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Wonderland Poetry Slam | Alice in Wonderland Adventure | Stories for Kids · Dorktales Storytime | Stories for Kids Who Love Big Adventures

• 1:10
  Mad Hatter: Hello, Dork Squad.
• 1:11
  Mad Hatter: I'm Jonathan Cormur, and you're listening to Dork Tales Storytime, the podcast for kids and their pop culture loving grown-ups.
• 1:23
  Theme Song: It's a beautiful day for a story, adventuring glory, new friends and old ones too.
• 1:30
  Theme Song: It's an excellent day to get swept away in a tale, so let us regale you
• 1:43
  Redge: Blue True Crew No no no Shoe Yes Sho no no no
• 1:54
  Jonathan: Hi Redge
• 1:56
  Redge: Boo No Flew Brew Hm Too?
• 2:03
  Jonathan: Redge
• 2:04
  Redge: Mew Yes that's it Mew Wait, is Mew a word?
• 2:09
  Jonathan: I believe a cat can mew, but I think they mostly just meow.
• 2:15
  Redge: Thank goodness you're here, Jonathan.
• 2:18
  Redge: This poetry stuff is harder than it seems.
• 2:20
  Redge: I can't find the right word to rhyme with blue.
• 2:24
  Jonathan: Well, what you got so far?
• 2:27
  Redge: Roses are red, violets are blue.
• 2:30
  Redge: If I were a cat, I'd usually meow, but on occasion, perhaps, maybe I would Mew?
• 2:37
  Jonathan: Oh.
• 2:39
  Redge: Yes, I know.
• 2:40
  Redge: I know it needs work.
• 2:41
  Redge: The rhythm is all wrong.
• 2:43
  Redge: Aha! What about this?
• 2:46
  Redge: Daisies are white.
• 2:47
  Redge: Sunflowers are yellow.
• 2:49
  Redge: Look at you.
• 2:50
  Redge: Aren't you a nice cello?
• 2:54
  Jonathan: I've never been called a cello before, but uh thanks.
• 3:00
  Redge: Cello, no, that's not right.
• 3:03
  Redge: Why would I say cello?
• 3:04
  Redge: I need help.
• 3:07
  Jonathan: Maybe you just need some inspiration.
• 3:10
  Redge: That's it, Jonathan.
• 3:11
  Redge: I need to learn from the best.
• 3:13
  Redge: Come, come.
• 3:14
  Redge: There's not a moment to spare.
• 3:16
  Jonathan: Sure.
• 3:16
  Jonathan: Wait, hold on.
• 3:18
  Jonathan: Where are we headed exactly?
• 3:20
  Redge: Wonderland, of course.
• 3:22
  Redge: The final round of the Wonderland Poetry Slam is today.
• 3:26
  Redge: Mad Hatter is taking on the Cheshire in a battle of puns, rhymes, and turns of phrases.
• 3:33
  Jonathan: Ooh, how exciting!
• 3:35
  Redge: Yes, truly titillating.
• 3:37
  Redge: Let's get to the rabbit hole on the edge of the forest.
• 3:39
  Redge: Come, come! Yeah, here we are.
• 3:42
  Redge: Alright, down we go!
• 3:45
  Jonathan: Right behind you, Wonderland! What a magical place!
• 3:55
  Redge: And look, the flowers are in full bloom!
• 3:59
  Flowers: You bet we are!
• 4:01
  Jonathan: Hello, flowers.
• 4:02
  Jonathan: I never seen your petals quite so luminous.
• 4:05
  Redge: Simply radiant.
• 4:07
  Flowers: Ooh! Say more.
• 4:10
  Flowers: How kind they are
• 4:16
  Mad Hatter: No Stop.
• 4:26
  Redge: Oh, the mad hatters coming down the path.
• 4:28
  Redge: Just the person I needed to see.
• 4:31
  Mad Hatter: Hello, Redge.
• 4:32
  Mad Hatter: I uh I he
• 4:44
  Jonathan: Gesundheit
• 4:45
  Mad Hatter: Thank you, Jonathan.
• 4:47
  Mad Hatter: I've been sneezing all day long.
