Latest / Stuff Mom Never Told You / Happy Hour #51: The Power of Female Sex (SATC Ep. 5)
Transcript
- 0:05Speaker 1: Hey, this is Annie and Samantha and welcome to Steph
- 0:07Speaker 1: I never told your production of iHeart Radio, and welcome
- 0:19Speaker 1: to another segment of Sex in the City viewing with
- 0:24Speaker 1: any who's never seen it before. We are on episode five,
- 0:29Speaker 1: so slowly coming through with our watch and viewing parties
- 0:37Speaker 1: and hopefully you all enjoying it as well. Um. Again,
- 0:40Speaker 1: we can release the watch along with us if you
- 0:43Speaker 1: were interested. If you want like a riff tracks, we
- 0:47Speaker 1: can do that. We can do like like a Sunday release.
- 0:51Speaker 1: Can we ask for more money? I'm just kidding, um,
- 0:54Speaker 1: but we are on episode five and can you give
- 0:57Speaker 1: us a recap of all the recaps? Okay, okay, let
- 1:01Speaker 1: me try to make it different than the last week gap.
- 1:03Speaker 1: I did. So we got introduced to the characters. They
- 1:06Speaker 1: went to a club. They made a lot of nineties
- 1:08Speaker 1: references that probably many of us don't get, and there
- 1:15Speaker 1: they talked about many topics that we still discussed today,
- 1:20Speaker 1: including the differences between how men and women have sex.
- 1:24Speaker 1: I would say, beauty versus intelligent stereotypes. Um. And then
- 1:32Speaker 1: we had twenties something's versus thirties somethings and what does
- 1:39Speaker 1: that look like for thirty something women to date twenty
- 1:41Speaker 1: something men and it being a designer drug, and then
- 1:44Speaker 1: also single women and married women and the great divide
- 1:48Speaker 1: that they discussed the Bay of pigs or the Bay
- 1:52Speaker 1: of married pigs. Yes, alright, alright, so that's good. That's good.
- 1:56Speaker 1: So we are now on episode five and the title
- 1:59Speaker 1: of this episode is The Power of Female Sex. What
- 2:05Speaker 1: do you think that means. I'm very intrigued by this
- 2:09Speaker 1: because I saw the title and I was like, Oh,
- 2:12Speaker 1: that's an interesting title. I'm wondering. I think I'm way
- 2:17Speaker 1: off with this, but I'm wondering if there is kind
- 2:21Speaker 1: of a plot line of either withholding women withholding sex
- 2:27Speaker 1: and the power that comes they feel that comes from
- 2:30Speaker 1: that and getting men to do stuff through doing that,
- 2:34Speaker 1: or the opposite. And I know this is cheating, but
- 2:38Speaker 1: this is just my brain working, or the opposite of
- 2:43Speaker 1: really being able to to pleasure a man in this
- 2:48Speaker 1: case goes okay. People are keeping score, and he's probably
- 2:57Speaker 1: been scoring about need a sixty percent in most of
- 3:01Speaker 1: the episodes. I'm getting a solid half star, so she
- 3:06Speaker 1: would be failings. And we're starting I'm kind of somebody
- 3:28Speaker 1: Oh Sham is coming in and saying, she's kind of somebody.
- 3:31Speaker 1: I have never felt confident enough to say that in
- 3:33Speaker 1: my entire life. Are we somebody? Are you somebody to me?
