Latest / The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast / Almost Famous OGs: Mid Life Bachelor with JP Rosenbaum

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Almost Famous OGs: Mid Life Bachelor with JP Rosenbaum · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

0:00
Speaker 1: This is the almost famous podcast with iHeartRadio, almost famous
0:06
Speaker 1: the ogs.
0:07
Speaker 2: We're here, We're.
0:08
Speaker 3: Back, we are back. In a fact, we have a
0:13
Speaker 3: great og with us, my man JP.
0:15
Speaker 4: What's going on guys, JP?
0:17
Speaker 3: How are you, buddy? Thank you for joining us.
0:19
Speaker 4: You're very welcome. Thanks for inviting me. This is fun.
0:23
Speaker 3: It's so fun.
0:25
Speaker 1: We get the old we get the old schoolers together
0:27
Speaker 1: and we talk about, you know, walking up hill both
0:29
Speaker 1: ways to school and how things were tougher. You know,
0:33
Speaker 1: it's so much harder to find, you know, the perfect
0:36
Speaker 1: match with a rose back in the day, right kind
0:39
Speaker 1: of stuff.
0:39
Speaker 4: You gotta do it the old fashioned way, walk into
0:41
Speaker 4: a bar, meet somebody, or the end of a friend
0:45
Speaker 4: or come on good old days.
0:48
Speaker 3: It is kind of funny.
0:49
Speaker 1: I don't know about you, guys, but you know, when
0:51
Speaker 1: the whole app dating thing first came out, you know,
0:53
Speaker 1: and they were always talking about it, I'm like, dude,
0:56
Speaker 1: that's just it's ridiculous. Who would use an app to
0:59
Speaker 1: meet someone? And they're like, hey, dummy, you went on
1:02
Speaker 1: a TV show and handed out flowers?
1:04
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, there's that.
1:05
Speaker 1: Sorry, Like I did it the old fashioned way.
1:09
Speaker 3: Yeah, we have the old fashioned.
1:10
Speaker 2: Way now it's considered the old fashioned way. Back then,
1:14
Speaker 2: for sure, it was.
1:15
Speaker 3: Not a little bit of a renegade.
1:18
Speaker 2: So how is life, JP, what's up?
1:21
Speaker 4: Life is good? Life is it's pretty stable, and you know,
1:25
Speaker 4: obviously as you get older, it gets a little more
1:27
Speaker 4: this is the wrong word, but different, but a little
1:30
Speaker 4: more boring. I would say, you know, it's good. You know,
1:33
Speaker 4: like the kids kind of consume everything, and you know,
1:38
Speaker 4: you kind of make the most of the time that
1:40
Speaker 4: you have free, which if you were a divorced you
1:44
Speaker 4: have a little more time free than when you're married.
1:46
Speaker 4: But but either way, it's life is good. Like happy
1:50
Speaker 4: kids are happy. I'm happy where I'm in a good
1:53
Speaker 4: groove both socially and with work. And I don't know,
1:57
Speaker 4: I don't have much to complain about these days. Yay.
2:01
Speaker 2: And you're loving Miami.
2:03
Speaker 4: I'm liking Miami a lot. You know, this summer was
2:07
Speaker 4: nine years since we moved down.
2:10
Speaker 2: That's a long time.
2:11
Speaker 4: It is a long time, I hear it. The ten
2:12
Speaker 4: year mark is really where you start feeling like you're
2:14
Speaker 4: at home to this. But you know it, I still
2:20
Speaker 4: every time I go back up to New York and
2:22
Speaker 4: I'm in the city or I'm on Long Island. It
2:24
Speaker 4: still feels like home to me. My family, my extended
2:27
Speaker 4: family is still up there. So I love it down here.
2:30
Speaker 4: The quality of life is great. You know, Everyone's like, well,
2:34
Speaker 4: would you move? Would you move? And the short answer
2:37
Speaker 4: is yes, but I can't because the kids are here moving,
2:41
Speaker 4: so I'm not moving. So I am here for good
2:44
Speaker 4: and I am enjoying life. And it's you know, Miami
2:47
Speaker 4: in Florida in general is really a great quality of life,
2:50
Speaker 4: so no complaints.
2:51
Speaker 1: I love it down there. You know, about twenty years ago,
2:53
Speaker 1: I used to date in Miami heat dancer.
2:56
Speaker 3: Oh really, okay you yeah, isn't that interest?
2:59
Speaker 1: Wasn't it?
2:59
Speaker 3: Wasn't it you who he danced for Kris?
3:05
Speaker 4: Wasn't there just a reunion or something?
3:09
Speaker 1: Was?
3:11
Speaker 2: I got to dance it? It was so much fun.
3:14
Speaker 2: It was so intimidating because I'm fifty years old and
3:18
Speaker 2: I do not dance like ever, not like Ashley. Like
3:21
Speaker 2: I know Ashley goes to like, you know, kind of
3:24
Speaker 2: like dance classes at the gym. I didn't have that
3:27
Speaker 2: in Veil when we were living there, so like, I
3:30
Speaker 2: haven't danced in forever, and it was so much fun
3:35
Speaker 2: to be out on the court. Blakely came with me,
3:37
Speaker 2: my daughter and she got to meet all the girls
3:41
Speaker 2: and be on the court too, and it was.
3:43
Speaker 3: It was so fun.
3:45
Speaker 2: It's like Miami is We'll always have a special place
3:49
Speaker 2: in my heart just because I spent seven years there.
3:51
Speaker 2: But you know, it definitely is a unique place, I
3:59
Speaker 2: feel like, and so for me, it's good to like
4:03
Speaker 2: get there and visit.
4:06
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, you know, like constantly having to wick
4:09
Speaker 1: away the sweat because that's I'll tell you. The one
4:11
Speaker 1: thing about Miami is it is brutal hot sometimes, you know, right.
4:14
Speaker 2: And humid, the humidity.