• 4:49
  Mad Hatter: And now I hate to say it.
• 4:54
  Redge: What is it?
• 4:56
  Mad Hatter: No no, I must not say it aloud.
• 4:58
  Mad Hatter: I'll jinx it.
• 5:00
  Jonathan: Jinx what?
• 5:01
  Mad Hatter: The big poetry slam is today.
• 5:04
  Mad Hatter: I've made it to the final round.
• 5:06
  Mad Hatter: It's me against the Cheshire cat, but I
• 5:14
  Jonathan: What?
• 5:16
  Mad Hatter: I can't I can't ask to stop I can't stop sneezing Gagapoof
• 5:28
  Redge: Gesundheit
• 5:30
  Mad Hatter: thank you.
• 5:31
  Jonathan: How will you ever compete?
• 5:33
  Redge: How will you throw witty quips of rhyming verse?
• 5:37
  Mad Hatter: I don't know.
• 5:38
  Mad Hatter: It's all these flowers.
• 5:40
  Mad Hatter: They're spreading their pollen everywhere.
• 5:43
  Mad Hatter: It's making me sneeze.
• 5:46
  Flowers: Don't blame us.
• 5:47
  Flowers: It's not our fault.
• 5:49
  Flowers: We can't help it if you can't handle what we're dishing out.
• 5:54
  Mad Hatter: Ugh.
• 5:55
  Mad Hatter: We have to think of something.
• 5:57
  Jonathan: Have you tried some sort of face covering?
• 6:00
  Redge: Great idea, Jonathan.
• 6:01
  Redge: Uh how about your hat?
• 6:03
  Mad Hatter: My hat?
• 6:04
  Redge: Yes, just pull your hat over your face.
• 6:07
  Mad Hatter: Over my face?
• 6:09
  Jonathan: Sure.
• 6:10
  Jonathan: With your hat over your face, the flower pollen won't be able to get into your nose.
• 6:15
  Mad Hatter: Oh, all right.
• 6:15
  Mad Hatter: I'll give it a try.
• 6:17
  Mad Hatter: Oh, hold on.
• 6:19
  Redge: What is it?
• 6:19
  Mad Hatter: I'll need to empty out my hat first.
• 6:21
  Mad Hatter: I keep quite a few things in it.
• 6:23
  Mad Hatter: Uh could you hold this?
• 6:29
  Jonathan: A tea kettle.
• 6:30
  Jonathan: You had a tea kettle in your hat.
• 6:33
  Mad Hatter: Well, that's my travel tea set.
• 6:35
  Mad Hatter: I never leave the house without it.
• 6:37
  Redge: Ooh, the kettle's still hot.
• 6:39
  Mad Hatter: Wanna cup?
• 6:40
  Jonathan: I'm okay for now.
• 6:41
  Redge: Anything else in there?
• 6:43
  Mad Hatter: Uh let's see.
• 6:44
  Mad Hatter: Don't need that.
• 6:46
  Mad Hatter: Useless.
• 6:49
  Mad Hatter: Charles, you're not supposed to be in there.
• 6:52
  Mad Hatter: Uh right, okay.
• 6:54
  Redge: Uh is your hat empty now?
• 6:57
  Mad Hatter: Hmm, should be.
• 6:58
  Mad Hatter: Now, I just pull it over my face, you say?
• 7:02
  Jonathan: Uh that should keep the pollen out.
• 7:04
  Mad Hatter: Okay.
• 7:04
  Mad Hatter: Like that?
• 7:07
  Mad Hatter: That?
• 7:08
  Mad Hatter: That?
• 7:08
  Mad Hatter: That?
• 7:09
  Mad Hatter: Oh, what's happening, happening, happening?
• 7:12
  Redge: Oh no.
• 7:13
  Redge: The inside of his hat creates an echo.
• 7:16
  Redge: He can't perform rhythmic poetry with an echo.
• 7:19
  Mad Hatter: Well, at least I stop sneezing, sneezing, sneezing, sneezing.
• 7:23
  Redge: We have to find another solution.
