Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #131 Body Slamming, Touching Towels And Sleeping Rules

Transcript

#131 Body Slamming, Touching Towels And Sleeping Rules · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Six week picks stepped it up, but not Yeah, it's
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Australia's fast bowler. I don't think I could do seven.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Seven would be really get it and jam it's okay.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: I was going to say these are rookie numbers. On
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: I reckon I could do double that, and I'm happy
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: for you to challenge me if you want to go
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: down that track.
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: And if you want to have a week bix eating
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: competition also not sponsored.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: But if you'd like to get on board, wee bigs fourteen.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: I reckon, I reckon anywhere between twelve and fifteen.
• 0:28
  Speaker 3: I can eat. I'm not even fucking scared. Bro, what
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: you reckon?
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: You could eat? You could eat more on that? Okay, well,
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: why are you only eating sick? Because I got I've
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: got kids to get out the door. But eximple, I'm
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: just like shot kids on many weekbis in two hours.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: The kids are like, daddy, I'm like for school.
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: There's a good counting exercise for them.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: They're like, why daddy can eat like sixteen week bigs?
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: How many would you normally have? I reckon twenty. Let's go,
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: I reckon I could hit to it. I reckon a
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: whole packet, I could eat it.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: Shut the fuck up, you can't eat twenty week pigs.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: Dirty tonguereu can get all flustered about the wheat pigs.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to two doting dads. I am Maddie Jay
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: and I'm Ash And this is a podcast all about parenting.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: It is the good, this is a bad and the relatable.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: And one thing that it's not is a podcast that
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: gives advice.
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: I would say that's scratch, So that's correct. Thank you
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: very much. Ash. You you had to get prompted to
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: know something about me. I did. I've noticed that you
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: have removed said beard that was on thy face of you.
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: My daughter called it a chin called a chin trim,
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: a chin trim. She's like, you got a chin trim.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: That's clever. Where did you get that from? That sounds
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: like a nana?
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: That sounds like, oh, well, chin trim. I decided to
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: shave it this morning.
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you look fresh. Your face looks skinny.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: You know when you like, you go away somewhere for
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: ages and you come back and you see like your
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: pet again. You're like, you look so young.
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: You look at different pet again. Have you ever noticed
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: that you.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: Think I look young. You look young. It looks have
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: you ever have you ever had a beard that you shaved?
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: Probably you're always quite well kept, but have you ever
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: done it? And then notice that it kind of stinks
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: under there? No, neither of I do you know what?
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: Yesterday as well, took Iggy, the small dog of mine,
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: to the groomers and me and Oscar and people up
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: and I bring Iggy into the car and that's not eggy,
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: stupid kid say, like the dogs stunk. I I kind
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: of smelled. Laura had joked about the fact that it
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: was a bit smelly. Were you cleaning it? Yeah? Bro,
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: well we're not just whatever shampoo is in't there? Shampoo? Shampoo?
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: What else he meant to do?
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: Facial cleanse?
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: You look pretty good under there, like you could have
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: it could have sweat and like around here it was.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: It was so flaky.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: It was really flaky and kind of smelled like palmes
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: and cheese. And I was like, I was like, I
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: better have a quick shower before I did the school run.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, your best too. Otherwise looks good. Thank you. You're
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: still got a bit of great. That's what you're great
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: comes through, isn't it.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: Thank you?
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: For reminding me. But Laura couldn't kiss me, couldn't kiss me.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: I just don't back parmas and cheese because it smelled
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: like palms and cheese. Yeah, yeah, she was. She's like,
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: when do you go to fucking get rid of it?
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: And I just liked it. I liked it.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: Ore. You and I are very different. The more April
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: tells me to get rid of something, the longer I
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: keep it.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: Well, I it's been what three weeks now since the
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: jungle has been so for three weeks Laura has been begging, pleading,
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: if you will, ash yea to have it removed and
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: finally gone. Well, I just I enjoyed having sex without kissing.
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: It's the best. It's nice. It feels like it's efficient.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: It's very transact.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: It's very transaction. I was like, money's in the on
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: the side table.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: It's as like as that casual card. Hey, how's Vegas?
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: Vegas was good man, I'll be.
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: Honest, it's nice to see you back in one piece.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: It was. It was a lot. It was a lot.
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: There's a lot of pain behind his eyes.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: It was a lot for three nights, Like the night
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: before I went, I was like, my doe. I was
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: going to travel eighteen hours for three nights in Vegas.
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: Did you get the upgrade? Nah?
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: Look, I the flight over is fine because it's I
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: left in the middle of the day. So it's like
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: it's pretty much just like an Aarvo drinking session on
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: a plane. That's pretty much all it is. By yourself. Yeah,
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: that had an American couple next to me and they're like,
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: this guy can stack aways some beers. Did you have
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: a quick chat? Yeah, I had a quick chat.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: I bet it was riveting for them.
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: And then it's always awking.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: I just say, it's always awkward if you start the
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: chat too early on, it's hard to know when to breakaway.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: I just got on really drunk and there's all systems go.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: I was respectful. I watched my own things and then
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: we chated a little bit.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: How you have to preface it, like, I was very
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: respectful in the flood, Everything's okay.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: I was considerate. I was considerate drunk they're now Canadians
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: fucking But no, it was good. It was a long
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: it's a long way as you as you know, and
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: like on the way back, I was lucky. I got
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: two spare seeds and slept for like ten hours. But
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: the coldest plane I've ever been on. I looked to
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: the across the aisle and there's a lady there.
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: Look.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: She looked like, you know, homeless man. They got heaps
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: of blankets over their shoulders and they're like, that was freezing,
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: And it was like, would you say anything? Would you
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: make me say change the temperature in the whole plane.
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: Maybe someone bumped the Maybe the air hostess bumped the
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: like control panel and set it to like seventeen instead
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: of twenty one.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: Maybe I reckon they did it on purpose, because you
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: united help.