4:16
Speaker 4: You know, everybody's always said the summers are so hot.
4:19
Speaker 4: The summers are so hot. And I got to tell you,
4:20
Speaker 4: for eight of the nine years, it never really bugged me.
4:24
Speaker 4: You know, you moved a condition. This is the past.
4:26
Speaker 4: Summer was brutal, though, really really bad.
4:31
Speaker 2: Lot are you.
4:34
Speaker 4: I go fishing as much as I possibly can, so
4:37
Speaker 4: I'm definitely on the water a lot. Yeah, you know,
4:41
Speaker 4: and you just kind of deal with it. It's just
4:44
Speaker 4: it's just a part of life. And come October November
4:47
Speaker 4: until April, you know, it's it's really gorgeous down here.
4:50
Speaker 2: Okay, I have to bring up the fact that on
4:53
Speaker 2: I think on a recent story that you shared, you
4:56
Speaker 2: were taking the kids somewhere maybe just see your family,
4:59
Speaker 2: and they were complaining. They were not complaining about the cold,
5:03
Speaker 2: but they were. They were freezing and it was like
5:05
Speaker 2: eighty degrees inside.
5:07
Speaker 4: I was up, Yeah, I was up in New York
5:09
Speaker 4: this weekend with the kids. And if it dips below
5:12
Speaker 4: eighty two, I mean I'm yeah, yeah, seventy eight for sure,
5:16
Speaker 4: but somewhere from the seventy eight to eighty two range.
5:19
Speaker 4: They are they're cold. They're just they're they're cold.
5:22
Speaker 2: You know.
5:22
Speaker 4: They're so funny and they really own.
5:26
Speaker 2: What happens.
5:27
Speaker 4: Remember the first time Ford saw felt snow, he was
5:31
Speaker 4: so excited and happy and it was fun, and then
5:33
Speaker 4: the cold hit him and he burst into tears.
5:38
Speaker 1: Well wait, so when obviously when everyone met you, obviously
5:42
Speaker 1: it was with Ashley and your season of the bacheler
5:45
Speaker 1: Atte and then you were living in New York at
5:46
Speaker 1: that time, right, so you both did you both start
5:50
Speaker 1: in New York? I thought you did, so.
5:52
Speaker 4: I was living and working in New York. Ashley at
5:56
Speaker 4: the time she went from her dental school at Penn
6:00
Speaker 4: to her pediatric dental residency, which was also in Philly.
6:05
Speaker 4: So we we moved. We were briefly in New York
6:08
Speaker 4: together when when we when we met, and then we
6:11
Speaker 4: moved to Jersey, which was halfway between my work and
6:14
Speaker 4: her residency. Lived there for two years, and we had
6:17
Speaker 4: the option to moved out of Miami for a minimum
6:21
Speaker 4: of four years at that time because I had a
6:23
Speaker 4: work a work opportunity, and we're like, if we don't
6:27
Speaker 4: like it, we'll come back, and so we moved and
6:30
Speaker 4: you know, nine plus years later, we're still here.
6:33
Speaker 3: That's crazy. So that was actually for you that I
6:35
Speaker 3: don't know why.
6:36
Speaker 1: In my mind I thought maybe that's where she was
6:38
Speaker 1: given an opportunity to practice or whatever. So that's that's
6:41
Speaker 1: really cool. It was so you basically were like, let's
6:44
Speaker 1: let's do this. And so then she started her practice there.
6:47
Speaker 4: Yeah. So she she had lived in Hawaii for a
6:51
Speaker 4: year and always knew she wanted to live in a
6:53
Speaker 4: warm climate, and so this was an opportunity where we
6:56
Speaker 4: could live in a warm climate where I didn't have
6:58
Speaker 4: to really change much with work, and she could work
7:01
Speaker 4: do what she does. Really, anywhere there's there's a need
7:04
Speaker 4: for for pediatric dentists. And you know, at the time
7:06
Speaker 4: she wasn't starting a practice, but she was joining one,
7:09
Speaker 4: and there's always a need. So it seemed like a
7:12
Speaker 4: good fit. And we weren't married to it. It was
7:15
Speaker 4: you know, four years and minimum for me and we
7:18
Speaker 4: could always have moved back.
7:19
Speaker 3: But yeah, that's awesome. That is awesome. And so the
7:23
Speaker 3: kids really only no living in Miami.
7:26
Speaker 4: That's it. Forty was born.
7:27
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, amazing. Where was he born? Which hospital?
7:32
Speaker 4: South Miami?
7:33
Speaker 2: So sorry I worked at a hospital, but he wouldn't
7:36
Speaker 2: have been at the hospital. I guess they don't deliver anyway.
7:40
Speaker 2: Uh so I have to ask, how is your health?
7:43
Speaker 2: I know you were diagnosed with giambiera de'ambre a while ago.
7:47
Speaker 2: How are you doing.
7:49
Speaker 4: Very I'm impressed you pronounced that the right way.
7:51
Speaker 3: I couldn't pronounce it. Yeah, she gets.
7:53
Speaker 4: Out now, you know. It was I was extraordinarily lucky
7:59
Speaker 4: where my case was diagnosed super fast. I was treated
8:04
Speaker 4: fast and they stopped the progression fast, which is really
8:08
Speaker 4: the key when it comes to that stuff. So my case,
8:10
Speaker 4: although you know, I spent two months trying to walk
8:13
Speaker 4: again in tie my shoes and button buttons and pt
8:16
Speaker 4: and ot and spent some time and you know, every
8:19
Speaker 4: day pretty much doing that stuff. There are stories where
8:22
Speaker 4: people stop breathing and they're on a ventilator for four
8:26
Speaker 4: months and they spend six months marking learning how to
8:28
Speaker 4: walk again. And so there I was on the I'm
8:31
Speaker 4: going to say easier end of the spectrum and super fortunate.
8:36
Speaker 4: But you know, there's no there's I'm back to normal.
