Latest / Kinkyboys Podcast / 92: Fisting

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92: Fisting · Kinkyboys Podcast

• 0:39
  None: Enter Tex..
• 0:48
  Craig: So, yes, that was Fist Me This Christmas by The Wet Spots.
• 0:53
  Craig: Now, if anyone's listening to this not around December time,
• 0:56
  Craig: that's going to completely ruin it. but we are recording for December's episode
• 1:01
  Craig: an episode about fisting.
• 1:04
  Craig: And before we get wrist deep into that topic I must of course thank our Daddy's
• 1:09
  Craig: Favourite Level Patrons.
• 1:10
  Craig: So thank you to TimeToTinker SlimLeather AdamNYC SouthernSouter OchNurb BanjoStewy
• 1:21
  Craig: ForeverBulking BrianC and HairyHypnotist.
• 1:25
  Craig: Thank you. you are daddy's favorites so yeah on with the show today we have
• 1:34
  Craig: joe with me to talk us through fisting joe tell us a bit about yourself.
• 1:38
  Joe: Hello joe uh pronouns are he him um i am a boy sometimes a daddy special boys
• 1:44
  Joe: seem to bring that side out of me which who knew that was in there um i like
• 1:48
  Joe: fisting so isn't it a great idea that i'm on the show for a fisting topic wonderful um but multi
• 1:54
  Joe: -faceted kinkster um i've within reason let's say within reason i've tried most
• 1:59
  Joe: things and i have a a long list a long a long a long catalog if you will and
• 2:05
  Joe: a big catalog of things and activities to try but fisting is is a big one for
• 2:10
  Joe: me because i very much enjoy it.
• 2:14
  Craig: Brilliant um so yeah how long have you sort of been active in the scene.
• 2:20
  Joe: Oh so i hate that question so yeah so like
• 2:23
  Joe: i i'm very so okay i'm
• 2:27
  Joe: doing hand gestures so everyone on patreon who can probably see this
• 2:29
  Joe: recording um will see them but everyone else i apologize but
• 2:32
  Joe: um yeah i i'm not i'm not massively seen like
• 2:36
  Joe: for the last for most of my most of my gay life i very
• 2:39
  Joe: much was like king confetti sort of in
• 2:42
  Joe: the bedroom slash dungeons if a daddy happened to
• 2:45
  Joe: have one um but like the last the last
• 2:47
  Joe: kind of few years i've been a bit more active on the scene as in i
• 2:51
  Joe: help run the lever social in birmingham um kind of
• 2:54
  Joe: getting involved like going to birmingham fetishmen things like that in
• 2:57
  Joe: birmingham which where i live um but yeah
• 3:00
  Joe: it's the scene the scene pre pre moving up up to the midlands uh i was very
• 3:06
  Joe: much just i stay at home and do horrible things to myself and others um and
• 3:10
  Joe: of course twitter tumblr x etc all the various places to post smart so um yeah
• 3:17
  Joe: that's pretty much it for me wonderful.
• 3:21
  Craig: Yeah so we should always start with the basics.
• 3:25
  Joe: Yes um.
• 3:26
  Craig: For people who have never heard about it before shall we go into what exactly is fisting.
• 3:31
  Joe: Okay yeah fisting basic definition very
• 3:34
  Joe: clinical putting a hand into an anal or vaginal
• 3:37
  Joe: canal sexy um but
• 3:41
  Joe: yeah fisting is is not um sometimes it's
• 3:44
  Joe: a fist a closed fist um but it's a
• 3:46
  Joe: bit of a misnomer in that you don't start with a fist um a
• 3:49
  Joe: lot of the time it's your fingers up to a beak so the
• 3:53
  Joe: little hand closed hand gesture
• 3:56
  Joe: um punch fisting so fisting with a
• 3:59
  Joe: closed fist is a thing definitely not something that you
• 4:01
  Joe: start with unless you're extremely skilled um but
• 4:05
  Joe: yeah um fisting just a fist in and out it can go to elbow if you're very skilled
• 4:10
  Joe: i have seen some um both amazing and also mind-boggling videos of shoulder shoulder
• 4:16
  Joe: deep and i'm just like i have a good understanding of anatomy and even i'm going
• 4:21
  Joe: like where where does that go like yeah.
• 4:23
  Craig: Where's it all getting fitted.
• 4:24
  Joe: How bendy is that arm that can get around those corners but um but yeah that
• 4:28
  Joe: that's fisting in a nutshell.
• 4:31
  Craig: Yeah that's very concise.
• 4:33
  Joe: And yeah.
• 4:34
  Craig: As you said it uh one thing about it which i'm learning is it takes essentially
• 4:41
  Craig: it can take a lot of time and training and a big part of the process of,
• 4:47
  Craig: training yourself to take a fist is what a lot of people like about it it's
• 4:52
  Craig: like it's not something you can just sit down and do it's something that takes
• 4:55
  Craig: time and dedication and practice and learning about your body in some very interesting ways.
• 5:01
  Joe: Oh yes yeah yeah it's like,
• 5:06
  Joe: and you say you say take time like there there have been a couple of people
• 5:09
  Joe: i know that just seem to magically like oh yeah i started fisting last weekend
• 5:13
  Joe: and i'm like oh have you done if you had lots of like practice of toys oh no
• 5:17
  Joe: i'm like how how have who are you what sort of creature are you that you can
• 5:21
  Joe: just stretch like that magically yeah that.
• 5:26
  Craig: That is insane when people can do that absolute witchcraft absolute witchcraft but um.
• 5:31
  Joe: Yeah i should also say like this these are my experiences and my knowledge.
• 5:35
  Craig: Like i'm.
• 5:35
  Joe: Not an expert anyone that says they're an expert in x kink run run away if they
• 5:41
  Joe: say i'm very experienced but you know that's fine expert red flag.
• 5:46
  Craig: Yeah yeah it's like there are no sort of official bodies to give out these sorts
• 5:53
  Craig: of certifications it's like so who defines an expert we.
• 5:58
  Joe: Should we totally should we should make a fisting a fisting organization i don't
• 6:02
  Joe: know what to be called fist hq uh.
• 6:04
  Craig: Maybe something.
• 6:05
  Joe: More punny punnies.
• 6:06
  Craig: Pun organizations the best it's ah
• 6:09
  Craig: you just remind me of a um conversation i
• 6:12
  Craig: was having with some people the other night uh so obviously there's the international
• 6:17
  Craig: organize or is it iso international standards organization and they basically
• 6:25
  Craig: this they're this regulatory body that makes uh standardization for everything,
• 6:32
  Craig: uh like they even have like how to make the standard cup of tea okay.
• 6:37
  Joe: We should we should we should contact them.
• 6:39
  Craig: Yes i was doing about um flagging
• 6:42
  Craig: colors oh cute because so turns
• 6:46
  Craig: out there's this big divide as to um
• 6:49
  Craig: musk and piercing oh half the resources i find have musk as magenta and piercing
• 6:58
  Craig: as purple and the other half has it flipped over so musk is purple and magenta is piercing yeah.
• 7:06
  Joe: We need to we can organize that.
• 7:07
  Craig: Yeah that's that's the.
• 7:09
  Joe: Gay that's the gay agenda organization.
• 7:10
  Craig: Yes um.
• 7:11
  Joe: Another type of fisting into iso because i'm now very.
• 7:14
  Craig: You've now.
• 7:15
  Joe: Triggered although it's coming up with um fishing rather than fisting it's like.
• 7:19
  Craig: No i did not mean fishing no i doubt there'll be anything like to be classed
• 7:26
  Craig: as fisting you must have at least five digits uh past the knuckle um.
• 7:30
  Joe: Like stumping stumping versus.
• 7:33
  Craig: Fisting yes intersection all the.
• 7:37
  Joe: Same all the same all the same umbrella terms but um.
• 7:39
  Craig: Yeah yeah because i mean for my part i've been sort of getting into it as like
• 7:46
  Craig: i have not yet taken a fist um i actually started off with real issues with just any sort of anal sex,
• 7:55
  Craig: i found it uncomfortable i am naturally insanely tight
• 7:59
  Craig: um there's mental stuff mental
• 8:02
  Craig: blocks around it as well um so to
• 8:05
  Craig: help me out my friend who's a lot more experienced than this got me uh two butt
• 8:12
  Craig: plugs which were the top toys gatekeepers they're very good yes yes like this
• 8:20
  Craig: is not a sponsored plug if top toys.
• 8:23
  Joe: Wants to sponsor me though i definitely don't have a whole drawer full and i need more.
• 8:27
  Craig: Space and more toys so yeah if.
• 8:29
  Joe: You're listening top toys help help her help a sister out she needs more toys always.
• 8:33
  Craig: But yeah and
• 8:37
  Craig: it was just the 45 and 55 and he said just like try and take them as much as
• 8:42
  Craig: you can and get up to them and then progress to the 55 and then once done that
• 8:48
  Craig: he also for christmas gifted me um the next two sets up.
• 8:54
  Joe: That's a great christmas gift.
• 8:55
  Craig: Yeah yeah and it's like i wasn't planning on going this big but like you know me as a gift no one plans.
• 9:03
  Joe: To get into fisting it's a sneaky it's a sneaky little thing that happens.
• 9:06
  Craig: Yeah and it is and it got to this point where it's like,
• 9:09
  Craig: oh, I can take this. And the sensations are getting more interesting the bigger
• 9:13
  Craig: I go. Where can this lead?
• 9:16
  Joe: Slippery slope. Slippery slope, elbow doobie, no time.
• 9:19
  Craig: Yep. So how about you? Where did you start with this?
• 9:23
  Joe: So I'm a big old bottom. I tried chopping as a youngster. It was not for me.
• 9:28
  Joe: Actually, don't really like the genitals that much. I'm very much all about the butt.
• 9:33
  Joe: But yeah, I bottomed for like a long time. um
• 9:36
  Joe: and uh in my younger days i would definitely describe myself as a size queen
• 9:42
  Joe: not a shame to admit very you know a lot of not to get too deep but a lot of
• 9:46
  Joe: these issues and in the sort of gay scene about size and like what is perfect
• 9:51
  Joe: what is the best but yeah um taking bigger dicks um,
• 9:56
  Joe: kind of using toys because lonely boy
• 9:59
  Joe: at home needs needs stretch um and just
• 10:02
  Joe: kind of like a natural progression of like oh i better
• 10:05
  Joe: get a bigger toy or i better get a bigger one of the you know
• 10:08
  Joe: that kind of bigger is better mentality
• 10:11
  Joe: and i remember like i bought um eyes bigger
• 10:14
  Joe: than my hole i bought this toy when i was like
• 10:17
  Joe: 1920 went to expectations in london
• 10:20
  Joe: rest in peace with us um i bought this
• 10:23
  Joe: gigantic toy um don't know
• 10:26
  Joe: what my brain was thinking like genuinely i'm like how i
• 10:28
  Joe: thought i could take that i can't um couldn't take it
• 10:31
  Joe: but i was like it was sat there in my cupboard and i'm like
• 10:34
  Joe: i will get to that size and then forgot about it
• 10:37
  Joe: like in a pile of crap and other fetish things in the
• 10:39
  Joe: bottom of the drawer came back to it like a decade later i mean oh this is easy
• 10:42
  Joe: like but it's that kind of progression um again slippery slope you start you
• 10:47
  Joe: start increasing those increments um and you know this feels nice oh this stretch
• 10:52
  Joe: feels nicer and I can't even remember the first time I took a fear stick. It was so long ago.
• 10:58
  Joe: It just kind of happened, I think.
• 11:02
  Joe: Tops tops that like boys that can take a lot it kind of comes hand in hand no pun intended,
• 11:08
  Joe: um and yeah um i i
• 11:11
  Joe: really like to rack my brains i can i can picture him kind
• 11:14
  Joe: of pushing a bit more and more and he knew what he was doing like i was just
• 11:19
  Joe: you know writhing on a bed enjoying myself and then pop fist goes in and yeah
• 11:26
  Joe: that was that was the end that was the end for me fisting bottom um unlocked yeah.
• 11:32
  Craig: And like i mean the sensation is
• 11:35
  Craig: a big part of it like talking
• 11:38
  Craig: about the stretch it's like so again talking about my own experiences when i
• 11:44
  Craig: first started stretching was unpleasant and like when you're pushing yourself
• 11:49
  Craig: to a new size it often does feel unpleasant and then there's this weird moment
• 11:54
  Craig: where your brain switches and it's like the stretching,
• 11:59
  Craig: is the fun part.
• 12:01
  Joe: Yeah where.
• 12:02
  Craig: You feel your body being pushed at that limit.
• 12:06
  Joe: Yeah there's um there was a daddy i used to see when i was in london who i can
• 12:13
  Joe: vividly remember him describing because i was insanely jealous because he he
• 12:17
  Joe: would just open up instantly this is quite early on for me He opened up instantly and just wanted more,
• 12:23
  Joe: like constantly just was like, keep going,
• 12:25
  Joe: keep punching, keep going in.
• 12:28
  Joe: I remember him saying like, it's like a hunger, like it's a genuine kind of
• 12:33
  Joe: something clicks in your brain.
• 12:36
  Joe: And you're just like everything give me everything you
• 12:39
  Joe: have um and i remember with him
• 12:42
  Joe: like a few a few sessions like down the road
• 12:45
  Joe: um it just clicked and i was like i get
• 12:48
  Joe: it like i enjoy obviously i enjoy anal sex before that i enjoy
• 12:51
  Joe: toys and yeah and that stretch but that
• 12:53
  Joe: that there's that like pleasant like i'm enjoying the
• 12:56
  Joe: stretch i'm enjoying that sensation and then there's that like switch
• 13:00
  Joe: into i'm a hungry bottom i i
• 13:03
  Joe: must devour everything kind of moment and i I was like okay love
• 13:06
  Joe: this so um it's very much that it's that's that intense intense stretch intense
• 13:12
  Joe: kind of sensation also the intimacy like you got someone's hand inside you like
• 13:16
  Joe: it's it's quite it is you're physically quite close with another person um but
• 13:23
  Joe: yeah it's that it's that kind of thing as well which is pretty hot.
• 13:26
  Craig: Yeah like I mean we we should talk about it from topping perspective as well
• 13:31
  Craig: like so i first fisted someone when i was uh 19.
• 13:39
  Joe: Same yeah was it you no wasn't you no no.
• 13:43
  Craig: Um so it was a
• 13:46
  Craig: friend i was very close with and he's he he has
• 13:49
  Craig: always been a very talented bottom um and
• 13:53
  Craig: so i remember going in and like on your hand there's this intense pressure but
• 13:59
  Craig: also heat like the inside of the human body is really hot and you feel it and
• 14:05
  Craig: it's like this velvet pressure on your hand and i was just looking at his facial expressions,
• 14:11
  Craig: and there was this like it's very hard to articulate this sort of big sort of
• 14:17
  Craig: connection of i was feeling the inside of his body reacting and seeing his face
• 14:22
  Craig: and it felt very intimate with.
• 14:25
  Joe: How um.
• 14:30
  Craig: Again how to.
