Latest / The Christy-Faith Show / Ep. 128 - How to Stop Second-Guessing Your Homeschool Decisions

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Ep. 128 - How to Stop Second-Guessing Your Homeschool Decisions · The Christy-Faith Show

• 0:00
  Christy-Faith: Welcome to the show today, mama. This is a different type of show than we usually do. This is a rare episode where we are gonna be talking about Thrive Homeschool Community the entire time. I've got the Thrive mentors with me, and we are gonna go deep, and we are gonna go there because if you are curious about Thrive, maybe you've been on the wait list for a while and you're not sure, you know that we open a couple of times a year, my hope is that by the end of today's show, you will know whether or not Thrive is for you. And by the way, if it's not, that's great.
• 0:29
  But I do wanna say this is why we do a show like this every once in a while, and they are not very often. But almost every time when we talk to moms in Thrive and they comment about what kinda tipped them over the edge, what made them feel safe and comfortable to trust us enough to invite us alongside their homeschooling journey, it was either when they heard Thrive members come on my podcast or when Thrive mentors came on my podcast. And thanks to Brittany and Denise, we kinda all brainstormed this episode together because my producer, Brittany, was saying, hey, Christy, it'd be really great if you could get some Thrive members to come on. And I said, that would be awesome, but that's really hard to round up. But then I got to thinking, we have so many Thrive homeschool community testimonials.
• 1:14
  Moms all the time are direct messaging us or sending us emails or sharing with us on Zoom calls just what a transformation they have experienced in their own lives because they've joined Thrive Homeschool Community. So what we're gonna do is be experience driven with our discussion today. I'm gonna ask the mentors questions, but I'm also going to be reading out loud some member experiences that we can then talk about. And I've never done a show like this before, so this will be interesting. What do you guys think?
• 1:52
  Welcome. I'm so excited. Maybe we should have you guys introduce yourselves first. That might be a great place to start. Denise, why don't you begin?
• 2:02
  Denise: I'm Denise, and I am the resident retiree in Thrive Community. I am a homeschool mom of three adult kids. My youngest is 26. He's my son. I have a daughter who is 29 and a daughter who is 31.
• 2:16
  She has two children that she is also homeschooling. My kids are very successful and happy, well adjusted adults. And I am here in Thrive as the voice of the one who has gone before, who is looking back and saying, You're going to be okay. You're going to make it. We have what you need and we are here and we love sharing it with you and helping you move forward and plan your homeschool.
• 2:38
  I am also the survivor, along with my children, of a pretty, toxic husband and father. And so one of the roles I play in Thrive is also to be that encourager and, guide for other moms and kids who may find themselves in similar situations with toxic family members or people close to them.
• 2:59
  Christy-Faith: And you are an amazing mentor. And also Denise, one thing that I love and I know the moms love is your words of encouragement that you share on the live Zoom calls. And our live Zoom calls are called office hours. We'll share what those are a little bit later. But first, let's move to Julie.
• 3:16
  Will you introduce yourself please with the cute beach waves?
• 3:21
  Julie: I'm Julie, and I'm a mom of two boys that are right now 12 and 10 and we're entering our fifth year of homeschooling and I've been in Thrive since the very beginning and I've worked my way through it, through all of it and I know what it's meant to me and so I just enjoy sharing that with the moms that are coming in and just witnessing the transformation that they go through as they work their way through it and really dive into the community.
• 3:46
  Christy-Faith: Will you share your role in Thrive? Because you're part of something we've added in the last year that has been so wildly successful, mainly because of the work of you and Marni. Would you describe that?
• 3:58
  Julie: So in Thrive, one of the main ways that I'm seeing is when moms first come in, Marni and I lead the accelerator group where we walk the moms through one of our really important frameworks and really, really start their process and get to witness the process that they have of transformation. And then everything else I do in Thrive is just supporting the moms and helping them find all the things that they are looking for and where to find this and that and podcasts and master classes and all the different things that we have. I'm always available to to work in the background and help them find everything they need.
• 4:33
  Christy-Faith: Yes. She has a black belt in finding broken things. So she will text us and say, hey. This QR code in Thrive, which is 20 layers deep, isn't working anymore. So she makes sure that we are running a tight ship, which I absolutely love that attention to detail.
• 4:50
  Marnie, please share sweet Marnie.
• 4:54
  Marnie: I'm Marnie Love. I have, three sons that we have been homeschooling since the beginning. My oldest will be 22 next month and he is finishing up his last year of college. My, middle son is 19 and my youngest is 16, so we have two more years in our homeschool life. And then I will be retired, which I can't even believe it.
• 5:14
  I'm a former public school teacher and just love encouraging moms here in Thrive. With all things homeschooling and parenting, I'm also a certified parent coach through Connected Families. And so I support moms in Thrive in office hours, in the DMs, in the main feed, just with all things, all questions that they have. Questions about parenting, questions about homeschooling, curriculum, all the things. And so I just love being able to be here.
• 5:39
  Walking alongside these moms, Thrive is what I wish I'd had when I was starting out homeschooling. And so getting to be in this space now with these moms is just a gift.
• 5:49
  Christy-Faith: And you know, that's so interesting because, of course, I say that too because there was nothing that I needed. I had to build it. But you know, we've never had a conversation, the four of us, as to why. Why did we need something like Thrive? Marty, since you just mentioned it, why don't I start with you?
• 6:07
  Marnie: I mean, okay. So first of all, Christy, like you are a systems girl. And so things that I had to learn to put together for myself, like step by step, you've already done. And so like the systems part of homeschooling, just the nuts and bolts of schedules and curriculum, like all those things, I was researching as you guys have, I'm sure done many times in the middle of the night, right? Like researching curriculum and trying to just troubleshoot different things that are happening.
• 6:35
  And I didn't really have anyone to talk to about it. I mean, had my homeschool friends, but we were all in the same place. And so it wasn't like I had people that had gone before me that could really guide me or even just like, our day is not working and I'm not sure why. Here in Thrive, you can ask. You know, you can we get this all the time, Denise and I invite moms to share their schedules and share their challenges in the DMs, and then we can troubleshoot and tweak a few little things.
• 7:04
  And those are things that I kind of had to learn the hard way. Like I had to research myself and figure out, and I was always a little unsure because I didn't have those other voices that I could really count on to just reaffirm maybe what I was doing or help me tweak just a little bit what I was doing. And so I think that's what I wish I had had all those years ago. Because I think it would have given me the confidence that maybe I didn't have because I just wasn't
• 7:30
  Christy-Faith: Yeah. And I I felt like that too, that it was really the blind leading the blind in those early years, and I needed a third party. I still need this. You know, what's interesting is I'm creating a little private community for myself for non fiction to help me with my non fiction writing because it's something that I really wanna improve, not just the writing itself, but my process. And it's interesting because I'm seeing so many parallels between what I'm building for myself and what Thrive, you know, already is that exists, which is that that help with the nuts and bolts, but also those big ideas.
• 8:04
  And one thing though that I think that is unique that isn't always found in your in person community, maybe if it's, you know, with your kids and your the your your mom friends are also your kids' friends is how we've really created a safe place that we can be this kind of try to be this objective third party that can look at your schedule or look at your curriculum choices. Hey. This is my curriculum plan. What do you think? And we're able to say, oh, you know, this is really heavy on the on the mom work here.
• 8:33
  Let's make some adjustments. And that's the type of thing that that we do in Thrive. A lot of women are surprised, and maybe Julie, you can mention this, they're surprised that you can direct message in Thrive, and they're surprised at how personalized the help is. We'll get to that in just a second because I don't wanna forget the the first question is why. Let's move to Julie.
• 8:53
  Julie, why well, you had Thrive when you first started. So what's your perspective on this? Because Marni, Denise, and I, we were, you know, kinda flying solo. What's your perspective when we share that?
• 9:04
  Julie: Well, that's just it. I think I came along at such a different time than the rest of you. I had the advantage of or maybe disadvantage of the amount of information that exists out there. So there was so much information, it was for me a difficult thing of sifting through what was good and what was bad. And so when I found Thrive and and got inside, I felt at a gut level.