- 3:38Speaker 1: If you need to open a restaurant that allows me
- 3:40Speaker 1: to go to the popular, can we please talk about
- 3:48Speaker 1: because where lunch somewhere else or somewhere like New Jersey
- 3:50Speaker 1: where we might actually get seated. Do you realize if
- 3:54Speaker 1: she were a man, not only would we be eating
- 3:56Speaker 1: right now, but they'd be sending over free drinks. Say
- 4:00Speaker 1: I'm saying, if it was a man, Sam would have
- 4:02Speaker 1: gotten her way. Yeah, if she had bribed a man
- 4:06Speaker 1: or gone up to a man, he would have given
- 4:08Speaker 1: her her way. That's interesting, very very well. He has
- 4:15Speaker 1: a finely little penis, but he knows exactly at carry
- 4:20Speaker 1: ran into her Italian friend who was dating and a
- 4:23Speaker 1: man named Carlos who just bought the shoes for her,
- 4:26Speaker 1: which were like four shoes from this man, And apparently
- 4:32Speaker 1: the dude has a tiny penis. Yeah, she told her that. Um,
- 4:37Speaker 1: that's also probably a thing I wouldn't tell someone. Times
- 4:40Speaker 1: I would tell someone I talked to my girl, So
- 4:44Speaker 1: I can't lie. I think in this situation, I wouldn't
- 4:48Speaker 1: know my super close friends, like super close friends who
- 4:51Speaker 1: were talking about relationships, we were talking about sucks. I
- 4:53Speaker 1: would probably tell them, Oh, they haven't a game, right,
- 5:00Speaker 1: poker night. I love it. I do love that this
- 5:03Speaker 1: is happening for this show because I've never seen a
- 5:06Speaker 1: group of women just having a poker night. Yeah, and
- 5:09Speaker 1: TV that is It's been a minute since I played poker,
- 5:12Speaker 1: but I used to have some girl poker night. Yeah,
- 5:15Speaker 1: that held poker box. My partner has a whole set,
- 5:20Speaker 1: and he brought it out like he has a matt
- 5:22Speaker 1: He has like all the things. It puts mine to shame,
- 5:30Speaker 1: The Rain of Bob, the Harvard Love of Lorrain of Bob.
- 5:33Speaker 1: It you told me about her? I don't you don't
- 5:36Speaker 1: know that? Oh my goodnes That guys see a lot
- 5:39Speaker 1: of the listeners. She's the one that cut off her
- 5:42Speaker 1: husband's penis after he raped her. She got convicted and
- 5:46Speaker 1: it was kind of a joke because she threw it
- 5:48Speaker 1: out the window and then he got offered porns. Oh yeah,
- 5:58Speaker 1: Jnai Atties, which, by the way, I know this dude.
- 6:04Speaker 1: So Jilly who is supposed to be a French friend
- 6:08Speaker 1: of Carrie's Italian friend. That's uh, there, who's who bought
- 6:13Speaker 1: her shoes? He is from the coffee commercial that was
- 6:17Speaker 1: really famous at that point in time. It was this
- 6:19Speaker 1: one couple that was in all of the I don't
- 6:21Speaker 1: know those folgers, but and so my mind just goes
- 6:25Speaker 1: to that, and I'm like, I wonder if that's his
- 6:27Speaker 1: one acting gig outside of the commercial, because he I'm
- 6:29Speaker 1: really big with that commercial. I don't have to try
- 6:33Speaker 1: to pull it up. Yeah, we gotta look it up now.
- 6:38Speaker 1: I think you're beautiful right there. I think you're too
- 6:42Speaker 1: charming to be an architect. I think you should immediately.
- 6:48Speaker 1: I do find it funny that she is the joker
- 6:51Speaker 1: of the bunch, like she's so witty, and she was like, oh, come,
- 6:54Speaker 1: but she's always having to perform because I feel like
- 6:56Speaker 1: sometimes I have to do that. Do you feel that way?
- 6:59Speaker 1: I know you're good, was to orytelling I'm good with
- 7:01Speaker 1: one lighter sarcasticness, and I feel like we constantly are
- 7:05Speaker 1: doing that for everyone. Yeah. No, it feels very a
- 7:11Speaker 1: lot of interactions they have. It's very much like calculation,
- 7:15Speaker 1: what is this person, what will make them laugh? Will
- 7:17Speaker 1: make them happy? We go and it sounds so callous,
- 7:20Speaker 1: but we all do it, right, I this is my
- 7:23Speaker 1: introverted extrovert itself. Of like, I will come out and
- 7:26Speaker 1: I will perform the hell out of it, but I
- 7:28Speaker 1: will not see you for two more weeks because I've
- 7:30Speaker 1: just exhausted all of my energy doing this. And when
- 7:33Speaker 1: I'm on, I'm on. After that, I'm done for a while,
- 7:37Speaker 1: for a long while. M hm. But that's exactly what
- 7:41Speaker 1: she was doing, which is why she gets brought out
- 7:43Speaker 1: a lot. She comes. I don't think that's ever addressed,
- 7:46Speaker 1: but she well, she does address a little bit storytelling
- 7:48Speaker 1: the couples as a single person, but like in general
- 7:51Speaker 1: as a storyteller. Yeah, you look so beautifully when you
- 7:58Speaker 1: see you want to disturb you. She looks much better
- 8:02Speaker 1: than I do when I went up in the morning. Absolutely,
- 8:05Speaker 1: I definitely have become the look of the haggard wood,
- 8:09Speaker 1: which I'm scared of myself. Oh God, is that me?
