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LIFEBOATS · The Karen Kenney Show

• 0:01
  Karen Kenney: Hey you guys, welcome to the Karen Kenney show. I'm super duper excited to be here with you, and I think I'm just going to dive right into this sucker. This
• 0:09
  one might be short and sweet. It's just a little parable. It's a little story, something that I've been thinking about. And I know some of you, or most of you, have
• 0:18
  probably heard this example before, but some of you might not have so let's just dive right into this. I think I'm going to call this suck a lifeboats. Life. Lifeboats. Oh,
• 0:31
  my God. Some days I feel like I could use a lifeboat double A man hands, if you know what I'm talking about. Okay, so I was talking to somebody, I was talking to
• 0:40
  somebody the other day, and we were just talking about a particular situation that was happening in their life, and one of the things that I said to them, and some of you
• 0:50
  might be able to relate to this, if you have ever been in a relationship with somebody who was hell bent On getting in their own way, causing their own suffering, being
• 1:04
  there a cock blocking themselves from happiness. You know what I mean? Oh, my God. And one of the things that I said is, look, we cannot save people from themselves, like
• 1:14
  some people insist on doing it their way or the hard way or whatever, and they're not really interested in being helped, or at least they're not interested in being helped
• 1:31
  in the way that it's being offered. So let me just tell you a little story. So you guys, I'm sure some of you have heard this before. I'm not saying this is original, but
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  I always love this little, this little, I don't know, what is it? A parable, an allegory, a metaphor, I don't know. No, it's not a metaphor. But so there's a, there's a
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  little town, right? There's a flood that we know that the forecast has said, hey, the levee is going to break, the water's going to rise like, you know, do your best, like,
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  get out of town, or whatever. You know, how some people out there stubborn, and they stick around a little too long. So there's this one guy, and he's got, like, a house,
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  it's got, like, a couple of levels, right? Like a first floor, second floor, whatever. And the water starts, you know, starts to come, starting to spread around town. And so
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  his neighbors, like, are going to get out of dodge. And the neighbor like, comes by, and he's got his car packed, and he's like, Hey buddy, like, come in. Like, we gotta get out
• 2:23
  of town. We gotta evacuate. And the guy says, Oh no, don't worry about it. God's gonna save me. The guy's like, okay, like, you did his best. Drove off. The guy stays.
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  Now the water starts to rise and it comes up to, like, over his first floor. His whole first floor is flooded. So he goes up to the second floor and floor, and he's in the
• 2:43
  second floor now, and these guys come by and, you know, the little rescue boats are in their little like, paddle boat, canoe thing, and he's got his head hanging out,
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  like the second floor window. And they're like, Come on, sir. Like, get in the boat. Like, we're here to help you. And he's like, no, no, no. God's gonna save me. Don't worry
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  about it, whatever. I'll be fine. God's gonna help me, whatever. Okay, then the water comes up to the second floor. He crawls out. Now he's sitting on his roof,
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  right? And the the rescue people now are out in the helicopters, and the helicopter comes by and they like, drop the ladder. And they're like, dude, let's go, like, get up
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  in the, you know, the thing you know, we'll send somebody down. We're going to hook you up. And he's like, no, no, no. Like, God's going to save me. Whatever. You know, where
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  this story is going, right? The water comes up too high. The guy drowns. He dies. He goes up. Least he was up in heaven. Good enough guy, right? Quote, unquote, good
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  enough guy to go up to heaven in this story. So he's at the pearly gates, and he's talking to, you know, he sees guys talking to God, as if God could be a body. But you
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  know what I'm saying, roll with me. And he says, you know, he's like, God, like, How could you let me drown? Like I believed in you and I prayed to you and I tried to be a
• 4:00
  good person. He's like, how could you How could you let me drown? He's like, What are you talking about? He's like, I did. He's like, why do you know the guy's like, why
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  didn't you help me? And God's like, What are you talking about? I had the neighbor come by with the car, I sent the guys in the boat, and then I sent the helicopter.