• 9:30
  My discernment told me I was getting good information, and that immediately was a comforting thought and let me know I could dive in, I could let my guard down, that I was getting, it was a safe place, I was getting good information, everybody's intention and heart was in the right place with what was being created. And so it just let me really take in everything that was there and really, I feel like I got in so early on something so true and and good with information that it's it like, I had a foundation that, you know, from so early on in my homeschool that benefited my boys so much and just we did not have a lot of those sleepless nights because of that, because of getting in so early.
• 10:16
  Christy-Faith: Yeah. Something that you mentioned was you have so much information at your fingertips. And I think that's one of the reasons why women are drawn to Thrive because there are so many pseudo experts on the internet. Someone is saying something all the time. Everyone is selling something too.
• 10:31
  And I think that finding a place where your values are aligned is so important. Let's talk about those values for a second because and maybe Denise, you can share too. First, share your why. You know, you were homeschooling in an era where there weren't a lot of resources. Now we're in an era where there are too many.
• 10:53
  So when you were hearing us share, what were your thoughts on that first, that so that first question of the why, and then maybe you can also speak on all that noise.
• 11:02
  Denise: Well I was actually homeschooled myself pretty much through eighth grade before homeschooling was legal in America, and so I had that experience and a mom that was pro homeschooling which was very helpful. My sister was also homeschooling and we felt like two little beacons out in the ocean, but we encouraged each other that way. But we were always saying there needs to be someone to come along and really be this guide for homeschool moms and create an atmosphere and the things that we were discussing was Thrive, but we didn't know it and we didn't structure it in our minds. When I'm in Thrive Now when my heart says, This is what I always needed, what I needed was what Marni said and what Julie said. That place where trusted experts are saying, This is enough.
• 12:00
  You're doing enough. The curriculum is not your master. Who your child is is the most important thing. Like those encouragements helping us meld home and school so that we actually have a homeschool. And saying to me in those moments where I was just so overwhelmed, It's okay to take a break.
• 12:23
  It's okay to pivot and shift your focus. And I would do those things, but I needed someone to tell me that it was okay. Because when I was pivoting and I was taking breaks I would often feel guilty about it, and I needed someone to say, That's normal and that's healthy and that's what you should be doing. So one thing that I love about Thrive is we have vetted curriculums, so many of them that moms can trust, but we also have just really relational walk alongside you and encourage you, catch your tears, laugh with you, and just be your big sister in this journey, and that's what I really wish I had had more of. I always found myself being the one that was trying to encourage and lead my fellow homeschool moms, and I was always thinking, Listen, I'm just like you, right?
• 13:16
  Like we're all trying to do this and, it's a little bit Lord of the Flies, but it would have been really nice to have Thrive back then and I'm just grateful that Thrive is here now and that I get be a part of it, and I get to offer to the moms in Thrive what I wish had been there for me.
• 13:35
  Christy-Faith: I love that. And what you ladies are saying echoes something Monica shared, so we'll do our first quote here. There were so many quotes, you guys. Yesterday, I was having my Venti iced Americano in Starbucks. Do not judge my caffeine intake.
• 13:51
  Okay? And I was looking at all these quotes, and I'm just like, how do I even pick one? And so I kinda was going by theme. But what you guys were just talking about is what Monica echoed, and yes, I need my glasses here. Okay.
• 14:03
  She said, I clicked on Facebook thinking Thrive was one thing and this group is so much more. I am super discouraged often. Then I get on Thrive and listen or read, and I'm like, Yes, I can do this. Have you heard that sentiment from other moms? One of you can just chime in.
• 14:22
  Marnie: Yeah, I think, you know, the confidence that Julie and I get to see grow in these moms, after they come in, they're maybe feeling a little bit anxious, right? They're, How does this all work? What's going on? But then we kind of get them settled in with that accelerator group and they start to just settle. Like we can see it in the first meeting, everyone's a little bit anxious.
• 14:45
  And then as we move on by the sixth time that we're meeting, sixth week, you should see that confidence growing in them. And we have both just marveled at that progression that we see because they have time to really sit in this community. And it's not noise. Like in Facebook groups, might have, I mean, I have had some crazy experiences in Facebook groups. And you just don't have that in Thrive.
• 15:14
  Everyone is kind of moving in the same direction. We tend to attract what we call growth mindset people. And so we just tend to have this continuity. And I think this process that we help moms work through step by step, little by little, and that's why the confidence grows. Because it's just not all this noise and different voices coming in telling you different things, which happens in the Facebook groups a lot.
• 15:44
  This is kind of just very cohesive and I think that's what really helps moms grow in confidence. Also you have someone to walk alongside you. You're not just kind of floundering on your And
• 15:56
  Christy-Faith: someone who's ahead of you in the journey. You know, you basically encapsulated another quote here from Maddie. She said, I love having a group to go through all the steps with just for support and all the great ideas from everyone. So I think we need to define a little bit what she's referring to as steps because Thrive Homeschool Community is a couple of things. We are a training community, but we are also a community community as well.
• 16:27
  And so maybe, Julie, you'd be a great person to speak on this because you helped lead that accelerator group. This is a new thing that we've added in the last year. Almost instantly when we added it, the entire team was like, this is what Thrive needed the entire time. And, you know, interestingly, this is why Thrive closes also is because and we open and we have a new batch of students that we walk through steps. If people are wondering why does Christy's group open and close, This is why.
• 16:59
  So Julie, would you explain a little bit what the experience is or maybe define the accelerator group and what it feels like to be in that?
• 17:08
  Julie: So the accelerator group is the group of new moms that have come in, and Marty and I meet with them weekly to walk through the steps of one of the frameworks within Thrive that Christy has created. And I think the best thing about the Accelerator Group is that if a mom comes into Thrive and she's just a little feeling disjointed and not knowing where to go, this immediately gives her direction and it gives her an amazing place to start. And some of the first things we do are some of the most, like, meta level thinking in creating your homeschool, and it immediately puts her into a different headspace. So she immediately from the start is working with a group and she's really getting her feet on a solid foundation. And right from that first couple of weeks, she's realizing, wow, this is a totally different mindset that I thought that I need to have.
• 18:08
  She was she was coming into homeschool maybe not knowing anything about it, worrying immediately about logistics, and she was immediately just able to work through these first couple weeks and just take a deep breath and say, okay, those things will come and they have their place, but there's a lot more that I am thinking about now that's on a much deeper level than I was thinking before. And she's also working with coming in with these same group of women every week, so she's becoming familiar, she's seeing familiar faces. So she's coming in, she's got her thinking now sort of going in the right direction, that's a very, like Varney was saying, it's very calming. You see an ease come about the moms. And then she's and then she's feeling familiar, and she's feeling like she's recognized, and she's recognizing people.
• 19:03
  So there's she's building her community at the same time.
• 19:07
  Christy-Faith: Yes. And what we're referring to our live Zoom calls, it's so funny. We were on office hours this past week, and there was a moment where we felt like matchmakers. Do you remember that, Denise? Yes.
• 19:18
  Where there was that one mom with rambunctious boys and then another mom on the Zoom call was like, I have rambunctious boys too. And then we saw in the chat that they were kinda going back and forth, and I said, oh my goodness. A new friendship has formed. And I know that that has happened for me, all of you guys. Julie, I know you have made some really great friends just by being in Thrive, and I think that's great.
• 19:43
  And camaraderie that women feel is unmatched. I think that people assume that because we're nationwide and we are online that somehow there isn't connection. And that is something when I was creating Thrive, I fought for. I kept asking myself, how do these women feel belonging? Yes.
• 20:04
  I wanna train them, but how do they feel not alone in building this beautiful life that is still customized? None of these lives are supposed to even look like each other's, right? We're not supposed to be using the same curriculum. We don't all have the same values. But how can we feel not alone and feel belonging?
• 20:22
  And I think that the core idea there is what do our children need? What do our children need? Because I think it really flows from that. A lot of people don't realize that at least our view of homeschooling, which I think is very new and different in this space, and I'm proud of this, is this child advocacy aspect of Thrive. We are always looking at developmentally, what do children need?
