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The Reality Stars Worth Watching · Untraditionally Lala

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hello, gorgeous. It's La La Kent.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: Welcome to Untraditionally Lala. Hello, babes, Welcome to the bonus
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: episode of Untraditionally Lala.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: Hi, Hi tee.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: Thanks for joining me again on the heels of the
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: Lover's episode, because you guys know, I had the Haters episode,
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: which was so fun, and then by popular demand we'll
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: call it. People were like, we want to show you love,
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: and obviously I'm always open to accepting love, but I
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: also wanted to make this I just feel a little
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: uncomfortable by making it just an opening forum to say, like,
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: tell me how great I am. I wanted to be
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: a much bigger conversation. Reality TV has kind of shifted
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: the game. There used to be two different buckets. If
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: you were in entertainment, but you weren't an actress or
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: a musician, you were kind of a bottom fled you know.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: Now we have people like Alec Baldwin who have their
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: incredibly talented actors with a long resume who have reality shows.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: The crossover makes me so happy, and I think people
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: are really appreciating the art of reality TV. And even
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: though the comments section and they hate there is very loud.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: I think it's important for to not just be about
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: how you guys feel about me and my experience, but
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: other reality TV personalities that you've watched and gone wow.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: Them sharing their story has made me feel so much
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: less alone. It's taught me something that's important for me.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: So the bonus, I'm going to toot my own horn.
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: But also I asked you guys, who are some reality
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: TV stars. We're going to call them because they are
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: stars that have really impacted your lives in a positive way.
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: So this is what you guys have written. In Gerty
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: Real Housewives of Miami, she was diagnosed with breast cancer.
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: She could have left the show, but chose to keep
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: filming and living life. She is such an excellent representation
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: of someone who has faced a life altering moment, right
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: like your biggest fear coming true, and she shared what
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: that phone call was like. She still continued to live
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: her life and be messy, putting up the fucking text
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: messages between she and Julia. I was like, this bitch
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: showed us that she was in the fight of her
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: life and is still entertaining the fuck out of us.
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: I love this. Someone is giving her her flowers. I
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: agree this one stays close to my heart Britney Cartwright.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: She stood up to her toxic husband, who she's now divorcing,
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: has fans cheering her on from the sidelines.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: You know, I'm.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: Excited for you guys to see her on this upcoming season.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: You know, I think when you find your person.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: You guys have known Jack's Taylor for a really long time,
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: and I think a lot of us were sitting there going,
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: why are you marrying this man? But we didn't know
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: what it was like behind closed doors. I'm one of
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: her closest friends, and I don't know what it was
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: like behind closed doors. I have to imagine that there
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: were very, very beautiful moments. As much as I can't
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: stand the person I was with, and I've blocked out
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: the good moments, there are times that I go, oh,
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: that was a good time.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: I remember that.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: So the fact that she defended him like a wife.
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: You know, you take many vows. One of them is like,
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: don't fucking step out on me, but the others are
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: also very important. And she really stood by him and
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: tried to lift him up when he was really struggling.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: And then to watch her make that decision in front
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: of all of us. Camera's on saying I'm leaving this
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: man and now she's taken.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: On all the bills. No one hustles harder than Britney Cartwright.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: She's got a son who was diagnosed with autism.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: Someone is giving her her flowers because she deserves them.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: And there's nothing harder than when you're looping and you're like,
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: how the fuck did I marry this person and pro create?
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: Even though I'm very grateful, but how did I allow
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: myself to get to this point? And then the audience
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: chimes in about what a fucking dumbass you are. You're like,
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: you don't need to tell me, you don't need to
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: tell me, just be kind and fucking supportive, all right, anyway.
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: I like telling you your own for what you did.
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: I'm on the.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: You're in the comments section show. You're You're Linda Geist
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: who trolls all of us. Linda Geist with her photo.
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: Her profile photo is like a sunset.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: Because she's bringing some great feelings.
