Latest / Cyber Go-To-Market Talk: The Cybersecurity Podcast About Cyber Sales, Marketing & Revenue Growth / 65: Stop asking rhetorical questions dressed up as coaching

Transcript

65: Stop asking rhetorical questions dressed up as coaching · Cyber Go-To-Market Talk: The Cybersecurity Podcast About Cyber Sales, Marketing & Revenue Growth

• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: You want to coach your team member, but you just know what they should be doing, and you're trying to coach them so you don't want to step in and just give them advice.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: Most of us in that situation offer advice dressed up as a question.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: Is that right or is it wrong?
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: Find out in this episode.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Bite-sized sales podcast, where we believe that you don't need to take time out of the field or off the phones, stuck in a classroom, in order to get great sales and sales leadership training, and that taking bite-sized steps each day to get better at your craft is the best way to improve your results.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: I am your host, Andrew Monahan, and I'm using my 20 plus years in B2B sales to bring you simple, actionable ideas that you can use every day to help you get better.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: Before we get to the tip for today, this episode is sponsored by Sales Bluebird.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: Most of us don't have time to keep up with the latest sales ideas and all the blogs, podcasts, and news articles every week.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: Sales Bluebird curates content from all these sources and gives you one thought from me, two quotes from others, and three sales leadership ideas once a week in your email inbox for free.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: Sign up right now at salesbluebird.com.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to episode 65 of the podcast.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: And this is the first one after refocusing a little bit around the first line sales leader.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: And one of the key things about being a great first line sales leader is your ability to truly coach your reps.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: And for anyone that's been in that role where you've been a coach or you're coaching your team, you'll know how difficult it is when you get in a situation where you're coaching through questioning, which is the absolute way to do it, and you know what the right answer is.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: You just know what they should be doing, you know what the next step should be.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: And this bug in your brain says you can't just tell them, you can't just tell them, don't give them advice yet, and you're resisting.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: But then how do you break out of that, right?
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: How do you kind of go through that to that situation so that you don't just drop into advice giving mode and being directive?
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: What many of us do, and I've been guilty of this before, is you do the the the question dressed up as advice, right?
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: And let me read directly from a book called The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: This is someone who you can just tell he's trained a whole bunch of people in a whole bunch of companies about how to be more coach-like in their interactions with their team.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: Very practical book, very real, right?
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: You read it and you go, Yep, yep, you know, I've been there, done that, right?
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: So let me read from the book.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_00: When Marlon Brando, his godfather cheeks full of cotton wool, made someone an offer he couldn't refuse, it meant he'd wake up with a horse's head at the bottom of his bed.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: You, of course, are a little more subtle about trying to get your way.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: You've taken on board that it's far better for someone if you give a little bit less advice and ask a few more questions.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: At the same time, in your heart, you're pretty sure you know the answer to the problem being discussed.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: So you've mastered the fake question.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: Have you thought of?
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: What about did you consider?
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: Stop offering advice with a question mark attached.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't count as asking a question.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: If you got an idea, wait.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: Ask and what else?
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: And you'll often find that the person comes up with the very idea that's burning a hole in your brain.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: And if she doesn't, then offer your idea as an idea, not disguised as a fake question.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: So that's read straight from the book, The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: And so what he's saying is, you know, go one way or the other, don't kind of fall into that weak middle, right?
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: So keep asking your questions.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: The great question he dropped in there, I hope you picked up, is and what else?
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: So you imagine you're in a situation where you know you're trying to encourage your rep to have a different approach or try something new, and there's one way you know is the way to go, then you hope they mention it.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: And you just say, Well, that's a good idea, and what else?
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: I like that idea too, and what else?
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_00: And you keep challenging them to think deeper to try and get to to more options.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: So that and what else question is actually in his book, he calls it the awe question, AWE, and what else.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: And it has an incredible uh value for us as first line leaders because it does stop you jumping in with advice, right?
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: And that's one of the big things that we all do at the start is jump in with advice too early.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: So if you just get in the habit of saying, and what else, and what else, and it's gonna help you a long way down the road of becoming a great coach leader.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: So, lessons from this be one or the other, don't sort of fall in the middle, don't you know do the lead super leading question that's gonna you know get them in the right area.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: You're devaluing your ability as a coach when you do that.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: Resist the urge to jump in, and then when you do jump in, maybe what you could do rather than dressing up as a question is saying something like, Look, I have an idea.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: Or as you were talking, something sprang to mind.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: So things like that, or maybe even if you got a story, one of the great ways, you know, beyond asking questions, is by telling stories when you're becoming a coach.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: If you got something in the back of your brain from a previous experience, you know, maybe you bring that out as the way to kind of direct the conversation down that way.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: So, action for you from this.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: First of all, catch yourself when you do it.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_00: If you do do it, stop yourself, don't let yourself do it again, and then challenge yourself to be black or white.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_00: Either you ask questions or you give advice or you give ideas.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: Don't fall in the middle by asking those BS questions.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: If you like this podcast, the most useful thing you could do to support it is share it with just one person.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: It will mean the world to me, but more importantly, for that one person, it may well transform how they lead and also their results in the coming quarters and years.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: It will take you just 20 seconds.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: All you have to do is click the share icon in your podcast ad and follow the promise.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: Also, I need your suggestions, please.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: If you have a topic you want me to cover or just want to get in touch, simply email me at upside at unstoppable.do.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: That's upside at unstoppable.do.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: And now to wrap up this episode, training without implementation is just entertainment.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_00: So if you heard something today that you want to use, take action right now and keep getting better every single day.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: And finally, I'm signing off as the great Joe Sexton would by saying, gone to sell.