• 7:26
  Flowers: Oh no, you don't, little bee! Would you skee daddle?
• 7:29
  Flowers: No, no, not on my nose!
• 7:34
  Jonathan: Follow that bee!
• 7:36
  Redge: Jonathan?
• 7:37
  Jonathan: That bee just took pollen from the flowers to make honey.
• 7:40
  Jonathan: Maybe the honey will calm the mad hatter's allergies.
• 7:43
  Redge: The bee's honey will have the same elements as the flower's pollen.
• 7:47
  Jonathan: And if he eats the honey, his body will recognize the pollen and stop him from sneezing every time he breathes it in.
• 7:54
  Redge: A natural remedy! Let's go.
• 7:57
  Mad Hatter: Uh guys, guys?
• 7:59
  Mad Hatter: Which way?
• 7:59
  Mad Hatter: Way?
• 8:00
  Mad Hatter: I can't see a thing in this hat hat.
• 8:04
  Redge: Uh whoops.
• 8:05
  Jonathan: Uh grab my hand, Mr.
• 8:07
  Jonathan: Hatter.
• 8:08
  Redge: This way.
• 8:09
  Redge: Uh excuse us.
• 8:22
  Jonathan: Oh pardon our intrusion.
• 8:29
  Redge: Uh I say uh hello there.
• 8:37
  Mad Hatter: Oh would you kindly quiet down, down, down, down.
• 8:42
  Bumble B. Bee: If you're here for my honey, you can't have it.
• 8:47
  Jonathan: Oh no.
• 8:49
  Redge: Why not?
• 8:50
  Mad Hatter: But I need it, need it, need it.
• 8:53
  Bumble B. Bee: If I give you some, then I'll have to give it away to all the bears and honey badgers in Wonderland.
• 9:02
  Bumble B. Bee: Not to mention all the tea lovers and granola moms.
• 9:07
  Bumble B. Bee: No, I won't do it.
• 9:15
  Jonathan: What if we gave you something for it?
• 9:17
  Redge: Good thinking, Jonathan.
• 9:18
  Redge: Maybe we can exchange something for some honey.
• 9:22
  Bumble B. Bee: No bargaining.
• 9:23
  Bumble B. Bee: No thank you.
• 9:28
  Mad Hatter: I know what the bee wants, wants, wants.
• 9:31
  Redge: You do?
• 9:32
  Mad Hatter: Just listen to its beautiful tone, tone, tone.
• 9:36
  Jonathan: Well, you do have a nice singing voice.
• 9:38
  Bumble B. Bee: You really think so?
• 9:40
  Redge: The strength and pure tone of your voice cannot be denied.
• 9:45
  Mad Hatter: What if I let you be my opener for the poetry slam slam slam?
• 9:49
  Mad Hatter: You can sing a solo before I come out.
• 9:51
  Mad Hatter: Out, ow.
• 9:54
  Bumble B. Bee: But you always let the flowers perform before you.
• 9:58
  Mad Hatter: Not this year, year, year.
• 10:00
  Mad Hatter: You're the only bee for me, me, me.
• 10:04
  Jonathan: What do you say, bee?
• 10:05
  Redge: Is it a deal?
• 10:07
  Bumble B. Bee: How much honey do you need?
• 10:10
  Jonathan: Uh just a spoonful will do.
• 10:13
  Bumble B. Bee: Alright, here you go.
• 10:15
  Bumble B. Bee: But don't go telling anyone I did this, okay?
• 10:19
  Redge: Thank you.
• 10:20
  Redge: Now you can take off your hat and have this honey.
• 10:26
  Mad Hatter: Let's hope this works.
• 10:29
  Bumble B. Bee: Did it work?
• 10:31
  Redge: Only one way to find out.
• 10:33
  Jonathan: Is it time for the poetry slam?
• 10:35
  Redge: There's not a moment to spare.
• 10:58
  L.C. Wonderman: Give some snaps for the Cheshire.
• 11:02
  L.C. Wonderman: Going toe to toe and word for word against the cool cat himself is you know him by his laugh.
• 11:17
  L.C. Wonderman: You love him for his um birthday celebrations.