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: I remember going to with Linda Geist and Linda no
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: one fucking knows, but she was like shitting on me,
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: and then she goes, she said something. She goes, I
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: have a husband who I'm golfing with right now. And
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: we drove here in my twenty twenty one Mercedes sal
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: and I was like, no, I'm bored.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: You lost me.
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: She must not have been having too much to say.
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: Where are you on the phone on the golf course.
• 5:22
  Speaker 5: You should be watching your husband's esperato.
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: I literally responded. I was like, I want you to
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: go enjoy golfing with your husband. I want you to
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: know that I've thoroughly enjoyed this interaction and I hope
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: you have a great day.
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: But now I'm just a little bored. And I sent
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: her on her way.
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: It's sad you even had to tell her that.
• 5:39
  Speaker 5: I know what's her name, Linda Geist. She's going to
• 5:43
  Speaker 5: live in my mind for Rentfree me too.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: She was trolling Janet in Mexico.
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: She was like this bitch, and I was like, Linda,
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: she's alive, and well, okay, get Linda on the podcast.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: I don't know she didn't ride into the Hater episode.
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: Bitch, all right, Linda, where we're looking for?
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: Lindsay Hubbard from Summerhouse. I adore her.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: Everyone watched Lindsay's doomed relationship with her ex. His name's Carl.
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: You guys know, for those of you who don't know,
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: his name's Carl Radkey. He has a book coming out.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: He's been sober quite a long time. Very excited to
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: read it. After Carl broke up with her on camera
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: in the finale, what did she do?
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: She found a new man. I got pregnant, a little.
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: Different than what I did.
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: It's okay, though, I too found a man, but I
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: only located as come.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: It's what's so weird?
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: So convenient?
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: I was like, I did find someone just as sperm.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: The best part.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: No, she's thriving' she's a she's another one who I'm like,
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: just how does.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: All of this happen on camera?
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: Like I got lucky, you guys, all of the shit
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: I've been through it happens off camera, and then I
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: have the luxury of just coming on camera to talk
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: about it.
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: It's been great.
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: Everyone else is like, oh, no, I'm getting divorced and
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: we're filming.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: I'm like, that sounds great.
• 7:06
  Speaker 3: You got a storyline without even having to create one.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: No, but I talked about this on the Lover's episode.
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: How annoying it is because when you don't, when you
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: are living a peaceful life. Everyone's like, she's so boring.
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: She's like boring, she's so boring, she doesn't have a storyline.
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: And then when she hits the fan, they're like, she
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: just needs a storyline. I'm like, what can't win? They
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: can't win, go away, giving me whiplash this one. I'm
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: hyped on Teddy Mellencamp. By sharing her melanoma diagnosis, she
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: motivated fans to get regular skin checks, leading many to
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: credit her with catching cancer early.
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: She motivated me, and you did.
• 7:49
  Speaker 5: That's why I like Gerty and Teddy, because, yes, they
• 7:53
  Speaker 5: could have stopped filming, but I think the filming is
• 7:56
  Speaker 5: what made Yes, it's tough, but I feel like you
• 7:58
  Speaker 5: bring so much light to these issues that all of
• 8:00
  Speaker 5: us are have somebody that's going through that. Yeah, you know,
• 8:03
  Speaker 5: so it's good to be aware of it. And I'm
• 8:05
  Speaker 5: glad that they put that in for everybody else to
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: kind of take action for themselves.
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: They're the ones around them to go.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: You need their platform.
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you need to get checked.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: I yeah, you caught you saw something yep, and had
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: that bitch dug out and you go in regularly.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: And when I went in with you.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: If you remember we were talking about why we were
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: coming in, and I said to the doctor, I don't
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: know if you're familiar with Teddy Mellencamp, and he goes,
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: We're all familiar with Teddy Mellencamp because she has single
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: handedly changed the dermatologist game the amount of people who
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: come in to get checked.
