job in Arizona.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: So I ended up finishing my high school just my
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: senior year in Mesa, Arizona. I talk about this because
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: a lot of people struggle to think, oh my gosh,
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: your senior year, that's horrible. It was an amazing experience.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: So I had best friends in California. I ended up
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: making best friends in Arizona. I think it was easier
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: as a guy. Maybe it would have been harder as
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: a teenage girl. But that help moving helped me to
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: Learn how to make friends, learn how to get outside
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: my shell maybe and continue to be more outgoing, which
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: does come more naturally for me than maybe some.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: I think you have one of the warmer welcoming I've seen.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: Like you have that in you. I think you just
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: brought up like the principle of perspective. Yeah. And I
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: think with everything that's going on in the world right now,
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: perspective is a huge point of choosing to find the
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: good in horrendous situations and then making the most of them.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: How has perspective played a role in your journey?
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure. I do believe that there is a blessing,
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: a gift from God that allowed me to see life
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: more in a half full perspective. And I know some
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: people struggle with that, where half empty is their MO.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: When I look at life, I see it as good.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: I give people the benefit of the doubt. I see
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: people as just whole, as good people. Have I been
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: taken advantage sometimes because of that in business or relationships?
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, for sure. But for me, I would rather
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: have that happen than just be pessimistic all the time.
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: And when I'm seeking, you know, not recently divorced, and
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: as I seek my next partner, I also want to
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: find somebody who sees life as half full. I just
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: feel like the joy and happiness that comes from that
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: perspective brings more light and goodness in my life. And
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: so going through the divorce was one of those pieces where,
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: of course, it was a hell. I would have never
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: wished to go through that, especially as a dad of eight.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: Eight children, five to 15.
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: Four boys, four girls. That's part of the story, right?
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: It's a big part of the story. Huge part.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: And I love fatherhood. And so going through that process
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: was definitely a miserable experience, and I wouldn't wish it
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: upon my worst enemy. But I tried my best to
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: turn to God and to lean on Him through the process.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: And when I did that, I was able to see
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: things differently. And the question I had to ask was,
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: what does God want to teach me through this? This
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: is not something I wanted. It's not something that anybody wanted.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: I mean, no one wants to go through a divorce.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: You don't get married to get divorced. But what do
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: I need to learn? And so when I would ask
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: that question sincerely on my knees pleading with God like
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: I was going through the worst, I felt like he
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: answered that prayer. And part of it for me specifically
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: was to learn more charity. And to me, charity is
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: the true love of Christ. And so if I sought
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: out charity for those around me, especially if someone has
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: impacted you in a negative way, that was the gift
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: he was trying to give me. And I didn't have
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: that fully at that time. Nor do I have it
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: fully now, but I'm working on it to become more
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: charitable in nature and having more love and less judgment
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: and more openness. And the gift of perspective that you
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: brought up has been able to see people in a
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: unique and different way now. And, you know, we got
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: stuck a little before this where every person has something
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: going on in their life. And if it's not happening
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: right now, it already happened or it's about to happen.
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: We cannot escape as human beings. We cannot escape.
