Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / What leads to the downfall of a Narcissist?

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What leads to the downfall of a Narcissist? · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on beautiful people.
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  What was another episode of the narcissist code?
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  I'm your favorite selfaware narcissist Mr. Lee Hammett
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  better known as mental illness across all social media
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  platforms. This is the first time seeing my
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  face or hearing my lovely voice. I may clinically diagnosed
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  narcissist and it is my platform on social media to raise
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  awareness for NPD, get more people into therapy and also
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  validate the victims, survivors and thrivers.
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  Thrivers of said disorder said Toxic people said toxic traits.
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  Today's episode y'all is going to be about what leads to the
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  downfall of a narcissist. What leads to the downfall of a
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  toxic narcissistic person. Before you hop in today's
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  episode, y'all you know I got to shout out my self love journal.
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  Lee Hammock. I love me.
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  A self love journal available on Amazon helps people rebuild
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  their self love and authenticity before doing it after a tax
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  relationship. Y'all but yeah, let's hop into
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  this thing. So yes, yes, yes, the downfall
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  of a narcissist. And this is just, yeah, this is
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  just my, this is my podcast, so this is my perspective on it.
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  Other people are going to have differing perspectives and
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  things like that. So before we have to like
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  before, like this is a pop quiz, what do you think is the main
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  thing that leads to the downfall of a narcissist, Relationship
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  wise, career wise, whatever. What do you think?
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  Put in the comment section, think it really quickly, push
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  pause for five seconds, write it down, think it.
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  Or you can just keep listening and thinking.
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  You know, just think about it. So to me, the downfall of a of
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  most narcissistic people, just from my perspective, is the
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  inability to just let them. The inability to be vulnerable,
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  the inability to let the to just put their ego aside, the
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  inability to face shame. I know they sound like 3
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  different things, but there's all, there's one big thing,
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  y'all of avoiding vulnerability. Because vulnerability is
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  vulnerability is the ego. Vulnerability is shame.
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  You see what I'm saying? You protect the you scared to be
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  vulnerable because you don't want your ego to get hurt.
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  Because if your ego get hurts, there's less shame in you.
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  See how there's a cycle right there?
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  So the inability to be vulnerable, it's to me, it's
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  what the main thing that leads to narcissistic people's
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  downfall. Because vulnerability is not
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  just, you know, being open and talking to other people about
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  your emotions and feelings. Vulnerability is honestly within
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  oneself. The ability to be honest with
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  yourself in certain situations, the ability to just admit to, to
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  be able to take criticism. Vulnerability looks different to
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  every single type of person I know.
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  People think vulnerability is just like me being vulnerable to
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  my wife or you being vulnerable to your husband and to your
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  partner, to your spouse or whoever you, whoever you're
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  with. You know, you being vulnerable
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  to your kids and things of that nature, just having those
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  vulnerable conversations, so to speak.
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  But to me the main thing, like I said, vulnerability, it has so
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  many vulnerability is, you know, it's it doesn't have a shape.
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  It's amorphous. You know it's one of those
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  things that just can it just can continue to shape shift and what
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  not for whoever's experiencing it because vulnerability, like I
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  say it's the ability to take criticism because criticism hits
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  the ego. Criticism constructed, you know,
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  by because most racist, constructive criticism doesn't
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  exist. Y'all know that, right?
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  To most narcissists and and or toxic people, constructive
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  criticism doesn't exist because it's all criticism.
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  If it's not praised, it's criticism.
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  If you're not praising me, you're Downing me.
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  If you're not trying to help me, you're trying to hurt me.
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  If you're not lifting me up, you're pulling me down.
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  It's just black and white thinking, you know, so the
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  inability to open yourself up, to hear in a different
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  perspective, to being to being wrong, like yeah, you hear so
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  even the the ability to admit you're wrong is vulnerability.
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  Vulnerability is a big umbrella y'all that covers so many
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  things. Most narcissists lack this, even
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  to some of the self aware ones. Y'all.
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  That's the crazy thing about it. I know people see self aware
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  narcissist and you automatically assume that that person, that
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  person is vulnerable because they say they they self aware.
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  They have been to therapy, they have been diagnosed.
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  But self aware does not come. It's not, it's not a one
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  one-size-fits-all type of thing. There's so many different
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  dynamics that this fits. You know what I'm saying?
