Latest / Privycast / Ep. 103 Voter’s Guide to America’s Best Restroom 2023

Transcript

Ep. 103 Voter’s Guide to America’s Best Restroom 2023 · Privycast

0:00
>> Speaker A: I want someone to come up with a
0:03
campaign ad that just says,
0:06
vote for me because the other guy is a dumb
0:09
duty face. Like, just the
0:11
most kindergarten level smear tactics,
0:14
like he smells like farts. That's
0:17
what I want to see. Um, if you're a
0:20
candidate and you have the guts to just
0:22
launch the most preschool, kindergarten, and smear
0:25
campaign that you can, you might get my
0:28
vote.
0:32
Welcome back to privy. Privy
0:35
is a podcast about bathrooms
0:38
recorded in my home
0:40
bathroom. I'm your host, Hunter
0:42
Hoover, and I love bathrooms.
0:45
We, uh,
0:50
sorry. Just got a
0:53
message from friend of the show. Uh,
0:56
we're in discussions about how much
1:00
refrigerator should cost, um,
1:02
particularly a non working refrigerator. It's a special
1:05
thing, but
1:08
we went on a short little road
1:11
trip between last episode and this
1:14
one. Uh, and if you're hearing this
1:17
before I tell you about that, uh, if you're looking at
1:20
this and you're looking at the date and,
1:23
uh, you're finding that, uh,
1:27
no, you're not crazy. Um,
1:30
this is not coming out on a five. Uh,
1:33
that will become abundantly clear why, as we
1:35
continue. Um, but this is kind
1:38
of a privy special release. We are
1:41
releasing a few days ahead of schedule for the
1:44
purposes of giving enough time m to
1:47
have our coverage be beneficial. So, um, hopefully
1:50
you can listen to this soon after it comes out, and the
1:52
coverage will be helpful. And if not,
1:54
um, whatever. That's your
1:57
business. Uh, but, yeah, we took a little road trip
2:00
to Montana, um,
2:03
and just
2:07
the amount of stopping for bathrooming is
2:09
always.
2:12
We did a two day drive. You can do it in one, but we did
2:15
it in two. Um, and I think
2:18
part of that is just due to
2:21
the known amount of time that we have
2:24
to stop. But the worst of these pit
2:26
stops was actually on our return trip.
2:29
I want to share this because it's just the most
2:32
frustrating, and it's nobody's fault. People
2:35
can't help when they have to go to the bathroom. But
2:38
in the moment, it's just like, can we not?
2:41
But we're driving back, uh,
2:44
westbound on I 84,
2:46
um, in Oregon, and
2:49
my son, child has to go to the
2:52
bathroom. And so he's doing a good job
2:55
of holding it, and we're pushing it and pushing and pushing. We finally
2:58
find the pull off
3:00
that's going to have the amenities. The McDonald's big
3:03
old yellow m m.
3:05
>> Speaker B: Is just shining bright and loud.
3:07
>> Speaker A: And so we pull off. I don't even remember. It's like the one that goes
3:10
down towards bend, I think. But, uh,
3:13
it's a long road towards the end of that, um,
3:16
but we pull off, and this
3:19
McDonald's shares a parking lot with
3:24
what seems to be the only truck stop
3:26
in a hundred miles. Because
3:29
every semi truck on the planet was
3:32
in this parking lot. And
3:35
also, it's just a disaster to get in and
3:38
out of as a semi. Um,
3:41
man, it took us
3:44
longer to park and
3:47
get out of the parking lot and back on the road
3:50
than it did for three different people to
3:53
go into the McDonald's.
3:55
Um, two of which use the restroom, to my
3:58
knowledge. And it's just one of those things where
4:01
it's like the truck drivers
4:04
can't enjoy this. They can't look at this
4:06
McDonald's fondly and think, oh, man, I love
4:09
sharing a parking lot with these guys. Uh, they just
4:12
can't. Yeah,
4:15
these are the things. Every now and
4:18
then they're taunting us with a chick
4:21
fil a over here. Uh, we're in Albany,
4:23
Oregon. They're taunting us with one. They keep saying, it's
4:26
coming. I'll believe it when I feast on
4:29
that chicken. Um, but they
4:31
are supposedly, again, supposedly
4:34
confirmed, are building one in Corvallis. It's about 15 minutes
4:37
drive away. And they're like
4:40
doing road work on the road right outside of where they
4:42
say they're going to be building it.
4:45
Uh, and
4:48
it's one of those things where it's like they put these businesses and
4:50
things in and I think they got the
4:53
spot. But then the city of Corvallis was.