- 8:14Speaker 1: I look like a corpse that's reanimated, which I think
- 8:17Speaker 1: is fair. I'm not. It doesn't look great, but I
- 8:20Speaker 1: think that's natural. But it does look like I feel
- 8:23Speaker 1: like I've never looked this bad up been to the
- 8:27Speaker 1: last two years of like, I feel like when I
- 8:29Speaker 1: woke up in the morning. Previously I didn't scare myself,
- 8:33Speaker 1: and now I am at that point. I do think though,
- 8:36Speaker 1: this is a good thing to know about movies and
- 8:39Speaker 1: TV other entertainment. She's clearly wearing makeup, and that's a
- 8:44Speaker 1: is that in Marvelous ms Maizel she wakes up at
- 8:47Speaker 1: like four am to put on makeup. So the guy
- 8:50Speaker 1: that was definitely brisemaids she wakes up on makeup and
- 8:54Speaker 1: goes back to like, oh no, just okay, Carrie just
- 8:59Speaker 1: left with this man and it woke up with a
- 9:02Speaker 1: lot of cash. M all right, So Charlotte, is that
- 9:09Speaker 1: the artist's house that they were kind of fearful of.
- 9:13Speaker 1: I have to say, I feel like this is a
- 9:15Speaker 1: very relatable thing too, if you have to question this
- 9:18Speaker 1: unfortunately with older men or just men in general. So
- 9:23Speaker 1: she's trying to get his art for her gallery, and
- 9:27Speaker 1: he's showing her his artworks. I've ever come to pure
- 9:32Speaker 1: universal God force God. Oh, that would make be nervous
- 9:35Speaker 1: for sure. Oh oh no, oh my. So when we're
- 9:44Speaker 1: talking about female secks, we are actually talking about vaginas,
- 9:47Speaker 1: which is very very Yes, probably as we would say,
- 9:51Speaker 1: it's not necessarily all just women, so let's leave it
- 9:55Speaker 1: at that. However, we are talking about, Yes, the vagina.
- 9:59Speaker 1: He likes to d all and paint vaginas Georgia O'Keefe.
- 10:03Speaker 1: That's amazing and I love her arm. I'm not gonna lie. Yeah,
- 10:06Speaker 1: I guess coming from a man though, does feel a
- 10:09Speaker 1: lot of creepier. And just the way he's talking about it,
- 10:12Speaker 1: it would be again I would just be like, oh no,
- 10:17Speaker 1: this just some kind of overture or something, and then
- 10:23Speaker 1: it's the most powerful woman in Manhattan asked me for hostess.
- 10:29Speaker 1: Oh sure, universal connector. I've been in this situation from
- 10:38Speaker 1: out for me. Actually, a young girl is having her
- 10:41Speaker 1: first period. I happen to be there and shrinking out
- 10:43Speaker 1: the bathroom. She was on the phone with her mom,
- 10:45Speaker 1: and I was like, I gosh, you girl, what do
- 10:46Speaker 1: you mean. We never had a problem getting a table
- 10:51Speaker 1: at Ballsack, but that exchange made them friends forever. On
- 10:55Speaker 1: the list. There's something it's about women's bathrooms really can
- 10:59Speaker 1: bring other women together, like just strange women. And we've
- 11:01Speaker 1: seen many stories, but I think it does happen that way. Yeah,
- 11:06Speaker 1: I think over things like periods, but also just women
- 11:09Speaker 1: crying in we do kind of gather ourselves over there
- 11:13Speaker 1: or we're having a bad situation to trying to get
- 11:15Speaker 1: out of it. Yep, we run to the bathroom sometimes.