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  Self aware I can. I can be self aware narcissist
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  and go to one therapy session. I can be a self aware narcissist
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  and not go to one therapy session, just get diagnosed by
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  my prison psych. You see what I'm saying?
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  I could be acceptable that all of that makes me a selfaware
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  narcissist, but it doesn't mean I'm a better narcissist.
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  And some of that doesn't even require vulnerability because
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  you can take you take the MM, the MM PI2 which is one of the
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  tests that developed to diagnose personal eye disorders.
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  You go in there and lie on it. You can go in there and and try
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  to be try to do anything in your in your power to not be
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  vulnerable, to lie about how you really feel to lie about certain
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  things. And they have a lot kind of they
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  have the damn lie detective built into the test.
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  So you're they have the deception.
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  They they could read. They can detect deception in the
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  test so you even if you're not vulnerable, you can get
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  diagnosed as a nurse. Diagnosis does not require
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  vulnerability. Continuing therapy.
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  Continuing to put work in and to try to better yourself that
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  requires vulnerability, the ability to go in and be honest.
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  Like hey therapist, I cheated on my husband and This is why.
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  Hey therapist, I have trouble loving my kids and this is, can
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  you help me out? Hate therapist.
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  I have trouble connecting to other people in my life.
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  I hate therapist. You know that's right there.
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  It's vulnerability because like I said, you can get diagnosed
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  and go in there and lie about a lot of stuff.
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  Like that's what I'm just saying.
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  Vulnerability. The inability to be vulnerable
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  keeps so many narcissist. Like I said, literally single
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  and hurting and sad as hell because that's how it goes.
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  I'm just telling you, the inability to do all this stuff
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  keeps so many people sad as hell.
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  Because like your your wife is about to leave you or your
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  husband about to leave and they just want to hear you say a
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  certain set of words and you know what words they're looking
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  for. You know what actions that
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  they're looking for. And you still can't do it.
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  They still can't do it. They know what they they know
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  what you need to hear to keep you happy.
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  And something in the inside of them is just like, Nope.
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  The ego is so thick. The ego is tin layers thick.
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  The shame is right there waiting to come in and take them over.
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  And they just like, no, but I will not be vulnerable.
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  I'm not letting the wall down. I'm not letting my vulnerability
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  cloak down. You know, you ever seen Harry
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  Potter the the Invisibility Invisibility cloak?
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  That's the Vulnerability cloak. They just throw it on.
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  They throw it on themselves and cloak themselves.
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  And I'm not being vulnerable. I'm not taking my cloak off.
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  You know you're not going to see you not.
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  It's just like the Invisibility Cloak.
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  You're not going to see when I put this cloak on, you're not
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  going to see me. You mean when I put this cloak
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  of vulnerability on, you're not going to be able to see me.
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  I'm going to inherit, you know, inherently I'm going to
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  disappear. I'm going to disappear from
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  accountability. I'm going to disappear from
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  being held accountable. I'm going to, I'm going to
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  disappear from so many different things.
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  It's going to make a damn head spin.
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  So that vulnerability cloak is very much like the invisibility
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  cloak that Harry Potter just usually wear.
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  So it's just kind of, it's very, very simpler, you know, but
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  that's a very different space to be in.
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  It's a very unique dynamic to be in.
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  Because most, yeah, being realistic with Y'all, most
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  narcissists are never going to get to the point where they
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  actually want to be vulnerable, where they see a there has to be
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  a benefit in the vulnerability. My benefit is literally to keep
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  my not to keep my family together because that's a
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  benefit, but also to keep myself together.
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  You know, me working on myself and being vulnerable in therapy
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  and vulnerable online. And so, like, that helps to keep
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  my family together, but it also helps keep me together.
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  That's the I feel like that's the most important thing is
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  keeping me together, which allows me to be a better person,
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  which allows me to keep my family together.
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  You know, it's a it's a circle, It's a cycle right there.
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  Just being in that space and within that dynamic and that
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  piece, that's why I tell people y'all like you are if you are
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  dealing with a narcissistic person, y'all, if you're dealing
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  with a narcissist, toxic person, whoever, don't expect, like,
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  they're going to. They might give you brief
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  moments of vulnerability, right? They might give you brief
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  moments of open honesty and be able to take it here and there.
