Latest / Constellations and all that... / 96. Unnecessary Trauma, Family Constellations & the Wisdom of Listening with Linda Conyard

Transcript

96. Unnecessary Trauma, Family Constellations & the Wisdom of Listening with Linda Conyard · Constellations and all that...

• 0:00
  Tracy: Kia ora, and welcome to Constellations and All That.
• 0:03
  Tracy: I'm your host, Tracey Cartwright, and together we will be exploring the world of family constellations with facilitators from, and clients from around the world, looking at different perspectives and experiences in the work, having a cup of tea and just chatting with some friends around their experiences in constellations.
• 0:23
  Tracy: We'd love for you to join us.
• 0:25
  Tracy: I hope that you enjoy this series as much as I have loved making it.
• 0:34
  Tracy: Kia ora, everyone.
• 0:35
  Tracy: Welcome to Constellations and All That.
• 0:38
  Tracy: Today, I have the pleasure of chatting with Linda Conyard.
• 0:42
  Tracy: Hey, Linda.
• 0:42
  Tracy: Welcome.
• 0:43
  Linda: Hey, Tracy.
• 0:44
  Linda: Good to see you again.
• 0:45
  Tracy: I'm really glad that, to have you on board.
• 0:47
  Tracy: We've, uh, we met many years ago at, uh, the intensive in a, in Sydney.
• 0:53
  Tracy: And, um, and we've managed to catch up a few times over the years, so really great to have you here.
• 0:59
  Linda: Thank you.
• 1:00
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 1:01
  Tracy: I'd love for you to introduce yourself to the listeners and the viewers so that they can learn a little bit more about you.
• 1:08
  Linda: I'm a trauma therapist in private practice, and one thing that I never, ever thought I would do is write a book, and I wrote a book called Unnecessary Trauma.
• 1:17
  Linda: Mm. And that book has come about through my own experiences of trauma, and when trauma was, um, exacerbated, and when it was actually a process that was quite, um, I wouldn't say fully healing, but it, it, it… The trauma still happened, but something else happened in that connection.
• 1:37
  Linda: So it's, that's my life, my story is weaved through there, and the experiences and, um, recognition of unnecessary trauma.
• 1:46
  Linda: has been, like, highlighted.
• 1:49
  Linda: Probably give you an example a little later on when we're talking, but yeah, that, that's been a bit of a highlight in my life.
• 1:54
  Linda: And I'm working on an app.
• 1:56
  Linda: I'm working on a, a app which is called A Safe Place, and m- uh, the work that I've done over the years will be on there for people to use.
• 2:04
  Linda: And it's funny, it came about because, um, some clients in the early days of my practice would say, "Oh, God, I just need a Linda app." You know?
• 2:13
  Tracy: Mm.
• 2:14
  Linda: For that gap in between sessions.
• 2:16
  Tracy: So is it gonna be called the Linda app?
• 2:18
  Linda: Oh, some of them were really funny, 'cause they, they became founding members, the people that are close to me and have worked with me for a long time, and they've become founding members.
• 2:26
  Linda: And, um, yeah, they joked about calling it the Linda app.
• 2:30
  Linda: But then one of them wrote in the…'Cause I just asked for, you know,"Give me your ideas, and we'll, we'll have a look at them." Mm. And one said,"I just need a safe place." And it's like, oh, my God, that's the name of it.
• 2:40
  Linda: So it's called A Safe Place.
• 2:42
  Tracy: A Safe Place.
• 2:43
  Linda: Yeah.
• 2:43
  Tracy: Fantastic.
• 2:45
  Linda: Yeah, I'm excited.
• 2:45
  Linda: Fantastic.
• 2:46
  Linda: And I get to actually build it, Tracy.
• 2:47
  Linda: I don't have to try and change my sensing of things into some kind of logic for, like, someone who's tech-minded to create the app.
• 2:57
  Linda: So it's just, like, straight me, straight in building this app, and I'm real excited.
• 3:01
  Linda: Got a lot to learn.
• 3:02
  Linda: Yeah.
• 3:02
  Linda: But it's cool.
• 3:03
  Tracy: Yeah, yeah.
• 3:05
  Linda: Yeah.
• 3:05
  Tracy: So you, so you're quite tech-savvy?
• 3:07
  Linda: Well, um, I wouldn't say I'm… Well, I'm, I'm not too bad, but, you know, I can get confused by technology, so we'll just see how it goes.
• 3:15
  Tracy: Good on you for giving it a go.
• 3:17
  Linda: Yeah, yeah.
• 3:18
  Tracy: Beautiful.
• 3:19
  Tracy: So tell me, how did you f- how did constellations first find you?
• 3:23
  Linda: Well, I started my master's in Gestalt psychotherapy, and through that, meeting people through there, I found out about constellations.
• 3:33
  Linda: Then I met Margueritte Koening up in Maleny way.
• 3:35
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 3:36
  Linda: She'd been teaching it for many years, and one of the elders of-- You would have met Margueritte, one of the elders of constellation work here.
• 3:43
  Linda: And I just fell in love with it.
• 3:45
  Linda: I just knew in every ounce of my being that this is an incredible healing opportunity, and I decided to study that alongside my master's, because I was going to, um, use them both, and I have- Yeah always used them both.
• 4:02
  Tracy: They're a great melding, aren't they?
• 4:04
  Tracy: The c- the constellations and the gestalt
• 4:07
  Linda: I think so.
• 4:08
  Linda: So not everybody likes it, but for me, I think it's the perfect mix, yes
• 4:12
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 4:13
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 4:14
  Tracy: And when I first met you, you were doing TRE?
• 4:18
  Linda: That's right, the trauma release exercises.
• 4:20
  Linda: Still use that, yes.
• 4:21
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 4:22
  Linda: Yep, that's amazing also.
• 4:24
  Tracy: That was my first experience with it.
• 4:25
  Linda: Yeah.
• 4:26
  Tracy: Oh, I remember coming home and trying to get everybody that I knew to give it a go.
• 4:32
  Tracy: Um, I don't, don't know if I should say this on here.
• 4:36
  Tracy: I remember the physical release was so big, 'cause you do this… Can you explain it a little bit for the, for the listeners and the viewers?
• 4:45
  Linda: Yeah, sure.
• 4:45
  Linda: So trauma, TRE, trauma release exercises, is a way of using the body's natural process of letting go of tension in the body, which is a tremoring response.
• 4:56
  Linda: Unfortunately, we in the West mostly, but we, the, the maybe the medical model, uh, pathologize it, when actually it's our natural way of releasing the charge that's trapped in the body.
• 5:10
  Tracy: Yeah, 'cause when you shake, right, they go, "Oh, you're going into shock," and they stop you from shaking, right?
• 5:13
  Tracy: Yeah,
• 5:14
  Linda: stop you from shaking.
• 5:15
  Linda: And it's, and same as, uh, childbirth, same thing, when you get that shaking in childbirth.
• 5:20
  Linda: It's the body letting, letting go of the charge, and that's what we try to, you know, um, find a way to do that.
• 5:28
  Linda: Otherwise, it just gets trapped, then it becomes some kind of illness along the way.
• 5:32
  Linda: You know, and it's down a horrible-looking path.
• 5:35
  Linda: Mm. But the TRE, it's like you sort of lie, like, on your back.
• 5:39
  Linda: There's exercises you can do beforehand if you wanna, um, put some stress on the, on the muscles so that the tremoring comes.
