Latest / Dad Needs To Talk / Farewell 2021: Broken Equivalent Exchange

Transcript

Farewell 2021: Broken Equivalent Exchange · Dad Needs To Talk

0:04
What's up y'all? Bishop our drummer from Daddy's
0:08
talk and that's what we're going to be doing.
0:12
Just talking. I want to do just one final
0:16
send-off for 2021 for y'all, but primarily for has kind of like a
0:29
little time capsule. this moment in time of my life so I'm trying
0:40
to make it be too long but I do hope you know that y'all We'll
0:47
listen. So pretty much as what I've
0:52
titled this broken Equivalent Exchange.
0:56
As many of y'all know I love Fullmetal Alchemist is my
1:00
all-time favorite series. Got a freakin Ouroboros tattoo
1:06
on my shoulder. Love it.
1:09
And we all know, you know, the Law of Equivalent Exchange.
1:14
I work to gain something something of Equal or greater
1:19
value must be given. and I feel like, This year.
1:28
Is the definition of that. For me personally.
1:31
So I just want to just kind of just like sit just talk with
1:34
y'all and just kind of Look back on this year, both the good and
1:41
the bad. And I hope that anybody is
1:45
watching this or listening to this.
1:48
This is kind of a like I said, a time capsule to kind of give you
1:54
a speedy version of me of Robert.
1:57
The guy behind that is to talk the voice behind that need to
2:02
talk. Just because there's a lot of
2:05
stuff that goes on. I don't talk about every
2:08
freaking thing that happens. Because if it's okay, if I talk
2:12
about every single thing, every single struggle that I've gone
2:16
through and this year alone. Yeah, I'll be like, man, why are
2:20
you still podcasting? You got more important things,
2:24
you probably should be taken care of, but I do this because I
2:27
love it, and it's also a Form of therapy for me.
2:32
So imma try not to belabor the point while try to go too long
2:36
but just in case and forgive me for some of y'all that, you
2:42
know, that have been here this whole time.
2:44
They already know all the stories and stuff.
2:46
But in order for me to do this properly, to kind of talk about
2:51
some stuff, put some stuff behind me and also, I just want
2:55
to say upfront. Also, this will not just be a
2:57
full sad Town episode mini-episode.
3:02
This is both to to look back on. The.
3:08
Bad Crazy Life stuff. That's happened as well as the
3:12
good that has come out of this year as well.
3:15
So to start off, we need to go back a little bit before 2021
3:22
began to the end of 2020. Yeah, the end of 2020 because as
3:28
much as motivated as most of y'all know the reason going for
3:32
me starting this podcast originally was because I was
3:35
dealing with a lot of built-up grief and life stuff.
3:38
On on. So here we go.
3:42
October 20, 20. My older sister passed away.
3:48
Two days before Christmas of 2020, my wife's grandfather, who
3:53
was basically her father passed away, and we also had some other
3:57
crazy stuff going on. Health concern, wives with the
4:01
kids mixed in there that I would not go into, but just know stuff
4:05
happen. Fast forward to start of 2021.
4:09
And my birthday was kind of okay, but you know, of course,
4:13
still kind of sad a little bit from the end of 2020, then the
4:17
end of January of twenty Twenty-One.
4:21
My mother passed away, then we had the hellish Texas.
4:28
Snowpocalypse that happened a couple weeks prior to that are
4:35
couple weeks after that, I should say.
4:38
And also while this is going on, keep in mind, this is doing a
4:41
time to where I am a contractor in my job so I did not have
4:47
bereavement time. I did not have PTO.
4:50
So I took where days I could here and there to try to know
4:55
get through my sister situation. I took even longer off, I just
4:59
was like, you know what? Screw it.
5:01
I need the time because this is too much and so that started
5:06
another issue, which was Financial woes that have
5:10
continued to follow me, through the end of this year, just
5:12
because, you know, how you lie. You just a few days here and
5:15
there. I want to check up on a couple
5:17
more, or one pay period. That I pretty much between
5:22
between my mother passing, and then the snow storm happening.
5:27
I pretty much Miss close to Mother work.
5:31
And fast forward a little bit more than just some good stuff.