• 14:31
  Joe: Articulate no i know exactly what you're getting at connection yeah
• 14:34
  Joe: yeah um and it is that is like
• 14:38
  Joe: normal sex vanilla sex whatever you
• 14:41
  Joe: want to call it no it's it's fun there is a
• 14:43
  Joe: level of connection but it's like you physically have a
• 14:47
  Joe: not just a dick but you you have something more sizable
• 14:50
  Joe: inside someone like the there's obviously a level of control at the
• 14:53
  Joe: top um but it is that like the sensations
• 14:56
  Joe: around your arm and i i remember i um i think
• 14:59
  Joe: it was a one-night stand i went over to this this guy's house
• 15:02
  Joe: did not know did not know he was a fisting bottom at
• 15:06
  Joe: all um it was meant to
• 15:08
  Joe: be like a very verse kind of switch session and um
• 15:12
  Joe: yeah just fell in this is
• 15:15
  Joe: the only way to describe it i was so overwhelmed like he
• 15:18
  Joe: was like keep going keep going and i'm just like like up to my forearm going like
• 15:21
  Joe: i don't know what's going on i don't know what like this is weird
• 15:24
  Joe: like it's kind of hot like very overwhelmed kind
• 15:27
  Joe: of got to the elbow and then i was like uh no no no this is uh this is too much
• 15:32
  Joe: like very overwhelmed youngster um but it is that it's now like being able to
• 15:39
  Joe: give knowing i'm giving someone that much pleasure in that specific way which
• 15:42
  Joe: i know what it feels like as well so i can sort of know what they're feeling,
• 15:46
  Joe: um and kind of just makes me smile just like i i can kind of give them that
• 15:51
  Joe: level of pleasure of eye experience so topping is fun as well oh yeah.
• 15:58
  Craig: Yeah and it's so fun because again like that was i was 19 when i had my first
• 16:06
  Craig: experience like you like how long was it before you tried it again.
• 16:10
  Joe: So as a top so i when i
• 16:13
  Joe: was a lot younger um i was very um binary
• 16:17
  Joe: binary stereotypes like bottom submissive i
• 16:21
  Joe: don't top i'm just a bottom that's that's
• 16:24
  Joe: that's the cookie cutter kind of position that bottom
• 16:27
  Joe: means this um so as a as
• 16:30
  Joe: a top um like a good hang
• 16:33
  Joe: on that was like 19 so probably like 24 25
• 16:36
  Joe: where i i still was actively getting
• 16:39
  Joe: into fisting and then the thing that many
• 16:42
  Joe: fisters find there are very few pure tops
• 16:45
  Joe: um everyone everyone wants to have a have a
• 16:48
  Joe: go as well which is good that's that's what it should but you get a break you
• 16:51
  Joe: get to give someone else some fun um so i kind of uh
• 16:55
  Joe: frustrated very very naive joe kind
• 16:57
  Joe: of going like where are all the tops um i'll find someone that's
• 17:00
  Joe: verse and then kind of exploring the sort of
• 17:03
  Joe: top side and the more the sort of not necessarily dominant but the top kind
• 17:06
  Joe: of side of fisting um and then going okay yeah i love this like why did i why
• 17:11
  Joe: did i try and find um magical pure tops that are hard to find sometimes and
• 17:16
  Joe: not just go there are all these lovely verse fisters that we just want to give
• 17:20
  Joe: each other a hand and other things exactly.
• 17:22
  Craig: And have a great understanding of how it feels on the other.
• 17:25
  Joe: End so they have better yeah but yeah i think i think it was a good a good like
• 17:29
  Joe: six six issues later um yeah don't look back now it's nice i love fisting people
• 17:35
  Joe: it's good fun nice tagline i love fisting people it's good fun it is it is and,
• 17:44
  Joe: yeah it's.
• 17:47
  Craig: One of the things I find most interesting about it, so you and I,
• 17:50
  Craig: we both go to the gym a lot.
• 17:52
  Joe: Yeah.
• 17:53
  Craig: There is a very similar sort of sensation and hook for progression with fisting
• 18:00
  Craig: as there is with weightlifting.
• 18:03
  Craig: And it makes a lot of sense because essentially you are training a set of muscles.
• 18:08
  Joe: Oh, yes. And this is where, so this is, again, not sponsored video. I have various brands.
• 18:14
  Joe: Top Toys is genius for this. the the
• 18:17
  Joe: naming conventions of size and going i
• 18:20
  Joe: took 93 i could i you know i can
• 18:23
  Joe: take therefore this size um oh i'm now
• 18:26
  Joe: moving up to the x like it's that kind of you
• 18:29
  Joe: know what numbers and as well like i love the fact that
• 18:32
  Joe: you can plan because that's that's that's something i've
• 18:35
  Joe: talked to friends who are kind of wanting to get into fisting like like
• 18:38
  Joe: what size toy like how should you jump
• 18:41
  Joe: and think um things where like there's like john
• 18:44
  Joe: thomas toy stuff like that where you can buy like a massive range of
• 18:47
  Joe: sizes of exactly the same toy so you get used
• 18:49
  Joe: to a size and then you buy the next size expensive yes
• 18:53
  Joe: um trading toys for friends who may be at
• 18:55
  Joe: different stages always a great idea clean your toys yes but
• 18:59
  Joe: sanitize your toys that but like that kind of like i
• 19:02
  Joe: no longer need this kind of batch of toys because i have outgrown them um passing
• 19:06
  Joe: on to friends but that kind of sort of gradual increase in size that you get
• 19:12
  Joe: used to it and then you go very gym adjacent different different kind of workout
• 19:18
  Joe: but uh a very fun very fun workout just.
• 19:21
  Craig: To clarify for the names because people probably won't know this so when we
• 19:25
  Craig: talk about the 95 and 93 um so top toys name them after the.
• 19:32
  Joe: Circumference circumference i.
• 19:35
  Craig: Always get mixed up which one's the three and which one's around.
• 19:37
  Joe: Yeah circumference.
• 19:38
  Craig: So the 45 is 4.5 inches 55 is 5.5 inches and you go on so far.
• 19:46
  Craig: The 93 annoys me because.
• 19:50
  Joe: My brain.
• 19:50
  Craig: Because in my autistic brain it breaks the.
• 19:53
  Joe: Pattern i i completely i completely
• 19:56
  Joe: get you um when so i'm i'm looking at
• 19:59
  Joe: the and i'm now going to look it up because i forgot exactly the size i have
• 20:02
  Joe: a um a very nerdy list of all the toys and sizes
• 20:05
  Joe: i have but um oh it's
• 20:08
  Joe: like it goes from like 106 or
• 20:12
  Joe: 108 to 116 and i'm just like please make an intermediate toy like that's such
• 20:18
  Joe: a like at that size as well it's such a big jump like i made the jump but it
• 20:24
  Joe: was very intense to get there um yeah it should it would be lovely if it was just,
• 20:30
  Joe: fives or tens or another another unit that's just consistent but they're like
• 20:36
  Joe: no let's change it let's just we should we should write to them and ask them to explain.
• 20:44
  Craig: But yeah and i think like talking
• 20:47
  Craig: about gym progress and why it's like the gym this is a good way to
• 20:50
  Craig: get into the sort of biological mechanics of it so your sphincter is essentially
• 20:57
  Craig: a ring of muscles and um actually you know what's better than weightlifting
• 21:04
  Craig: yoga fisting is yoga for your sphincter.
• 21:10
  Craig: Because people see like these really advanced yoga practitioners who can bend
• 21:16
  Craig: their bodies in insane ways.
• 21:19
  Craig: This is because over the time, they've more and more put focus and training
• 21:23
  Craig: into extending and stretching out that muscle whilst keeping tension in it.
• 21:28
  Craig: So they can essentially bend their muscles to a much larger degree than most people can.
• 21:34
  Craig: It's the same thing for your sphincter when you're fisting essentially
• 21:38
  Craig: you are training your sphincter to essentially stretch and tense um as you go
• 21:46
  Craig: and one of the big things that did help with my initial problems with bottoming
• 21:51
  Craig: was doing a few yoga classes learning how to connect breath with muscle muscle relaxation.
• 21:57
  Joe: Because.
• 21:58
  Craig: Once you learn to do that for one part of your body you can apply it to every other.
• 22:02
  Joe: Yeah it's it's knowing it's knowing
• 22:05
  Joe: what feels well what your body feels like kind of
• 22:08
  Joe: um there's a thing like anyone that's interfisting
• 22:11
  Joe: or wants to get into who's gonna do loads of research that you
• 22:14
  Joe: will regularly see a line about um uh
• 22:18
  Joe: consciously relaxing your in your inner like your inner
• 22:21
  Joe: sphincter like there's you'll find it constantly talks about
• 22:24
  Joe: consciously relaxing it um and
• 22:27
  Joe: it's hard to do like it but it is it is that case of like i
• 22:31
  Joe: know that i can relax um i can go for that mental
• 22:33
  Joe: hurdle we can get onto that in a sec about like fisting for
• 22:37
  Joe: bottoms what to do but um there's that sort of understanding
• 22:41
  Joe: of your own body understanding of sensations getting used to those
• 22:44
  Joe: sensations and and kind of going like i know i can do this like i should just
• 22:48
  Joe: relax like i can i can relax into this and once i get to that point i know it's
• 22:52
  Joe: going to be a lot more fun and less kind of tense um but yeah yoga is good and
• 22:57
  Joe: it is a good is a good sort of analogy i guess for for fisting yeah.
• 23:03
  Craig: And and again so it's like every time you push yourself up to the next size
• 23:09
  Craig: like we've been talking about incremental training,
• 23:11
  Craig: the first time you push yourself will be quite tough and you know you do have
• 23:17
  Craig: to be careful not to injure yourself
• 23:18
  Craig: but is that gently but consistently pushing yourself to take bigger,
• 23:24
  Craig: and your body if you do that like frequently your body will go okay i now have
• 23:31
  Craig: to learn how to take this size the muscles will develop and heal in a way to
• 23:35
  Craig: take this size better in the future.
• 23:40
  Joe: Cool well we will that nicely brings us
• 23:43
  Joe: on to to bottoming as in um what
• 23:46
  Joe: to know how should i start what can i do kind
• 23:49
  Joe: of what are the questions bottoms or yeah would be
• 23:52
  Joe: fisting bottoms would ask um and i
• 23:55
  Joe: think the main one and i mean i've i've googled this preparation douching
• 24:00
  Joe: eating diets um like there
• 24:04
  Joe: is no the truth the truth is there is no perfect way like
• 24:08
  Joe: it just doesn't exist like you if you if you google like how
• 24:10
  Joe: to prep for visiting there'll be like a million and one ways people
• 24:13
  Joe: will swear by like i eat sweet corn the day before so i
• 24:16
  Joe: can see where it is you know tmi moment by
• 24:19
  Joe: the way it's like trigger warning poop you know
• 24:22
  Joe: those sort of things um they're like
• 24:25
  Joe: people will be like i use like um tracker foods or tracer foods so
• 24:28
  Joe: when i'm cleaning out i can see exactly where i
• 24:31
  Joe: am some people swear by um shower shots some
• 24:34
  Joe: people will say um no it's too much water it's too
• 24:37
  Joe: high pressure like you find what's best for you like
• 24:39
  Joe: i use a shower shot um because i find it a lot more convenient and
• 24:43
  Joe: easier than having to fill up a bulb douche constantly um i
• 24:46
  Joe: know what foods trigger me i know i kind of know what
• 24:49
  Joe: not to eat if i'm planning a session um sometimes it
• 24:52
  Joe: makes no sense like genuinely like there are people that
• 24:55
  Joe: i know that are like for two days before they will
• 24:58
  Joe: reduce the amount they eat um they'll start having more
• 25:01
  Joe: fruits and sort of fibers more drink it's kind
• 25:04
  Joe: of like liquid yeah meals rather than full
• 25:07
  Joe: meals because you know if there's less in you if there's less kind of substantial stuff.
• 25:10
  Joe: Less to clean out the other end um i'm just.
• 25:13
  Joe: Like i can't like i i lose so much energy that
• 25:16
  Joe: when i actually get to it i'm so tired and slightly irritable that
• 25:19
  Joe: i've not eaten that i can't relax so you find you find like i know people like
• 25:23
  Joe: that that works for them doesn't work for me um you just find what works you
• 25:27
  Joe: find what you find every now and again you know you pray to the douche gods
• 25:30
  Joe: you kind of get in get in the shower get the bathtub wherever you wherever you
• 25:33
  Joe: prepare um and you kind of go please work like please please go efficiently um.
• 25:40
  Joe: But yeah unfortunately no magic way of doing it you just
• 25:43
  Joe: have to find what works um and there's
• 25:45
  Joe: a thing like giving yourself time relaxing
• 25:49
  Joe: like there's nothing worse than and i've
• 25:52
  Joe: done this before i think i think every bottom has done that like oh i've got
• 25:55
  Joe: a guy coming over in like two hours i have to rush to
• 25:58
  Joe: to get ready and you like speed douche and then
• 26:00
  Joe: you piss your insides off um and then
• 26:04
  Joe: you've over douched and then you know everything feels uncomfortable
• 26:07
  Joe: when you're stressing because he's going to be here in half an hour and it's like
• 26:10
  Joe: give yourself time relax put on some nice music like i didn't think about this
• 26:14
  Joe: for ages like i just you know go into the bathroom very very clinical like let's
• 26:19
  Joe: go but like actually put on music have a make it a nice thing it's not it's
• 26:23
  Joe: not the best but like make it a relaxing enjoyable experience.
• 26:27
  Craig: Like i use it as a time to catch up on my podcast list and.
• 26:33
  Joe: Yeah so we.
• 26:34
  Craig: Should say like over douching is So, anatomy, you have essentially the initial
• 26:41
  Craig: chamber, which is the rectum, where when you need to take a shit,
• 26:44
  Craig: that is where shit is stored.
• 26:47
  Craig: Most douching, especially just for anal sex, you only really want to clean out that section.
• 26:53
  Craig: Um and if you over douche you essentially go over a bend and it starts to clean
• 26:57
  Craig: out the next section which takes time.
• 26:59
  Joe: Yeah obviously.
• 27:00
  Craig: As you get into fisting you will go deeper and you will need to do a deeper
• 27:05
  Craig: clean which is something i don't actually have a lot of experience with personally.
• 27:10
  Joe: Yeah it's it's an it's an art like genuinely
• 27:13
  Joe: like there are days sort of where i'm i'm prepping
• 27:16
  Joe: and it works beautifully and i'm just like i have no
• 27:19
  Joe: idea who i like which god which deity
• 27:22
  Joe: has blessed me on this day but like the magic like
• 27:25
  Joe: douche that 20 minutes and done and that's like a deep
• 27:28
  Joe: douche as well and i'm just like i need to start recording what
• 27:31
  Joe: i'm eating because i need to find out what what chain of events
• 27:33
  Joe: led to this perfect day um but yeah there's a
• 27:37
  Joe: really great um i can picture in my head there's a really great
• 27:39
  Joe: cartoon um there's this little berry guy and
• 27:42
  Joe: it's um it's split into two halves there's the quick douche so
• 27:46
  Joe: base canel sex um just clearing out the rectum and
• 27:49
  Joe: then there's the there's the long one which then goes on to a second page and
• 27:52
  Joe: it's very silly little cartoon informatic um him
• 27:55
  Joe: singing let it go like at the end to clear
• 27:59
  Joe: out um but it's it's true like it kind
• 28:02
  Joe: of it talks about like getting into different positions like
• 28:04
  Joe: taking breaks when you're deep douching going to lie down
• 28:07
  Joe: on the bed going on your side like massaging your abdomen like
• 28:11
  Joe: things that kind of help help you relax all those
• 28:14
  Joe: muscles and help push kind of things along to get them out um but.