4:55
>> Speaker B: Like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
4:57
>> Speaker A: You do not have the
5:00
traffic infrastructure and
5:02
just general ability to keep
5:06
traffic moving through this part of
5:08
Corvallis. For you to put a chicken filet
5:11
here, you just can't do it. Um, it's going to be clogged up
5:14
harder than an old man who just had way too
5:17
much pizza cheese.
5:19
But as I noted, this episode,
5:23
it's not a rushed release. Um, but
5:25
it was kind of an unexpected thing.
5:28
Uh, normally
5:31
I like to have coverage of something
5:33
where there is somewhat of a call to action
5:36
for you all. A little more ahead of time. But
5:39
with the hubbub of trying to
5:42
win a porta potty, we're still trying to do that.
5:45
Uh, we're trying to get that honey
5:48
bucket as the record. Uh,
5:51
but my attention was on that
5:53
as another competition. And at the front
5:56
here, I want to put a plug
5:59
in. And
6:02
that is that
6:05
the poop map, um,
6:07
app? It's great. You can track where you've gone. And it's a
6:10
cool thing to look at the map and you can join the privies
6:13
and the social group, it's chill.
6:15
>> Speaker B: It's kind of a fun thing, but.
6:16
>> Speaker A: I put that here, uh,
6:19
because it's just another level of competition.
6:23
There's people who try to compete in the app for
6:26
who can, I guess, poop the most, uh,
6:28
or have the most places where they have
6:31
pooped. It's really cool because you can look back and see all the
6:34
places that you've brown bagged,
6:37
deluxed it. And in the spirit of
6:39
these competitions, whether it's me trying to win a
6:42
porta potty or me trying to poop more than
6:45
everybody on the Internet, I guess, or something,
6:48
uh, slightly later
6:51
than I would have preferred it, we
6:54
now launch our yearly
6:56
coverage of the America's
6:59
best restroom competition.
7:10
I should note at the top of this, so that way you can
7:13
navigate to it while you are listening. Um,
7:16
see that? Multitasking. You can vote
7:19
at the link. We're going to have that in the description below,
7:22
and it'll be in our drum links until the competition
7:25
ends. Um, so go vote
7:28
on your favorite restroom for America's best
7:31
restroom 2023. Uh, and if
7:33
you have a bathroom near you that you think is
7:36
worthy of America's best restroom, they
7:39
have nominations open
7:42
for the 2024. Best restroom right now. They
7:45
haven't even crowned 2023, but you can
7:47
nominate 2024. Imagine, um,
7:51
either lack of courage or the audacity of somebody
7:54
in this current 2023 running,
7:57
putting their bathroom up as
8:00
a 2024 entrant. Ah, that would
8:03
be a bold move.
8:04
>> Speaker B: It would also show an incredible lack of confidence.
8:07
>> Speaker A: But they're not too out of suit, uh,
8:10
because we have elections coming up in
8:13
2024 here in the United States, and they're
8:16
already debating, um, they're getting ready for the first
8:19
of these debates, uh, which means
8:21
that I will just hate TV and the Internet for the
8:24
next year and a half. Um, I don't want
8:27
it.
8:30
We're going to get into this.
8:33
So now that you've navigated to Cintus's website
8:36
to cast your vote, consider this, this
8:39
episode of Privy,
8:41
your voters guide to America's Best
8:44
Restroom 2023.
8:48
But before we must,
8:50
if you've listened.
8:51
>> Speaker B: To the show, you know that you.
8:54
>> Speaker A: Can draw a straight line between the things that we need to
8:57
do, but we have to take the
9:00
most zigzagged, cockeyed method
9:03
to that. That we must. And so,
9:06
in, uh, order to really give you
9:09
the spirit of democracy as.
9:11
>> Speaker B: You vote, we need to talk about.
9:14
>> Speaker A: The background of voter guides. Since we are
9:16
serving as a voter guide,
9:19
the history of voter guides is short,
9:22
um, but it's kind of neat. Now,
9:26
I must confess, I did
9:29
use.
9:30
>> Speaker B: One, ah, of those AI websites
9:33
to.
9:33
>> Speaker A: Help me prepare some of the research today because
9:36
as I began to do it, I didn't really know where to start
9:39
because
9:42
voters guides are drastically
9:45
different.
9:45
>> Speaker B: Than propaganda, or at least they should be.
9:48
>> Speaker A: And so trying to find the history of these
9:50
was, uh, kind of interesting.