• 11:20
  L.C. Wonderman: It's the one and only Mad Hatter.
• 11:24
  L.C. Wonderman: But first, a special treat as sweet as his honey.
• 11:35
  L.C. Wonderman: We have the vocal stylings of Bumble B. Bee
• 11:44
  Redge: How are you feeling, Mad Hatter?
• 11:46
  Mad Hatter: No sneezes yet.
• 11:48
  Jonathan: That's great.
• 11:48
  Jonathan: The honey must be working.
• 11:55
  Bumble B. Bee: Yeah.
• 11:56
  Redge: Alright, you're up.
• 11:57
  Redge: Go get 'em.
• 11:59
  L.C. Wonderman: Now to the stage.
• 12:00
  L.C. Wonderman: The Mad Cap, Mad Hatter.
• 12:06
  Mad Hatter: Springtime in Wonderland right now, you see, is everything you could dream it would be.
• 12:14
  Mad Hatter: Except one tiny problem that I face.
• 12:17
  Mad Hatter: I sneeze, I wheeze.
• 12:20
  Mad Hatter: There is no time to brace.
• 12:23
  Redge: He's like Quilliam Shakespeare.
• 12:26
  Jonathan: Very impressive.
• 12:28
  Mad Hatter: I could not stop this air that I did bellow.
• 12:31
  Mad Hatter: Pollen up the nose of this poor fellow.
• 12:35
  Mad Hatter: Blooming flowers spread their dust everywhere, wishing to hide inside of my underwear.
• 12:44
  Mad Hatter: Lucky for me I have good friends today that eased my tickly nose right away.
• 12:51
  Mad Hatter: So now I eh or when I eh then I eh
• 12:57
  Jonathan: Oh no
• 12:59
  Redge: He's going to sneeze
• 13:06
  Mad Hatter: My sneezes Hooray
• 13:10
  Jonathan: but he still made it rhyme.
• 13:11
  Redge: And kept the pentameter too.
• 13:14
  Jonathan: Snaps all around
• 13:23
  L.C. Wonderman: Give it up for the master craftsman, Madcap Haberdasher.
• 13:27
  L.C. Wonderman: Mad Hatter.
• 13:29
  Redge: Nice save, Mad Hatter.
• 13:32
  Mad Hatter: Oh thank you.
• 13:33
  Mad Hatter: It wasn't what I had planned, but sometimes you just have to go with the flow.
• 13:39
  Jonathan: I know I'm inspired.
• 13:40
  Jonathan: What about you, Redge?
• 13:41
  Jonathan: Do you think you can finish your poem now?
• 13:44
  Redge: I think I'll try my hand at Scat instead.
• 13:48
  Redge: Be Baba Zubazoo Baba Zoo Wee Doah
• 13:54
  Jonathan: Oh, Redge.
• 13:55
  Mad Hatter: Mr Hatter! Over here Us flowers would like a word with you.
• 14:02
  Mad Hatter: Yes, we believe your poem may be spreading a misconception about us flowers.
• 14:08
  Mad Hatter: Our pollen isn't just everywhere.
• 14:11
  Redge: Oh, they really seem uh huh.
• 14:14
  Jonathan: Yeah, I see what they mean, but uh
• 14:17
  Mad Hatter: even now we can't stop from ah ah
• 14:22
  All: kafleweeee!
• 14:24
  Flowers: Oh sorry!
• 14:28
  Jonathan: This has been a Jon in Character production.
• 14:30
  Jonathan: This story was written by Monique Hafen Adams, edited by Molly Murphy, and performed by Jonathan Cormur.
• 14:36
  Jonathan: Sound recording and production by Jermaine Hamilton at Pacific Grove Soundworks.
• 14:41
  Jonathan: We love hearing from you.
• 14:43
  Jonathan: Contact us at DorkTalesstorytime at gmail.com or try our one-way text feature as a safe way to reach out.
• 14:51
  Jonathan: You can find even more ways to reach us in the show notes.
• 14:55
  Jonathan: Now, go be the hero of your own story.
• 14:57
  Jonathan: and we'll see you next, once upon a time.