• 5:46
  Linda: It's
• 5:46
  Tracy: kind of like you're triggering them and activating them, aren't you, to- Yeah, you're inviting them in … to do the release
• 5:50
  Linda: Yeah, inviting them in.
• 5:51
  Linda: Because you lie on your back and then that, people know in yoga the butterfly pose, where the, the knee, you allow your knees to fall apart.
• 6:00
  Linda: Um, and then you just bring up the knees with little bit by little bit, and the inner thigh, there's tension in the inner thigh muscles, and then that allows the tremoring to start.
• 6:10
  Tracy: 'Cause I remember afterwards, and I'm lying there and I think I, I… Well, I know I did.
• 6:16
  Tracy: I said it out really loud, "Oh, my God, that was like an orgasm."
• 6:21
  Linda: Exactly.
• 6:22
  Linda: Well, that's, that's-
• 6:23
  Tracy: And I had a couple of people just sit up and look at me and go, "I want what she had."
• 6:31
  Linda: Yeah.
• 6:31
  Tracy: It's so good.
• 6:32
  Linda: Yeah.
• 6:32
  Linda: Well, the body shakes at different times.
• 6:34
  Linda: Childbirth, orgasm, same.
• 6:36
  Linda: Mm. And when there's a charge in the body.
• 6:38
  Linda: Um, but it's, it's quite profound, and when I was studying it, I- I had trouble shaking.
• 6:45
  Linda: 'Cause my main response was freeze.
• 6:48
  Linda: And I'm not sure whether there's a… I think there's a bit of a link to this.
• 6:51
  Linda: I haven't proven it.
• 6:52
  Linda: But I was against the wall doing one of the chair one where you're against the wall and you, and you slide down and then you're in, like, this chair position, and that's quite, um, hard for the thigh muscles.
• 7:02
  Linda: So they- It's very hard for the thigh muscles.
• 7:04
  Linda: Yeah.
• 7:04
  Linda: So then the tremoring comes there.
• 7:06
  Linda: People would sort of bounce up and down.
• 7:07
  Linda: So we did all of the pre-exercises as we were learning it so that we had the experience of it.
• 7:12
  Linda: And, um, I couldn't-- I had this cramping muscle at the right-hand side of my spine.
• 7:18
  Linda: It was just, like, so tight, and I'd have to get off the wall and just let it go.
• 7:22
  Linda: And every time I went back, this cramping kept happening.
• 7:26
  Linda: A good lesson.
• 7:26
  Linda: Instead of just taking s- a break and, and not continuing on, I kept going.
• 7:32
  Linda: And then I had this sleep through the night, which was fine, and the next day, I felt like I'd been hit by a bus.
• 7:39
  Linda: Oh,
• 7:39
  Tracy: wow.
• 7:40
  Linda: I was just so exhausted.
• 7:41
  Linda: So I had not listened to my body, but I also didn't know that at the time.
• 7:46
  Linda: Didn't listen to my body saying that was enough.
• 7:49
  Linda: And, you know, you sort of think s- you know, a, a movement like that in the body, the clenching of the muscle, isn't such a big deal.
• 7:57
  Linda: But it actually is.
• 7:58
  Linda: If the body can't process what's been released, then we're left with that kind of an experience where it's, like, you you don't feel real great.
• 8:07
  Linda: But I had to go back to class the next day.
• 8:09
  Tracy: So how do you describe constellations?
• 8:13
  Tracy: How do you describe it when you're meeting someone for the first time, maybe?
• 8:18
  Linda: So, for me it's an invitation to connect with the ancestral field, and we don't do that very well.
• 8:25
  Linda: Mm. So it's like it's very new to, to us.
• 8:28
  Linda: And also the field starts, uh, jumping into action as soon as I set a date for the constellation.
• 8:36
  Linda: Like, all this stuff happens.
• 8:37
  Linda: People are in, they're out, they're in, they're out.
• 8:40
  Linda: I don't worry about who's coming until we're in the room together on the day, then I know who's coming.
• 8:45
  Linda: But the constellation work is a way to explore what might be out of order in the family system, what we might be carrying forward as a result of it not being dealt with, you know, wherever the incident or whatever it was that happened.
• 9:00
  Linda: And that shows up in many, many ways.
• 9:02
  Linda: Many ways.
• 9:03
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 9:04
  Tracy: Lovely.
• 9:05
  Tracy: I love asking that question, 'cause I get… You know, often the, the answers are similar, but there's a, there's a little bit of something from someone else and a bit here and there and-
• 9:14
  Linda: Yeah… Tracy: yeah, that's really cool.
• 9:17
  Linda: Now, I know you do a lot of work in the trauma field.
• 9:20
  Linda: Mm-hmm.
• 9:21
  Tracy: Would you like to speak to that a little bit around h- and how that, how what you bring to constellations?
• 9:28
  Tracy: I'll just throw that in the field there you go.
• 9:30
  Tracy: Trauma and Linda.
• 9:32
  Tracy: How do you deal with it?
• 9:33
  Linda: Well, I actually love working in that field, and I'm very comfortable with however that looks.
• 9:39
  Linda: Mm.
• 9:40
  Linda: Whether it's anger, whether it's shutdown, whether whatever it is, it doesn't matter.
• 9:44
  Linda: And I, and because of the constellation work, I just use the field, and also gestalt, the field to show me what's needed next.
• 9:52
  Linda: So, I mean, I've sat on the phone for an hour while someone didn't speak the whole time.
• 9:58
  Linda: I've, um, had, um, one client just running up and down on the grass.
• 10:03
  Linda: Movement, it's just what was called for.
• 10:05
  Linda: Like many, many things.
• 10:06
  Linda: Whatever's in my environment I use.
• 10:08
  Linda: So it doesn't matter where I am, we can do a constellation.
• 10:11
  Linda: So basically, I look- Uh, for the micro movements, I'll, I'll listen for the voice.
• 10:18
  Linda: I'll just observe.
• 10:19
  Linda: I get a sense of something.
• 10:21
  Linda: Sometimes if someone can't feel something, it'll happen in my body, and then I might just say, "Oh, I've just got this sensation in my belly.
• 10:27
  Linda: You know, does that mean anything for you?" And usually then there's an, a connection to it.
• 10:31
  Linda: So the field shows us what is ready and what's potentially willing to be addressed and looked at and seen.
• 10:38
  Linda: Mm. So everybody is different.
• 10:40
  Linda: I just, I never-- I do make notes, but I never look at them, unless we have to, but I never look at them because when they come in, it's like I meet them where they are in that moment.
• 10:49
  Linda: In that moment is where we meet.
• 10:51
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 10:52
  Tracy: And so you do one-on-ones and group work?
• 10:55
  Linda: Yeah.
• 10:56
  Linda: Anyth- anything like that, yeah.
• 10:57
  Linda: So whatever, whatever's called for, I'm open to it.
• 11:01
  Tracy: And, and I'll just ask, when you do one-on-ones, do you use objects or do you-- 'cause some people use objects, some people use markers on the floor or… Yeah.
• 11:11
  Linda: Whatever's there, whatever's around and whatever comes to me.
• 11:14
  Linda: So the markers on the floor, yes, I could do that for someone who's looking at the lineage of their life, so what's in the lineage of their own life, but I don't use markers.
