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I'd Rather Be Set on Fire · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

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  Speaker 1: I'd rather be lit on fire. It's one more thing.
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  Speaker 1: I'm strong and getty. One more thing then what you're
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  Speaker 1: probably wondering, then do that stack of paperwork I've got
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  Speaker 1: sitting on my counter in my kitchen. Oh, I don't
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  Speaker 1: know why that is. I wish I was one of
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  Speaker 1: those people. I wish I was married to one of
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  Speaker 1: those people that, Oh they love that challenge. Oh, I
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  Speaker 1: can't wait to tear into that, start knocking those off,
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  Speaker 1: checking those boxes, getting that taken care of. I've known
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  Speaker 1: people like that. What a great way to go through life.
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  Speaker 1: If you're one of those people that you look at
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  Speaker 1: a stack of paperwork or a cluttered room and just think,
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  Speaker 1: oh my god, I can't wait to get started. You
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  Speaker 1: get you're obviously built different than me, and I don't.
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  Speaker 1: It's not a character thing, I don't think.
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  Speaker 2: Are there people who revel in it?
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  Speaker 1: Oh? Absolutely, I've done several, done several just oh. Think
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  Speaker 1: it's such a feeling of accomplishment of tearing into that
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  Speaker 1: stuff and getting it done.
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  Speaker 2: Huh.
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  Speaker 1: And I dread it so much anyway. The reason I
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  Speaker 1: brought this up and particular stuff, if you told me
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  Speaker 1: on a Sunday morning, need you to dig a hole
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  Speaker 1: ten feet by ten feet by five feet. I think, well,
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  Speaker 1: I'd rather not, But okay, you tell me I got
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  Speaker 1: to do that stack of paperwork. I'm gonna fake an
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  Speaker 1: illness or step in front of a bus or anything
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  Speaker 1: I've got to do to get out of that for
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  Speaker 1: whatever reason. Anyway, The Washington Post with a piece today
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  Speaker 1: the secret to making chores so fun that you look
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  Speaker 1: forward to them, Strategies to getting things you don't want.
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  Speaker 2: To do done, Yes, please, And.
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  Speaker 1: They go through a bunch of them. Some of them
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  Speaker 1: are pretty decent, some of them seem pretty stupid to me.
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  Speaker 1: It's called gamification, and it's exactly what it sounds like,
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  Speaker 1: making those often dreaded tasks of daily life into a
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  Speaker 1: game that comes close to resembling actual fun. And we
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  Speaker 1: rounded up some of the best examples out there. This
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  Speaker 1: one I wouldn't do in my current lifestyle, but I
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  Speaker 1: could see it being a thing back when I was single,
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  Speaker 1: particularly administration night parties. When I first thought that, I
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  Speaker 1: saw that, I thought that's dumb. But this writer said,
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  Speaker 1: administration night party is the lamest party ever. It sounds like,
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  Speaker 1: but it adds a dad of dash of.
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  Speaker 2: Slow down.
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  Speaker 1: It adds a dash of social fund to tedious but
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  Speaker 1: unavoidable tasks of paying bills filling out school forms. I
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  Speaker 1: got a bunch of those to do today. That's what's
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  Speaker 1: on my mind doing this. I got enrollment stuff. It's
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  Speaker 1: just like, why we've been at the school for years.
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  Speaker 1: You know who I am, you know where we are,
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  Speaker 1: you know the do you know all of this stuff?
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  Speaker 1: Why do I have to fill all this out again?
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  Speaker 2: Oh my god?
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  Speaker 1: Anyway, anyway back to this, him and his friends came
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  Speaker 1: up with this idea of administration parties and they would
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  Speaker 1: get some beer and they would meet at somebody's house
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  Speaker 1: and they'd drink beer and talk while they went through
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  Speaker 1: all the stuff. And it turned into something that everybody
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  Speaker 1: enjoys and they do once a week or once a
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  Speaker 1: month or whatever's going on.
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  Speaker 2: That's pretty good.
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  Speaker 1: I could actually see that.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, look, we're gonna do paperwork for an hour and
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  Speaker 3: a half. We can shoot the ship while we do
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  Speaker 3: it and have a couple of bruise and then we'll
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  Speaker 3: do something fun.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah. Wow, Wow, that's clever.
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  Speaker 1: This one I'd never thought of. I don't know if
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  Speaker 1: I'll ever think of it again. The poop rule hmm.
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  Speaker 1: People have trouble getting rid of things, throwing things out
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  Speaker 1: when decluttering.
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  Speaker 2: Oh that's me yep.
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  Speaker 1: Ask yourself if this item was covered in poop, would
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  Speaker 1: I still keep it?
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  Speaker 2: Wow? That's creative.
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  Speaker 1: Behave is to simplify the decision making process. Obviously, the
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  Speaker 1: poop rule helps you decide whether it's something you really
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  Speaker 1: need to keep. Her mind, there's not a lot i'd
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  Speaker 1: keep with poop on it. Well, your spare set of
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  Speaker 1: car keys, you'd clean the poop off and keep them.