• 28:18
  Joe: There's there's lots there's lots of things on the internet in terms of
• 28:20
  Joe: like i use this position this works for me like i
• 28:23
  Joe: i roll around the floor and that kind of helps move any water like i leave it
• 28:28
  Joe: 10 minutes and then you know go and try and go to the toilet to see if any there
• 28:32
  Joe: was any water trapped somewhere um i know people who weigh themselves which
• 28:37
  Joe: actually is genius i weigh i weigh myself before i before i start i'm x amount.
• 28:43
  Joe: Therefore if i'm at that amount still it means i'm full of water and i i need
• 28:48
  Joe: to relax like There are people that do that level of...
• 28:51
  Joe: Wow kind of which again you do what you do that works you do what you do that
• 28:55
  Joe: you're comfortable with um it's a bit grim at times but these are the these
• 29:00
  Joe: are the things we have to do to go deeper yeah.
• 29:03
  Craig: And it's like again everybody's body is different your insides are arranged
• 29:08
  Craig: different how your digestive system process foods is different uh for me the
• 29:13
  Craig: big thing is trying to avoid greasy foods two days before.
• 29:16
  Joe: Oh yes like.
• 29:18
  Craig: Anything with a lot of grease or fat tends to not come out.
• 29:23
  Joe: Cleanly uh.
• 29:24
  Craig: Whereas fiber obviously fiber
• 29:26
  Craig: and protein together helps pack everything into a nice singular package.
• 29:30
  Joe: Yes shall we say speaking of fiber so psyllium
• 29:33
  Joe: husks fiber pills um they are
• 29:36
  Joe: the wonder wonderful thing that every every fisting
• 29:39
  Joe: bottom i think uses um fiber fiber
• 29:42
  Joe: pills or some sort of fiber supplement um drink them with plenty
• 29:45
  Joe: of water uh important health alert don't
• 29:49
  Joe: have it at the same time as any medication um so
• 29:53
  Joe: i know i know bottoms that are like oh in the morning i have my fiber you know
• 29:56
  Joe: i get up in the morning have breakfast have my pills have my fiber supplements
• 29:58
  Joe: do not do this so um the way the way the kind of fiber supplements work essentially
• 30:04
  Joe: it makes a big ball like it you know takes all the water in it expands it makes
• 30:08
  Joe: it easier to come out if you've taken medication at the same time medication can,
• 30:13
  Joe: get trapped in it and then you don't absorb it as well or at
• 30:15
  Joe: all so um people that are on prep for
• 30:18
  Joe: example like usually i know i know many bottoms whose
• 30:21
  Joe: morning routine is essentially you know
• 30:24
  Joe: get up breakfast prep uh fiber supplements
• 30:27
  Joe: and they go on their way and i'm like please don't do this fiber
• 30:31
  Joe: supplements far as far away from any medication as you can if you want them
• 30:34
  Joe: to work it might it's not to say they won't work it just means there's a high
• 30:38
  Joe: isn't a higher chance yeah that it will be blocked and absorbed but um fiber
• 30:43
  Joe: supplements are a big thing um staying hydrated generally um a daddy of mine
• 30:48
  Joe: uh hydrated colon is a happy colon,
• 30:51
  Joe: little little mantra that he always says to me when i'm when i'm kind of prepping um.
• 30:56
  Joe: But yeah fiber supplements are great um i'm just
• 30:59
  Joe: looking at my little notes because i did take notes before this um it's
• 31:03
  Joe: less away from the preparation side of things um but
• 31:06
  Joe: bottoming in general scene negotiation and that goes with
• 31:09
  Joe: like that goes with all kink to be honest um like
• 31:13
  Joe: if if you if anyone's like watching fisting
• 31:16
  Joe: videos like fisting porn you've got those like
• 31:18
  Joe: really intense like really dominant just guys
• 31:21
  Joe: just going at it like that's not really a reality for
• 31:24
  Joe: a lot of people like fisting can be really intimate like if
• 31:27
  Joe: it's like depending on
• 31:30
  Joe: the day you might just want a daddy to come in and absolutely abuse
• 31:33
  Joe: you and you sort of you're up front with your partner like oh i'm
• 31:36
  Joe: looking for this sort of scene or i'm feeling a bit delicate today i
• 31:38
  Joe: want a more intimate kind of romantic scene and
• 31:43
  Joe: it's the same for all kink but it's kind of finding what works
• 31:46
  Joe: for you to get you into that headspace to get you
• 31:48
  Joe: into that kind of um my my favorite open up
• 31:51
  Joe: for daddy open up for daddy headspace um it's
• 31:55
  Joe: like it's finding what's going to work for you so don't just
• 31:58
  Joe: kind of look at porn and go oh yeah
• 32:01
  Joe: they just kind of get into it and that's it you know find find the thing that
• 32:06
  Joe: makes you want to want to have fun negotiate with your partner about what you're
• 32:11
  Joe: looking for and go from there and find the right partner like it's this is not
• 32:15
  Joe: like this isn't this isn't beginner this is this is more this is extreme sports of sex.
• 32:20
  Joe: Like it's can't say that enough like this isn't something that you can just
• 32:23
  Joe: go yeah I'll just I'll just do it tomorrow yeah I'll just I'll just start yeah
• 32:26
  Joe: like it's a lot of a lot of commitment there are probably people laughing at
• 32:30
  Joe: me for saying that but it is like you you train you train a lot for it.
• 32:34
  Joe: There are lots of risks involved which we can get onto in a bit but um but yeah
• 32:38
  Joe: find a good partner that you trust that's not gonna you know start doing jazz hands inside you yeah.
• 32:45
  Craig: A lot of the nightmare stories i've heard which we'll get onto happened because
• 32:49
  Craig: they basically tried to do this with a hookup who just was not in any way looking
• 32:54
  Craig: at their safety or how to properly fist and it's yeah it can go terribly wrong which we will get on to.
• 33:03
  Joe: We will get on to it um but on the flip side,
• 33:07
  Joe: tops um everyone's got to start somewhere my first thing for for experience fisting bottoms be nice,
• 33:14
  Joe: like the um i i think an older version of me i was very like oh no i don't want to be with a,
• 33:20
  Joe: top that's never fisted before but equally everyone's got to start somewhere
• 33:23
  Joe: so being a good experience for someone teaching them how to do things how to
• 33:27
  Joe: do things safely like you know,
• 33:29
  Joe: make the fist tops that you want to see in the world by training
• 33:32
  Joe: them yourself um but yeah fisting tops
• 33:35
  Joe: and nails trim your nails and then trim them some more
• 33:38
  Joe: file them down we want to see bone we don't want to see bone but you know really
• 33:43
  Joe: like if you if you run your nail on your palm and it feels sharp imagine what
• 33:48
  Joe: that feels like on a much softer internal lining of someone's intestines you
• 33:51
  Joe: know a bit grim to say that but like it's it's little nicks feel very sharp inside someone
• 33:58
  Joe: and the bottom will feel it and will probably hopefully tell you that you need
• 34:02
  Joe: to go and trim your nails some more.
• 34:05
  Joe: Every hole is different,
• 34:08
  Joe: can't can't stress enough um what you've done with one person may be absolutely
• 34:12
  Joe: the worst thing for someone else flicking so i had a guy that was like essentially
• 34:16
  Joe: flicking me on the inside.
• 34:18
  Joe: Um because apparently that's what hit another partner of his
• 34:21
  Joe: really likes absolutely hate it absolutely can't stand
• 34:24
  Joe: it does not feel good for me like that's not what works for me so as
• 34:27
  Joe: a top kind of listening to your bottom um asking
• 34:31
  Joe: them up front like are there certain things that you don't like are there certain
• 34:34
  Joe: motions like are you uh are you a put it in and leave it there or you would
• 34:38
  Joe: put it in take it out straight away because that's how that's how i work like
• 34:41
  Joe: i need i need movement i struggle with just plonk it's in like i need i need motion.
• 34:48
  Joe: Um but yeah finding out what works um and
• 34:51
  Joe: general kink tip like read read your bottom and that's not like reading
• 34:54
  Joe: them for filth like you know um are they tense have
• 34:57
  Joe: they have they sort of they're breeding breeding breeding
• 35:01
  Joe: it's no how's their breathing that's a different king i
• 35:05
  Joe: mean sometimes hand in hand um but is their
• 35:07
  Joe: breathing kind of really short and sharp like talk to
• 35:10
  Joe: your bottom like it's i think a lot of people who don't
• 35:14
  Joe: fist kind of assume it's like this
• 35:17
  Joe: really hot just moaning like there's a lot of communication there's like
• 35:21
  Joe: i think i i really struggled that in the early days like i had
• 35:24
  Joe: in my head like i saw lots of fisting porn and i
• 35:26
  Joe: had that as like this is what fisting is but actually like talking talking during
• 35:31
  Joe: like oh could you do this could you what was that like could you move that in
• 35:34
  Joe: that way that was really hot and then once you you get into the river and you
• 35:38
  Joe: have a partner that knows what buttons to press like that's when the real fun
• 35:42
  Joe: starts but yeah tops like read your bottom find out like,
• 35:46
  Joe: find out how they're feeling kind of talk to them about how what the what the
• 35:49
  Joe: sensations there are and find what they're like general kinking general kink tip for tops and doms.
• 35:56
  Craig: No that's brilliant and it is yeah communication is key and like,
• 36:03
  Craig: being a sort of inexperienced top talking with an experienced bottom who can
• 36:09
  Craig: slowly talk you through it and where to go is both very hot and very educational.
• 36:15
  Joe: But there's also like i have to say there are and
• 36:18
  Joe: i put a note which i'll cover in a sec um there are people that don't
• 36:21
  Joe: want to talk so there are like um so
• 36:24
  Joe: like positions finding the right position that works for you um there
• 36:28
  Joe: are some people that like i don't want i don't want the eye contact like
• 36:31
  Joe: i don't want to have i want to kind of be in
• 36:33
  Joe: my zone like on all fours face in a pillow pop us
• 36:36
  Joe: up my nose you know like there are some there are some people that that's them
• 36:39
  Joe: like having that having the eye contact they feel very self-conscious that you
• 36:44
  Joe: know someone's looking at them and they might be like you know making the worst
• 36:48
  Joe: sex face you can imagine or like wailing wailing because of the sensations but.
• 36:54
  Craig: That that is all relative.
• 36:56
  Joe: It is all relative so so yeah and some people don't want that some people some people were like,
• 37:03
  Joe: it's really difficult like it's um so everyone's different everyone everyone
• 37:06
  Joe: knows what works for them um some partners you just might you might just want
• 37:10
  Joe: to be like yeah i'll be face down please do what you will others like i want
• 37:13
  Joe: to watch you i want the eye contact i want to communicate,
• 37:17
  Joe: um and i put i put this i forgot to talk about this for bottoms um
• 37:20
  Joe: headspace and persona um this is something that
• 37:23
  Joe: i've i have been exploring and with hypnosis recently as well
• 37:25
  Joe: but um there was a a guy i used to have fun with
• 37:28
  Joe: a while back um and i always thought
• 37:31
  Joe: it was weird and now i completely get it he would
• 37:34
  Joe: always put on a cap he'd turn up
• 37:37
  Joe: wearing a hat when he gets into fisting mode he
• 37:40
  Joe: turns his cap backwards and i always thought it
• 37:42
  Joe: was weird like it was like if you know if you want to wear a cap in the bedroom like
• 37:45
  Joe: by all means i've now figured out
• 37:49
  Joe: that is his that is his i'm going into
• 37:51
  Joe: fisting modes like um a trigger
• 37:55
  Joe: something that kind of links to i'm
• 37:58
  Joe: gonna have loads of fun and relax and be an absolute fisting slut like um i
• 38:02
  Joe: like i've got um a collar that i use so i put on a collar so hypnosis collar
• 38:06
  Joe: kind of connections to being a fisting bottom um so i do that now um but kind
• 38:12
  Joe: of what can get you into that kinky submissive headspace or just that.
• 38:18
  Joe: You know make a persona if you find it difficult to relax or find it kind of
• 38:22
  Joe: weird like create a persona that's your fisting persona that kind of you switch
• 38:26
  Joe: something that you can do that switches you into that mode um as a little little
• 38:30
  Joe: tip which i've been exploring i'm.
• 38:32
  Craig: Like to be clear you don't need to do actual hypnosis.
• 38:35
  Joe: That is very.
• 38:36
  Craig: Fun like it is literally just sort of making these connections
• 38:39
  Craig: and associations in your brain like when this
• 38:42
  Craig: item of clothing is worn this is the headspace i'm in
• 38:45
  Craig: like again i do that in the gym i
• 38:48
  Craig: have my gym clothes and it's when i get into these i am here to focus and work
• 38:52
  Craig: at the gym and again like when you put on gear like if i put on a hood i'm in
• 38:57
  Craig: a subby space if i put on my levers i get into a more dummy space like making
• 39:02
  Craig: these connections in your brain is a really quick sort of shortcut that can make things quite fun.
• 39:07
  Joe: And it's like phrases as well so like open up for daddy one
• 39:10
  Joe: i love for many reasons um a it's
• 39:14
  Joe: hot like if you're if you're the boy in that scenario and you
• 39:17
  Joe: have a guy saying open up for daddy like a lot of be a
• 39:20
  Joe: good boy like you find you find like those connections that
• 39:22
  Joe: kind of get you into that space and especially if you're having a
• 39:25
  Joe: great time you start linking the second you hear open up for daddy
• 39:28
  Joe: you instantly relax as you know what's coming next so it's
• 39:31
  Joe: a lot of a lot of like talk to talk to your top um find
• 39:35
  Joe: find what you think is absolutely hot that's going
• 39:38
  Joe: to really work for you and just keep doing it when you're having fun and you'll
• 39:41
  Joe: find that certain things like prepping the scene like putting on a certain song
• 39:45
  Joe: putting on a certain music um as you kind of get into it you start your body
• 39:49
  Joe: starts to relax because you know what's coming next so those sort of connections
• 39:53
  Joe: are wonderful for fisting instantly get you relaxed yeah.
• 39:57
  Craig: Also once we're done with this section i'm going to put a little pin on this
• 40:01
  Craig: because there's a little tangent i want to go on about sort of terms and mindsets.
• 40:04
  Joe: Oh we love tangents yes uh.
• 40:11
  Craig: So, yeah, where were we up to?
• 40:13
  Joe: I think I've got dangers of fisting, horror stories and whatnot.
• 40:19
  Craig: So, yeah. So let's go on to that tangent now before we go on. Cool.