9:53
But what I'm here to tell you is that this AI is not that
9:56
good. Um, it's good, but it's not that good because
10:00
right out of the gate, it completely missed the point. So I put in
10:03
history of voter.
10:03
>> Speaker B: Guides just to spur on my
10:06
research.
10:07
>> Speaker A: And I'll go research from there.
10:09
>> Speaker B: And according to it, the voters
10:12
pamphlet.
10:13
>> Speaker A: Was first used in ancient Greece.
10:16
Now we'll hear that and we'll go, oh yeah, I've heard of ancient
10:19
Greece. They do a lot of things first, but we need
10:22
to look at the.
10:23
>> Speaker B: Device that they are saying is
10:26
this.
10:29
>> Speaker A: Early voters pamphlet. We got to look
10:32
at this thing. Um, so this device was
10:35
called the
10:37
claritarian.
10:40
And, um, I got to tell you, this
10:43
device could not be farther from a
10:46
voter's pamphlet or a voter's guide than
10:49
you could get. Because voter pamphlets,
10:52
those kind m of overly thick,
10:54
overly sized books that you.
10:56
>> Speaker B: Get in the mail around election season.
10:58
>> Speaker A: That are like, we're going to lay out as if
11:01
it's voting for dummies, what all of these people think.
11:04
And my favorite is when they can't even stir up a photo of the
11:07
person. Like they're running for public office, but they can't
11:10
even find a photo of them. That's my favorite.
11:12
Um, yeah,
11:15
what was really funny was
11:18
here in Oregon in the 2020
11:21
election, uh, we are one of the states
11:24
whose ballots actually had good, uh,
11:26
old Kanye on it and no picture was
11:29
given. It was so fun, uh, on these voter
11:32
guides, no picture of Kanye. Like, they couldn't
11:35
find one. The dudes. Yeah. Anyway,
11:38
but the voter pamphlet is designed to
11:41
inform the reader about the
11:43
candidate or the issue, so that way
11:46
they make their own
11:48
informed decision.
11:50
>> Speaker B: The claritarian takes all
11:53
choice out by.
11:55
>> Speaker A: Randomly selecting someone to an office.
11:58
Now this thing is kind of like
12:01
a really old slot machine, uh,
12:04
that has like, mated
12:07
and produced a child.
12:08
>> Speaker B: With a bingo cage.
12:12
>> Speaker A: Think of it like if you
12:15
elected judges and things using
12:18
a bingo cage. Rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle.
12:21
You yanked, sucks the ball, yank the
12:24
ball out. And some of the
12:26
time that would be fine. Like,
12:29
honestly, we could save, um, probably millions of
12:32
dollars and tons of time and effort if we
12:35
had this system in the United States, selection
12:37
via random draw. But
12:40
the problem is
12:43
there are large swaths of people
12:46
who, for one way of putting
12:49
it, are insufficiently gifted to
12:52
lead people. Uh, and another way of putting
12:55
it is they're just incredibly stupid. And
12:59
you don't want ding dong Louie's name
13:02
getting slurped out of the bingo cage.
13:06
It's kind of like that hunger games where they get drawn,
13:08
but you get to stare as, like, the biggest
13:11
ding dong of all of the ding dong
13:14
kingdoms gets to rule you.
13:17
Um, random draw is not great.
13:20
Uh, the power of choice is pretty cool.
13:23
Uh, but your options
13:25
should not be between a poop
13:28
sandwich and a diarrhea sandwich. Uh, which is kind of
13:31
what's happened recently here. But
13:35
one time at the high school,
13:39
the idea of this thing is like, oh, we will leave it up
13:42
to the effectiveness of humanity to
13:45
lead. And with that idea in
13:48
mind, I want to share just a brief little
13:51
story here.
13:52
Um,
13:55
yeah, sure. Let's go for it. Let's make it a full
13:58
on hunter's
14:00
anecdotes to keep you
14:02
afloat.
14:09
So, as I've shared on the show and have recorded on
14:12
location, uh, I work at a
14:15
public high school here in Albany, Oregon. There's two of them,
14:18
so process of elimination will help you get that one
14:21
locked down. Um, but
14:25
one of the things that happens at the high
14:28
schools is they issue these teens
14:31
lockers, and they don't have enough lockers for every teen. So
14:34
some teens share, but what happens
14:36
is for
14:40
not majority, but just a large number.
14:43
Uh, frustrating, I would say majority. Yeah, let's go,
14:46
majority. So many of these teens
14:49
get a locker, and then they never use
14:52
it. Like, they put their crap in
14:55
there probably for the first two or three weeks, and then
14:58
they just slam shut, walk away, and they don't
15:01
open it again until, like,
15:03
the second to last day of school, which is
15:06
locker cleanout day. Now, this
15:09
particular locker, uh,
15:12
and the events that
15:15
follow this locker that thus destroy the hope that
15:18
we can trust humans to make good choices.
