Latest / The Rooted Woman Podcast / How to Make More Margin in Your Day
Transcript
- Courtney: Welcome to the Rooted Women Podcast, the place for Christian women who are ready to grow deeper in their faith, find freedom from the things keeping them stuck, and confidently walk in the calling God has placed on their lives. Here we're getting rooted in biblical truth, having honest conversations about real life, and learning what it looks like to actually live out our faith. I'm Courtney, your host, and I'm so glad you're here. Let's get rooted. Starting off with a question today. Have you ever had one of those days where you felt like you were already behind before your feet hit the floor? It's like you didn't even open up your Bible app or your actual Bible and you didn't even pray yet, but you wake up and you're already stressed out, realize you're running late and you've got a million notifications and everybody's whining already if you're a mom, and you just feel like the day is already pulling so much from you and you have no idea how you're gonna catch up and you've only been awake for five minutes. If that is you, I want you to hear this. You are not failing. Your life is just really, really full right now. And there's a difference between the two. Today we are talking about margin, what it is, why we lose it, and how to make room for it again so you can stop surviving your days and start stewarding them well. So you have more room for the Lord in your life so that you are operating out of the overflow of everything that He is doing inside of you. So that you're not running around anxious and depressed and flustered and constantly, you know, getting frustrated with other people and your surroundings. And really just being able to be at peace because you have room to process all of those feelings with the Lord before you ever react, okay? So here's what I've learned, and I've been trying to teach this to the women in the road to rooted mentorship. Overwhelm usually is not the actual problem, it is a margin problem. Margin is something scripture talks about a lot more than we actually realize. So by the end of this episode, I want you to walk away with three things. Number one, a clear picture of what margin really is. Two, what Jesus modeled about rest and space in a life that was very busy and three five practical ways to start creating margin this week, not 10 weeks from now, not in the new year. We're gonna start right away, okay? So let's start with a picture. Think about a sheet of notebook paper and down the left side there's a thin let red line and no one writes past that red line, right? That blank space is the margin. It is not wasted space. It's what keeps that page being able to be read. Or readable. Without it, the words would run off the edge of the page. Your life kind of is the same way. Okay. Margin is the space between your load and your limits. Say it again. Margin is the space between your load and your limits. It is the breathing room between what's required of you and what actually is available within you to be able to give to other people. Okay. When your load is bigger than your limits, you are living with no margin. So when your load is bigger than your limits and you've got all these things on your plate, you are actually living with no margin. And then that's when the little things become really big things. And one simple spill or somebody not being able to find their shoes turns into a full blown episode in your heart, in your mind, maybe even a meltdown for your toddler. Okay. And you eventually lose sleep over it because you are so flustered about the way that you are living your life. So how did we lose margin? I think there are three big thieves. The first thief is hurry. In my home, we have a saying, Jesus never rushed. If any one of our family members, I am talking about my toddlers, okay, my toddlers included, notices that anybody else is rushing in our home, we will speak out loud, Jesus never rushed. It is the temperature gauge of our home so that we keep each other accountable and that we leave room for the Lord. Obviously, we want to steward our time well, but we do not want to be rushing to get to the next thing just because we have so much on our plate. And so that's a little gauge that we have in our house. So the first thief is hurry. We've been taught that a full calendar means a full and successful life. That if we are busy, we must be important, but busy and fruitful are not the same thing. Okay. And we have to recognize that. The second thief is the inability, pure inability. This was me for so long to say no. every yes to something is a no to something else. So when we say yes to every single volunteer event, every request that comes our way, every opportunity, we are saying no to rest or to our families, or sometimes even to the Lord. And then the third thief is a huge one and I've seen it over and over again in our new disciplined and devoted little two-week study that we're doing in the Facebook group. The third thief is the screen. Those little gaps that used to be margin, waiting in line, sitting