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: It's part of the plan.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: Trials and challenges in our lives. And my goal, while I,
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: you know, put content out there online, is to bring light.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: I hope I can bring light in this dark world.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: and help others see that you can have a positive perspective,
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: even when you're going through the misery of some of
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: the pieces that you have to go through in life.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: So when somebody loses someone, that's a horrific experience. But
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: can you find light and joy in the memories of
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: that person or in new experiences? And if you have
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: to go through a divorce or if you have to
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: go through physical ailments, What can you do to see
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: light and bring joy in your life? So I just
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: asked the question, what am I supposed to learn through
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: this experience? And God, what do you want me to
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: do with this? Because I couldn't do it alone. So
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: I had to put this on the altar per se
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: and say, I know I can't do it by me alone.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: And so I feel horrible for people who have to
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: go through these trials and they don't have that belief
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: in Jesus because they're truly in their mind. They're truly alone.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: Jesus is still there for them. His arm is outstretched
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: waiting for them to grab it. But they feel more alone.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: And I have felt buoyed up. I felt lifted. And
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: I've been able to find even joy and more understanding
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: going through the process than I ever imagined. And it's
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: brought me more peace than I would have maybe expected.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: Isn't that the craziest thing when you have a moment
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: of peace in utter hell that you're going through. I
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: think it's one of the most hand-reaching, proactive, active spiritual
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: experiences that we get to have is when we're going
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: through the harder moments of life. I just had a
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: moment come to mind, and I haven't shared this on here,
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: but there was a day that I was going to
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: the gym there was a car pulled over and I
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: saw this guy on the phone running back and I
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: see a person on the ground and I, I pull over.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: I'm like, something's going on here. And I hear him say, Hey,
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: I just hit someone with my car and you guys
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: got to come here right now. I get over to
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: that person. It's him, me and this, and this person
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: on the ground and I'm checking pulse.
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: There's blood.
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: And it, I had someone pass away in my arms.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: And that day, God turned it into one of the
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: most spiritual experiences where I call it my spiritual day
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: that I've had. But I'm in this traumatic, tragic experience
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: where I think a lot of people can relate to that,
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: that we're at UVU where they saw something that was
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: so horrific. And through God's compensation, He let me have
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: a very spiritual experience. And I, I don't know if that's,
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: you know, the case with, you know, majority of people
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: that have experienced that. And I let God just kind
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: of take, take the wheel of that day. And I,
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: I saw like 10 miracles that I wrote down that
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: I needed to be there.
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: And that's fascinating.
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: So, uh, I don't share that coincidence. It was not
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: a coincidence. I don't believe in coincidences. Like everything has
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: divine timing. God knows the end from the beginning. He
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: knows what we need. And so there was absolutely, in
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: my opinion, no coincidence that you pulled in at that
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: exact moment. And now to have experienced that is horrific.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: But looking at it from a perspective of, okay, how
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: do I heal from this experience? What do I learn
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: from this experience? And for all those who were at UVU,
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: I mean, this is a topic that's very near and
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: dear to our hearts. It's literally across just five minutes
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: away from here. Um, you have thousands of people who
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: had experienced that horrific, you know, piece. And now this
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: week within Michigan and people getting, you know, churches burned
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: and shot at, This is a unique time to be alive.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: And I think when, I know for me, I've thought
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: about this process that there is, there is a revival
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: of Christianity, let's call it, that is happening.
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: A hundred percent.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: And there is a division among people, I think as well.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: this has all been prophesied. I mean, the scriptures talk
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: about what's happening in these latter days. These are the
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: last days and we're living proof of that. And so
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: it's only that much more motivation for me to be prepared,
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: both from a spiritual side and a temporal side. And,
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: you know, I look, especially if they're, you know, if
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: I were to think of my 20 year old self,
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: I'm 42, eight kids, you know, raise these children. I'm
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: still raising these children, having a blast doing it, although
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: it's utter chaos all the time. If I were to
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: think back at my 20-year-old self and what would I
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: want to teach or tell him? Look, I loved serving.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: I served a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: of Latter-day Saints, the Mormon church. I was in Brazil
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: and I absolutely loved my time there. Southern Brazil, Porto Alegre.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: And the people that I got to love and serve,
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: it was beautiful. The feeling of coming closer to God
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: because I was talking about Jesus every day was incredible.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: But as I got back, I stayed active and would
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: go to church and be a member in the congregation.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: But I did not take on the role and responsibility
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: that I could have. And it wasn't until.
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: What do you think.
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, go for it. What do you think could have is?