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: Now.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: I'm so in awe of her. And although the days
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: are hard for.
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: Her, she shows up. She talks about every hard fucking
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: detail in the midst of fighting for her life. And
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: I told her, and this was months ago, I was like,
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: I hope you you know, and you don't have to
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: text back, but while you're going through the fight of
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: your life, like you're saving people's lives.
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: Absolutely anyway, she's a good one.
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: I like you. She's amazing.
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yes, I'm just emotional today, just like every other day.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: It's not a day unless I cry. I laugh every
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: day and cry every day.
• 9:23
  Speaker 3: My addition's beautiful.
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: Like mom says, God gave you tears for a reason,
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: so I use them.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: So you guys, certainly do.
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: You have a good cry.
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: Mike the situation from Jersey Shore.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: After serving prison time, he openly discussed sobriety, inspiring fans
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: struggling with addiction. I love this too because I don't
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: know if any of you remember.
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: I think your name is Lauren or Lauren.
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I just like everything about both of them.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: The kids will just like the situation makes me so
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: happy every time I see them.
• 9:56
  Speaker 6: I'm like, many situations run around a situation, but I
• 10:03
  Speaker 6: mean the way that the entire cast.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: Really just fucking catapulted into fame, and you would have
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: thought watching that, You're like, these people are going to die.
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: They were partying the way they were.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: Partying, and all of them have like such success stories. Yeah,
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: they're still filming shows.
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: It's so popular.
• 10:27
  Speaker 5: They're like, fuck it, let's just take them to Bora
• 10:28
  Speaker 5: Bora and just do another one of those.
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, like they did a family vacation. Couldn't go anywhere.
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: I'm still got an ankle.
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: Nini Leaks from Real Housewives of Atlanta. She cared for
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: her husband during cancer and brought visibility to caregivers emotional
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: and physical burdens.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: I love Nini Leaks.
• 10:49
  Speaker 4: I heard she's coming back.
• 10:51
  Speaker 5: She is.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: That is real.
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: I could cry.
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: Can I tell you? There is When people ask me,
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: what do you go back and watch? It's always Rony.
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: But the follow up is Atlanta. And I even watched
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: the last season, I didn't feel I rock with housewives
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: no matter what, Like I'm there through the thick and
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: the thin, even in their growing pains, I'm like, I've
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: got this, We're sticking with you. There were some growing pains.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: This last season got a little chaotic. I didn't feel
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: like the cast was meshing. Loved them individually, but it's
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: all about you know, ensemble cast, right, It's like a
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: group of friends. You can't do an episode of Friends
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: without Phoebe or Chandler or Rachel.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: You need them all to be meshing wild.
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: MENI is incredible and I'm so happy the we'll call
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: them wrinkles were ironed out.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: That thrills me.
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: Now we're gonna toot my horn for a second. You
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: said you're gonna read them because I feel stupid.
• 11:51
  Speaker 5: Girl, I've watched you from day one, and any partner
• 11:54
  Speaker 5: with substance will be able to see your growth and accountability,
• 11:57
  Speaker 5: and those are values not just any one can claim.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: I feel seen. That is sweet.
• 12:04
  Speaker 3: That is sweet.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: Anyone taking the time to write me something nice is like,
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: it's good you just it feels good to my heart
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: and soul.
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah, sometimes I need to go.
• 12:15
  Speaker 5: There's been days where I'm like, I'm going to go
• 12:17
  Speaker 5: read the comments section and it makes me feel better.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 12:20
  Speaker 3: I know.
• 12:33
  Speaker 5: Janey Easton's laugh is hilarious. You can't help but to
• 12:37
  Speaker 5: laugh when he laughs. Oh No, Sometimes.
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: I'm like, God, I'm in the annoying and you're like,
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: the fuck keeps laughing. I feel like I'm that guy.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: Kill and Cooper when he hosted the and got like
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: really drunk and I was like, why is that noise coming?