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: What do they call them again?
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: Not help? Just stand in the barrel and go helper,
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: bring me a drink? Help, fabi, some great young help
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: a woman over that not young? All. I noticed that
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: the demographic are quite old and they're so grumpy. So
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: why is that? You're like, can? I found myself trying
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: to be so overly nice, and then I was like
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: fuck this, And then I was just like, but mus
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: for a drink. It's honestly like you're asking for like
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: the newborn child. They're like, okay, here it is. That's
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: like I'm asking him to land the plane like mid air, like,
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: just get me a drink. I know.
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: It's like probably because they do.
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: They shout out to all the hostesses out there working
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: incredibly hard.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: Except United. Well they obviously work at a job, like
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: especially the Americans, but they don't get tip for that job, right.
• 6:55
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah that much?
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: Do they expect a tip? Maybe they do.
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: Maybe they're like that guy and seat number twenty three,
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: a's not tipping us.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: Wow, that's the case. I owe a lot of fighters.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: It's a lot of money. I saw the biggest Peters
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: I've ever seen gone. So, you know, Vegas Strip, lots
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: of beautiful, fancy hotels and you got MGM, you got Caesars.
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: And it's sort of like you know, if you look
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: at a building like that's a building, but you go
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: to Vegas and you look at the building, you're like, whoa,
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: look at that. You know, it's got a architectural marvels.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: It's a bit tacky, but it's like it's it's.
• 7:31
  Speaker 3: Always trying to be polite to the Americans. I don't
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: obviously dip them.
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: I mean like even the what's the one with the
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: fountains at the front, blag the blu It was.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: Chockers a long. I couldn't even get down the foot path.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: It was just busy, like I don't know. Weather was great.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: You know, last time was a bit windy. This time
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: it was quite nice. Do you have a memory at all?
• 7:52
  Speaker 4: Do you?
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: What's my name? John Windy? I don't remember the weather?
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: Remember they round all the it was. It was one
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: day was windy.
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: We went to go to the pool and we were
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: and the umbrellas are flying and paling people. Now I remember, Sorry.
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: We didn't have that this time.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: It was not beautiful.
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: Wind was good. It was about on the last day.
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: But okay, what how did I say?
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: You're admiring the buildings? How do you then at which
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: point do you then come face to face with a
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: giant penis? It was in one of the building windows.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: So you come around the corner. We come around the corner.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: There's a place called the Lynx, which is like a
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: really old building in the middle of the street, looks
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: so out of place, like it's.
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: It's due for a knockdown.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: It must be like a heritage listed it's like that.
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: You're like, you come around the corner.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: That's building anyway, it's got none of the windows are tinted.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: There's a guy standing there full in the fucking stark right,
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: white guy. What level do you think? It was? Rough?
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: Five levels up? So yeah, not far so he would
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: know that. He's like he was kind of what he's doing. Yeah,
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: because if your level twenty, like this thing hung down
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: to his knee and he was completely shaven, and me
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: and while stop, how long were you looking at him?
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: I was like put my hands and he's just big
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: thumbs up. I had big thumbs up and then he
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: but he was standing there so proud and majestic like
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: he knew what he had. Maybe it was a fake
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: like prosthetic. No, this thing was real, you reckon? He
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: just good on him. Yeah, didn't move, didn't move a
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: muscle and he's just watching the people down And it
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: was like a crowd of people.
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: I was like standing up on like a ledge and
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: I was like.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: Like, same kind of crowds that would go to watch
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: the fountains at Blagia or then watching this guy at links.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, and it goes off every thirty minutes.
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: Highlight of the trip, Wow, No, it wasn't hard.
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: It was huge. What was I thought it was memorable.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: And I know. I'm glad. I'm glad you held on
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: to that story obviously for anyone wondering. You know, this
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: guy was a willing participant. He was putting himself on show.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: He was he was a showman.
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: I wasn't people. I couldn't miss it.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: It wasn't like ash was like breaking into rooms and
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: looking at people's penises.
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: That's a story for another time.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: But no, very good. And I did notice that they're
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: over there this year because it was for the NRL.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: A lot more families man like young families too, so
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: like little kids in their Sharks jersey.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: I said, love love the NRL. Yes, love what they're
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: doing over in Vegas. Is it a family friendly place?
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: Do you know what they did this time? And they've
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: made it way more inclusive? So you know how like
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: Fremont Street was like a night thing. Yeah, they had
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: the Avo entertainment for the kids. They would do on
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: Fremont They would do like the Fox three sixty and
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: the Maddie John Show in the afternoon, so all the
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: kids could be around and there was all the entertainers.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: And would you take Oscar and Macy their next year? No,
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: I live a very different lifestyle to those children. But
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: I actually he spent the games with a young family
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: from the Shire. And funny story how this came about gone.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: I bought tickets on the day, the cheapest tickets, so
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: right at the top and Myles, my friend who went,
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: we were doing hot Labster because it's a beautiful stadium, like.
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: Remember the gorgeous.
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: They know how to do it right, and we're going
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: up the escalator and Miles starts chatting to this guy's
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: got two big things of popcorn, because I was like,
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: where'd you get that popcorn? And he started to give
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: us the spiel about hey, if you buy one of
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: these things.
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: He's got his kids, and he was.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: Like, where are you guys sitting And we're like, oh,
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: we're way at the top, and he goes, oh, we'll
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: way at the top too. Until we started to get
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: up there and I didn't realize his wife is deathly
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: afraid of hide. It's very steep, so steep, and he
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: was like, I went to one of the ladies there.
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: My wife's afraid to hide. So they gave them a
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: full like concrete deck that was like mid level that's
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: usually used for like what still was used for like
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: wheelchairs and stuff that a whole deck.
