Latest / Networking Unleashed: Building Profitable Connections / Networking Unleashed: An Interview with Mike Brcic and Michael A Forman, Professional Speaker

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Networking Unleashed: An Interview with Mike Brcic and Michael A Forman, Professional Speaker · Networking Unleashed: Building Profitable Connections

0:16
Welcome to Networking Unleashed, Building Profitable
0:19
Connections, the show where real relationships
0:23
create real opportunity. I'm your host, Michael
0:28
Foreman. Let me ask you something. Have you ever
0:31
been in a room full of people and still felt
0:34
disconnected? In business, we're constantly meeting
0:38
others, exchanging information, and having conversations,
0:42
but genuine connection. the kind that builds
0:45
trust, opens doors, and actually means something,
0:49
is something much harder to find. My guest today
0:53
believes that the quality of your relationships
0:56
is directly tied to how aligned you are with
1:00
yourself. We're talking about why human connection
1:03
matters more than ever, how to move beyond surface
1:07
-level conversations, and what it really takes
1:11
to build relationships that impact both you,
1:14
both your life, and your business. Because at
1:18
the end of the day, the strongest opportunities
1:21
don't come from perfect words. They come from
1:25
real connection. If you want deeper relationships,
1:29
stronger trust, and connections that truly matter,
1:33
you're in the right place. So let's get into
1:36
it. I'd like to welcome to the podcast today,
1:39
Mike Borsick, and he is an expert in this field.
1:47
And Mike, welcome to the podcast. And could you
1:50
give us like a little clip notes of how you got
1:53
where you are today? Yeah, thanks, Michael. First
1:56
off, I'm thrilled to be here. I'm thrilled to
1:58
be chatting with you about this topic that I
2:00
think is near and dear to both our hearts. I
2:03
have been an entrepreneur for 27 years. And I'll
2:08
give you the, as you say, the cliff notes of
2:11
how I got here today. I've been running my current
2:13
company, Wayfinders, for nine years. And really,
2:16
it was born out of my previous business. I was
2:19
aggressively trying to expand that business all
2:21
over the world and bring it on investors. growing
2:24
the team expanding all over the world and as
2:26
the business grew i was encountering more and
2:29
more problems that i was unfamiliar with was
2:30
unqualified untrained to handle so i started
2:33
going to different entrepreneur events joining
2:35
a couple of communities and a lot of these events
2:38
that i went to followed the same format there
2:41
was a speaker on the stage and there was a workshop
2:43
and then a breakout and this and it was really
2:45
just a lot of information being fire hosed at
2:48
me but what i really wanted was just to connect
2:50
with other people and so From my previous business,
2:54
we ran high -end mountain bike trips all over
2:56
the world. And so I was deeply embedded in this
2:58
adventure space. We were taking people outside,
3:01
mountain biking, doing challenging things. And
3:03
I knew that when you bring a group of people
3:05
together and you're doing challenging, fun things
3:07
together, they tend to bond quickly. So I thought,
3:09
what if I took a different spin on the Entrepreneur
3:12
Conference and it was more about connection and
3:15
it was more about fun and challenge and things
3:17
like that together? We could have a little bit
3:19
of information still. anyway so i ran i ran an
3:22
event in 2017 in the canadian rockies out of
3:25
this beautiful cat skiing lodge five days hiking
3:27
mountain biking exploring a little bit of content
3:31
we'd have some panels and stuff like that in
3:33
the afternoon people loved it they asked me to
3:35
do more and here i am nine years later i sold
3:37
that previous business and here i am nine years
3:40
later running events all over the world mongolia
3:42
papua new guinea greenland you name it and really
3:46
feeling blessed to be where i am That actually
3:50
sounds great. And it sounds like you're right.
3:53
It's right in line with what I talk about. I
3:56
go across the country and I talk about it's that
3:58
deep -rooted human connection. And you get so
4:02
much more information than if somebody is spraying
4:06
a fire hose at you and you're trying to take
4:08
a drink. So you're really concentrating on that.