• 40:23
  Joe: Tangent away.
• 40:24
  Craig: There was something really interesting that happened with a friend who,
• 40:30
  Craig: talking about his mindset shifting with terms, he used to very much not like when people would,
• 40:39
  Craig: or at least male presenting people would refer
• 40:42
  Craig: their genitals as like my pussy
• 40:45
  Craig: or my cunt oh very for
• 40:48
  Craig: me go on yeah but then he started fisting and
• 40:53
  Craig: suddenly that switched in him because it um sort of it made sense that you'd
• 41:00
  Craig: discuss it as something as more of a sexual organ and something that could bring
• 41:04
  Craig: you pleasure and that opened up this whole new mindset for him,
• 41:09
  Craig: and like i have to say as i've been training myself i kind of get like,
• 41:14
  Craig: yeah i get why that's happening yeah.
• 41:16
  Joe: I mean that that's big for me.
• 41:18
  Craig: So like i.
• 41:19
  Joe: I for the last like four years i refer to my ass as a pussy like in.
• 41:23
  Craig: And i i.
• 41:24
  Joe: Appreciate not for everyone like i am i am very upfront with partners like new
• 41:30
  Joe: partners especially like.
• 41:31
  Craig: This is why.
• 41:32
  Joe: I call my ass like it's not if it's not for you that's fine we can still have
• 41:35
  Joe: fun In my head, I'm kind of going, like, I kind of want people that will call
• 41:39
  Joe: it that, because it is, for me, it's my main sexual organ.
• 41:43
  Joe: I know you've done a whole, like, I think you did a podcast on modification recently.
• 41:51
  Joe: I'm sure I saw it on the list.
• 41:53
  Craig: On pumping.
• 41:54
  Joe: Oh, pumping. Well, body modification, like, my brain, realising I don't,
• 41:58
  Joe: like, really... We're not going to go too far into this tangent,
• 42:00
  Joe: because we could be here all day, but...
• 42:02
  Craig: I mean...
• 42:03
  Craig: I think I know where you're going and that's going to be in its own episode
• 42:06
  Craig: because you are not the only person I know who's gone through this. Cool.
• 42:09
  Joe: But for, for, for, for those wondering, yeah. I'm not overly feeling connected
• 42:13
  Joe: to my current genitals, born very much male, very much like,
• 42:17
  Joe: I don't really, don't really like my dick.
• 42:19
  Joe: I'm very much a pussy boy. That's how I describe myself. And then going,
• 42:22
  Joe: Ooh, maybe you can just get an actual pussy.
• 42:26
  Joe: Maybe you can fully go through lots of therapy, which is what I'm currently
• 42:29
  Joe: going through to go towards surgery.
• 42:31
  Joe: Um we can unpick that at a later date but um
• 42:34
  Joe: but very much like that that kind of mindset of you
• 42:37
  Joe: know biologically speaking your butt is for is
• 42:41
  Joe: for excretion it's for getting rid of waste um switching
• 42:44
  Joe: that that mental kind of like we've done
• 42:47
  Joe: the prep work we've cleaned everything out we're good to go it's now pussy like
• 42:51
  Joe: it's now for pleasure you are going to get so much pleasure
• 42:53
  Joe: from someone using you in this way stretching you in this way you are
• 42:56
  Joe: going to give a top so much pleasure from them using you in this way whether
• 43:00
  Joe: it's their dick hand toys like their it's that kind of switch in headspace to
• 43:05
  Joe: kind of go like oh like it is now a sexual organ yeah um which i very much feel
• 43:12
  Joe: very close to heart about that.
• 43:14
  Craig: Yeah and it's and again going back to like not everyone likes that but it's
• 43:19
  Craig: also have you sat down and unpicked why you don't like that.
• 43:23
  Joe: Internalized misogyny you say yes yes it's part of the reason.
• 43:27
  Craig: Why i like using the term bussy or the fx rc to a lot of stuff to see people's
• 43:31
  Craig: reactions and it's like where does this reaction come from.
• 43:35
  Joe: Why are you so.
• 43:36
  Craig: Alarmed by these sorts of words.
• 43:39
  Joe: Oh no we're going into toxic masculinity headspace yeah um it's
• 43:43
  Joe: just like oh no um but yeah it is it
• 43:45
  Joe: is that kind of um macho macho man
• 43:49
  Joe: we're muscular we're muscular macho men who only do
• 43:51
  Joe: manly things in a manly way even when we're bottoming with
• 43:54
  Joe: men we're manly men i'm like fully put
• 43:57
  Joe: me in a corset and call me a little pussy boy
• 44:00
  Joe: and have your way with me like i love i love the kind of fuckery of you know
• 44:05
  Joe: built masculine body perhaps slightly femme adjacent femme sort of headspace
• 44:11
  Joe: of being a little pussy boy being used so i've overcome that hurdle i very much
• 44:16
  Joe: wasn't that person a long time ago yeah.
• 44:18
  Craig: And again it's like for some people it is like mass like traditional or i mean
• 44:23
  Craig: not traditional but sort of that stereotypical masculinity is their turn on
• 44:27
  Craig: and that's just how their brain is wired it's just i just wish people would
• 44:31
  Craig: sort of maybe sit down and unpick that first to see where it comes from.
• 44:34
  Joe: Yeah because.
• 44:35
  Craig: Again nothing may change it may
• 44:37
  Craig: always be just like that is what turns you on but it's good to know why.
• 44:43
  Joe: Yeah that's a it's a good thing i think a lot of people just need to spend some
• 44:46
  Joe: time not even just about that just generally thinking about why they do things why they like things,
• 44:54
  Joe: hope you don't unpick anything scary from your past when doing so yeah it's
• 44:58
  Joe: good it's good to understand yourself a bit more exactly.
• 45:01
  Craig: Uh so with that i think that's a good place to leave that tangent so we on this
• 45:07
  Craig: show always like to discuss safety if we can.
• 45:09
  Joe: Yes so.
• 45:10
  Craig: Yes let's get on to safety um trigger warning we will be going into what happens
• 45:16
  Craig: when things go wrong and that can get quite bad.
• 45:20
  Joe: It can and we'll start off light we
• 45:23
  Joe: won't go full into the hospitalization parts but
• 45:26
  Joe: um as as this is this is
• 45:28
  Joe: an extreme sport um not in the olympics yet but
• 45:31
  Joe: maybe one day it will be um tears minor
• 45:35
  Joe: tears so you are stretching parts of
• 45:38
  Joe: your body um even even non-fisters probably
• 45:42
  Joe: have have experienced um tears or fissures
• 45:45
  Joe: anal fissures little cuts around um around
• 45:48
  Joe: your ring piece not not pleasant takes forever to heal an
• 45:51
  Joe: absolute pain in the ass definitely pun intended on that
• 45:54
  Joe: one um but internal tears so like um
• 45:57
  Joe: it is not and this is this is
• 46:00
  Joe: where like experience knowing what's what's
• 46:03
  Joe: fine and what isn't so um you will
• 46:07
  Joe: make little tears full stop you are
• 46:10
  Joe: stretching your insides there will be small
• 46:12
  Joe: tears um sometimes you might see a little bit of like a little bit of blood
• 46:18
  Joe: a little bit of pink like light pink like in the lube and that's fine like that
• 46:23
  Joe: that will happen if it's if it's just a tiny bit you're like oh i've stretched
• 46:26
  Joe: something give it a minute can i go back in sort of thing um.
• 46:32
  Joe: If if it's a lot take
• 46:35
  Joe: a longer break consider maybe stopping um if it's dark
• 46:38
  Joe: stop immediately so so everyone everyone's
• 46:42
  Joe: kind of um i'm trying to think of a good example like
• 46:45
  Joe: if you're like light light
• 46:48
  Joe: colored blood is like if you cut yourself slightly you might
• 46:51
  Joe: see a little bit a little bit of light blood like if you're brushing your teeth
• 46:54
  Joe: and you've got bad gums um you know you might see a little bit of light colored
• 46:58
  Joe: like it's not it's a sign that something has been the the skin the tissue has
• 47:03
  Joe: been broken slightly but it's it's superficial it's not it's not catastrophic
• 47:08
  Joe: the second you see dark blood hospital straight away.
• 47:11
  Joe: Yeah don't be embarrassed like genuinely do not be embarrassed um actually not
• 47:16
  Joe: hospital straight away if it's a lot consider talking to a healthcare professional
• 47:20
  Joe: like i don't want to scare people like if you suddenly see blood because some
• 47:23
  Joe: people are like what is that is that light it's that dark like,
• 47:27
  Joe: if it's a lot consider seeing since it is seeing someone to assist and this
• 47:30
  Joe: is why like lots of lube taking your time and knowing your partner trimming
• 47:34
  Joe: your nails important um cuts and tears if you have sharp little bits of your
• 47:39
  Joe: nails sticking out you will catch bits of people's insides and make it bleed slightly like.
• 47:44
  Craig: I mean uh propanol gloves really good option like they help a lot with this.
• 47:49
  Joe: Um yeah and
• 47:52
  Joe: and with that with any tears obviously sti risk if
• 47:56
  Joe: you're if you're you know not everyone does this some people it's just fisting
• 47:59
  Joe: and that's it um if you're going to get getting fucked afterwards um
• 48:02
  Joe: you know like if if you're having a bareback sex
• 48:05
  Joe: and you're getting fucked after fisting you'd likely have small cuts
• 48:08
  Joe: and tears inside you your risk of contracting something is
• 48:11
  Joe: therefore a lot higher um so it's all these little things to kind
• 48:14
  Joe: of bear in mind with with fisting
• 48:17
  Joe: and and sort of generic you
• 48:20
  Joe: know like generic i can't find a nice word for just getting fucked
• 48:23
  Joe: like yeah basic sex um it's one
• 48:26
  Joe: of those things that if you're if you're being fisted your chance of catching
• 48:29
  Joe: something is probably going to be a lot higher like you've you've stretched
• 48:33
  Joe: you have cuts you have minor abrasions you have multiple places for bacteria
• 48:37
  Joe: and viruses to break into your body um so it's bear in mind um more seriously
• 48:42
  Joe: though and i when When I used to live in London,
• 48:45
  Joe: there was a tale of a certain individual who unfortunately had hospitalized
• 48:48
  Joe: multiple people. Perforations.
• 48:52
  Craig: They happen.
• 48:57
  Joe: I mean, there's no real nice way to say it. There are some people...
• 49:01
  Joe: This is that kind of conversation with Tops.
• 49:03
  Joe: What's your experience with fisting?
• 49:06
  Joe: If they're new, that's completely fine. But you have that conversation. You know, therefore...
• 49:11
  Joe: All the basics to cover like you know like don't just splay your
• 49:15
  Joe: hand out like jazz handing inside me i think that's a bad idea
• 49:18
  Joe: um but perforation happens like i've
• 49:21
  Joe: thankfully never experienced that i've got some friends who have um who
• 49:24
  Joe: have been playing with guys have gotten quite rough or quite deep using
• 49:28
  Joe: toys and obviously as a top you don't
• 49:31
  Joe: know what that toy feels like inside someone which is why lubes
• 49:34
  Joe: going slow understanding your bottom um but
• 49:37
  Joe: you know you can perforate your intestines and that's serious
• 49:41
  Joe: go to hospital immediately hospital immediately
• 49:44
  Joe: that will require surgical intervention it
• 49:47
  Joe: will and it's it's like i i
• 49:50
  Joe: know there are there are tales there are internet tales going back eons of of
• 49:55
  Joe: people that um you know perforated their insides didn't go to hospital and died
• 50:00
  Joe: like they were too embarrassed to go to hospital yeah yeah and i'm like would
• 50:04
  Joe: you rather be slightly embarrassed or would you rather be dead yeah this is the thing if.
• 50:08
  Craig: Your colon gets perforated you need to get that sorted out.
• 50:12
  Joe: Yeah how do you know i mean if there's a massive
• 50:16
  Joe: discomfort and you're kind of like i don't
• 50:18
  Joe: know what that feels like because i've never been i've never had any sort of serious
• 50:21
  Joe: issue like that but if there's lots of dark blood go
• 50:24
  Joe: to hospital immediately like you have likely perforated something
• 50:27
  Joe: you need help and it might
• 50:30
  Joe: be embarrassing thing you might be like oh god i've got to go to hospital and be
• 50:33
  Joe: like hey i was shoving giant toys inside me and now i'm bleeding profusely like
• 50:38
  Joe: they don't care like they've seen worse they've seen guys that accidentally
• 50:41
  Joe: fell on that ketchup bottle that happened to have a condom on like you were
• 50:44
  Joe: having fun fun exploratory sex you were stretching yourself and you have an
• 50:48
  Joe: accident like get help yeah it's like um.
• 50:52
  Craig: There's actually a uh fisting,
• 50:57
  Craig: he most of his career is fate uh around fisting uh porn star who recently did have to be hospitalized,
• 51:06
  Craig: teddy bryce.
• 51:07
  Joe: Yeah because.
• 51:09
  Craig: He actually went on to um the big dipper
• 51:11
  Craig: podcast so if you look up his episode he describes what happens and what happened
• 51:16
  Craig: to him and it's quite interesting because for him what it was was um he did
• 51:21
  Craig: a deep clean and there was a pocket of water so when the top fisted him it caused
• 51:27
  Craig: pressure and essentially burst the side.
• 51:30
  Joe: Yeah not good yeah this isn't
• 51:33
  Joe: to scare people by the way like like it's again this
• 51:36
  Joe: is this isn't this isn't like simplistic basic sex
• 51:40
  Joe: this can be quite extreme like there's a level there's
• 51:42
  Joe: a much higher level of preparation that goes into it there's a
• 51:45
  Joe: lot more risk associated with it you can do it to a
• 51:48
  Joe: degree of safety like it's not i wouldn't
• 51:51
  Joe: say it's safe to do i wouldn't say it's unsafe to do but like with anything
• 51:54
  Joe: that's kind of on the more extreme end of the spectrum like you
• 51:58
  Joe: need to kind of know what you're doing and be more cautious have fun
• 52:01
  Joe: by all means but understand your body and like
• 52:04
  Joe: having a top kind of understand what the risks are and go slowly when
• 52:07
  Joe: they need to kind of read the room to
• 52:10
  Joe: kind of you know understand what things feel like um but
• 52:15
  Joe: yeah that there are there is there is potential for horrible things
• 52:18
  Joe: you've got you know on your skin you have lots of pressure
• 52:21
  Joe: sensors your nerves can kind of feel where things are inside you
• 52:23
  Joe: just feel pressure and intensity like you don't have
• 52:26
  Joe: that level of like if you cut your finger you know
• 52:29
  Joe: you've cut your finger and it's always yeah fucking awful um
• 52:33
  Joe: inside if you cut yourself slightly like those sort of like
• 52:35
  Joe: minor tears that aren't really serious you don't know like you can't feel
• 52:38
  Joe: that so it's one of those things that you you have less sensitivity sensitivity
• 52:44
  Joe: inside yourself to kind of know when when you might have overdone it so it's
• 52:47
  Joe: knowing your body taking your time if you think you've gone too far like if
• 52:52
  Joe: you're like oh we should take a break breaks are good breaks are fun yeah have some snacks a.