in the car, five minutes before the kids wake up. We are filling them with scrolling. The space is still there. It never went anywhere. We're just using it in the wrong way and it leaves us feeling empty. And we've got to do something about that, ladies. So I'm going to talk about that at the very end. Here's something beautiful. God actually built margin into the law of Israel. So if you look at Leviticus 19, 9, it says, When you reap the harvest of your land, you shall not reap your field right up to its edge, neither shall you gather the leanings after your harvest. We shouldn't reap it right up to the edge, right? God told his people, don't harvest all the way to the edge. Leave some space. The margin was for the poor and the sojourner. It was an act of trust and generosity. What if the edges of your day were meant to be left open for you to be able to? Rest with the Lord for you to be able to pour out more to your children, for you to be able to steward your marriage in a new and different way. What if that space was for God to interrupt you in the middle of that meltdown? What if that space was for him to change your heart so that you have a different perspective when you walk into the next thing that he has for you? Space for a neighbor in need, maybe, space for somebody to come and talk to you that just really needs their heart heard and space for you to breathe. But instead we're living right up to the edge, right up to the edge, and that's leaving no room for him. Okay, so let's talk about what Jesus modeled about margin. If anyone had to have a reason to stop, it was Jesus. He had three years of public ministry to change the course of eternity, literally. Crowds followed him everywhere. People were literally lowering their friends through roofs to get to him, okay? Chasing him through the crowds just to touch his garment. And here's what he did: Mark 6:31. And he said to them, Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while. For many were coming and going and they had no leisure even to eat. We need to have margin for rest. If Jesus, who is perfect and who is perfectly capable, needed to rest, we need to rest too. And I've talked about rest a ton, but I'm talking about margin for rest. Okay. Not just scrolling on your phone. True margin for true rest. Okay. Many were coming and going, they had no leisure to even eat. Do you feel that way? Are you just eating in your car on the go all the time? Like eating the leftover chicken nugget scraps that you have from your kids? We have to create more margin than that. Our bodies were not meant to live in that stressful state, 24-7. Jesus' response was not to push harder, it was come away and rest a while. in Luke, it tells us that this was actually a pattern and not just a one-time thing. Okay, Luke 5, 16, but he would withdraw to desolate places and pray. We need to withdraw to a desolate place to pray. This can be pulling over for five minutes on the side of the road or waiting in your driveway before you walk into the house or back out of the driveway to go to the next event that you have. This can be like me in my front room, my kids know if I'm sitting there, mommy needs a minute and I'm giving most of those minutes to the Lord. If I need to answer a phone call or something like that, I will do that in that space too. But they know that that time for me is uninterruptible. They can come to me if there's an emergency, but when I'm sitting in that front room, I need a quiet moment with the Lord so that I can continue to do the things that He's calling me to do and do them well because I want to serve God with excellence, right? Jesus withdrew and that was a habit that he built in. Jesus built margins into his rhythm on purpose and he filled it with time alone with the Lord. Okay. Now Let's go to a home in Bethany. You the story. Martha's in the kitchen working hard, serving Jesus. We talk about this all the time. And Jesus is literally telling her, You're missing the main thing. Why are you anxious and troubled about all of these things? Come to the foot of the Father. We need this example so much in our lives because this is the toil that we struggle with. Like I want to serve well, I want to say yes. I want to be able to pour out. I don't want to be selfish. But resting and leaving margin for the Lord is actually not selfish. It's selfless. It's saying I need less of myself and less of me in my own strength. And I need more of the Lord to come in so I can do these things better. So I can do the things that He's asking me to do and not be frustrated while doing them or bitter while doing them or respond to my children with a harsh tone just because I'm overwhelmed. I love that Jesus named Martha twice. Because he's being tender here and not scolding her. So this is not me condemning you. This is just a gentle reminder that we do need to leave ourselves some room, or we are never going to be able to fully hear from the Lord and receive the direction and the discernment and the wisdom and the guidance that we've been praying for all along. Okay. We're gonna go into the five practical