Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / How do narcissists deal with Stress?
Transcript
- 0:00What is going on beautiful people?
- 0:02Welcome to another episode of the Narcissist Code.
- 0:04I'm your favorite. Your favorite selfaware
- 0:07narcissist Mr. Lee Hammett better known as mental illness
- 0:10across all social media platform.
- 0:12This is your first time seeing my face or hearing my lovely
- 0:14voice. I'm a clinically diagnosed
- 0:16narcissist and I use my platform on social media to raise
- 0:18awareness for NPD. Get more people in the therapy
- 0:20like myself, six years strong. It also validate the victim,
- 0:23survivors and thrivers of said disorder.
- 0:26Said toxic people said toxic traits.
- 0:28Today's episode is going to be about what happens when a
- 0:31narcissist is stressed, stressed out, stressed, stressful
- 0:36situations. How do I How do narcissists How
- 0:38do some narcissists handle stress?
- 0:41Before you hop in today's episode y'all I got to shout out
- 0:43the self love brand. This is the I Love me brand.
- 0:46I'm grateful. Help represent your your journey
- 0:49on your self love and healing journey.
- 0:51Y'all the link is in the description of every video and
- 0:53podcast that I do. Had to get out the way.
- 0:56Y'all but seriously, how do narcissists react when they are
- 1:00stressed? And that was a it was nervous,
- 1:04nervous, nervous laughter right there.
- 1:06Y'all because I think that everybody understands that if
- 1:09you're dealt, if you've ever dealt with a narcissistic
- 1:11person, they we do not handle the stress well at all.
- 1:17Oh my goodness. When a narcissist is stressed,
- 1:22everybody around that narcissist is also going to be stressed.
- 1:26It's just like a stress everybody.
- 1:28It's like a imagine a narcissist with their arms spread wide like
- 1:33this, this, this standard. If you were to listen to this on
- 1:36the podcast, you'll just stand straight up, spread your arms
- 1:39like, raise your arms to show the level and start spinning
- 1:43like a childish toxic ass. Little hurricane just starts
- 1:47spinning like a toxic tornado. Everybody in this little
- 1:50spinning, narcissistic nuclear radius gets hit.
- 1:54You going to fill it? Y'all.
- 1:55If I am stressed, everybody else is going to be stressed.
- 2:01Is this how it is? Narcissistic people, Most of us
- 2:04don't know how to process stress and deal with stress.
- 2:07Well, that's one of these, these these emotional states that we
- 2:10do not handle well, one among many that we do not handle well.
- 2:15So if you get caught up with a narcissistic person, this is how
- 2:18it's going to go. A lot of times you're going to
- 2:20be in a very stressful situation dealing with a toxic,
- 2:23narcissistic person that is out there to try to get you.
- 2:26You're like, if I'm stressed, you're stressed.
- 2:29I don't. Look, it gets to the point where
- 2:30you if you could be in the best mood of your life and you bring
- 2:36some good news to their nurses and they if they are feeling a
- 2:39little bit of stress, a little bit of pressure, they're going
- 2:45to put it onto you. They're going to project that
- 2:47stress and pressure onto you are going to feel it.
- 2:50I promise you that you will. You are going to, you absolutely
- 2:55going to fill it in this situation you don't get why do
- 2:58you get to be happy and then they're stress free.
- 3:01When I got to sit around here and be just stressed the hell
- 3:03out, why do you get to feel it this way?
- 3:05That's how a lot of narcissists in people's minds work.
- 3:08Like it's not fair that you don't have to feel distressed
- 3:11and I do. So I'm going to take it out on
- 3:13you. They don't handle stress well.
- 3:15If they if they, you can tell too.
- 3:16Y'all you like. If you build with a narcissist
- 3:19or tax person for an extended period of time, for any, for any
- 3:22period of time, you know you can.
- 3:24It's like you get good at reading you to survive.
- 3:27What a narcissist. You have to get good at reading
- 3:29their energy, sometimes reading their just reading their mood,
- 3:32right? You know, and you can tell when
- 3:36something is going on without without them even saying
- 3:39anything to you. Like if you haven't done
- 3:41anything to them and you can just feel their moods kind of
- 3:44shifting, like they're just acting kind of weird and just
- 3:46not being there with you fully. You can tell that something is
- 3:49going on and you just don't and you don't want to ask, but you
- 3:52can sense it. So sometimes you want to stay
- 3:55out of that way. You sometimes this is how you
- 3:56survive in the relationship with an arsenal.
- 3:58You have to get, you have to learn how to read their energy.
- 4:00I'm going to do a whole video on that.
- 4:03But if they're stressed, you can tell it they it's just like we
- 4:05can't hold this one thing that we cannot hide.
- 4:08You know what I mean? We cannot hide.