• 11:23
  Linda: I just go, take a step back for each, you know, year.
• 11:27
  Linda: And it might be gaps in the year, doesn't matter.
• 11:28
  Linda: Just have an idea of, you know, I'm five, I'm two, whatever it is, and just get them all into alignment, and then when they reach their current age, then that woman usually can get a felt sense of that whole experience of those years lived in this moment.
• 11:48
  Linda: So often our child self is in front of us leading the life-
• 11:52
  Tracy: Mm
• 11:53
  Linda: because it's seeking healing.
• 11:55
  Linda: So we put that where that child self belongs.
• 11:58
  Linda: So that's your place there, and then the adult can be the adult.
• 12:03
  Linda: So whatever, just, it's just the most bizarre thing.
• 12:07
  Linda: Like, things just pop out at me and I go, "Oh yeah, that," and we just do that.
• 12:10
  Linda: So I don't re- I never have a plan, and then things just pop out and they just happen.
• 12:15
  Linda: Even if the, uh, client that I'm with doesn't know they're gonna be talking about something, I've got usually a sense of something that's coming.
• 12:23
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 12:23
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 12:24
  Linda: And I just give it the space of silence, 'cause silence is, it's such a gift if you can sit in silence, and I sort of learnt that from 15 years volunteering in the palliative care area, that there's nothing to do when people are dying except just to be.
• 12:38
  Tracy: In the palliative care?
• 12:40
  Linda: Yeah.
• 12:40
  Tracy: In your family system-
• 12:42
  Linda: Mm-hmm
• 12:44
  Tracy: How have you seen constellations supported?
• 12:47
  Linda: Supported?
• 12:48
  Tracy: Supporting your family system … supporting my,
• 12:50
  Linda: yeah.
• 12:50
  Linda: My brother suicided a few years ago, and I went to the Sydney, uh, Family Constellation, you know, intensive.
• 12:59
  Tracy: Was that the one in, in the-
• 13:01
  Linda: The m- that, yeah.
• 13:03
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 13:03
  Linda: And it was the guy from England, I just can't quite remember his name.
• 13:06
  Linda: I know-
• 13:06
  Tracy: John Whittington.
• 13:07
  Linda: Right.
• 13:08
  Linda: And I normally don't care.
• 13:10
  Linda: I don't care whether I get a constellation, whether I'm in a con- I never worry.
• 13:13
  Linda: I just love it so much, I don't care.
• 13:14
  Linda: I'm just happy to be there.
• 13:15
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 13:16
  Linda: This day I'm going, "I wanna do a constellation on this." Anyway, I put my hand up.
• 13:21
  Linda: There was about six of us, if you remember, that said, you know, they want, had something, and we had to go around and say what it was we had to do.
• 13:26
  Linda: Anyway, I got selected, and it, I can't, I often can't remember constellations.
• 13:31
  Linda: It's just I'm in the moment, I get the healing- Yeah … and I don't have to remember it all.
• 13:35
  Linda: Anyway, I, I do remember the man that, that represented my brother.
• 13:39
  Linda: He reminded me so much of him.
• 13:41
  Linda: It was just the most incredible thing, and I remember it being a very healing- And settling for my family system.
• 13:50
  Linda: So- Mm … um, I was very grateful for that.
• 13:53
  Linda: Yeah, it was, it helped a lot to just put it in its place for what it was and whatever he was carrying for our family system, and just put that to bed.
• 14:03
  Linda: So it was really good.
• 14:05
  Linda: I mean, you can do anything.
• 14:06
  Linda: I've constellated bees, what bees to have here, and I did that with, um, bees as in buzz bees.
• 14:11
  Linda: Yeah.
• 14:11
  Linda: Whether I have native bees or whether I have honeybees on the
• 14:14
  Tracy: property.
• 14:15
  Tracy: Oh, wow.
• 14:15
  Linda: I was trying to make that decision, and Francesca Fa- Mason-Boring was do- You know she does the nature constellations- Yeah one of the things she does, and she's part Shoshone.
• 14:26
  Linda: And I did this constellation, and what it showed up was I love the garden and I love the veggie garden, the, you know, flower garden, veggie garden, but I wasn't honoring the land that was holding it all.
• 14:37
  Linda: So that was my takeaway from that.
• 14:40
  Linda: You know, just, you know, focusing on this stuff, and I wasn't honoring the land.
• 14:44
  Linda: So I came home and I honored the land.
• 14:46
  Linda: And then in the constellation, the two people that were representing the different kind of bees, they both just went and sat down.
• 14:53
  Linda: So, because it didn't matter.
• 14:54
  Linda: It wasn't about the bees.
• 14:55
  Tracy: So what bees did you end up with?
• 14:57
  Linda: Well, I have the native bees, and the honeybees are around too, so they're both here together.
• 15:01
  Tracy: There you go.
• 15:02
  Linda: On the land.
• 15:04
  Tracy: It's interesting how we can come into a constellation sometimes, and we think it's about X, right?
• 15:10
  Linda: Yeah.
• 15:10
  Tracy: And then along comes W and Z. Or M and O. You know?
• 15:16
  Tracy: Like-
• 15:17
  Linda: That's right… Tracy: it's never what we think, right?
• 15:19
  Linda: 'Cause I remember Mark Johnson saying, um, he was, uh, in Wellington, and someone said in the hot seat and said,"Oh, I've got a problem with my wife, and I know what her problem is, and I know it's, and I know, and I know." And he was very patient, and he listened, and then he said… He gently put his hand on him and he said, "So if you already know, then why, why are you in the hot seat?" "Oh, 'cause I don't really know." Okay.
• 15:47
  Linda: Okay.
• 15:47
  Tracy: We'll go from there.
• 15:48
  Linda: Now we can start.
• 15:49
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 15:50
  Tracy: And it was just lovely.
• 15:52
  Tracy: 'Cause when we come in t- with this, "I know what it is, I know where it's gonna come from," and-
• 15:56
  Linda: And sometimes they can end in places- That feel unfinished, but the energy, the energy finishes for that moment.
• 16:05
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 16:05
  Linda: So sometimes people need to take away whatever it is that is unfinished, 'cause that's where it s- that's where it stops.
• 16:12
  Tracy: Have you had a constellation like that where that's, for you, ended that way?
• 16:16
  Linda: Not for me, no.
• 16:17
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 16:18
  Linda: But I have had with people that come to my constellations sometimes, yeah.
• 16:22
  Tracy: Mm.
• 16:22
  Linda: And it-
• 16:22
  Tracy: I have.
• 16:23
  Tracy: I just shared that recently on another one where Ingala, Ingala Rowell-
• 16:27
  Linda: Oh, yes, yes… Tracy: um, had d- had done a piece for me real pivotal moment, and I was thinking,"What the- Yes … do I do with this?" Yep.
• 16:41
  Tracy: But it was the best thing.
• 16:42
  Linda: That's right.
• 16:43
  Tracy: And there are times when a constellation, it's beautiful to g- to go to a closing, and there are other times when it, it needs to be brought to a space and then you take it away and you continue it, right?
• 16:56
  Tracy: You move through the next part of it, 'cause not everything has to have a happy ending.
• 17:01
  Linda: Yeah.
• 17:01
  Linda: That's right.
• 17:02
  Linda: Exactly.
• 17:02
  Linda: Yeah.
• 17:03
  Linda: And it can feel quite unfinished or like you've been ripped off.