15:22
Um, so the kids are opening lockers,
15:24
and this one locker nobody was opening, so they just
15:27
opened it, and it was just full of junk, full of
15:30
crap. And usually what happens on this is it's
15:33
18 has shirked their responsibility and just decided
15:36
to not clean out their locker. Or they dropped out
15:39
or moved schools or something happened in their
15:42
lives, and they disappeared from the
15:45
school, but they did not clean out the locker.
15:48
>> Speaker B: And in the locker was this blanket.
15:51
>> Speaker A: Uh, and when you open the locker,
15:54
it kind of stank. Like it had a stank to
15:56
it. Uh, but as, um, one
15:59
of the students helping this teacher who has opened it,
16:02
pulls this blanket out of the locker, the
16:05
whole hallway is just engulfed in the
16:08
most putrid smell. Ah. And
16:10
it doesn't take long. Like, it's kind of musty, but it's
16:13
also very distinctly
16:16
urine. Um, and one of the kids,
16:19
he was trying to say that it was cat pee. I am
16:22
not confident on that. But
16:25
he yanks this blanket out, and he does the right
16:28
thing. He crams it in
16:31
the trash bin that's located central to the
16:34
hallway where they're dumping all this stuff out.
16:37
And they pull
16:40
this blanket out, and it stank, and it's kind of
16:42
randy in the hallway. And they did the right
16:45
thing.
16:48
But it smelled like, to me.
16:51
M if I had to bet, if I were a betting person,
16:55
what I think happened was,
16:58
at the school I work, we regularly have to
17:01
lock the.
17:01
>> Speaker B: Bathrooms because of vandalism
17:04
or tomfoolery or.
17:06
>> Speaker A: Any amount of reasons. Um, but in
17:09
short, it is not.
17:10
>> Speaker B: Uncommon for the bathrooms to be locked.
17:13
And so what I think happened is.
17:15
>> Speaker A: On one of these days, where the bathrooms were locked,
17:18
locked, either the kid who
17:21
owned this locker or his buddy.
17:24
>> Speaker B: Or some random passerby
17:27
opened the locker.
17:28
>> Speaker A: Because most of them, they jam them.
17:29
>> Speaker B: The minute they unlock.
17:32
>> Speaker A: Opened the locker and peed into the
17:35
blanket. Now, uh, this is all speculation, but
17:37
again, based on the smell and just.
17:40
>> Speaker B: The general vibe of the situation,
17:44
smells of pee.
17:45
>> Speaker A: And my guess is, having faced
17:48
the locked bathrooms, they
17:51
opted to pee into the locker blanket
17:54
and then leave it and walk away, spray and pray.
17:57
>> Speaker B: You know what I'm saying?
17:58
>> Speaker A: Uh, but this was absolutely
18:00
terrible.
18:03
And again, this story is
18:05
here to do something
18:08
to diminish your faith in.
18:10
>> Speaker B: Humanity, to make good choices here,
18:13
because.
18:14
>> Speaker A: Naturally, an entirely different kid, and he's
18:16
different for more than one reason, who
18:19
comes by and he yanks the blanket out of the
18:22
trash, and he slings.
18:23
>> Speaker B: It around his neck, and he runs.
18:25
>> Speaker A: Down the hallway, like, pretending to be, like, a
18:28
superhero or masked caper.
18:33
And then it's not until, like, 15
18:36
minutes later when he throws it in the trash again, and he's,
18:39
like, trying to figure out why. Now his shirt
18:41
stinks. And I'm like, dude, because that
18:44
blanket stank of pee. You didn't
18:47
smell it when you.
18:47
>> Speaker B: I just thought it was the hallway.
18:49
>> Speaker A: Incredible. And I share that
18:52
because with the claratorion
18:55
system, that kid could one
18:58
day end up being, uh, our judge.
19:01
No, thanks. And I'm not trying to say he
19:04
can't be whatever he wants, but I am.
19:08
This has been hunter's anecdotes
19:11
to keep you afloat.
19:21
This machine, this claratorion,
19:24
is also kind of like a DNd dice tower. And some
19:27
of its mechanisms, like how it works, it's got, like, a
19:30
tumblr system wherein it drops, like, colored
19:32
blocks or dice down through a thing.
19:35
>> Speaker B: It's kind of weird.