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: What is that role that you wish you would have
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: took on? Yeah.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: I think that I was going through more motions rather
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: than true discipleship. And so if I think back to
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: my 20-year-old self, and if I were to give advice,
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: I would think back at the little answers that we
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: get when we're growing up as children in the primary.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: the way to come to know God is to come
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: to know his word. So you study his scriptures. And
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: whether that's the Bible for you, you study his word
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: to come to know him. And that was very casual
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: for me during that next decade. And that was one.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: The prayer became more repetitive sometimes. It just became a
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: thing that you did because that's what you're used to.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: But true depth, sincerity, you know, speaking to my maker,
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: that was one piece I needed more of. I didn't
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: realize it. I didn't recognize it. Worshiping outside of, you know,
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: in church, but then also in a temple or a
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: synagogue or whatever you call it as a holy place.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: I feel like as often as possible, we need to
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: be dedicating time to come to know God more. If
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: we can know his character, then we know what we
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: need to emulate. If I think about repentance, I was
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: a little bit afraid of it. Just it was scary.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: Like repentance was a scary thing. I was a good
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: kid growing up, and so there wasn't too much to
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: have to worry about. But it was scary to think
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: about going and talking to somebody or even just acknowledging
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: in front of God that I had things I needed
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: to work on. But repentance is one of the most
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: beautiful processes that we can do, and it's so joyful
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: to take the weight that is on your shoulders right now.
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: So 20 year old self, if you're watching this, you know,
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: these core pieces and repentance is one of them is
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: absolutely necessary to be spiritually available for God to talk
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: to you. And that brings me to revelation and inspiration.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: I just think so key that God is trying to
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: talk to us all the time, 24 seven, the windows
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: of heaven, he's open and he's pouring information down to us.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Are we listening? And I think there was quite a
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: big timeframe where I was distracted. Look, I'm an entrepreneur.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: I'm now an entrepreneur turned investor. I love entrepreneurship, but
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: I over-dedicated my time and energy to business, in my opinion.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: And I could have been better at turning more to
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: God and to my family and that process. Now, I
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: know there's a time to grind, as people call it.
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: And if, you know, if there are seasons, there's seasons.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: But to me, it's not worth giving up that time
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: to connect with God every single day. No success is
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: going to compensate for any type of failure when especially
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: in a home. And so as a parent, as a father,
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: as a husband, that element should be number one. That
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: relationship with God and with Jesus should be number one.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: And then comes your spouse and then goes your children,
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: in my opinion, and then comes work and physical.
• 15:17
  Speaker 3: Health, all this stuff.
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: So there's just these core competencies. So if I'm talking
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: to this younger self, I'm telling this person, even though
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: they're going to hear it and they're probably listening now
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: and they're saying, give me a break. I've heard this
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: my entire life. Like, yeah, read your scriptures, go pray,
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: go to the temple. Like this is, I've been told
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: this my whole life.
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: No, you don't understand.
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: Like it's that simple. Through the small and simple things,
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: great things come to pass. And God makes it this simple.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: If you do these simple things, you will have miracles
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: that come into your life that you've never even imagined.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: You'll go down the direction that you're supposed to. Now,
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: even if that direction doesn't work, like one of my businesses,
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: I felt absolutely inspired to start it. It failed three
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: years later. And I remember talking to God and being like,
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: what the heck? I felt inspired to build this business.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: And I didn't know the answer until a couple of
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: years later when I went through my own spiritual awakening.
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: And I couldn't have had it if I wasn't humbled
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: by that business not working out. So now I look
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: back and say, oh my gosh, you know, God sees
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: it all. He knows what's best for us. And that
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: failure in business was devastating to me. It was the
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: first time I felt depression, even anxiety. I hadn't even
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: felt that before. My reputation, I was this award-winning entrepreneur
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: with other businesses. And then with this one, it didn't
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: pan out. I thought my career was over. But it
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: was this awakening process that I needed to go through
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: to be, unfortunately, compelled to be humbled so that I
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: could see his hand in my life and where I
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: really needed to go. So I'm on a tangent.
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: I'm just imagining.
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: There's an image where Jesus is taking away a mini
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: teddy bear and he's got a giant teddy bear behind him.