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: Oh wow.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: And I was like, is that right? Pay used to
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: be scared of heights, and the weasel started weaseling. I
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: was like, your weasel senses would have been like yeah.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: I was like, I'm also deathly afraid of heights. Anyway,
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: he goes come with us, and I went and the
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: lady was like, Jeff tickets. I'm like, yeah, way up.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: They didn't realize I'm definitely afraid of heights. And she
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: was like, oh, there's plenty of room here. I love
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: how you have to put in deathly. I am definitely
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: I'm going to save it. I'm going to sell it.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to be like, oh, I'm afraid of heights.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: So I got to sit. Who will die if I
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: have to stand up there? So I went from a
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: thirty dollars ticket to a two hundred dollar ticket like that.
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: So I just sat there the whole time with his family.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: Were you in a wheelchair? No? I was standing standing
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: there was It was great. Anyway.
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: They had two young girls.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: They go for the sharks and just you know, just
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: run lovely, running the mill sort of families to shout
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: out to those guys.
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: I think his name is Brian anyway, I think.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: But one thing that really shocked me going okay about
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: this family is they had two daughters. One was seven
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: and one was sort of Macy's age, maybe a little
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: bit young. And I was, you know, chatting to the
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: seven year old because she's, you know, having a good time,
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: and I was like, what's your favorite TV show? And
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: she turned around she goes, w w E wow wow.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: Pretty influenced by dad, I reckon is he mom?
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: Oh wow?
• 13:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: And Mum was like, we love it, but she's scared
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: of heights, but she loves she loves wrestling. And apparently
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: the daughter also loves vander Pump and they love popcorn. Yeah.
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: What an interesting bribes, What an interesting family. Yeah wow,
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: it was good to have how they do it in
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: the Shire? Yeah, I was like, I thought she'd like
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: Coca milon or something like that. Yeah, what's what's the
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: one like Gabby's Dollhouse? I was expecting, was not expecting
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: body slams. You see you guys, body slams, you ash,
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: body slams you, body slams you what? Sometimes you know
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: you get body slams? Like I'm confused. One of my missus.
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: I just give a fake laugh.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, but she body slammed you because she
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: she loves the w W.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: Kick me up and she put me between her legs
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: went boof and Paul drove me into the ground. Trying
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: to tell a story here, I'm trying to tell a joke,
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: bro I missed it. Sorry, I couldn't tell. Sorry, I
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: couldn't tell.
• 14:20
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry, Okay, I'm sorry. Very funny, Matthew.
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: I have to have like a little like Tapper under
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: the table. Oh come on, and I just missed that one.
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: You missed a few anyway, body slam I'm just gonna
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: just keep saying it.
• 14:35
  Speaker 3: Yes, okay, anyway, moving on?
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: What was I think?
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: Yes, so Goodrick slammed. I don't get the joke. I
• 14:43
  Speaker 3: don't get it.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: She's seven, oh so like it would take it would
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: take a lot for her to do it well because
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: she's because she you know, you're chatting to a seven
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: year old, and she's like, I'm really missing this joke.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: I'll show you my favorite show. And then she just
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: picked up and.
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: I get it. I do I do. What was saying
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: is if we went back and I asked the question
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: again instead of her giving me the answer. Yeah, we
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: got there. But anyway, I was like, all right, at
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: the end of the night, we're going to go off
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: and do some adult things like godle gausina or do whatever.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, I say, a really nice
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: to meet you, and she.
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: Just goes like John Cena.
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: See didn't laugh the John Cena wave that he does
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: where he runs his hand in front of his Anyway,
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: let's move on. He really thrown me off. Sorry, that's okay,
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: that's okay. Yes, it was good. It was a good
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: trip overall. I didn't know that was I thought she
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: was blind. No, she's definitely afraid of heights.
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: Man.
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: Hey, just quickly, just quickly, you met Ann Woods again?
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: Why am I sweating?
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: Dude?
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: It's a bit warm.
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: It's a bit warm.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, go I did.
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: I ran into Woods you over there. I went in
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: search of him till.
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: We give you a little podcast, a plug new podcast.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: Sure. Yeah, there's something very exciting coming. I'm not leaving
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: here unless you kick me out. One dozing dad. I
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: feel like I'm in a relationship where I'm allowing my
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: partner to have sex.
• 16:15
  Speaker 3: With other people. That sounds amazing.
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: I'm not watching you record with Aaron Woods.
• 16:21
  Speaker 3: You can if you're but I've.
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: Got a chair.
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: Did you put a chair in the corner. I'll just
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: sit there in silence watching you guys. You have a podcast.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: Yes, it's called NRLs.
• 16:34
  Speaker 3: I don't think we've actually got a name for it yet,
• 16:37
  Speaker 3: so okay, sorry, I shouldn't.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: She should laugh. It's not me. That's unorganized. But it
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: sounds about right. It's called nrl ACES. Is it out?
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: It will? We are recording next week for the first time,
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: so it could be a mess.
• 16:50
  Speaker 3: No, I'm sure to be fine. I'm sure to be fine.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: It's all about football, of course, but it's a bit
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: different because it's more like the armchair expert versus the expert.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: And then we have a host, which one of you.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: I am definitely not an expert. I'm an arm chair.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: I'm the sort of guy who was still on the
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: couch and when like he throws the ball for oh,
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: drops the ball, he goes. I would have called that like.
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: That sort of ship.
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like that very good. And then we have Renee
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: Gartner who's gonna keep us in line perfect. So that
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: starts next week. I can't wait to watch in the
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: corner in your cutchair. Yeah, beautiful. I have a little
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: update of three things good. Three things I would like
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: to talk to you about. One is just very quick
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: wondering how many hats you have lost at school so far?
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: None different with boys and girls, I think, Okay, go on, okay,
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: because girls have hair and you have to put it
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: into different sort of ponytail and stuff.