19:37
>> Speaker A: Um, I'm kind of glad I learned about it.
19:39
>> Speaker B: It's not a voter pamphlet, but it is interesting,
19:42
rather.
19:43
>> Speaker A: As democracies started to
19:46
spread into modernity, it
19:49
was quickly followed by something
19:53
that was not a voter pamphlet, but would.
19:56
>> Speaker B: Definitely make you need one.
19:59
>> Speaker A: As people started to compete for
20:01
places of office, smear campaigns
20:04
got worse and worse. Attacks on character and even
20:07
outright lies are used to
20:10
influence your vote for certain people.
20:13
>> Speaker B: And now, I know this might come.
20:15
>> Speaker A: As a shocker, but these tactics are still
20:18
used today. I know
20:21
I want someone to come up with a
20:24
campaign ad that just says,
20:27
vote for me, because the other guy is a dumb
20:29
duty face. Like, just the
20:32
most kindergarten level smear tactics,
20:35
like he smells like farts. That's
20:38
what I want to see. Um, if you're a
20:41
candidate and you have the guts to just
20:43
launch the most preschool kindergarten smear
20:46
campaign that you can, you might get my vote.
20:49
Uh, mostly because I don't think my vote matters,
20:52
but nowadays,
20:55
it wouldn't matter. Like, your kid can do drugs
20:58
wherever and you sit happily unaware that you're even president.
21:01
But with smear tactics came the
21:04
desire to know what was true.
21:07
Is that true? Did
21:09
Eisenhower really eat glue? And like
21:12
it, did
21:15
Taft's mom actually hate
21:17
kittens? Was
21:20
Roosevelt really a duty face like the
21:22
competition said? Well, we needed a way to
21:25
tell whether these claims were
21:27
legitimate.
21:31
In America, democracy has changed
21:33
its shape. Um, what's wild is
21:36
women have only been allowed
21:39
to vote in these
21:42
United States for just over
21:44
100 years. The
21:47
19th amendment was ratified on August
21:50
18, 1920, and it gave women,
21:53
amongst.
21:53
>> Speaker B: Other things, the right to vote.
21:55
>> Speaker A: And it was a long battle leading up to this point.
21:58
This did not happen overnight. The women's
22:01
suffrage movement and other like minded voter
22:03
movements had lobbied information, made
22:06
action to get the right to vote to
22:09
women.
22:12
But with the ratification of the 19th
22:15
amendment, women could vote. But that
22:18
did not mean that those women were now all
22:20
informed. Many of the men of
22:23
society gathered their political information when
22:26
they left the home. And in a time where many women
22:29
stayed at home, how were they to get this
22:31
information? Previously
22:34
existing agencies, such as the National American
22:37
Women's Suffrage association and the National
22:40
Council of Women Voters would later merge
22:42
and come to be the National League of Women
22:46
Voters. In 1920,
22:49
as the 19th amendment was ratified,
22:51
the league grew, and their goal
22:54
was to raise voter awareness and
22:57
raise civil rights awareness. Now,
23:00
this was associated with race, but it
23:03
was the civil rights for women, children
23:06
and minorities, primarily that they,
23:08
um, had attention on.
23:11
The league was formed by Carrie
23:14
Chapman Cat. And
23:17
her last name is Cat. She is not a cat, um,
23:20
that I know of. I won't tell her who she is,
23:23
but, uh, the formal organization
23:26
was drafted at a 1920
23:28
convention held in none other than
23:31
Chicago, Illinois. Now more on
23:33
Chicago next episode. Stay tuned.
23:36
Uh, but the league did
23:39
a lot to raise awareness.
23:42
Women could vote, but as we said,
23:45
that voting needed to now be
23:47
informed. The league
23:50
drafted surveys and conducted
23:53
surveys to help raise awareness and get
23:55
feedback on what issues were
23:58
important and what information was missing
24:01
in the population.
24:04
The league really made its mark in
24:07
1926
24:10
when the time president of the league,
24:13
Bell Sherwin, emphasized that
24:16
education in politics is the right
24:18
road towards true democracy.
24:22
And that
24:26
gets an orange, vanilla polar seltzer
24:29
of approval.
24:33
Information booths were set up in
24:35
stores. Talks to highlight candidate views
24:38
were conducted in public settings.
24:41
They advocated for voter registration,
24:44
and in short, they got the ball rolling in America
24:47
on making informed decisions when it came to
24:50
vote. Nowadays,
24:52
when there is a vote, you get a guide in the mail that
24:55
lays out the candidates and their views. And you can go find it all
24:58
online if you don't want to read the mail.