• 17:16
  Speaker 3: And I think that's reality of.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: A lot of our failures that are a little bit
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: out of our hands and there's better to come. And
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: also the topic of failure itself, I love so much
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: because failure is like one of the key stepping stones
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: to success. And you're not going to learn more from
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: a success than a failure. Failure, you know, it shocks
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: your world, shocks who you are, everything. And it does
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: a reset for what really matters.
• 17:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no question.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: That failure was one of the best things that could
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: have happened to me. I would have never said that
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: during the moment, but it really set a different trajectory
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: of my life. And I am forever grateful for that
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: because it, even though I was, um, a Christian believer,
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: I wasn't fully all in. And I can say now
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: I am all in. And I wish I knew that.
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: I wish I had that same conviction as a 20
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: something year old because of how much time I could
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: have been all in and how much goodness that could
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: have brought the world.
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: So let's talk about that for a sec. Yeah.
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: Why? So, you know, there's a lot of people that
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: go through the motions and also like wrapping this all
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: a little bit together. I think circumstances, hardships, everything happens.
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: And that's part of the plan. We're supposed to go
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: through it. And with our part is how do we react?
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: What are the questions that we're asking? Like why me
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: or what can I learn from this? You know, those
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: little paradigm shifts that it sounds like you've experienced a
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: lot of those.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: Oh, for sure.
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: I think the reaction is so important.
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: But to going through the motions, to being proactive, to
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: being all in, why do you feel like someone should
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: go all in versus going through the motions? Yeah.
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: Look, I think you need to live authentically to yourself, right?
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: I'm a big believer. If you are more authentic to
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: you and who you are and you discover who you
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: are truly as a son or a daughter of God,
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: you'll have more joy in your life. If you're pretending
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: for other people, that probably came from some kind of
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: childhood wound because that's people pleasing. So if you're just
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: trying to people please by doing what other people think
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: you should, you won't find as much true joy. So
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: by being authentic to yourself, I know a lot of
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: people say, well, then if I'm being authentic, I'm out, right?
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: Like I'm not going to be an active member of
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: any church. I'm going to have nature church or I'm
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: going to do whatever it is that they connect, which
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: is to each his own. Like I believe that there's paths, right?
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: that everybody has to take to find Jesus. But you've
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: got to find God at some point, in my opinion.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: And whether that's your church or nature or the many
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: other varieties, that's up to the own person's path and decisions.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: I find the most peace and joy inside of a religion.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: And I find that that gives me more freedom than
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: anything that is enclosed. I know a lot of people
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: feel restricted when there's commandments you have to follow and
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: there's rules and there's, but the reality is I have,
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: I have built more freedom and more peace and joy
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: because of the principles of the gospel of Jesus Christ
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: than I could have ever found anywhere else. When I
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: find it, when I watch and see some of my
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: friends or family that go down a path that takes
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: them away from Jesus in essence, I find that in
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: the short term, There's fun and there's happiness because you're
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: doing things that are new and exciting in life. But
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: over time, that true joy and peace hasn't been found yet.
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: And I see that if they're willing to be honest
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: with themselves and maybe let go of some of the pride,
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: that we all have pride, but in recognize that they
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: haven't found that true joy and happiness, that, that, uh,
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: that peace hasn't been found exactly where they thought it
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: could be, um, that they're going to in turn find
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: Jesus in that process. And they're going to find God
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: and his plan of salvation, um, is real. I'm just,
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: I'm just a believer that we are here to receive
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: a body to be tested. And we go through this
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: mortal journey, uh, to learn as much as we possibly
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: can and to help as many people as we can
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: and to learn to love God and love others like
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: unto ourselves. So if you don't find a way to
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: love yourself and you're not being authentic to yourself, it's
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: really hard to love others. And it's sad to me
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: when people are on so unhappy with themselves and they
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: haven't been able to find the true love within themselves
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: that they take it out on other people. And you know, like,
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: This man in Michigan who chose to shoot and kill
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: people within a church congregation. The type of hell he
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: must have been living because he wasn't loving himself. And
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: if you're not loving yourself and you're not loving God,
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: you're sure not going to love other people. And I
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: would just challenge those around who maybe are listening. If
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: you haven't found love for yourself, turn to God and
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: ask how. How do I learn to love myself? let
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: him teach you how to love yourself because you can
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: then love all these other people around you.