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: The hat doesn't sit right.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: No, I don't really do my han anymore. She just
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: wants it to be free. You know she haven't lost this.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: SAT's terrible for knits, dude. Oh man, the knits don't
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: care if it's in a ponytail or not. Then they're
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: going to attack. They have the knits won't go Oh,
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: hang on a second, that braider.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: No, no, it's all about the hair moving and touching
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: other people. Who was telling you this? It's science from
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: like what? Okay?
• 18:07
  Speaker 3: Well, just what report? I don't know if the top
• 18:10
  Speaker 3: of my head.
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: It's from sir head last we can figure it out,
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: but I'm pretty sure that's how it works. But anyway,
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: so like it sits quite snug on Oscar's head, right.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: But I know when I put a hat on Macy,
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: I turn around. It's like, where's that fucking hat gone?
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: Because it doesn't seem we've lost three we've lost three hat,
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: we've lost three. She's selling them, dude, you reckon?
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: She is well, and I'm like, can you go to
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: lost property in check? And she's like, where is that?
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, you have to ask your teacher, ask
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: your teacher where it is? Anyway, three hats and a
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: water bottle. I see, I see how that by secondhand uniforms.
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah, five bucks. Yeah, it knew is a fools game.
• 18:47
  Speaker 4: I know.
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: The hat thing is annoying because I have Oscar's come
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: home with two hats, Kai, come and pick your hat up. Actually,
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: Molly to come home with a beautiful metal water bottle.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: Well that's val you're yeah.
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: I was like, well that's that's that's like forty bucks.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: That's like thirty bucks.
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: Well yeah, I bought the kids water bottle, remember, and
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: they stitched me up. It was like seventy bucks a
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: water bottle from where Smiggle mat Camut came out. Give
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: them the microplastics, they're great. The beach ash Yes, I'm
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: familiar Sands water.
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: For those of you who made up be familiar, I
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: was I was away in the jungle for a while.
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: You were thirty days plus a week prior, so it was,
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: you know, almost forty days.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: You're going a long time.
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: So I've I've come back and my memory has completely
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: played tricks on me. I've well, I've just I've forgotten
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: how hard parenting is, and I've forgotten activities which make
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: parenting even harder. Beach is one of them beaches that
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: is a minefield.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: Oh that is like great, great to get out of
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: the house, great to stack up a few hours, great
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: to tie the kids out. But let's be honest here,
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: the beach is an absolute fucking nightmare. It's look, it's
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: getting ready to go nightmare on the way nightmare, nightmare,
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: getting there, nightmare, parking parking nightmare, just so much gear,
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: getting out nightmare. Then the worst party is getting them
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: in the car full of sand.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: Ah And do you know what happened? Yes, BONDI very busy, right,
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: everyone is on top of It's just like one big
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: orgy on the beach there.
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: I'm listening.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: Just quickly.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: What I mean, It depends on how busy the beach is.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: But what do you think is the appropriate distance between towels.
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: Like strangers towels. Yeah, oh I think there are man
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: your arm.
• 20:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so like a meter and a half maybe.
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: Maybe two meter and then one more of people.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: They were they were like on each other.
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: I put my towel down and then the towel is
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: touching my towel and I don't want to be that
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: guy saying excuse me, but our towers are touching.
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah, like that's not allowed.
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: There's no I don't know.
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: There shouldn't be any toawl crossover.
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: No towel cross if you're crossing over someone else's.
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: Tower, unless the wind accidentally waft wafts it.
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: But even even if your towel is close enough to
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: be wafted by the wind over to your.
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: Towel, that's too close. Yeah, Like it's nightmare.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: So we're walking down and it's very hard to you know,
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: it's you're trying to like dodge all the people. Don't
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: have the buggy, no time for that. Got the I
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: got the big pram, big pram, load the big pram up,
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: big bag. Then like we have to track from the ramp,
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: drop the pram off, then trek across the beach, and
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: it's it's an arduous journey. You know you're dodging people.
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: And I said to one of my children, I don't
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: want to call them out, but I said to them,
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: just be really careful because they're you know, they're not
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: lifting their feet, they're just kicking the sound. Just be
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: really careful. We don't want to kick sound on people.
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: And then one of my children had that information, looked
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: at me, walked up to a woman who was some
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: baking and just kick sand right in her face.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: Do you know what that whoever made nameless would have
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: heard you say when you say don't kick sand or
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: they would have heard was Kicksand I was like, that's
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: all they would have heard. Just like just went up
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: went up to why. I don't know. I'm like, what
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: is fucking wrong with you?
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: Just went up to a woman just she was having
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: a great time relaxing on the beach and just got
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: an absolute footful of sand in her face.
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: And she's there going like what the hell? I know
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: which child this well?
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: And then I'm going, I'm so so sorry that was
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: That was not me, that was my wife.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: I should have doubled down and just give her a
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: big matty j flipper full of sand.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: I was like, I want to make peace here anyway
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: I know which child it was. And then and then
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: also reading between the lines, my children are a really
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: difficult age right now where they've just started to like waves.
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: Like before they were petrified of waves. Obviously small waves,
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: they quite like it. But as we're like waist deep
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: in the water, sometimes your odd rogue wave would come,
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: which set, yeah, like a bomb set, which is like
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: almost head height for my my children. As this bomb
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: set comes, I then, moments before impact, I then lift
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: the child up to save them, and that's met with
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: don't fucking touch me.
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, I just let him have it.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: So dude, after two bomb sets and being yelled at
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: by my daughters, I'm like, do you know what you
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: can you can cop this.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: Here's a life lesson.
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: And like this wave came, monster wave, like big bumming
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: out the back and we're only like, well again waist deep.
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: So it's whitewash at this point, and it comes in
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: and I'm like looking at looking at my daughter, looking
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: at this wave, looking at my daughter, and I'm like, well,
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: you're gonna get what you asked for. Praise for impact, God,
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: steam away, and then like feet are like tumbling in
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: the air. I then I went over and a skid them.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: But I pick them up out of the water and.