8:40
Speaker 4: I mean I was pretty much back to normal within
8:42
Speaker 4: a couple of months. Yeah, And the odds of me
8:45
Speaker 4: getting it again are the same as me getting it
8:47
Speaker 4: in the first place.
8:48
Speaker 2: Oh, that's what I was going to ask. Is there
8:49
Speaker 2: any chance?
8:50
Speaker 1: Yeah?
8:51
Speaker 4: No, I think it's like one in one hundred and
8:52
Speaker 4: fifty two hundred thousand something like that.
8:54
Speaker 2: I don't do they do they know why you contract it?
8:56
Speaker 1: Not?
8:56
Speaker 3: Contract is a genetic Is it? Is it a genetic thing?
8:59
Speaker 4: There's nothing on genetics, they say. You know, generally it
9:04
Speaker 4: stems from your your your battling an illness the week before,
9:08
Speaker 4: and the antibodies that are fighting that that illness then
9:11
Speaker 4: turn on the nerves in your body. And I remember
9:14
Speaker 4: it vividly because the week before it was our anniversary
9:17
Speaker 4: and we were away, but like I was definitely ill
9:20
Speaker 4: with some sort of stomach bug and then a week
9:23
Speaker 4: later it happened.
9:24
Speaker 2: So, oh my gosh, that is so crazy. I didn't
9:27
Speaker 2: realize that about it.
9:29
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it's tied to like vaccines. I don't
9:33
Speaker 4: I don't know if there's any data on that, but
9:37
Speaker 4: but yeah, it's uh, it's crazy.
9:40
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm glad. I'm glad. So how is you know?
9:47
Speaker 2: Obviously we have to talk about the divorce because this
9:51
Speaker 2: is a Bachelor podcast and you guys, and I know
9:56
Speaker 2: that people are interested in kind of knowing your story.
10:00
Speaker 2: But how how are things with you? Do you guys?
10:04
Speaker 2: Are you? I know you're amazing co parents are you guys? Friends?
10:09
Speaker 2: Are you in touch other than like having to exchange
10:11
Speaker 2: the kids? How is life with you?
10:13
Speaker 4: Guys? Life is? Life is good. It's very stable. You know,
10:20
Speaker 4: she and I it's it's it's civil. We're friendly. There's
10:24
Speaker 4: no you know, there's you know, we don't hang out, right,
10:29
Speaker 4: it's not like we're friends, but but there's an open
10:33
Speaker 4: line of communication. We text or talk or some sort
10:37
Speaker 4: of communication almost every day. And yes it's all kid related,
10:41
Speaker 4: but you know, there's there's no resentment, there's no anger,
10:45
Speaker 4: there's no sort of you know, ill will uh. You
10:50
Speaker 4: know that actually took much longer for me to get
10:53
Speaker 4: past than than her, for sure. But the relationship is
10:59
Speaker 4: so and stable and friendly and fine, just fine. We're
11:04
Speaker 4: making it work.
11:06
Speaker 1: I said it when we had we had Ashley on,
11:08
Speaker 1: I actually said it. I was like, even if you
11:09
Speaker 1: want the divorce, divorce is still really hard, and so
11:12
Speaker 1: it's like, you know, going through it, you're still undoing
11:16
Speaker 1: a family to a certain degree in figuring out how
11:18
Speaker 1: to you know, everyone says co parent, but almost like
11:21
Speaker 1: co brand that family moving forward, like Okay, here's how
11:25
Speaker 1: we're going to try and do this, and it's never
11:27
Speaker 1: what it was. So it's always a challenge, I think,
11:30
Speaker 1: And you know, I mean I've been a divorce guy also,
11:32
Speaker 1: so I understand that feeling. Even though even though I
11:35
Speaker 1: knew it was the right thing, it wasn't necessarily something
11:37
Speaker 1: that I was all, you know, puppy dogs and ice
11:40
Speaker 1: cream about. You know, it takes time emotionally to get
11:42
Speaker 1: your life back, to get back in charge of your
11:45
Speaker 1: feelings about your life and about that person one hundred percent.
11:49
Speaker 4: I mean I think that I had a I can't
11:51
Speaker 4: speak for her, but I know I had it. Seemingly
11:54
Speaker 4: I had a much harder time with it post divorce
11:58
Speaker 4: than she did. I think, you know, in her mind,
12:01
Speaker 4: she she was there already like towards the end of
12:04
Speaker 4: the marriage, and for me, it was just I had
12:06
Speaker 4: I just had a really tough time, you know, for
12:08
Speaker 4: the following year, year and a half just accepting it. Yeah,
12:13
Speaker 4: not because I was still in love with her, just
12:14
Speaker 4: because you have this image of what you want your
12:16
Speaker 4: life and your marriage and your family to be and
12:19
Speaker 4: that gets shattered and it's like, is this really my
12:21
Speaker 4: new reality? And like this is not what I want?
12:24
Speaker 4: And so it's a constant battle, you know, and emotionally mentally,
12:31
Speaker 4: and it just took me. Took me a while to
12:33
Speaker 4: get to get past it.
12:35
Speaker 1: Well, I think I was gonna say, when you're in
12:37
Speaker 1: the public eye too, there's a little bit of at
12:40
Speaker 1: least I went through this embarrassment, you know, like I was.
12:43
Speaker 1: I don't know if it was I know it was
12:46
Speaker 1: self imposed. I mean, I know I was doing it
12:47
Speaker 1: to myself, but I was just like, oh my god,
12:49
Speaker 1: I've let all these people down or I've done all
12:51
Speaker 1: this kind of stuff. And I think, you know, I
12:53
Speaker 1: think people feel that even if they're not in the
12:54
Speaker 1: public eye.
12:55
Speaker 3: But it definitely is sort of amped up a little
12:58
Speaker 3: bit when you are you know.