4:11
But let's delve into the questions. You emphasize
4:15
the importance of human connection. Why do so
4:19
many professionals struggle to build it even
4:22
when they're constantly meeting people? Yeah,
4:26
this has been an ongoing journey of mine as well,
4:29
because as an entrepreneur or a professional,
4:31
it's really easy to just get focused on the task
4:33
at hand. And we get we get in front of our laptop
4:35
and we'll spend hours. And that feels like we're
4:37
it feels like we're doing real productive work
4:40
that way. But engaging with people, going for
4:43
lunches or whatever, it doesn't feel it feels
4:45
you can't quite measure that the same way you
4:48
can measure a marketing campaign or a Google
4:50
Ads campaign or whatever. And so it's a little
4:53
bit harder to quantify and it can feel a little
4:56
bit like wasted time. Oh, that lunch was great,
4:58
but I really need to get back to work. And what
5:01
I have found, particularly for my business, is
5:03
that relationship building is not only personally
5:06
nourishing, but it's absolutely the highest ROI
5:09
activity I can do in my business. Try not to
5:14
approach it from a transactional standpoint,
5:16
where it's just trying to check off the boxes
5:18
and meet with people, but take a genuine interest
5:20
in people and genuinely connect with them because
5:23
it feels good to me. It feels good to them. And
5:25
they walk away from that interaction feeling
5:27
uplifted, feeling positively impacted. And that,
5:31
of course, those feelings then extend to my brand.
5:34
And they're just a little bit more likely to
5:36
want to talk about my founders, my company, a
5:39
little more likely to want to take part in it.
5:42
And I'm always on the lookout for ways that I
5:44
can provide value to people, even if it's just
5:46
in the smallest way. And sometimes the most value
5:49
you can, the best way to create easy value for
5:51
people is just make an introduction or make a
5:53
connection. And one of the, when I meet with
5:55
people, you know, two questions that I love to
5:58
ask them are, what are you excited about? And
6:00
what are you struggling with? Or what's a challenge
6:02
these days? Both of those give you a window into
6:06
providing value to somebody. They tell you what
6:08
they're excited about. It's probably some goal
6:10
or some dream or something that they're working
6:12
towards. And what they're challenged by is probably
6:16
something they're a little bit stuck with and
6:17
haven't been able to figure it out. They need
6:19
the right tool. They need the right person, whatever.
6:21
And I can say, hey, I know just the person to
6:24
introduce you that might be able to help with
6:26
that. And if you can introduce somebody to someone
6:28
that helps solve a problem that they've been
6:30
struggling with, do they think of you positively
6:33
after that? Yeah, you hit on so many points that
6:36
are so on point. I don't have time with this
6:40
podcast to go over all of it. But I'll tell you,
6:43
I found that the pandemic was my line in the
6:46
sand. Before the pandemic, things were really
6:50
transactional. I have a widget, you have $3.
6:53
Okay, we'll exchange it and I'm fine. But ever
6:56
since the pandemic, it's become more relational,
6:59
more relationships. Relationships matter. Because
7:02
here we are on Zoom, and after the pandemic,
7:06
that's all things were. But I have to realize
7:09
that you are a person behind the camera. And
7:13
I have to find out, A, what makes you tick, but
7:16
how can I bring value to you without being in
7:19
the same room as you? So that's all how it goes.
7:24
Much more to say about that, but I'm not going
7:26
to go into it. What's the difference between
7:29
being around people and actually feeling connected
7:32
to them? Yeah, great question. One of my friends,
7:38
an Irish fellow by the name of Philip McKernan,
7:41
excellent coach and fellow facilitator, were
7:43
actually collaborating on an event in Iceland
7:46
at the end of May. But he has this saying, relationships
7:48
move at the speed of vulnerability. if you and
7:53
I are going to exist on a level where we talk
7:55
about baseball or we talk about the weather or
7:57
whatever, that's really going to limit our connection.
8:00
But if I'm willing to open up a little bit and
8:03
share who I am, share my hopes, my dreams, my
8:06
struggles, all that kind of stuff, probably some
8:09
of that's going to really resonate with you.
8:11
And some of it you might outright connect with
8:13
because it mirrors your own story or you might
8:15
have empathy for what I'm going through, whatever.