• 17:06
  Linda: It can feel a bit like that.
• 17:08
  Linda: The truth is, like you say, that's where it ends.
• 17:11
  Linda: That's where the energy
• 17:12
  Tracy: stops.
• 17:12
  Tracy: It's priceless, to be honest.
• 17:13
  Tracy: It's actually priceless because there's so much more in that in, in, in a deeper way.
• 17:20
  Linda: Yeah.
• 17:21
  Tracy: Um-
• 17:22
  Linda: For whatever reason.
• 17:22
  Linda: Like, sometimes we don't even know why that happens.
• 17:25
  Tracy: I, I re- did a constellation in Bali years ago, and at the time I was just like, "Oh, I didn't… I wasn't gett- I wasn't understanding it." And obviously, you know, we're not meant to understand it, but it wasn't making sense for me for the question that I'd asked either.
• 17:41
  Tracy: But over time it has in a completely different way, and there've been many different layers and I go, "Oh, that's part of that puzzle. Right."
• 17:52
  Linda: Yeah.
• 17:52
  Tracy: Okay.
• 17:53
  Tracy: So it's been, gosh, seven years and I'm still getting the benefit of that one.
• 17:58
  Linda: Yeah, right.
• 17:59
  Linda: Mm-hmm.
• 18:00
  Linda: Exactly.
• 18:01
  Linda: Yep.
• 18:01
  Linda: Yeah.
• 18:02
  Linda: I think it, I think we do it a disservice when we rush through or, or the mind starts to get en- engaged- Mm in what's occurring.
• 18:10
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 18:11
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 18:11
  Tracy: And w- and let's get the next layer done, right?
• 18:14
  Tracy: That happens sometimes.
• 18:15
  Tracy: If we don't give it enough time to integrate, then we're not really seeing… Or maybe sometimes there are things that, that show up that really need to be looked at as well.
• 18:24
  Tracy: So we won't put- Yeah … that one into a box.
• 18:26
  Tracy: Do you have any examples that you could share without sharing anyone's confidentiality or anything like that?
• 18:32
  Tracy: Something that you've seen that's really moved you in the constellation field.
• 18:36
  Tracy: Maybe it's one you've done or one you've been part of or, yeah.
• 18:41
  Linda: There was one lady who came- Uh, to a constellation many, many years ago, and she had a note- notebook and pen with her.
• 18:49
  Linda: And, um, what the constellations were wasn't what she was thinking it was.
• 18:54
  Linda: And she ended up doing a beautiful piece, uh, around her relationship with her mom, but it wasn't what she was expecting.
• 19:01
  Linda: So sh- how people come to the constellation often makes me, uh, giggle because it's like she came here thinking that I was at the front and I'm gonna be teaching, I'm gonna be teaching stuff, and she's gonna write some notes on it.
• 19:14
  Linda: It's like, no, that's not how we're doing it.
• 19:16
  Linda: So she was quite surprised.
• 19:18
  Linda: Mm. But would she have come if she thought it was what it was?
• 19:21
  Linda: You know what I mean?
• 19:21
  Linda: So the field, I love how the field kind of just works and moves people, you know, in the, in the direction where they're meant to be.
• 19:29
  Linda: Mm. And this other lady, she, um, her and her mom never spoke, except they'd ring for birthdays or something like that.
• 19:34
  Linda: Her mom was in England, and she was here.
• 19:37
  Linda: And, um, she was just-- She, she let me know that she, when she went home, she was writing me an email about her experience, um, of the constellation and how she enjoyed it.
• 19:47
  Linda: And in that time, her mom called her to say hi.
• 19:51
  Linda: Wow.
• 19:52
  Linda: Just to say hi.
• 19:53
  Linda: You know, just you can't make that stuff up.
• 19:55
  Linda: Yeah.
• 19:55
  Linda: It's just like, they're, they're sorts of things that are so validating for me about this field and how it works and in its own way, you know?
• 20:04
  Linda: And- Honestly, people arrive sometimes and they don't know what they're there for.
• 20:09
  Linda: It's like, okay, that's all right, let's just see what happens.
• 20:12
  Tracy: Mm. Yeah.
• 20:13
  Tracy: I remember doing… I remember being in a workshop, and I didn't really think I was gonna do a piece of work, but I ended up sitting in the chair, 'cause stuff arose as the day went on, or the weekend went on.
• 20:23
  Tracy: Funny, yeah.
• 20:23
  Tracy: And as I'm sitting in the chair my phone went, and I just clicked it off.
• 20:28
  Tracy: Oh, I could feel it vibrating, that's right.
• 20:31
  Tracy: And, um, afterwards, it was my brother, and so he was f- he was f- really feeling it as well, but without knowing, you know?
• 20:38
  Tracy: So.
• 20:40
  Tracy: Mm. Yeah, how other family members can feel.
• 20:43
  Linda: Yeah.
• 20:43
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 20:44
  Linda: I remember doing one with Stephan Hausner once, uh, quite a while ago, and I don't remember exactly what it was about now, I can't remember.
• 20:58
  Linda: But I do remember that, um, he sort of… Oh, and so I said I felt guilty.
• 21:04
  Linda: And he said basic- something like, I don't wanna misquote him, but something like, this is what I heard, that, um, with, with guilt you have to… the constellation can't go any further.
• 21:15
  Linda: Um, I can't remember what else he said now, but it's like, I got so angry.
• 21:20
  Linda: 'Cause h- he's sitting there next to me and I'm just sitting there, and I'm just thinking to myself, "Well, why don't you finish it then?" Like, you know, why don't you finish the constellation?
• 21:28
  Linda: And, um, I can't remember what happened, but then something shifted and moved, and then there was a, another piece to the, a ending to the, to the, um, constellation.
• 21:40
  Linda: But just that feeling of being so angry that it got to that point, and that it was like nothing.
• 21:49
  Linda: He just sat there calm, chilled.
• 21:52
  Tracy: Did he explain to you why it wasn't, couldn't go any further?
• 21:56
  Linda: No, and I didn't ask.
• 21:57
  Linda: Well, it did, it ended up going further 'cause something, I think a representative spoke, and then it moved.
• 22:04
  Linda: But he didn't make a sound until that happened.
• 22:07
  Linda: So it was so powerful, like it was just incredible.
• 22:10
  Linda: Mm. And I think that might have been the one, yeah, something with indigenous people as well, and my eldest daughter and I came back and I did do a constellation with her, just ourselves, on that piece, which was incredible, like.
• 22:20
  Linda: So yeah.
• 22:21
  Linda: It, yeah, uh, it just, you don't know what's gonna show up.
• 22:23
  Linda: Mm. But I trust it implicitly.
• 22:25
  Linda: Whatever does show up, I trust it, that it's in the right order, that it's at the right time, and it's in the right field.
• 22:31
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 22:31
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 22:32
  Linda: Just seen too many times where you go, "Oh my gosh, didn't know that was coming."
• 22:39
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 22:39
  Tracy: If you, we knew it was coming, we might not have gone along, right?
• 22:43
  Tracy: But it's always- It's a bit
• 22:44
  Linda: addictive, don't you think?
• 22:46
  Tracy: Excuse me, I'm on the phone.
• 22:48
  Tracy: Excuse me For the listeners and the viewers, that's my dog.
• 22:52
  Tracy: Hey.
• 22:53
  Tracy: She's obviously hearing things.
