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Sammy Davis | The Christian Reeve Podcast #161 · The Christian Reeve Podcast

• 0:00
  Hello and welcome to another episode of the Christian relief.
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  Podcast, today's guest is a content creator, Community
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  manager, a former computer engineer all the way from Utah
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  and the United States is name is Sammy, Davis, welcome to the
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  show. How you doing?
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  I'm doing well, thank you very much for having me.
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  I'm extremely excited to be here.
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  Oh, I was prescient. No, I'm just a guy with the
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  microphone, man. I don't know what you expect the
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  same here. We have so much in common.
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  No idea. I mean it's funny.
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  You say that actually I really I really enjoy doing this show and
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  I have done. I know that sounds like a weird
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  thing to say because when I first started it was, I was
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  still trying to figure it out. So try to understand that what
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  this show is. And even to this day, when
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  people ask me, I will just kind of automatically say, okay, it's
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  a discussion show, it's an interview show, it's a general
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  conversation, but I think the key thing I'm trying to get to
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  is like life stories and Tapping into like what what makes people
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  tick, you know, because that's where you get like the real
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  interesting stuff because everyone has a fascinating life,
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  doesn't matter who you are. You know, I've had people on the
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  show that, you know, they'll turn around and be like, go my
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  life's, not that interesting. And then we have an amazing
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  conversation. And to me the important things
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  are like being a wanting to have a conversation, that's key, I
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  wanting to and to, you know, get just get comfortable getting in
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  a place where you feel Feel, you know, relaxed and able to have a
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  conversation and three. The idea actually came for me
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  from like about a year or two ago when I was thinking about
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  like what you know, if I ever had as like a celebrity on the
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  show, for example, like how would I interview them?
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  Because, you know, there's going to be like a million things that
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  they've already answered whatever.
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  So, how would you approach it? And in my mind, it's like, okay,
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  will you ask them about what they're passionate about and you
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  get to know them on a deeper level.
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  You don't ask the Stuff. You'd expect to know you try
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  and, you know what I mean? And that's I try to apply that
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  to every single show. Now I will of course have like
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  those generic questions Talking Points.
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  Try you know, but I'm I don't I'm not even really looking for
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  an answer for those particular things.
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  I'm trying to just kind of get to the interesting stuff and
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  then get get conversation flowing and then that's when you
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  get to the good stuff just to warn you.
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  I I have limited social interactions so I might might
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  just have an honesty dump within the first five minutes.
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  I might just blurt out a bunch of embarrassing things and you
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  might love it and I'll be sitting there thinking about it
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  later thinking, why did I say any of that?
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  So what you're saying is you're a bit of an over-thinker
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  oversharer? Is that right?
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  Yes to both. Yes.
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  To both overthinking is one of my specialties every X.
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  That I've had will complain that I will go into silence.
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  I will essentially shut my mouth.
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  Look out a window and close myself off.
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  And they think that I'm avoiding them or that I'm upset.
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  And what's actually happening is my brain has taken over and it
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  is essentially said, where can I point my eyes?
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  So then I'm not distracted. And my brain just processes
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  whatever is going through and I usually can't tell them what I'm
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  thinking about because I don't know what I'm thinking about.
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  It's just a string of ideas that just keep coming through.
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  Some of them will stick and that's how I sometimes make
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  content most of the time. I'm just overthinking in
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  general, just over thinking about whatever is happening in
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  the world. When did it start for you?
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  When did you start kind of overthinking?
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  And then recognizing maybe it's a bit of a problem.
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  I would say, junior high. I was young, I was maybe 13 14
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  somewhere around that age. I was one of those gifted
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  children where academics came easy.
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  So usually I wouldn't be paying attention in school.
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  Because it got boring. I already knew what they were
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  talking about, so I would think about other things and I would
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  get called out for it. And the problem with, you know,
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  living in your own head, is that, as a reflex, you're not
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  very good at answering. Whatever question was asked to
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  you, but given 30 seconds to process and think about it it's
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  pretty easy to get back on subject in the sale.
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  I know what we're talking about, but I would get in trouble
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  because teachers would want the reflexive answer, they would
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  want to know what year was the fall of Rome.
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  And, you know, I would need to look that up or think about it
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  at that time. I had a similar program in
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  school as well. Accept it was different for me.
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  I was frustrated with certain subjects and I was very
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  argumentative and rude, but I would just frustrate, I was just
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  frustrated, you know? Yeah.
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  And I think that's the problem when you because school is is
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  frustrating for us all because it's just so poorly managed and
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  you know, it's just stupid to have like one thing and expect
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  everyone to operate within the confines of this way of thinking
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  and way of approaching things and it's archaic as well.
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  Like, for instance, it's been those people in my community
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  that 16 now and they're doing their gcses.
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  Shout out the meds and she won't watch this.
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  She doesn't listen. To the podcast.
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  And I'm hearing her talk about it like, you know, like the
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  difficulty she's having with it. Just how frustrating it and
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  she's a really, really smart girl.
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  So she'll have no problems when the grades eventually can't, but
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  she's having frustrations with it.
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  And I'm hearing like the things she's saying I'm like, oh my
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  God, like it hasn't changed in when I do my gcses like 15 years
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  ago, 10 years ago. Whatever.
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  And that's the thing. It was dated when I was at
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  school. Hmm.
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  And again it goes on and on like it's probably dated back to let
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  this 70s or They just keep like the same education system and
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  tweak things here and there but there's wider problems and I
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  feel like there's very few teachers.
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  I mean, okay, maybe it's changed these eggs, but back when I was
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  at school, there was very few teachers that actually want to
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  teach you. And I remember my mom, once said
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  to me, you know, sometimes when we be arguing and because I was,
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  I was a smart kid and she knew that and I think there were
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  time. I remember once she turned round
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  to me a few times, you turn around to me and said this,
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  where she'd be, like, what did I just say?
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  And then I realize I'm repeat, I repeat it back to her verbatim
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  and she'd be like, but what did I mean?
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  It's like, ah, because that's and that's the key.
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  That's what real listening is. You're not listening for the
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  word. That being said, you're
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  listening for the deeper meaning and that's to an extent what the
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  teachers are trying to do as well.
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  But then again it depends if Really trying to reach you.
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  Then more often that you will give them your time a day
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  because you realize they're trying to do that but when it's,
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  as you say, reciting, facts from books and it's boring and there
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  were so many kids, I met like yourself who lived in their own
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  world and it would frustrate me as well, because they would the
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  school's trying to push them into a box.
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  That I remember there was a, there was a kid that I met who
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  was an amazing artist and I'd say to him all the time, are you
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  dude you got turn us into a Comic got turned into a comic
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  and it always is very non talal. Yeah, you know, is, is a common
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  alternative comic, whatever you know, like you knew he was gonna
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  do something with it, but he would be sitting there like in
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  maths doing this. We're in the same math class and
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  we were both crap at math. So I think he's a bit better
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  than me but like we both shit and he was always so good about
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  it and we would talk about his art from time to time.
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  And he'd tell me how frustrated he was in art class because
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  they've constantly be telling him you have to do this, this
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  and this and forget the stuff you're doing now.
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  Is that by want to do this? Yeah, it's always that trying to
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  put you in a box. What is?
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  Yeah. You know I have been struggling
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  with that very question. A lot recently.
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  I've been having some employment issues and I am starting to
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  think that the problem is me that I am to me for my own good
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  because I don't, I don't like to sugarcoat things.
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  Things. I don't like to say, what people
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  want to hear, I like to say, what is true?
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  Or at least true for me. And if it is incorrect, I would
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  like to hear why it is incorrect as opposed to just espousing the
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  views of someone else, because that's what they want to hear.
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  And it seems as though school is teaching us to be prepared for a
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  work environment where our bosses will want to.
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  To be miniature versions of them.
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  So we need to learn early to be miniature versions of the
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  teachers who are our current bosses.
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  So that later in life we can mirror other people more
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  accurately. And I've, you know, I've been
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  studying taoism as a spiritual philosophy and one of its key
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  points is to remove yourself to find the truest version of
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  yourself. So instead of saying, well, I
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  desire to be this way, or I think I'm this type of person
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  you instead just kind of empty your brain while the noise which
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  is extremely hard for a person like me and just speak off, you
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  know, whatever comes to mind, just let it out and see where it
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  goes. You essentially trust the, I
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  don't remember all the psychology terms I think it was
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  like ID is the Just one you trust that voice as opposed to
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  trusting the ego you disconnect from self to find, true self,
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  and true self. May not be very attractive to a
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  lot of people. You know, it may not be the best
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  thing in the world but at the same time, I think everybody's
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  got a right to exist in this world.
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  Everyone's got a special and unique voice.
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  And if we say certain voices, cannot be heard, Third, I don't
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  know. I think it puts us into deeper
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  problems, you know. Why do you think you're the
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  problem? I mean, that's so I think I am
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  struggling to find work because I know what people want from a
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  worker and I just don't want to be that.
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  And so there, you know, the little voice in my head says,
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  well if you know the answer, then do the answer but then
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  another It's in my head is like, but you don't believe in the
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  answer. The answer sucks.
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  Do the answer, you believe it be yourself, not who they want you
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  to be. Yeah, I mean sounds to me about
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  the issue is more that you just need to find like your people
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  and the right place to work or maybe even sup your own thing.
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  I mean, this is my be nice, dude.
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  This is something I can relate to spend many years doing
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  customer service jobs, and then I do corporate marketing and now
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  I'm freelance. Now I work for myself and I
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  still have clients that I have to deal with a little bit of
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  that call. Stuff.
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  But it's on my terms. I can leave whenever I want.
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  I'm freelance. And I was scared to take that
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  leap. Quite honestly, for years, and
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  then I took it and the more important thing I learned from
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  it, which I think relates to your situation.
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  And where you're at in your life is I took that leap into
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  something that I was scared of. I was scared of, because I
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  thought, and I said this in the last show, though there is this
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  fear in my mind, like, Oh, They'll be no job security like
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  oh, Oh, you know, dear Carrie and it's like the reality is.
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  There's no security in any job, anything you do in like there's
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  no secure, there's no such thing.
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  It's true. You can train yourself to be
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  careful with money. You can train yourself to.
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  I think a better idea these days.
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  And this is what the advice I always give people is to just
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  maximize your Revenue opportunities across all boards.
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  Try to like, you know, the old expression.
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  Don't put all your eggs in one basket.
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  Try to spread them everywhere. No, see work more is like a
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  field of opportunities as opposed to just like I have a
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  job. I mean, it's not the 50s, you
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  know, you don't work for the job till you die and you get a
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  golden watch and then they kicked out the door, like life
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  isn't like that anymore and even when it was, it sucked because
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  it's like, Euro. But that and that's the thing
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  you made a good point before about how the school system is
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  designed to train workers. What that's a really big problem
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  because Society is different. Now, you've got all these ideas
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  of that pushing Able to be entrepreneurs, pushing
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  empowerment, pushing this bushing that that contradicts
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  with go to university, go to a job.
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  Go to the like is and I mean for instance, look at the job
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  market, I wager, it's probably the same in the states as it is
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  here in the UK where it used to be that, you know, staying in a
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  company for a long time, was a good thing, you know.
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  And and now it's like now I mean two years or a year and a half
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  is considered too long almost it's anywhere from six months to
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  a year. Yeah, especially If it's the
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  same position for that period of time.