- 4:11We we can't hide how we feel. It is horrible.
- 4:13Like narcissists cannot hide how they really feel.
- 4:15You can feel, you can tell it. You can feel their energy like
- 4:18they like what brings a narcissist stress.
- 4:21Anything. Y'all, anything that's out.
- 4:23Anything that's outside of that narcissistic person's control
- 4:28brings them stress. Anything little, big, whatever,
- 4:33you know, anything that's outside that narcissists control
- 4:39is going to bring them stress. You know, they have to survive.
- 4:43Writing this down, Y'all that's going to be how to divide to
- 4:45survive with a narcissist. I'm going to get my wife to do
- 4:49that. I'm going to get my wife to hop
- 4:50on the episode too. If y'all want my wife to hop on
- 4:51the episode, I don't know. I don't know.
- 4:54I don't want to. I don't know if she's going to
- 4:55hop on it because she don't want to give people hope to stand the
- 4:57type of relationship. Yeah, we'll see.
- 5:02But that episode is definitely coming soon.
- 5:04But you get into that space though.
- 5:05Y'all like Narciss. People like anything that's
- 5:07outside of our control because you know, Narciss love control.
- 5:10Anything that's outside of the little control bubble.
- 5:13We absolutely hate it and it brings us stress if we can't
- 5:17control it. Like, especially if you like,
- 5:19let's say you got a narcissistic person that's having an affair
- 5:23and they are stressed like they walk.
- 5:25They're going to walk around stressed all the time.
- 5:26That they're a fair party is going to out their motel on them
- 5:28where somebody else is going to find out.
- 5:30So they going to, we live there. That person right there is going
- 5:33to live a life of perpetual stress.
- 5:35They're going to always be in the highly stressed state
- 5:37because they don't know who the hell is.
- 5:38You can be thinking with Toto, you know what I mean?
- 5:41They don't know if somebody's going to tell on them.
- 5:43So they're always walking around in a highly stressed state with
- 5:48their mind all torn the hell and messed up.
- 5:52They always going to be walking around like that.
- 5:53If they about losing their job, they going to take it out on
- 5:57you. They and they don't want they're
- 5:58not going to communicate that with you until you decide like
- 6:01the only the only time that the narcissist person will
- 6:03communicate their stress to you is if you communicate some type
- 6:07of stress. This one of the only time
- 6:08there's some other times one of the only times that narcissists
- 6:11will communicate with is stressing them out with you is
- 6:14if you tell them that you're stressed out about something
- 6:15it's like the it's like you damn near competing in the stress
- 6:18Olympics like you you you bring them the gold medal of stress
- 6:23you say hey look I'm so I'm about to lose my job and get I'm
- 6:27going to get fired and we're going to lose the house.
- 6:29They going to be like, you know what it's like?
- 6:32That's not gold medal stress. I got gold medal stress.
- 6:34You got silver or bronze? I get gold medal stress.
- 6:38Right here. Let me see.
- 6:38I hurt my back this morning. My butt hurt, my teeth hurt, my
- 6:42head hurt. I might lose my job and my job
- 6:45is more important and and and and I'm losing my memory that
- 6:52it's going to. Yeah, I'm not.
- 6:53I'm just saying like, but that's how it's going to go.
- 6:55Y'all. That's how it ends up being.
- 6:57A lot of times they need dynamic in these situations.
- 6:59That's how it goes right there. They're going to compare and
- 7:02compete with your stress. You can't bring stress to them.
- 7:05They don't. Not only do narcissists not
- 7:07handle our own stress well, we don't handle yours well either.
- 7:11We tell you to get look, get over it.
- 7:14There's you complaining. There's complaining.
- 7:15People will. People will love to be your
- 7:17situation, but if we go through the same thing and you say the
- 7:20same thing to us, put your boxing gloves on you, we get
- 7:23ready to have an emotional fight or sometimes a physical fight,
- 7:25you might have to physically fight them.
- 7:27If you try to minimize what their stress they're going
- 7:29through with their stress, even though they minimize yours, they
- 7:31just they literally just minimize yours.
- 7:35And they're they feel like you're trying to minimize their
- 7:37oh man, get rid of the box emotionally or physically box
- 7:41because they're going to be angry as hell at you.
- 7:43And that's the space that you're going to be in doing the toxic
- 7:46narcissistic as per this, this, this literally the space you're
- 7:49going to end up in right there. Y'all they're going to make you
- 7:51emotionally or physically box them because you compare and
- 7:54contrast stress. You know what I mean?
- 7:56They're going to. They're out.
- 7:57The double standards exist. If you dealt with the Narciss or
- 8:00you're dealing with one right now.
- 8:01The double standards absolutely exist in these relationships.