• 22:55
  Tracy: And you might not be able to hear that 'cause Zoom is very good at cutting noises out.
• 22:59
  Linda: Oh, I can't hear it, no.
• 23:01
  Tracy: Oh, that's good.
• 23:02
  Linda: That's
• 23:02
  Tracy: good.
• 23:03
  Tracy: A bit distracting on my end 'cause I've got gongs in my room, and so she, when she barks, she barks and the gong reverberates back to her, so she hears it again.
• 23:14
  Tracy: And she's getting a bit on.
• 23:16
  Tracy: She's like, "There's another dog." Mm. Bark again.
• 23:19
  Tracy: That'll do.
• 23:20
  Tracy: Off you go.
• 23:21
  Tracy: I'm just gonna look at my… I've got a little list on my wall that I've started writing some things on to see, um, every now and then I lean into it.
• 23:29
  Tracy: What do you think in constellations or in the field makes love possible?
• 23:35
  Linda: Oh, wow.
• 23:36
  Linda: I think if we have deep compassion for those who came before us, and also acknowledgement of without those thousands of people that sit at our back, without them we wouldn't have this life.
• 23:52
  Linda: And I think the deep compassion and honoring that they did the best they could with what they had, because always it ends up with they don't want you to carry and suffer.
• 24:02
  Linda: They don't want that to happen.
• 24:04
  Tracy: Mm.
• 24:05
  Linda: So for me, it's abs- doing this work has absolutely intensified those feelings for myself, and I think it's true for trauma too.
• 24:13
  Linda: We can't heal from trauma if we don't have deep compassion for ourselves.
• 24:16
  Linda: 'Cause my memory- This is
• 24:17
  Tracy: true, yeah… Linda: and my memory of, you know, hated my guts and I'm just, you know, bad, bad connection with myself.
• 24:26
  Tracy: And I find that a lot with the people that are sitting opposite.
• 24:28
  Tracy: So it's like learning to have deep compassion opens some things, opens a space where the healing can actually happen.
• 24:37
  Tracy: And I just believe in trauma recovery, this is what I work with.
• 24:40
  Tracy: There's three major disconnects, the disconnect between self, others, and our environment.
• 24:44
  Tracy: If we connect deeply with the truth of who we are and not into what's happened to us, not living into that, we connect with the truth of who we are and, and most of us don't even know who the heck we are.
• 24:55
  Tracy: That's a bit of a journey.
• 24:57
  Tracy: Then our relationship with others and our environment change.
• 25:01
  Tracy: So just imagine if everybody were deeply connected to the truth of who they are, they are, and that's where they operated from, the world would look very different.
• 25:10
  Tracy: Oh, it so would.
• 25:12
  Tracy: You know?
• 25:12
  Tracy: Like, I'm, I'm just thinking of myself as an example, and there's been a really big movement recently for me on something that happened really early in my childhood that I just couldn't really get to the core of it.
• 25:27
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 25:27
  Tracy: It was a part of me that had obviously, like, really vowed and declared I was never gonna l- l- putting that bit away and I'm never looking at that again.
• 25:36
  Tracy: And that was, was almost like, um, regurgitating every time something would come up where it was around the self-love and the joy, and I'd be like, "Oh, joy, yeah.
• 25:46
  Tracy: Do you really deserve that?" Mm-hmm.
• 25:48
  Tracy: You know?
• 25:49
  Tracy: Like, underneath it all, even though I, I know and I've done so much work.
• 25:54
  Tracy: And then- this piece that I did, and it was s- such a simple piece of work, but it just, it was like that, you just dropped the coin into the slot and it's gone in the, into the right space.
• 26:10
  Linda: Nice.
• 26:10
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 26:11
  Tracy: And what it's done, when I think about those parts of me or, or even thinking into joy and love and connection, there's a depth to that now.
• 26:21
  Tracy: There's a… Things have moved.
• 26:25
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 26:25
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 26:26
  Tracy: And that's knowing that, that true essence of myself too, right?
• 26:31
  Linda: Yeah.
• 26:31
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 26:31
  Tracy: And, and you, you, you talked about not what happened to you, what-- that gets us stuck.
• 26:37
  Tracy: It really gets… Well, not for everyone, but you know.
• 26:40
  Tracy: That's where when the, what didn't happen to you, like what didn't happen when this other thing happened sort of thing.
• 26:48
  Linda: Yeah, yeah.
• 26:49
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 26:50
  Linda: I love that we have constellation work as a tool- Mm … to help those pieces come back into the whole.
• 26:58
  Tracy: Yes.
• 26:58
  Linda: When we're walking, when we do the, the stepping into the lineage of our life, that's a way we can als- alw- also check to see if there's any that this age needs.
• 27:08
  Linda: Is there anything that this age needs?
• 27:09
  Linda: Or we can just step and go, "At this point I need this," or, "At this point," whatever the thing is.
• 27:17
  Linda: It's a really powerful one, and people can just do that at home, just being-
• 27:20
  Tracy: Can you, can you talk more about that stepping into the lineage of your life?
• 27:24
  Linda: Hmm.
• 27:25
  Linda: So from the moment of conception, start there, um, we can take the steps and where things have happened to us, even if we don't know, like at really super young ages we might not know, but there's something in us that says something happened here.
• 27:42
  Linda: So then you can stay with that and just allow it to assimilate into your body.
• 27:46
  Linda: Yes, that happened at that age, I don't need to bring it forward.
• 27:50
  Linda: So that's where-
• 27:51
  Tracy: So kind of like digesting it there.
• 27:53
  Linda: Yeah.
• 27:54
  Tracy: Going into that timeline-
• 27:56
  Linda: Yeah… Tracy: and digesting that- and make- Yeah … it all pretty.
• 28:02
  Linda: Just- Yeah … I guess you're kind of saying yes to it.
• 28:05
  Linda: Yeah, 100%.
• 28:06
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 28:07
  Linda: Because it's happened.
• 28:08
  Linda: Yeah.
• 28:08
  Linda: So to deny it creates angst within the body 'cause it's not true.
• 28:12
  Tracy: Yes.
• 28:13
  Linda: And it shows up in other ways then, doesn't it?
• 28:17
  Tracy: It does
• 28:17
  Linda: Yeah
• 28:18
  Tracy: Yeah
• 28:19
  Linda: That's just one simple one that anyone who's listening can pr- play with that idea
• 28:24
  Tracy: Love
• 28:24
  Linda: it And I always invite people to just imagine, like, the vast number of people that come from their ba- And if we think about that, like, all you have to do is just remember your ancestral field, and they're there.
• 28:36
  Linda: Mm. You've got so much support.
• 28:38
  Linda: Yes, you may have memories of awful things that happened from your maybe immediate family and little bit outside of that ancestral field, but there's so much available in that energy that people could tap into, and it's just a matter of just remembering them, and they're there.
• 28:54
  Linda: Mm. But as a culture, we don't do… I'm not sure about you guys in New Zealand, but as a culture, we don't do our ancestors very well.
• 29:03
  Tracy: No.
• 29:04
  Tracy: Well, depends on where you are in the culture here.
• 29:07
  Linda: Yeah.
• 29:08
  Tracy: Um, some do, some don't.
• 29:10
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 29:11
  Tracy: I think things are shifting, though, for, for some countries.
• 29:14
  Tracy: Some cultures, it's a lot easier than others to shift it.