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: They're like, ah, why didn't you get me? Or it's
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: usually met me. I hate the bitch. I want to
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: go home. I'm like, what do you want? What is it?
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: I can't pick you up, I can't let you get
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: hit by a wave, Like, what do you want from me?
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: Also just going to say I love my kids, really,
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: I love them. It's like it's they don't know what
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: they want. You're trying to get them out of danger's way.
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: They don't know that that's danger until you've done the
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: right thing.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: So then I'm like, I want them to know that
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: the waves can waves are not your friend. Don't underestimate
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: the ocean, dude. Anyway, I came back and I was
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: just like that was well, they just like full of sands. Yeah,
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: they you know, they were hungry and they were you know. Anyway,
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: I did the same thing with Oscar, but on a
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: on a like a foamy surfboard. He was like, I
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: was pushing onto these tiny it was like I'm talking
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: the size of an iPhone wash just so that you
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: could get yeah, lovely, lovely and he was like, oh,
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: I want bigger I want a bigger one. I was like, okay, bro,
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: here you go and push him on one like double
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: the size and it just nosed dup flung him. The
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: guy took off the beach. He's just like, I'm like, where.
• 25:14
  Speaker 4: Are you running?
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: We live that way. Eventually you turn around and came
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: back and then had to go see mom, hate hate
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: the water, the surfboard. Then I just I continue, I know, yeah,
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: I continue to continue to do the same thing to Macie's.
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: But she isn't a big floating jacket. Well, when you're
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: shutting these kids across the beach, this isn't a big
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: floating jacket. So she just rolled on top of the water.
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I hate the beach now. I hate the beach.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: Hate the beach. And also to go back to your
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: point about how close the towers are right, yeah, going
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: we're just gone out of school holidays, which you know
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: is a terrible time to go.
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: To the beach.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: It's the time that you want to go and the
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: time that everyone else wants to go. So it's just chaos.
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: We're down the beach nowan beach and there's a big
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: rock wall and we sit up against the rock wall
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: that there's a lagoon that runs into the ocean and
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: then it goes in and out, in and out.
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: And it's like a bit rapidly. And then there's also.
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: Some deeper spots with the kids, but there's not a
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: lot of sand.
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: For anyone who's unfamiliar. Look at ashes stories on the
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: weekend and you'll see now being like, which is beautiful.
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: Oh, it's lovely when it's gorgeous when it's open. When
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: it's not open, it's like a big stinky puddle. But
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: it's probably like from me to the wall away, there's
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: a couple of meters in terms of sand. And where
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: I sat here in a spot, people sat, you know,
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: and this family with a tent came and sat within
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: ten centimeters of where my feet are, like a full tent,
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: so they're completely obstructed. Just move in, yeah, just move
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: to my fucking house wives. And they've obstructed the view
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: and then the tent that he even moved my towel
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: corner to put the tent.
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: Come on, bro, come on, like, who has the audacity
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: to move someone else's tower?
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? No? And I said, oh, good thing,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: we'll leave him.
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: What did he say? He just laughed, like giggled, like
• 27:12
  Speaker 3: he was like nervous.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: How do you where do you get that level of arrogance.
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: It's more like self awareness. Some people have zero self
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: awareness whatsoever. Like just have a scaup of it. You
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: may as well.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: You may as well just move into someone's house, like
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: knock on the door, come through with like eski and
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: have lunch in the backyard.
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: That generation, it's it's like my parents. They will make
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: my parents generation where my mom so I moved into
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: my father in law's house. I don't have told you
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: the story, and Mom goes, do you mind if we
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: park a caravan at the front? I was like, yeah, mum,
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: you want to park a fucking caravan? And I saw
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: at the front of my father in law's house. Have
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: some self awareness, like you have told me this story
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: four times? Yes, sorry, but like that's what I mean.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: It's that generation. I just you talking about the tower
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: and I really got me. I'm going to say on
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: the weekend, the culprit was my age. Oh yeah, it's
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: but it's it's all generations. It's an issue. It's an
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: issue that's been neglected. We have an election coming up.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying, well, there was that whole cool cabana
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: thing that went mental. I want to I want to
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: the hornet's nest. Taking a cool cobanna to the beach
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: is like taking a carport to the beach.
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: It's the same thing.
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I'm going to have to start doing
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: it because the towe is not strong.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: Enough a perimeter. Build a note.
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: No, people are disregarding that. Back in my day, the
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: towel was was the perimeter. Like people would look at
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: the towel as being like, that's your land. People disregard
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: the towel. Now no one gives any respect to the towel.
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: People only respect the cool cabana.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: You should roll over onto their towel, like, hey.
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: I started eating their snacks, bring those strawberries over here,
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: but their sun cream started kissing his wife and I
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: was like, yeah, is that.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: How do you feel? That's how I feel when your
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: towel approaches on my town.
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: It's the only way they'll learn. One of the things
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: happened as well. It's quite exciting. It's a big milestone,
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: big milestone in the Johnson Burn household. You no, Well,
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: it's exciting because where.
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: My child is evolving.
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: In the what she can fly shut up about time
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: she has this is Lola has stopped wearing nappies at nighttime. Oh,
• 29:30
  Speaker 2: stop wearing nappers at nighttime. We did a rule where
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: I think we said, if you can do five nights
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: of no wheeze, then dry nappy in the morning.
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And so every time we have a dry nappy
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: it was like whoo.
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: Like big celebration, big song and dance. She was really excited.
• 29:46
  Speaker 2: And then and also said a lot of money. Nappies
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: aren't cheap. Oh yeah, and it's a bloody nightmad terrible
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: for the environment. Not that that's stopped me using them.
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: Shout out to anyone who uses cloths no, because funck
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: that that's for that love the environment?
