Latest / The Nadia Chapman Show / Comfort Is Costly: Stop Negotiating With Your Potential

Transcript

Comfort Is Costly: Stop Negotiating With Your Potential · The Nadia Chapman Show

• 0:06
  Hey, everyone. Welcome to the Nadia Chapman Show. I am back.
• 0:09
  Yes, it's me, Nadia. Who else?
• 0:13
  Holy moly. Life is just so busy these days, so I want to apologize for not releasing
• 0:17
  episodes on a regular basis.
• 0:20
  This is a one-woman show. I do everything on my own, whether it's the workbook
• 0:24
  and my session planning and everything.
• 0:26
  The podcast and my website. And you know, I have two jobs. I'm a mother.
• 0:31
  I've got I'm also a dog mom. No, but I mean, seriously, life is busy.
• 0:35
  And I see you guys, I see you guys, I see that people are listening to the episodes
• 0:39
  and downloading the episodes.
• 0:41
  And it really warms my heart. I see that you guys are following me from around the world.
• 0:46
  Literally, I've got people in Turkey, and then Russia, and Germany and everywhere.
• 0:52
  So anyways, thank you for tuning in.
• 0:54
  Today is just an episode for everyone. I don't care if you are an athlete,
• 0:59
  if you're a teenager, if you just graduated from high school, if you are an old lady.
• 1:05
  I don't care where you're at in your life. You need to listen to this and maybe
• 1:10
  you need to share this episode with somebody who needs to hear this.
• 1:13
  It's about our next level. We all want to achieve things. There's always something
• 1:19
  more that we want out of life.
• 1:20
  And that's okay. You can have a perfect life, but still desire bigger.
• 1:26
  Greater things for yourself.
• 1:27
  And we all know what we want.
• 1:31
  And yet so many people don't take the risk, stay in their little comfort bubble,
• 1:37
  and don't dare to open new opportunities for themselves.
• 1:41
  So today we're talking about just that. And I'm going to warn you,
• 1:45
  if you press play hoping for comfort in this episode or maybe permission to stay where you are.
• 1:51
  This is not the episode.
• 1:53
  This episode is for the people who already know better. All right.
• 1:57
  You know what you should be doing.
• 1:59
  You're not doing it. You know what you've been postponing and you're still postponing it.
• 2:04
  You know exactly where you've been hesitating.
• 2:07
  You're just standing at the edge of your next level. And I know you can feel
• 2:12
  it, that there's a little something missing, a little kick in the butt,
• 2:15
  a little nudge, a little something that you're missing to get you out there and take a leap.
• 2:22
  Because here's what I know after so many years of coaching now,
• 2:26
  whether you are a high performer, an athlete, parent, or just a very driven
• 2:31
  person, when you're truly stuck in life, you feel lost.
• 2:37
  I mean, that even happens to me sometimes.
• 2:39
  And when you're avoiding growth, you feel irritated. We all do.
• 2:44
  We feel restless. We feel edgy. We easily get frustrated with ourselves and
• 2:48
  we start questioning everything.
• 2:50
  And that's not a mindset problem. that's a decision problem.
• 2:53
  There's big difference right there.
• 2:55
  And the next level doesn't come from more clarity necessarily.
• 2:59
  It comes with pressure. It asks more of your discipline, more of your honesty.
• 3:05
  More of your follow through.
• 3:08
  All right. And most people, they don't fail because they can't do the hard things.
• 3:13
  Of course, we've all been through hard things and we can all prove herself, do her things.
• 3:18
  Most people fail because they keep negotiating with themselves for too long.
• 3:22
  I'll start when things calm down. I'll do that when I feel ready.
• 3:26
  I don't have time right now.
• 3:28
  I'm too young. I'm too old.
• 3:30
  And I'm going to tell you, no, what you need is stop stalling because that momentum
• 3:37
  doesn't come, you know, when you sit there and you think more,
• 3:40
  it comes from movement. It comes from taking action.
• 3:44
  That's when the main thing I learned and when I started training to be a life coach.
• 3:47
  So today I wanna talk about something very, very simple and very direct.
• 3:51
  Are you avoiding your next level?
• 3:55
  Not because you're scared, but because it's going to require you to raise your
• 3:58
  standards and to stop letting yourself off the hook. All right.
• 4:03
  If that made your chest tighten a little bit when you heard that, I think it's a good sign.
• 4:09
  It means that this episode is for you.
• 4:13
  So let's land this. The next level is not mysterious. It's not hiding away.
• 4:19
  You know damn right what you want to have in your life.
• 4:22
  It's not waiting for the perfect moment. it's pretty
• 4:25
  obvious in your mind in your heart what you
• 4:28
  want it's the thing that keeps circling again
• 4:31
  and again inside you the thing that you think about maybe in the shower when
• 4:35
  you're driving the thing that comes back every single time that you take a break
• 4:39
  and slow down and here's the thing that nobody wants to hear you don't get to
• 4:44
  the next level by understanding everything and understanding your next level you get there by acting.
• 4:51
  Insights, of course, can change your life and help you, but decision does.
• 4:56
  Decision, making a radical decision can change your life and taking action, of course.
• 5:02
  And the longer you delay a decision that you already know inside of you that
• 5:06
  you need to make, the more energy it freaking drains out of you.
