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Should I Keep Giving While I'm Still Drowning in Debt? · Becoming Financially Confident

• 0:37
  Every Sunday, the plate comes around and you feel torn in two.
• 0:41
  You want to give, but you owe so much it almost feels irresponsible.
• 0:47
  So which is it?
• 0:48
  Do you give or get out of debt first?
• 0:51
  This is one of the hardest money questions in the Christian life, and it deserves an honest answer because no matter how you look at it, you feel guilty on both sides.
• 1:02
  But I've got an answer today that's actually more freeing than you'd expect it.
• 1:05
  So stay with me and.
• 1:07
  And let's wrestle this with honesty.
• 1:19
  Hello and welcome to Financially Confident Christian.
• 1:21
  I'm Ralph EsteJr.I'myourguideaswehelp to breakthatcycleoffinancialshameandhelp youto liveinconfidence.And todaywe'vegota difficult thing totalkabout.It'sthatwholeidea ofdoIgiveor doIpayoffmydebt?We gota greatlistenerquestion,andthis listener wants tohonorGod,butsheisburiedin debt.And theproblem,likesomanyof us, shefeelsguiltyeitherway.AndIjustwanttostart bysayingIunderstandattention,andbothsides ofthisarereal.Andifyou'vegotaquestionfortheshow,itdoesn'thavetobequiteasdeep asthisone.I'dlovetohearyourquestion.Youcangetto mebygoing to financiallyconfidentchristian.comwe'llputalinkintheshownotesforthat.Butlet'sgetrightto get to me by going to financiallyconfidentchristian.com/question we'll put tokeep tithingwhen I'mthisdeepindebt?Andhere'swhatshewrites.Shesays,hi,Ralph.ThisissomethingI've
• 2:18
  beenafraidtoaskanyoneatchurch.I'mabout $30,000 indebtbetweencreditcardsandapersonal loan.It'sheavy, and I'mtryinghardtogetout.Buthere'smy struggle.I'vealwaysgiventomychurch.I givethetithe10%offthe top.Butlately Ilookat themoneyleavingmyaccount andIthinkifIpause this evenforayearandputittowardsmy debt,Icouldgetfreesomuchfaster.ThenIimmediatelyfeelguilty,likeI'mrobbingGod orputting moneyabovemy faith.Butthentheothersidehitsme.AmIbeinga poorsteward bygivingmoneyItechnicallyowe tosomeoneelse?
• 2:59
  RalphI gobackandforthandfeelguiltynomatterwhatIlandon.Whatdoesfaithfulnessactuallylooklikehere?ShouldIkeepgiving whileI'mdrowningorfocusonthedebtfirst, thankyoufortakingthisseriously.Absolutely.
• 3:14
  Itakethisseriously.This isaquestionI'veactuallywrestledwithinmyown mind.TherewasaseasoninmylifewhenI hadalotof credit card debt,justlike you.AndIwant totellyourightnowwhatyou'reasking, andthisiswhythisisgoingtobealittleeasiertoday.
• 3:29
  It's notamathquestion.Ifitwasamathquestion,Iwouldsimplytellyou,yes, payoffyourdebtfirst.
• 3:35
  Butit'snotamathquestion.It'saheartquestion.Thefirst thing Iwant totellyouisyoushouldn't have guilt ineither direction.Sotoday,I'mgoingtohelp you builda framework.I'mgoingtoactuallyshowyouhowyou can buildgenerosityandwisdomtogether.
• 3:51
  Butlet'sstart withthis.You've gottoreleasetheguilt on bothsidesofthis.Like yousaid itsoeloquentlyin your question,Ralph,Ifeelguiltyeitherway.I understandthat.That's theHoly Spirit.That's yourdiscernmentspeakingtoyou.Butletme tellyousomething.God doesn'tkeepsomeeternalscorecards.There'snofeartax ifyoudon'tdothis.Wisdomisn'tfaithless.Whatyou'vegotto aim for ispeaceandnotpanic.Think aboutitlikethis.
• 4:20
  And we're going togetalittlebitmoredeepintothisin asecond.ButGodwantsyour heart,notyour guilt.Andtoday'sBibleverseactuallyisgoingto reinforcethat.Butstartthere.Godwantsyourheart.Hewantsyouto bea heartpersonwantingto begenerous.Which leadsmetothesecondthing.