5:37
Where You know. it's part of the podcast, know that over March,
5:46
got things going there and just kind of Festival because I kind
5:51
of want to get all the bad stuff out, the way up front, like a
5:56
move on to the more positive stuff or maybe not necessarily
5:59
like 100% bad but just stuff it just kind of just Worried me a
6:04
lot during the summer, you know, myself my daughter, my oldest
6:10
daughter does track. She went to State again but I
6:14
feel like I failed as a father as some aspects because We kind
6:20
of Miss manage time horribly. Barely made it there to attract
6:26
me like literally we pulled in the parking lot and my wife had
6:29
to jump out the car while I was still trying to find a place to
6:31
park, running her into the stadium literally right before
6:35
the gunshot off for her stake, meet her first thing.
6:39
I feel horrible Coach Cal to us was like yo are y'all even
6:44
serious about this that it has done is like obviously we are
6:48
serious about this because you know, my daughter's 12 11, at
6:50
the time she's been doing tricks and she was five, of course, we
6:54
are serious about this but I do also understand, you know, the
6:58
coaches points and stuff whatever.
7:01
And of course I felt horrible dad.
7:03
I was like man. You know, we missed all of the
7:07
previous year because of Covenant stuff, she came back,
7:10
strong dominating like she needed miss a year and then I
7:15
dropped the ball as a parent there at the finish line.
7:19
I must literally and she didn't Place good in that race or
7:24
whatever and I just feel like cuz it feel like okay she used
7:28
in this long car ride. Because it was like a 68 hour,
7:34
however, long car ride or whatever.
7:35
So then the car that long all day that just no time to warm up
7:40
or whatever anyway that happened.
7:46
And then of course, you know, in the mixture of all the stuff
7:49
going on, whatever of course of course like still being reminded
7:54
of stuff of my mother and sister because you know, we went
7:57
through Mother's Day. That was tough.
8:00
No. Kind of the first time I had to
8:01
deal with, you know, coming back from from a weekend.
8:06
Is somebody at work? I did intentionally.
8:07
Of course. I just took just the bubbles
8:09
like, hey, bro, how was your mother's day and then if he
8:12
remembered he's like, sorry, dude, I'm like, I understand,
8:17
you know, it is what it is. Then of course, went through my
8:21
mother's birthday, went to my sister's birthday.
8:24
And here we are at the holidays again and Things are starting to
8:30
build up to look good. Then unfortunately, both my wife
8:36
and Vash tested positive for covid.
8:40
That was bad enough on its own but it was even worse because we
8:46
know citizen. I'm not the sort of showing
8:49
until after him until after Vashon.
8:51
The other kids were gone to their great, grandmother's house
8:55
with a bunch of their other cousins for the Christmas break.
8:59
So now that spread to other kids in the house, it was a crap
9:04
show. Luckily I didn't get it.
9:08
You know I had some Minor stuff. But never, you know, got in
9:14
myself now, wrapping up the year, everybody's good and
9:19
healthy and stuff. But it's just like, can't we
9:23
freaking catch a break this year, but And so once again,
9:33
they'll just crazy life situation.
9:35
Now, I did recently, you know, just get switched over for a
9:40
time to my job but of course, No basically starting from fresh.
9:46
No employee. I have no PTO.
9:50
So I've pretty much missed the last, like, two weeks of work.
9:54
And yeah. So it's just been like a roller
9:59
coaster of a year as far as that stuff goes.
10:06
My grandfather also passed away my purse, my father's dad passed
10:10
away a couple days for Christmas.
10:12
So and it's this, let's lie. I can't even go be with family
10:18
stuff. For I couldn't go and be with
10:19
the family because I believe his services will be on actually
10:23
did. This is going up on New Year's
10:25
Eve. You know, I just couldn't do
10:29
anything but yeah so there's this year has been super rough
10:33
and I guess I'm not you know and I know people said it's the
10:37
whole time but it's like I'm not saying this for a woe is me and
10:42
all this stuff because I know we have all gone through some crazy
10:45
stuff this year. It has been a wild year last
10:48
couple years for everybody but Like I said, this is just me
10:55
talking. Just want y'all to know. more
11:00
about me and just the part like I said, the person behind that
11:05
is talk but Through all the craziness, through all the
11:14
insanity that has happened in the last year and some change.
11:21
Through that. Through these dark times, to be
11:25
honest, and rough times. I am very appreciative of this
11:31
podcast and all the amazing people and things that it is
11:37
brought into my life over this short time.
11:40
I haven't even, you know, I probably sound like a broken
11:42
record but I haven't even Still haven't been doing this for a
11:47
year yet. At this point has been maybe
11:50
like eight, nine months but I have gone so far beyond
11:59
anything. I could have ever hoped or
12:00
dreamed of doing with this. Because like I said, I started
12:05
this podcast just because I was like, I'm going crazy.