• 20:48
  Academically, what do they need? Emotionally, what do they need? What does mom need? Ideologically, what does mom need as her north star? Because we know that smooth days, happy families, joyful learning flows out of that foundation.
• 21:05
  And so, I think that's just absolutely beautiful. Marni, you're nodding. Did you have a thought there? Okay.
• 21:10
  Marnie: I just, I love that so much. It comes across in so many ways in Thrive, right? I was just thinking, what do the moms get in Thrive? When Julie was talking about the Accelerator Group, it's like people don't think of homeschooling as a profession, but it is. We're homeschooling moms.
• 21:26
  This is that professional development I received when I was in the education system, right? And so the master classes, when you were talking about advocacy, it just reminded me that we have so many experts that you vet very carefully and bring into Thrive that help us learn more about our kids. And so it's part of that advocacy that I love of, yeah, we can be students of our kids. And in order to be students of our kids, we need to be doing a lot of learning. And so that happens in the special needs office hours.
• 21:58
  I see so many moms have these like a light bulb moments of, Oh, that's what's going on under the surface with my kiddo, right? Or in a master class where you bring in a guest where moms are just learning and growing. Mean, notes that Denise and I see these moms take during those master classes is just, you know, they're learning. Like Thrive is a place of professional development for homeschool moms. You are a professional and this is that space where you can get more training and you can learn not just the nuts and bolts, which is amazing, but learn about your kids.
• 22:33
  And that's that advocacy that you talk about.
• 22:36
  Christy-Faith: Okay. So before we move on to the next thing, if you're new here and you're already a fan of the show, one of the things that helps our show reach far and wide is your engagement. And what I mean by that is liking, subscribing, sending to friends. What it does is it tells those little robots behind the screen that this show is worth listening to. And then the show gets pushed out and it reaches homeschooling moms everywhere or maybe homeschool curious moms that are scared to start.
• 23:03
  So if you haven't already, please engage in some way. We thank you so much for that. It's just a small thing that you can do in the fifteen seconds that it's taking me to talk right now, but it is not small to us. We appreciate it so much. We are incredibly thankful.
• 23:16
  So please go ahead and do that right now while you're listening. So, Denise, maybe explain what master classes are because we have these two kind of training frameworks that when women come in, we put them through them. They are video lessons. They're they're printing out some worksheets. What are the master classes?
• 23:33
  And then I'm gonna ask for you to answer two questions. I think that some women when they think of this being a training community, they worry about homework. Wait a minute. How much work is this gonna be? So would you describe what this training kind of looks like?
• 23:48
  Because we're homeschool moms ourselves. We know. We do not need more things to do. So would you speak on that?
• 23:54
  Denise: Sure. You know, was thinking about this last night. Thrive is homeschooling moms. We are homeschooling homeschool moms. We are
• 24:04
  Christy-Faith: teaching Oh my goodness. I've never thought of it that way.
• 24:07
  Denise: It just hit me last night and I'm like, That's what we're doing. We are homeschooling love that. Because we are giving you the freedom to do what you really want to do deep in your heart, and that is learn what you care about. It's interest led learning. That's how Thrive is set up.
• 24:25
  And you can choose what do I want to learn about right now. Do I want it to listen to this recorded master class? Do I want to attend to this office hours? Nothing's required. We teach to mastery, right?
• 24:37
  We have moms coming into the DMs and we will go back and forth and back and forth and back and forth until she's at mastery. She's got it. She's got it to the extent that she wants it. We stay on that subject as long as we need to. We don't grade you.
• 24:51
  We don't keep attendance. We're homeschooling you in homeschooling. And the master classes that, Marni was mentioning, the experts that come in once a month, it's a live Zoom with, for example, Doctor. Joe O'Toole came. He's a neurologist and he spoke to us about the brain and learning and how your brain affects who you become as a person and incredible information.
• 25:17
  The level of expertise that comes in in these master classes is so equipping and so affirming and really enjoyable. So it's like a forty five minute class on Zoom. We're all quiet while the teacher's teaching, a PowerPoint for visuals, we're taking notes, and after the class there's upwards of thirty minutes of question and answer time where we can interact directly with that expert. Moms interact directly with that expert and get her questions answered, and we have one of those every month, and it's a new expert coming in every month.
• 25:53
  Christy-Faith: All of these master classes are put in a master class library. Yes. And I know that when you guys are answering direct messages, you are continually telling women when they ask you a question, you're saying, Oh, there's a masterclass on this. Right, Marni?
• 26:09
  Marnie: Oh my goodness. It's so helpful. We can if a mom is struggling with something, I just pop that masterclass right in the DM and say, Check this out, come back, and let's talk about it. And it's just so helpful for that continuing education. That's also, it makes the masterclass library a little less overwhelming because we can point you to masterclasses that would be helpful, or you can peruse them and say what you're struggling with right now and just watch that one.
• 26:33
  It's not required that you watch all of them. They're there for your, you know, for whatever you need at that moment.
• 26:39
  Denise: Right. Don't be deceived by the word class. You don't come in with any requirement as a student. You're just there to receive and take the notes that you want to take, the takeaways that you want, and the fact that they are in a library is so valuable because we have moms that watch some of them repeatedly. Homeschooling for kids means I'm juggling roughly 24 different subjects at any given time.
• 27:01
  And a few years back during a particularly busy season, I hit a wall. I needed some serious help with the heavy lifting of teaching everything myself and managing schedules for four kids. That's when
• 27:11
  Christy-Faith: I found BJU Press Homeschool, and we've loved their courses so much that we keep going back. Some families use them for everything and love it. I use them for certain subjects. Either way, total mental load relief. Here's what my mornings look like now.
• 27:25
  Let us take science for example. My three girls do that one together. They fire up the lesson taught by a real teacher, well produced, actual teaching, not just click through busy work. And I sit there with my coffee, watch them, or make breakfast, and we discuss the big ideas. Every BJU Press homeschool course prioritizes critical thinking, a biblical worldview, and hands on learning.
• 27:45
  I just guide the conversation and pick which activity or pages or projects we want to do, and everything's already planned out. They have an online platform included for you called the Homeschool Hub, and it keeps everyone on track, both me and my kids, without micromanaging or nagging. And when I have questions, I call my HomeWorks consultant. These people don't just help you get set up. They're available for you whenever you need them.
• 28:06
  It's like having a homeschool expert on speed dial. Go to bjupresshomeschool.com or click the link in the show notes to find out more. I wanna talk about homeschool math for a minute, specifically CTC math, who I'm so glad is sponsoring this episode because you need to know about them. I'm picky about curriculum, and there are a few subjects I won't compromise on, and math is on the top of that list. CTC math is what I use with all four of my kids, and it's an excellent k to 12 math program.
• 28:36
  Rigorous, thorough, comprehensive, everything I want my kids to have in their math education. But without all the stress, the tears, and me having to learn long division all over again. Here's what happens at our house now. My kids log in. A real math teacher walks them through the lesson four to nine minutes clear step by step.
• 28:56
  They do their lesson and finish up with practice problems. The program grades them, and I don't have to remember how to do fractions with unlike denominators or where exactly they left off last week, which means I get to be the mom in the room. I can sit nearby, listen in, encourage, fold the laundry, and watch math get done beautifully. Easier on mom? No sacrifice on academics?
• 29:19
  Yes, please. Join me and tens of thousands of homeschool families using CTC math for their go to math curriculum. Links in the show notes. Grab your free trial today, and you'll see why we love it for our kids. Which that actually brings me to the next quote that I wanted to read.
• 29:37
  And this is about it kind of goes into this, how does Thrive help moms in every age and stage of their homeschool. So I'm going to read you Natalie's quote here. She said, when I first joined Thrive, I was sad that our sweet elementary years were coming to an end. I felt overwhelmed and intimidated by the middle school and high school years ahead. This year, the Lord used Thrive to breathe new life and a fresh vision into our family and homeschooling journey.