• 29:17
  Linda: For sure.
• 29:18
  Tracy: And I think- Well, my experience of, of the work here is that those that tend to be involved in it also have quite a, usually have quite a deep connection with Maori as well-
• 29:31
  Linda: Mm… Tracy: in some way, shape, or form, understanding the tikangas of the practices and, and seeing how it melts very well with the Maori worldview.
• 29:42
  Linda: So- Cool… Tracy: and then that allows Mm-hmm.
• 29:49
  Tracy: Because there is, yeah, that melding of cultures here.
• 29:54
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 29:54
  Linda: Mm. The other thing I wanna mention about constellation work is also the, the field of, like, the here and now, then you've got, like, a, a maybe a collective field.
• 30:06
  Linda: So it's a bigger field that we can access, and we need to do that.
• 30:09
  Linda: We so need to do that to be able to find some healing because everywhere we look, doesn't matter where you live, there's divide and conquer.
• 30:18
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 30:19
  Linda: There's the angst of them and us.
• 30:23
  Tracy: Mm.
• 30:23
  Linda: And just before COVID, the year before COVID, I started a, um, just a, a personal exploration into what it would take to have, um, healing between the White Australians and the Indigenous of this country.
• 30:40
  Linda: I
• 30:40
  Tracy: think I remember this.
• 30:41
  Linda: Yes.
• 30:42
  Linda: And, um, I had it recorded, like professionally recorded, and I was gonna do two years.
• 30:46
  Linda: I was gonna do a PhD at the uni, but I decided to just not do that and do my own version of that to collect the data, 'cause I just didn't feel it was the right space to, to do that.
• 30:56
  Linda: And, um, so I did once a month a constellation with some people who were interested in this, exploring it, and our focus was on the white people, not the Indigenous people, because our business is with the white people, and to stop doing to the Indigenous.
• 31:12
  Linda: So I was very clear around where we were looking.
• 31:16
  Linda: So looking in the ancestral field of the white people, and the first constellation, my gosh, so much anger, so much grief, so much, like, discomfort in the-
• 31:29
  Tracy: You got it or it was in the field?
• 31:31
  Linda: In the field.
• 31:32
  Linda: Right.
• 31:32
  Linda: And there were representatives, because they, I had a few people came with me on this journey, and I didn't get to do the second year 'cause, um, COVID hit and we weren't allowed and all the rest of it, so we pulled the pin.
• 31:42
  Linda: But I have still got that in- that information that I collected over that first 12 months.
• 31:47
  Linda: I'm not sure what's gonna happen with it, but yeah, maybe later on.
• 31:51
  Tracy: Isn't that what we did in- Sydney?
• 31:54
  Linda: Where I held a constellation.
• 31:56
  Linda: Yeah.
• 31:57
  Linda: We did a bit of that.
• 31:57
  Linda: Yes, yes, we did.
• 31:58
  Linda: And you were there- Little bit
• 31:58
  Tracy: around
• 31:58
  Linda: there too, didn't it?
• 31:59
  Linda: Right.
• 32:00
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 32:01
  Linda: Yeah.
• 32:01
  Tracy: Yeah, yeah.
• 32:02
  Tracy: And- I, I got to represent God.
• 32:04
  Linda: Of course you did.
• 32:05
  Tracy: I had no idea until M- Maria nudged me into the field.
• 32:10
  Linda: Yeah.
• 32:12
  Tracy: Interesting experience.
• 32:13
  Linda: But in that, you, did you notice how, um, how much time I took with each, like, next move?
• 32:22
  Tracy: Mm.
• 32:22
  Linda: Just gave it the space that it needs to actually be seen, be felt, be acknowledged.
• 32:28
  Tracy: Yeah, 'cause otherwise people feel this uncomfortableness, right?
• 32:32
  Tracy: And so when it's uncomfortable, people, we… And, you know, I've been guilty of this myself.
• 32:38
  Tracy: Let's just move this along a little bit.
• 32:40
  Tracy: Let's just-
• 32:41
  Linda: Yeah.
• 32:41
  Linda: Yeah
• 32:42
  Tracy: Um- And
• 32:42
  Linda: I remember Maria, she wa- she wanted to do something.
• 32:44
  Linda: I said, "Not yet." I spoke back to a teacher.
• 32:50
  Linda: It's so funny, but I just, I think-
• 32:52
  Tracy: Found your voice.
• 32:53
  Linda: Yeah.
• 32:54
  Linda: Zip, go.
• 32:54
  Linda: This is my space.
• 32:55
  Linda: I'm holding this space, you know?
• 32:57
  Linda: But it was just interesting, the desire to interject and- Mm … um, yeah, make it move.
• 33:05
  Linda: But that's not the reality.
• 33:07
  Linda: Mm. The reality is that we keep splitting ourselves.
• 33:09
  Linda: We can't come together yet.
• 33:11
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 33:11
  Tracy: Sometimes giving it that space to, just to be.
• 33:15
  Linda: To be.
• 33:16
  Linda: Mm. To be seen and acknowledged instead of trying to fix it and whatever else we try to cover it up with.
• 33:22
  Linda: It still looks the same underneath everything that we do.
• 33:25
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 33:26
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 33:27
  Tracy: Can't put a plaster on it, right?
• 33:29
  Tracy: We've got to actually look at it.
• 33:30
  Tracy: It's beautiful.
• 33:31
  Linda: Yes.
• 33:32
  Linda: I'm not sure where it's gonna head, but for now it's just lying quietly, waiting, I guess.
• 33:37
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 33:38
  Tracy: Well, and you've got your, um… What did you call your app?
• 33:41
  Linda: Oh, yes.
• 33:43
  Linda: The, um, a safe s- a safe place.
• 33:45
  Linda: A
• 33:45
  Tracy: safe- It's being
• 33:46
  Linda: developed… Tracy: place app.
• 33:47
  Linda: Yeah.
• 33:47
  Linda: Developing it.
• 33:48
  Linda: Yeah.
• 33:49
  Tracy: And all your trauma work.
• 33:51
  Linda: Yeah.
• 33:51
  Tracy: So correct me if I'm wrong.
• 33:53
  Tracy: You work in school?
• 33:55
  Linda: I've got a teacher aide job at, um, the Sanford Steiner School at the moment, near me.
• 34:01
  Linda: Um, as my business is morphing and changing, I'm just working at the school for a little bit.
• 34:06
  Linda: Yeah.
• 34:06
  Linda: Yeah, yeah.
• 34:07
  Linda: And, yeah, with the children that, um, may not be able to hold themselves in class all the time, so right up my alley.
• 34:13
  Linda: It's great.
• 34:15
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 34:15
  Tracy: Yeah, yeah.
• 34:16
  Linda: Yeah.
• 34:17
  Tracy: And then, and I suppose there wouldn't be much space for constellations and in group for little kids, although it's a co- constellation the whole time probably- … with a group full of kids.
• 34:27
  Linda: It's funny, I've done one.
• 34:28
  Linda: I found, you know those little, um, circles that you can use, and they've got the nose on it for the direction?
• 34:34
  Linda: That, that- Yeah.
• 34:35
  Linda: Yeah.
• 34:36
  Linda: I had a bag of those, and I found the other day.
• 34:37
  Linda: I thought, "Oh, they're there." And I thought, "Oh, I'll put them in my bag." Hilarious.