• 4:38
  We'vegottorememberwhywegiveinthefirstplace.AndIheard somebodysay this,andIsaid,thisisperfect.We'renotfundingGod.Goddoesn'tneedourmoney.He'stheonethatgaveittousin thefirstplace.Thereasonthatwegiveis webuildtrustin him.Webuild gratitudeinHim.
• 4:56
  And thebigger issueiswe're loosening our griponsomethingthat's not ours inthefirstplacetoencapsulateit.
• 5:04
  It'sreallyaboutkeepingmoneyoff thethrone.Godprovidesforus.It'snotthe paycheck.
• 5:11
  Andwhathe providesforus isworthprotecting in theend.We don't givebecause God needsit.Wegive becauseourheartneedsit.Andthat'swhat yourquestionisreally talking abouttoday.Butlet'sget a littlebitmore indepth.
• 5:24
  Let's gointothescripture.Let'stalk aboutwherethescriptureisfirmandwhereit'sfreeing.
• 5:30
  Theideaofgenerosity isclearlydelineatedinScripture.That'snotopen fordebate.You'vegottobe cheerful and,and you've gotto be generous.Butatthesametime,itdoesn'thavetobecrushing.Soyou've gotto decidein yourheart,notyourfriend'sheart,notthechurch'sheart, not anybody else'sheart, yourheart.Andifyou'redoingitby compulsion, you'vegottoexamine yourheart.Butthe freedomside of thisisthefreedomis how muchyougive.
• 5:59
  Theprinciple ofgivingisveryfirm.
• 6:01
  Ican'targuethat inscripture.Butthenumberisflexible.As Isaid, generosityisthe command.Theexactnumberiswheregracegivesyouroom.Andthat'swhyIsaidearlieryougottoconsiderbothandnotjusteitheror.
• 6:21
  BecausewhatIheard yousayinginyourquestionis,Ralph,I'vegotthis $30,000mountainofdebt, andI feelyou,thatisheavy.Butthisisoneofthosetypical situations where it'snotan all or nothingdecision.Youcangivemeaninglyandstillattackthedebt, but you'vegot to just haveaheartydiscussionand adjust the amountbetweenyouand God.Intheend,Iwant youtobejoyfulandIalsowant youtoattackthat debt.Andyouactuallycandoboth atonce.
• 6:52
  Like Isaid, thisusuallyisn'tabothandorneitheror issue.Sohowdoyoudoitactually?
• 6:58
  What'sthereal steptothis?You've gotto attackthedebt with realintensity.It'sall abouta sprint.Thisisn'tsomestrolltogetthatdebtpaidoff.Because ifyou continuetostrollthisdebt,andwe'regoing totalkaboutthislaterintheweek,ifyoucontinuetojust strollalong, this debtis goingtoballoonandballoon.Sorightnow you'vereallygottofocusonatightbudget andyou'vegot tothrowthat extra money atat that debt.If thatmeansyougottocutsomethings,ifyougottoearnsomeextramoney,thegoalis togetfreefast, liveinthe shortseason, becauseat somepoint you're goingtohavemorelater.And thatfreedomthatyou're goingtofeelisactually goingtofuelyourgenerosity.
• 7:40
  Becausegettingfreeofdebt isn'ttheopposite ofgenerosity.It'sactuallythefuelforit.Justthinkaboutit.If you didn'thave thatdebt,how muchmoregenerouscouldyou be?Now,Iwanttogoalittledeeperbecauseyousaidyou'vebeenafraidto askevenatChurch.SoI'msupergladyouaskedit here.ThereisnoshameinwrestlinghonestlywithhowtohonorGodandhowtohandle aheavyburdenatthe sametime.Here'swhatyourfaithdoesn't promiseyou.Itdoesn'tpromisethatgivingmakesthedebtdisappear.I'vesummedsomeofthese clownsand talkabout,well, if yougive,yourdebtwillbeexpunged.
• 8:18
  Itdoesn'tworklikethat.Itdoesn'tpromise thatthere'ssomeeasyformulathat settleseverydoubt inyourmind.And it doesn'tpromisethatthetension goes awaycompletely.Buthere's whatfaithdoespromise.TheGodyou'retryingsohardto honor.Andlisten, Ihearit in the tone ofvoice.You'retryingtohonorGod.
• 8:39
  Heseesyour heartandhe seeshowyourheartisclearly benttowardshimbecauseyou'vebeendoingit.Think aboutthewidowwiththetwocoins.That's afamousBiblestory.AndwhatdidJesuspointout?Itwasn't theamount,itwasherheart.