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  Yeah I mean that's just it's just life is changed, the world
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  has changed. And with that in mind I mean
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  look at what the pandemic show. Does it showed us that?
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  You know we don't need to work in offices anymore.
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  Who says like, you know there I'm like and all the
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  productivity studies showed that working from home is way more
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  productive and I can speak to that.
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  I work remotely and I get way more done than I ever did
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  working in offices because and you know the funniest part about
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  That is like a lot of people that contradict and say that,
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  you know, working in offices more productive.
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  Those people clearly never worked in the offices.
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  I had to work in where people were screaming and it's too loud
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  but I had to go to other floors of like offices just so I could
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  get some peace. So I'm old enough to to have
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  been my first full-time job which you know really wasn't
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  that long ago but it was as a writer and Everybody had a
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  desktop which meant you worked at your cubicle.
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  You did your eight hours of writing at a specific place and
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  it was frustrating because writers are social, most of the
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  time and I tend to think of work as a punishment like, I am, I am
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  in prison for eight hours and the way to get out of prison is
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  to do my job for those eight hours.
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  So that no one can say he didn't do.
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  Enough when I decide to leave after 8 hours is finished.
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  So I would be at work and people would come up and they'd want to
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  chat about whatever movie came out or sometimes sports, but I
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  don't like sports. So usually, it was very easy to
• 16:05
  drown them out when they would talk sports because I'm like, I
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  don't care, but it was still a distraction to hear human
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  voices, laughing and chatting, and having a good time.
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  And I don't Spike them for having a good time.
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  I just couldn't get work done in that environment.
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  So, about two years into that job, we got laptops and no one
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  was at their desk. It was a complaint for
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  management. They could never find us at our
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  desk and it was like, because we're untethered, we're free,
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  some of us want to work in a coffee shop, some of us want to
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  work in the library one dude. Wanted to work in in front of
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  the office building underneath a tree.
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  We just found the places that We like to work and even though the
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  managing editors did not understand that work environment
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  productivity shot up you know it used to be one set of Articles
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  needed to be turned in within three weeks and then we would
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  move on to the next thing. Once we got laptops and could
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  work on our own schedule, we would get our work done within a
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  week or a week and a half and so we needed more work to write
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  about and It shouldn't have been seen as a threat that we had
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  become more productive with freedom.
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  But there's still people today were like, you need to be in the
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  office for most of the day. Otherwise, how do we know it's
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  just a control thing that it's no different from school?
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  Like I'm sorry but when they would turn around and be like,
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  you need to be at school and you need to study from these hours
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  that he's ours, and this is the most productive way to do to
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  bullshit school. Would be so much better if it
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  was like Four hours a day because I tell you what, even if
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  it was, let's say it was hypothetically was like four
• 17:53
  hours or five hours, something like that, right?
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  I'm willing to put money on the fact that it would be much more
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  productive. And actually, I recommend school
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  kids would actually enjoy School more.
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  If it was, it was changed. Switched up.
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  I think, I think a key thing as well is adapting to lots of
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  different people like in this, like school is a great metaphor
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  for how the workplace should should be.
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  And they both can be changed in many ways.
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  Because if you're in a good workplace, They will Embrace who
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  you are and how you work and adjust to you, not the other way
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  around. Like, if you constantly have to
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  adjust yourself to someone else, they're not really getting the
• 18:30
  best return on their investment. And school is the same at the
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  company. The company I work for like I
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  butt heads a little bit with certain people, but at the end
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  of the day like we have the same goals and we and He's a healthy
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  dialogue. You know like I'll say what I
• 18:49
  think they'll say what they think.
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  You know there might be there might like I'm holding to them
• 18:54
  as far as like the contract is concerned so it's okay.
• 18:57
  I will do what they say but I'll at least tell them what I think
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  and why I think okay this might work, this might not work but
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  then we go ultimately with what they want and it worked at least
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  there's that platform and there's a conversation it's not
• 19:12
  like school with the like no shut up.
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  Do it at all. That's just her going to the
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  principal because that's the thing is, if you employ someone,
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  you should be near, you know, employing them with the idea
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  that you're taking on their knowledge and expertise and
• 19:25
  everything like you shouldn't, it shouldn't be.
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  Otherwise you just renting someone's carcass.
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  And you know, see and I think it was jobs are just renting
• 19:36
  someone's body their physical form, right?
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  Because in their eyes they have the Process.
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  They just need someone to do said process.
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  I will add to another. It depends on the job.
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  You know, if it is like working in a supermarket or Amazon
• 19:55
  fulfillment center or something, I understand, you know, it's you
• 19:59
  got a to be whatever and you know what?
• 20:02
  Like I think it speaks to the different types of people.
• 20:04
  We are, I know people that have worked in things like retail for
• 20:08
  years and they love it hospitality and they love it.
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  Great. But here's the thing you can't
• 20:12
  expect everyone to love the same thing.
• 20:15
  Yeah, I've met the foot reverse, I met people that absolutely
• 20:18
  hate the office prefer practicality practicals, prefer
• 20:23
  more like physical jobs, and vice versa.
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  We're all different and we all need to go for what works for us
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  and what makes sense for us. And that's exactly how school
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  should be and bring it back to yourself.
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  I mean, yeah, I don't think the issue is you.
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  I think the issue is, you know, finding places that that work
• 20:43
  for you. You know, I agree with that, I
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  agree with that completely. And it's interesting that you
• 20:49
  bring it up because I think a lot of the issues that we are
• 20:53
  dealing with today. All Trace back to this idea of a
• 21:00
  monoculture where humans need to fit into what we have discussed.
• 21:05
  Well, what someone has decided is the correct culture and
• 21:09
  humans are just too different to do that.
• 21:13
  That's what makes us great. Eight as a species is that we
• 21:17
  are highly individualistic yet able to work as a community and
• 21:25
  it's through that individual nature of our being that we're
• 21:31
  able to see problems differently and offer Solutions in a way
• 21:34
  that someone else never would have thought of.
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  And so if we've got a system that says, no, we need people
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  thinking this way. We're limiting ourselves weird.
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  Getting rid of everything that made us great to begin with.
• 21:49
  I mean, I covered this a little bit in.
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  I did a standalone episode, sometimes I do topic-based
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  episode. So I just speak at length on the
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  topic and I spoke about multi potentiality and Plymouth e and
• 22:04
  be familiar with those just know, okay?
• 22:06
  Basically quick rundown, it's basically multi, potentiality is
• 22:10
  just another way of saying someone who has like skills and
• 22:14
  interests and a lot. Different areas.
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  And then Plymouth e is I've being an expert in all those
• 22:19
  different fields. So for instance, if someone is
• 22:22
  like an accomplished writer and also a singer then that you,
• 22:27
  maybe you could call them up and a polymath.
• 22:30
  And historically, there used to be this idea of the renaissance,
• 22:33
  man, you know, this idea that most people in society were
• 22:37
  expected to be skilled in a range of different areas.
• 22:40
  So, it was an expectation particular in Europe that you,
• 22:43
  you know, spoke several languages.
• 22:45
  In rights were accomplished musician, and orator, whatever.
• 22:49
  Like, all these different things Society changed, obviously for
• 22:52
  many, many years, hundreds of years, we lived in the age of
• 22:55
  the Specialists, and, you know, that is very clear and still
• 22:59
  exists in the form of things. Like, you know, being an
• 23:02
  electrician, being a plumber, whatever, you know, it's,
• 23:04
  there's always going to be room for specialism, but Society at
• 23:08
  large and many jobs out there, expect people now to be I
• 23:15
  suppose polymaths or multipotentialites in that
• 23:18
  you're expected to do a lot of different things and be a master
• 23:21
  in all those things. And that's just, that's not
• 23:23
  realistic. Yeah, you you it's possible to
• 23:27
  be to be to be good in several areas.
• 23:29
  But I think and you know, especially in the workplace like
• 23:34
  you think about any project management things you've been
• 23:36
  involved in any teams like the best teams are a collection of
• 23:41
  people that are experts in different fields, you come
• 23:44
  together. And it's like, okay, we'll share
• 23:47
  ideas from our unique specialisms or whatever and we
• 23:51
  come together and we create something but we go away and
• 23:54
  work on that thing ourselves, right?
• 23:57
  And and like that, I've seen it so many times when like if you
• 24:00
  try and get everyone on the same page like you got 20 sales do
• 24:05
  you have some ideas for the it guys?
• 24:07
  Like what? No like this?
• 24:09
  No like I mean that like if it's like an open Forum, like we need
• 24:13
  ideas, everyone, please. Tribute.
• 24:15
  I get that but it's like to a certain extent.
• 24:18
  Like if you're a specialist in a particular area, it makes sense
• 24:22
  to stay in that lane in and focus on that right.
• 24:25
  And and think if you don't, if you don't do that, can come very
• 24:30
  convoluted and it can, you know, just waste time and it's just,
• 24:35
  it doesn't work. But as you said, like, when we
• 24:38
  come together and we come together in a way that Embraces,
• 24:42
  the things that we're able to, Offer then we're able to share
• 24:47
  that and in any team situation you've ever been in, like I know
• 24:51
  you said you hate sports but Sports is a good example, you
• 24:54
  know, because it's like everyone has their positions and they
• 24:58
  focus in those positions. But then they also come together
• 25:01
  as a team and, you know, they do a tax, they do defense.
• 25:04
  They move together as a unit and they have like a shared
• 25:08
  understanding of their roles and how they fit in the team and how
• 25:11
  they work together, to achieve their goals and it's no
• 25:13
  different in Work and school and whatever, but yeah, as you said
• 25:18
  like, every human being is different and you know, I had
• 25:22
  it. I had, I still said this on a
• 25:25
  podcast quite a few times. So I do apologize for repeating
• 25:28
  this but it makes me laugh. All these years later thinking
• 25:32
  about the things they said to me in school, like you talk too
• 25:35
  much Christian, you need to stop talking too much, you need to
• 25:38
  stop asking questions. Stop asking question, you ask
• 25:41
  too many questions? Imagine that imagine.
• 25:43
  Yeah. We need to do as human beings,
• 25:48
  ask questions and expand our knowledge may be doing too much
• 25:51
  of that. That's the thing.
• 25:52
  It was it was all designed for what you said to put you in a
• 25:56
  box and keep you there. And that's what they expect you
• 26:00
  to do. Because they want to prepare you
• 26:02
  for the 925. Well, you know, look, not
• 26:04
  everyone's going to work a 9 to 5.
• 26:06
  Now everyone's going to do shift work, like I've done both and I
• 26:10
  hate them both. And I didn't know my, I did them
• 26:12
  to my the best of my ability but it was Soul destroying, and it
• 26:16
  wasn't me. And that's why I'm pursuing
• 26:18
  acting was acting music podcast in whatever, like and it's not
• 26:23
  conventional, it's not easy. It's a different life and I have
• 26:27
  accepted that, and it's scary. Sure.
• 26:29
  But it's I've accepted that I can't do.
• 26:32
  If I don't do that, I can't be happy in life.
• 26:35
  And I think, Going back to the bigger point of all of this is
• 26:39
  that you know you got you, you said it you got you got to be
• 26:43
  true to who you are. You can't be something.
• 26:46
  You're not, you have to be who you are.