ways. I'm keeping this one short and sweet today because it's it is just short and sweet. We don't have to fluff up this message. I just want to leave you with this so that you can go and apply it because I am seeing over and over again in my messages, y'all are overwhelmed. Y'all have no margin and we need to come together and do this together. Okay. So let's get practical. There are five things that we can start this week, right now, not in the new year. Like I said, we don't have to wait for a new month even we can start it right here, right now. we're gonna do one or two at a time and then move from there. One or two at a time and then move from there. You're gonna see in something very fun. I cannot wait to tell you about it. Very fun that we have coming soon. And I say we because that was also an Easter egg of a hint. there's gonna be a system for you to now track things like this. And I can't wait to give that to you. So stay tuned for that. But that doesn't mean that we don't start now. Start with your first 15 first 15 minutes before you give your attention to your phone or to anyone else. give it to the Lord. If you feel like you cannot do a full hour, I'm asking you for fifteen minutes to give to the Lord. Can you give him fifteen? That's a small, small, small portion of your day, okay? And if you feel like, well my phone is my Alarm clock and then I get distracted. Okay, brick your phone. I'm gonna leave the link to the brick in the show notes. Please get it. It is one of the best things that I've ever had. I have a schedule on it, so it turns my apps off at a certain time every night and will not turn them on until after 8 a.m. in the morning. And then I can add, you know, more time to that if I need to, or sometimes if I notice that I am on my phone more, I'll go upstairs and I'll just tap it to my brick, or you can brick it right from where you're at. You don't need the brick to get your apps locked, you just need the brick to unlock it. And so it has been a game changer for me and I highly, highly, highly, highly, highly recommend it. Okay. Mark f one thirty five tells us that Jesus rose very early in the morning while it was still dark to pray. Okay. We need to give our first part of the day to the Father. A practical tip is to Have your alarm on your phone, but have everything else silence on do not disturb and brick your phone and then set a timer immediately. Fifteen minutes, don't do anything else until you've prayed and sat with the Lord and that timer has gone off. Number two, build buffer between commitments. Most of us schedule our days back to back, like the drive takes zero minutes and nobody ever needs a bathroom break. Okay. I was doing this when I was working, and this was one of my first tells that I needed to pull back. Okay. I didn't even have a bathroom break in my day. And I recognize, whoa, I can't keep doing this. Okay. Because it will spend your whole rest of your day late and frazzled. Try this. Add a 15-minute buffer before and after every appointment that you give your yes to. I know that this is not always possible and I understand that, but I want you to try, okay? And if you finish something early, that's not wasted time. That is margin. Don't spend it scrolling, spend it with the Lord. I promise you, watch how your days change, watch how your heart posture changes, watch how your mental state changes, watch how your capacity changes. Pray. Breathe. Text a friend that you've been thinking about. Answer the phone call that you need to answer. It doesn't always have to be spent in worship and prayer, but use your margin well. Okay. Three, practice a holy no. Okay. Here's the question that I've started asking before I say yes to anything. Is this for me in this season? Is this mine to carry right now, Lord? Not every good thing is a God thing for you in this season. And some yeses belong to somebody else. And you need to just pray and release that to the Lord and He will give it to the next person in line. When you hold on to a yes that is not yours, you're actually taking that opportunity from the woman that God meant it for. Okay. So remember that every single time that you feel like you have to say yes, you actually don't have to. Okay, pray through it and the Lord will give you wisdom, discernment, and direction as you ask him. Number four, again, the screen time. Now you need to have no phone zones in your home, in my opinion, and that's something that you need to pray about and talk to the Lord about and your husband and children. Okay, no phone zones in the home, no phone zone time in your day. I suggest that you have an ability to be able to turn off or put away your phone for an entire portion of a set. day where it's like I know I'm not going to be distracted or pulled in by this at all. And I'm going to leave it at that. You have to pray through what that looks like for you. Number five. Protect a weekly rhythm of rest. God did not suggest a Sabbath. He commanded it. And he did that because he knows we need to rest. Your Sabbath might not look like a full day. And I understand that, especially if