25:01
The National League of Women Voters
25:05
paved the way for voter guides.
25:07
>> Speaker B: And nowadays, we
25:10
make informed decisions via.
25:12
>> Speaker A: An Internet that is, well,
25:15
maybe audited and edited by certain
25:18
individuals. Making
25:21
an informed decision
25:24
is important to democracy.
25:27
And here on privy, we are in complete agreement with
25:30
them on this. And so, without
25:33
any more, at this point, any more of the
25:35
25 minutes of the shows.
25:38
Further ado, we present the
25:41
2023 America's Best Restroom
25:44
association voters guide,
25:48
brought to you by,
25:51
well, me, but, uh,
25:54
in conjunction with the nod towards the Cintis
25:57
corporation, who holds the competition in and of itself.
26:00
Good for them.
26:07
So we're just going to run through these bathrooms.
26:09
Uh, so number one, top of the list is the
26:12
Baltimore Washington International Thurgood
26:15
Marshall Airport restroom in
26:18
Baltimore, Maryland.
26:20
This bathroom is a new construction, uh,
26:25
and this is going to be kind of a common
26:27
theme throughout all these bathrooms, but it features
26:30
these single stall, privacy occupant
26:33
bathrooms. What this is, is when you go into
26:36
a normal bathroom, let's say you go into
26:39
Walmart. Now, unless you're in Jerry Crane's
26:41
magical. Very good Walmart. Most of these
26:44
look like a hellscape on earth, and
26:49
they feature a door
26:52
that has two
26:55
negative things to it. The first is
26:57
any child or pervert can just
27:00
look right underneath the foot gap and just stare
27:03
right up at you while you do your thing. Now, you can
27:06
curb stomp them, but
27:09
they can do it. Uh, and the
27:12
second problem that the traditional bathroom stall
27:15
has is you can just peer right over the top.
27:18
Like, if you are beyond six foot
27:20
tall, you could get an oopsie glance at
27:23
someone's little midge, and you
27:26
don't want that. Or maybe they
27:29
do. Uh, but
27:31
they have these privacy stalls, and this is a common
27:34
thing. There's also seating in the
27:37
Baltimore Washington.
27:38
>> Speaker B: International Thurgood Marshall Airport, uh,
27:41
for those.
27:42
>> Speaker A: Who may need to wait while you drop your
27:44
fat, those
27:47
you ate too many of those biscoff cookies on
27:50
your flight, and now you got to drop a fatty.
27:54
What's really cool, one of the cool features of this
27:56
bathroom is it features real time
27:59
inventory counts. So they must have some
28:02
sort of a system hooked to the janitorial or.
28:04
>> Speaker B: Stocking staff at the airport,
28:07
but it.
28:08
>> Speaker A: Can tell how much of different
28:10
items are available in the bathroom and when.
28:13
>> Speaker B: They need to be refilled.
28:15
>> Speaker A: As for the aesthetic of the Baltimore
28:18
Washington International Thurgood Marshall airport,
28:22
it's whitewashed. We talked about this last year in the
28:25
2022 rundown, but
28:28
there's just a trend, especially in airport
28:30
bathrooms, to just make them white. Like, it's like,
28:33
oops, did we save money
28:36
on white paint? Because we're going to make this thing as white as we
28:39
possibly can.
28:41
I think it's to trick your brain into thinking it's
28:44
cleaner. Uh, what do I
28:47
know? Number two, clear Lake
28:50
and Des Moines river safety rest area in
28:53
Jackson, Minnesota. Now,
28:58
this is another new construction
29:00
bathroom. Uh, and it's
29:03
located on I 90 near
29:06
Jackson. And they have a brick and paneled
29:09
vibe. It's kind of that coupled
29:11
with local artists art
29:14
unique to each bathroom space.
29:18
Uh, they boast gender neutral bathrooms, family
29:21
bathrooms, and yes, the privacy
29:24
stalls. These are doors that go all the way to the
29:26
ceiling and all the way to the ground, in case I did not mention that
29:29
earlier. Number three, the Drusian
29:32
Dar in Nashville, Tennessee. Now,
29:35
the Drusian Dar, I'm probably saying that wrong,
29:37
but here's what you got to know. It
29:40
is a restaurant located inside a
29:43
hotel. So in this case, the
29:46
bathroom is located inside a restaurant
29:49
inside a hotel inside of
29:51
Nashville, Tennessee.
29:54
This is a redesigned bathroom.
29:58
And, uh,
30:02
you'll know which one you're looking at on the
30:05
America's best restroom voting page because I'm going
30:08
to describe it in one word, and that is pink.