• 30:01
  Speaker 3: Though?
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: What about it is? When I had a kid, my
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: sister was like I was the first out of my
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: siblings to have a kid that she was like going
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: to use resalp and I'm like no, She's like, do
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: you know how bad they are to the environment?
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: The other one like the.
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: Ones you buy. And now she's got a niece and
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: I said, did you use reusal apps?
• 30:16
  Speaker 3: Like I want to talk about it, but.
• 30:18
  Speaker 2: Also like look at the mines that you know, they're
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: digging up Australia, Like, you know, it's over.
• 30:23
  Speaker 3: Fuck it.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: Whether I'm using a Huggy's nappy or not. We keep
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: trying to get to net zero. We're setting unachievable goals.
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: Let's go the other way. Don't put the pressure on
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: the parents, put the pressure on the mining company.
• 30:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, let's go the other way. Please met one hundred.
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: But yeah, we are. We decided this is going to
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: be it. No nappies at nighttime.
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: I'm loving that, which is like, you know, it's a
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: bit it's like my little my little girls growing up
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: now at every every turn, they're growing up.
• 30:50
  Speaker 3: But then like first night no nappies.
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: Pissed the bed.
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: But it worked out perfectly because she rolled off the
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: bed and then Pete, there's a little rugs she peed
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: on the run.
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, on the rug. So she was like, Daddy and
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: I went up there and she's like, I need to
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: get changed.
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: And I was like, this is a great result because
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: the time it takes to change the bed, they then
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: wake up even more.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: Everyone is pretty much awake.
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I was like, I'll just put a towel
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: down and drive that rug right up, beautiful, it's fine,
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: love that It's fine. But then Lola started doing this thing.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: Is she still heavy on the waters? She does?
• 31:28
  Speaker 3: Okay? Her sleep routine is a bit strange. Okay.
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: So she has a water bottle but has to have
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: it hot yep, Okay, Well, there's a certain temperature it
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: has to be not too hot to touch. She almost
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: has it as a comforter. So she wants a warm
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: water bottle when she sleeps, right, that's rule number one. Yeah, okay,
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: rule number two. This has only started happening since I've
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: been away. She doesn't have a pillow anymore. She's very
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: particular with her senses.
• 31:59
  Speaker 3: So there's three issues my wife would call them.
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So she doesn't have a pillow. She has like
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: one of those soft felt blankets which is folded up
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: in the shape of a pillow.
• 32:08
  Speaker 3: That's what she sleeps on. Right, it's rule number two.
• 32:12
  Speaker 3: That's weird.
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: So rule number one, just to reiterate hot water bottle,
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: which is a water bottle. Well number two, blanket, pillow.
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: Rule number three, she sleeps on her block of cement.
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: She can't use a duvet as.
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: Agree to disagree. That's another argument. So she now gets
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: going on this one.
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: Then now just has a a crocheted blanket. And when
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: she has the crocheted blanket like Nana's blanket, Nana's blanket.
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: When she has on her it has to be up
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: to her like her shoulder, Oh my god, and then
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: has to be completely flat like all the edges all around.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: It's a vampires. She sleeps on a side.
• 32:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: If there's any ripple in the blanket, she's like, there's
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: a ripple, yeah, and have to have to smooth out
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: the blanketed fuck. Kid's a weird.
• 33:03
  Speaker 3: Hey, yeah, that's that's my daughter.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: They are how they are weird. You can't well, that
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: is all weird. All of those things are all weird.
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: I don't know what you want to say.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: So that's how she sleeps now, And I'm like, do
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: I start to push back on these things?
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: No?
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: Do I just unless you want to lose some sleep,
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: do I just take the path of this resistance. Luckily
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: she'll if the blanket raffles up in the middle of
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: the night, she's fine, but going to sleep. She still
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: got the dummy, yeah, yes, and that's also everyone before
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: the dummy. Still we'll get next week. Get where the
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: dummy again. I remember what happened last night.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: But yeah, it's weird. They pick up these little bits
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: and pieces like they comfort things. Right, they all have
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: like oh, they doesn't really have that. She's just Lola
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: because I had I've busted Macie. Actually I busted. She's
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: been busted. So like all of our kids books, right,
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: because you read a book we before we go to.
• 33:58
  Speaker 3: Bed part of the bedtime routine. She just make this
• 34:00
  Speaker 3: episode about bedtime.
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: All about laying down and so, you know, read a book.
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: But she also likes to then take the book we've
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: read to bed. I have no problems with that, but
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: I had noticed over like a few months that every
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: book has bits.
• 34:15
  Speaker 3: Of it missing.
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: She rips out pages, he rips out the flaps, he
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: rips out I love full pages, just bits of something
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: like maybe you know when you're like a kid and
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: you're like, oh I love this from a magazine and
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: you keep it or whatever like sort of like that.
• 34:30
  Speaker 3: And I was like, but I couldn't. I couldn't find
• 34:33
  Speaker 3: the bits. She's eating them. That's what I thought. I
• 34:36
  Speaker 3: thought she's fucking eating the paper.
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: And I kept like just trying to catch us like eh,
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: but she'd just be like, anyway, she's got a bed
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: full of books and all the half the pages are missing,
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: and I was like, what's going on here? Anyway? She
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: she's still in a nappy and she leaked through the
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: nappy and it was quite a big one, so it
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: was like it went through multiple layers of sheets and whatever.
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: So I've moved the bed and little behold, I have
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: found the nest the nest and I want to show
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: you please because the video is quite funny. Love it
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: your hair? Now, come and show me what you've watched
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: rhy on your bed. She's grown up. Oh what's that?
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: From here to get Away? She's been sprung and she's
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: just like shit, I know, I know, just gaining this
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: real attitude. Yeah, she's grown up. She's like turning too,
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: Like she's so funny now. Anytimes she does anything instead
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: of like facing the music, she just goes so rude
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: and you can't get cranky with her because she just
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: says it's so cute. Where do they get that from?