• 34:40
  Linda: Like, just hilarious.
• 34:42
  Linda: They'd been sitting there for, like, yonks, and ended up that day someone came and I said, "Well, we could constellate that," and I had my handy dandy little critters, little circles there ready to do the constellation.
• 34:53
  Linda: It was just so bizarre.
• 34:55
  Tracy: Are they one that looks like poker chips?
• 34:57
  Linda: Yeah.
• 34:58
  Linda: And on the, on one side, it's got like a round shape, and then like a, a, like a, a nose thing for the direction.
• 35:05
  Linda: So you put in whatever direction it- it's facing.
• 35:07
  Linda: Yeah.
• 35:08
  Linda: Oh, brilliant.
• 35:08
  Linda: I, that's the first time I've used them.
• 35:09
  Linda: It's hilarious.
• 35:10
  Linda: Like, that all came in that day.
• 35:12
  Linda: That's where I'm in a l- the field just works.
• 35:15
  Linda: It just, we just have to listen.
• 35:17
  Tracy: I don't know if it's the same thing, but Raquel Schulze, um, from Mexico uses something like that, and she has these pens that you can write on.
• 35:26
  Linda: Okay.
• 35:26
  Tracy: And then you can wipe, you can g- they'll come off eventually, but they're a special type of pen so that they stay on there long enough that you can move them around.
• 35:34
  Tracy: Not like a, a whiteboard marker where they thing, but- Yeah … I think you add water later and it'll come off.
• 35:41
  Tracy: Um, they're a great little tool.
• 35:43
  Linda: Yes.
• 35:44
  Linda: Yeah.
• 35:44
  Linda: And it just, it was just so funny that- That all happened that day and I happened to put them in my bag that day.
• 35:50
  Linda: It's like just m- most bizarre thing.
• 35:53
  Tracy: Well, you're listening to the field, aren't you?
• 35:55
  Linda: Yeah.
• 35:56
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 35:57
  Tracy: It's like me this morning.
• 35:58
  Tracy: I'm listening.
• 35:59
  Tracy: Woke up.
• 36:00
  Tracy: I, I had a very early call in Argentina this morning.
• 36:04
  Tracy: I was doing a, uh, teaching a class there with a group, an invited, um, facilitator.
• 36:10
  Tracy: And, and I knew that I wanted to do some, something creative with them and so I needed another camera.
• 36:16
  Tracy: So I put my phone.
• 36:18
  Tracy: I had it all set up so that I could just pop my phone in there and it would all… away it would go.
• 36:23
  Tracy: And then I woke up, and obviously I'd been working on it all night long,'cause I woke up this morning and it was like, "You can't use your phone.
• 36:32
  Tracy: You'll get a phone call." Oh, okay.
• 36:35
  Tracy: So I had to find another device.
• 36:36
  Tracy: This is what we're talking about being s- tech today.
• 36:39
  Tracy: And, and I did find another device and I had… and I managed to make it work anyway.
• 36:46
  Tracy: I got 10 phone calls during that time that I was on the call.
• 36:50
  Tracy: Luckily, I had the phone on silent.
• 36:52
  Tracy: I'm so glad that the field is, was able to share that information with me.
• 36:56
  Linda: Yeah.
• 36:57
  Linda: It does open up so much, doesn't it?
• 36:59
  Linda: It's just so funny.
• 37:00
  Linda: If, if we listen, you know.
• 37:02
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 37:03
  Tracy: How has constellations changed your worldview?
• 37:08
  Linda: I think it's had a massive impact, the potential of the world and how I see that, the potential that we have.
• 37:17
  Linda: I mean, this stuff should be absolutely everywhere.
• 37:20
  Linda: Constellation work should be everywhere.
• 37:22
  Linda: In schools, in the hospitals, in government.
• 37:25
  Linda: It, it should be everywhere.
• 37:27
  Tracy: It's interesting, isn't it?
• 37:28
  Tracy: 'Cause pe- 'cause people get-- Some people can get the wrong idea about it, and they might think that they can manipulate things, but the field isn't gonna let you do that.
• 37:37
  Tracy: There's no manipulating of it.
• 37:39
  Tracy: Oh, yes.
• 37:39
  Tracy: But I did have someone the other day who… And I s- was talking with them, and I-- And they had had some big stuff, and I s-said to them, "You know, that would be a really good thing to look at in constellation, and through a constellation.
• 37:52
  Tracy: Particularly in a workshop, then you could see it-
• 37:55
  Linda: Mm
• 37:55
  Tracy: on the outside, you know.
• 37:56
  Tracy: Like, you can witness your field," blah, blah, blah. And she says, "No, I know how it works.
• 38:02
  Tracy: I've heard all about it, and I couldn't do that to anyone else.
• 38:06
  Tracy: They take on all your stuff." It's like, oh, that's a really misinformed understanding of it.
• 38:12
  Linda: Yeah.
• 38:12
  Linda: Yeah.
• 38:13
  Tracy: It's-- In a way, it's a way of describing it.
• 38:15
  Tracy: Yes, people represent, but they don't take it on.
• 38:19
  Tracy: Um, and this person thought that other people would just take it from you, and then that was it.
• 38:25
  Tracy: You were fixed, sort of thing.
• 38:26
  Tracy: But yeah, so having, having that question of how do you describe it and what is it and, and getting that deeper understanding for people of, of how this works really.
• 38:37
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 38:38
  Linda: I did one.
• 38:38
  Linda: I, I've been going to, um, wellness, wellbeing expos this year that a friend of mine has organized.
• 38:45
  Linda: So there's been-- The third one's coming up, so it's been spread out over the year.
• 38:49
  Linda: Anyway, at the last one, I thought, "I'm gonna do c- I'm gonna do constellations.
• 38:53
  Linda: I'm just gonna go and see what happens and just see what, what, how it works out." So I planned to speak on constellations and give a bit of a demo.
• 39:01
  Linda: And in the morning, um, I was just talking to this man that was there, and he was talking about things in his family.
• 39:08
  Linda: I said, "You know what?
• 39:09
  Linda: I'm actually doing some work today, just doing an experiment with, you know, constellation work.
• 39:14
  Linda: This is k-kind of what it's like and da, da, da.
• 39:16
  Linda: Would you be interested in, you know, stepping up and exploring that?
• 39:19
  Linda: Anything you don't want to speak about, of course you don't.
• 39:21
  Linda: What-- You don't have to." So yeah, maybe.
• 39:25
  Linda: Yeah, yeah.
• 39:26
  Linda: Anyway, so I started speaking about it and I was talking to people, and I said, "I'm gonna do a constellation, and I'm just gonna invite anyone who has an interest in doing a short constellation just to put your hand up and we'll, we'll work with your system." Anyway, this man came forward.
• 39:43
  Linda: Like, no one else put their hand up, right?
• 39:45
  Linda: And this man came forward, and I don't remember- The
• 39:49
  Tracy: man that you'd been speaking to?
• 39:51
  Linda: Yes, the one earlier on.
• 39:52
  Linda: That's right.
• 39:53
  Linda: And, um, then I said, "I'm just gonna invite you all, if you have a sensation or something bubbles within you, just to come and find your place and just stand or sit, whatever you need to do in that place." So then people are sort of getting up, and sort of, you know that, that fa- that face that goes, "What the hell is going on?"" Tracy: I don't know why I'm Exactly.
• 40:19
  Linda: Yeah.