• 26:49
  And if you find yourself in those situations, like you said
• 26:51
  that, you you going into these jobs and you're thinking, oh,
• 26:54
  maybe I'm the problem, you know, I'm just not fitting into this.
• 26:57
  It's no bullshit. Like sure, we need to grow and
• 27:01
  change as as human being. Yeah.
• 27:03
  All the time. But it's like when you're a kid
• 27:07
  and you've got a puzzle set and you put the try to force a piece
• 27:11
  where it doesn't belong. It's like that's not your fault,
• 27:15
  you know, it kind of comfort. Maybe that was bad analogy bit,
• 27:19
  you know, like pieces fault. Maybe yeah, where it doesn't
• 27:24
  belong. Exactly.
• 27:25
  Yeah, it's like When I started like chasing the things.
• 27:32
  That felt right for me like acting and voice acting and like
• 27:36
  I have so much fun with it. There's so much fun, it feel.
• 27:41
  It feels right, you know, done, I've done some live-streamed
• 27:44
  recently where I've kind of it because, you know, I go back and
• 27:49
  forth. I've had quite a tumultuous
• 27:51
  couple of years and there's been a lot of Life Lessons Learned by
• 27:54
  think. The key is understanding exactly
• 27:58
  who you are. What is it that I offer?
• 28:02
  What? And not just in work but in life
• 28:06
  because I think those things go hand-in-hand.
• 28:08
  I know sometimes people go all life private life and work life
• 28:11
  or two separate things. Yes, they are.
• 28:15
  But how you approach them isn't necessarily different because
• 28:20
  you're still that same person. There was different side of you,
• 28:23
  you know, obviously there's professionalism and Business
• 28:26
  Christian for instance, is different from personal
• 28:29
  Christian, but the same time. That zest for life that you
• 28:36
  might have is going to be the same across all boards, and
• 28:39
  that's how it should be, you know?
• 28:44
  I was always just think that life is much better.
• 28:47
  When you've truly Embrace who you are and I feel like it gets
• 28:52
  easier. Yeah.
• 28:54
  Life is always going to be tough and it's always going to throw
• 28:56
  you. Yeah challenges, but you're
• 28:58
  still going to be able to Make the best of the situation, if
• 29:03
  you're embracing exactly who you are.
• 29:07
  Yeah, I definitely can see all of that, you know, I it's funny
• 29:10
  that you mention all this. Now I'm starting to think maybe
• 29:13
  I'm like a year behind you in terms of life because I am going
• 29:19
  through the shit. If you forgive my, my foul
• 29:23
  language. But you know, think life.
• 29:26
  It has all these ups and downs and I am putting a smile on my
• 29:30
  face as personally. I feel like I'm at one of my
• 29:34
  bottoms, I'm sorry. Well, you know, it's just one of
• 29:38
  those things where it's like I've had a lot of performance
• 29:42
  training and whatnot and one of the things that I was taught at
• 29:45
  least in radio, is that even if life sucks, if you put a smile
• 29:50
  on your face, your energy will go up and you're more likely to
• 29:53
  succeed at whatever you're doing, in my case being
• 29:57
  performance. I if you if you have the
• 30:02
  patience for it and this is to anyone who is listening on.
• 30:06
  My Tick Tock if you scroll far enough down and you find that I
• 30:13
  still have a long beard, you'll hear that.
• 30:17
  I'm I sound very depressed. I sound very down and it's
• 30:23
  because I was and I didn't know how to hide it and I don't
• 30:28
  always know how to hide it. I don't know if I always should
• 30:32
  hide, but If I want to entertain people, if I want to get someone
• 30:38
  smiling, if I want to tell a joke, that gets someone to
• 30:42
  laugh, I at least have to put a smile on my face.
• 30:46
  You know, it's the sad clown thing where like like, yeah, the
• 30:52
  clown is sad, but you still laughed at them.
• 30:54
  And that was really all the clown needed at least for me.
• 31:01
  This is an interesting point that you raised, because It's
• 31:03
  actually again, something like I connect with you on thing.
• 31:12
  Well, firstly, I don't think you should ever be hiding or trying
• 31:17
  to put your pain into a box and put it away, like you got to
• 31:22
  embrace that ship and like that's The embrace it.
• 31:28
  Now, you gotta, you gotta embrace it now, it becomes a
• 31:32
  bigger problem later, you know, it's like true.
• 31:36
  And yeah, I don't believe in all that stuff that Society tells us
• 31:41
  like keeping it in, and I will just go away eventually
• 31:44
  bullshit. Like, and and you did, there's a
• 31:46
  lot of stuff counter counter active to that, that, that has
• 31:52
  come out in more recent decades that says, you know, you should
• 31:55
  let it out. And, you know, you things will
• 31:58
  get easier if you do that. And it's, when it comes to being
• 32:02
  a content creator, like yourself, I mean, Is why do is
• 32:09
  to just if it gets that bad take time for yourself to you know go
• 32:14
  away for a while but be be at one with yourself reconnect,
• 32:18
  embrace it, you know, if you need to cry cry, if you need to
• 32:21
  be angry, be angry, whatever. And come back when you, you
• 32:24
  know, feel yourself again because I do agree with you that
• 32:27
  and I've said this to my community online, that one of
• 32:32
  the mistakes I've made is to come sometimes online.
• 32:37
  When I'm not feeling that my best.
• 32:38
  And, and, and it for selfish reasons, like I actually came
• 32:43
  sometimes to do lives, when live streams, when, when I've been at
• 32:47
  my lowest point because I actually wanted to feel better.
• 32:49
  And I thought by doing that, I might feel better, and sometimes
• 32:53
  that's true. But most of the time, it's not
• 32:55
  because you can't, you know, I think we're kind of similar
• 33:00
  people in that, we wear our heart on my sleeve and you can't
• 33:02
  hide there. And because of that, it's like,
• 33:05
  obviously you have people that care.
• 33:06
  Are about you online. Subscribe to your stuff and
• 33:09
  start and they look at that, they're not all what's wrong and
• 33:12
  then you bring them down and that's how it's okay.
• 33:16
  It's okay. In the sense that like those are
• 33:18
  good people just trying to be supportive and but It's like,
• 33:24
  and I hate bringing anyone down but I just say, I'm fine with
• 33:30
  being miserable and I am fine with opening up to friends about
• 33:34
  being miserable, right? Yeah, but when I am trying to
• 33:38
  entertain like if I'm going on Twitch, I do that four nights a
• 33:42
  week. I've got to bring the energy up.
• 33:47
  I don't know if a stranger is going to watch me for the first
• 33:49
  time, you know what I mean? And so, So, I don't want them to
• 33:54
  come away thinking. Okay, the type of content this
• 33:57
  guy makes is relatable, but it's relatable in a way.
• 34:01
  That's kind of bringing me down. I want to be relatable, but I'd
• 34:06
  rather be relatable in a way, that puts a smile on your face.
• 34:09
  And, and you know, does it suck that?
• 34:13
  I feel dishonest at times when I'm like, I can't tell people
• 34:18
  that I'm frustrated by this or that sometimes it does.
• 34:21
  But in other Cases, it helps immensely.
• 34:26
  I don't have a troll problem. I say that now.
• 34:30
  And who knows? Maybe next week suddenly I'll
• 34:32
  have a bunch of trolls but it's because I took something away
• 34:36
  from Community Management which is to not engage.
• 34:42
  If someone has a problem with me personally, I will try to figure
• 34:45
  it out but if they're just coming at me because they don't
• 34:48
  like what I had to say, I just ignore it, I don't delete it.
• 34:52
  It, I don't like it. I don't comment on it.
• 34:55
  I know. I usually don't do a video reply
• 34:58
  but I did do one and I feel a little guilty about it.
• 35:03
  I I just like a duck. I just let it run like water off
• 35:08
  my back. I would rather not believe they
• 35:12
  exist. And I think that if I allowed my
• 35:18
  depression to take charge like if IL, if I was a bit Open about
• 35:24
  when I am down. I think I would be a bit more
• 35:26
  competitive. I think I would, I would want to
• 35:29
  pick more fights especially with trolls because I'd be like ah,
• 35:34
  you came at me when I am miserable in?
• 35:36
  No, I will come at you with with all of my anger and that's just
• 35:43
  not my brand, you know, like I'm aiming for positivity and
• 35:50
  kindness and and so, even though, you know, I'm suffering
• 35:56
  from depression, it could be a lot worse for what I'm aiming
• 36:02
  for, if I really engaged with it and the way that I used to, you
• 36:07
  know, I agree. I disagree with your point about
• 36:11
  being dishonest. I think, if you go in, like, you
• 36:14
  can never tell if you're going How can I phrase this sometimes?
• 36:22
  Yeah, life. You just go through stuff and
• 36:24
  you got a Content. Like and I've said this on lives
• 36:27
  before, like if things, get too much in my personal life or my
• 36:31
  life in general, I just die do less online.
• 36:34
  Like you just won't see me for a while and do stuff as much until
• 36:38
  things, settle bow, tie down and, you know, one of the
• 36:41
  mistakes. I was making as I said before
• 36:42
  was coming online, feeling that way.
• 36:44
  And bringing people down or or just, just not as you said, I
• 36:49
  doing what you promised, like, and everyone has a different
• 36:53
  brand of car of stuff that they do, but I think, Sounds to me
• 36:59
  like we're quite similar people in that they most at most of the
• 37:02
  time with this. Yeah, right.
• 37:05
  But then the danger with wood, being a high-energy positive
• 37:09
  person is that when the low hits, oh my fuck is it low like
• 37:14
  because it's like all or nothing.
• 37:16
  There's no air between it's like evos and if people came to you,
• 37:20
  when you were up here and now they're seeing you down here,
• 37:24
  right? They start thinking like, oh
• 37:27
  man, something is Wrong. And it's like, no I'm a human
• 37:31
  being and I have ranges and you usually get to see this upper
• 37:38
  range where energy is high and I am doing well.
• 37:42
  But every once in awhile, you know, the other side's will come
• 37:46
  out. One of the things that that I
• 37:49
  have not experienced and I have to tell people this often
• 37:53
  because I worry that it's going to happen.
• 37:57
  I've got a big physical Uncle touch guy like especially with
• 38:00
  strangers. So, you know, I'm all about
• 38:03
  Knuckles, but when a new person starts talking to me, my natural
• 38:09
  reaction is to think, what did I do wrong?
• 38:12
  Like what are they about to yell at me about because you know the
• 38:16
  only interactions I've had for most of my life especially with
• 38:20
  strangers have been either judges or bosses or management
• 38:25
  and usually when they get brought into the conversation,
• 38:28
  It's because I'm a problem. So, I've got this Shield that I
• 38:32
  keep up and, and so, you know, you see me online and vivacious
• 38:38
  and easygoing even if I'm in a good mood, if I've never spoken
• 38:43
  to you before, and you come up to me in person that Shield is
• 38:47
  going way up. I'm probably not going to say
• 38:51
  much. I might smile and Nod but for
• 38:54
  the most part, I'm sitting here thinking, all right?
• 38:57
  When's the other foot going to do.
• 38:58
  Drop when, when are they going to say?
• 39:00
  But there was this one time and you made it all miserable life
• 39:08
  life does weird things to us. It trains Us in different ways.
• 39:12
  No, I can't. What you mean.
• 39:13
  Are you? I suffer from anxiety.