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  Speaker 2: Right right, right right.
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  Speaker 3: I'm trying to I'm willing to entertain this notion since
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  Speaker 3: the first one was so good. Oh gosh, Cause it's clothes.
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  Speaker 3: I you know, I'm really bad at Look. I got
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  Speaker 3: this long sleeved golf shirt. I haven't worn it in
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  Speaker 3: five years. Why do I still on it? Well, it
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  Speaker 3: might come in handy if But clothes covered with excrement
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  Speaker 3: is a different, different question than.
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  Speaker 1: I feel like I would get hung up on who
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  Speaker 1: came into my house and pooped in my T shirt drawer.
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  Speaker 1: I feel like we need to get the ring cam
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  Speaker 1: data and figure this out before we worry about decluttering.
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  Speaker 3: We simply save simply Safe dot Com slish Armstrong.
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  Speaker 1: We have a bigger problem on our hands than a
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  Speaker 1: little clutter around the house. Somebody came into the house
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  Speaker 1: and pooped in my T shirt drawer.
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  Speaker 3: The point is not the T shirt.
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  Speaker 1: There's some sort of rogue shitter hitter home.
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  Speaker 2: Oh sleep my god.
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  Speaker 1: Anyway, this one's less fun and would just not work
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  Speaker 1: on me. Points system assigned points to yours based on
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  Speaker 1: difficulty to see who can get the most points. Making
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  Speaker 1: the bed might be one point. Emptying the dishwasher might
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  Speaker 1: be three. I actually they could be the other way around.
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  Speaker 1: I hate making the bed. Well, do I have a
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  Speaker 1: fitted sheet to put on it? Making the bed? I'm
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  Speaker 1: fine starting with no sheets on the bed at all,
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  Speaker 1: including getting that fitted sheet on there.
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  Speaker 2: I'd rather fight a chimp.
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  Speaker 3: Oh man, Oh, it just takes a long then it
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  Speaker 3: doesn't fit.
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  Speaker 1: Right anyway, and then you have prizes for the end
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  Speaker 1: or your reward. It is a dumb One time to
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  Speaker 1: challenge is this is not a bad idea. I've actually
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  Speaker 1: kind of done this before the ten minute tidy or
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  Speaker 1: whatever time how long, I'm only gonna do this for
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  Speaker 1: fifteen minutes. I'm gonna do paperwork for fifteen minutes. And
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  Speaker 1: then I'm gonna stop. What happens almost always is if
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  Speaker 1: you can get going, because if you're a certain sort
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  Speaker 1: of person, the getting going is the whole ball game.
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  Speaker 1: Once you get going, you blow past the time and
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  Speaker 1: you keep going. But for some reason, it's your trick
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  Speaker 1: in the mind because the getting started. I don't know
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  Speaker 1: what personality type that is, but I've got it like
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  Speaker 1: as bad as anybody has ever had it on earth.
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  Speaker 1: The getting started geez.
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  Speaker 3: Well, right, And it can be like positive stuff too,
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  Speaker 3: whether it's going to the gym, which is arguably positive
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  Speaker 3: that Look, I'm going to go in there for five minutes,
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  Speaker 3: and if I'm not digging it, I'm going to go
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  Speaker 3: home again or stop working out or whatever. I do
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  Speaker 3: that For writing, I know I should write. But what's
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  Speaker 3: the opposite of a journey of a thousand miles begins
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  Speaker 3: with a single step. There's a personality type that I'm
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  Speaker 3: more than familiar with that all that you can see
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  Speaker 3: is the thousand miles, and those first steps seem like
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  Speaker 3: too much to ask. But yeah, if I say, all right,
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  Speaker 3: I'm going to sit down and write for five minutes,
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  Speaker 3: it always turns into a lot more than that.
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  Speaker 1: I wish here was the paperwork equivalent of this. One
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  Speaker 1: of the reasons that I'm able to get to the
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  Speaker 1: gym practically every day is that it's just the perfect
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  Speaker 1: distance from my house and I can make myself walk there,
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  Speaker 1: and there's something about walking there and gets my blood
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  Speaker 1: flowing and everything like that. By the time I get there,
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  Speaker 1: I have no problem being motivated to do it, whereas
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  Speaker 1: if I drove there, I might sit in my car
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  Speaker 1: and think not today and go home. But I wish
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  Speaker 1: there was a paperwork equivalent of that that kind of
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  Speaker 1: got you warmed up and your brain going to where
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  Speaker 1: it's fine.
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  Speaker 2: But I don't know what that would be.
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  Speaker 3: Oh you just warm up by filling out your name
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  Speaker 3: and address twice and then you're write down your phone
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  Speaker 3: number once.
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  Speaker 1: And oh man, yeah, there we go. I don't know
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  Speaker 1: why those tax forms. I don't know why AI hasn't
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  Speaker 1: taken care of this, and maybe it hasn't for you
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  Speaker 1: smarter people. Why I ever have to type my name, address,
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  Speaker 1: phone number or anything into anything ever again in my life?