• 8:56
  AndGodseesyou.Heseesthatdebt.Hesees allof it.Andheknowsyourthoughtfulness.Andheknowsthateveninthemidstof thatheavy seasonyou'reinthatyouwanttohonorHim.So myencouragementtodayistogive fromafree heartattack thedebt withdiligent handsand stopcarryingguiltGod never handedyou.Thefactthatyou're agonizingoverthis tellsme one bigthing.
• 9:23
  You'veactually gotabeautifulheart.Sofocusonyourheart.Don'tfocusonthatpercentage.
• 9:30
  Findfreedomandbreakfreeofthatfear.Sohere's yourwinfor today,andit'sactuallyaprettysimplething.I wantyoutotake10 minutesandIjustwant youtopray.Iwantyouto prayaboutwhatfaithfulgivingisinthisseasonforyou.Thisisa conversationbetweenyou andGod.
• 9:48
  Don't worry aboutwhatother people think.Don'tworryaboutwhatthechurchistellingyou.JustpraytoGodandsay,lord,what wouldyouhavemetodo?Andwritedownthat number.
• 9:59
  Writedown thatdebtnumberandjust makeonedecision.Listen,you'renotgoingtosolve that $30,000 debt today,tomorrow,or nextmonth,forthat happens.ButdecidethatbeforeGod.Andstopwaving,becauseonceyoutalkwithhim,he'sgoingtoput yourheartatrest.And thisis allaboutheartanyway.Which leads metotoday'sBibleverse.It comesto us from2nd Corinthians,chapter9,verse7.
• 10:23
  Youmusteachdecideinyour hearthowmuchto give.And don'tgivereluctantly orinresponse topressure.AndIlovethe endingofthis.
• 10:32
  ForGod lovesa personwhogives.Cheerfully,cheerfully.Whatisittellingyou?
• 10:40
  It saysthe decisionisyours.Youdidn'thearitsayyoumustdothis oryou havetodo this.Itsaystogive.
• 10:46
  Yes,butthedecision isyours.
• 10:49
  Andwhenyouembracethat scripture,itfreestheguilt.
• 10:53
  It'sallabouthavingthat cheerfulheart,breaking thatfear.It'sjoy andwisdomworkingtogether.Howaboutwepraytogetherrightnow?HeavenlyFather,Ibringbeforeyousomeonewho lovesyou,Lord, and they wanttohonoryouwiththeirmoneyevenwhilecarrying ahugeheavyburdenofdebt.And Lord,you knowwhat they'vebeenwrestlingwith.Youseethesilence.They'reso afraidofgetting itwrong.Lord, I justwantyoutomeetthemwithpeacetoday,rightintheseasonthey'rein, Lord.Helpthem toclarifythatseasonofgivingandthatseasonofpayingdebt.Lord,Iaskthatyouwouldfreetheguiltonevery sideofthis, strengthen themintheirattackingthatdebt.
• 11:34
  Becauseyouseetheirheart,Lord,andIknowyouwantittobe cheerfulandwiseatthesame time.Sobreakthatcycle ofshameforthem,Lord.Speaktotheirheart.AndweaskthisinJesusname.Amen.Friend,whenyoucameintotoday'sshow,youweretorn.But I've givenyoua path tofreedomout ofthis.Giving andgettingfree wereneverenemies.Sohere'sthetakeaway.Numberonething,release thatguilt.Remember,it'sahardissue.It'snotaboutfear.
• 12:03
  It'snotsome eternalscorecard.Reinforcethatbeliefin whywegive.Itguards theheartaboutthatwhich we makethethroneofourlives.
• 12:13
  Gobacktoscripture.It'sacommand.Yes,wehavetogive,buthe alsogivesusgrace.Sodobothtoday,liveinthatshortseasonthat's goingto fuelthatgivingforthefuture.
• 12:23
  Onceyoufind freedom.Now,maybeyou're strugglingwith somethingjustlikethis.Iwouldloveto helpyouoneon one.Whydon'tyousendmea voicemailmessage?It'srealeasytodoit.
• 12:33
  Justgo tofinanciallyconfidentchristian.com voicemailwe'llputalinkrightintheshownotes.Youjustclick onthelink.Recordyourvoiceagain.That'sfinanciallyconfidentchristian.comvoicemailI justwanttothank youso much forjoiningmetoday.I wanttoencourageyou,asalways,stayfinanciallysavvy.
• 12:53
  MayGod bless youand youhavea trulygreatday.//