• 30:05
  Now I'm genuinely excited about this next season with my boys. So a lot of people think when they are very new to homeschooling that once they get set up and their curriculum is picked, that's what they're gonna do for the
• 30:19
  Julie: next twelve
• 30:20
  Christy-Faith: years. Yeah. And and what is beautiful about this homeschooling life is and it's what we want out of this homeschooling life is that we are building something customized. And our kids' needs, all of their needs, their academic, emotional, social, all of it changes as they mature and grow as we are growing ourselves because a lot of the moms, we are all on our own healing and growth journeys. As we grow, our desires change.
• 30:50
  So that is why in Thrive, we always make sure that we have master classes that cover a wide variety of topics from preschool all the way to figuring out your high school's transcripts. And also it's why we separate the office hours into different times. So once a month we have office hours just for homeschooling littles. That's preschool through second grade. And then we have another office hours per month that's homeschooling elementary.
• 31:18
  That was this past week that was so fun. We were talking so much about parenting that Marnie's DMs were just full of parenting questions. We we actually we said on that Zoom call, we're like, Marnie's gonna be so upset that she missed this call. We also have a Zoom dedicated entirely to homeschooling your kiddo who has special needs. And we have one for homeschooling teens, and then we also have one for more veteran moms.
• 31:44
  Those of us who've been homeschooling a pretty long time, we're tired. Because here's the thing is I believe homeschooling in the later years, that's when a lot of people quit. They're like, we homeschooled in elementary, junior high, the subject matter's too hard. Eek. I'm not gonna do this.
• 31:59
  Or things get hard when puberty happens, and it just feels hard. But I believe these are such important years to be homeschooling. It's just that moms don't have the support, the support to do it, the knowledge, the curriculum options, and all of that. So, Marni, would you take a moment just reflecting on Natalie's quote about she was not a new homeschooler who joined Thrive. She needed Thrive for this new age and stage, and you are in that.
• 32:25
  I have elementary, two in junior high and one in high school. Would you speak to that?
• 32:30
  Marnie: Yeah, I think what I love about office hours too, is that the connection happens right in those times. And so while we're doing office hours, we always have our chat go in. Think Christy call it the bubbly chat, which it totally is. And moms are connecting in there. And so you get to see there's so much power that happens when moms come together and you figure out, Oh, I'm not the only one dealing with a motivational issue with my kiddo, or I'm not the only one dealing with a little pushback in this area.
• 33:01
  That right there is just like a breath of fresh air because then you realize, Oh, this is just an age and stage thing. This isn't a failure on my part, right? Like I can get some tools here and coach some skills and be coached in some skills to help come alongside my kiddo. So I think that's the one thing that I really love about office hours is just that connection that's made. We also have that happening in the main feed of Thrive two, where some posts are directly geared toward moms of teens, geared toward moms of elementary.
• 33:33
  Way that they can make connections to like, they love when they, when we put out those, like, what's your family reading this month? Then they can find books that meet that stage. I think mama just put in the chat, I got this 13 year old boy. He really loves series books. Give me some of your favorite adventure series for 13 year old boys.
• 33:52
  Kinds of things are happening in Thrive all the time. And that's just so helpful as you're moving into this next stage, like you're leaving behind maybe what you got comfortable with and what you knew, and you're entering into this new territory and you get to find out what other moms are doing and how they're handling these things. And I think that's really powerful. And then of course Denise and I are always happy to kind of go deeper with you in the DMs. Sometimes we'll see that, we'll see a chat happening or we'll see a mom mention something in office hours or even a mom tear up in office hours and we'll follow-up with her in the DMs and kind of go a little bit deeper with that stage of development because between Denise and I we've covered most of the ages and stages and so it's just helpful, I think, for moms that are entering into a new season of life or new baby.
• 34:42
  That happens a lot too in Thrive where moms are entering into, Oh, we're adding to our family. What does this look like? And they can even reach out to other moms and say, How did you handle XYZ? And I think that's really powerful.
• 34:55
  Christy-Faith: Okay, so a mom listening could think to herself though, Okay, yeah, office hours are great, master classes are great, but that forum, I could get on a Facebook forum. What would you say to that?
• 35:05
  Marnie: I mean, like I said before, Facebook forums are so different than what's happening in Thrive. Thrive is such a safe space to be able to share and we tend to attract like minded moms. And I think that's also a huge difference that's happening in Thrive. So you're talking to moms that you're getting to know in the feed, in the office hours, in different spaces, and there's that trust that happens when you're seeing these same moms over and over again too that I think builds community.
• 35:35
  Christy-Faith: Yeah. And you're not you're not anonymous. So there's some accountability to what you're saying. Every single person is paying to be in there, meaning they are at a different level of wanting to be good at their job.
• 35:49
  Denise: I was just going to add that Thrive is a guided community. There's guidance in Thrive.
• 35:54
  Marnie: Right.
• 35:55
  Denise: And I wouldn't use a word as strong as monitor but something similar. We're paying in the chats, like Marni just said, and when we encounter a mom that does need some mentoring and some higher level guidance, we zero in on that and provide that. But that's the culture of Thrive. And how many times do we see in the chat another mom saying, This is something you should reach out to Denise and Marni about? It's a culture of multi level and mentoring.
• 36:30
  You have spent a lot of time teaching Marnie and I a lot about how you want Thrive Run, but also equipping us with the things that you know we need to have as mentors. And so we're not just moms who've been there. We know what it is to be alone. We know how to meet you at your point of fear, your point of confusion, your point of doubt, and just lead you forward with literal love because we love doing this. But we're also equipped ourselves to do this kind of advising and that's something that you don't usually find in a Facebook group.
• 37:08
  It's not just a bunch of moms with opinions because the culture in Thrive, well they're being homeschooled. And so the culture in Thrive is we are in a learning process. We are not in a telling process.
• 37:21
  Christy-Faith: Yes. Yeah. And you mentioned the monitoring part. It's not like we're not like a big brother community. But what we do take very seriously is if we notice there's a chat going on where moms are discussing, trying to decide between two different curriculum options and one of them is actually damaging to children.
• 37:38
  Like, can think of literacy, for example. There are programs that we really don't want anyone using. That's where we won't say anything publicly, but we'll like, maybe reach out in a DM and say, hey. I noticed your reading thread. Let's talk about it.
• 37:52
  Or I wanna make sure that you feel really comfortable about like, that's how we do it. We reach out. But, Julie, what were you gonna share?
• 37:58
  Julie: Yeah. I was just gonna say, I think there's something inherently different about a mom that's making an investment into growing and improving herself and a casual Facebook user. So I think those are coming from two completely different mindsets popping in and popping out versus really coming here to grow and taking in and learning and growing in that way. And then I also think that, you know, the guidelines that we have in Thrive that hold it to a standard are similar to us laying out expectations for our kids, and that's just how it is. You just feel that the bar is set high.
• 38:37
  And so I think that keeps the tone in Thrive just on a certain level that just exists. There's nothing that feels forced about that. It's just the tone that exists. It's just so respectful and supportive, and I just don't think that those things exist in a place where you can be more anonymous.
• 38:58
  Christy-Faith: Well, and that leads exactly to what Joel said. So I'll go right into this next quote. That was like the perfect caveat, Julie. Joel said, I've avoided many mistakes I was headed towards and was redirected by this program, thankfully saving money, time, and frustration. In a Facebook forum, you're just getting all these competing ideas and this worked for me, this worked for me, and everyone thinks they're an expert.
• 39:22
  And I think that a thought that keeps moms up at night is, am I missing something? And it's not just am I doing enough? It's also am I doing too much? And then the third question is, okay. Well, then here's what I'm doing.
• 39:37
  Are these the right things? Yeah. Right? And so how does Thrive address those fears? Because I think that that's really what a mom you know, not that I wanna go as far as to call Thrive an insurance policy because we're not your kid's parents, know, we can't do that.
• 39:55
  But it is a very reassuring one. What do you guys think about that?
• 39:59
  Julie: It just makes me think of those advising things you get that say, it's normal. It'll all work itself out. And that's kind of like being told to just calm down and relax. And I think if any of us have ever been told to calm down, you know it's just how exactly it's so calming to just be told Yeah. To calm And so I think that that the difference is the systems and the education that come in are exactly what you need to know.