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  And here's what I want to say you guys, if you're going through a time, if you're going through a rough patch, if you are questioning some things, it's really easy to
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  get stuck in our patterns and our identities and our beliefs and our structures that we were conditioned by our families and our younger years, or whatever. You know, we get
• 4:44
  so hung up on our own preferences and our own expectations and our own wants and desires and how we think the help is going to come to us. And a lot of times right the
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  answers, or. Help or the solutions do not come in the forms that we expect. And if we insist on assuming that the answer is going to come from this person or this book or
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  that thing, or whatever, this institution, this doctor, this therapist, this whatever, if we insist that there's only one right, acceptable way that answers can come to us.
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  If we're going to be we're going to be missing out on a lot of opportunities to learn, to heal, to get better. Because even though, like, sometimes even let's just
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  forget external things, like sometimes the greatest answer lies within us, but we don't even think it doesn't even occur to us to look inside for our own wisdom, for our own
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  internal teacher. But sometimes a book's going to fall off a shelf, or somebody's going to step in front of you and you're going to go like, Oh, they can't possibly
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  know what I'm going through. They can't possibly know the answer. And it's not true, right? Sometimes we expect or want or insist the help to look a particular way. You know,
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  and I know like, there are some people who, like, won't take, won't take help from women. They don't think women are good coaches or whatever, right? Or they won't
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  take help from somebody who's a different race or somebody who's gay, or somebody who's this or this or this, or they don't think that this person could possibly
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  understand them, because they're too old or they're too young or whatever. And we get really hung up in these very narrow, narrow like perceptions, and they keep us, they
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  keep us from getting help, and they keep us from healing, and they keep us from discovering some gems. You know what I'm saying? And I was just thinking about this.
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  You know, sometimes you just can't help people if they're not willing to be helped, and they're not willing to be open minded enough, open sighted enough, open, had it
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  enough to maybe discover a solution or a something, a system or a tool or a new way of being or thinking, because they really are just hung up on, you know, they're in
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  that like, I know, right? Like, I know it's supposed to come from this. It's like, yeah, no, but sometimes the divine, I always say Holy Spirit's going to use, like, whoever
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  and whatever they can. And whether that's showing you a license plate, whether that's a song coming on the radio, whether it's you seeing the spine of a book in a bookstore,
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  you sitting in a waiting room somewhere, and all of a sudden that exact article that you needed to read, or your friend sends you a funny text, or you bump into somebody random
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  when you go to get a coffee, or whatever. I really do think that, you know, call it your spiritual team, call it your divine helpers. Call it whatever you want to call it. I do
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  think that there is a force of love that is often trying to help us, but we have to be, as I always say, we have to be open for business. And I come at this too from and
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  I've talked about this before in other ways, how a lot of times people have tried, like, every other thing, like they're suffering, and so they're like, Oh, I'll go to therapy,
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  or oh, I'll go to yoga, or oh, I'll invest in this business coach, or oh, I'll do this thing, or I'll do that thing. And one of the last things that they consider is working
• 8:30
  with a spiritual mentor. And I'm not a typical quote, unquote, spiritual mentor. And in fact, when I like Google, when I google spiritual mentor. I kind of cringe a
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  little bit because it's often associated, like, with religion and churches. And not that there's anything wrong with that, but I think that those words have been kind of
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  pigeon holed, like spiritual advisor. And I'm kind of like, I don't know, a spiritual coach. Call it a spiritual mentor, whatever. It's not that. But even that word spiritual
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  has been co opted, and a lot of times, people don't think that the solution can be in the spiritual realm. But I'm not just, I'm not like a typical spiritual mentor. I
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  also bring in all these other tools and all these other points of views, everything from being a yoga student and a passage meditator, and you know, a yoga teacher for
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  like, 25 years, and somebody who comes from a background of Reiki and Thai Yoga massage, and I'm a writer and I'm a storyteller, and I know the power of of narrative and telling
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  your story, and the power of having a DSP and being a hypnotist and knowing, like, the power of coaching the unconscious mind and tapping into conversational hypnosis. And
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  there's a lot that kind of comes into this work. And I'm not trying to, like, just do I'm not like, he had to, like, do a. An advertisement, like a marketing like promo
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  for myself, although it's my podcast, I could do that if I want to, but there's a point, a bigger point that I'm trying to make, is that a lot of times when they're
• 10:12