- 11:37Speaker 1: And and okay, Annie, so you were wait, well, I
- 11:43Speaker 1: definitely think I mrad the title And okay, I had
- 11:47Speaker 1: that in my head even though you said it. What
- 11:52Speaker 1: did you think the title was? No, I need to know. No,
- 11:57Speaker 1: I got it right. I thought there was. I thought
- 11:59Speaker 1: you said that power of the female sex, which would
- 12:01Speaker 1: have changed it for me. No, No, that the power
- 12:04Speaker 1: of female sex said the same time. So I tell
- 12:06Speaker 1: you I regret nothing good. Okay. So obviously this is
- 12:10Speaker 1: about specifically the vagina and the power of the vagina
- 12:15Speaker 1: um and women in sex and in general, like power
- 12:18Speaker 1: of money coming into play all of that, and you
- 12:22Speaker 1: were close. But yeah, you definitely don't get more than
- 12:24Speaker 1: on this one. I'm sorry. My lowest score is has
- 12:28Speaker 1: gonna definitely put you down on the average. I'm sorry,
- 12:32Speaker 1: but we do. And this is kind of funny because, yeah,
- 12:34Speaker 1: the previous episodes, Sam talks about exchange of power and
- 12:38Speaker 1: she even says that in this episode, but we don't
- 12:40Speaker 1: really see that exchange of power with her who may
- 12:43Speaker 1: have been the one person who really takes that too hard, like, yeah,
- 12:47Speaker 1: my sex is powerful. We will find different episodes when
- 12:50Speaker 1: she talks about that, but we don't really see it
- 12:53Speaker 1: in this episode, which I thought was funny. It is
- 12:55Speaker 1: focusing more on Charlotte, more on Carrie obviously, and a
- 12:59Speaker 1: little bit of Randa with her power over Skipper. I
- 13:03Speaker 1: find it interesting because I told you, and I think
- 13:06Speaker 1: I've told people about the incident, that I did get
- 13:08Speaker 1: money at one point in time, not because I paid,
- 13:11Speaker 1: but like a miscommunication and I refused to talk to
- 13:13Speaker 1: him again and I kept some money, but not exactly
- 13:20Speaker 1: the same thing, of course, And maybe that's more of
- 13:23Speaker 1: like my embarrassment of it all. But I do find
- 13:27Speaker 1: it interesting. I have never been offered money, but when
- 13:30Speaker 1: we talk about an exchange of power, that is a
- 13:32Speaker 1: conversation that does happen. What I do like about the
- 13:37Speaker 1: Charlotte perspective, even though I'm like, yeah, this could get
- 13:40Speaker 1: really creepy really fast, it is the idea that the
- 13:42Speaker 1: vagina holds a lot of power, which is kind of funny,
- 13:47Speaker 1: but it's true, which is also why we talk about
- 13:50Speaker 1: how when we have conversations of politics or policies really
- 13:55Speaker 1: trying to control, and that having a fear of what
- 13:59Speaker 1: can come out of what can be done because of
- 14:03Speaker 1: any of these things. I don't want to get too
- 14:05Speaker 1: into it, but we'll talk about war crimes or threatening
- 14:08Speaker 1: women that the first thing is to take the power
- 14:11Speaker 1: away in that aspect, you know what I mean. But I, yeah,
- 14:14Speaker 1: it is definitely a different take with this one. Yeah,
- 14:20Speaker 1: And I find it really really interesting that because coming
- 14:23Speaker 1: from the show not knowing much about it, I did
- 14:28Speaker 1: for some reason, I always think I would be a Charlotte.
- 14:30Speaker 1: Now now I don't think so. But for some reason
- 14:32Speaker 1: I was always like m because I was like, she's
- 14:35Speaker 1: pretty conservative and doesn't really like sex and not doesn't
- 14:39Speaker 1: like sex, but is anxious about it, and this about it.