8:17
All of that stuff is adding, just adding more
8:20
fuel to the connection fire. so to speak right
8:22
and the difference between connect just networking
8:25
or surface transaction level and actual genuine
8:27
connection is each party's willingness to go
8:30
a little bit deeper and i have this sort of concept
8:32
that i work with at my events that i call the
8:34
vulnerability ladder and you can't jump a bunch
8:37
of rungs because you're gonna you might freak
8:39
some people out and if it's like you just met
8:41
and all of a sudden you're talking about you're
8:43
struggling with depression or whatever People
8:46
might be, some people might be totally open to
8:48
that. And some people might just withdraw. Hey,
8:49
like I just met you. I just wanted to talk about
8:51
baseball. And so look at it as like you go up
8:54
a rung at a time. And if we connect and we talk
8:57
about baseball, I might say, hey, Tom, and it's
8:59
clear that you're passionate about baseball.
9:01
I'm passionate about baseball, by the way. But
9:03
yeah, and so I ask you, like, hey, tell me, did
9:05
you play baseball growing up? Tell me, what was
9:07
that like? And you might share a story about
9:09
playing catch with your dad or something like
9:11
that. And then, oh, yeah, I used to play catch
9:13
with my dad all the time. Boy, oh, boy, does
9:15
that take it up a couple rungs there instead
9:17
of just talking about the Yankees or whatever,
9:19
but actually our connection to that. And so if
9:22
we can move, slowly move up the vulnerability
9:24
ladder, that connection gets deeper and deeper
9:26
over time. And you just have to, you have to
9:28
measure that ladder and just go up a little bit
9:30
at a time and be willing to. That's the biggest
9:32
thing. It's true. And I use something called
9:35
F -O -R -M, family, occupation, recreation, and
9:40
a certain message. Now, I always try to get the
9:45
conversation around to youth sports. I was a
9:49
baseball coach for 16 years. I was an umpire
9:52
for three years. I know all about baseball and
9:56
what to say. I'm also, I coach on a junior level
10:01
children learning how to play baseball. So I'm
10:04
very passionate about that. But as you said,
10:07
it's a rung on the ladder. So if you get them
10:10
talking about that, people love to talk about
10:13
themselves, right? That's their favorite thing
10:15
in that favorite pastime. But if you can get
10:18
that, you have to build that level of trust.
10:21
And as you're speaking, as they are speaking,
10:25
and they're telling you their story, there's
10:27
a wall between the two of you. And that wall
10:30
is coming down, but that trust factor is going
10:33
up. And once it makes that change, then you're
10:37
in. Then you can start talking about something
10:39
more. I digress. I can go on again for another
10:43
whole podcast. I just want to say, as you, you're
10:46
talking about your 16 year history of coaching
10:48
baseball and umpiring. We just moved around up
10:50
a ladder because I feel more connected to you.
10:53
I'm curious. I want to talk to you about baseball.
10:55
And I used to coach my son's baseball team and
10:57
it instantly feels, oh, there's a real connection
11:00
here. And, and so it's a simple con. concept.
11:04
And my favorite way to move up that ladder is
11:07
just through stories, getting curious about,
11:09
genuinely curious about other people, ask them
11:11
to share some stories. People love telling stories
11:13
and then you get a window into their life and
11:15
that moves you up the ladder. Absolutely. Absolutely.
11:19
And just by that fact of we're through Zoom right
11:24
now, we're going through Zoom, but now we've
11:26
created that vibe. I keep saying, I'm referring
11:29
to that vibe, but we've gotten that much closer.
11:32
to it. So it works. How does a lack of personal
11:37
alignment show up in the way someone builds relationships?