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: But, um, I don't know.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: I just believe people pleasing is a, um, to me, it's,
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: it's a process of childhood wounding, something you learned within
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: your childhood. And if you haven't healed it properly, um,
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: you're going to have less ability to set boundaries with others. Um,
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: you're going to have less love for yourself and, uh,
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: you probably will, not be as authentic to yourself.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: It sounds like you've gone through that journey of finding
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: how to re-love yourself through the ups and downs of life.
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: What were some actionable steps that you took? And so
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: I'm just picturing someone at home that's like, yeah, I'm not,
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: you know, my love for myself scale one to 10.
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: I think that's a good starter question. And then what
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: is the next question? You said to do talk to
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: God and ask, how can I love myself more?
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: But take me through the steps that you went through.
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're going to hate this answer.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: It's good.
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: I'm going to go back to those five pieces.
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: Because look, if you're struggling to love yourself, there's probably
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: some reasons there. Now, I'm a pro believer in therapy.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: I think that's a healthy thing for people to do,
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: especially if a therapist has expertise in attachment styles. As
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: well as internal family system, which is like speaking to
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: the inner child. I just believe if you're looking for
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: a therapist, try and find one with those two bits
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: of expertise. Because they can dig really deep. And it's
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: not just talk therapy. It's deep wound healing that you
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: can root out some of the things that's been a
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: part of your life forever. That even subconsciously, you may
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: not know why you react to certain things, why you're
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: triggered by X, Y, or Z. And it's because there's
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: wounds that need to be healed. And so I just
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: feel deeply that if, uh, you know, therapy can be
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: really positive on the healing aspect, but when you come
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: to know Christ, and this is like a broken record,
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: you come to know him, you feel that love from him.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: You feel gratitude for what he's given you. These little
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: pieces start to change your mindset. So if somebody is, um,
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: struggled with loving themselves. They have a negative mindset. They're
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: pessimistic in.
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: Their own mind.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: To me, that's not coming from God. So if those
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: thoughts are just incessant in your mind, just know who
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: that's coming from. And you need God in your life
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: to overcome those negative thoughts. It can be reversed. Those
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: things can be turned into positive thoughts. And you can
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: live up to your true potential that you were meant
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: to have. I believe we were given a mission before
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: we even came to this earth. That we even signed
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: a contract saying, I will go and do when I
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: get down there. And we've just forgotten. And so this
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: prayerful thought process of doing these things, those pieces help
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: you to find out who you truly are and why
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: you're truly here. And if you can know that mission
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: and you go act upon that mission, no matter how
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: scary it is, God will lead and guide your life
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: and he will help you to have that success. Success
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: to me doesn't have to mean, you know, Ferraris and
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: big houses and vacations. Success is when you're fulfilling your
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: mission that you were sent here on this earth to do.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: And a big part of it for me is being
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: a father. Like I know that that was a big
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: part of my mission. I also feel inspired and compelled
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: to share my story. I feel like that's part of
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: my mission to bring people to Jesus. That's part of
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: my mission. I feel like he's gifted me with talents
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: and gifts within entrepreneurship and within investing. And so I'm
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: helping others to do that. But it's because, and it
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: wasn't until later in life that I found this mission,
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: that I found this passion. And it makes me feel
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: more whole. It helps me to feel like I'm doing
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: what God wanted me to do. And to be willing
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: to speak up about God and Jesus and on these
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: types of podcasts and on social media that can be intimidating.
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: Cause I get hate just like anybody. Um, when you
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: bring up sensitive topics like this, but I must, I
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: must do it because if I don't, I'll be held
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: accountable to that contract that I signed of, this is
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: what I will do when I come to this earth.