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  But it's the consistency that makes a big difference, a brief
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  moment of vulnerability. It's not going to make up for
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  20-30 years of a toxic relationship.
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  You know what I mean? There's nothing that's going to
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  make up for the 20 or 30 years of treating you a certain type
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  of way, a brief moment of vulnerability.
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  Oh, here's a here's a brief moment for you.
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  What good is they do you right now, 20 years later, five years
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  later, one year later? You know, does that make up for
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  it doesn't make the pain to go. It doesn't make the pain you've
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  been suffering go away. Does it?
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  Nope, it absolutely doesn't. So as I tell people, like you
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  are in a very unique space to be, you know, to keep your, to
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  keep your stuff together. But if you're done with the
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  narcissist, they have to want to be vulnerable.
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  It's not just about therapy and getting help, the vulnerability.
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  It has to be there because if not, they're going to just, it's
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  going to lead to the downfall. Like I said, not just the
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  relationship downfall, it's going to lead to financial
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  downfalls, it's career downfall, raising your kids downfall,
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  relationship with your children downfall, friends and family
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  downfall. It's going to lead to the
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  downfall of so many different aspects of their lives.
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  And they just don't want to do anything about it because
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  they're vulnerable. They don't want to be
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  vulnerable. They don't want to drop their
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  ego. They don't want to drop their
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  guard. They don't want to take any type
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  of criticism. They don't want to be.
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  They don't want to be wrong, for lack of a better word.
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  They don't want to be wrong. Some narcissists just don't want
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  to be wrong because the wrongness, again, you have to be
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  vulnerable to admit that you were wrong.
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  It's. Yeah, it's just it goes so deep.
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  And I know people just like that one word vulnerable is it holds
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  a lot of power. Yeah, it does.
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  It holds a tremendous amount of power.
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  It holds. It absolutely holds a tremendous
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  amount of power. And that's how it's how it's
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  going to be that, you know, the ego is so big.
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  With Narciss as y'all, They have to be willing to let the ego
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  guard the guard down to be able to get some help, to be able to
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  treat you better, to be able to be better.
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  They have to be able to let that down.
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  Because if they're don't, if they're not willing to let that
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  down, then you have this is who you have to deal with, Y'all.
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  If they're not willing to be open, honest and vulnerable,
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  this is who you have to deal with.
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  And this is me being realistic that this is who you have to do.
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  And I know it sucks to hear that now telling people, but this
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  leads to the downfall of so many narcissists just overall in
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  their lives. Because they don't want to be
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  vulnerable because like in this, then this.
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  I'll wrap it up with this right here.
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  Y'all, as a child, something probably happened to this child,
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  happened to this person when they were a kid, that when they
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  were vulnerable they end up getting hurt.
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  So they shut themselves down. Because that's what happened to
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  me. I I got this story is in my
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  playlist, the self aware Sunday's playlist, my very first
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  episode. I tried to be vulnerable and I
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  got shut down and I I I tried to be vulnerable and I got hurt
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  repeatedly and I was like okay no more.
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  And this 7-8 years old, y'all me shutting down based on that.
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  And that's the way to work. That's the way the mind goes
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  sometimes. Y'all, you don't say you have to
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  empower yourself. You have to be able to keep
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  moving forward in these situations.
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  Because some yeah, something might have happened in their
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  childhood, but it doesn't justify or excuse the way
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  they're treating you as an adult.
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  So don't let don't get slipped up and caught up with that right
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  there. Because it happens quite a bit
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  where a lot of people the narcissist person might have had
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  a bad childhood but that doesn't justify how you're living your
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  life right now or how they're treating you right now.
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  Hey with y'all thank you I'm tuning in make sure you like to
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  subscribe. You made it this for y'all
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  please help grow the channel helps reach more people like it
• 11:10
  Reached it reached you because somebody else decided to liking
• 11:13
  comment. You may stay tuned for more like
• 11:15
  a subscriber to do this is that peace Thanks so much for making
• 11:18
  this into my video y'all if you haven't already make sure you
• 11:21
  check out my self love journal on Amazon Lee Hammock I love me
• 11:25
  a self love journal. Help you rebuild their self love
• 11:27
  and authenticity after a touch relationship.
• 11:29
  Thank you.