12:59
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, we we've i mean, historically, we never
13:02
Speaker 4: really felt any pressure with that, you know. I think
13:05
Speaker 4: I think I was more I felt like I let
13:09
Speaker 4: myself down and I let my kids down, you know,
13:11
Speaker 4: like that I that I had that I grew up
13:14
Speaker 4: in this seemingly perfect, you know, four person family with
13:18
Speaker 4: my parents and my brother in the house and the
13:21
Speaker 4: you know, and and I felt like I ruined that
13:24
Speaker 4: for them initially, right, I don't feel that way now,
13:26
Speaker 4: but I felt like I ruined that for them, and
13:29
Speaker 4: and just accepting like is this it is?
13:31
Speaker 1: This?
13:31
Speaker 2: Is this?
13:31
Speaker 4: So now I'm that guy that's divorced and now I
13:34
Speaker 4: have two kids and looking for love again. It's just
13:37
Speaker 4: it felt very surreal, and I didn't accept it for
13:40
Speaker 4: a long time.
13:41
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, how how are the kids doing with it?
13:46
Speaker 4: There? They've always been great with it, you know. She
13:48
Speaker 4: we our process for divorce was very drawn out because
13:52
Speaker 4: we had we had made the decision right before COVID hit,
13:56
Speaker 4: and then well like, well, well, now what do we do.
14:00
Speaker 4: We're supposed to get divorced, but the kids are coming
14:02
Speaker 4: over from school, we sell the house like so there
14:04
Speaker 4: was so we had a drawn out process where I was,
14:07
Speaker 4: you know, living in the guest room, and then she
14:09
Speaker 4: moved I moved out, and we sold the house. So
14:12
Speaker 4: the whole divorce process was spread out over a year
14:15
Speaker 4: and a half, maybe more so the kids. Yeah, it
14:19
Speaker 4: was so the kids didn't see an abrupt uh, we're
14:22
Speaker 4: getting divorced, momb's moving out, and it was never like that.
14:25
Speaker 4: And plus they were also younger too, so yeah, they
14:28
Speaker 4: always handled it very very well. And now they know
14:31
Speaker 4: mom and dad are divorced and we split time and
14:33
Speaker 4: then there's there's split days, and so they know. They've
14:37
Speaker 4: always been accepting of it, which is one big, you know,
14:43
Speaker 4: level of release us.
14:45
Speaker 3: Yes, I said, I think that says a lot about
14:47
Speaker 3: you two as parents too. The I mean, you know,
14:49
Speaker 3: I can't it's.
14:50
Speaker 1: Probably I know it's never easy on anybody, but the
14:52
Speaker 1: way you two handle it and the way you two
14:54
Speaker 1: are with one another, I'm sure kind of trickles down,
14:57
Speaker 1: you know.
14:58
Speaker 3: They they see mom and dad being.
15:00
Speaker 1: Really good to one another and being carrying in sweet
15:02
Speaker 1: people which you both are, so I'm sure that probably
15:05
Speaker 1: helps a lot.
15:06
Speaker 3: You know.
15:06
Speaker 4: Yeah, we made certainly conscious efforts to not show emotion.
15:13
Speaker 4: I shouldn't say not your emotion, not if Ashley and
15:15
Speaker 4: I were disagreeing or felt a certain way. It never
15:19
Speaker 4: you know, it was never shown in front of the kids.
15:22
Speaker 4: It was always happy. This is the way it is.
15:26
Speaker 4: You love your mom, you love your dad, We love you.
15:28
Speaker 4: It's there was always. It was always full of love,
15:30
Speaker 4: and they wouldn't know any different, aside from the fact
15:33
Speaker 4: that we weren't living together right good.
15:46
Speaker 2: In terms of social media, Ashley came on and she
15:49
Speaker 2: talked about how afterwards she got a crap ton of
15:53
Speaker 2: haters coming at her. Did you get the same thing,
15:58
Speaker 2: like anything?
15:59
Speaker 4: Like, no, no, no, I mean it was relatively quiet
16:05
Speaker 4: post of Wars. You know, there was obviously the comments
16:07
Speaker 4: we're here for you. I'm sorry to hear that. I mean, yeah, stuff,
16:13
Speaker 4: I don't remember reading anything where like you. You know,
16:17
Speaker 4: maybe there was the occasional you ruined a marriage and
16:20
Speaker 4: you walked away from your kids, Like maybe there was
16:23
Speaker 4: one occasional one of those, but it's kind of.
16:24
Speaker 3: Yeah, blow it off.
16:25
Speaker 4: You don't really listen to it.
16:26
Speaker 3: Yeah, you take the get with the bad in those bads,
16:28
Speaker 3: but it was.
16:29
Speaker 4: Certainly not overwhelming. It's the point where I can't remember
16:32
Speaker 4: any of them. Yeah, I do remember all the positive,
16:36
Speaker 4: you know, the positive feedback that I got.
16:39
Speaker 2: Just are you a more like positive guy? Because I
16:42
Speaker 2: feel like Ashley and I are pretty very similar in
16:45
Speaker 2: the fact that we're pretty sensitive and like I, if
16:49
Speaker 2: I would get any kind of hate, like the one
16:52
Speaker 2: out of a hundred out of a thousand, I focus
16:55
Speaker 2: on that one. You know what I mean? Do you
16:58
Speaker 2: feel like if you if she got like one, like
17:02
Speaker 2: you were saying you might have gotten one, that she
17:05
Speaker 2: would have more focused on that and you were.
17:10
Speaker 4: Look, those can be overwhelming, right, You could get five
17:13
Speaker 4: out of five thousand, and all of a sudden you
17:15
Speaker 4: want to start responding to these people, and like they
17:18
Speaker 4: get you all amped up. They certainly get you more
17:20
Speaker 4: amped up than the positive ones. So sure, it's possible
17:23
Speaker 4: that there were a handful that made it seem like
17:26
Speaker 4: there were a lot. Look, I don't know, she didn't
17:28
Speaker 4: really share that with me at the time, so but yeah,
17:31
Speaker 4: you get that one that you really want respond to,
17:34
Speaker 4: is like, what's the point should I really respond, does
17:36
Speaker 4: it like you're just creating this unnecessary just stress. So
17:43
Speaker 4: so and I probably used to be like that, but
17:46
Speaker 4: but these days, like I just I just don't give
17:49
Speaker 4: a crap.