- 14:43Speaker 1: I find it interesting that she agreed, because that's kind
- 14:47Speaker 1: of the ambition power exchange that we're talking about, in
- 14:50Speaker 1: that transactional nature of sex that we're talking about, and
- 14:55Speaker 1: for her to do it kind of surprised me. Um,
- 15:01Speaker 1: I can see that. Yeah, I guess I never thought
- 15:03Speaker 1: of it because of the way it played out. The
- 15:06Speaker 1: biggest like contention in all of it is, of course,
- 15:10Speaker 1: the back and forth between Sam and I think they
- 15:12Speaker 1: had the perfect characters to debate it, which is Sam
- 15:15Speaker 1: and Miranda and yeah, talking about what is the cost
- 15:18Speaker 1: of this and versus what is the cost of you know,
- 15:22Speaker 1: the power of sex, and we actually do go back
- 15:25Speaker 1: to like good sex like kind of like that you
- 15:28Speaker 1: were talking about, but even the fact that, yes, they're
- 15:33Speaker 1: talking about the vagina being you know, such an art
- 15:37Speaker 1: form or something so miraculous. But we also talk about
- 15:41Speaker 1: the fact that you know, sex and what it can
- 15:44Speaker 1: buy or what it can get type of thing from women,
- 15:47Speaker 1: but also about like the woman holding power within a restaurant,
- 15:50Speaker 1: like even that. But I do find it interesting that
- 15:54Speaker 1: two of those perspective were mel lead like whether it
- 15:57Speaker 1: was the dude who she had sex with left money
- 16:00Speaker 1: and so like that wasn't it who had the power?
- 16:02Speaker 1: Who who said they had power? As well as um
- 16:05Speaker 1: in the one that's like there's so many women that
- 16:07Speaker 1: influenced my life that he had to do vaginas um
- 16:11Speaker 1: and wanted and you know it just it was very
- 16:13Speaker 1: like still under a male gaze even with that. Yeah,
- 16:18Speaker 1: I mean it's still very women being the gatekeeper's responsibility
- 16:22Speaker 1: on you um as a woman, and therefore you get
- 16:26Speaker 1: blamed for having the sex or not having sex, but
- 16:29Speaker 1: it's also really interesting, like thinking again about why would
- 16:34Speaker 1: I leave this money. That's also such a power play
- 16:38Speaker 1: is to be like unless kind of like how Miranda said,
- 16:43Speaker 1: the friend of hers was kind of hooking up as
- 16:48Speaker 1: if it's a high escort type of like like classy
- 16:52Speaker 1: escort level of not realizing and so he assumed that's
- 16:55Speaker 1: what this was. Because again, there's nothing, honestly on with
- 17:00Speaker 1: any of this. There's nothing an exchange of conversation, of consent,
- 17:05Speaker 1: of no harm, all of those things. You're controlling it.
- 17:07Speaker 1: If you are controlling it and you're you are happy
- 17:10Speaker 1: with where this is, with any like sex work in general,
- 17:14Speaker 1: then wonderful you do you like, I don't understand why
- 17:17Speaker 1: we would demonize it, But at the same time, like
- 17:20Speaker 1: she didn't know what was happening, she felt like and
- 17:22Speaker 1: maybe that is Maybe this is an old fashioned rhetoric
- 17:25Speaker 1: against sex work in general, because they do make the
- 17:29Speaker 1: Italian friend look really bad in conversation of who she is,
- 17:33Speaker 1: and maybe like, hey, she's happy, she's getting light like
- 17:37Speaker 1: I'm like, man, OK, she's going through things and she
- 17:44Speaker 1: is where she wants to be and she's controlling it.
- 17:47Speaker 1: Cool you do you, you do you. I love it,
- 17:50Speaker 1: but again, like without carrying knowing what's going on, it
- 17:54Speaker 1: does make you feel a little bit wary of the situation.