11:43
Yeah, yeah. Thank you for that question. So alignment
11:46
to me is just this ongoing process of really
11:51
getting to know myself and understanding who
11:53
I am and who I am at my core. Because as human
11:56
beings, Growing up, we're subject to all these
11:59
different influences and all of these different
12:02
ideas about who we are and who we should be and
12:04
how we should be and what we should be in the
12:07
world. And then you get into adulthood and it's
12:09
very confusing. Who the heck am I? You get into
12:11
your 20s and 30s and you're starting to ask these
12:13
questions of who am I? Because you have to consider
12:16
it a bit of a process of archaeology, of sifting
12:18
through all this sediment of what people have
12:20
told me I should be and what I should be and
12:22
who I should be and getting to know the person
12:25
at the core. And unless I'm willing to go through
12:28
that process and really get to know myself and
12:30
find deeper alignment, and alignment to me just
12:33
means alignment between who I am at my core and
12:35
my outer world, my work, my relationships, where
12:38
I live, all this, bringing those two into alignment
12:41
so there's more of connection between those two
12:43
things. and so that personal alignment getting
12:46
to know myself then i get to know who are the
12:48
type of people that i really genuinely want to
12:51
spend time with and who are the people that light
12:54
me up and energize me and who are the people
12:57
that drain me because sometimes the biggest drain
13:00
psychological drain is when we have to show up
13:03
in with another person or a certain environment
13:05
and we feel like we have to adopt a persona in
13:08
that person's presence we have to be somebody
13:10
we're not and that's really psychologically draining
13:12
if you have to keep doing it over and you can't
13:14
be your true genuine self so that alignment is
13:17
just in in the context of relationships it's
13:19
just being in places where i feel like i can
13:22
just be myself i don't have to pretend i don't
13:25
have to censor myself i don't whatever that may
13:27
be and if that doesn't jive with the other person
13:29
then Great. Then move on. Find somebody I do
13:32
align with. Absolutely. I, from a hundred years
13:36
ago, when I first began all of this, I went to
13:40
the school of hard knocks. I learned how to do
13:42
everything wrong before I did it correctly. And
13:46
I was always thinking I had to be on. I had to
13:50
be this version that was always on. When I got
13:53
home, I was mentally tired. I can just go to
13:57
sleep right away. And I realized that I don't
14:01
have to be somebody else. I have to be myself,
14:04
be the best version of myself. But I have to
14:06
be myself. And then it takes all that pressure
14:09
off. And you can just go through and really enjoy
14:13
what it is that you do. Because life is short.
14:17
Life is short. When someone is truly aligned
14:21
with who they are. What changes in the way that
14:25
others experience them in conversations? People
14:29
who are really, truly genuinely aligned and have
14:32
a very strong sense of who they are in the world,
14:35
those people are rare. And when you encounter
14:39
those people, they emit a certain energy and
14:42
you can feel that energy. When I'm in the presence
14:48
of people who are just 100 % absolute, with 100
14:51
% conviction, know who they are, and that's how
14:54
they live in the world, it's powerful and it's
14:57
energizing. I want to be around more of that.
14:59
And so the more you step into that, the more
15:02
of a magnet you are. And you give other people
15:04
license to do the same because they're like,
15:06
hey, what is that person doing? And then you
15:08
can feel it like, hey, that person is just being
15:11
themselves and they don't care what other people
15:14
think. And it's taken me a long time to get to
15:18
this point because I have very strong convictions
15:22
in who I am. No desire to be anything other than
15:27
what I am. And I know that when I'm in the presence
15:29
of others, they feel more relaxed in just being
15:32
themselves. And so really that's my goal and
15:36
how I move through the world. And it requires
15:38
a great deal of self -awareness and self -consciousness
15:41
because it's very easy to fall back into that
15:44
trap. We put on certain masks, we adopt certain
15:46
personas, and you have to catch yourself. Wait
15:48
a minute, I'm doing that thing again. I was the
15:51
same way. I had to always be on. And for me,
15:53
it was like in my 20s, I was the... super energetic
15:57
party animal always the life of the party and
16:00
that's how I that's how I got attention but then
16:02
as I got older I realized that was just it was
16:04
the way I tried to get validation from the world
16:07
and the way I tried to get attention stuff like
16:09
that and it and it was exhausting having to be
16:11
that person all the time wait a minute it's okay
16:14
if I'm just like chill and mellow and or sometimes
16:17
sad or whatever I don't have to be so you know
16:20
When you do that, you just give lessons to other
16:22
people to just say, hey, I can be myself as well.
16:25
And we just need more people to just be themselves.