• 52:57
  Craig: Session does not have to be quick often it's better if it's long you take breaks
• 53:01
  Craig: like cuddle for a bit restart change direction.
• 53:06
  Joe: Um but yeah it's just if ever
• 53:10
  Joe: if ever you're feeling odd you're feeling unsure things like
• 53:13
  Joe: there's especially dark blood hospital straight away
• 53:15
  Joe: like don't yeah i'd rather i would rather people
• 53:18
  Joe: if people listening kind of going oh i'm not sure if i should
• 53:21
  Joe: go to hospital or not just go i'd rather you
• 53:24
  Joe: i'd rather you go and someone go like if it's dark and
• 53:27
  Joe: you're worried go and get checked like
• 53:31
  Joe: you will feel even if it's nothing and it's like yeah it
• 53:33
  Joe: was something mine it was a bit darker than usual but it's nothing
• 53:36
  Joe: to worry about at least you can kind of rest assured that it's okay i'd rather
• 53:40
  Joe: you do that than sit at home going oh i'm sure it's fine and then oh i'm starting
• 53:44
  Joe: to feel tired or i feel a bit faint a bit cold i'm like yeah not good go to
• 53:49
  Joe: hospital yeah yeah but that's the scary stuff done that's the kind of that's
• 53:54
  Joe: the horrible stuff you know that's.
• 53:56
  Craig: The worst case scenario.
• 53:57
  Joe: There are tales of that there are obviously lots of people that do this and
• 54:00
  Joe: have great times with no issues or only minor issues um but yeah that's that's
• 54:06
  Joe: the more negative scary stuff but we get on to the good stuff though like the aftercare,
• 54:11
  Joe: the lovely fun stuff i mean i mean great for you like not fisting wise but generally
• 54:16
  Joe: aftercare what is aftercare for you.
• 54:18
  Craig: A chance to decompress um
• 54:22
  Craig: like i've talked about i'm on autistic
• 54:25
  Craig: spectrum so sensory stuff is nice for me so a chance to have a bit of quiet
• 54:30
  Craig: just maybe cuddling for a bit like a hot cup of tea is very nice um just being
• 54:37
  Craig: able to be just left for a little bit even and just to sort of let my brain
• 54:41
  Craig: wind down from the all intense experiences and sensations like.
• 54:47
  Joe: Yeah yeah.
• 54:48
  Craig: How about you what's your aftercare.
• 54:49
  Joe: Um cuddles and snacks always cuddles and
• 54:52
  Joe: snacks i'm always hungry and especially with fisting like
• 54:55
  Joe: you know you've you've cleaned out a large part of what your body wanted to
• 54:59
  Joe: absorb tmi moment but um yeah i i know i i usually have um not that i always
• 55:06
  Joe: have a giant box of small teasers on my desk because this is a rarity but having
• 55:10
  Joe: snacks that you can be like yeah
• 55:11
  Joe: i can get my energy back up you know i've got a fruity drink that's oh.
• 55:15
  Craig: Yeah sugary drink.
• 55:16
  Joe: Yeah got me back energized because.
• 55:18
  Craig: You have burned through a lot of your.
• 55:20
  Joe: Body's glucose.
• 55:21
  Craig: Reserves doing all this activity um so your body will have a basically a sugar
• 55:27
  Craig: crash like i've uh was at a it was my birthday dungeon party a couple of years
• 55:33
  Craig: ago and someone got fisted and then afterwards they got quite.
• 55:39
  Joe: Uh cold yeah and.
• 55:41
  Craig: Like low energy and it's like yeah you've not eaten anything and you've been
• 55:45
  Craig: in the sling for a good couple of minutes let's get you some birthday cake let's
• 55:49
  Craig: get you some coca-cola let's wrap you up.
• 55:51
  Joe: I had the exact same experience where i had this is
• 55:54
  Joe: this was back when i was sort of experience experimenting with like um
• 55:57
  Joe: oh i'll eat a bit less or the night before i'll do
• 56:00
  Joe: like a part do shit in the morning so i'm like trying to find out what works
• 56:03
  Joe: for me i had a great a fucking great session there may
• 56:05
  Joe: or may not be videos of this session um with an
• 56:08
  Joe: absolutely lovely daddy and we were on the sofa afterwards
• 56:11
  Joe: and i i just started feeling cold and then
• 56:14
  Joe: i started getting shaky and shivery and i
• 56:17
  Joe: was just like oh i don't feel very well and when i realized i hadn't really eaten much
• 56:20
  Joe: um so it so he went and got like
• 56:23
  Joe: biscuits basically and i inhaled biscuits and felt better
• 56:26
  Joe: but um but aftercare for me is it's hugging it's it's
• 56:29
  Joe: it's that intimate like you've just done something absolutely
• 56:33
  Joe: disgusting to your body um so having
• 56:36
  Joe: a cuddle having especially with daddy or
• 56:39
  Joe: a boy if i'm in that that's all headspace having that kind of intimate moment
• 56:43
  Joe: um sort of cool down afterwards just
• 56:47
  Joe: relaxing talking um but after i do it's different for everyone like i know people
• 56:51
  Joe: that are like i want them to go i want people to leave me alone and i want to
• 56:55
  Joe: go and have a bath or i want to get under the bed under the bed i want to get
• 57:01
  Joe: under the duvet and watch cartoons like aftercare is different for different people um,
• 57:06
  Joe: find out what works for you but hugs hugs if you're a hugger hugs are always good and.
• 57:11
  Craig: Again like we've been talking about like from the bottoms perspective this is
• 57:14
  Craig: also a physically intense and emotionally intense process.
• 57:17
  Joe: For the top.
• 57:18
  Craig: Uh they also need aftercare.
• 57:20
  Joe: They do indeed I think that gets forgotten about a lot it's very fisting everyone
• 57:25
  Joe: focuses on the bottom the top you know needs a hug needs to be told we did a great job.
• 57:29
  Craig: Needs a hug needs a.
• 57:30
  Joe: Hand massage yeah moisturising the hands you know hands did a lot of exercise,
• 57:38
  Joe: but yeah aftercare is different for different people across the board so yeah
• 57:41
  Joe: find out what works for you and do that,
• 57:46
  Joe: I do have on my list though I have Kems the wondrous discussion of chems and
• 57:51
  Joe: there's no, you know, it's the fisting scene you know, there are pockets of
• 57:56
  Joe: all scenes that are chem-heavy. I find fisting,
• 58:00
  Joe: proportionally has a higher level of chem use um
• 58:04
  Joe: chems are great in that regard like
• 58:07
  Joe: in terms of like i've dabbled like i'm very upfront about that like
• 58:10
  Joe: it's chems aren't for me i don't drink i don't i smoke
• 58:13
  Joe: a cigar every now and again but i don't really do chems um but
• 58:16
  Joe: it you know mind altering things that can help you relax and
• 58:19
  Joe: really like and that's that's it basically it's that altered state
• 58:22
  Joe: to get you relaxed um so there
• 58:25
  Joe: are lots of people into fisting that use chems for that reason being able to
• 58:29
  Joe: instantly chemically get you completely off your face to the point that you
• 58:32
  Joe: can you so relaxed your whole kind of stretch so much um and you kind of get
• 58:37
  Joe: that jump start into it um but obviously chems come with a lot of downsides
• 58:42
  Joe: and issues and potential addiction.
• 58:45
  Joe: Um i i would say like it's everyone you know
• 58:47
  Joe: it's it's everyone's own personal decision to make if
• 58:50
  Joe: they want to play on chems or not um i would say for tops
• 58:53
  Joe: um i will not play with a top uh if
• 58:56
  Joe: they are on chems um yeah or if they're
• 58:59
  Joe: if they're if drinking as well like if someone's
• 59:02
  Joe: been drinking um i tend to avoid
• 59:05
  Joe: someone top of me in that way like i want someone that's
• 59:08
  Joe: going to be in control of the wheel and be fully like on the same level as me
• 59:12
  Joe: to look after me um that's my choice that's how i that's how i roll um i know
• 59:17
  Joe: friends that are into fisting that use chems a lot and that really works for
• 59:20
  Joe: them and personal choice i i always say don't do it yeah that's just me as a,
• 59:27
  Joe: healthcare professional that likes people
• 59:30
  Joe: to look after the bodies kind of going maybe don't do this but
• 59:33
  Joe: if you want to do it safely look up you know look up information on what chems
• 59:37
  Joe: you're taking things to look out for and this isn't a chems podcast but um unfortunately
• 59:42
  Joe: fisting has a high proportion of chem users and it's it's something that you
• 59:47
  Joe: again chatting to a future partner potential partner ask them about chems and
• 59:51
  Joe: ask them if they use chems um.
• 59:54
  Joe: No judgment but it's important to know like i've had
• 59:58
  Joe: scenarios with guys who i haven't said anything and i've turned up and they've
• 1:00:02
  Joe: been a bit a bit loopy shall we say um i've had guys where i'm really clear
• 1:00:06
  Joe: like i'm not into chems i i don't want a sexual partner for fisting specifically
• 1:00:11
  Joe: i don't want them to be on chems for this reason i turn up and they're on the high,
• 1:00:16
  Joe: um so it's important to have those conversations up
• 1:00:19
  Joe: front ask them what they use i use poppers fucking love poppers
• 1:00:22
  Joe: great things um again another thing some people don't like poppers some people
• 1:00:27
  Joe: um for health reasons can't be around poppers so yeah important discussion points
• 1:00:32
  Joe: to have around um yeah any substances that you may want to use or thinking about
• 1:00:37
  Joe: using and talking to partners if they're happy with that or yeah like.
• 1:00:40
  Craig: Also don't like one of the problems i keep coming across um it's like the same
• 1:00:47
  Craig: way people always go up and twist people's nipples.
• 1:00:50
  Joe: Like first off yeah it's.
• 1:00:51
  Craig: Like one of the things is like they just assume everyone's okay with poppers
• 1:00:55
  Craig: and will like shove it under their partner's nose and it's like some people
• 1:00:58
  Craig: have taken viagra which you cannot mix some people are on nitrate based medication
• 1:01:03
  Craig: some people are on certain blood pressure medications and you cannot mix these
• 1:01:07
  Craig: with poppers because the results can be disastrous.
• 1:01:10
  Joe: Yes so always say i i'm
• 1:01:13
  Joe: always like i like using poppers for fisting is that
• 1:01:16
  Joe: okay with you do you like to take poppers and i've got
• 1:01:18
  Joe: partners that are like poppers aren't for me happy for you to do.
• 1:01:21
  Joe: Them um please do them at certain.
• 1:01:24
  Joe: Points to make things even more fun um but it's
• 1:01:27
  Joe: one of those things of of communication is key finding
• 1:01:31
  Joe: out what your potential partners are happy with um
• 1:01:34
  Joe: or physically cannot be around um but
• 1:01:38
  Joe: i'm a big advocate for and even for poppers actually um
• 1:01:41
  Joe: getting used to taking fists about anything getting getting
• 1:01:44
  Joe: in tune with your own body like i
• 1:01:47
  Joe: find poppers as an additional fun thing on top that
• 1:01:50
  Joe: kind of especially where i want to go you know getting
• 1:01:53
  Joe: punched a punch fisting more even more intense
• 1:01:56
  Joe: things poppers kind of help make it make it
• 1:01:59
  Joe: more fun and easier to take um rather
• 1:02:02
  Joe: than an initial straight on straight on poppers straight away you
• 1:02:05
  Joe: know so that's my stance everyone's got
• 1:02:08
  Joe: different stances no judgment from me but um yeah
• 1:02:11
  Joe: just talk to your partners about things um but
• 1:02:16
  Joe: oh toys safety and toys i completely
• 1:02:18
  Joe: forgot um on on the
• 1:02:21
  Joe: the dangers on the dangers of fisting uh make
• 1:02:25
  Joe: sure you use suction cups or toys with balls on them um
• 1:02:28
  Joe: do not lose objects inside you i have a great
• 1:02:31
  Joe: story um names not said for for reasons i i had a friend who i was over their
• 1:02:39
  Joe: house who had a housemate who was clearly having a little party to himself upstairs
• 1:02:44
  Joe: uh very thumper thumper music um and we heard a loud bang and crash.
• 1:02:53
  Joe: Music suddenly got turned off little footsteps downstairs
• 1:02:56
  Joe: knock on the door but you know my friend popped
• 1:03:00
  Joe: out to see what's going on came back giggling he had lost his
• 1:03:03
  Joe: toy inside him and he could not get it out
• 1:03:05
  Joe: and he had to go to amy to have it removed
• 1:03:08
  Joe: which i find i feel for him but
• 1:03:11
  Joe: i also find very funny like it's not funny it's
• 1:03:14
  Joe: not funny in any way but it you know it's one of
• 1:03:17
  Joe: those things for there's so many toy brands there are so
• 1:03:19
  Joe: many great toys out there and i think the best toys
• 1:03:22
  Joe: usually have some form of safety mechanism like
• 1:03:25
  Joe: gatekeepers you have the flared base at the bottom of
• 1:03:28
  Joe: the the plug so it doesn't you know it doesn't just fling inside
• 1:03:31
  Joe: you and get lost um but yeah toys and
• 1:03:35
  Joe: safety please make sure you have something with a suction cup or
• 1:03:38
  Joe: things with like um something at the end to stop it getting lost in
• 1:03:40
  Joe: you um don't put things inside you
• 1:03:43
  Joe: unless you're so confident you're gonna
• 1:03:46
  Joe: get them out again um things like eggs like
• 1:03:49
  Joe: not obviously chicken eggs but you know like sort of eggs type things that you
• 1:03:53
  Joe: pop in and pop back out um if you lose them your body makes a lovely suction
• 1:03:58
  Joe: kind of vacuum and it makes them extremely hard to get out and you may have
• 1:04:03
  Joe: to have them surgically removed so um yes know your toys um yeah.
• 1:04:08
  Craig: And also it's worth saying um silicone is comes in different standards uh all
• 1:04:19
  Craig: like good silicone toys are expensive.
• 1:04:23
  Joe: They.
• 1:04:24
  Craig: Are an investment but the thing is they are a necessary investment because the
• 1:04:30
  Craig: cheaper ones melt and degrade very quickly.
• 1:04:34
  Joe: Yes they do um don't store on that note don't store um different types of silicon
• 1:04:40
  Joe: next to each other because they will melt yes um so you found that in your drawer
• 1:04:44
  Joe: and you go to get a toy ages like later and you find that where it's been sat
• 1:04:48
  Joe: against something it's melted into a really weird shape yeah so like.
• 1:04:53
  Craig: The reason silicone is used both in like
• 1:04:55
  Craig: sex toys but also cooking and surgeries and like medical settings is silicone
• 1:05:02
  Craig: is very inert against most other substances the one thing it will react to is
• 1:05:07
  Craig: other silicone um this brings on to the topic of silicone lube silicone toys.
• 1:05:14
  Joe: Yes uh.