• 39:15
  And I've had, I still have this that I mean I'm managing it a
• 39:20
  little bit better now but when there's a confrontation my body
• 39:24
  just goes into like shocked. comes from childhood, and it's
• 39:30
  kind of It's ridiculous. I won't go into details about it
• 39:37
  because I've been spreading about it many times on the show
• 39:40
  before suffice to say what happens in your childhood.
• 39:45
  And in your early years, I mean, pay attention to that because
• 39:49
  that's that really does shape how you become as an adult.
• 39:52
  And I think I think it's what one thing I've learned recently
• 39:56
  is, you know, you really got to just be kind to everyone and
• 40:00
  patient with everyone because you just have, you know?
• 40:03
  I did what they're going through what they've been through
• 40:05
  excetera and, you know, like well in frankly, you don't know
• 40:10
  who's watching you. That's true.
• 40:13
  So there's there's two sides to it.
• 40:15
  There is the side of you don't know what, what they are going
• 40:18
  through, which is a huge side of it.
• 40:22
  People have bad days and no one wants to be judged for their bad
• 40:27
  days. Because the next day, they're
• 40:29
  having a good day and if you come up in your like, you were a
• 40:32
  total Bastard. They're going to be like dude,
• 40:35
  you just brought me down. I'm having a good day.
• 40:37
  I'm vibing. I'm I'm relaxing.
• 40:39
  I'm having a great time and you're telling me I'm a bastard
• 40:42
  like screw that noise. So in the same way that you
• 40:48
  don't know what other people are going through, or what their
• 40:50
  normal is. You also got to remember you
• 40:54
  don't know who's watching and you might be coming into
• 40:57
  confrontation thinking, I will be Superman and I will save the
• 41:02
  day. You might have eyes on you and
• 41:06
  they're seeing Lex Luthor running in and ruining
• 41:11
  everything, you know. So I, I am pretty conflict a
• 41:15
  verse, but when I do get involved, usually the attitude
• 41:19
  that I take is, I don't know, all the information and none of
• 41:23
  this is going to matter next week, at least that's the hope.
• 41:30
  You know, there are obviously Ian's where it matters in a
• 41:35
  week, but in most situations most conflicts, you know, it's
• 41:41
  something fairly mundane that we have allowed ourselves to get
• 41:46
  really upset about. And if you find yourself
• 41:49
  involved, you are involved at the point where it has become an
• 41:54
  issue. When it may not actually be an
• 41:57
  issue. It's just that our emotions have
• 42:00
  gotten pretty heated and it's hard.
• 42:03
  Step away and reassess, what's going on?
• 42:07
  So I don't know. I try to aim for even Keel and
• 42:11
  chill at most points. Can I tell you what?
• 42:13
  I saw yesterday? Go for it.
• 42:15
  This is also going to explain a bit of my trauma because I don't
• 42:20
  like to get involved. I had to get my car registered.
• 42:23
  We do it every year. It sucks because it's expensive
• 42:28
  at least with my old car. It was so expensive.
• 42:32
  So I brought Phones. I had a podcast.
• 42:35
  I was listening to I think it was my brother, my brother and
• 42:38
  me. So a comedy podcast I'm having a
• 42:40
  good time. And then I hear voices raised
• 42:47
  think as people are yelling at each other and I look over and I
• 42:50
  see one of the managers yelling at a customer and the customers
• 42:55
  like I was here last year and it was the same thing that time in
• 42:59
  Moldova. And and this employee is like,
• 43:03
  You were just yelling at my regional manager about this.
• 43:07
  And what is my regional manager going to do?
• 43:09
  They're going to kick you out until you to go somewhere else.
• 43:12
  Like you're not going to get your problem solved by acting
• 43:15
  this way. And I'm just like you're right.
• 43:19
  But I don't want to listen to this.
• 43:22
  So I had to turn my podcast up and do the best I could to not
• 43:26
  only not be involved but not watch and you know it's just we
• 43:30
  train ourselves to react to these things.
• 43:33
  Different ways and my training says, don't get involved.
• 43:38
  Keep your head down and let things happen.
• 43:43
  I know. It's you mean, yeah.
• 43:45
  My I'm even one of the other. I'm even, like, risk-averse,
• 43:49
  like yourself and just like all please let me get out of here or
• 43:52
  if it's interesting. Sometimes I might kind of just
• 43:57
  casually. Unhook a headphone casually.
• 44:02
  Look around the think. What's interesting for me is
• 44:07
  intoxicants like if I'm at the bar, the Sami on this podcast
• 44:13
  doesn't exist. If I'm at a bar and I can hear
• 44:18
  you talking. Chances are, I want to be
• 44:20
  involved in the conversation because alcohol has said,
• 44:23
  everyone wants to talk to me and alcohol has lied.
• 44:28
  But that's what it's Ed, so I have gotten into conflicts in
• 44:33
  bars, never physical altercations.
• 44:35
  I've been in one fight in my life and I lost and, you know,
• 44:40
  despite being a pretty large, dude, I just don't like hurting
• 44:44
  others really don't like doing that.
• 44:47
  So, I'd rather lose a fight, then then hurt someone.
• 44:53
  So in a bar situation I'll just let my mouth just go.
• 44:58
  Go go. And maybe my mouth ends up
• 45:02
  hurting people, but I didn't realize it at the time because I
• 45:07
  was a little bit too drunk. I mean the intoxicant I prefer
• 45:13
  is, is greens and it's because it allows me to maintain
• 45:17
  kindness. Like what is that?
• 45:19
  If I'm drunk, I'm weed. Oh, sorry.
• 45:25
  I thought, I don't know. I was I was using slang.
• 45:30
  I apologize as a good evening, I prefer kindness.
• 45:37
  And I have found of the intoxicants that I usually do.
• 45:41
  Weed is the one that allows me to maintain kindness, but also
• 45:44
  allows me to step outside of my comfort zone and have
• 45:47
  conversations with strangers without feeling like what are
• 45:50
  they thinking about? What are they going to do?
• 45:52
  What are they going to say later?
• 45:54
  Because none of that matters. You know I will never Or hear
• 45:59
  what they say later, I will never know what they are
• 46:03
  thinking about me. I can come back and listen to
• 46:07
  this podcast and hear what was said again, but I don't know
• 46:11
  what's in your brain and I definitely don't know what's in
• 46:14
  the brain of someone listening right now.
• 46:16
  You know, he and it doesn't matter.
• 46:19
  What matters is that I represented myself in any
• 46:23
  situation in a way that I still feel like I was honest and
• 46:26
  truthful to me, you know? Always inspect.
• 46:33
  It's interesting. You say that I was looking right
• 46:35
  at the other day and I was just looking at various Fred's and
• 46:38
  someone asked in the ass credit thing like what stuff you know
• 46:44
  that you what stuff matters, less as you get older and one of
• 46:49
  the things, one of the things was that one of the people said,
• 46:53
  it was one of the top voted answers was just not caring
• 46:56
  about what people think and this is so So true like you just when
• 47:01
  you stop caring about what people think and what they think
• 47:04
  of you, what they're thinking in the moment, it's like a
• 47:06
  liberating feeling. Where you?
• 47:09
  You just realized that to what I realized two things.
• 47:13
  One people are not thinking about you as much as you think,
• 47:17
  they're thinking about you. Yeah, and that's one part of it
• 47:35
  but another part of it is like even if they are thinking about
• 47:38
  you for better or worse. It's like why does it matter?
• 47:40
  It doesn't change what you're going to do, it doesn't change
• 47:43
  what you have done, it doesn't change anything like the only.
• 47:47
  The only time that something that someone is thinking matters
• 47:54
  directly to you. I suppose as when you're in like
• 47:56
  a situation like a job interview talent shows I'm going to that.
• 48:00
  Maybe then it matters but then you're not going to know unless
• 48:03
  they say it. So there's no point in worrying
• 48:05
  about what they're thinking. Like if you know what they say
• 48:08
  May, Be everything. It may not be everything.
• 48:12
  They were thinking it may not be even honestly what they were
• 48:16
  thinking. My my my marriage.
• 48:21
  I'm divorced. Sorry.
• 48:24
  Oh, it's fine. I'm so happy.
• 48:28
  So yeah, it sucks to be single and it sucks to be lonely, but
• 48:34
  so much better than being with that particular person.
• 48:37
  Like, but one of the conflicts we had was, you know, she was
• 48:42
  always like you. It's like you don't even care
• 48:45
  about what I'm thinking about. And I regularly had to say, I'm
• 48:49
  not psychic and time away from her, specifically has taught me
• 48:54
  that while I may not be psychic, perhaps what she needed was for
• 49:00
  me to be a bit more empathetic. And and that's a thing that I
• 49:04
  think that we can strive for is trying to recognize other
• 49:08
  people's The Ewings and maybe getting to the Crux of why they
• 49:14
  are feeling any particular way. But I don't care what someone is
• 49:20
  thinking still. I only want to care about what
• 49:25
  their feel, their thoughts may be impacting their feelings or
• 49:31
  vice versa, but I will never know what their thoughts are,
• 49:34
  but if they've got a scowl on their face or if they're very
• 49:38
  tender, Hence, in their body, I have hints as to what their
• 49:43
  field and I can take those hints and, you know, change the way I
• 49:50
  am going to approach the situation based on those hands.
• 49:53
  I think empathy is a far more approachable and attainable
• 49:58
  skill than becoming a psychic if that makes sense.
• 50:04
  Yeah, you're right. I've had quite a few people in
• 50:06
  the show discuss this Concept of empathy and you know, something
• 50:11
  that I'm learning about every single day and, you know, we all
• 50:13
  make mistakes, but I totally agree.
• 50:17
  I think more often than not, that's what people are looking
• 50:21
  for. You know, like I had a bit of a
• 50:23
  mini debate with one of my housemates, the other day about
• 50:25
  this. And I kind of said that like,
• 50:27
  more fun than not, like when people want support, they don't
• 50:32
  want advice, they don't want your sympathy, they one to feel
• 50:37
  that you care. And that, you understand.
• 50:41
  And that your present that's kind of like the three points of
• 50:44
  empathy as like you know, you're there you care your present.
• 50:49
  But yeah, aside from that I mean, No, you don't have to know
• 50:54
  what they're thinking. You don't even have the answer.
• 50:56
  You just have to be, you know. Yeah.
• 50:59
  And that just blew my mind when someone told me that like, I
• 51:03
  actually learned this most recent lesson From from a bit of
• 51:09
  an argument that out with someone and unfortunately,
• 51:12
  didn't patch things up, but they were the way they were.
• 51:16
  But I did learn a valuable lesson from them and they,
• 51:18
  because they turn around to me and they said, Christian, I
• 51:20
  don't want you to say this or that I just want you to how does
• 51:28
  she put up? It's trying to find the words.
• 51:35
  It was a particular way. She put it that I think was kind
• 51:38
  of perfect. Paraphrasing a little bit, but
• 51:44
  it's like to recognize how she was feeling too.
• 51:51
  Well, is the physical is so frustrating?
• 51:54
  Well, it's knowledge, acknowledge she wanted me to
• 51:58
  acknowledge how she felt. It's like to say things.