  suffering or there's a problem, people know that they're having symptoms, whether it's an unhappy marriage or they can't get out of their own way, or they're an entrepreneur,
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  but they're too afraid to put themselves out there, or they're trying to, like, you know, deal with their anxiety and work their way through some some stuff that's gone down in
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  their life, and figure themselves out and figure out, like, why do I do this? Why do I have this lack of self love, and why don't I keep my word to myself, and like all these
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  things that come with the human experience, and yet, sometimes a spiritual mentor will be the last place that they would look for help or look for the solution. And I'm just
• 10:54
  here to tell you know, if you've come across me in your social media feed, or you've been listening to this show for a long time, and you've tried a lot of other things and
• 11:03
  things weren't working. Why not? Why not give it a shot? Why not come and join the nest for one month, 50 bucks, see how it feels to be a part of a community that maybe
• 11:15
  does things a little bit differently. Maybe you want to try working with me one to one for four months and see what kind of progress you're making. Because I can tell
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  you that the people that I have worked with and do work with, they do experience great change, and it's change over time. You know, a friend the other day was saying, you know,
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  the work that that I do is really deeply sustainable, and that's the thing is, I'm not here to fix you or to huh, you're not fucking broken. That's why I don't want to
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  fix you. It is, however, about giving ourselves new tools and new perspectives and new ways of being like new transformational ways of thinking, tools that can literally
• 12:00
  shift your mind from a place of fear to a place of love that can help your nervous system regulate, to shift out of that sympathetic that fight and flight, and learn
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  how to enter into the relaxation response in a non jarring way. You know what I mean? So in your life. You know, maybe you've missed some of those car rides, maybe you've missed
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  some of those boats, maybe you've missed the helicopter. But it doesn't end there. There are people like me out in the world. I mean, there's many, there's a gazillion of us,
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  right? But you're listening to this show, and if you can hear my the sound of my voice, then maybe this is exactly where you were meant to be. You know, I drew this
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  little picture the other day. I had my sweetie write the words, because his handwriting is a lot neater than mine. So if you're listening to this and not watching
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  this, I'm just going to hold this up so you can see it. And I was talking about, like, these are the elements of the stuff that I do. So what you basically have is, at the
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  center of this picture is a hat, a red hat that says Love in the middle of it. And around that hat is a triangle, and the words around that hat say mind, body, spirit. And
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  then around the triangle there's a box. There's a square, and the four edges of that square say, physical, emotional, emotional, spiritual, mental, and this is the way that
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  I help. I bring all of these aspects together, right? I always say it's the somatic, the body, it's the spiritual, it's the subconscious reprogramming, it's the
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  neuroscience of the mind and the brain. So all of these areas get addressed. And so that's all I'm going to say for today. Thank you for listening. If you're still
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  listening, I want to just say like this work right here is the most important work that we do in our lives, working on ourselves, coming to understand ourselves, knowing why
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  we do what we do, think, what we think, believe, what we believe, say what we say, the behaviors and the choices that we make. And if you're like, what like, if you're
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  just like, ready to try something new,
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  I hope you reach out to me, because I would love to hear from you. And I, you know, like to think like, I like to be kind of like a little life raft in a lifeboat for other
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  people. You know, when somebody's just been like out in the water, dog paddling for so long, and they just need a little buoyancy. They just need to be held a little bit, who
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  knows, so they can gain their strength back, so they can catch their breath, so they can get their mind right, so they can get back in the games, they can get back to the
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  business of love, right? It's like spiritual mentoring in the nest. It's like a little sanctuary. It's like a little cocoon where transformation can happen. When you think
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  about like the little caterpillar turning into the butterfly, it needs a place where it can be like in a safe. Haba, you know what I mean. So this is how I kind of think
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  about it. So I'm sending the car, I'm sending the boat, I'm sending the helicopter, and I'm sending you this message, and it lands for you. I hope to
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  hear from you. And look, if you're out in the world, maybe you can be a lifeboat for somebody else too. And we all need each other. We're better together, and there are
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  powers that be would try to divide us and make us think and forget about our unity, but it is in our strength, it's in our togetherness that we're going to find our
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  strength. So just thank you for listening, and I appreciate you. And wherever you go, may you leave yourself and the animals and the other people and the places and the
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  environment better than how you found it. Wherever you go, may you and your love and your energy and your presence be not only a lifeboat, but a blessing. Bye, bye.