Latest / 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids. / Your Words Matter

Transcript

Your Words Matter · 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids.

• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: Your words matter.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: Have you ever heard a parent, perhaps in a grocery store, yelling at their kids, berating them, telling them they are good for nothing?
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: I cringe when I hear things like that, because words, especially our words as parents, have the power to actually shape how a child sees themselves now and in the future.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: We know how someone's harsh or critical words can hurt us even as adults, and it's even more hurtful for a child who has no experience in knowing how to accept or reject or evaluate what they hear about themselves.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: There's been a lot of research done on the effects of criticism and negative words on children.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_00: It has been scientifically shown that in order for a child to develop a positive view of themselves, they need at least five positive interactions to every one negative interaction.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: Do you remember the movie The Help?
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: It was in 2011.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_00: Abilene is an African American maid living in Jackson, Mississippi.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: She cares for Elizabeth's daughter, May, whom Elizabeth does not really treat well, but Abilene holds the child on her lap and she repeats to her, You is kind, you is smart, you is important.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: Kids don't come into this world knowing that they're loved, special, have a purpose, and have the power to change the world.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: They have to be told this, and we as parents need to constantly let our kids know they are loved by God and by us and that they matter.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: The purpose of our words should be to affirm, protect, and encourage our children so that they know they are loved, capable, worthy, and brave.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: Think about it, God used only his words when he spoke the universe into existence.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: In the book of Genesis, we see that God made us in his image and after his likeness.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: Therefore, we were created to be imitators of the way God operates.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: Our words have power.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: Proverbs 1831 says, Death and life are in the power of the tongue.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: Our tongue can be used as a weapon to harm and destroy, or as a tool to build up and heal.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: In our everyday busy lives, we often don't even notice our words.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: We correct our children, sometimes even nag.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: It takes intention to speak positive and encouraging words.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: In the notes for this podcast, I've put a link to a list of short positive phrases you can use to encourage your child.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: You can download the PDF or print it out.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: Be deliberate about speaking words of encouraging, encouragement, writing them notes, and putting them in your child's lunchbox, leaving them on their pillow at bedtime or under their plate at mealtime.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_00: Aim to offer these positive affirmations at least five times daily.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: Let's encourage our children so they can become all they were created to be.