12:10
I'm buried at so much grief. And sadness and it's like I cut
12:15
was getting lost and it was like, if I don't do something,
12:20
it's going to get worse as so, I made a choice to grab Life by
12:27
the horns. Yes.
12:29
Start this. And I have got to meet so many
12:34
amazing people. And the fact that now they might
12:39
still doing this. Not much later but I'm also
12:42
doing it in video and have a little sometimes, little fancy
12:47
to have music and all this other stuff along with it is truly
12:53
amazing and along the way of this journey So many of y'all
13:01
have reached out to me, have connected with me in so many
13:07
ways from from. From he know, it's like I've
13:12
been brought into the fold and some of these circles, I am part
13:17
of so many freaking different circles online.
13:20
It is so humbling, and I feel so much love and warmth from the
13:26
community because I have people reaching out being like, yo,
13:31
another black content creator. Yahoo another dad are black dad,
13:36
another parent that's talking. Umaga and nurse stuff and kids
13:41
and stuff like that, too. You know, it's like it's like
13:46
I'm in an awesome group of podcast Community.
13:49
I'm considered a manga tuber disk or a bunch of other Doper,
13:54
manga tubers all types of awesome circles just content
14:00
creators and Dad's doing content blurs, doing content.
14:06
I am part of it all and along the way, you know, and of
14:11
course, I can't thank every single person but I you
14:14
definitely want to kind of Point out some people Kendra the host
14:21
of the my hero Academia podcast and make a pod.
14:25
She was the first person that Reached out and offered me to
14:32
come on to her show and I was my first sign of just putting my
14:39
wishes out to the world and shooting my shot at it working
14:42
cause I literally just commented underneath.
14:45
One of her Pockets episodes like yeah, it'd be really dope to be
14:48
on your podcast Someday. I'm thinking like a year plus
14:52
and within a matter of days weeks, she reached over days.
14:56
She wished. I said that cool, you seem cool.
14:58
Well, I have your own. In a matter of weeks, I was on
15:01
and I've been on there over a dozen times at this point.
15:08
The host of and figure the language, but the host of let me
15:13
tell you something, bitch, she goes by Roy Roi as her Alias.
15:23
You have been a constant friend there for me because you know,
15:31
We connected because you know she all she also went through,
15:37
or she has gone through what I've got been going through with
15:40
losing a parent, no years making the past.
15:45
So we kind of bonded over that and, you know, she continues to
15:49
be somebody I can reach out to and speak with to my homie,
15:54
Steve AKA Scuba Steve from Inside the Mind of a blurry
16:00
podcast. You've extended your arm of
16:04
friendship and Brotherhood to me man.
16:06
Cuz we've also been able to bond.
16:10
It talked about similar stuff, you know, of, you know, losing
16:14
people, as well as those being able to bond over being a dad,
16:19
dad's in this space and stuff. The homies over it.
16:27
Comedy has podcast Crystal belong and red.
16:33
Y'all show me so much, love all the freaking time and I can't
16:39
thank God enough. Shout out to Lisa, from Wonder
16:45
of anime podcast and her creating a safe space within the
16:50
community for a lot of us to talk and Share stuff with and
16:57
just get to just be be relax and be ourselves around and too.
17:05
My my Young Homie, Chris from anime again, show with no
17:12
bonded. We have done some podcast
17:15
together and we also Bond over basketball because, you know,
17:19
he's finishing up high school as of this time of this recording
17:24
and you know, but he does amazing work on his podcast and
17:29
while still going to school taking college classes and
17:33
playing Tomorrow at a high level and we talked about, you know,
17:37
him playing basketball my kids, playing basketball and just so
17:43
many more people just along the way that it's been there for me
17:50
to my family to, you know, my wife to my kids, to my close
17:56
friends, my my homie couch, if you check it out, listen to
18:01
this, man. No, I love you and your family
18:05
like no other. And I appreciate you your even
18:10
though we might not talk all the time or as frequent as I was
18:14
like, you do keep up with me. I know you keep up with the
18:17
podcast. One of the first people to be a
18:20
listening ear to my post office. I appreciate you, bro.
18:25
And yeah, just so many people, you know, if my nephew Isaiah or
18:32
any of my nieces and nephews or listen to me, love you so much,
18:36
thank you for checking up on me, keeping me.
18:41
Cousins Destiny. If you out there, I hope you're
18:45
safe. We need to catch up and yeah and
18:48
the list can go on and on. But yeah like I said just just
18:53
through this community through all these amazing people.