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: And he was in the corner like.
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: That's me, Like I'm at dinner and I'll just die.
• 13:00
  Speaker 5: And the two seconds later I'm like, oh, I got
• 13:02
  Speaker 5: to contain it because I know they're like these fucking.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: Kid over.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: You to stop laughing is like baham, but stop laughing?
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: Who says that?
• 13:11
  Speaker 5: Depending on the left, keep going all right, Kayla Easton's
• 13:16
  Speaker 5: laugh is the best.
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: What the fuck is wrong with people? Yeah, you're damn right,
• 13:20
  Speaker 3: what is wrong with people?
• 13:21
  Speaker 5: I agree that was where it needed to be. Jemma,
• 13:26
  Speaker 5: I loved you from day one.
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: You're real.
• 13:28
  Speaker 5: You stay with your whole chest, you say it with
• 13:31
  Speaker 5: your whole chest. You take accountability. You're a great mom,
• 13:34
  Speaker 5: and your girls are incredible. I love how you keep
• 13:37
  Speaker 5: your mom and brother close and cherish those relationships.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: I do, of course, I do love her.
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: Are you a cigarette?
• 13:49
  Speaker 5: They run out too quick, we all fall asleep, and
• 13:54
  Speaker 5: she goes out and she smokes.
• 13:55
  Speaker 3: A pack of mor Borough by yourself in the.
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: Garage, you old bag?
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: Are you smoking?
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: Really?
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: It's well, but can I tell you something for real?
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: I'm thirty five, which yes, I should very much be
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: like okay by myself.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: But there there is a part of me where.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: Sometimes I feel like I can get into the clouds
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: and my mom and Easton bring me down and center
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: me again. It's like anyone can relate to this who
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: like kind of who has moved away from home. Let's
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: say they move from like Boston to fucking La and
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: then you go home for Christmas and there's just a
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: sense of peace. I get that every day when I
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: go into this big, scary, fucking world of Hollywood. It's disorienting.
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: I feel like I can't breathe and I'm feeling like
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: I'm floundering. And then I get home and I'm like, oh, safety, safety,
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: it feels so good. I can never let you go
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: unless I need a boy to come over. Then you've
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: got a fucking kick for two.
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: Weeks, so go get them.
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: I'm Tiger.
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: Ann. Is that right? Anon? I like an Oh, it's anonymous.
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: I was like, what is this name? It's anonymous. There
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: we go.
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: You should know this word, buddy, Anon.
• 15:27
  Speaker 5: I have never felt more of a parallel life to
• 15:30
  Speaker 5: something I've been able to watch and listen to. I've
• 15:33
  Speaker 5: lost loved ones, been divorced, have had multiple issues with friendships,
• 15:38
  Speaker 5: et cetera. Similar to you. I feel like I'm turning
• 15:41
  Speaker 5: a corner. Even though my season eleven wasn't aired on
• 15:44
  Speaker 5: national television, there was at least one person in the
• 15:48
  Speaker 5: world who was feeling very similar feelings as you. Thank
• 15:51
  Speaker 5: you for your transparency, Thank you for showing your messiness.
• 15:56
  Speaker 5: Thank you for showing your relationship with your brother. I
• 16:00
  Speaker 5: hope you give yourself grace.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: Lala.
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: I love what she said, and it was very kind,
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: and the fact that she took time to write it,
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: or they took time to write it means the world
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: to me.
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: But her basically saying.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: That her season eleven, that chapter in her life was
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: not documented. Filming a show is a blessing and a
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: curse because so many things, Like, as everyone knows, I
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: attribute my beautiful wife to the opportunity I was given
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: on vander Pump roles, What the fuck is wrong with me?
• 16:37
  Speaker 3: Isn't it kind of nice? Though?