16:27
I realize that. And I think age has a lot to
16:32
do with it. The older you get, the more you realize
16:34
it. I'm in the 20s. I was in the military. I
16:38
was strong. I had everything going for me. In
16:41
my 30s, I started my family. And the 40s, the
16:45
50s, I'm in my 60s now. And I am just saying,
16:49
you know what? I am who I am. If you don't like
16:52
it, leave. But I am who I am when I go out to
16:55
networking events. Now, I do networking events
16:59
probably two or three times a week. And I just
17:02
go on myself. I have my own networking meeting
17:07
every week with about 15 or 20 businesses. So
17:11
I get to do that every week. And I get to just
17:15
be myself, but then turn it over. And I try to
17:17
teach everybody else to do that. before they
17:20
get to their 60s yeah can i just say you look
17:24
fantastic for a guy in the 60s thank you yeah
17:28
thank you thank you i should show my wife this
17:32
video yeah yeah but she's in her 70s and she
17:37
looks fantastic so that's amazing i lucked out
17:40
i lucked out yeah okay why do surface level interactions
17:45
feels so common in professional settings and
17:48
how can someone move beyond them? I think a lot
17:52
of that is we are, you know, I think for decades
17:57
now, there's been this increasing crisis of isolation
18:01
and loneliness and COVID of course, just ratcheted
18:04
that up a huge knot. And so as humans, we're
18:08
not, we've become less and less skilled at this
18:11
art. of human connection genuine true human connection
18:15
so that's part of it but also we've been trained
18:19
that to act put on the business mask put on the
18:22
professional mask put on your suit show up professional
18:25
in in these types of environments and so it feels
18:29
very awkward to let down your guard and take
18:32
off your mask and relax and be genuine and but
18:34
again the way through that is not that complicated
18:37
it's just be curious be genuinely curious about
18:41
the other person like you said people like to
18:42
talk about themselves and they appreciate that
18:44
and we've all been in the company of people who
18:47
just talk endlessly about themselves and we just
18:49
glaze over and we're like oh my god what a jerk
18:51
or whatever but when people are actually you
18:53
can feel it they're genuinely curious about the
18:56
about you it feels really good it feels really
18:58
energizing so if you can bring that energy to
19:00
a room and just a few good questions like i said
19:03
what are you excited about what are you what
19:06
you know what's challenging these days those
19:07
are two great windows into hearing about another
19:10
person's experience and most people will respond
19:12
well to those and then as you start to go through
19:16
that you might see some opportunities for picking
19:19
out some stories hey tell me a story about tell
19:22
me a story about one of your favorite moments
19:24
coaching baseball or your proudest moments coaching
19:26
baseball in your case I'm sure you could go down
19:29
that rabbit hole pretty deep and I could go down
19:31
that rabbit hole pretty deep with you. And we're
19:34
not talking about business at all or whatever,
19:35
but at the end of that conversation, I'm probably
19:38
considerably more likely to want to do business
19:40
with you and you with me because we want to do
19:43
business with people we vibe with and people
19:46
that we think are kind and curious and all that
19:49
kind of stuff. So that to me, it just feels good.
19:52
I don't want to talk about business when I'm
19:55
at a business event. I want to talk about...
19:57
human beings and stories. And then we can get
19:59
to business later on. Whatever I, because I go
20:02
across the country and I talk about networking,
20:05
business communication and leadership and all
20:07
that. I do workshops in all these companies.
20:11
And what I stress is that when you have a one
20:15
-on -one meeting, the first 10 minutes, don't
20:18
talk business. Don't talk business. Look around.
20:22
the office, look around the room. What do you
20:25
see? Do you see pictures of his family? Do you
20:28
see pictures of grandchildren? Do you see pictures
20:31
on the wall of music, of art? You can pick up
20:35
on so much. You have about 30 seconds to pick
20:37
up on everything. And ask about it. Ask those
20:41
questions. And by asking those questions, you're
20:45
directing him. or her but you're getting to the
20:49
form the family and of course i use a little
20:52
trick if you see photos on somebody's desk and
20:57
if they're facing inward towards him he doesn't
21:00
want to talk about his family if you see them
21:03
on the back credenza they're open where you can
21:06
see the pictures then it's the open season then
21:10
you can ask about the pictures so all these little
21:13
things That you can really pick up, but it's
21:17
all not asking those questions, but not having
21:20
him talk about business like the first 10 minutes.