17:53
Speaker 1: I think you go through enough in life, right, you
17:55
Speaker 1: start prioritizing the someone sitting behind a keyboard just trying
17:59
Speaker 1: to get your you know you're going right.
18:02
Speaker 3: You're getting a more fuel if you respond, you know.
18:04
Speaker 2: Right, totally? Yeah, Okay, so dating are you dating?
18:10
Speaker 4: Uh? I'm not dating anyone at the moment, kay. You know,
18:16
Speaker 4: for I had a it's been a very interesting few
18:20
Speaker 4: years because I was not accepting mentally and emotionally of
18:24
Speaker 4: the divorce for for a while, and that certainly impacted
18:29
Speaker 4: my ability to connect with women, you know. I mean
18:31
Speaker 4: I remember just going out on dates just to go
18:35
Speaker 4: through the motions because like I needed it for me,
18:38
Speaker 4: you know. And and then I realized fairly quickly, like
18:42
Speaker 4: I'm not ready for anything like and so and also
18:46
Speaker 4: you know, not my twenties anymore either. So it's not
18:48
Speaker 4: like I'm just looking to go out and have fun,
18:51
Speaker 4: you know, Like that's that's because that's not what I
18:53
Speaker 4: That's not what I want either.
18:55
Speaker 2: So it's.
19:00
Speaker 4: Have to be careful, I mean, and you certainly can
19:02
Speaker 4: have a lot of fun, but not that I'm not
19:04
Speaker 4: having fun. But you know, I'm older, I know what
19:07
Speaker 4: I want. I'm not you know I'm not. But I
19:10
Speaker 4: was not in a place for a while to really
19:12
Speaker 4: get anywhere. And so, you know, for a good year
19:15
Speaker 4: year and a half, who knows, I just I couldn't
19:18
Speaker 4: connect Like I would meet women, I'd go out on dates,
19:20
Speaker 4: and but I just couldn't get there.
19:23
Speaker 1: Yeah.
19:24
Speaker 4: Now I'm just at a place where I have connected
19:28
Speaker 4: with women, and you know that there are there is potential,
19:33
Speaker 4: but it comes in ways, right like like there have
19:36
Speaker 4: been three, four or five months stints and then it
19:39
Speaker 4: it it either fizzles or dies for some reason. That
19:43
Speaker 4: makes a lot of sense, like oh, you're not sure
19:46
Speaker 4: if you want kids, and I want kids, and there's
19:48
Speaker 4: that whole and so but overall, I'm at least in
19:53
Speaker 4: a good place to date these days.
19:57
Speaker 2: Are you saying you want more kids?
19:59
Speaker 4: I am saying that, No, I don't. I feel like
20:05
Speaker 4: I tell I say the same thing to everyone. It's
20:07
Speaker 4: very difficult for me to put myself in a position of,
20:11
Speaker 4: oh my god, I'm in love with you. Of course
20:13
Speaker 4: you want to have a kid, Yes, let's have it,
20:15
Speaker 4: let's have a bait, Like I can't. I don't know
20:16
Speaker 4: what my brain and my heart will feel like in
20:19
Speaker 4: that moment. But I'm also but I'm not looking for
20:23
Speaker 4: a family, like I'm not looking.
20:25
Speaker 5: To have kids, right, right, So you know, and that
20:30
Speaker 5: answer is not really I mean, it's honest, but it's
20:33
Speaker 5: not really what a lot of women want to.
20:36
Speaker 4: Hear, like they want to be very popular on the
20:38
Speaker 4: same page, like I want to start a family or
20:40
Speaker 4: I like, I don't think I want that, But I
20:43
Speaker 4: can't tell you how I will feel in that moment.
20:46
Speaker 4: So I've had a handful that, like I just can't
20:48
Speaker 4: continue to see you because you're just not You're just
20:50
Speaker 4: not sure. And I'm like, I get it, you know, yeah, totally.
20:55
Speaker 3: It's such a it's such a different I would imagine.
20:57
Speaker 3: So I was JP, how old are you?
21:00
Speaker 4: Forty six?
21:01
Speaker 3: Okay, so I was.
21:02
Speaker 1: Forty What was I forty one when I got divorced
21:06
Speaker 1: or forty something like that? No, I was, I was
21:08
Speaker 1: younger than that anyway, I was really I'm fifty two. Yeah,
21:12
Speaker 1: I'm fifty two. The first thing that goes to the memory,
21:14
Speaker 1: but I remember I was probably late thirties when I
21:16
Speaker 1: got divorced, and I remember even then thinking to myself, like,
21:20
Speaker 1: you know, but I didn't have children at the time,
21:22
Speaker 1: and now that I do, if I put myself back
21:26
Speaker 1: in that place, like, oh, if I'm all of a
21:27
Speaker 1: sudden single with a couple of kids, I just don't
21:31
Speaker 1: know what. I don't know how I would react either.
21:32
Speaker 1: I feel like, you know, it's great that you're so
21:34
Speaker 1: mindful about it, though. I think that's a big part
21:36
Speaker 1: of it, right, is to know who you are and
21:37
Speaker 1: know what you want and you know.
21:39
Speaker 3: Be prepared to deal with however the chips fall.
21:42
Speaker 4: I suppose, Yeah, it's definitely limiting. But at the same time,
21:47
Speaker 4: you don't want to get involved with someone and spend three,
21:49
Speaker 4: four or five six months and then realize like, I'm
21:52
Speaker 4: still still don't want a kid and you still do
21:54
Speaker 4: and now you've just wasted six months and so so yeah,
21:57
Speaker 4: I mean, it's the only way to go these days.