30:11
This mo joker is pink. And
30:13
they said that they updated this style to
30:16
compete with the very trendy men's art deco
30:19
bathroom that is also in this
30:21
restaurant. Uh, it's like 50
30:25
shades of pink, layered and textured.
30:27
There's a pink couch, pink counters. It's all pink.
30:30
Oops. All pink. The pink panther might just not
30:33
be able to contain himself. The lights are
30:36
pink, for goodness sakes. They made
30:39
the bathroom to be a site to have photos taken in.
30:42
And this is something else that is new. And we're going to
30:45
see happen a couple of times is
30:48
people are keying in on the
30:50
photographability of very dope
30:53
bathrooms. And in the case of the
30:55
drusian dar, they lean into it. They're like, hey,
30:58
you want to take a picture in our very pink bathroom? It'll be
31:01
neat.
31:02
Uh, I bet they aren't
31:05
taking pictures like we got over on randy Bowles. Go check
31:08
out Randy Bowles. Do so at your own
31:10
risk. It's the pink
31:13
one.
31:13
>> Speaker B: You'll locate it.
31:15
>> Speaker A: Number four, the El Rio in San
31:18
Francisco, California. This bathroom
31:21
is located inside the El Rio
31:24
dive bar and pub in San Francisco.
31:26
The vibe is supposed to be kind of
31:29
futuristic. Tokyo subway. To me,
31:32
if you've ever played fibbage three on
31:34
Jackbox party pack, who knows which one?
31:38
Um, it kind of has that, like,
31:41
multicolored kind of.
31:43
I think of it as, like, 90s retro
31:46
video game, like, three color stripe
31:49
vibe. It's eighty s, ninety
31:52
s vintage stripe. To me, that's kind of what it gives.
31:55
But that's the El Rio. Um, it looks new, looks
31:57
clean, perfectly serviceable. Number
32:00
five, the frying pan in New York.
32:02
>> Speaker B: New York.
32:04
>> Speaker A: In New York, there are
32:07
these things called historical
32:09
lightships. And on one of these
32:14
is a bathroom. And that the ship is
32:16
called the frying pan. Now,
32:20
they remodeled the bathroom on the frying
32:22
pan, built a new restroom. It's
32:25
got nautical themes and vibes. It's on a boat, for goodness
32:28
sakes. What's cool is it has, like, vintage
32:31
wooden paneling all throughout this bathroom.
32:34
It makes it look really cool with the metal. Um,
32:37
what's really neat is the frying pan.
32:42
Oh, shoot. The light ship is a
32:45
registered historical site. It is one of 13
32:48
lightships remaining
32:50
of the original, over 100 built.
32:54
It also features in the bathroom,
32:56
hand painted
32:59
artwork of
33:02
the lightship. Of all these
33:04
lightships, number
33:07
six, Helen blaze's brewing company in
33:10
Melbourne, Florida. Now, the
33:13
building for the Helen Blazes
33:16
brewing company was built 120 plus years
33:19
ago. That's probably in the 18
33:21
hundreds. Uh, and it was built
33:24
as a hardware store that was
33:26
converted into a craft brewery and
33:29
pub. The bathroom
33:32
is designed to promote, and
33:35
it boasts that it has no lines at the
33:38
ladies room. It has an open lobby
33:40
style with this where
33:43
you go in. And it's kind of got a lobby as a
33:46
waiting room. So instead of waiting in line outside the
33:49
bathroom, m you go in and wait in kind of the bathroom
33:52
lobby for then to enter one of these
33:55
privacy stalls again. Uh,
33:57
it's interesting. Uh, it's got a
34:00
vintage, kind of reminiscent of the
34:03
history of the location. Uh, it's kind of a
34:06
cool idea, this loading zone
34:09
bathroom, especially for women, because they go to the
34:12
bathroom and they take forever, and there's
34:14
always a bit. No, I'm just kidding. But it's kind of
34:17
interesting that they keep doing this to women's rooms. You know what I'm saying?
34:21
Number seven, Jubin's
34:24
Creole restaurant in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.
34:27
Now, Jubin's Creole
34:30
restaurant restrooms were renovated in
34:33
2022. These are fresh. These are fresh off the
34:36
lot, and they feature very
34:39
dark blue walls, you
34:42
know, like in the office. When Dwight paints Michael's
34:45
office just black, it kind of gives me
34:48
that, but it's got little pops of bright pink in
34:50
it. This is
34:53
another one of these photostop bathrooms. They
34:56
boast that you can come in and take a photo
34:59
op in the bathroom, which they have
35:02
painted this way. I don't know, just.