• 1:05:15
  Craig: People say like you can never use it the general understanding i always have
• 1:05:19
  Craig: and what i found to be true is if you get platinum grade silicone so long as
• 1:05:25
  Craig: you wash your toys afterwards which you should always be doing anyway like then it will not affect them,
• 1:05:32
  Craig: because you're washing off straight away and platinum grade is i don't know
• 1:05:37
  Craig: what the chemical term is but it's solid like consistent and stable enough that
• 1:05:41
  Craig: it won't instant react to it.
• 1:05:42
  Joe: And also with toys don't share your toys in terms.
• 1:05:45
  Joe: Of share your toys with friends when they're washed but in
• 1:05:48
  Joe: in group scenarios with another with another person you're going
• 1:05:51
  Joe: to be using toys on each other um assign toys
• 1:05:54
  Joe: sounds very silly but like um you know
• 1:05:57
  Joe: bacteria from someone's intestines into yours not always
• 1:06:00
  Joe: the best thing sti risks things like that um so
• 1:06:03
  Joe: like yeah don't share toys unless you've properly cleaned them but
• 1:06:06
  Joe: toys so i like this in terms of like
• 1:06:09
  Joe: thinking of like leather communities handing down leather i'm
• 1:06:12
  Joe: the same with toys so i i
• 1:06:16
  Joe: have gotten to a point where i've got i've got two big drawers full
• 1:06:19
  Joe: of full of toys um one of
• 1:06:21
  Joe: them there is like a portion that i don't really use anymore they're i
• 1:06:26
  Joe: either didn't like them like the sensation wasn't for me
• 1:06:29
  Joe: as far as shape or they're too small for me now if you
• 1:06:32
  Joe: have if you're if you're a very experienced sort of
• 1:06:35
  Joe: fisting bottom and you've got loads of toys you don't use consider giving them
• 1:06:38
  Joe: to friends like genuinely like toys are expensive
• 1:06:41
  Joe: um you cannot sell toys on like
• 1:06:44
  Joe: second skin on websites for for health reasons
• 1:06:47
  Joe: you know you can't they they will not take that risk of
• 1:06:50
  Joe: of buying a second-hand toy to give someone in case that then infects
• 1:06:53
  Joe: them or something or makes them ill um but generally speaking
• 1:06:56
  Joe: if you've got toys that you don't use anymore and you have a friend who's like
• 1:07:00
  Joe: starting off um you know especially if you're if you talk openly about sex and
• 1:07:04
  Joe: your friends know you're a big old fisting bomb like i've had this usually friends
• 1:07:08
  Joe: will come to you and say hey i'm just i'm trying to get used to this can i get
• 1:07:12
  Joe: some advice um ask them what toys they've got.
• 1:07:15
  Joe: If you have toys you don't use consider selling them for cheap pass them on
• 1:07:20
  Joe: as goodwill like toys are expensive it's nice to kind of see toys still get
• 1:07:24
  Joe: get use and get get get given a second life of someone else so um me and my
• 1:07:29
  Joe: sentimental side just kind of go and you know.
• 1:07:31
  Craig: No that's very sweet.
• 1:07:32
  Joe: Fist it forwards kind of like here's an
• 1:07:36
  Joe: old toy i don't use please please enjoy to the best of your
• 1:07:38
  Joe: abilities um but you said lubes so
• 1:07:41
  Joe: lots of different lubes so many like i think every time
• 1:07:44
  Joe: i go to any like to clone zone or any sex sex store
• 1:07:47
  Joe: there's new lube i've never seen before and i mean different types so water
• 1:07:52
  Joe: versus silicon versus oil basically so you got your oils crisco if you think
• 1:07:57
  Joe: fisting you think crisco um grease based things boy butter elbow grease there's
• 1:08:04
  Joe: probably loads of branded things um,
• 1:08:07
  Joe: every this is where it's again a very personal preference so
• 1:08:10
  Joe: some people will love them some people love like they're very thick
• 1:08:13
  Joe: um i've got a friend who uses like oil lube
• 1:08:16
  Joe: first to like line the hole and then um sort
• 1:08:19
  Joe: of j lube x lube etc which we're going to to kind of be the main lube yeah you
• 1:08:24
  Joe: find what works for you i'm not a massive fan of oil-based um but in that safety
• 1:08:30
  Joe: again sort of line um my brain's not working oil-based not good for condoms and condoms and gloves,
• 1:08:38
  Joe: so um oil-based loads will break them down over time so if you're having safe
• 1:08:42
  Joe: sex if using gloves for a specific reason they can degrade them um as well how
• 1:08:47
  Joe: you store them like oils like grisco if you don't store it properly can grow
• 1:08:54
  Joe: pleasant things inside and you should if you've had it.
• 1:08:57
  Craig: Can go rancid.
• 1:08:58
  Joe: If you've had a tub of crisco for a while maybe check that you're still in date
• 1:09:01
  Joe: and you shouldn't be throwing it out by now because you don't want to put that inside.
• 1:09:04
  Craig: You mixed up x lube you should never keep it for more than what is it a week.
• 1:09:08
  Joe: Yeah i don't know the exact thing um
• 1:09:11
  Joe: and there's um i think it's called the donut factory it's
• 1:09:14
  Joe: something like that um there's a website that has like lube lube
• 1:09:17
  Joe: recipes um because everyone
• 1:09:20
  Joe: everyone swears by that one recipe that uses clove oil or
• 1:09:24
  Joe: that one recipe that does this that has um so
• 1:09:27
  Joe: um a fisting daddy i've got in london he puts
• 1:09:30
  Joe: um what's the the um you've you've
• 1:09:34
  Joe: hurt your shoulder and you rub not like not deep heat or anything because that
• 1:09:38
  Joe: would be grim to put in oil and oil to put in lube um it's like a muscle thing
• 1:09:42
  Joe: that you rub in um volterol i want to say something like that yeah so he puts
• 1:09:47
  Joe: some of that in his lube he's like if i'm already doing that inside to get begin with like everyone
• 1:09:52
  Joe: has their own recipe yeah like.
• 1:09:55
  Craig: Certain notes around like clove oil particularly people use that because it
• 1:10:00
  Craig: is both a mild numbing agent but also a muscle relaxant in one,
• 1:10:07
  Craig: turns out that for certain people can massively increase the risk of not only
• 1:10:12
  Craig: bleeding but also hemorrhoids.
• 1:10:14
  Joe: Oh didn't know that i.
• 1:10:16
  Craig: Had a friend who found out that out the hard way it's not everyone it's like
• 1:10:19
  Craig: one of these weird genetic things like.
• 1:10:21
  Joe: Okay um.
• 1:10:23
  Craig: Some people find cilantro tastes like soap but like some people react that way
• 1:10:27
  Craig: to clove oil so you should be aware that is a possibility that can happen to you and you should check.
• 1:10:34
  Joe: Yeah definitely yeah um but you've
• 1:10:36
  Joe: got oil based you've got um so silicon based
• 1:10:39
  Joe: so like gun oil there's this so there's so many there's like
• 1:10:42
  Joe: silicon hybrids the silicon water hybrids that are
• 1:10:45
  Joe: better for certain things um and then water-based water-based
• 1:10:49
  Joe: you know they can dry out there's there's pros and cons for each one
• 1:10:52
  Joe: again it's a very personal preference um but the
• 1:10:54
  Joe: three biggies that everyone always talks about with j lube x lube
• 1:10:57
  Joe: k lube they are basically the same but they've got
• 1:11:00
  Joe: different ingredients um so j
• 1:11:04
  Joe: lube has got a lot of sugar in it um it's so dispersing agent
• 1:11:07
  Joe: is sucrose um so therefore it's likely to go
• 1:11:10
  Joe: off faster it doesn't last as long um k
• 1:11:14
  Joe: lube has preservatives in it um so it
• 1:11:17
  Joe: lasts longer but if you have a specific thing around sort of chemicals
• 1:11:20
  Joe: in your lube you don't want to use preservatives don't use that um x
• 1:11:23
  Joe: lube no preservatives has less sugar it's the one i use
• 1:11:26
  Joe: um again not sponsored not sponsored i
• 1:11:29
  Joe: have got all three of these lubes in my cupboard um i
• 1:11:32
  Joe: they're all pretty much the same in terms of sensation
• 1:11:35
  Joe: they're all you know they're a powder you put water in it
• 1:11:38
  Joe: um you mix it up in advanced it becomes very
• 1:11:41
  Joe: stringy and messy everywhere um but you
• 1:11:44
  Joe: find your preference you find a recipe that works for you you find um a
• 1:11:48
  Joe: thickness because you're making up yourself for those three um you
• 1:11:51
  Joe: find like the right thickness do you like yours really thick and globular do
• 1:11:55
  Joe: you like yours really watery which gets everywhere like you
• 1:11:58
  Joe: you just find what feels good inside you yeah um.
• 1:12:01
  Joe: And and it's like um again like
• 1:12:04
  Joe: we said earlier people putting clove oil people putting different things inside things
• 1:12:08
  Joe: just kind of keep a note of what you've put in in your
• 1:12:10
  Joe: lube when you made it um you'll find that a lot of
• 1:12:13
  Joe: these lubes over time will become more watery like they'll
• 1:12:16
  Joe: start to like the the lubricant properties of
• 1:12:19
  Joe: it will start to essentially disintegrate because it's been made and
• 1:12:22
  Joe: they don't last that long like i keep mine for a couple of
• 1:12:25
  Joe: weeks um by the end of it i'm like
• 1:12:27
  Joe: yeah it's it's it's not good anymore i need to throw it out um but
• 1:12:31
  Joe: another another another safety tip don't share your lubes um
• 1:12:35
  Joe: if you're playing with a partner have two
• 1:12:37
  Joe: bottles um and i say this because
• 1:12:40
  Joe: anyone anyone that's used fisting lube
• 1:12:43
  Joe: knows how difficult it is to handle
• 1:12:46
  Joe: so if you've had your hand inside someone for example and obviously your hand
• 1:12:54
  Joe: is covered in parts of them bacteria and things inside them and you are going
• 1:12:58
  Joe: back to the same loops you're usually putting the bottle close to it um the
• 1:13:02
  Joe: annoying thing with j lube is you squeeze it out and sometimes it goes back in.
• 1:13:07
  Joe: Yeah so if you're covering your hand in jail if you're covering
• 1:13:10
  Joe: if your hands are inside someone you're covering your hand in more lube and it kind of goes
• 1:13:13
  Joe: back into the bottle and you're sharing lubes there's another
• 1:13:15
  Joe: potential thing of of passing bits between each other um and i mean to be honest
• 1:13:20
  Joe: you're doing horrible things to each other anyway so there's a high chance you're
• 1:13:24
  Joe: gonna if you were going to catch something from a friend it's there but it's
• 1:13:28
  Joe: usually best practice to not share lubes to have your own lube made for yourself um and.
• 1:13:33
  Craig: Again going on to some darker on more unpleasant topics like chems some people
• 1:13:39
  Craig: do spike their lubes with chems.
• 1:13:41
  Joe: Oh i didn't know that yes.
• 1:13:44
  Craig: It has happened to a friend of mine where the person spiked their lubes with chems and.
• 1:13:51
  Joe: They did not.
• 1:13:52
  Craig: Tell their partner.
• 1:13:52
  Joe: Oh shit yes.
• 1:13:55
  Craig: Yeah which led to a very unpleasant sensation for them so again keep an eye
• 1:13:59
  Craig: on your lubes like do not share lubes.
• 1:14:02
  Joe: Yeah um didn't know that now i'm
• 1:14:05
  Joe: slightly horrified for future like i don't i don't tend to play it
• 1:14:07
  Joe: um big events i prefer more one-to-one yeah like at
• 1:14:11
  Joe: home comfy environments but um but good to know good to know for future um yeah
• 1:14:16
  Joe: that really and and as far as lubes so what's best there isn't like again everyone
• 1:14:22
  Joe: everyone finds their own one
• 1:14:23
  Joe: um but we touched on we touched on gloves so condom glove safety gloves,
• 1:14:29
  Joe: glove or gloveless, partly a personal preference.
• 1:14:33
  Joe: I've got a friend of mine that uses, he's into rubber as well,
• 1:14:37
  Joe: so has like really thick like rubber gloves.
• 1:14:41
  Joe: Can't stand it. For me, I don't like that sensation. For you, you might love it.
• 1:14:45
  Joe: You might be like, yeah, put on that, put on the thickest rubber you can find and shove it inside me.
• 1:14:49
  Joe: Like personal preference, but safety.
• 1:14:52
  Joe: So we talked about trimming nails, like sometimes,
• 1:14:56
  Joe: like if you've got like a hangnail if you've got like a little cut yeah split
• 1:15:00
  Joe: cuticles like maybe you don't want to put that inside someone where you might
• 1:15:03
  Joe: be making causing cuts with them cut plus cut equal is not a great idea um so
• 1:15:08
  Joe: gloves can be useful for that um also.
• 1:15:10
  Craig: Makes cleanup easier.
• 1:15:11
  Joe: It does make clean it easier um most people say nitrile gloves i was gonna say
• 1:15:17
  Joe: make sure you get my child gloves just uh in case someone has any allergies yeah.
• 1:15:22
  Craig: Because not everyone knows if they have a latex allergy.
• 1:15:24
  Joe: And a latex allergy inside yeah may
• 1:15:28
  Joe: feel very strange and not easily recognizable um but
• 1:15:32
  Joe: yeah gloves gloves are there's a safety element there's a preference
• 1:15:35
  Joe: element i prefer without gloves because it feels nicer but yeah
• 1:15:38
  Joe: if you're if your top has got cuts um hasn't cut
• 1:15:41
  Joe: their nails particularly well and you don't have a a nail file
• 1:15:44
  Joe: to hand i think every every fisting bottom tends
• 1:15:48
  Joe: to have a nail file he says looking to the side of his desk and seeing a nail
• 1:15:51
  Joe: file um yeah down there um everyone
• 1:15:54
  Joe: tends to bring one with them a little small something or something but um
• 1:15:57
  Joe: yeah gloves can gloves can be a good a good thing
• 1:16:00
  Joe: especially if you're going between partners if you're if you've got multiple
• 1:16:03
  Joe: partners or you're at play event making sure you switch gloves between people
• 1:16:08
  Joe: um a lot of this is common sense but sometimes people don't think about it especially
• 1:16:11
  Joe: when you're in the moment and you've got two hot bottoms in front of you and
• 1:16:15
  Joe: you're like oh let me just let me just switch this you know change your gloves between people.