21:59
Speaker 4: I don't know, I don't know any other way to
22:00
Speaker 4: do it. It would be a lot easier if I was,
22:02
Speaker 4: you know, twenty eight to thirty two, and even if
22:06
Speaker 4: I had a kid at that age or didn't like
22:09
Speaker 4: it'd be a lot easier, but it's it's founding. Yeah.
22:12
Speaker 2: Well, so we recently had Deanna on and we were
22:18
Speaker 2: her and I were at for me and her. How
22:21
Speaker 2: do you say that? Anyway?
22:23
Speaker 3: We were she and me and she and I? She
22:27
Speaker 3: and I and yeah, because you would say because I
22:30
Speaker 3: was at that.
22:30
Speaker 4: So yeahat take off the second one and how does
22:33
Speaker 4: it sound exactly?
22:34
Speaker 2: There you go for the English lesson? Boys. So we
22:40
Speaker 2: were just at the Mentel all for the current season
22:45
Speaker 2: of The Bachelorette, and we were joking with the producers
22:48
Speaker 2: and probably not just joking, it was probably a little
22:50
Speaker 2: bit serious on her part, but talking about since they're
22:54
Speaker 2: doing a Golden Bachelor, would they do a like midlife Bachelor?
22:58
Speaker 2: If they did, would you ever go back?
23:01
Speaker 3: Oh?
23:02
Speaker 4: Man, look, I don't close any doors, right, Like, Okay,
23:06
Speaker 4: it would be very difficult to say yes to something
23:09
Speaker 4: like that just because the logistics with the kids in
23:12
Speaker 4: my career, I don't know what that would look like.
23:15
Speaker 4: So just be like, no, I would never No, I
23:17
Speaker 4: can't say that, but like I don't it's not likely.
23:21
Speaker 4: I don't know how to make all that work. But
23:24
Speaker 4: you know, the old the older I get, the more
23:26
Speaker 4: I realize that you just like you live your life,
23:31
Speaker 4: have fun and make the most of it, because the
23:33
Speaker 4: older you get, the fewer opportunities there are to do
23:37
Speaker 4: things that are unique and fun. And so, you know,
23:39
Speaker 4: I look at my my parents that are getting older
23:41
Speaker 4: that they're a little restricted in what they can do,
23:43
Speaker 4: and so you know, I'm not going to say no,
23:46
Speaker 4: you know, but it's certainly not what I want. Right
23:53
Speaker 4: there were a couple of golden bats where jokes throw
23:56
Speaker 4: in my way by the way, just saying, oh.
23:58
Speaker 2: I'm sure I will you watch? Have you seen like promos?
24:03
Speaker 2: Will you watch? Do you watch it all?
24:05
Speaker 4: I haven't watched in years.
24:07
Speaker 2: I mean, that would be my guess. I feel like
24:08
Speaker 2: most of the people who are in our age don't
24:14
Speaker 2: necessarily watch these days if they've been part of the show.
24:16
Speaker 2: I just feel like it's harder to connect with the
24:19
Speaker 2: people who are in their twenties when you're in such
24:22
Speaker 2: a different place in your life. So that's why I'm
24:26
Speaker 2: excited about Gary season, you know, And I feel like
24:30
Speaker 2: I can relate more to the sixty year olds than
24:33
Speaker 2: I can twenty year olds.
24:35
Speaker 4: No, yeah, oh man, I hadn't thought about it. That
24:39
Speaker 4: way before.
24:40
Speaker 6: You're right, if I find myself with nothing to do
24:44
Speaker 6: on a Monday night and it's on, when I watch
24:46
Speaker 6: a little bit of it, maybe just out of curiosity,
24:49
Speaker 6: but certainly not setting my.
24:52
Speaker 4: TVR. What do they call these days? Yeah, right, recording.
24:58
Speaker 3: Just as a funny thrill back JP.
25:00
Speaker 1: So my my season of the my whole season of
25:03
Speaker 1: the Bachelor, and I think Trista when I was on
25:05
Speaker 1: Trista's season as well. My brother in law saved on
25:08
Speaker 1: his new fangled recording device back then called TiVo. But
25:13
Speaker 1: he's like, yeah, this is gonna be around forever. This
25:15
Speaker 1: thing's gonna be amazing. Well, when when my wife and
25:19
Speaker 1: I got together, she's like, well, I want to see
25:20
Speaker 1: your season because I was in high school, you know.
25:23
Speaker 1: So we put it on and we can't figure out
25:25
Speaker 1: how to hook it into a new like the new
25:27
Speaker 1: smart TVs. When we finally get one of the things
25:30
Speaker 1: plugged in, it's like in black and white, which she
25:32
Speaker 1: thought was great because she was like, you know, oh
25:35
Speaker 1: yeah back in your day, and I'm like, whatever, dude,
25:37
Speaker 1: it ended up being like.
25:38
Speaker 3: Just a disaster. So yeah, when you said DVR, its
25:41
Speaker 3: just triggered me because I'm like, oh yeah, I mean,
25:44
Speaker 3: what is it called? These days?
25:45
Speaker 4: You can't even get yours on YouTube, Like there's no one.
25:48
Speaker 1: I don't think so. I don't think they made mine
25:50
Speaker 1: into it. But I mean, I don't know.
25:51
Speaker 3: I don't know what happened there.
25:53
Speaker 2: I don't think so either. I'll get a clip from
25:56
Speaker 2: someone now and then, but I feel like it's like
25:58
Speaker 2: from Hulu or something. Yeah, that's funny, something like that.
26:03
Speaker 3: Somebody said they replayed my season not too long ago
26:05
Speaker 3: on Hulu.
26:08
Speaker 1: Yeah, right, but it doesn't live there, like you can't
26:10
Speaker 1: go there whatever you want to watch it.
26:12
Speaker 3: It's like, you know, appointment viewing.