• 40:31
  You you get a very higher order meta level of education, so you have the big picture of what your homeschool's gonna be all the way down to very granular logistical kind of planning. And so you really have the whole spectrum of what you need, and then you have the guidance in between for the questions that you have. So if you feel like there's somewhere where you're just lacking in your confidence, I know this is what I need to do but it still feels a little bit scary, that's the greatest place where then the mentors and all these ladies that have been before you can reach out and you guys can connect and really give you the guidance in those places. Yeah.
• 41:18
  Marnie: In fact, we just had a mama reach out to us recently and she'd been through the accelerator group, she'd been through the frameworks, she'd been coming to office hours and she'd done her homework. And that was the first thing I said to her when she kind of was, I'm a little anxious, Here's what I have. Do you mind looking at it? So she had, like, her schedule. She had her curriculum for both of her kids.
• 41:41
  And she's like, what do you think? Do you think this is, like, too parent heavy? Is this I'm trying to foster some independence. I'm trying to strike that balance. What do you think?
• 41:49
  And she you know, my first thing was like, you have done your homework. Like, you have been here. You've been I know. It was amazing. And there were a few little tweaks, you know, that Denise and I helped her make.
• 42:02
  But overall, like she had it down, she needed another set of eyes on it. And she was like so excited. She I I actually can I read Sure?
• 42:12
  Denise: Bit of what
• 42:13
  Christy-Faith: she said?
• 42:14
  Marnie: Because this was, I thought, oh, this is going to be really helpful for moms to hear. So she came in kind of excited about her plan, but a little bit nervous. And so we had helped her
• 42:25
  Denise: make a few tweaks. When Marni says we helped her make tweaks, a lot of times those tweaks are based on her own hesitancy with her plan, her own She already knows there's something not quite right. It's not usually us saying, Oh, you've done this wrong. We never say that, right? But it's based on her actual knowledge and we're giving her permission to say, Yeah, you're right.
• 42:51
  That is a change that you might want to make. And she's like, Okay, great. What do you recommend?
• 42:57
  Marnie: So this is how she kind of entered in with us. She's like, Thank you so much. I'm so excited to finally be here. I'm a new homeschooler. I've been wanting to homeschool for years now.
• 43:06
  My husband finally said, Yes. Thank you, Lord. I've literally been praying for this for years. There's so many reasons why I wanted to homeschool, but I wanted to join because I just fell in love with Christy's podcast book and fun short videos of encouragement. I feel like I was already learning so much from her and totally felt like I can absolutely do this.
• 43:28
  I wanted the sense of community that I believe Thrive will provide. I wanted mentorship and resources. I feel like everything I've already taken in in Thrive has put me in that space. And so I just was like, she's really been soaking it in. She had so much knowledge and still she just had that little question in her mind, you know?
• 43:50
  And so being able to just affirm the good work that she's already done and help her kind of, you know, make it more a little customized for her family and also affirm, yes, you've got a good balance here of independent work and also still being involved. That's something that we really want moms to also still be involved in the homeschool of their kiddos. So it was just really fun to have that dialogue and back and forth with her. And she was so grateful for just the way that she was able to customize her plans.
• 44:24
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• 44:56
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• 45:16
  One thing that I wanted to mention too is I think that and we haven't talked about this a lot and maybe I haven't thought about it enough, but we definitely attract moms who feel very overwhelmed because they are information gatherers. They know that they wanna do this, and they're just inundated, and they feel like they are in a tornado of information. And I think one thing that we do really well is the feeling of overwhelm is not having too much to do. It's not having the ability to know how to prioritize all of those things that you need to do and in what order. Because the mom knows enough to know there's a lot she doesn't know.
• 46:00
  Right? That's why we start with the finding your why workshop. You need that north star. That north star helps you make all of those further decisions. And isn't it isn't it true, Marni and Denise, in the direct messaging where a mom will join Thrive, you'll welcome her because we do welcome everybody personally, and she'll be like blah blah blah blah And then you'll be like, in the next week, in the next forty five minutes that you have, take the finding your why.
• 46:26
  How does the conversation then change? You're laughing, Denise.
• 46:31
  Denise: It is shocking. That finding your why, it is probably the most critical piece to your homeschooling plan because it is your North Star. And what happens then, not only is a mom identifying why she's doing what she's doing, why is she homeschooling her children? And it's a holistic question. It's not just about, you know, want my kids to get into Harvard and I'm going to make sure they do it.
• 46:55
  No, it's holistic and every single why statement that they have comes because they're so excited and they'll share them with us. This is my why. I finally sat down and fleshed it out and it's what they want for their kids emotionally, psychologically, physically, spiritually, academically because they're moms, right? They're creating a mom why, not a school why. So it just brings a sense of calm and direction and purpose that you really can't describe until you do it.
• 47:31
  And you can do it with anything. Any endeavor that you're setting out on, if you sit down and create your why, you'll see what we're talking about, and
• 47:41
  Marnie: it's
• 47:41
  Denise: just a beautiful place to start. It's brilliant and it's right and it's it's just really good.
• 47:47
  Christy-Faith: Heidi this brings me to Heidi's comment here about her experience in Thrive. She says, I love the confidence I feel, and yes, my husband and friends noticed my confidence that totally comes from Thrive. As I was looking at all the comments, that word confidence came up so very much. Where do you think the confidence is coming from?
• 48:12
  Marnie: I think it comes from a plan, right? Like whenever we're not feeling confident, I think it's because we don't have a plan or we maybe have too many plans, too many people speaking into that plan, right? And I think what Thrive provides is like this roadmap. This is how you go forward. Here's the first step.
• 48:31
  So it's not just a plan, but it's also guidance along. It's like we come alongside, we're your navigators, you know, we help you work through what you need to, and everybody comes in at a different place. And so, you know, it's not like this cookie cutter plan. Yes, we have our accelerator group, but even within that accelerator group, even though we're walking through the framework together, it's hitting people in different places, on how long they've been homeschooling, if they're brand new to homeschooling, how old their kids are, all those things. And that's why I think when you pair the accelerator group, the frameworks with the direct messaging and the office hours, that's what creates that individual plan for each person with guidance, with reassurance, with encouragement and support.
• 49:21
  And I don't know where else you can find that. You definitely can't find that in a Facebook group. I can
• 49:25
  Christy-Faith: attest to that. I'm sensing some trauma, Marni.
• 49:31
  Marnie: Yeah, I'm not on Facebook anymore.
• 49:34
  Julie: Let's
• 49:34
  Denise: You're
• 49:34
  Julie: put
• 49:34
  Denise: it that so right, Marni, because it's competence that breeds competence. And all these little bits and pieces that we're talking about is systematically building competence. And everything that we do in Thrive is voluntary. This accelerator group, it's an option. We strongly recommend it.
• 49:55
  We know how good it is for moms, but it's not required. And so every homeschool mom has the freedom and the right to build the homeschool plan that is right for her family. And as you were talking, was sitting here thinking, I don't recall of all the homeschool plans that moms come to us with in Thrive, like the mom you were talking about, this is what I've decided on for language arts and for math, I don't think we've ever seen two that are identical. Mm-mm. Two moms have said, These are all the subjects I'm doing and these are the curriculum companies that I'm using.
• 50:34
  It's so individualized because there's no perfect homeschool plan that we just deliver on a tray. We're we're helping you gain the competence so that you have the confidence to say, this is the plan that is right for my family.
• 50:54
  Christy-Faith: I just love that every plan is different. That is the point. Right? And for a mom to have confidence knowing her plan is different than everybody else's, but knowing that it's the right plan for her family I'm trying not to get emotional.
• 51:07
  Denise: That's the reality. So when these moms are in the community interacting with everybody, they're all coming with their own unique individual plan and no one is saying, why are you using that for English? You should.
• 51:21
  Christy-Faith: Correct.
• 51:22
  Denise: It's not even it's not in the conversation because they have they're they've leveled way up past that.