• 5:11
  That's why avoidance feels so exhausting. Not because action is hard,
• 5:16
  but because carrying the weight of not doing it is so heavy.
• 5:21
  So let me ask you a few questions right now and don't answer them quickly.
• 5:25
  All right. Let them land for a bit.
• 5:28
  First one, where have you lowered your standards to stay comfortable?
• 5:33
  That one kind of stings. Second one, where have you been waiting for motivation
• 5:39
  instead of using discipline?
• 5:41
  Because discipline is kind of hard. Discipline kind of sucks sometimes.
• 5:45
  And my last one is where are you choosing familiar over effective?
• 5:50
  Now, here's the shift. You don't need to do everything today or find all the
• 5:54
  answers today. You don't need a five-year plan.
• 5:57
  You don't need a whole layout of every single step.
• 6:01
  You need, and I say this all the time, one decision, one decision that proves
• 6:08
  to yourself that you're serious, one comfortable action,
• 6:11
  one moment to follow through, one little move that says, I don't negotiate with my potential anymore.
• 6:18
  Ha, there's your writer downer for today. I don't negotiate with my potential anymore.
• 6:24
  Because courage is not something that's loud and in everybody's face or on Instagram. It's not dramatic.
• 6:31
  Courage is doing that little one thing that you say you would do,
• 6:36
  even when no one is watching, especially when no one is watching.
• 6:40
  And once you get moving, everything start changing.
• 6:44
  And that's when your momentum will build and your confidence will grow and your
• 6:49
  confidence will follow.
• 6:50
  And then boom, clarity shows up after you act.
• 6:54
  Make that call. Send the message. Show up differently tomorrow morning. New identity.
• 7:01
  New you. Let's go. The next level is already available. It's right there.
• 7:06
  The only question left, really, is whether you're willing to step into it.
• 7:10
  And let me finish with this quick story before we go.
• 7:13
  A while ago, a few years ago, I was coaching a client, incredibly talented,
• 7:18
  very disciplined person, already very successful in her domain and what she does by most standard.
• 7:25
  I mean, on paper, everything looked great.
• 7:28
  Strong results, consistent effort, no major issues.
• 7:31
  But every season, there was the same little pattern that kept showing up.
• 7:36
  She kept saying that she felt off, that she was frustrated with herself.
• 7:40
  Not like a burnout, but kind of confused, wanted more, like irritated with herself.
• 7:45
  And at one point she said, I don't know what's wrong with me.
• 7:49
  I feel like I should be grateful because I've got everything going on for myself,
• 7:53
  but I'm not excited anymore. So I asked her one silly question.
• 7:57
  Was the thing you already know you need to do that you keep avoiding?
• 8:02
  So she laughed, not because it was funny, but because immediately she knew. She knew.
• 8:08
  She told me exactly what it was. The decision, the next move,
• 8:12
  the standard that she didn't raise. And then she said something honest.
• 8:16
  She's like, well, I don't want to deal with how uncomfortable that's going to be.
• 8:20
  And that was the moment. Boom. Because there was nothing wrong with her motivation.
• 8:25
  There was nothing wrong with her mindset and definitely nothing wrong with her discipline.
• 8:30
  She was just trying to stay comfortable in a season that was asking her to grow a lot more.
• 8:36
  So she didn't talk about fear. We didn't analyze the past.
• 8:39
  We didn't wait until she felt ready. She made the decision anyway.
• 8:44
  And here's the part I want you to hear right now.
• 8:47
  Nothing exploded overnight. Nothing magically got easier.
• 8:51
  But within a few weeks, her energy shifted, her confidence came back,
• 8:56
  and she stopped second-guessing herself. Not because the path was smoother,
• 8:59
  but because she stopped arguing with what she already knew.
• 9:03
  And that's what taking things to the next level does.
• 9:06
  It doesn't give you instant comfort. Of course not. It's going to ask you to
• 9:10
  be uncomfortable, but it gives you relief.
• 9:13
  Relief from internal tension and relief from constant mental negotiation.
• 9:18
  Relief from knowing you're finally moving in the direction that you've been
• 9:22
  circling and you've been avoiding for so long.
• 9:25
  So if you're listening to this and something feels familiar,
• 9:28
  that little restlessness, that little edge, that quiet knowing,
• 9:34
  don't label it as stress.
• 9:35
  Please don't label it as burnout.
• 9:38
  Label it accurately. You're being called. All right.
• 9:41
  You don't need to overhaul your whole life today. You don't need to have a perfect
• 9:46
  plan. And you just need that one little honest decision and one action that
• 9:51
  proved to yourself that you're done avoiding and done negotiating with yourself.
• 9:56
  And lastly, I'm going to tell you that next level is not waiting for you to
• 10:01
  feel more ready or feel more confident. It never works that way.
• 10:05
  It's waiting for you to move. Chop, chop.
• 10:08
  So once you do, you won't need motivation anymore. I promise you'll have the momentum you need.
• 10:15
  All right. So save this episode, listen to it again and again so you can process it.
• 10:22
  And go out there and make big shift and big things happen.
• 10:26
  And let me know. Keep me posted. Write me and tell me how it goes.
• 10:30
  All right? You've got this. Thank you so much for listening.