26:14
Speaker 1: I think, right right, like in the communities down near
26:18
Speaker 1: Miami that are for the elderly folk, you know, like
26:20
Speaker 1: shuffle boards and oh crowd, you know, that's appointment viewing.
26:23
Speaker 4: I'm going to move up to Boca for that though.
26:26
Speaker 2: There you go there, you go, what grades are the
26:38
Speaker 2: kids in?
26:39
Speaker 4: They just started third and first?
26:41
Speaker 2: Oh so you got to you got a while before
26:43
Speaker 2: they're out of school.
26:45
Speaker 4: Yeah. Oh yeah. Their school only goes up to fifth grade,
26:48
Speaker 4: so they'll have to change schools going to middle school.
26:51
Speaker 4: But yeah, you know, I actually brought up to me
26:53
Speaker 4: the other day for the first time, would I ever
26:56
Speaker 4: consider moving a little bit further north in Florida, like
26:59
Speaker 4: up to you know, for Lauderdale, Boca del Rey. And
27:04
Speaker 4: you know, it's something that we've started talking about. Not
27:08
Speaker 4: that we have to move together, but no, that's an
27:11
Speaker 4: hour commute each direction. Yeah, we were both open to
27:15
Speaker 4: doing it, that maybe we would do it just to
27:17
Speaker 4: you know, get the kids in a little bit better
27:19
Speaker 4: of a school and a different quality, different cost of
27:21
Speaker 4: living up there. And so we'll see. Right now, we're
27:24
Speaker 4: sticking to stay in put, and.
27:26
Speaker 2: Your job is pretty secure. Like, didn't you just start
27:28
Speaker 2: I feel like you just posted too. Didn't you just
27:30
Speaker 2: start a new project?
27:31
Speaker 3: Oh?
27:31
Speaker 4: Yeah, but but my I do so I do real
27:34
Speaker 4: estate development in every different phase of a development. This
27:37
Speaker 4: just happens to be one that we broke ground on
27:39
Speaker 4: for the first time in a while.
27:40
Speaker 2: Oh got it.
27:41
Speaker 4: That's down in Miami. So yeah, I would have to
27:43
Speaker 4: come down to Miami to service some of my clients
27:45
Speaker 4: and some of my projects down here. But you know,
27:49
Speaker 4: people commute like Bocus as far north as I would go.
27:52
Speaker 4: But we just started talking about it. Who knows that
27:54
Speaker 4: it's going to happen.
27:55
Speaker 3: Yeah, I remember back in the show.
27:56
Speaker 1: You were construction management back then as well, so you yes,
28:00
Speaker 1: I stayed in that world, huh.
28:01
Speaker 2: I have.
28:01
Speaker 4: I flip flopped back and forth between the construction and
28:03
Speaker 4: the development side for for a while, and then I've
28:06
Speaker 4: just been on the development side for I don't know,
28:08
Speaker 4: ten twelve years at this point, maybe even more.
28:11
Speaker 3: Gotta be easier on the on the joints in the moment.
28:14
Speaker 4: Well, I was never I mean I was never.
28:17
Speaker 3: Never you were swinging a hammer.
28:18
Speaker 4: I wasn't swinging a hammer and stolen drywall, you know, plumbing. No,
28:23
Speaker 4: it was more the management role.
28:27
Speaker 3: That's good, that's good man.
28:28
Speaker 4: Yeah.
28:29
Speaker 2: So I'm curious to know if the fact that you
28:32
Speaker 2: were in the public eye do you feel like it
28:34
Speaker 2: played a part in your divorce at all? No, because
28:39
Speaker 2: you guys were pretty, i mean really pretty private, like
28:42
Speaker 2: I don't you weren't constantly on social.
28:44
Speaker 4: And yeah, yeah, you know, we went back to she
28:47
Speaker 4: went back to her career, I went back to mind,
28:49
Speaker 4: and you know, we would do obviously the occasional things,
28:51
Speaker 4: the promotions. We'd have fun and show the best parts
28:53
Speaker 4: of life on Instagram like everybody else generally does. Yeah,
28:58
Speaker 4: I'm sure she would say the same thing. But we know,
29:00
Speaker 4: ever felt any show or public pressure to stay together
29:04
Speaker 4: or not tell the truth or any of that. It
29:06
Speaker 4: didn't know, did you guys?
29:08
Speaker 2: Why Why am I blanking on this? I feel like
29:11
Speaker 2: we talked about it. Did you go on Celebrity boot
29:13
Speaker 2: Camp or yes, yes, that's what I thought. I was like,
29:17
Speaker 2: I feel like we probably talked about it before you
29:19
Speaker 2: went on, just to say, okay, if you do it,
29:22
Speaker 2: this is what you need to know going in.
29:25
Speaker 4: It was a money grab, like it was. Three weeks
29:27
Speaker 4: it would help, it would help pay off her loans.
29:29
Speaker 4: Like it was. It was a pure money grab, and
29:33
Speaker 4: we didn't have any or as seeming we didn't have
29:35
Speaker 4: any issues at the time, and we didn't even have
29:37
Speaker 4: We found out we were pregnant with sc while we
29:39
Speaker 4: were there filming.
29:41
Speaker 3: Oh no kidding, Oh my gosh, I didn't know that.
29:44
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, gosh, yeah, it was really fun. Wait did
29:48
Speaker 4: we find out we were pregnant or we found out No, sorry,
29:51
Speaker 4: we found out she was a girl when we were there.
29:52
Speaker 4: Oh god, she knew we were pregnant before we went
29:54
Speaker 4: on the show, which I don't think we were supposed
29:56
Speaker 4: to do and we did.
30:00
Speaker 2: Whatever. Yeah, so you don't feel like it played like
30:04
Speaker 2: any no.
30:04
Speaker 4: No, no, that that had nothing to do with that.
30:06
Speaker 4: That was pure like, well, if they're going to pay
30:07
Speaker 4: us this, we probably should just to consider it.