• 51:29
  Christy-Faith: Well, let's talk about that leveling up because okay. So let's go deep here. Moms, are you ready are you ready for us to go here? Okay. Because I I do wanna talk about I feel like I actually just wrote a piece of content this morning that it's a little bit snarky, but it's it's kind of along the lines of a lot of people criticize homeschooling like, oh, a mom who barely passed high school, how can she teach algebra too?
• 51:56
  And it's like those people who criticize homeschooling, they're they're playing checkers, and we're over here playing chess.
• 52:02
  Julie: Mhmm.
• 52:02
  Christy-Faith: Like, you're worried about the content and we're worried about how can I give my kids the skills so they can teach themselves anything that they could ever want to learn? And it really comes down to how you view what an education is. What is the purpose of an education? And unfortunately, because we live in the cesspool of public education, we live in it. It's kinda hard to know that the water's dirty, and it's hard to know what beliefs we hold that are false beliefs because we've lived in it so long.
• 52:38
  It's very hard to examine yourself. Right? And so this brings me to a quote that I just loved. This is from Sarah. And she wrote, I could feel that the way I was doing it wasn't right.
• 52:50
  So she's not a new homeschooler. She said, but I didn't know how or why. What I was doing wasn't serving her. I was doing school to her. And isn't that it?
• 53:02
  Isn't that the thing? Society thinks school is something that we do to kids and we put them through and then all of a sudden they have an education where we're like, wait a minute, stop. No. No. No.
• 53:13
  An education isn't content. An education is so much more. Don't don't short yourselves. And that's what I feel like is a lot of the education that we do in Thrive Homeschool Community is the moms come in and they're like, okay, just tell me what to do, tell me how to do this thing. And we go, okay, stop.
• 53:35
  As quickly as we can, we try to deschool you. That's kind of what we're talking about here is this deschooling process of pause. First of all and the reason why we have mom pause is because we don't wanna we could set we could help you set up a homeschool. Yeah. One that you're gonna quit in two years because you're burnt out and you hate it and your kid hates it and they hate learning.
• 53:55
  Right? We want to help you build a homeschool that is sustainable, that is joy filled, that is peaceful, that ignites a love for learning. And that is what this deschooling process is. And that epiphany that she had, oh my goodness, I realized I was doing school to her. And you know, that's kinda scary, isn't it?
• 54:16
  Julie, did you was that a big shift for you when you first joined Thrive?
• 54:21
  Julie: It was. I knew in my heart that school I remember because my kids were in public school, and I remember putting them in school, which broke my heart truly to do. And I should have known right then that homeschool was gonna be on my radar, and I still was blind to it. I remember thinking and telling my husband, I'm not worried about their grades. That does not bother me at all.
• 54:40
  I want to just have kids that are good humans on earth and us just fostering that in them. So I knew from the start that that was where my heart was with my kids, but having a framework for how I was gonna do that and how that was gonna look was what I didn't exactly know and where Thrive came in. And this quote from Sarah, I I totally remember this. I was, I think, in the room when this conversation was had. And, you know, we we talk about, like, how do you how does Thrive handle a mom who may feel like she's doing something wrong and she comes in?
• 55:17
  It's the most organic thing that exists. Because like you said, if a mom comes in and she's, you know, very worked up about, you know, what's going on in her homeschool, she knows it's not working, instantly she's met with, let's, you know, work through this framework. She's she's guided, you know, of how to start and where to get her head in the right space, like you were saying with that deschooling process. And then outside of that, I think Marni and Denise are so great at speaking to the mom's heart and intention, and so there's never a feeling of you never I don't think anyone would ever feel like they're having a finger pointed at them. You see this mom's heart and intention is so pure for her kid.
• 56:02
  She just doesn't have the tools and knowledge yet. So that's the immediate guidance is to get her head in the right space. And if she's here, she's here to learn. She likely knows what she's doing isn't working. So she's in a mindset to be receptive to learning.
• 56:20
  So that's another difference in Thrive from something that's anonymous. You are here with that open mind. And I think that that day, that conversation and being open was that mom knowing the worst thing what's the only thing worse than her doing the wrong thing for two years was her doing the wrong thing for two years and one day. And she was fully ready to take in the whatever she needed to do and was ready to make a change. So her heart was so ready for the change, and I think that's why she realized it that day and that conversation was so great.
• 56:59
  Christy-Faith: Right. And then rather than guilt and shame, this is an opportunity for transformation. These are conversations she can have with her daughter three years from now. Remember when we used to do this and we do you remember the big shift? Right?
• 57:13
  And so it could be the most beautiful growth story
• 57:17
  Julie: Mhmm.
• 57:18
  Christy-Faith: That they have in their homeschool life.
• 57:20
  Julie: That's why showing up in these office hours is so amazing because there could have been 10 moms sitting in that that Zoom meeting completely silent that heard also exactly what they needed to hear in that moment.
• 57:32
  Christy-Faith: And we hear that all of the time. That I just showed up today. I'm really exhausted, but I showed up and I don't have any questions. My brain is blank, but wow. I am so glad I came.
• 57:44
  Marni, you've been nodding and nodding. So I wanna hear what's swirling in that beautiful brain of yours.
• 57:50
  Marnie: Yeah. I love that so much what you just said. Like, mom we get that all the time. Moms come and like, I'm so glad I came to office hours today. I don't even know why I came.
• 57:58
  Something just told me to come and I'm so glad that I did. I think for me, it's just wonderful to see these moms that have been in Thrive for a while, maybe some that have been in from the beginning even. And the transformation that we see take place in these moms, not just in their homeschooling, but in their parenting, that's what lights me up. Because that's what homeschooling is. Right?
• 58:20
  A lot of times moms are coming in with this, I have this, like, homeschool problem. Like, I have this if I could just get the right curriculum or if I could just make this one tweak, then it will all work. But what they're really starting to understand is this is a parenting issue, right? Like if I can connect with my kid, if I can meet my child where they are, if maybe I can do some work on myself and get myself in a better spot to come alongside my kiddo when they're struggling, like then homeschool changes. So it's not just about homeschooling.
• 58:54
  We're talking about the whole We're family talking about the mom as a mom and how she's interacting with her child and the relationship. Sometimes, as homeschool moms, we're thinking we need to like change our hat, right? Like, Oh, I'm a teacher now and I'm mom now. Mm-mm. It's the same hat.
• 59:13
  It's the same hat that you're wearing. So how are you going to bring in, you know, with this, I'm doing school to my child. How are you going to switch that to doing school with your child? And that happens through connection. That happens through you enjoying what it is that you're doing too, right?
• 59:30
  Like we're also redeeming our education. I didn't get nature studies when I was in school. That wasn't something that we did. But I really got to do that with my boys. I got to do that alongside them.
• 59:43
  And that made this bond and these memories happen. And we just shifted our homeschool when I stopped trying to switch hats all the time and just settled into, this is our lifestyle. We do this together. And I think I just love seeing that shift happen for moms, especially, for maybe moms that came in, we hear this sometimes, right? Like I've got my homeschool room set up and I've got like the desks going, right?
• 1:00:10
  And then we start our accelerator group, Julie, and like, Oh, where do you do school? Oh, on my
• 1:00:15
  Christy-Faith: couch and at the dining room
• 1:00:16
  Marnie: table and outside on the trampoline. I'm like, oh, this is a lifestyle. This isn't like school to our kids. This is just how we live our life. And I just love seeing that transformation happen over time.
• 1:00:29
  Christy-Faith: Okay. I want to give each of you an opportunity to share a nugget of wisdom or something that you jotted down in your notes that you wanna make sure a mama hears today. We can start with Denise.
• 1:00:40
  Denise: Oh, so much I wanna share with you from my heart. But one thing that I was thinking of when Marni was talking is you know a transformed mom transforms her entire family and transformation is a lifelong process. And that's the goal of Thrive is to transform. And if I could just give you a nugget it's that your heart knows what your child needs. Your heart knows what you need, what your family needs, and what you want for your family.