• 40:19
  Linda: And someone came and they were down on their knees on the floor just, you know, a little bit of a distance away from me.
• 40:24
  Linda: Someone else had to come and be on the other side of that person.
• 40:27
  Linda: And then there was, like, other movement that was happening.
• 40:30
  Linda: Anyway, wrapped it up, and the, the… It was a very short constellation of just one piece, and I think the piece that he got was exactly what he needed that day.
• 40:42
  Linda: Anyway, freed them all from the constellation, and this girl's looking at me, she says, "What just happened?" So I talked to her a bit about what just happened and, like, hooked already.
• 40:53
  Linda: Hooked with that whole experience, and there was quite a few others just going,"Oh my gosh, that's just, like, wow." So just, it is just an amazing, amazing gift to the world if we take it up.
• 41:04
  Linda: It really is.
• 41:06
  Tracy: I know for me, constellations made me understand- myself in a, in another way.
• 41:11
  Tracy: Like realizing that I was s- stepping into representation for people all the time- Yeah … without even… Unsolicited.
• 41:19
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 41:19
  Tracy: And, um, so I, I learned some really good boundaries.
• 41:23
  Tracy: Good job.
• 41:24
  Tracy: And, and you know, I think when we, when you actually have a, quite a traumatized field, when you have a lot of trauma in your field, then it's really, you're open.
• 41:33
  Tracy: Mm. You can be incredibly porous in your boundaries.
• 41:38
  Tracy: Mm. And so constellations taught me that.
• 41:41
  Tracy: Mm. And I have much better, um, handle on the boundaries.
• 41:44
  Linda: Good job.
• 41:45
  Linda: Yeah.
• 41:46
  Linda: Yeah.
• 41:47
  Linda: It's, it's just amazing, and I encourage anyone who's listening, if they get a chance, to go and have a go at it and just test it out for yourself, 'cause it's, I find it amazing, amazing healing tool.
• 41:59
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 41:59
  Tracy: Even going to a workshop and, and witnessing, right?
• 42:02
  Tracy: You don't even have to sit in the hot seat.
• 42:06
  Linda: No.
• 42:06
  Linda: That's right.
• 42:07
  Linda: No.
• 42:08
  Linda: I've got one coming up on the 11th of October.
• 42:11
  Linda: Another one coming up then, so I'll be putting that information out.
• 42:14
  Tracy: So where is that being held?
• 42:16
  Linda: Um, so I'm, I'm in near Brisbane, and it's at Brighton.
• 42:21
  Linda: That's the suburb where it's at.
• 42:23
  Tracy: Brighton.
• 42:24
  Linda: Mm-hmm.
• 42:24
  Tracy: Okay.
• 42:25
  Tracy: Brisbane, Brighton.
• 42:26
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 42:26
  Tracy: Peeps, you listening?
• 42:28
  Linda: Well, they can just… I'll send you my details and you can just pop them up there.
• 42:31
  Linda: And if anybody's interested in exploring anything, they can just contact me, if you like, Tracey.
• 42:35
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 42:35
  Tracy: That'd be great.
• 42:36
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 42:37
  Tracy: You've sent me through those details, so they'll come up online.
• 42:40
  Tracy: But- Mm … I always ask this question, well, I try to always ask this question, uh, because sometimes people, you know, like to hear how, how do I get in touch with her and so what's your website called?
• 42:53
  Linda: lindaconyard.com.
• 42:55
  Tracy: There you go.
• 42:56
  Tracy: You've heard it here.
• 42:57
  Tracy: Linda, lindaconyard.com.
• 42:59
  Tracy: Conyard,
• 42:59
  Linda: Y-A-R-D.
• 43:00
  Linda: Yep.
• 43:01
  Tracy: And how, um, you're on Facebook and Instagram?
• 43:05
  Linda: I'm on Facebook and LinkedIn, but I'm not very good at them.
• 43:08
  Linda: So my email is linda@lindaconyard.com.
• 43:12
  Linda: Shoot me an email and I can get in touch that way.
• 43:15
  Tracy: Okay.
• 43:15
  Linda: And I've also got, like, on my website, a 30-minute connect call.
• 43:19
  Linda: If people are interested more in what I do and what I offer, they can always book one of those.
• 43:24
  Tracy: Mm.
• 43:24
  Linda: There's no charge to that.
• 43:25
  Linda: It's just a 30-minute conversation just to see whether we connect or not.
• 43:29
  Tracy: Great.
• 43:30
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 43:31
  Tracy: Yeah, 'cause sometimes people have a question, right?
• 43:33
  Tracy: And they, they're not sure if it's the right thing to do.
• 43:35
  Tracy: Is this gonna work for constellation?
• 43:37
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 43:38
  Tracy: Have I got enough trauma?
• 43:40
  Linda: Then I would say, do you wanna carry whatever you have?
• 43:42
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 43:43
  Tracy: Just come as you are.
• 43:44
  Tracy: We'll help you out- Yeah … in some way, shape, or form, support you through it.
• 43:50
  Tracy: But there's a, there's another question sitting in there before we-
• 43:53
  Linda: Mm-hmm… Tracy: we close off.
• 43:54
  Linda: There's a whole lot of stuff spinning around in my head right now.
• 43:57
  Linda: But- Mm … the question hasn't, isn't popping through.
• 44:00
  Linda: But, uh, we'll leave that one to percolate.
• 44:02
  Linda: Yeah.
• 44:03
  Linda: I might just have to message you and ask you that q- uh, question.
• 44:06
  Linda: Whatever comes through.
• 44:07
  Linda: No problem.
• 44:07
  Linda: Yeah, no problem.
• 44:08
  Tracy: Mm. But I can feel it.
• 44:10
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 44:10
  Tracy: Uh, give it enough time- That it is for you… Linda: it'll end.
• 44:13
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 44:14
  Linda: Mm.
• 44:14
  Tracy: Thank you so much for, um- Thank you … agreeing to be part of this and- Yeah … sharing your wisdom.
• 44:20
  Tracy: And yeah, it's been fascinating.
• 44:22
  Linda: Really appreciate it.
• 44:23
  Linda: Thanks.
• 44:24
  Linda: It was lovely to connect.
• 44:24
  Linda: Good to see you again.
• 44:26
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 44:26
  Tracy: And, uh, anyone in the Brisbane area, the Brighton area, or further afield maybe?
• 44:32
  Linda: Yeah, north side of Brissie, yeah.
• 44:35
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 44:36
  Linda: But I mean, I have clients from everywhere, so if people are interested and they come from overseas, that's also fine.
• 44:41
  Linda: You know, c- can connect, so, you know.
• 44:44
  Tracy: Fantastic.
• 44:45
  Linda: Yeah, if there's an urge to, or a pull to come, come.
• 44:49
  Tracy: Thank you so much, Linda.
• 44:50
  Linda: No worries.
• 44:51
  Linda: Thanks, Tracey.
• 44:52
  Tracy: Thank you for listening.
• 44:54
  Tracy: Head over to Instagram and tell me what's resonated for you with this episode.
• 44:58
  Tracy: You'll find me @tracey.cartwright, that's Tracey with no E, .cartwright.
• 45:05
  Tracy: And, or head over to my website, traceycartwright.co.nz, and receive a free audio with a gift from your ancestors.
• 45:15
  Tracy: So until next time, be kind to yourself and have fun doing it