30:11
Speaker 2: Right, I can't Yeah, well, yeah, any opportunity like that.
30:15
Speaker 2: That's kind of how we were, even not knowing what
30:18
Speaker 2: it was going into it. I do feel like it had.
30:21
Speaker 2: They gave us a lot of great advice, you know.
30:23
Speaker 2: We came out of it with a couple of friends
30:26
Speaker 2: and some good advice. But other than that, it was
30:29
Speaker 2: kind of like.
30:30
Speaker 3: A vacation us.
30:36
Speaker 4: They passed the spectrum right, and we were at witty
30:39
Speaker 4: one end.
30:39
Speaker 6: Of the spectrum, you know, and then you can imagine
30:43
Speaker 6: the other end of the spectrum being not us.
30:46
Speaker 4: So I wouldn't say connected with anybody. And it was
30:50
Speaker 4: all so fast, like I could I don't remember. I mean,
30:52
Speaker 4: I couldn't tell you one lesson I learned from it.
30:55
Speaker 2: Oh gosh, okay, well it's all good ten years.
30:58
Speaker 4: Ago, eight years ago. I mean it's our really today.
31:01
Speaker 1: I say, first thing, it goes as the memory, guys,
31:05
Speaker 1: it's first thing.
31:06
Speaker 3: And the eyes it looks blurry in the background for
31:10
Speaker 3: all I always is okay, just make it sure. JP Man,
31:16
Speaker 3: thank you so.
31:17
Speaker 1: Much for joining us, and thanks for being a part
31:19
Speaker 1: of us with us, and great to catch up on
31:21
Speaker 1: where you're at in life. And I've always just thought
31:23
Speaker 1: I remember you and I met years and years ago
31:26
Speaker 1: at one of our Buddy Graham Buns things. He was
31:28
Speaker 1: doing down and down right in the heart of Manhattan.
31:31
Speaker 1: I remember walking away from that thing, going, God, that
31:33
Speaker 1: guy is just as awesome as I knew he'd be
31:35
Speaker 1: on TV. It was like, you're such assault of the
31:37
Speaker 1: earth guy. So it's great to hear that you're doing well.
31:39
Speaker 1: And I love that you and Ashley get along and
31:41
Speaker 1: are doing it right for the kids too.
31:42
Speaker 3: I think that's so important. So congrats on everything, buddy.
31:46
Speaker 4: Thanks and you guys are ever in Miami, Trista, did
31:48
Speaker 4: you get to connect with the Ashley when you were
31:50
Speaker 4: here or no.
31:51
Speaker 2: I did it. It was a pretty quick trip and
31:54
Speaker 2: I tried, but she obviously was working. Yeah, and actually
31:59
Speaker 2: I think she might have been traveling. Oh one more question,
32:03
Speaker 2: have you met have you met her boyfriends?
32:06
Speaker 4: I haven't.
32:07
Speaker 3: Actually almost got away from this.
32:09
Speaker 4: We don't have enough time for that. Unfortunately, we're at
32:12
Speaker 4: a time. What a shame. No, I haven't met him,
32:16
Speaker 4: but I hear good things and she's happy and that's
32:18
Speaker 4: all that matters.
32:19
Speaker 1: So okay, well, what a gentleman, and that's geez.
32:25
Speaker 3: We hold these time, these time things, we go hard
32:27
Speaker 3: on these.
32:27
Speaker 4: You should have led with that conversation. I don't know
32:30
Speaker 4: why you didn't. What a shame.
32:32
Speaker 1: You know. I'd love to have you back on and
32:33
Speaker 1: we'll shy to close, but that question.
32:36
Speaker 4: I'd be happy to And if you guys have ever
32:37
Speaker 4: gone to Miami, please please let me know.
32:40
Speaker 3: We will take care of yourself.
32:41
Speaker 2: JP talk by take care.
32:45
Speaker 1: God.
32:45
Speaker 3: I love that guy. They say that is he is
32:47
Speaker 3: such assault of the earth guy. I love it.
32:49
Speaker 2: Yeah, I totally agree. I remember times in New York
32:53
Speaker 2: with him too, and and with Ashley, I mean just
32:57
Speaker 2: getting together. Actually we got together for a Marria boot camp,
33:01
Speaker 2: like an event that they were doing, and I got
33:04
Speaker 2: to meet the kids when they were tiny, tiny, and
33:07
Speaker 2: just just I was heartbroken when they broke up.
33:11
Speaker 1: I was too that one for some reason, and I
33:14
Speaker 1: mean I had only met them a couple of times,
33:15
Speaker 1: but it really affected me. I remember going, oh, they've
33:18
Speaker 1: got to be just going through it and you know.
33:20
Speaker 1: I mean, but you know, I'm glad that they've come
33:22
Speaker 1: out the other end of it so well. I mean,
33:24
Speaker 1: obviously Ashly a few weeks back, she's doing great. JP's
33:27
Speaker 1: doing great. Sounds like the kids are doing great.
33:29
Speaker 3: So you know, there you go.
33:31
Speaker 2: I mean, I as a parent or a child of divorce,
33:35
Speaker 2: I feel like everything happens, you know, for a reason,
33:39
Speaker 2: and I'm I'm proud of them for, you know, being
33:45
Speaker 2: so great about it with each other, like just making
33:48
Speaker 2: sure that the kids are their priority. I feel like
33:50
Speaker 2: that's probably what I take away from how they co parent,
33:54
Speaker 2: Like you said, like the kids are they're everything, So yeah,
33:57
Speaker 2: I think they sure are important.
34:00
Speaker 3: Family first.
34:01
Speaker 1: Love it alright, you've been listening almost famous to OG's
34:05
Speaker 1: our podcast.
34:07
Speaker 3: I loved having JP on the show, and she's been
34:09
Speaker 3: Trista and he's been Bob. And we'll see you next time.
34:13
Speaker 2: Bye,