• 1:16:22
  Joe: Um aha so i've got i've got on my list so this
• 1:16:25
  Joe: was a big thing i learned this year setting the mood
• 1:16:28
  Joe: so if you're
• 1:16:30
  Joe: playing with toys um or playing
• 1:16:34
  Joe: with partners if you're playing toys on your own though this is this was my experience i
• 1:16:37
  Joe: would always play in the bathroom so i was i would
• 1:16:40
  Joe: you know clean myself out uh have a little footstool
• 1:16:43
  Joe: um that puts the toy at a like a nice height
• 1:16:46
  Joe: for me so i don't have to squat so much um and
• 1:16:50
  Joe: i would go at it that is not a very sexy environment in
• 1:16:52
  Joe: there like just for just full stop um a fisting bottom friend of mine um is
• 1:16:59
  Joe: like oh i i have lights so i fully have like a light system i put on some music
• 1:17:04
  Joe: i get a big mirror so i can watch myself like the change like genuinely the change from,
• 1:17:11
  Joe: a very cold bathroom you know
• 1:17:14
  Joe: not a sexy environment to a sexy environment for how much i relaxed and how
• 1:17:18
  Joe: deeper and wider i got insane like genuinely just that change so setting the
• 1:17:24
  Joe: scene wherever you are if you're at home with a partner um put on music you
• 1:17:28
  Joe: like make it a comfortable environment like get clean up like if you've got a messy bedroom,
• 1:17:34
  Joe: like you can find that distracting so kind of setting the scene making it a sexy place to,
• 1:17:39
  Joe: relax into and stretch stretch yourself yeah.
• 1:17:41
  Craig: Like I will say so one of the ways counter to that is I found one of the best
• 1:17:47
  Craig: places and times for me to practice was having a shower,
• 1:17:52
  Craig: a because my neurosis was around mess like and.
• 1:17:55
  Joe: That made instant cleanup because.
• 1:17:57
  Craig: Everything washes away but also like sensation of hot steamy water and like
• 1:18:02
  Craig: i do put like candles in in my bathroom.
• 1:18:04
  Joe: So it's like up.
• 1:18:05
  Craig: Lit instead of.
• 1:18:06
  Joe: Harsh white bathroom.
• 1:18:07
  Craig: Light but yeah like that sort of warm hot shower makes my body relaxed instant
• 1:18:13
  Craig: cleanup means i don't have to worry about that again it's whatever works for you.
• 1:18:17
  Joe: Yeah experiment.
• 1:18:18
  Craig: Find what works for you.
• 1:18:20
  Joe: I i would say if you're doing this in in the
• 1:18:23
  Joe: bathroom and you're using j-lube x-lube and any
• 1:18:26
  Joe: sort of those really string yeah be careful uh
• 1:18:29
  Joe: adhesive ducts adhesive anything just to
• 1:18:32
  Joe: just if you get lube like you will know anyone
• 1:18:35
  Joe: that's worn rubber um yeah and you're getting every rubber from the shower and
• 1:18:39
  Joe: suddenly you almost kill yourself slip it up um imagine a bathroom covered in
• 1:18:44
  Joe: x-lube k-lube j-lube whatever like yeah it's slippery it's dangerous so be careful
• 1:18:49
  Joe: get a get a nice get a nice something to hold on to um but yeah fine work for you um oh.
• 1:18:54
  Craig: That just reminded me of a funny anecdote someone uh had a big toy with a suction
• 1:18:59
  Craig: cup on it and so they stuck it
• 1:19:01
  Craig: to the side of the shower just fucking themselves with it broke the tile.
• 1:19:05
  Joe: Oh on.
• 1:19:06
  Craig: The bathroom because the suction pulled out the tile and it cracked.
• 1:19:08
  Joe: It yeah oh no
• 1:19:12
  Joe: imagine this being that's your landlord like how did this break um yeah this
• 1:19:17
  Joe: is a very specific break how did this happen uh would you believe um a missile
• 1:19:23
  Joe: hit it yeah somewhere it was shaped like a missile anyway um but yeah i.
• 1:19:29
  Craig: Have someone with one that's shaped just like bullet bill from mario and they've.
• 1:19:33
  Joe: Stuck googly.
• 1:19:34
  Craig: Eyes on it now they don't use it.
• 1:19:36
  Joe: I i mean that like like kinky people are the worst but also the best for this
• 1:19:41
  Joe: yeah like um i've seen one that's shaped like an ear of corn yes you love corn
• 1:19:47
  Joe: why don't you fuck yourself with corn country.
• 1:19:50
  Craig: Boys make do.
• 1:19:51
  Joe: They do um there's anything you can imagine it probably has been made into a
• 1:19:56
  Joe: dildo i mean the the old old saying anything's a dildo if you're brave enough
• 1:20:00
  Joe: please don't stick things that aren't meant to go inside you inside you just
• 1:20:04
  Joe: for just massive statement to throw in there but um there are probably dildos
• 1:20:07
  Joe: that are designed that doesn't look like it,
• 1:20:10
  Joe: I mean there's loads of dildos like there's a lot there is a lot of dildos out there,
• 1:20:17
  Joe: yeah Korn Korn was one I was not expecting to see.
• 1:20:26
  Craig: I like the what they're still doing them i think but the ones themed around superheroes.
• 1:20:31
  Joe: So they were knocked off but there.
• 1:20:33
  Craig: Was a big veiny green one and there was.
• 1:20:35
  Joe: A web.
• 1:20:36
  Craig: Covered red and blue one.
• 1:20:38
  Joe: The hulk the hulk would get it yeah yeah me me
• 1:20:41
  Joe: is a me is a me and my stubby boy mode big
• 1:20:44
  Joe: muscle muscle daddy use me use those fists do you
• 1:20:47
  Joe: like big fists oh oh tangent but
• 1:20:50
  Joe: important thing um if you are new find someone
• 1:20:53
  Joe: with small hands genuinely find
• 1:20:57
  Joe: someone with small hands um i i
• 1:21:00
  Joe: just yeah cannot stress enough like i i even i
• 1:21:03
  Joe: say unfortunately absolutely love it i i have a
• 1:21:06
  Joe: strange knack for finding guys with absolute shovels for
• 1:21:09
  Joe: hands uh lovely lovely
• 1:21:12
  Joe: american daddy bear who didn't tell me he was into fisting i hadn't really prepared
• 1:21:19
  Joe: i prepared i hadn't really mentally prepared for fisting that day um and he
• 1:21:24
  Joe: yeah he was kind of going like get into business and i was like oh i mean how
• 1:21:28
  Joe: big are your hands like jesus christ.
• 1:21:31
  Joe: Um and he's like oh yeah i've never managed to very few people could
• 1:21:34
  Joe: take my hands i was like that's it challenge accepted come on just
• 1:21:38
  Joe: like squirting more loop on his hat and i'm like get in there um but
• 1:21:41
  Joe: yeah small hands small hands for newbies um scale
• 1:21:45
  Joe: up in hands have multiple partners that have different hand
• 1:21:48
  Joe: sizes oh and added sorry extra
• 1:21:51
  Joe: tangent yeah um so we talked about we talked
• 1:21:54
  Joe: about like top toys having that regimented um thing
• 1:21:57
  Joe: and a lot of a lot of fisting is mental um for
• 1:22:01
  Joe: me like as soon as it's gone in once unlocked like
• 1:22:04
  Joe: i i know i can take a fist but it's that
• 1:22:07
  Joe: it's in a session as soon as it's gone in once i relax straight away because
• 1:22:10
  Joe: i know it's gone in and out and i know i can do it um i
• 1:22:13
  Joe: have a friend that um uses the topped
• 1:22:16
  Joe: toys measuring system so he
• 1:22:20
  Joe: gets other he gets tops to measure their hands his way of unlocking his brain
• 1:22:26
  Joe: to know that he can take someone's hand is going your um your 9.2 inches centimeters
• 1:22:33
  Joe: around whatever it is um i can take a gatekeeper 93 therefore i can take your hand.
• 1:22:37
  Craig: No that works like so again
• 1:22:40
  Craig: going back to why i first started using toys uh to get over sort of my neuroses
• 1:22:45
  Craig: because i was like oh god i i'm not going to be able to perform i'm not going
• 1:22:48
  Craig: to be able to take a dick part of what got me over that is like i can take the
• 1:22:53
  Craig: 55 that's the average dick size i can take a 65 that's a really big dick i can like i can do this.
• 1:23:01
  Joe: It is is that mental block and i think um a lot of a lot of fisting especially that kind of,
• 1:23:08
  Joe: initial start um don't focus
• 1:23:11
  Joe: on the fist like yeah like a lot i i
• 1:23:14
  Joe: did this i was like i need to take a fist i need to take this
• 1:23:16
  Joe: and i lost i lost the enjoyment of like the
• 1:23:19
  Joe: progress to get there like it's the journey not the destination i
• 1:23:22
  Joe: know it sounds corny but um enjoy enjoy
• 1:23:26
  Joe: the sensations of getting there and that moment when it finally pops
• 1:23:29
  Joe: in at some point when your body and you're ready to do that um but yeah i think
• 1:23:35
  Joe: the the frustration mentally of focusing on i have to take the fist is a massive
• 1:23:39
  Joe: blocker to being able to take it so relaxation not focusing on the fist part
• 1:23:44
  Joe: just enjoying the sensation like.
• 1:23:47
  Craig: So much of this is mental like there's also stuff like hydration some days your
• 1:23:52
  Craig: body will just not perform like it should.
• 1:23:54
  Joe: Some days.
• 1:23:55
  Craig: Your whole won't be a stretchy but a lot of it is like if you find you're having
• 1:24:00
  Craig: difficulties pause take a break try and change your mindset and come back to it later.
• 1:24:05
  Joe: You'll find there can.
• 1:24:06
  Craig: Be a massive difference.
• 1:24:07
  Joe: I'm i'm gonna say i'm very similar in that some days i'm loosey-goosey completely
• 1:24:12
  Joe: like everything's easy and other days like even like my my starter like warm-up
• 1:24:18
  Joe: dildos i'm like why is this so difficult like why like yeah i've had a stressful
• 1:24:21
  Joe: day i've not eaten properly like so many factors,
• 1:24:26
  Joe: another another know your body statement you find you
• 1:24:28
  Joe: find days where it works and you hope that if you've planned a
• 1:24:31
  Joe: lovely meet with a lovely gentleman um that is going to
• 1:24:34
  Joe: be one of the good days but um but
• 1:24:37
  Joe: yeah um so i asked in preparation for this i asked some friends if you could
• 1:24:43
  Joe: because i was i we wrote you know we wrote some we wrote some topics i was like
• 1:24:47
  Joe: um and i apologize if you've seen the one after this the way it's worded um
• 1:24:51
  Joe: which we'll get to so i asked some friends i asked a group of gay friends and
• 1:24:55
  Joe: I ask a group of straight friends.
• 1:24:58
  Joe: What questions would you ask and i we already covered a lot of them yeah um
• 1:25:02
  Joe: a lot of silly questions you might imagine um anal orgasm came up so the get
• 1:25:07
  Joe: um the straights actually,
• 1:25:10
  Joe: which i found very interesting were like um i
• 1:25:13
  Joe: keep hearing about anal orgasms what is an anal orgasm and
• 1:25:15
  Joe: essentially it's a prostate orgasm you're the men's
• 1:25:18
  Joe: the male g-spot the prostate is you know easily accessible via
• 1:25:22
  Joe: via the butt wonderful thing pressing on it sensations on it you find what works
• 1:25:28
  Joe: for you vibrations just pressure um being absolutely rammed with dicks and hands
• 1:25:34
  Joe: you know um but i don't know craig have you experienced an anal orgasm before no it's something i.
• 1:25:40
  Craig: Really want to i have come close where like um a
• 1:25:44
  Craig: daddy was just literally just with two fingers massaging my prostate for like
• 1:25:48
  Craig: 20 minutes and i felt like i was right on the edge of one for like 10 whole
• 1:25:54
  Craig: minutes which asylf was amazing but i've never got to the point where i've had that full orgasm yet.
• 1:26:00
  Joe: So separating so a big thing i
• 1:26:03
  Joe: think people get confused with separating ejaculation with orgasm first
• 1:26:06
  Joe: and foremost um you can have an
• 1:26:09
  Joe: orgasm you can come without physically ejaculating coming um
• 1:26:13
  Joe: prostate orgasm was very similar and i i specifically remember pre-fisting the
• 1:26:17
  Joe: first time a lovely daddy who i still i still chat to this is back when i was
• 1:26:21
  Joe: i was like 9 18 19 um he he was um a nice size shall we say and a nice curve as well um and i.
• 1:26:32
  Joe: It felt it felt very much like a level of
• 1:26:35
  Joe: pressure in my entire body a very tingly pressure
• 1:26:38
  Joe: to the point that i thought my head was going to explode is
• 1:26:42
  Joe: the sensation i had to the point i asked him to stop because i didn't know what was going
• 1:26:45
  Joe: on like i just suddenly felt very like like tense
• 1:26:49
  Joe: very confusing for young joe um
• 1:26:52
  Joe: but now like it isn't it isn't
• 1:26:55
  Joe: that it isn't that kind of like hot release
• 1:26:58
  Joe: that you get for coming coming normally like it it
• 1:27:01
  Joe: isn't that it is very a full body intensity
• 1:27:06
  Joe: like i i get very like not twitchy but
• 1:27:09
  Joe: like spasmy um which tops
• 1:27:12
  Joe: apparently fucking love like i'm writhing on their hand um
• 1:27:16
  Joe: but it is that kind of it's a
• 1:27:19
  Joe: longer process it's not like a bang and done like it is a like a more drawn
• 1:27:24
  Joe: out physical sensation for me um i think it sounds like you were you were similar
• 1:27:30
  Joe: like you got close and it's that kind of pressure pressure kind of like oh this
• 1:27:34
  Joe: is this is a bit weird this is a bit different yeah.
• 1:27:38
  Craig: Yeah it's very hard to describe but it's sort of yeah it's not just concentrated
• 1:27:44
  Craig: to like in the same way like if you have a penis and you're working your penis
• 1:27:48
  Craig: it's just like like very concentrated to that area this is holistically throughout your body.
• 1:27:56
  Joe: Yeah um which is lovely um and added to that um uh you see this a lot in fisting
• 1:28:02
  Joe: porn as well um guys pissing themselves,
• 1:28:05
  Joe: um it's that full body kind of like over
• 1:28:09
  Joe: stimulation like i've pressed the nuclear button
• 1:28:12
  Joe: inside you and you are going to go boom um i
• 1:28:16
  Joe: think a lot of people get those sensations and they try and they
• 1:28:18
  Joe: try and like like they don't want to piss themselves for example again
• 1:28:22
  Joe: you don't have to be into water sports at all for this but i find
• 1:28:25
  Joe: i find a lot of it is you start
• 1:28:29
  Joe: feeling weird sensations like you're gonna
• 1:28:31
  Joe: piss yourself for example and you're like oh no i need to hold
• 1:28:34
  Joe: that like just just letting it go like with
• 1:28:39
  Joe: with kind of fisting and
• 1:28:42
  Joe: those sort of sensations like just just
• 1:28:45
  Joe: relax and let go let what happens happens i
• 1:28:49
  Joe: find is the best advice to look to kind of getting to that point not to focus
• 1:28:52
  Joe: on it again like taking a fist but you start feeling good if you feel like you're
• 1:28:56
  Joe: gonna piss yourself usually with fisting tops don't really mind if you're gonna
• 1:28:59
  Joe: piss yourself because they're kind of like i got you to do that of my hand that's
• 1:29:03
  Joe: pretty hot um put put towels down or a or a map i.
• 1:29:07
  Craig: Mean towels down for everything like.
• 1:29:08
  Joe: It is a messy thing it is a messy thing in.