- 8:04They just do. That's one of the things that
- 8:07death taxes and double standards with a narcissist.
- 8:10You see what I'm saying? Because they like that.
- 8:13They they you don't. You don't get to do what they
- 8:15get to do. That's just part of it.
- 8:17I know some of y'all are fighters.
- 8:18You fight back, be careful, be safe, like.
- 8:21But overall, you don't get to do what I get to do.
- 8:24And I always have a reason for why I get to do what I get to
- 8:27do. You know what I mean?
- 8:28I always got a reason why I do what I do.
- 8:31But you can't do it. You know what I mean?
- 8:34You can't do it. That's a very unique space to be
- 8:37in right there. Like, you cannot do it.
- 8:40Dealing with a narcissistic person, dealing with a toxic ass
- 8:42person, you don't get to do what they get to do.
- 8:44It's not well, it's not fair. Y'all, y'all y'all, yeah, it's
- 8:51not. We'll leave it at that.
- 8:53It's not fair, you know. It's not fair.
- 8:56Dealing with a toxic, narcissistic, abusive person
- 8:58that you have to live with or have kids with.
- 8:59They tricked you. It's not fair.
- 9:01And they, like I said y'all, if you're pregnant or pregnant, if
- 9:04they're pregnant by you or whatever it is, whoever's having
- 9:07a baby, they're anything that's out of their control.
- 9:10It's going to stress them out. Pregnancies, money, finances,
- 9:13which stress out non narcissistic people as well.
- 9:15But you can handle stress better.
- 9:17You know how to handle stress. You can acknowledge the stress
- 9:19and seek out help. A narcissist that is stressed
- 9:22out would rather self destruct. A lot of them would rather self
- 9:26destruct their own lives and burn their lives to the ground.
- 9:30Metaphorically speaking and sometimes not metaphorically
- 9:34speaking, not hypothetically speaking.
- 9:35Hypothetically, they would rather burn their lives to the
- 9:38ground. Then they ask for help.
- 9:41You know what I'm saying? I know some people, other people
- 9:43are non narcissists, have pride issues and things like that as
- 9:46well. But a narcissist would rather
- 9:47sink with the shit. Like, bro, we got lifeboats over
- 9:50here. Just hop off the sinking ship,
- 9:52hop into the light bulb. Let me help you.
- 9:54I don't need no help. My look, it's going to sink but
- 9:57it's going to come back up. Why?
- 9:58Boom float. They going to back down to the
- 10:01depths with the Titanic, you know what I'm saying?
- 10:03They rather go down up to the depths and be down there with
- 10:05the Titanic than to be over there.
- 10:07Like to deal with anybody else, but that's part of it There.
- 10:10Y'all that's part of dealing with a toxic narcissistic
- 10:13person. This, this, the dynamic.
- 10:16They don't handle stress well at all.
- 10:18And you if you dealt with the narcissists, you understand
- 10:21this. When they're stressed, typically
- 10:23you want to get out of their way.
- 10:24Y'all you want to avoid them. I want to do a longer video
- 10:26about surviving with the narcissists, but like you have
- 10:28to avoid them. Read their energy, stay out of
- 10:30their way. You can if you want to ask
- 10:33what's wrong, ask what's wrong. But don't expect the general
- 10:35answer. Y'all, if you want to ask what's
- 10:37wrong, did you just get that out the way?
- 10:38Because sometimes they'll sometimes they'll chastise you
- 10:41for not asking what's wrong, but then they'll also chastise you
- 10:45for asking what's wrong. So it's like you're damned if
- 10:47you do and you're damned if you don't.
- 10:48Sometimes. So choose the choose the damned
- 10:53that benefits you the most. In these situations.
- 10:54Choose the damned that keeps you the safes.
- 10:56Choose the damned. It allows you to the the most
- 10:59mental reprieve, the most mental space.
- 11:01Because a lot of narcissists, like said most narcissists do
- 11:03not handle stress well. Y'all and they're going to make
- 11:05everybody. It's going to make it
- 11:06everybody's issue. Make it everybody's problem,
- 11:08your problem, the kids problem, y'all, everybody's problem
- 11:12around them. You're going to feel that.
- 11:13You're going to have to understand that space.
- 11:14Y'all it is, That's part of it. But anyways, y'all take
- 11:18opportunity and y'all if you haven't already make sure you
- 11:21join my newsletter. I'm writing a self love journal
- 11:24and a writing. I have a self love course and my
- 11:26kids book is coming out soon to y'all it should be done by the
- 11:28end of this month like and subscribe you haven't y'all
- 11:31mental healness is up. Peace.
- 11:33What is going on beautiful people.
- 11:34Thank you so much for making it to the end of my video, watching
- 11:37it all the way through. Y'all if you haven't already, go
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