• 1:01:11
  A big part of what we do in Thrive as your mentors is helping you learn to trust yourself, giving you permission to trust yourself. Because when you reach that place of letting yourself really believe that you've got what it takes, that you were given these children on purpose, you are the best mom for these children that's why they were sent to you and no one can homeschool them better than you can because no one has the heart that you have for those children. No one has the expectations that you have for those children, the dreams, the desires, the wants, no one has it more than you do.
• 1:01:53
  Julie: Mhmm.
• 1:01:53
  Denise: So trust your heart and and follow it in every decision that you make because your heart knows.
• 1:02:00
  Christy-Faith: To add to that too, you just sparked my imagination. Don't you think that when you truly understand the purpose of an education, you realize that those teachers are not qualified actually. They're not qualified to give our children what we desire for them in all of those capacities in terms of the cultivation of a human being. Society of using education as content, we view it as the cultivation of a human being. And so why would we ever question who is the best person to do this job?
• 1:02:36
  Of course. Of course, it's us. Mhmm. And it's done through relationship. Oh, beautiful.
• 1:02:42
  Okay. Let's move to Marni.
• 1:02:44
  Marnie: Yeah. I love that you just said that about relationship because that was for me. You know, oftentimes when moms are pulling their kids out of school, they're losing a whole community. Right? Like, they've kind of like, my mom used to tell me, don't put all your eggs in one basket.
• 1:02:56
  But that happens sometimes, right? Like our kids' friends are there, our friends are there, and it can be scary to just kind of feel like maybe you're on your own. Oftentimes we have moms in Thrive that have made a move and so they haven't found community yet, or they're struggling to find homeschool people that align with them. I think that Thrive can be that. It can be that community that you get to plug into.
• 1:03:21
  It can be friendly faces that you see in office hours or friendly people that you see in the main feed. And I just think that's life giving to a mom. And when a mama's cup is filled, she can spill over into her kids. And I just think it's so important for moms to have community that's safe. Our community is so safe for moms and the way that they encourage each other, I just love it so much.
• 1:03:49
  Denise and I see it all the time in the feed, in the chats, moms are encouraging one another. And I just think that that's a beautiful thing. And so I just want to invite moms that are maybe feeling a little lonely or feeling like they don't have people yet, know, that Thrive can be that for you. And so just, you know, it's such a welcoming warm space. And I think that's cultivated, you know, by the moms that definitely are attracted to Thrive, but also in the way that we build community.
• 1:04:24
  We have social events too, which are really fun. The huddles, which we haven't mentioned are another way that moms can interact. Julie runs those. And I just think it's not just, I mean it is amazing learning. Don't get me wrong, I love that about Thrive.
• 1:04:39
  But it's also social, it's also fun. We have fun polls that we get to talk about fun things and mom hacks and all different kinds of things in that way too. And so I just think it can be a really great space for a mama.
• 1:04:52
  Christy-Faith: Julie, what would you like to share?
• 1:04:55
  Julie: I all of this talk about all of the things at Thrive are, it just makes me think I pulled my kids from school, from that system, and some moms I know are coming in, their kids have never been in the system. But for so many of us that system is what we know, but we know it doesn't work and so we're left sort of thinking, okay, I know what I don't want to do, I'm just not exactly sure how to do what I do wanna do. And so it makes me think of like in the beginning of wanting to homeschool my kids, I'm standing at the edge of this really big body of water and I'm thinking, how am I gonna get to the other side? And so I start swimming. And, like, I'm making good strides, I'm doing good, but very quickly I realized I'm gonna need a boat.
• 1:05:41
  I'm gonna need more structure because I'm I'm starting to wear out here. And so joining Thrive was like, I had the plans and I was able to start building my boat. And then now I'm in a boat and I'm like, I'm so sure that I'm making it to the other side. I've got so much confidence. And that's when I feel like any other mom that has that same desire could come here and she can build her boat.
• 1:06:08
  Christy-Faith: You chose to opt out of the conventional school system because you looked at it and how it measured kids and said, nope. Not for my family. Did you know that a lot of us can and have done the same thing with traditional health insurance? I wanna tell you about a different way to take care of your family's health care needs, and it's a way that's been around for over a hundred years, and it's saving families like mine a ton of money per month. For my family alone, it's a thousand dollars a month we're saving.
• 1:06:35
  So huge thank you to podcast sponsor and my husband's company, Summit HealthShare. So if you're not familiar with health sharing, here's the short version. It's not insurance, but it can replace it. What it is is it's a community of people sharing medical costs. With Summit HealthShare, families on average save 40 to 60% on what they were paying for traditional health insurance, and they have a 98% customer satisfaction.
• 1:06:59
  You can see any doctor you want, even crunchy ones. Love that. Love me some crunchy doctors. And there are different plan options. Maybe you just need major medical.
• 1:07:08
  They have it. If you want something a little bit more like me in perimenopause and I need a lot of labs, I'm on a plan that gives me free labs, free prescriptions, and no co pays. Sorry to get personal, but it matters. And I know it sounds too good to be true, but it's not. It's actually how health insurance should work.
• 1:07:23
  So if you are on traditional health insurance, just do this one thing for me. Go to summithealthshare.com and do the savings calculator. It takes you, like, two minutes because it will tell you what you should be paying for what you need. And when the result pops up and you spit out your water, you're gonna be spraining your ankle running to the phone to find out more. And when you call, they will walk you through everything.
• 1:07:42
  Tell them you listen to the show because I've told them that you need to get the VIP treatment. Go to summithealthshare.com. A link is in the show notes. How would you like to know which businesses, doctors, and organizations in your area share your same homeschool values? What started out of necessity for my family, finding safe service providers and doctors has turned into something really A whole community of colleges, businesses, doctor's offices, reading specialists, you name it, all in one directory.
• 1:08:11
  It's The Christy-Faith List, a place where homeschool families can find and give business to the people who share their values. And it is free for homeschooling families to search. And if you're a business owner listening today and you love working with homeschooling families and wanna reach more of us, sign yourself up. We wanna know who you are. The Christy-Faith List.
• 1:08:30
  Support the people who support you. I'll put a link in the show notes so you can search the list right this second. Okay. Are you ready for your surprise question? And I feel like we owe it to those ladies who've made it this far in the episode, and it's kind of the elephant in the room.
• 1:08:45
  Thrive is a paid community. You have to pay to be in it. And I know that it has frustrated some people. Why can't you just do this for free? And and especially since this is your calling, which it is.
• 1:08:57
  It is absolutely my calling. This is it's my oxygen is helping women build a beautiful homeschool life. So I want you to share because it can't come from my words. It can't come from my mouth. Am I a snake oil salesman?
• 1:09:12
  Is Thrive just a bunch of hype? Why you know, it's actually underpriced. How do you feel about that? How should a mom think of paying for her professional development? I did not prep the mentors for this question.
• 1:09:27
  I wanted to surprise them and just to hear just their raw, thoughts. And it can't really come from me because it's my thing. So who wants to go first?
• 1:09:36
  Marnie: I will go first because I actually was just, talking to Denise about this not long ago. What you get in Thrive is high touch coaching. That's what it is. I know we talk about it being a community and it is a community, but it's also high touch coaching. You're getting coaching from Christy and the amazing frameworks that she's created.
• 1:09:56
  You're getting high touch coaching when you go through the accelerator group because those are live meetings. We answer questions after. You get high touch coaching in the DMs when you get to share, you know, your struggles and your schedule and your parenting challenges and all the things and get help with those. We do high touch coaching and office hours. Like this is, it's actually a really good bargain for what you're getting.
• 1:10:21
  I was just sharing that with Denise. Like we don't talk about it like that, but that is what it is. Like this is really valuable, not just for community, but also for that professional development piece.
• 1:10:37
  Christy-Faith: What are your thoughts on that Denise?
• 1:10:39
  Denise: You know we hear it all the time but it's really true. We value what we pay for and I believe Thrive is underpriced for what is offered. I will agree with you on that. I think it's a great deal, but one testimony to being in a paid community where you're getting all the things that Marni just described, all the things that you've heard about, is that look at Julie. She's been in Thrive for years.