21:24
But that also depends on where you are, because
21:27
I come from New York. I'm in Georgia now. In
21:31
New York, it's like when I come through the door,
21:34
you better start doing business because I don't
21:36
have time for you. I got 10 minutes for you.
21:39
But in Georgia, the first hour. that i was dealing
21:43
with somebody i couldn't talk business so there's
21:46
a huge difference but getting to the same thing
21:50
yeah what role does vulnerability play in creating
21:55
genuine gen genuine connection especially in
22:00
a professional environment yeah we i mean we
22:05
touched on this quite a bit already vulnerability
22:08
is the glue of connection yeah if If I'm approaching
22:13
my connection with another human being and hiding
22:18
big parts of myself, that's really going to limit
22:21
the depth to which we can go. Whereas if I'm
22:24
open to, over time, not all at once, but if I'm
22:28
open over time, opening up more and more parts
22:29
of myself to the other person and they're willing
22:33
to do the same, that's going to really deepen
22:36
our connection. And it's tricky in a professional
22:40
environment because we're really not used to
22:42
that. that that kind of thing and it also depends
22:45
on the level of your desire right if you work
22:48
in an office with 40 other people you probably
22:51
don't want or probably shouldn't be open and
22:54
vulnerable with every single person in the office
22:56
but there's tons of studies google did this huge
23:00
i think it's about took about two or three year
23:02
year research project called project aristotle
23:05
and they wanted to dissect what are the biggest
23:07
factors that lead to team productivity? The most,
23:10
and of course, Google has thousands of teams
23:13
in their company and what they discovered at
23:15
the end of all this, the biggest contributor
23:17
to employee and team productivity and the teams
23:20
that worked well together was psychological safety
23:22
just and psychological safety is just this idea
23:25
that i can show up i can be myself i can contribute
23:28
ideas i can contribute myself and i won't be
23:31
i won't be shamed for it i won't be put down
23:34
for it i won't be punished for it or whatever
23:36
i can just be safe saying and doing who i am
23:38
and What makes teams psychologically safe is
23:43
there's a high degree of connection among them.
23:45
They see each other as human beings, not just
23:47
as employees or roles or whatever, right? And
23:50
if you're leading a team or you're leading a
23:52
company, and I've done talks on this very topic,
23:56
the number one thing you can do for your productivity
23:58
is make a workplace where people feel like they
24:02
belong. And it doesn't have to be that hard.
24:05
In my previous company at our team meetings,
24:07
we would spend the first 20 minutes of our weekly
24:10
stand -up just connecting as human beings. And
24:12
I would usually seed it with a question or a
24:14
prompt. And over time, we would get to know each
24:16
other. And we would have frequent excursions
24:20
where we'd just go mountain biking together outside
24:22
of the office and just have fun together. Over
24:25
time, that made a very cohesive team. We felt
24:27
like a family. And that type of team works way
24:30
better together. Yeah, go ahead. You're explaining
24:35
what the culture of a company is. And the culture
24:38
works from the top down. It doesn't work if the
24:41
people on the bottom just say, OK, we want to
24:44
be this way. But the C -suite executives didn't
24:48
want it. Right. So you have to get that from
24:52
the top, from the owner, from the president,
24:54
the CEO on down. And when I coach. the executives,
25:00
because when I do the workshops and I teach all
25:03
the workshop, the members of the employees, 30,
25:07
40, 50 employees from back office to warehouse
25:10
to whatever, I can change the way that they think.
25:13
But if I don't change the upper management, then
25:16
nothing I do is going to work because it comes
25:19
from the top down. And what you created was the
25:24
perfect company for the mindset of the worker.
25:27
because they felt they could just go in and talk
25:31
to you at any time. So that was the type of culture
25:35
that you created, which should be a feather in
25:38
your cap. Thank you. So you connect personal
25:43
fulfillment with relationships. How do strong
25:47
connections influence both life satisfaction
25:50
and business success? I could quote you 10 different
25:54
studies. that point to human connection, the
25:57
value of human connection. Of course, I'm not
25:59
going to quote them, but I'll quote one of them.
26:01
There's a woman named Julia Holt Lundstedt who
26:03
did a meta study, something like 300 ,000 people,
26:06
analyzing the factors that contribute to human
26:10
longevity. What makes people live really long
26:12
lives and tied in with longevity is health, of
26:16
course. And the usual factors were on there,
26:19
not smoking, stuff like that, exercise, whatever.