- 17:57Speaker 1: But yeah, maybe this is a kind of look of like, hey,
- 18:00Speaker 1: I think you're looking at this in a different wrong
- 18:02Speaker 1: perspective or misleading perspective. This could be what this was
- 18:07Speaker 1: or what this could be, but again missing a lot
- 18:09Speaker 1: of background story that we're putting into it. I think
- 18:15Speaker 1: that's a good point because I think historically we've had
- 18:17Speaker 1: a long history of demonizing sex workers and like this
- 18:23Speaker 1: power dynamic that does exist, and we don't talk about
- 18:27Speaker 1: enough between like sex and who has the power in
- 18:30Speaker 1: it that you know, we should always examine these messages
- 18:33Speaker 1: that it's kind of implying like it's bad to be
- 18:37Speaker 1: thought as as a sex worker. I get the I
- 18:40Speaker 1: do totally get the like, well why did you think that?
- 18:43Speaker 1: But as long as you're not like that's bad. Yeah,
- 18:50Speaker 1: I actually happened, now that I think about it. I
- 18:52Speaker 1: have been offered money for sex once in Italy outside
- 18:58Speaker 1: the Vatican, and he said, this guy said to me,
- 19:04Speaker 1: you can make ten dollars an hour as a secretary,
- 19:07Speaker 1: or you could make sixty dollars in one hour. If
- 19:10Speaker 1: you suck again, do you approach? Approach of that is
- 19:17Speaker 1: so bad? So like six No, now you say that.
- 19:25Speaker 1: I did have an ongoing joke because I was a
- 19:29Speaker 1: good friend with this couple and the wife was gone,
- 19:32Speaker 1: but I had hung out with the husband and we
- 19:35Speaker 1: were with his law firm, and at one point in time,
- 19:39Speaker 1: I just made a joke. I was like, yeah, I'm
- 19:40Speaker 1: his mistress because I'm like, they were like, how do
- 19:43Speaker 1: you know Jervis? And that was and I shouldn't have,
- 19:46Speaker 1: but it was just that, but they truly believed it
- 19:48Speaker 1: um and to the fact that that I'm like, interesting,
- 19:52Speaker 1: I did feel that because one of the guys were like, so,
- 19:54Speaker 1: how how much do you make? And I'm like, oh no,
- 19:57Speaker 1: what do I do now? Because it should and me
- 20:00Speaker 1: and I shouldn't have. That's not the joke that I
- 20:02Speaker 1: should have made. I think I was just trying to
- 20:04Speaker 1: figure out how to get out of like having a
- 20:06Speaker 1: conversation with lawyers, and that did not work out the
- 20:08Speaker 1: way I wanted. Yeah, yeah, I'd agree, I'd agree all
- 20:16Speaker 1: that to say, but yeah, I think there's a bigger conversation.
- 20:19Speaker 1: As we always do. We always like having bigger conversations
- 20:22Speaker 1: behind the story. But it is an interesting aspect of
- 20:25Speaker 1: what they brought in sex of the city and how
- 20:28Speaker 1: they decided to go over this route and what this
- 20:30Speaker 1: looked like. But yeah, you're wrong, all right. Maybe next
- 20:37Speaker 1: time I'll get it, But for now I will accept
- 20:41Speaker 1: the loss for what it is. I have what I
- 20:49Speaker 1: think I can do it. I have faith in you.
- 20:51Speaker 1: But in the meantime, listeners, we hope you're enjoying this
- 20:54Speaker 1: um and you're watching along or not watching along, but
- 20:56Speaker 1: still laughing along with us and having these conversations ends.
- 21:00Speaker 1: And we would always love to hear from you your thoughts,
- 21:04Speaker 1: any suggestions you have. You can email us at stuff
- 21:06Speaker 1: and your mom Stuff at I Hurt Me You dot com.
- 21:08Speaker 1: You can find us on Twitter at mom Stuff podcast
- 21:10Speaker 1: or on Instagram at Stuff. I've Never Told You. Thanks.
- 21:12Speaker 1: It's always to our super producer Christina so I made
- 21:15Speaker 1: you uncomfortable. Always thanks to you for listening Stuff I
- 21:21Speaker 1: Never Told you, the production of I Heart Radio. For
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