• 52:03
  Like, I understand how you feel, or yeah, I'm sorry that you're
• 52:07
  feeling this way. Like because, as you said,
• 52:08
  feelings are more important than the thoughts, the thoughts of,
• 52:11
  you know, like The advice stuff like are I mean, most of the
• 52:15
  time people don't take people's advice anyway but the the
• 52:19
  feeding stuff is so you can change someone's feeling just by
• 52:24
  paying attention. And being present, may be saying
• 52:28
  a few positive things or shifting their mindset with
• 52:32
  something else. Or even just take distracting
• 52:34
  them, you know, like bringing it back to you and what you do
• 52:37
  like, when you when people come and look at your tick-tocks,
• 52:40
  your lives, you know, there. Coming for entertainment,
• 52:43
  they're coming for a laugh, they're coming for for joy and
• 52:46
  and that is a form of escapism and it can lift them back up.
• 52:51
  If they are in a low Pace, you've now put them up to a
• 52:54
  happy place again and now they can be all the best of
• 52:59
  themselves you know. And it's so it's a valuable
• 53:03
  thing to be able to gift to the world and to bring people up
• 53:08
  again. And you know, I think I agree
• 53:10
  empathy is the same, you know it's It's not easy.
• 53:15
  I'm always learning myself, and I don't think I'm great.
• 53:18
  I think sometimes I can be really good.
• 53:20
  Sometimes, I'm just terrible at it.
• 53:23
  Yeah. But its weak human, aren't we?
• 53:26
  We, you know, and we just have to try and keep getting better.
• 53:30
  Yeah. You know.
• 53:31
  It's I'll say it, like this. Thoughts are electrical.
• 53:37
  They happen quickly, and they can go away quickly.
• 53:41
  But feelings tend to be chemical and they stick around in your
• 53:45
  body. They process throughout your
• 53:48
  whole system. If you're constantly trying to
• 53:51
  read someone's thoughts, they move too quickly, they just get
• 53:56
  processed too fast. You'll never do it, you just
• 54:00
  won't do it. Even if you think you're a
• 54:01
  psychic. Thoughts happened too quickly
• 54:04
  for you to keep up with all of them.
• 54:06
  But chemicals, stick around and our body processes, our feelings
• 54:12
  holistically. And so you can get those hands,
• 54:15
  you can get those Clues as to where someone is at.
• 54:20
  I can't tell people what those Clues are because with different
• 54:23
  people, it's different, you know, people see me a sweaty fat
• 54:28
  tall guy and they're like, oh man, I bet he's this way.
• 54:32
  No, I'm just anxious. Jesus, that's where the sweat is
• 54:34
  coming from and probably where the fat is coming from.
• 54:37
  Like, you're a good-looking. Yeah, well, I appreciate it.
• 54:43
  So right, you know, I guess what I'm saying is like I think that
• 54:51
  empathy allows people to feel scene where they are right now
• 54:56
  and right now is all we ever have guaranteed.
• 55:01
  You know, we can never go back. Can look with perfect clarity at
• 55:05
  the past but we can never go back there.
• 55:08
  And when we look forward, there's a fog, there's no Trail
• 55:13
  before us. There's no signs to indicate
• 55:16
  which way to go, but right now we have total and complete
• 55:22
  presence. And so if you can start picking
• 55:24
  up on people's feelings, you will join them in the present.
• 55:31
  You will be living right now. Now with them I guess the goal
• 55:35
  is we all want to be Qui-Gon Jinn that's really what it boils
• 55:38
  down to. We all want to be a great Jedi
• 55:40
  Master which brings me onto the way you look.
• 55:46
  A you can't really try to cosplay as Qui-Gon Jinn.
• 55:50
  Oh, that's funny. I got to look at it but I might
• 55:53
  have to trim my beard to know, not so bad.
• 55:56
  Does he have a long beard in episode 1?
• 56:00
  It's been a while since I've watched it for Me episode.
• 56:03
  One is my popcorn flick of the entire Star Wars franchise.
• 56:07
  I don't hate it. I know a lot of people my age
• 56:11
  and older hate the prequels. I only hate episodes 2 & 9
• 56:19
  attack of the Clones, and Rise of Skywalker.
• 56:23
  Those are the only ones that I think are just bad movies and
• 56:27
  it's hard to just watch them. Hmm.
• 56:29
  What episode 1, you put in some popcorn, it It's got Bright
• 56:33
  Lights. It's loud.
• 56:35
  It's got comedy. It's got action.
• 56:38
  I mean, they showed us what a lightsaber fight, could be for
• 56:41
  the first time in episode 1. We say, instead of two old
• 56:45
  dudes, just still poking stick things, which I just don't get
• 56:49
  it. Oh yeah, oh yeah.
• 57:03
  Like master of evil that and calling him by his title as a
• 57:11
  first name like, oh man, there was so many things.
• 57:13
  Star Wars, didn't know, but they were taking a risk with episode
• 57:19
  one. And, and while it's not a
• 57:21
  perfect movie, I still think about some of the things that
• 57:25
  Qui-Gon Jinn said throughout the movie like a mindful of the
• 57:30
  present, you know, as always a bigger.
• 57:33
  A fish. Yes.
• 57:35
  So many little, quips and lines. I had a couple of weeks but do
• 57:43
  not let them all that stuff. A lot of people would point to
• 57:47
  Taoism the down, meaning way or path, or something like that.
• 57:54
  And they would say taoism is a strong influence on the original
• 57:59
  idea of the Jedi. And while the Jedi have you
• 58:03
  Changed as art changes, I can't help but look at them and think
• 58:08
  those are some Taoist Warriors. Those are people who hide their
• 58:12
  weapons under their robes. And they come into a situation
• 58:17
  with words and most of their abilities, especially combat,
• 58:23
  based abilities are to push things away.
• 58:25
  And to, you know, try to stop physical conflict.
• 58:29
  And then they finally pull out their Over and what do they use
• 58:34
  it for it to reflect Blaster bolts?
• 58:36
  They're not even usually using it to attack.
• 58:40
  They're using it for defense and I'm just like yeah I can see how
• 58:44
  you could point to these some of these characters and be like
• 58:47
  that's a Taoist Warrior. I got a great one.
• 58:50
  I gotta ask. There's this guy, that's done a
• 58:53
  few videos on YouTube is while ago now and he's videos,
• 58:57
  essentially are like why the empire was right?
• 59:01
  And why the Jed the wide Empire actually the good guys, right?
• 59:05
  And the whole videos, they are a piss-take, but at the same time,
• 59:11
  there is a lot of Truth in them as well.
• 59:13
  And one of the things is that he kind of says that the Jedi are
• 59:16
  massive Hypocrites. Yeah and they're very kind of
• 59:21
  what's the word like you know when you try and kind of impose
• 59:26
  your Good Will on others but my by extension you are being
• 59:30
  hypocritical but also kind of being a bit elitist.
• 59:33
  There's a lot of grief and then turn it into dogma.
• 59:37
  And that's the issue with with the Jedi is that it has become
• 59:41
  Dogma. Like, I tell people, I mean, my
• 59:45
  religion is that I'm an atheist with a spiritual leaning towards
• 59:48
  taoism and I think that that is the way you're supposed to
• 59:53
  approach taoism is that it's kind of your philosophy on the
• 59:57
  side. It is not your belief system.
• 1:00:00
  But there are people who saw it working and codified it and
• 1:00:06
  turned it into dogma. And so, now you've got a
• 1:00:09
  religion called taoism and I think that that is reflected in
• 1:00:13
  Star Wars where Qui-Gon is told by Obi-Wan, you would be on the
• 1:00:17
  council if you just did blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 1:00:19
  And he's like that's, that's not the way that's, I am following
• 1:00:24
  the force. I am, I am connected with the
• 1:00:27
  force and now, you know, through Clone wars and all these other
• 1:00:32
  things we learned that Qui gonn didn't die.
• 1:00:35
  He became one with the force in his afterlife and was able to
• 1:00:41
  continue to communicate and blah blah blah so he was living proof
• 1:00:46
  that Dogma doesn't work and it had the Jedi Order, made him a
• 1:00:52
  council member. They would have had that voice
• 1:00:56
  that says now this Dogma isn't working, we need to go back.
• 1:01:00
  Back to meditating and to being flexible and to being aware of
• 1:01:04
  the present and not trying to predict the future.
• 1:01:08
  We need to go back to the way it was and stopped kidnapping
• 1:01:12
  children because children connect with the force easier
• 1:01:16
  instead, we should open ourselves up to the idea that
• 1:01:20
  you could find a kid in the desert and that kid in the
• 1:01:22
  desert should be a Jedi, but we just need to support that kid in
• 1:01:27
  the desert. So I don't know.
• 1:01:29
  I like I love Qui-Gon Jinn. I think he is such a great Jedi
• 1:01:34
  Master. He is such a good analogy of
• 1:01:37
  what was wrong with the Jedi at that period of Galactic history.
• 1:01:42
  And the reason why it is so easy for the Empire to defeat them
• 1:01:47
  because they essentially just get rid of Dogma.
• 1:01:49
  They're like you know what everything the Jedi said gone
• 1:01:53
  it's out. And look, we've got peace and
• 1:01:55
  stability. Granted you have to deal with
• 1:01:57
  soldiers everywhere but you've got peace.
• 1:02:00
  Stability, in an open economy. Like, you know, it's one of
• 1:02:03
  those things where had they listened to one guy, one guy,
• 1:02:07
  everything would be different. There's yeah, there's so many
• 1:02:11
  what ifs in that series that just really entertain me.
• 1:02:15
  Like, I don't try to think of a really good one like, oh yeah.
• 1:02:19
  Like what if they just left Anakin on?
• 1:02:23
  Tatooine just fuck it, just, you know, who cares?
• 1:02:25
  She's just young son. Some boy who's very astute.
• 1:02:30
  Screw it. You know you know what?
• 1:02:33
  I bet I think his path still leads him to becoming Darth
• 1:02:40
  Vader. Reason for this.
• 1:02:44
  But how if he never gets out, Tatooine, as we have seen with
• 1:02:51
  this expanded universe, Tatooine, is Aquarius.
• 1:02:56
  This is where it's happening. Apparently.
• 1:02:59
  Everything that's essentially like, you know, if you go to
• 1:03:05
  Columbia where you're not anywhere near Brazil, but things
• 1:03:10
  are popping off in Colombia all the time and you might think
• 1:03:15
  we'll we didn't even come in. Anywhere close to where things
• 1:03:18
  are supposed to be happening. Sorry, man.
• 1:03:21
  That's just where the highlights are.
• 1:03:23
  I think because you've got the gang activity.
• 1:03:27
  You've got so many different cultures, using Tatooine as a
• 1:03:33
  port, either to ship goods and services or to move through the
• 1:03:39
  systems. It's just such a centralized
• 1:03:43
  location that eventually Anakin Frustrated with being a slave,
• 1:03:48
  even when his mother is sold and in this universe he would be
• 1:03:56
  sold with her, but he doesn't take that as Freedom.
• 1:03:59
  He takes that as, you know, being a slave some more.
• 1:04:03
  I think he joins, one of the gangs and eventually gets the
• 1:04:08
  eye of the emperor and becomes Vader without a Qui-Gon, Jinn
• 1:04:13
  and Obi-Wan influencing how He thinks of things and in that
• 1:04:18
  situation, when we get to return the Jedi, we would have an
• 1:04:22
  Anakin with no interest of returning to the light side of
• 1:04:26
  the force. We have an Anakin who has
• 1:04:30
  completely disassociated from other people.