18:57
And so much more to me kind of coming out my comfort zone a bit
19:04
and I'm going to my first anime convention is and made Dallas
19:08
meeting. Do people.
19:09
They're learning about a dope local thing, called a Dallas
19:15
podcast fast. I'm going to that meeting more
19:18
people. Now, working in connecting, and
19:21
yeah, it's just been such a Lexus sometimes does the balance
19:26
feels off, sometimes it's year with the amount of bad and
19:29
crisis of this happen. To the amazing things that have
19:33
happened and shout out to my manga collection because me
19:38
collecting manga has been another way of keeping my
19:41
sanity. This year, I have found comfort
19:44
in the books And my hobbies and stuff in general, likes it from
19:50
doing this podcast to going out manga shopping because going
19:54
out. And I've talked about it before,
19:55
but going out into a bookstore Books-A-Million Barnes.
19:59
And Nobles, Half Price Books who are ever and just being alone
20:05
surrounded by lots of marker. And the little interactions that
20:11
I've had along the way, the people that I've met along the
20:13
way in those areas and stuff Thank you all just so so
20:18
freaking much from the bottom of my heart.
20:21
And yeah, I just like so I just want to just to kind of say this
20:25
stuff just to kind of get it off my chest to show, some love and
20:29
appreciation to all the awesome people in the community. you
20:35
know, the fact that I've had over over 2,800 downloads on my
20:42
podcast to, I've hit 68 subscribers on the YouTube
20:47
channel just like, Thank you for sticking with me for finding me
20:55
for reaching out. To me, it means the world to me.
21:00
And yeah, I just want, like so I just wanted to do this as a time
21:05
capsule for myself for those of y'all that might find this.
21:12
Whether you're listening to it at the time it comes out or if
21:15
you're a new listener, that found me years later and you're
21:19
going back to the catalog just to see the Journey, of course,
21:23
who knows, who I'm gonna be at this time next year, five years,
21:28
from now, 10 years from now, who knows.
21:30
But hopefully if you found me in the future and you're going back
21:35
to my catalog, I hope you see. This time capsule of this
21:41
journey that I'm on this journey that I have been on.
21:45
And like I said, though, there have been many Rocky moments may
21:50
be unsure moments of uncertainty of uncertainty that has not all
21:55
been bad likes their best. So many just moments of light
22:01
and hope. And like I said, a big part of
22:04
it is y'all the community friends family, everything
22:08
across the board Because y'all keep me going y'all.
22:13
Keep me sane. You know, when things look dire
22:17
and life and I'm listen to us y'all's podcast and continent
22:20
stuff. And somebody gives me a shout.
22:22
I just like Brian's my day, warms my heart or somebody, you
22:27
know, tweets that mediums me, emails me whatever.
22:32
And it's just like, yo. Glad I found you.
22:37
You do dope stuff. I appreciate you.
22:38
What you're doing. It just means the world to me.
22:42
Oh, and another big thing I do this year was got to freakin
22:45
talk to the damn a college class about everything that I do.
22:50
I'm I'm like, I'm still a noob at this but it's like, I'm guess
22:55
I'm doing something well enough towards him.
22:57
I trust me to impart the knowledge that I have gained so
23:00
far to more people. And yeah, like I said it's just
23:04
very Humbly and looking forward to seeing what we are when.
23:10
Hopefully, because this would be something, I would love to do on
23:14
a yearly basis, fingers crossed, but I would like to kind of look
23:19
back at this, in the future, even a year from now saying,
23:22
okay, where is Robert at the end of 2022 or his representative
23:27
2025 2030, so on and so forth. And yeah, like I said, it's
23:35
especially if it's, if this is in the future that you're
23:39
finding this comment on this video because I would love to
23:43
see like comments, kind of tracking people that might find
23:49
this across time as we as we go on.
23:52
And yeah. And that's pretty much going to
23:58
do it. Like I said, I just didn't want
23:59
to go to too long, but I do want to say once again, thank you for
24:06
listening watching. However, you're consuming this
24:10
and thank you for being here. Thank you for supporting me.
24:19
You try to take me out on multiple occasions but Robert
24:26
Still here. I'm still going strong because I
24:29
have faith in myself. I have people behind me all
24:49
along the way and with that, Or just mainly one for my favorite
25:05
games of all time last of us and it's just simply when you're
25:09
lost in the darkness, look for the lights and that is what I
25:13
will continue to do.