35:05
Here we are. Number eight,
35:08
the little american hotel in Salt Lake City,
35:10
Utah. This bathroom
35:13
is another one of those bathrooms contained inside
35:16
a thing contained inside of a hotel.
35:19
Uh, they boast their
35:22
thing that makes them stand out.
35:25
Imported italian marble,
35:27
imported international pieces and
35:30
materials. It has top to bottom
35:32
privacy stalls. There they are again. And
35:35
pink wallpaper unifies it. You know,
35:39
our vibe.
35:43
2023 is the year of privacy
35:45
stalls in pink. So many of
35:48
these either have accents of pink, or they like the
35:51
duci and dar. They're just like, hey, what if we
35:54
made the whole thing pink?
35:57
Number nine is the rabbit hole in
36:00
Greenville, South Carolina. Now, the rabbit
36:03
hole is an Alice in wonderland themed
36:05
bathroom. It features just
36:08
countless pictures of both whimsical and
36:10
bizarre scenes and phrases from Alice
36:13
in Wonderland. The color scheme as well as the
36:16
foliage, it has a rose garden ceiling.
36:19
Make it feel as if you have gone into the rabbit hole
36:22
to go to the bathroom. Uh, the
36:25
feeling of being taken into another world
36:28
is very evident. Even just in looking at these
36:31
pictures, I feel like I'm lost in a
36:34
different space. The bathroom has Alice
36:37
in Wonderland playing on audiobook
36:39
over the speakers in the bathroom while you poop.
36:42
It's a nice touch.
36:46
And number ten is the snow basin resort
36:49
in Huntsville, Utah. This is
36:51
located inside a luxury ski resort,
36:54
and the luxury restrooms feature, again, italian
36:57
marble accented in bronze and crystal.
37:00
Essentially, this is a very fancy lad bathroom. It's a
37:03
very fancy bathroom. Um, and
37:06
it's funny because it's a fancy lad bathroom,
37:09
that these just
37:11
besmirched ski boot
37:14
wearing ski. People are going to just get their
37:17
ski boot wet all over this fancy
37:20
bathroom. It's good stuff.
37:24
And that's it. That's the end of our finalists,
37:27
uh, for the 2023,
37:31
america's, uh, best restroom, presented to us by
37:33
cintus. You can go and vote. I believe you can vote
37:36
once every day. Voting ends
37:39
August 11, so that's why you're hearing this
37:41
episode earlier than you normally would. To give you,
37:44
hopefully, ten days of voting to
37:47
influence, uh, your vote matters.
37:51
This is the end of the unbiased portion
37:54
of the voting pamphlet, if you will.
37:57
But now I want to tip my hand a bit.
38:00
The privy cast pick for best restroom.
38:03
2023 is the rabbit hole.
38:06
This place looks awesome. Uh, I
38:09
noted last year, and I will also note that the bathroom,
38:12
privy's pick of bathroom last year did not win. It
38:15
went to an airport. And it's, as I explained to my
38:18
wife, these cool bathrooms never win. It always goes
38:20
to these industries in these
38:23
places where it's like they're stacking it. And
38:26
I really hope one of the small dogs could win. The
38:29
drusian drawer, even though it's pink, is very dope
38:31
bathroom like, it's very cool looking. It's
38:34
striking. So go
38:37
vote. Uh, it's your right, it's your duty, uh, and
38:39
all that crap, uh, that they taught you in
38:42
government, uh, and links in the Doodley do
38:45
below or in the drum
38:48
thing for the podcast. And this brings
38:50
us to the end of another episode of Privy.
38:53
>> Speaker B: Thank you so much for joining us.
38:55
>> Speaker A: Don't forget to leave us a rating and review. Five star options are
38:58
preferred, and for every rating left, we will donate some.
39:00
>> Speaker B: Money to the wounded warriors project, reminding.
39:03
>> Speaker A: You to keep pooping in the free world. But the
39:06
free world was not always free. Follow us
39:09
on social. We're at privycast. You can follow me. I'm at owl
39:12
at seven. Uh, and if you're daring, you can go check out
39:14
Randy Bowles at Randy Bowles. We'd, uh,
39:18
like to thank Kevin McLeod and Pottington bear for the use of
39:21
their music this week. Thanks, Kevin and Pottington.
39:24
This has been another episode of Privy. Thank you so
39:27
much for joining us. Fart
39:29
proudly. Wash your butthole. And now,
39:32
as always, don't
39:35
forget to flash.