• 1:04:35
  And so even if Luke is not a Skywalker, when you get to that
• 1:04:40
  New, Hope Jedi coming down to finally, face the emperor.
• 1:04:46
  There's no He's in for Darth Vader to break away and rescue
• 1:04:51
  the new Jedi. So that's where I go.
• 1:04:54
  I think he's still turns into Darth Vader, but he's worse.
• 1:04:58
  I think if that would happen, there's no way that Luke would
• 1:05:01
  be him at all serious. You just be end of it and I
• 1:05:06
  don't know. I kind of like when the bad guys
• 1:05:07
  went We play that there's a there was a computer game in, I
• 1:05:17
  think like 2002-2003 always around the time that Revenge
• 1:05:21
  others because I love a person, I love revenge of the Super
• 1:05:23
  Force. Brilliant, I do too.
• 1:05:25
  That's my favorite of the new Trilogy.
• 1:05:27
  Yes, Excellency. And there was a video game that
• 1:05:30
  came out which was amazing. It was episode 3 and you got to
• 1:05:35
  do all of the lightsaber battles plus like in sort of stuff in
• 1:05:40
  between. I was brilliant and rad, right?
• 1:05:43
  And when you spoiler, I mean it's been 20 years.
• 1:05:46
  But if you, if you're Anakin and you can like it successfully
• 1:05:52
  kill ob1, it shows you like a clip of like how that would look
• 1:05:58
  and then like he successfully, does the jump gets The High
• 1:06:02
  Ground kills 0, b 1. And then the emperor comes to
• 1:06:06
  him and he kills the emperor and then yeah like it's my Iron is
• 1:06:11
  very realistic and is it's very cool to see.
• 1:06:16
  I mean in that situation Anakin has his whole body.
• 1:06:20
  One of the things that I often think about is that Darth Vader
• 1:06:25
  is a limited Sith. Like even if he were to kill the
• 1:06:29
  emperor and move on his half robotic, body keeps him away
• 1:06:35
  from certain force abilities. This is one thing I've really
• 1:06:39
  liked as well. The in the movies and especially
• 1:06:44
  the new ones they've been very cuz in the computer games, you
• 1:06:49
  know, you've got Darth Vader, like jumping doings forced jumps
• 1:06:52
  and all that shit. Like that's just not realistic.
• 1:06:54
  Like as you said, he is a limited Jedi.
• 1:06:56
  He's robotic like he and and it doesn't matter, like Rogue one
• 1:07:01
  Kenobi, he's always grounded. He has a power that he uses, but
• 1:07:07
  he still grounded and he still robotic and you You know, it's
• 1:07:11
  very much like that and it's it's consistent with when you
• 1:07:16
  get to the original trilogy, you know, he's it's all consistent
• 1:07:19
  like he would be limited in his abilities and it's also
• 1:07:24
  interesting as well. Like there's a lot of people
• 1:07:28
  doing his bidding which is interesting and I feel that
• 1:07:32
  there's a lot of it is to do with that because he's limited.
• 1:07:35
  I mean, in spoilers for anyone who hasn't seen Kenobi.
• 1:07:39
  Okay. Be right.
• 1:07:43
  Yeah. So obviously Darth Vader spends.
• 1:07:48
  Most of what Anakin spends most of his time in the back to tank
• 1:07:51
  and I can't help but feel that that's by Design in order to
• 1:07:54
  kind of illustrate, just how broken he is.
• 1:07:57
  And how as Darth Vader, he might seem like this presses menacing
• 1:08:05
  terrifying character. That's all powerful, but
• 1:08:07
  actually does. The fader is not actually that
• 1:08:10
  powerful like he is powerful to you know like any untrained
• 1:08:17
  Jedi's or whatever. And for the most part he can
• 1:08:19
  defeat a lot of the but like the major Jedi that the really
• 1:08:21
  powerful ones like, you know, be one or whoever like yeah they
• 1:08:26
  they can't he can't defeat them. I mean even ob1.
• 1:08:29
  He didn't defeat him. Obi-Wan did exactly what Qui-Gon
• 1:08:32
  did. He became one with the force and
• 1:08:34
  made himself forced disappear or whatever.
• 1:08:38
  And Luke was able to defeat him because he was flawed because
• 1:08:41
  there was still light in him and everything but also because he
• 1:08:43
  was broken and old by that. But it would been like 30 years
• 1:08:48
  of being in that or 20 years or however long being in that, you
• 1:08:51
  know, that soon. Yeah.
• 1:08:54
  And it's it's got to be tire it. Like, I've, I know the books
• 1:08:58
  aren't really considered Canon anymore, but screw it.
• 1:09:01
  Like when they describe what it's like being in the In the
• 1:09:07
  suit, apparently, it's like torturous for him, tiring.
• 1:09:11
  He doesn't. He's constantly in fear anxiety,
• 1:09:14
  angry. You know, it's like just tiring
• 1:09:17
  and I don't know if, if this is still one of his abilities, but
• 1:09:23
  way back in the day, he was credited with having battle
• 1:09:27
  meditation, which is a force ability that both Jedi and Sith
• 1:09:31
  can use where he essentially projects his feelings. outwards
• 1:09:37
  and I think I am a whiny brat that hates anybody and everyone
• 1:09:45
  fights and it's when you watch Rogue one which is one of my
• 1:09:53
  favorites of them all, you see a hallway, full of terrified
• 1:09:59
  Rebel, Troopers desperately trying to escape and that is
• 1:10:05
  proof that he's Pushing fear outwards and then one movie
• 1:10:09
  later granted. We are, we're going back. 30
• 1:10:13
  years to a time when technology wasn't there.
• 1:10:15
  But if you're like me, and you like to rationalize things in
• 1:10:19
  your head, when mature Obi-Wan Kenobi is facing off with Darth
• 1:10:24
  Vader. He does not feel that fear.
• 1:10:27
  So, Darth Vader cannot come in and just swing his lightsaber
• 1:10:32
  and whale away because he does not.
• 1:10:36
  Have that Force ability to intimidate and scare the person
• 1:10:41
  who he is facing. And so instead we see two old
• 1:10:46
  men, trying to still hold their lightsabers fighting each other.
• 1:10:52
  I'll add to this. I think he's afraid of Obi-Wan.
• 1:10:57
  I'll agree with that stays to he's tentative.
• 1:10:59
  So that's why he doesn't fully go for it, because he's unsure,
• 1:11:02
  and what, we're now discovering with the law, that's now being
• 1:11:05
  added is that That he lost his, he lost the the major battle in
• 1:11:13
  Revenge of the Sith, you know, he got chopped up into pieces
• 1:11:16
  and if you really think about it yet.
• 1:11:18
  Yeah. He becomes as if he goes under
• 1:11:20
  the emperor's wing and everything and he becomes full
• 1:11:22
  on dark side, but he's like, Obi-Wan took everything from
• 1:11:26
  him. He made him less of what he was.
• 1:11:28
  So you're, of course, going to be scared about the person who
• 1:11:31
  did that to you. What if they do it to you again?
• 1:11:33
  You know, it's just like a rational thinking thing and in
• 1:11:35
  Kenobi. Again, spoilers, this is what
• 1:11:40
  episode 2. You should know that thing is so
• 1:11:43
  33. Yeah, so in episode 3, you see,
• 1:11:47
  I mean, just looking, I don't even know what to call it like a
• 1:11:50
  little scuffle. Let's go to scuffle and I loved
• 1:11:53
  it. Very poetic, they'll fade it
• 1:11:55
  does exactly what we did to him. But like I'm a very kind of
• 1:11:58
  pissy emo way where it's not quite the same thing, but it was
• 1:12:02
  cool is really cool, not not disparaging about It means bet
• 1:12:07
  that when you see it that clearly, like, he's trying to
• 1:12:09
  recreate the same thing with doesn't work, but it illustrates
• 1:12:15
  the point that Obi-Wan is, not quite where he was, you know,
• 1:12:19
  he's been a top ranks in training and Darth Vader makes
• 1:12:23
  reference to that. He says that, but at the same
• 1:12:25
  time, he still tend to get. I think that's one of the
• 1:12:29
  reasons why he doesn't move on everyone because you did.
• 1:12:32
  That was really interesting where he was there in the fire.
• 1:12:34
  Was there is that he could have very easily gotten around, And
• 1:12:36
  just killed everyone. Why doesn't he?
• 1:12:38
  Yeah, because I think he's nervous, he's not 100% sure.
• 1:12:41
  He, you know, maybe it's a trap it's been 12 years since they
• 1:12:46
  have seen each other. Like, is this Obi-Wan who has
• 1:12:51
  continued training and is very powerful and can win this fight?
• 1:12:56
  Is he feigning, is he pretending to be weak and scared and
• 1:13:01
  losing? You know, I don't know the thing
• 1:13:04
  to this as well, which I just thought Maybe there's a
• 1:13:08
  hesitancy for him to kill everyone because his hatred for
• 1:13:12
  Obi. One is like the single thing
• 1:13:15
  keeping him going. Yeah.
• 1:13:17
  It could be his link to the dark side.
• 1:13:19
  It's like it's like what our not just that but if Obi-Wan dies,
• 1:13:23
  what does he have to live for? Yeah, who ain't there to?
• 1:13:26
  Hey yeah yeah I mean I suppose that because that's his whole
• 1:13:30
  existence and everything that you see him throughout
• 1:13:35
  everything that Games the books. Everything it all talks about
• 1:13:38
  his hatred for everyone and everything and it's it's very
• 1:13:43
  interesting to see. I think they're doing a really
• 1:13:46
  good job with this. I was really Amazed by the bit
• 1:13:51
  where you see Anakin in the robe.
• 1:13:52
  I hope they do more of that stuff.
• 1:13:54
  That's, that's really cool. There's a, there's a thing on
• 1:13:58
  YouTube. I am going to get it all wrong.
• 1:14:01
  It might be seen, 38, or something like that.
• 1:14:04
  It's a short video, but Essentially some visual effect
• 1:14:09
  artists wanted to reshoot the ob 1 vs.
• 1:14:15
  Darth Vader, fight from A New Hope.
• 1:14:18
  Oh, I've seen it. Yeah, it's so dope and it just
• 1:14:22
  makes me think, like, maybe we're ready to have the original
• 1:14:28
  trilogy remade. I thought about this, You've got
• 1:14:37
  younger act. I mean you got the guy that
• 1:14:38
  played solo, you could, we cast Sebastian Stan, could do Luke
• 1:14:45
  Skywalker. I mean there's options Manny.
• 1:14:49
  I mean he's getting a bit older now and I want to see a Luke who
• 1:14:53
  looks like he's 17. Maybe Timothy shallow.
• 1:14:55
  May he looks like a child. I just think, I think it would
• 1:15:00
  be brilliant. It'd be different, but I also
• 1:15:03
  think that there would be a massive backlash and that's why
• 1:15:05
  they haven't done it. And I think that's kind of silly
• 1:15:09
  because things change and the original movies were made at a
• 1:15:13
  time. As you said, like they're still
• 1:15:15
  amazing that I think. I mean they still you practical
• 1:15:17
  effects to this day. They still use more which is I
• 1:15:20
  think that's brilliant but reboots have to happen every
• 1:15:25
  once in a while so you can introduce things to a new
• 1:15:27
  generation. And there's only so much agree
• 1:15:29
  with that. Once you've done the Kenobi
• 1:15:31
  stuff in, you know, there's only so many stories you can do that.