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: And if I don't do it, I am now held
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: accountable for that. And I know Jesus will make up
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: a lot. He'll make up my life. inefficiencies, my sins.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: He'll make up so much of what I'm not capable
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: of doing, but I believe there's so much more that
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: I have to do to become the person He wants
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: me to be. And I just wish and pray and
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: hope that anyone hearing this gets inspired to sit down
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: and say, okay, tonight is the night I'm going to
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: pray sincerely to God. I may fast and go without
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: food and water for 24 hours, to be able to
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: show God that I'm willing to sacrifice and I want help.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: What is it the mission that I signed up for?
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: And if you take that time, and it may take
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: more than once, more likely it will, it takes that
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: effort and sincerity and that pleading and wrestling with God
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: to come to know what that true mission is. My
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: 20-year-old self, man, I wish I had that. I wish
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: I had that guidance in that direction. I feel like
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: by accident, I was kind of bouncing around that guidance
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: that he was trying to give me, but I could
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: have done so much more faster if I would have listened.
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: And if I would have gotten rid of things that
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: I shouldn't have been doing, stop listening to certain music,
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: stop watching things I shouldn't have been watching, treating people
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: in an incredible way with empathy and compassion, like all
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: of these pieces, repentance more frequently all the time. All
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: of these are bits and pieces that would have allowed
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: me to accomplish even more. And so now I look
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: backwards and I don't have regret. I look backwards and
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: I say, okay, well, I learned from there. Now I'm
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: moving forward on a path that I feel like God
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: is wanting me to be on.
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: Well, it's cool to sit across from you right now.
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: I have had so many interviews with so many people
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: and I can tell when someone is talking from their
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: mouth or from their soul. And it's like your, your
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: soul has been, you know, unleashed on the podcast today
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: so far. And so one, I congratulate you on getting
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: to that point where you can let your, your soul talk.
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: And two, I just also want to say I have
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: lived a life where I've experienced the side effects Where
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: I'm doing all those things and I've experienced the side
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: where God was not a.
• 30:04
  Speaker 3: Part of my life.
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: And I've gone through ups and downs in both of
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: those moments. And I just know to the core of
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: my soul, my life is so much better when I'm
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: doing what you were talking about. You know, those five
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: simple things that are simple, but they're really hard for
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: the natural man to continually stay disciplined doing. Exactly.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: And we all go upstairs and back again, go up
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: and then we come back. That is totally part of life.
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: Sometimes you are in a more spiritual state of mind and,
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: and so, but it is keeping track of saying, okay,
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: like those habits, those consistent habits that hopefully don't become
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: just a repent, excuse me, a repetitive nature that these
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: habits become something that are defining in your life. And
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: when I think about a legacy of, What do I
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: want to be known for? I want to be known
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: for my love of God and of Jesus Christ. I
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: want to be known for my discipleship, that my children
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: will look back and say, my dad loved God and
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: he served him and he represented him and he spoke
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: of him. And it was such a big part of
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: my life that it was not separated between church and state. No,
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: that my business had God all over it. That my
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: demeanor was, That my example could have that. Now, I
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: have not arrived when it comes to this. This isn't
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: a lifelong journey for me. But the legacy I want
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: to leave is one of finding that peace and joy
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: because of Him. Finding that ability to listen and heed
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: His Word because I've been repenting and cleansed myself. The
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: understanding of Him so that when I can help teach
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: and preach... and be the man I know I'm supposed
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: to be. The legacy I want to live is as
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: a father who loved and who spent time, and I
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: didn't let business get in the way of these beautiful children.
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: I want the legacy that I can leave, that I
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: was not afraid to share, that I had courage. I
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: tell my kids, we pray about this all the time.
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: We are warriors for Jesus. We are his warriors. And
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: I know we're at battle right now. It is a
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: spiritual battle. And I think people are starting to wake
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: up to the spiritual battle. Satan's done an amazing job
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: of hiding and doing his work in darkness. And it's
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: starting to come to light. People are starting to see
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: the reality of the adversary in our every single day life.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: He does not sleep. He does not waste time. He
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: and his minions are doing everything in his power to
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: work on each one of us. with as much power
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: as they can to get us off of the path.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: And it's as simple as distraction. He knows that you
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: and I are probably not going to do some massacre thing.