• 1:11:04
  She just said she knows she's in her boat. She's got a well built boat and she has absolute confidence that she's going to make it to the other side and she stays. So ask yourself based on all the things that we've said here today, why does she stay? Because she's told you. But then take that into your own heart.
• 1:11:21
  Do I want someone to help me build my boat? Experts that continue to come in and further equip me. It's ongoing. It's dynamic. We're constantly building new things for you.
• 1:11:35
  Marni and I will encounter what I call expressed need with the moms either in office hours or in the DMs and we say to Christy, We're hearing a lot of moms that are dealing with this issue. And Christy says, boom, let me get an expert and have him in for a master class. Like it's, we're constantly responding to expressed need and the demeanor, what you see here today is exactly how we are in Grow. This is how we interact. We know who you are.
• 1:12:03
  We care about you. We care about your kids. I cry over you and your kids. I do. Sometimes it's tears of joy, sometimes I'm hurting with you, sometimes I'm discouraged with you, but we are really there for you.
• 1:12:16
  You are getting high level, not just expert advice, but you're getting high level connection to people who know what it feels like to be where you are, and we want nothing as much as we want for you to be where Julie is in a well built boat just jetting across the body of water to the other side. I don't think you can put a value on that. You can't put a value on relationship, and what you get in Thrive is relationship at so many different levels.
• 1:12:50
  Julie: Julie? I agree. I think that what exists within Thrive that holds so much value is the depth. There's at every level, there's so much depth. And I think when you have a community that would if you were comparing a paid community versus a free community, you would not get that because a free community would have a lot of riffraff.
• 1:13:15
  It would have a lot of noise. It would have a lot of chaos and clutter that that then would allow to be brought in. You have a group of people that are all invested, and I think that makes all of the difference. The depth, everyone that I think comes in, in the beginning, and Marni and I see it so much, and I think part of the easing and the relaxing that we see is people realizing that Thrive is exactly what's been described to them, but they've never been a part of something like that, so they couldn't imagine it until they're That in it is a truly safe space. We're showing up, and these moms are showing up real and raw and vulnerable, and that creates such a depth to the group outside of, you know, we've talked about all of the systems and all of the great information and the research data that's in here.
• 1:14:08
  But the the feeling that you get when you show up is is I think, like Denise said, is once your boat's built, it's why you would wanna keep being here. Because why would you build your boat and then just let it all, you know, go to the wind? At that point, you're using all of the skills that you've got, but the depth of being here keeps you here and it's worth so much.
• 1:14:35
  Marnie: Yeah. I think one thing that we've heard, Christy, too, in Thrive, I love what Julie just said, is that moms hear what it's like, and then they come in and they're like, oh, it's more. It's more than I thought. And it's hard it's it's hard because you've not experienced anything like that. So it's really hard to even kind of explain what it is.
• 1:14:54
  But when mom comes in, moms come in, they're always surprised. Oh, oh, I didn't know.
• 1:14:58
  Christy-Faith: Well, I always judge myself when they say that because I'm like, well clearly, I'm not explaining this well enough. I always blame myself with that. But you know, I think that what Thrive is and was much needed, I think it's the best thing to happen in homeschooling in the last decade, is we are bringing dignity and professionalism to a job that has dignity and professionalism. And we wouldn't enroll our kids in a private school and not expect to pay for that, you know? So the other thing too is just because I work a lot in the volunteer space is and, you know, clearly the people who are in Thrive are are paid.
• 1:15:37
  Right? I want people's best. I don't want anyone's leftovers. Right? Like, I did a volunteer thing last week and I had to squeeze it in before bed when I finished my Thrive work because that was a volunteer thing.
• 1:15:53
  So know mamas that we take this very seriously, and we are giving our absolute best to build out the most robust training community on the market for homeschool moms. We don't bat an eye. Nail techs go to school to get certified. Nurses go to school to get certified. Now you don't need a certification to homeschool, but I'm talking about the concept of the investment in yourself to become good at this job.
• 1:16:18
  And there are skills. There are homeschooling skills that need to be built, And that is what we do, we continue to do, we strive to do better. We're always evaluating what needs to change, what needs to stay, what needs to go, all of the things. So I want to end today with a quote that brought me to tears the first time I saw it. I circled it here.
• 1:16:42
  And I'll let you guys comment on this. All of you don't have to comment on it, but if you have, if something tugs at your heart, mentors, please share after I have read this quote. And this is from Amariah. I have this image in my head of Thrive, which is women reaching a hand back and forward, grasping another woman's hand on each end, and it's just an ongoing chain. That's big.
• 1:17:09
  That's that's yeah. That's a lot for me to take. That that's how she would describe. To me, that's not me. That is beyond the structure that we've built.
• 1:17:22
  That is we've invited something bigger. And honestly, this is an answer to my prayers of building a community where women feel equipped and a deep sense of belonging. So what do you have to say about that quote? Because it's a lot to take. Yeah.
• 1:17:40
  Marnie: I think the the equipping part of that is just beautiful. Like Julie and I get to see these moms come in from the beginning and then we get to watch them be equipped over time. And then we get to watch them reach back and pull another mama in as they're learning and growing too. And I think that has just been such a fun part of this journey is watching the chat just kind of, as a mom is sharing, like sometimes I'm like, Hey, yeah, I said that. And now you're saying that to another mom, like Denise and I are kind of training these moms to mentor each other.
• 1:18:15
  Like they're sharing their growth and what they've learned with other moms and I just love that so much.
• 1:18:21
  Denise: You know I remember when, Mariah said this. She said this within the first week that she was in Thrive. It was during an office hours, her first office hours, and she was so bowled over at the spirit of the moms when they came together and I remember thinking, Man that is remarkable. That is remarkable that the culture of Thrive is that reaching forward and reaching backward. It's not just our veteran moms are not saying, Catch up girls.
• 1:18:51
  Good luck. They're definitely reaching back and saying, Let me show you. Let me tell you how it was for me. One thing that fosters this culture is what you created from the beginning, Christy, and that is that we don't give unsolicited advice. If you want us to advise you, if you want another mom to weigh in and give you some advice, you have to say that specifically.
• 1:19:19
  But if you just want to share because you're acclimating to the truth that you're really not alone and you just want to share and put your heart out there for other moms to come and give you verbal hugs, you can do that. And nobody's going to come at you with all of you should have, why didn't you, have you tried, unless
• 1:19:39
  Julie: you
• 1:19:40
  Denise: say, Can you give me some advice here? Or I'm looking for advice here. And that really fosters that grasping of the hands because when you're holding hands with someone, you have that connection and you are feeling even their energy of what they need and what they want and what they don't need.
• 1:19:58
  Julie: Yeah, I think that it's just a beautiful visual. And homeschooling can feel lonely if you don't have a like minded community, I think. And so I think we can get a mom in here who is, as she joins, she feels sort of alone in the calling of what she's here to do but not sure of how to do it. And she gets in here feeling like I'm, you know, I'm sort of I don't have anyone else that's in the same, you know, place as me, And pretty quickly someone reaches their hand out to her, and she suddenly feels not alone in that. And as she works through it, she gets such a sure footing that another mom comes in and she sees that in that mom's eyes and she reaches out to that mom with her hand and says, I've been there.
• 1:20:57
  And that's what we were saying about, you know, advice isn't given unless it's asked for. But so often someone doesn't always need advice. They just need to know they're not alone.
• 1:21:09
  Christy-Faith: Absolutely. Yeah. Well, I think you did a masterful job at the difficult task of trying to capture the Thrive experience and what it feels like for a mom to join. Mom listening today, I hope this was helpful with your decision. This is airing when we're about to have an opening week.
• 1:21:31
  This is just one of the pieces that I hope helps you put together whether or not Thrive is a fit for you. And please don't hear us wrong. We're not gonna try to sell you anything that's not gonna work for you or that you don't want. We just wanted you to know really what Thrive is and the heart and soul of it so that you can decide if this is something that you want for your family. So I hope it did that today.
• 1:21:54
  That was the goal. And next week, we will be back to regular programming. Thanks so much for joining us.