26:22
The number one and number two. contributors to
26:25
human longevity were both related to connection
26:27
so number two was the strength and quality of
26:29
your intimate connections your partner your kids
26:32
your parents that you know that kind of thing
26:34
but number one was actually surprisingly is what
26:37
she called your weak ties so the neighborhood
26:39
you live in the the your friends? Do you belong
26:43
to a community group? Do you know your local
26:45
butcher? And all those little micro interactions
26:48
that you have on a daily basis, they contribute
26:50
to this sense of well -being, which then contributes
26:53
to better overall health. And it just feels good,
26:56
right? Chronic loneliness is, and the other part
27:00
of this world of research into it is that chronic
27:03
loneliness has been equated with having the same
27:05
effect as smoking a pack or two of cigarettes
27:09
every single day. So you would actually, and
27:11
what this one study found is that you would actually,
27:13
your health outcomes would be better if you had
27:16
a life rich with connection and you smoked a
27:19
pack a day than if you were a lonely non -smoker.
27:22
And so this is critical to our health, to our
27:26
personal sense of fulfillment, but also on a
27:29
professional level. I already talked about just
27:31
the value of human relationships and how important
27:35
that can be. When people feel good in your presence
27:38
and they feel connected to you, they want to
27:40
do business with you. They want to talk about
27:42
you to other people. You could certainly run
27:44
a business where you do nothing but stare at
27:47
your laptop all day and you don't talk to other
27:48
people. And lots of people do. Ultimately, not
27:51
a very fulfilling business in my eyes. What makes
27:55
life fulfilling is spending it with other people.
27:58
I couldn't agree with you more. In my talks,
28:02
I talk about extroverts and introverts. And I
28:05
always get a thousand questions from the introverts
28:08
on, how do I do this? And how do I do that? When
28:11
I go to an event, what do I do? And things like
28:14
that. And I say, you know what? Just go. Just
28:18
go. Just be with other people. Humans just naturally
28:23
want to be with other people. We're not built
28:26
to be behind a computer, right? That's the whole
28:29
thing. What daily habits help someone stay grounded
28:34
and present so they can connect more deeply with
28:37
others? Yeah, for me, I have a few daily practices
28:42
that just really help me connect to myself and
28:46
stay anchored and grounded. I have a daily breathwork
28:48
practice, meditation. Journaling really helps
28:52
me. And I go in waves with my journaling. I'll
28:55
have these phases where journaling two or three
28:56
pages every day, and then I'll go a month without
28:58
doing it. But it's just, it's such a good practice
29:01
for just getting to know myself better because
29:04
it's all this stuff that's. happening behind
29:07
the scenes, below the waters. When I start journaling,
29:10
it comes out onto the page. And sometimes I'm
29:11
just writing and I surprise myself like, oh,
29:13
where did that come from? That's interesting.
29:15
And it's, I'm having a dialogue with my subconscious,
29:18
these deeper parts of me that want expression.
29:21
And the more I get to know myself, the more peaceful
29:25
I feel, the more grounded I feel. And then I
29:27
can bring that to my relationships rather than
29:30
being totally untethered or anxious or not having
29:34
any idea who I am or whatever. The more clarity
29:37
and depth and grounding I can bring to myself,
29:40
the better the quality of my relationships. And
29:43
that feels good. Good. Okay. So let's bring this
29:48
podcast full circle. If a listener wants to experience
29:52
stronger, more genuine connections in the next
29:55
90 days, What one internal shift should they
30:00
make for the biggest difference? Yeah, it's a
30:03
good question. I'm going to speak from my own
30:10
personal experience, which is that growing up,
30:13
I felt a really profound sense of alienation
30:18
and not belonging. And there weren't that many
30:21
places where I felt like I belonged. And that...
30:25
you know, those wounds carried through into adulthood.
30:29
And it wasn't like I didn't have friends or I
30:34
didn't have other people around me, but I never
30:35
quite felt comfortable or I felt like I belonged.