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: Unless he slowly gets us down this path. But he
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: probably knows he can distract us. And that distraction is
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: too many, too many scrolls, you know, um, not heeding
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: the word or, or feeling an inspired thought and not
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: acting on it because I'm distracted by something else. Like
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: to me, so many good people are out there and
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: we're just a little bit distracted. And, uh, you know,
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: these incredible devices that we hold are just an unbelievable
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: help and support for us to reach such a true potential.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: But opposition is in all things. So we have this
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: incredible device that can do almost anything for us. And
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: it can also tear you to pieces.
• 33:53
  Speaker 3: It can be one of the most damaging things. Absolutely.
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: So I'm not going to shun cell phones, but we
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: have to be in power, in our power, and set
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: boundaries with ourselves so that we're more in control. So
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: we can use it for good and avoid the evil
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: that comes with it. And if you found yourself listening
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: to this, if you found yourself stuck, you know, in
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: the muck, in the mud, and you're doing things you
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: know you shouldn't, it is never too late to stop
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: right now, get on your knees and plead with God
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: to ask for forgiveness. If you're stuck with pornography or
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: with greed or with jealousness or bitterness because of what
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: you've been through in life, It is now that is
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: the time. And so I challenge you. This is a
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: question that you can ask every day. The scriptures use
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: the term, what lack I yet? You might ask the word,
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: what do I need to repent of today? And if
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: you don't know, God will tell you. And if you're
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: willing to listen, he will prompt you in that exact moment.
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: You may have just thought of it by listening to
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: me saying that on this podcast, that you You even
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: thought the question, what do I need to repent of?
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: And a thought hit you. Write it down and act
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: upon it.
• 35:12
  Speaker 3: Love that.
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: You may have to make that phone call. You have
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: to maybe go apologize. You maybe have to go forgive.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: But this is something that we can all do better
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: every single day to make progress. Well, a quick thought
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: I have.
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: You know that feeling when you When you go on
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: a date, you leave and you're like screaming in your car.
• 35:35
  Speaker 3: It was a killer date.
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: I've had similar and better feelings leaving a bishop's office
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: after experiencing raw repentance. And so I just know what
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: you're saying is true. And there's so many things I
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: want to dive into and we're going to have to
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: do a part two.
• 35:56
  Speaker 3: But the.
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: Like, well, I want to dive into the kids and
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: entrepreneurship and being able to manage all that in some
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: shape or fatherhood.
• 36:05
  Speaker 3: Yep.
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: But the point of this podcast is, I think, a
• 36:11
  Speaker 2: little bit more intentionality with your spiritual journey. And how
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: can you have a better perspective? How can you react
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: to these circumstances that we're all in, in a positive,
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: proactive way? And so I know there were gems in
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: here that people will have some great takeaways. And I
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: think that was the feel of the podcast today. And so, man,
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: you're doing amazing stuff.
• 36:37
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: And I appreciate who you are and what you were
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: able to share today. So thanks for coming on.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: I appreciate you. If people were to find me, they're
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: going to find me on Instagram, above a page. LinkedIn,
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: I'm there all the time too, above a page. But
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: if you're interested, fatherhoodmovement.com. It's just about to be launched.
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: You can go to the website now, sign up for
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: the prelaunch. These types of concepts are what I'm going
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: to be sharing. And then in depth with fatherhood and
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: a book coming that's father operating system, just the structure
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: behind fatherhood, how we can do better as fathers and spouses.
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: I'm passionate about it. Obviously the entrepreneurship side is, has
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: been my whole career. And so I do run businessbookingup.com. So.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: The business bootcamp.com is.
• 37:25
  Speaker 3: Where the business boot. Okay.
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: Well, there you go, man.
• 37:30
  Speaker 3: No, an honor to have you.