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  Speaker 1: It is amazing to me my computer, how many times
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  Speaker 1: have I typed my address into my phone? A million times?
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  Speaker 1: How is it not have that stored somewhere and we'll
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  Speaker 1: always fill it into everything. Some sites are set up
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  Speaker 1: for that, but not all of them. I just I
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  Speaker 1: don't understand how we haven't gotten there yet.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, you have to deal with more crap like that
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  Speaker 3: than me because your kids are still kids. But yeah,
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  Speaker 3: the auto fill my address and phone number happens pretty
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  Speaker 3: automatically with most things I deal with.
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  Speaker 1: Not enough, not enough. It should all be filled in
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  Speaker 1: all the time.
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  Speaker 3: But an institution that already knows who you are, including
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  Speaker 3: the government. We've talked about this before. There are like
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  Speaker 3: seven different departments of the federal government that have every
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  Speaker 3: bit of information that's humanly available. Why are you asking
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  Speaker 3: me to give it to you for the eighth time.
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  Speaker 2: What kind of a system is that? Right?
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, almost anything that involves a government, which your public
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  Speaker 1: school is. Can I just write the same as the
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  Speaker 1: last eight times you ask me for who the doctor
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  Speaker 1: is and the address and the phone number for the hospital.
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  Speaker 1: What anyway? And then finally another dumb one in my mind,
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  Speaker 1: apps that gamified chores. There are a bunch of different
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  Speaker 1: apps out there. Hubiteka, habit Hunter, and Nipto help organize
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  Speaker 1: household chores, Family Task and personal goals, and an easy
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  Speaker 1: to use app that lend structure rewards, and yes, can
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  Speaker 1: make jobs that are seem like drudgery into fun. I'm
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  Speaker 1: guessing that wouldn't work on me. The first two I
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  Speaker 1: like the best.
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  Speaker 2: I like the.
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  Speaker 1: Getting together and kind of making a party out of
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  Speaker 1: the paperwork. I could see doing that. And then I'm
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  Speaker 1: going to go around my house pooping on things I
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  Speaker 1: want to get rid of because that I wasn't paying attention.
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  Speaker 1: Is that what it was all about?
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  Speaker 2: Well, that helps make it more real.
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  Speaker 3: I think, you know, I'm just having so much difficulty
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  Speaker 3: picturing this old golf trophy with feces all over it.
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  Speaker 1: Let me, it's a It's one of those things that
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  Speaker 1: if you're the sort of person that this stuff isn't
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  Speaker 1: hard for, you don't understand why you just don't get
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  Speaker 1: off your ass and do it. You're lazy. If you're
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  Speaker 1: the sort of person that it's easy for, you don't
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  Speaker 1: understand what sort of weird mental block it is for
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  Speaker 1: some of us.
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  Speaker 3: And if I got like points for various you know,
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  Speaker 3: check boxes being checked and if they're you know, I
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  Speaker 3: got like ten points, I got a like nice bottle
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  Speaker 3: of Scotch or something like that. I could see thinking, oh, shoot,
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  Speaker 3: if I just clean out to this and file to that.
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  Speaker 2: I'll get my bottle, but just go buy it.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, well that is the example they actually used on
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  Speaker 1: that one, the points system. If it's for yourself, something
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  Speaker 1: you know of a medium or small price that you've
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  Speaker 1: been wanting to buy, make the rule in your own
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  Speaker 1: mind if I get this room cleaned out, then I
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  Speaker 1: will buy X.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: You can freak yourself that way. Fantastic. I wonder I
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  Speaker 1: have spent my entire adult life with paperwork that I
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  Speaker 1: needed to get done, and I admire people that I've known.
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  Speaker 1: I've been in relationships with women, for instance, that always
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  Speaker 1: have all their paperwork done, and so you get new
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  Speaker 1: stuff coming to mail, but they get that done, so
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  Speaker 1: they never have anything. I've always had stuff that needs
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  Speaker 1: to be done, and I wonder, iful, on my deathbed,
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  Speaker 1: I'm gonna think, why didn't you at some point just
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  Speaker 1: get it done so you could have a day, a week,
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  Speaker 1: a month where you didn't have this hanging over your
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  Speaker 1: head instead of spending your entire freaking life thinking about
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  Speaker 1: this shit. I am going to wonder that on my deathbed.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, bottom line at Michael, I think my favorite golf shoes,
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  Speaker 3: I would go ahead and have cleaned my favorite cereal bowl.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, probably not.
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  Speaker 1: Well, something do you eat off of my high school diploma?
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: I probably don't need to clean the LEAs.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, cereal bowls are cheap at Target, Joe, you can
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  Speaker 3: get those.
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  Speaker 1: You know. In fact, I might go home and crap
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  Speaker 1: on my high school diploma. Well, I guess that's it.