• 16:38
  Speaker 5: Like I get what she's saying as well, and it's
• 16:41
  Speaker 5: it is kind of nice for like you guys in
• 16:43
  Speaker 5: a sense of like the filming, I know it's a struggle,
• 16:46
  Speaker 5: but like when it's said and done, that.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: Chapter's kind of closed.
• 16:50
  Speaker 5: Yeah, and you get when we start, but in real
• 16:53
  Speaker 5: life you kind of don't have that, so you never
• 16:54
  Speaker 5: know when you to close your chapter or when that
• 16:57
  Speaker 5: start is to come again. So I feel like for
• 17:00
  Speaker 5: her to like say that, like for her to know
• 17:03
  Speaker 5: that that's her end because not many people.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: But also her acknowledging that there's like my my chapter eleven,
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: my season eleven was documented and will be along for
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: We'll be around for a long time. Like when people
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: say I just started vander Pump Rules, I'm on season
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: eight and I fucking love you, and I'm like.
• 17:27
  Speaker 3: Stop watching perfect that's where it ends.
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: I hope that you continue.
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: You know, did you guys not know this ended season eight?
• 17:36
  Speaker 6: Yeah?
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: But yeah, so I after all of that, I I
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: have tried.
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: And I've said that. I said this in the last episode.
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: I try not to get married to my storyline is
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: what we call it in show terms, but in reality,
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: it's like, that's my reality, right, And I'm sharing a
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: lot of things that could end up on the chopping block.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: And even though there are.
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: Things that are extremely personal to me that have shifted
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: who I am in life, there's a production team that goes, well,
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: it may have shaped you in life, but it's not
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: that entertaining, and so I have to be okay with that.
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: I can't get married to my own story, even though
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: it is creating and shaping me for my future self.
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: So it's very hard and that season and I hate
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: to go back to it all the time, but it's
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: very important that you guys know that that season really
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: changed everything. And it doesn't matter how it changed with
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: the audience, right because we know the audience is fickle.
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: They're like down for you one day, they want to
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: bury you the next. But it changed the way that
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: I like felt about myself and I didn't think in
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: my thirties I would be questioning who are I am?
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: And it was just a lot.
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: It was a long time coming, you know, just making
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: a deal with the devil, having to pay my dues,
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: having to start from scratch, not knowing where I was,
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: being disoriented, having to accept my new reality, and then
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: the overwhelming amount of just pure hatred coming my way.
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: I've never felt more alone in my entire life, like
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: even when my dad passed away. And I hope this
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: doesn't sound horrible or like I don't have my priority straight,
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: but when my dad passed away, it was like, of
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: course I felt lost, but like I had such a community.
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: I had my mom, at my brother. We were all
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: experienced the same thing in different ways. With this, I
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: didn't know how to remedy the situation. I didn't feel
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: like time would make it go away, not the time
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: made my dad's passing go away. Like I'm obviously not
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: the same person, but this fucked with me in like
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: a very specific way, and I'm still trying to like
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: shed it and not go back. Because even on the
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: Lover's podcast, I had a girl say you lost me
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: season eleven, and I'm like fuck, Like I was going
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: through my own set of shit, but it didn't matter
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: because my shit wasn't as important as the other shit,
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: because that was not only great, but it was entertaining.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: My shit wasn't entertaining self discovery and becoming a better person,
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: and my sobriety is not entertaining. You want to know
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: what's entertaining for people, la la relapsing? Now that shit
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: would be fucking covered from top to bottom.
• 20:52
  Speaker 5: It's because it's a train wreck. And everybody rubber next
• 20:55
  Speaker 5: to a car accident. Train wreck we all want. No
• 20:59
  Speaker 5: one looks at a car driving gently across the road,
• 21:02
  Speaker 5: So true, y'all, rubberneck. We want to see an accident
• 21:05
  Speaker 5: and what that comes in your life? Right, But how
• 21:07
  Speaker 5: destructive is your life that we want to watch?