you have little ones, it's very hard to be like, we're gonna rest an entire day. That's okay, but you can still block off time or say, these tasks are tasks that we don't do on this day, or these are things that we don't say yes to on this day. And you can model that for them. They're never going to learn it if you're not modeling it in the first place. Okay. Psalm set Psalm 127. seven verse two is it is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest eating the bread of anxious toil for he gives to his beloved sleep make sure that you are resting that you are getting enough sleep every single night i have been working on this i've been tracking my sleep my sleep score went from in the 70s and sometimes lower to 90 okay i'm getting so much better rest because i put those boundaries on my day and on my week To not only rest like sleep, but also rest with the Lord so that I'm not up late at night anxious with my thoughts, right? because that will prevent us from sleeping too. But if we give it to the Lord throughout the day and we've got our little 15-minute margins here and there, guess what? You're gonna be sleeping better. I can promise you that because I'm a walking testimony of it, okay? Before we wrap up, I wanna say something really important. The world will tell you to create margins so that you can be more productive. Clear your schedule so that you can squeeze in even more and rest so that you can grind harder tomorrow. And that is not what I am talking about here. I do not condone that, okay? Biblical margin is not about getting more done. It is about making room for God to do what only He can do. It is an act of trust that says, Lord, the world will keep spinning if I stop. You are God. I am not, okay? Sometimes the best use of your time is to rest or nap, but ask God what to do with that time and watch how he increases your capacity as you lean into him and you ask for permission throughout the day as you go about and say yes and say no and pick up this extra thing or set it down or rest or move forward. Use wisdom, use discernment, pray through it and ask God to help you steward it well. And if you're listening thinking, Courtney, I cannot cut anything right now. My season is just so full. I hear you. Some seasons are a little heavier than others. In those seasons, margin might be small, but it's still possible to get it. If you can't do the 15-minute marks, then do five minutes. If you've got five minutes, God can make that five minutes feel like an hour when you're surrendering it to him. And I tell you that from experience. Okay. Challenge for you as we close out. Pick one of those five margin practices that we talked about, just one. And I want you to do it every single day for seven days. And then take out a piece of paper and draw that red margin line down the side. And every day on the left side, write one thing that you noticed about that space that you created. Maybe this was a conversation that you would have missed because you were rushing and you wouldn't have paid attention to the kid that was calling for your attention, a verse that stuck out to you differently because you were able to pause there a little longer, or a moment of peace that really changed the trajectory of your day. By the end of the week, I think that you will be. would be surprised by what was waiting for you in the margins. If this episode encouraged you, would you do me a favor? Share it with one friend that you know is running on empty. Just send it with a little note that says, Hey, I thought of you. That might be the margin that she needs today. I'm going to go ahead and link for you the Rooted Woman Connection Facebook group in the show notes so that you can get into the disciplined and devoted challenge. And then I all also will link the Call to Speak Summit so that you can get on the wait list for that as well. And if you haven't yet, hit follow or subscribe so that you never miss an episode. You will never know how much it will help somebody else when the word gets out there. Let us pray. Father, thank you that you are not a God of hurry. Thank you, Lord. Thank you that you are gentle and lowly in heart and that you invite us to come to you and rest. Lord, I lift up every woman listening right now who feels stretched thin today. You see the full calendar, you see the endless to-do list and the weariness that she maybe isn't even voicing out loud to anybody, but carrying inside that's causing anxiety, that's causing frustration, that's causing bitterness. Would you meet her right there, Father? Give her wisdom to know what is hers to carry and courage to set down what is not hers. And help her to build in the margin of her days, Father, so that she can rest with you more so that she can be led by you more, not that she can do more with her time. Lord, let it be all about you and not about us. Teach us, Lord, to just surrender each and every yes to you, each and every no to you, and to trust you with the outcome of it all. Lord God, we just ask for deeper margin so that we can serve you in greater ways, Father. In Jesus' mighty name we pray.