• 1:15:34
  Actually include like Darth Vader, which is such a powerful
• 1:15:37
  Interesting villain. But then there's a lot of
• 1:15:39
  arguments that people have which I agree to where they say, well,
• 1:15:42
  we're kind of done with the Anakin Skywalker story.
• 1:15:45
  It's been done and it's like that's fair enough and it is I
• 1:15:49
  think there's talks about there being an Old Republic movie and
• 1:15:52
  stuff and so there's there's a lot of cool stuff they could do.
• 1:15:55
  But yeah I mean I'd be open to that.
• 1:15:58
  I think that would be interesting to see and there's a
• 1:16:03
  lot they could do with it and there's all these actors that
• 1:16:05
  could do it. And it's They could do it
• 1:16:07
  differently. They could change things.
• 1:16:10
  Oh yeah, that's another thing. You know, they could, they could
• 1:16:13
  change it in a way that actually cares about continuity, right?
• 1:16:18
  As much as I love Star Wars, I mean, just like, I'm gonna, I'm
• 1:16:24
  always going to come back to taoism, but just like taoism,
• 1:16:27
  you just have to be flexible with it because there is no
• 1:16:30
  continuity. There is very little consistency
• 1:16:34
  and even within the first trilogy By the time you get to
• 1:16:38
  the third movie, Luke is like you told me that Darth Vader
• 1:16:42
  killed my father. Well, you think he kind of did
• 1:16:46
  it in a certain point of view? I will see you with with with
• 1:16:50
  that though. They, they salvaged that quite
• 1:16:52
  well because yeah, well, it was a bizarre thing for everyone to
• 1:16:56
  say it's kind of true. Like his father was in a certain
• 1:17:00
  point of view of all of Star Wars that the biggest part the
• 1:17:04
  best probably, the biggest pumpkin the Channel series as
• 1:17:07
  tooth problems iPhone while 31 honcho.
• 1:17:11
  At first, I don't care what you say Han shot first.
• 1:17:14
  He's a, he's a ruthless killer and it's cool.
• 1:17:17
  So, yeah, I'm Han shot first sad.
• 1:17:19
  What makes has changed? So great by the end of the
• 1:17:22
  movies, because now, he cares about these little teddy bears.
• 1:17:26
  Like, this was the dude who shot first.
• 1:17:28
  This was the religious, dude. I used to be a cold-blooded
• 1:17:35
  killer. Cuddling cuddles know like yeah
• 1:17:42
  your other two things. Sorry.
• 1:17:44
  So so that Leia kisses her brother and then we find out
• 1:17:48
  later that she knows she's always known that that's her
• 1:17:52
  brother. Okay.
• 1:17:53
  So right and then apparently she knew had her mother for ya.
• 1:18:01
  I have a mother even though. Yeah, so Consistency and
• 1:18:08
  continuity have never been front of mind when making a star war,
• 1:18:15
  but that's its charm. You know, it's you're getting a
• 1:18:20
  story that is its own story and it's going to contradict with
• 1:18:25
  other stories and you know, it's no Barbra like, I dig Marvel
• 1:18:30
  because continuity seems to be a big deal in the MCU but Disney
• 1:18:37
  has not applied that formula to Star Wars and maybe they will in
• 1:18:41
  the future. And if they do, I might enjoy it
• 1:18:43
  in a in that way. But for now, I just kind of have
• 1:18:48
  to forget about everything I saw in the past.
• 1:18:52
  And be like, oh yeah, Darth Vader.
• 1:18:53
  He's a character that exists now.
• 1:18:56
  Let's see what he does in this story, you know, because it may
• 1:19:00
  be completely contradictory to what I have seen in previous
• 1:19:03
  stories. And frankly, the thing that got
• 1:19:06
  me, There was the animated series The Clone Wars.
• 1:19:11
  There was a two-part episode where at the end of part 1, the
• 1:19:20
  Republic Wentz but then at the beginning of part 2 they're
• 1:19:24
  talking about how the Republic lost and it's the same story but
• 1:19:30
  they had to end every episode with a happy ending because it's
• 1:19:33
  a cartoon for Cartoon Network and you got to you know, these
• 1:19:36
  kids Handled bad guys winning. So we'll just change the story
• 1:19:39
  in the next episode to say bad guys one.
• 1:19:43
  So how are the good guys going to win this time?
• 1:19:45
  And I rationalize that in my head by saying what if these are
• 1:19:48
  stories from various clone troopers and this is just how
• 1:19:53
  they are. Remembering it and their
• 1:19:55
  memories are going to be contradictory and frankly
• 1:19:57
  they're going to be wrong but this is what they remember and
• 1:20:02
  someone is telling us their version of that story and Then
• 1:20:07
  we'll hear the next version of someone else's story and it
• 1:20:10
  might contradict, but we weren't there.
• 1:20:12
  We're just getting stories from other people who work, you know,
• 1:20:16
  you want. Yeah, I didn't see those turbo
• 1:20:19
  lasers firing down on us. I just want to switch things up
• 1:20:24
  and you spoke about how important taoism is to you.
• 1:20:28
  Let's explore that a little bit. So how did you get into it and
• 1:20:32
  why does it mean so much to you? So about 15 years ago, I was I
• 1:20:41
  was a hardcore Baptist and I thought I wanted to be a youth
• 1:20:44
  Minister. I knew I wanted Ministry to be a
• 1:20:49
  part of my life. I went to a private college and
• 1:20:54
  I realized I was not getting any support from home like ministers
• 1:21:00
  or friends, anyone who I was just wanting to get advice from
• 1:21:06
  or just chat with the fact that I was now out of state seem to
• 1:21:12
  communicate to them. That I was no longer a part of
• 1:21:15
  their lives. And I so instead I started
• 1:21:19
  listening to people who were around me and you know, even
• 1:21:23
  going to a Christian School, you will hear people challenge
• 1:21:26
  Christianity and and I started to think maybe I shouldn't have
• 1:21:32
  this. All view of what Christianity
• 1:21:36
  means. So I started to move more into
• 1:21:42
  agnosticism where I was like, I just don't know the answer.
• 1:21:45
  I'm pretty sure it's this way, but I don't know.
• 1:21:49
  And someone was like, oh, you're agnostic, you would love the Dao
• 1:21:54
  de Jing and they gave me this copy.
• 1:21:57
  It's the Stephen Mitchell version that I've had for like
• 1:22:00
  15 years. It's all boy.
• 1:22:04
  Gross and Grody on the pages because I'm always opening it
• 1:22:07
  and reading it and there was this line where they said the
• 1:22:13
  wise man the wise man, here's the Dow and accepts it
• 1:22:18
  immediately. The average man.
• 1:22:19
  Here's the dowel and thinks about it, but allows it to pass
• 1:22:24
  over his head and the fool here is the Dow and laughs out loud.
• 1:22:29
  And for a while I was like, well, I need to be the wise man.
• 1:22:31
  I need to be the one who accepts it.
• 1:22:34
  But 15 years of study has shown me that the one we need to be
• 1:22:39
  following is the fool. The person who doesn't know
• 1:22:42
  anything, the person who doesn't perceive anything.
• 1:22:45
  And here's these lessons and goes, haha, that's kind of true.
• 1:22:48
  I like that. That is the hero of taoism is
• 1:22:52
  the person who is removed themselves.
• 1:22:55
  So, I got into it because I was at a spiritual crisis.
• 1:23:01
  And as I have told many people, Many times, it is not a
• 1:23:05
  religion, it's barely spiritualism.
• 1:23:08
  Like, it is trying to grow your spirit as it were, but there's
• 1:23:13
  nothing in there. That tells you what's going to
• 1:23:15
  happen when you die, there's nothing that tells you how to
• 1:23:17
  save your soul. There's barely reference to you
• 1:23:22
  having a soul. It's more of an issue of saying.
• 1:23:26
  Let's imagine that. Whatever force is in the
• 1:23:30
  universe is bigger than we imagined it to be.
• 1:23:34
  And I was my entry point. I was like well I believe in a
• 1:23:36
  pretty big God so what if the god I believed in was even
• 1:23:43
  bigger than that and that was kind of my entryway into saying
• 1:23:49
  this Dogma limits. My view of God therefore I don't
• 1:23:55
  accept this Dogma anymore because it's no longer serving
• 1:24:00
  and a truly infinite version of God.
• 1:24:04
  Does that make sense? So so just you know little bits
• 1:24:07
  by little bits eventually, I stopped believing in the concept
• 1:24:12
  of God altogether yet. I still think that there is some
• 1:24:16
  kind of infinite force behind all of this.
• 1:24:21
  I don't know if it is a quote unquote.
• 1:24:23
  God I don't even know if it's intelligent.
• 1:24:26
  I just know that there is a reflection of me all throughout.
• 1:24:33
  Universe and I see it when I look around, you know, and that
• 1:24:39
  to me is proof that that I should be trying to improve my
• 1:24:44
  spiritual Oneness, with the world because the world has
• 1:24:48
  already proven to me that I am a reflection of it, so that's kind
• 1:24:55
  of where, where I'm at. You say are the biggest Lessons
• 1:25:02
  or takeaways. From taoism that you've
• 1:25:06
  discovered. So there's there are many but
• 1:25:13
  the ones that I love the most are removing desires and
• 1:25:18
  perception. I made a video a while ago where
• 1:25:22
  I said that desires are poison, we get it in our heads that we
• 1:25:27
  would want to do a thing, but we get it in our heads that we want
• 1:25:31
  to do that thing because we have an expectation.
• 1:25:34
  Of what the results will be, you know, to be frank, when I agreed
• 1:25:40
  to do the podcast with you, I had it in my head that the
• 1:25:43
  results would be, maybe more. People would follow me on Tick,
• 1:25:48
  Tock and twitch and maybe I would stop.
• 1:25:52
  But as we started talking, I was like, oh no, this is much better
• 1:25:57
  if I'm not trying to grow my audience.
• 1:25:59
  If I'm just having a good conversation with a cool dude.
• 1:26:04
  I mean, so I would just say I'm not on our side there like I
• 1:26:07
  wish it was that way. I apologize too many of my
• 1:26:10
  guests because you know many of them have wanted this.
• 1:26:15
  Well, I know that the reason they appear on my show is maybe
• 1:26:19
  to reach a new audience or whatever.
• 1:26:21
  And I mean it's I just is what we're all.
• 1:26:23
  Just that's just not something I can do.
• 1:26:26
  I can give you a chance to be a good conversation and but
• 1:26:29
  unfortunately I don't have a big following or anything like that
• 1:26:32
  but that's that Living in the moment.
• 1:26:34
  If you get rid of the desire for the results that you think you
• 1:26:39
  want and you do a thing because it's the thing that you are
• 1:26:43
  wanting to do, right? You will be surprised by the
• 1:26:47
  results and so getting rid of your desires as a way to
• 1:26:51
  appreciate the surprise that comes from life, you audition
• 1:26:57
  for a role with the expectation that you will either get the
• 1:27:02
  role or you will get relief. Ejected and maybe something in
• 1:27:06
  the middle happens, maybe you didn't get the role, but you met
• 1:27:09
  someone who was like, hey, I've got this other part that I was
• 1:27:12
  thinking about you for. You had no idea that that was
• 1:27:16
  even a possibility going into this situation and if your
• 1:27:20
  desires are all wrapped up in, gotta get the role, gotta get
• 1:27:25
  this part. You're closing yourself off to
• 1:27:27
  the possibility of other things coming in.