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: Must be a daycad thing. So funny. Yeah, she'ld be
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: like she does this thing now and she's like, oh,
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: come on, man, she's wait years. You haven't seen her
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: in ages, waiting to see she's like a completely different
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: yeah child, Yeah, that's funny. She is very cute anyway,
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: So the books are all fucked in my house and
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: it's because of Mazy. But we've now we've stopped with like,
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: we're like, you can have one book, but as soon
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: as you RiPP a page books on, Matt.
• 36:29
  Speaker 3: I have some good news. What's that.
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: We have brought back a segment from last year called
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: Parenting Lies.
• 36:35
  Speaker 4: Play the music tell Me Love, Tell Me Love.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: Yes, that's a banger. It's been a while, it has
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: been a while, and exciting news off the back of
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: for those of you who maybe have not been following
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: us for a while. We did a kid's book last year.
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: We got some soft toys made. Oh yes, they came
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: very late from China.
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: The book is now pretty much like finished, but we've
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: got like one hundred and fifty.
• 37:08
  Speaker 3: It means we've got things to give away, Matt.
• 37:10
  Speaker 2: So if you have any parenting lies and they get
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: read out on this podcast, we will send you. You
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: have the choice of a Maddie j or an ash Doll.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: We will send it to you. So telling lies your
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: kids may reward them by giving them a sof toy,
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: and like.
• 37:25
  Speaker 3: The thing is with giving them one each, we're going
• 37:27
  Speaker 3: to figure out who's the most popular.
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, it's like we've got we've got a whole
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: box of ashes here. Yeah, we've got no Matt's Lola
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: loves ashy Bashi because he's got the red hat.
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: Loves the red win over every time.
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: Do you want to start it?
• 37:40
  Speaker 3: Would you let me to start?
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: Yes, I've got one here. This one is from Lauren.
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: Hi Lauren, She says, congratulations, she's got a soft toy.
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: Ah yeah, just like that. That's how it's done. That's
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: how it works.
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: When I was a kid, my dad told me that
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: our cat had run away.
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: Very sad.
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: That's horrible, and she goes, I only recently found out,
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: now that I'm in my thirties, that he accidentally ran
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: it over in the car. Oh so he'd been I lie,
• 38:13
  Speaker 2: that had lasted decades, Oh a bit.
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: The Dad's like, fuck, I thought I got away with that.
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: I used to have a bird and my nan was
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: looking after the bird while when we moved away, and
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: she said, oh so I died of like bird cancer.
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: I should have known when she said bird cancer, I
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: should have known that. I later on in life found
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: out that she hit it over the head with a brick.
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: Why because it was sick and I wanted to suffer anymore. Okay,
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: she's old school. She buried in the backyard.
• 38:42
  Speaker 3: It was yeah, okay, anyway.
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: Bird cancer, fuck it dumb was iron like brick cancer.
• 38:50
  Speaker 3: Thank you. Okay, you're like, thank god. She could have
• 38:56
  Speaker 3: body slammed it. Body slammed it. That body's learned the brick.
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: Onto itar funny, get get out a better joke. Body
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: slammed the bird. I would have taken pile driver. I
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: want to take an armbar.
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: When the bird was dead, she goes, yeah, she was
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: like doing the hand in front of the face. For
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: those of you who are listening, yes.
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: Not watching, I forget that. It's not the visual medium.
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: Okay. This one's from Anonymous, whose anonymous messages these days.
• 39:25
  Speaker 3: Anonymous says, strange name, birth name.
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: We have a toothless man living in our drain to
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: stop the girls playing with the shower. Why does he do?
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: They're gonna go with so many other things. They could
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: have been, like teeth. They're like, there's a man in
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: the train. They're like, so it's like who's It could
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: have been like he's he's he's horribly disfigured, or like
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: anything else. He's got one eye but terrible breath. My
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: husband told our kids, who's this from?
• 39:58
  Speaker 4: Oh?
• 39:58
  Speaker 3: Is this from Emma?
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: Oh?
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: Congratulations?
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: One day ash Dahl ash Pick Maddie j. She says,
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: my husband told our kids, who were two and four,
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: for those playing at home, that if they get out
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: of better bedtime, Roro, who was the robot vacuum cleaner,
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: would get them. So now when they go to bed,
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: they have to say good night to Roro and remain
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: in bed at all times.
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: Is part of the family.
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: I used to have an electric vacuum we called her
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: NeSSI because the place was messy and Nessie would come
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: and clean. It didn't work though she was stuck on
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: the couch all the time.
• 40:35
  Speaker 3: Useless.
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: This is from Sarah. She tells her kids that they
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: have to close the park at midday to clean it
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: for the afternoon visitors. Very good, classic, that's just a
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: well thought out lie. Mainly especially if you've got kids
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: like Macy still naps. She's was useless and it's like
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: trying to get them home, like they got to shut
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: the park.
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: We can come back after your nap for repairs.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: How good it be if you could just leave your
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: leave where everything you're playing with, go, have an apple,
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: come back and tall clean again.
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: That'd be great. The dream that is the dream. We
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: have one quick question Ash before we go. One quick
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: question and also for those of you who do have
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: any parenting questions, submit it, throw it our way, Ash,
• 41:17
  Speaker 2: and I will give you our unprofessional opinion on it.
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: This one is actually a personal question of mind, Ash,
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: that I will ask you off the back of some
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: recent activities.
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: When does it feel on it? When does it become
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: standard practice for birthday parties to be drop and go?
• 41:39
  Speaker 3: The food, you drop and go, you drop the.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: Kids off, drop the kids off, and you drop the
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: kids off obviously you get out of the car.
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: Its like dropping off for school.
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: You get out of the car, you hand them over
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: and give them the gift, and you come back in
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: two hours and the party's finished.