30:38
And that really compromised the quality of the
30:41
relationships I had with other people. And as
30:44
I've gotten to know myself better and as I've
30:46
done more inner work. I'm able to work through
30:49
a lot of those old patterns and old stories.
30:51
Because if I leave those unchecked, there's this
30:54
kind of operating system operating in the background
30:57
that says other people are scary or other people
31:00
are dangerous or don't go too deep because you're
31:03
going to get hurt or whatever that story may
31:05
be. If I'm not aware of that pattern and making
31:08
different choices, then I can get in this pattern
31:12
of just retreating. and not engaging, not being
31:16
willing to go deeper. But the more I'm able to
31:18
be aware of that and work with it and stay conscious,
31:21
the more I can say, oh, and I can just bring
31:23
some loving awareness to it and say, oh, there
31:24
it is again. There's that old protection system.
31:27
It's okay, I got this. I can breathe into it
31:29
and just be like, okay. And then I can drop in
31:32
with somebody else and we can have a wonderful
31:33
conversation. I can be open, I can be vulnerable
31:35
without feeling overwhelmed. So I think one of
31:38
the biggest things you can do is just... be spend
31:41
more time getting know yourself do the work understand
31:44
we all have these patterns that we've inherited
31:46
from childhood that that follow us into adulthood
31:49
and they compromise our ability our relationships
31:52
or our work or whatever the more we can do that
31:54
work whether it's working with a therapist whether
31:56
it's journaling whatever it is spending time
31:58
in the wilderness the better the quality of your
32:01
relationships and the connections you will have
32:03
in your life Fantastic. Fantastic. It sounds
32:08
like age had a little bit to do with that. You
32:10
got a little smarter as you got older, but that's
32:13
good. Hopefully. Yeah. Hopefully it all worked
32:16
out. Mike, this was absolutely great. I learned
32:20
so much. If somebody wanted to get hold of you,
32:23
either to be coached by you, to pick up your
32:26
services, or just to say hello, what's the best
32:30
way that they can get hold of you? Yeah, they
32:33
can go to way -finders .com. And that's my company,
32:36
Wayfinders. And we host these incredible journeys
32:39
around the world where people come together,
32:41
really connect deeply and explore these wonderful
32:43
themes while having a ton of fun and exploring
32:47
some very cool areas. So you can find me there.
32:50
That's great. This conversation is a reminder
32:53
that networking isn't just about expanding your
32:56
circle. It's about deepening your connections.
32:59
When you show up aligned, present and genuine,
33:03
people feel it. And those are relationships that
33:07
lead to trust, collaboration, and real opportunity.
33:11
Take one step this week, slow down in your next
33:14
conversation, listen a little more, ask one more
33:18
deeper question, and be fully present. You may
33:22
find that one meaningful connection is more valuable
33:25
than 10 quick ones. If you found value in today's
33:29
episode, make sure you like, follow, and subscribe
33:31
to Networking Unleashed, building profitable
33:34
connections so you keep getting the best insights
33:37
on networking and communication. And share this
33:40
episode with someone who's ready to build more
33:43
meaningful relationships in both life and business.
33:47
If you'd like, if you'd help. strengthen your
33:50
communication and building communications that
33:53
truly matter. Visit Norman to learn how I work
33:56
with professionals, teams, and organizations.
33:58
So until next time, be present, be genuine, and
34:02
build connections that actually mean something.
34:05
Mike, thank you again for coming on the podcast.
34:08
This was wonderful. Thank you, Michael. It's
34:11
been a pleasure. Well, hold on, folks. Don't
34:16
go anywhere. Let's hear from our sponsors. David
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where you're moving, Henry has the right connections
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for you. You can contact Henry at 561 -427 -4888.
35:08
A huge thank you to our guests for sharing such...
35:12
insights today. And of course, a big shout out
35:15
to you, our amazing listeners, for tuning in
35:18
and spending your time with us. If you're interested
35:21
in my digital courses, being coached or having
35:24
me come and talk to your company, just go to
35:28
Michael and fill out the request form. Remember,
35:31
networking isn't about being perfect. It's about
35:34
being present. So take what you've learned today,
35:38
get out there and make some meaningful connections.
35:41
If you've enjoyed this episode, please don't
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35:49
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35:53
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35:57
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