• 1:27:32
  And so, you know, one of the things taoism says, early is get
• 1:27:36
  rid of your desires, but then it never says, don't do the things
• 1:27:39
  you want to do to do them because you want to do them.
• 1:27:43
  You know, they talk about athletes and they say that the
• 1:27:46
  best athletes are the ones who want to compete with opponents
• 1:27:51
  who are at the top of their game.
• 1:27:53
  Not because they want to beat someone who is the best, but
• 1:27:57
  because they have a love of the activity and they want everyone
• 1:28:02
  to be at the top of their game. They don't want to deflate
• 1:28:05
  footballs because that will let them win another Super Bowl.
• 1:28:10
  Like that's not. That was mm, that's terrible.
• 1:28:13
  So, abandoning desires is one of the first things to do.
• 1:28:16
  The second thing to do is to be whole, we yourself.
• 1:28:20
  And this is where I am. Well I'm struggling with all of
• 1:28:22
  them. I mean, come on, nobody's
• 1:28:23
  perfect, but They break it down into being excellent.
• 1:28:30
  You just well, they don't say be excellent, but they essentially
• 1:28:33
  say do what is natural to you and because it was natural to
• 1:28:38
  you. Others will look at it and say
• 1:28:41
  this person is amazing. This person is so good at this
• 1:28:46
  thing but all you were doing was what was natural?
• 1:28:48
  You know, you didn't like breathing and that's the concept
• 1:28:52
  of being excellent. And then finally.
• 1:28:56
  Thing limitations, whether that be that, you know, things and
• 1:29:01
  people die or just accepting the fact that you cannot do
• 1:29:04
  everything. When you can accept that there
• 1:29:08
  are limits, you are able to look around and find alternate paths.
• 1:29:13
  You know, if you look at a river, a river doesn't stop when
• 1:29:17
  it hits a rock. It doesn't hit that rock and go.
• 1:29:21
  Oh, how are we going to get through this?
• 1:29:24
  It moves around it, it It flows, it goes, whichever way it means
• 1:29:29
  to go because there are going to be things that will limit you in
• 1:29:33
  life. You can either get hung up on
• 1:29:35
  those things or just move on. And so, you know, those are
• 1:29:39
  probably the three big tenants be desireless.
• 1:29:44
  Be excellent. And be gone, but there are other
• 1:29:49
  things like, I'm going to get it wrong.
• 1:29:51
  I think it's Wei Wu Wei. It essentially means action
• 1:29:54
  through inaction. It says stop trying to metal and
• 1:30:00
  get involved in everything and instead do the most natural
• 1:30:05
  thing to do and if the most natural thing to do is nothing
• 1:30:10
  congrats, you did it except that doing nothing was the correct
• 1:30:15
  answer. And that's the thing that people
• 1:30:18
  have a lot of trouble with. And then another thing, that
• 1:30:23
  people often get hung up on his self, Science.
• 1:30:26
  We live in a capitalistic Society where you have to have
• 1:30:29
  money to live and so self-reliance sounds like find a
• 1:30:35
  way to make money but what it really means is accepting who
• 1:30:39
  you are and that's a very hard thing to do.
• 1:30:43
  You know saying all right this is where my limitations and and
• 1:30:47
  now I need to go look for help. I need to be able to say okay
• 1:30:52
  this this is as far as I can go but I bet someone else can do.
• 1:30:56
  More and going with that, I'm a big fan of The Walking Dead and
• 1:31:02
  the fear that that Walking Dead TV shows and bring this up
• 1:31:05
  because I feel like one thing that doesn't or at least I've
• 1:31:10
  not seen discussed, is how on the nose.
• 1:31:13
  They are about like human nature and what we're like and the
• 1:31:18
  internet and there's going to be spoilers.
• 1:31:20
  I have you. Listen, I've not wisely, but I
• 1:31:22
  did read one of the comic books so Okay, I might have some
• 1:31:28
  knowledge, I just don't know. What I will say is I try to give
• 1:31:31
  to any spoilers but what I will say is that they reflect
• 1:31:34
  everything from society trying to claw back, what it wants had
• 1:31:39
  and what that would look like to, you know, just living in a
• 1:31:43
  kind of a lawless State and what that looks like and you know,
• 1:31:47
  killing versus choosing not to kill and and I'm still in the
• 1:31:52
  midst of finishing off Fear, The Walking Dead at the moment.
• 1:31:55
  And it's to me, it's a really accurate representation of The
• 1:32:03
  Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of humanity, you know, that you can
• 1:32:07
  have a side of humanity and heroics ISM in dark times but
• 1:32:11
  also the dark times breed there are terrible deeds and that you
• 1:32:16
  know sometimes a good person can do bad things vice versa.
• 1:32:21
  Yeah. And I think that is very true
• 1:32:25
  and one of the things that I didn't mention from taoism
• 1:32:29
  because it's a hard subject is the you know, removing purse.
• 1:32:33
  Options. Because when you name something
• 1:32:36
  as good, you create bad, the symbol that most people
• 1:32:41
  associate with taoism is the yin yang and they look at it as two
• 1:32:46
  half circles connected, whereas the Dow is the whole circle.
• 1:32:51
  It is both the good and the evil.
• 1:32:54
  It's the hurricane and it's the quiet summer days.
• 1:32:59
  Like it's, it's everything. And nothing all at once.
• 1:33:05
  And so, you know, a lot of times.
• 1:33:07
  And this is the thing that I struggle with the most, because
• 1:33:09
  I live in America and we have a crazy political system right now
• 1:33:15
  and it's tempting to look at what some people are doing and
• 1:33:19
  saying those are bad actions. Those are evil actions and in my
• 1:33:24
  gut, they are definitely nothing that I would do personally but
• 1:33:29
  at the same time they are being done.
• 1:33:32
  I could either sit here and whale at the fact that that
• 1:33:38
  nothing changes and everything is evil or I could accept that
• 1:33:43
  things to happen and I need to be flexible and change with the
• 1:33:47
  world and the way that I would rather change is in a way that
• 1:33:51
  at that, accepts more kindness and projects more, you know,
• 1:33:59
  goodness on, do others what I Define as good.
• 1:34:03
  There's a verse in the Dow that says when a person is good to
• 1:34:06
  me, I am good to them. When a person is bad to me, I am
• 1:34:09
  good to them. That way in all things I do.
• 1:34:13
  I am spreading goodness. I'm only responsible for myself.
• 1:34:16
  I cannot change the actions of the politicians in charge.
• 1:34:20
  I can write as many letters as I want.
• 1:34:23
  Thank thing gonna listen to me. So instead I just gotta try to
• 1:34:28
  be nice to the people. I interact with, you know,
• 1:34:31
  kindness is free. So, I should really use it up.
• 1:34:35
  Completely agree. Let's switch up some fun.
• 1:34:39
  A few questions for you. What's the best advice you've
• 1:34:42
  ever received? Hmm. that's a really good
• 1:34:51
  question because I've received a lot of terrible advice,
• 1:34:55
  throughout my life, You know, I'd say probably one of the best
• 1:35:04
  pieces of advice that I ever got was not to speak, was to just
• 1:35:10
  listen and I, you know, there's a lot of malicious compliance
• 1:35:16
  with that, where I will go to a meeting and just be silent from
• 1:35:20
  minute 12-minute last. But when I'm taking it at heart,
• 1:35:26
  when I am doing, what the actual advice is it is usually doing
• 1:35:31
  the math and saying I have two ears and one mouth so I should
• 1:35:34
  listen twice as much as I speak and in a conversation with with
• 1:35:40
  people, I try not to see this is hard because we've been talking
• 1:35:47
  for what two hours about and so it's hard to be like, I try not
• 1:35:51
  to speak too much but genuinely and most social interactions, I
• 1:35:56
  really just want to Listen and take it all in.
• 1:36:00
  If the spotlight falls on me, I'm going to try to perform
• 1:36:04
  because that's my training. But when there's no Spotlight,
• 1:36:09
  usually I'm just quietly listening and trying to
• 1:36:13
  understand where people are coming from.
• 1:36:14
  So I guess the best advice that I ever got was to do the math
• 1:36:19
  and realize, I have two ears and one mouth.
• 1:36:22
  My stuff. What's the biggest life lesson
• 1:36:25
  you've learned so far to accept myself?
• 1:36:31
  I'm not there all the way. There are many things that I
• 1:36:34
  would love to change about myself, but on my best days,
• 1:36:40
  those are the days when I look at myself as a complete person,
• 1:36:44
  who belongs here, who has a place on, you know, this
• 1:36:51
  physical Airplane. And I should accept that and be
• 1:36:56
  happy with the fact that I am here experiencing now.
• 1:36:59
  You know, there's no guarantee that I'll get to experience
• 1:37:02
  tomorrow, and I definitely can't experience yesterday, but I got
• 1:37:07
  right now. And that's pretty dope, amazing
• 1:37:10
  stuff. It's been a real pleasure
• 1:37:12
  speaking with you semi and getting to know you and sharing
• 1:37:15
  a bit of your story. Just want to say a massive,
• 1:37:17
  thank you for appearing on the show.
• 1:37:19
  Oh, Chris. And I am so glad that you
• 1:37:21
  invited me. This was one of the best.
• 1:37:23
  Conversations I've had in a long time so I am genuinely grateful
• 1:37:27
  to have had this chat. Do you have any upcoming
• 1:37:30
  projects will final thoughts, you'd like to share with our
• 1:37:32
  listeners? I got back into streaming on
• 1:37:37
  Twitch. Same username be Sammy, Davis
• 1:37:39
  and doing it. Four nights a week.
• 1:37:41
  I'm a variety streamer. So on those, four nights a week,
• 1:37:44
  it's a different game. I would love to have you guys
• 1:37:49
  following me on Tick Tock because that's that's kind of my
• 1:37:51
  main Jam. I have a few things I'm working
• 1:37:56
  on, but I never like to tell people what the projects are,
• 1:37:59
  because I might hate it and it might change.
• 1:38:05
  But you know I have found that where my life was the last time,
• 1:38:13
  my life was at its lowest. When I threw myself into taoism,
• 1:38:18
  I learned a lot about myself and was surprised at the results of
• 1:38:21
  what happened. So I'm kind of doing the same
• 1:38:23
  Same thing again. I have a second Tick Tock
• 1:38:27
  Channel called the novice Taoist, which I think is kind of
• 1:38:32
  funny because, you know, if you're talking about an infinite
• 1:38:35
  thing, I'm always going to be the novice and that's perfect
• 1:38:39
  but I would prefer to never be called The Master because that
• 1:38:42
  means I did something wrong. But with that, I'm also working
• 1:38:49
  on some writings that that I might put on the internet, I
• 1:38:52
  might keep them. This for me, they might just be
• 1:38:54
  my own thing. So so that's what I can say
• 1:38:57
  about projects. Awesome, awesome.
• 1:39:00
  Why I wish you the best of luck with with everything.
• 1:39:02
  And once again, thank you so much for appearing on the show
• 1:39:05
  but a real pleasure. Thank you.
• 1:39:07
  It was my pleasure and to all the mysteries of the Christian
• 1:39:10
  way. Podcast is always be safe.
• 1:39:13
  Be well, and I'll see you in the next one.