• 41:54
  Speaker 3: But don't have to be older.
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: We're there, were you're there, We're there at the point
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: where we're having we're now having drop and go birthday parties.
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: If if if April was like gonna have a birthday
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: Party's gonna be dropp and go. I'm like, no, I'm
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: not looking I'm not taking care of ten kids on
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: my own.
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: Well it's not you, it's but if it was me,
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't be honest. Let's be honest. You're not looking
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: after anybody.
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: I'm looking after me. Well, actually jurors out on that.
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: Dropping go so okay, So dropping with a present, yeah,
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: and off you go?
• 42:25
  Speaker 3: You the house or at both?
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: Dude, both we've had We've had two birthday parties where
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: it's been optional. It's been optional for you to stay
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: as a parent.
• 42:36
  Speaker 3: I did not know that was a thing.
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: I wasn't sure, Like what are the benchmarks, Like how
• 42:39
  Speaker 2: do people decide?
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: Is it like at six or seven? Is that when
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: parties become drop and go? What is the rule here?
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: I have no idea, Like I said, like, I mean,
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: I love it. It's great you drop a kid out.
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: I was some time off. I'll be like king for
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: an extra hour. I don't worry about it. It's like
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: it's nice a sleepover. It's not time and my dad,
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: my dad, this is a bush. It's like, I don't know,
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: I feel like you having to drop. No, you're not
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: had a single drop and go part that I am
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: aware of, right, I don't go to the parties.
• 43:12
  Speaker 3: April does the party thing.
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: It's a it's a lot of small talk, and I
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: suck at that. You're very good.
• 43:18
  Speaker 3: No, I'm rude. I'm not.
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: I'm vulgar. I'm just like, hey, how about that penis.
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: One thing's for sure, you're not laughing anyone else's jokes
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: at the party.
• 43:26
  Speaker 3: I don't make it a yeah I do.
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: I love for good jokes, all right, But like as
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: as I'm all for the being the dropper, but being
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: the being the host, I would be like, you're not
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: going anywhere if you drop your kids off to me
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: and be like, where the fun yoga again? Drag get
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: back in here. Power. If I'm in here, you're in
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: here too.
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: So you're like, you'll have like a sixteen seventeen year
• 43:56
  Speaker 2: old birthday party for usc I'm macy, and you'll be
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: like parents must stay revising their kids at all.
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: Time because we're going to have the most fun most
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: likely at that age.
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: But like, yeah, no, not for.
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: Me, okay, I reckon from the age of six.
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: I don't think drop and go parties should be considered
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: as long as I'm not hosting considered.
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I can agree with you.
• 44:18
  Speaker 3: Ash. We have to get out of here make good
• 44:21
  Speaker 3: time today.
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: We'll also just say that we we announced last week
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: the calendars. We donated three thy, five hundred and fourteen
• 44:27
  Speaker 2: dollars to rise up. We still do have some calendars left.
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: We have a few.
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: We also have other things left coming out.
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Also we're selling a lot of things at
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: the moment.
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: Everything must go at this table.
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: You like it on saying watching the videos on socials,
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: you can have it for yours two hundred bucks.
• 44:46
  Speaker 3: That's cheap.
• 44:47
  Speaker 2: We are currently wearing T shirts. Yours is white. I
• 44:50
  Speaker 2: might just move not required because people are listening right
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: now and can't see anything.
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: Oh but very considerate of you, Thank you, thank you.
• 44:58
  Speaker 3: I'm thinking about the people right so. Sorry.
• 45:03
  Speaker 2: They will become available to purchase. We don't know when
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: exactly we will, Okay, we want to say a week
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: when this comes out. The maximum time from when this
• 45:13
  Speaker 2: podcast comes out and the shirts will be on sale
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: will be a week. Let's say a maximum is a week,
• 45:18
  Speaker 2: hopefully fingers crossed less than that.
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: Less than that. Yeah, they're great, they're comfortable.
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: But just follow us on social media, and as soon
• 45:25
  Speaker 2: as they're available, we will let you know. We don't
• 45:28
  Speaker 2: have that many. We've got about fifty.
• 45:31
  Speaker 3: We have a price on them. We get about a hundred.
• 45:32
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: I'm like, there's only two of them. We've got four
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: thousand in a warehouse. We've got four thousand calendars, four thousand.
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: We've just got a warehouse with things that I wants
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: to buy. We've listen to this episode. We're given away toys,
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: we're given away calendars, and now we're trying to give
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: away a tea shirt.
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: We're about to buy fifty thousand person rugs as well.
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: You know, there's like bags of rags at Budding.
• 45:56
  Speaker 3: It's just all two notting dad shirt.
• 46:00
  Speaker 2: Of us on social media and they will be aable
• 46:02
  Speaker 2: very shortly.
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So if you've enjoyed this episode, please leave a review,
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: five stars, maybe some words, or you can join us
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: where Matt.
• 46:09
  Speaker 2: Two dotting Dads on Instagram, on TikTok, and there's a
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: Facebook group as well.
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: The Facebook group is It's all right, It's lit, and
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: thank you for everyone that does post in there and
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: get involved and all of the nice messages that I've
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: got over the last twenty four or forty eight hours.
• 46:25
  Speaker 3: How does that feel?
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: It feels pretty good. I feel like a hero.
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: That's usual.
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: You should it was, that's great. Thank you. If I
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: haven't gotten back to you, which is probably nine to
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: nine percent of the messages, it's.
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: Not sorry, you've got add it's because I'm lazy, I'm unmotivated.
• 46:43
  Speaker 3: Your diagnoes. Now you can use that as an excuse.
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: I don't like abusing an excuse, but I will to
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: the bitter end anyway, must go because I have Eightyhdwright
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: see like two.
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: Doting Dance podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: Australia and the connections to land, sea and community.
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: peoples today