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: I have have created my life to being in this world,
• 21:15
  Speaker 2: separating reality from reality, to be okay with that, to
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: be okay that.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: My story is.
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: Interesting maybe to me and my evolution and what I'm
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: going through, but it may not be entertaining.
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: I have been okay with that.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: This was the first time ever where it's like it
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: needs to be covered because it's showing why I'm reacting
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: the way I'm reacting. But it didn't matter. I keep
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: going back to this, I loop on it. I have
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: stopped looping as much, thank God. But I just have
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: to be okay with it. It's over, it's done. There's
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: nothing I can fucking do, and I just pray to
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: God that me being on the valley, I'm not going
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: to have PTSD if I see negative comments where it
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: takes me back because I've done a lot of work
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: trying to get to a good place, trying to think
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: about how I'm feeling, process and then react off of
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: it that way rather than just aggressively.
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: Just a lot, but you'll come a long way.
• 22:22
  Speaker 3: And that's the other thing.
• 22:23
  Speaker 5: Like, the only way I can put it is when
• 22:25
  Speaker 5: you're feeling these ways and you're going to loop when
• 22:28
  Speaker 5: you look back and I'm only thinking from like when
• 22:29
  Speaker 5: I talk to my sponsor and he's like, well, did
• 22:31
  Speaker 5: you smoke or drink today? And it's like, no, are
• 22:34
  Speaker 5: you that person today? Are you going to lash out
• 22:37
  Speaker 5: like that? No?
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: Maybe, though I don't think.
• 22:40
  Speaker 5: Maybe I don't have a crystal ball like no, but
• 22:43
  Speaker 5: it's not a crystal ball.
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: It's work that you've put in that I see.
• 22:46
  Speaker 5: That's there that the lash out you in season eleven
• 22:50
  Speaker 5: has done a lot of work to now where if
• 22:52
  Speaker 5: you were in that position, you would have not acted
• 22:54
  Speaker 5: like that because you've worked on yourself.
• 22:56
  Speaker 3: I've seen it. There's not a crystal ball I need
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: to see it.
• 22:59
  Speaker 5: Are you going to No, I've seen the work that
• 23:02
  Speaker 5: you've put in to know that you would not. And
• 23:04
  Speaker 5: I've seen it when I was talking about you and
• 23:07
  Speaker 5: when we almost got in the car accident and we
• 23:09
  Speaker 5: were the vape.
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: And I was like, we're going to fucking vape that
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: right there.
• 23:14
  Speaker 5: You would have gotten out of your car and bang
• 23:16
  Speaker 5: the fuck out of the hood and said fuck you.
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: Oh, but you didn't because of the.
• 23:20
  Speaker 5: Work that you have put in since then to now.
• 23:23
  Speaker 5: So I don't need a crystal ball to know that
• 23:25
  Speaker 5: your work has proven that. I appreciate that, of course,
• 23:27
  Speaker 5: so yes, but that is that's boring to everybody. You
• 23:32
  Speaker 5: you're growing as a person until you fall and break
• 23:36
  Speaker 5: a leg. Don't tell me, you know, like, I don't
• 23:39
  Speaker 5: care if you're doing well. Oh my gosh, it's like
• 23:41
  Speaker 5: it's it's crazy. Once I'm feeling better I'm mentally stable,
• 23:45
  Speaker 5: people are like, ah, fuck you the one that's not.
• 23:50
  Speaker 3: I need a train wreck. My life is fine too.
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: I need to watch a mess, you know.
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: I love it so much and I'm so grateful for
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: every single person who took the time to write in.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: Thank you for following on traditionally Lala on Instagram, thank
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: you for giving a shit.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: Thank you for uplifting me today.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: It felt so amazing and really just like touched my heart.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: You filled my cup today. I appreciate you. Guys.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna catch you on Wednesday for a regular old
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: episode and again on Monday for another bonus.
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna laugh today.
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: Please, I do love you. Bye.