Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 4 - Episode 26 - The Marshmallow Experiment

Transcript

Season 4 - Episode 26 - The Marshmallow Experiment · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

• 0:01
  Hey everybody, welcome to the good Morning from the Chicken
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  Coop podcast. My name is Kim Johnson and I am
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  a mastermind set coach. Creative strategist and also.
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  Happen to be a farmer? This is my chicken coop and I
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  come out here every day to record a podcast to teach
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  distinctions, possibilities, new ways of thinking and just bring
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  some joy into the world. So welcome to the coop and let's
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  start your day off in a fantastic way.
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  Hey everybody, good morning. So not in the chicken coop this
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  morning. You know, I always like to
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  disclose my location. I'm actually standing in the
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  pantry because I'm holding a marshmallow.
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  Now you might be saying, well, why is she in the pantry?
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  Well, it's dark, it's cold, it's icy, and I didn't want to walk
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  out there in the dark. So we're talking about a
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  marshmallow because many, many years ago, 1972, Stanford
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  University did a, an experiment with a bunch of children.
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  And it's called the marshmallow experiment.
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  You can look it up and it's really interesting because
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  basically the idea behind it was let's see what happens when we
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  ask children for a delayed gratification.
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  And the rule was they put a marshmallow on a plate in front
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  of children and said if you, you can eat it right now if you
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  choose to. However, if you wait 15 minutes,
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  you'll get an extra 1. Now, as many of you probably
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  imagine, a lot of kids just ate it immediately because that's
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  what they wanted to. And then there were other kids
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  that actually waited. They amused themselves by
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  twirling in their chairs. They got up, they went away from
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  the table. They didn't look at it because
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  15 minutes seems like forever when you're a kid.
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  But what they were really doing was seeing who could, you know,
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  delay gratification and what the what that the outcome of this
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  would be long term, meaning looking forward after years of
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  doing, you know, the experiment, looking forward and saying what
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  happened to these children that were able to do delayed
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  gratification as a child and wait when they were older and
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  see how they handled life. And ironically, there was a very
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  interesting correlation between those that could wait and their
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  levels of success and what happened in their life to those
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  who couldn't. So one might come to the
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  conclusion that, you know, it, it all starts early.
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  I mean, this can be a very learned behaviour.
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  This is what's so crazy. You can teach yourself to be
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  interested in having delayed gratification even as a an
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  adult, but it takes time and it takes effort.
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  And so when they were doing this with these children, a lot of
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  these children that were able to do it were significantly more
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  successful than those who were not able to do it.
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  And they, those children lived more in the impulsive stage of
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  themselves. So I started thinking about this
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  and I started thinking about this from the perspective of the
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  bus and how how fascinating it is that it always comes back to
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  us being able to manage our emotions.
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  I mean, literally, we are constantly talking about being
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  able to manage emotions and in every situation how that comes
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  up, how that affects us. Imagine if we were taught this
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  as children. Imagine if we were taught that
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  we could manage our emotions very early on in our lives.
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  What effect that would have on us?
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  I mean, this is part of the reason why I wrote the books,
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  the children's books to begin with.
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  But it's really reinforcing it in my mind now more than ever
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  that this is something that we we pay attention to when we need
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  to, but we don't pay attention to it as a moving forward
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  strategy. So if we are not demonstrating
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  it for ourselves, how can our children demonstrate it?
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  If we are not demonstrating the the delayed gratification of not
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  getting on our phones during dinner or not doing something
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  that we're not supposed to be doing, how can we possibly
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  expect them to do it? I think that this is such an, a
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  tremendous reminder for all of us about who and how we show up
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  so that we can do it better for them all the time.
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  Now I am, I mean, I have a 16 year old in my home.
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  My daughter's, you know, out on her own, grown, married, about
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  to have a child. And I am so adamant about the
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  fact that I want to set a good example for my son.
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  I have put aside things that I, I really think help him
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  understand it. Like, for instance, I don't go
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  to dinner and grab a glass of wine or a beer anymore.
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  Just because I can doesn't mean I should.
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  And so I've made that decision for myself, for my body.
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  I shouldn't do it because I don't feel great when I do it.
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  So I've made the decision to not do it.
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  And he notices it because he'll say to me, oh, you're not having
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  a glass of wine or you're not having a beer.
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  No, I'm not. And he's like, I'm never going
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  to drink. And I'm like, OK, I love, I love
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  that he believes that he's never going to drink.
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  And I hope that he doesn't, because for me, I feel like it
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  would be a great choice for him not to.
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  Now granted, this is very personal choices.
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  Everybody's entitled to their opinions of it.
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  But I feel like alcohol does more damage to the body than
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  it's worth. Now that's just my opinion and
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  it surely shows up in my body that way.
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  And my son has adopted it, that belief and I love that.
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  But to the point is the delayed gratification, just don't get
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  it. Just just move past it, let it
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  go. I don't need instant
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  gratification of something. So again, doing these little
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  examples in our world is something that we can do all the
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  time, whether it's not getting something immediately,
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  purchasing it, not picking up the phone with the constant
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  scrolling on. I'm not impulsively buying
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  something just because, oh, you know what, I felt like it and
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  you know you shouldn't have it, like the doughnut or something
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  that isn't healthy for you, like the alcohol.
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  But the point is, set the examples for yourself and those
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  around you. Look at that delayed
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  gratification because there is something in that.
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  All right, my friends, I hope you have a blessed day and I
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  will see you tomorrow. Bye.