• 1:29:10
  Craig: General like go like some people i know do sort of ejaculate when they're having
• 1:29:16
  Craig: a like anal orgasm but what they say is it's like it doesn't shoot out it just dribbles.
• 1:29:23
  Joe: Out because.
• 1:29:24
  Craig: Like they're soft and it just like and that itself is this weird unique sensation yeah.
• 1:29:29
  Joe: So i i've gone so on that sort of soft soft
• 1:29:33
  Joe: ejaculation i i've i this year
• 1:29:36
  Joe: been experiment experimenting with hypnosis and things but also
• 1:29:39
  Joe: kind of figuring out things about my body and um being
• 1:29:42
  Joe: able to come like that is is now a preferred way
• 1:29:45
  Joe: like i don't really want my day to be involved but being soft
• 1:29:48
  Joe: and coming like it's a very different sensation but it's very good um but yeah
• 1:29:56
  Joe: anal orgasms that they're they're very they're they are very different um if
• 1:30:00
  Joe: you feel if it feels intense it feels awesome when you get if you get to it
• 1:30:04
  Joe: um i hope everyone at some point in their lives gets to experience it because,
• 1:30:09
  Joe: it's very intense probably the most intense thing i think i've ever experienced,
• 1:30:15
  Joe: um and it's weird because sometimes you don't think you have come,
• 1:30:19
  Joe: i think i think especially men are very programmed to think ejaculation coming
• 1:30:23
  Joe: like yeah that specific sensation is an orgasm so you have this really intense
• 1:30:26
  Joe: sensation that you're like what the hell was like that was intense like that
• 1:30:30
  Joe: probably was an anal orgasm and you just didn't kind of click what was happening to you yeah like.
• 1:30:36
  Craig: I do wonder about like i said i was like on the verge of this thing and it's
• 1:30:39
  Craig: like wait was that the you know orgasm.
• 1:30:42
  Joe: I think it was oh i think that's
• 1:30:45
  Joe: interesting like it's like with orgasm normally
• 1:30:48
  Joe: you you get to the top and then you go over it like and you
• 1:30:51
  Joe: and you know whereas i for me anyway like anal
• 1:30:54
  Joe: orgasms are very intense all over
• 1:30:57
  Joe: like pressure is and i say pressure that sounds weird but
• 1:31:00
  Joe: like tingly oh i can't describe it it's really difficult i should have i should
• 1:31:07
  Joe: have googled anal orgasm just to get like distinct descriptions um maybe it
• 1:31:12
  Joe: was you know keep exploring you don't know yeah um i didn't i didn't put on
• 1:31:18
  Joe: this on this list um other questions about poop uh
• 1:31:22
  Joe: shit happens i think
• 1:31:26
  Joe: anyone anyone into fisting accepts this
• 1:31:29
  Joe: is this is a risk of the job um it it for the best people in the world sometimes
• 1:31:36
  Joe: this happens and it's a it's a case of usually at this point you're not very
• 1:31:41
  Joe: squeamish you just go okay cool you might want to just go and don't make a big
• 1:31:45
  Joe: thing of it you might want to just pop in the shower get yourself sorted wash
• 1:31:48
  Joe: your hands clean yourself up.
• 1:31:49
  Craig: Yeah you do have to get and again this is one of the things i've really struggled
• 1:31:54
  Craig: with is you just have to get comfortable with the possibility that it's going to be there.
• 1:31:58
  Joe: Yeah i i'm similar in that i'm
• 1:32:01
  Joe: a i'm a clean freak when it comes to douching like i
• 1:32:04
  Joe: and i historically was
• 1:32:07
  Joe: very um very uptight about it like it
• 1:32:10
  Joe: made me very uncomfortable and i was very like i
• 1:32:13
  Joe: was very nervous about having that happen in the
• 1:32:15
  Joe: bedroom um a lot of shame a lot of embarrassment kind
• 1:32:18
  Joe: of attached to it whereas i mean i'm not into scat like
• 1:32:21
  Joe: again no king shaming here but um it's now
• 1:32:26
  Joe: i'm like if it happens it happens i think i've done a good enough job for some
• 1:32:30
  Joe: fun times but if it happens i'm i'm hopeful my top that i'm with will be very
• 1:32:34
  Joe: like oh uh a friend of mine calls them visitors oh we got a visitor uh you might
• 1:32:39
  Joe: have popped to the shower quickly and i'm like cool like yeah.
• 1:32:41
  Craig: It's like if you're a top in that situation don't be an arsehole.
• 1:32:45
  Joe: Yeah like yeah shit happens
• 1:32:48
  Joe: shit happens is the phrase um and the
• 1:32:51
  Joe: the gaze the gaze question uh my friend just went what about baggy vag oh my
• 1:32:58
  Joe: god baggy vag and i i just thought i can't believe you've uttered those words
• 1:33:02
  Joe: to me um so the common the common belief if you were into fisting you are very loose not true,
• 1:33:12
  Joe: um whole control is a
• 1:33:15
  Joe: thing if you were into fisting as a bottom you usually
• 1:33:19
  Joe: have pretty good control of various sphincter muscles that
• 1:33:21
  Joe: the standard person has not even mentally connected
• 1:33:25
  Joe: to um on the
• 1:33:28
  Joe: flip side if you were going elbow deep every single day
• 1:33:31
  Joe: chances are you're going to be a little
• 1:33:34
  Joe: bit looser than other people if you've been doing it for decades and
• 1:33:37
  Joe: as you get older and your body muscle tone
• 1:33:41
  Joe: starts at tier eight there is there is always that potential but for the bog
• 1:33:44
  Joe: standard person who does this from time to time like not every day like yeah
• 1:33:52
  Joe: it's not baggy yeah i can i can be very relaxed i can i can loosen up very quickly
• 1:33:57
  Joe: i can tighten up very quickly um like.
• 1:34:01
  Craig: And again if you're really worried about that uh start incorporating kegel exercises.
• 1:34:06
  Joe: Oh into your.
• 1:34:07
  Craig: Routine again it's just like going back to the sort of yoga and gym analogy
• 1:34:12
  Craig: it's just how you train your muscles.
• 1:34:14
  Joe: Um my uh like lovely
• 1:34:18
  Joe: daddy i was gonna say my love uh my love one of one of one of
• 1:34:21
  Joe: my my little group of daddies my little harem of daddies i've got um
• 1:34:24
  Joe: we're doing uh my muscle connections um so
• 1:34:28
  Joe: learning how to so for example i can
• 1:34:31
  Joe: i can bounce my pecs which is lovely and fun i couldn't do that years ago because
• 1:34:37
  Joe: i didn't connect my mind to that people that can move their ears people that
• 1:34:41
  Joe: can flare their nostrils like sometimes you just naturally have it sometimes
• 1:34:45
  Joe: you have to really kind of like doing that with your tongue um yeah you kind of fold.
• 1:34:50
  Craig: Your tongue yeah.
• 1:34:51
  Joe: It's getting those attachments to muscles like your your sort
• 1:34:53
  Joe: of pelvic floor muscles understanding the different parts so the back part of
• 1:34:58
  Joe: flexing your hole and flexing the front part that's your dick um understanding
• 1:35:03
  Joe: those connections with kegel exercises and finding being able to flex specific
• 1:35:09
  Joe: muscles is a very fun and sometimes frustrating challenge yeah.
• 1:35:13
  Craig: I mean there is a note i think uh to touch on here which one thing that really
• 1:35:18
  Craig: put me off fisting for a long time is a lot of people in fisting fantasize and fetishize about quote
• 1:35:27
  Craig: -unquote, destroying someone's hole.
• 1:35:30
  Joe: Yes.
• 1:35:31
  Craig: Like, I mean, I...
• 1:35:34
  Craig: Personally i'm very turned off by sort of the prolapsing porn which again no
• 1:35:40
  Craig: judgment whatever people are into
• 1:35:41
  Craig: but for me that's one of the things that kind of steers me away from it.
• 1:35:47
  Joe: Yeah the whole that was okay so i'm the
• 1:35:50
  Joe: flip side on this so like obviously i do
• 1:35:52
  Joe: not want a top to destroy in in
• 1:35:55
  Joe: the in the definition destroy so it
• 1:35:58
  Joe: no longer functions i do not want that i don't think anyone really
• 1:36:01
  Joe: wants anyone to you know stretch me
• 1:36:05
  Joe: so far open destroy my destroy my pussy like you
• 1:36:08
  Joe: know it's again it's that that mental terminology.
• 1:36:12
  Joe: And phrasing that gets you off so being like
• 1:36:15
  Joe: punch-fisted and you're like fucking destroy my pussy
• 1:36:18
  Joe: like it's hot in the moment to say
• 1:36:21
  Joe: that yeah i am not asking you to you know get out
• 1:36:24
  Joe: tools of destruction get a chainsaw out and go go ham
• 1:36:27
  Joe: on the pussy like don't do that um but you know it
• 1:36:30
  Joe: um and you said prolapse and i
• 1:36:33
  Joe: like medically obviously that's not
• 1:36:36
  Joe: good prolapsing isn't good again this is the extreme big
• 1:36:39
  Joe: steam end of the spectrum and i look at people like hunger fistfuck who
• 1:36:42
  Joe: is the hunger ff who is who is
• 1:36:45
  Joe: the king of prolapse in my brain who i definitely
• 1:36:48
  Joe: haven't watched videos of his many many times um
• 1:36:52
  Joe: but but i think he again he's very
• 1:36:55
  Joe: i think he's very open about kind of his body his
• 1:36:58
  Joe: experiences um like he
• 1:37:00
  Joe: doesn't he doesn't fetishize it and i think i think that's part
• 1:37:03
  Joe: of the problem with a lot of kinks but fisting in particular i think
• 1:37:06
  Joe: like prolapsing rosebuds um so
• 1:37:09
  Joe: showing some of your intestinal lining sorry to be great to be clinical but
• 1:37:13
  Joe: showing your intestinal lining being pushed out um i think i think is fetishized
• 1:37:18
  Joe: as this really hot goal and i think when people think of their horny brain like
• 1:37:24
  Joe: i can think about prolapsing and rosebuds with my horny brain and i think it can be quite hot.
• 1:37:29
  Joe: But on my on the non-horny brain going like but
• 1:37:33
  Joe: it's not the best for your body like you know your muscle
• 1:37:36
  Joe: you know your intestines shouldn't be out they should be in yeah stretch
• 1:37:39
  Joe: them to stretch them to the limit that they can stretch um
• 1:37:42
  Joe: and it is finding it's finding the balance of
• 1:37:46
  Joe: like like when you're fisting if you get really into
• 1:37:49
  Joe: fisting um you know you're loosening
• 1:37:52
  Joe: part of part of it is changing kind
• 1:37:55
  Joe: of those muscles in your rectum like the the sort of
• 1:37:58
  Joe: muscles around your rectum obviously getting stretched um so
• 1:38:01
  Joe: they can you know they can pop out they can you can
• 1:38:04
  Joe: rosebuds um i think
• 1:38:07
  Joe: people there are people that actively search for
• 1:38:10
  Joe: that like they actively pursue it so rosebud
• 1:38:13
  Joe: pumps for example um and i
• 1:38:15
  Joe: think you can do anything like you can if you want to get into that get into
• 1:38:18
  Joe: that but understand the risks attached to it understand the limits of your own
• 1:38:21
  Joe: body and kind of accept them so the same with anything like if you if you smoke
• 1:38:26
  Joe: cigars like i smoke cigars in a
• 1:38:27
  Joe: fetish sense so like i know the health the health risks of smoking cigars.
• 1:38:34
  Joe: I don't smoke cigars very often and the same i think with
• 1:38:36
  Joe: this like i probably do rosebud a little bit at
• 1:38:39
  Joe: this point i'm not i'm not as much as
• 1:38:42
  Joe: i think it's it's the the horny brain thinks
• 1:38:45
  Joe: it's hot um i i still have my like i don't
• 1:38:48
  Joe: want to go so far that i'm gonna have issues down the
• 1:38:51
  Joe: line but again everyone has to take their own make their
• 1:38:54
  Joe: own sort of assessment on risk what they're happy with what they're
• 1:38:57
  Joe: aiming for just anyone that's like really fetishizing sort
• 1:39:00
  Joe: of prolapses and rosebuds i think great but also similar to earlier have a think
• 1:39:06
  Joe: about why you're doing that um have a think about what that means in reality
• 1:39:10
  Joe: and if you want to go for it yeah fully support you go for it get those rosebud
• 1:39:13
  Joe: pumps like make a training regimen like every night that you're doing things
• 1:39:17
  Joe: but also understand the risks attached to that what you're doing to your.
• 1:39:23
  Craig: And again it's it's not like inevitable you can train your body in ways that
• 1:39:28
  Craig: don't do this so like don't think well i'd like to but this element of it puts
• 1:39:33
  Craig: me off it's like you have options.
• 1:39:35
  Joe: And i think i think as well with partners um it's
• 1:39:39
  Joe: part of that sort of scene negotiation as well so i obviously destroy my destroy
• 1:39:43
  Joe: my whole um rosebud prolapse that sort of thing yeah um there probably will
• 1:39:48
  Joe: be times where you meet tops that they want that like they think it's really
• 1:39:52
  Joe: hot but it's not their body yeah and i think it's really i think it's really important that.
• 1:39:58
  Joe: You set your boundaries what you're comfortable with um if
• 1:40:02
  Joe: you find a top kind of like is
• 1:40:06
  Joe: is talking about prolapsing and rose buzz if you're not happy with
• 1:40:08
  Joe: it just just say it come out and say it if they
• 1:40:11
  Joe: if they get rc and weird probably
• 1:40:15
  Joe: wouldn't best to fist with them anyway um if someone goes
• 1:40:18
  Joe: okay fair enough um well you know this fisting
• 1:40:21
  Joe: is doesn't have to be about that um but horny
• 1:40:25
  Joe: brains tops horny brain turning on in the moment of you
• 1:40:28
  Joe: know push push that rose bud out like you know
• 1:40:32
  Joe: another person's fantasies being pushed onto your body it's your body you should
• 1:40:36
  Joe: decide what you want to do with it and what you're comfortable with so um yeah
• 1:40:40
  Joe: definitely definitely kind of set those boundaries early if you think if a top's
• 1:40:44
  Joe: talking about that sort of thing kind of setting up what you're into and if
• 1:40:47
  Joe: they're like if you if it's like a verse,
• 1:40:50
  Joe: you know if it's like a very switch kind of fisting fisting session um the other
• 1:40:55
  Joe: the other fister may may like that themselves and by all means lead into it
• 1:41:00
  Joe: get them to push out you know um but it's just saying what you're comfortable with and going with that.
• 1:41:07
  Craig: Yeah and it like again that really
• 1:41:10
  Craig: sort of encapsulates all of this it's like this is
• 1:41:14
  Craig: mostly about exploring your body and like with
• 1:41:17
  Craig: a partner or alone like you can be
• 1:41:19
  Craig: unlock some incredibly intense sensations and unique things but like you have
• 1:41:25
  Craig: to work a while at it again this is the extreme end of sports you are doing
• 1:41:28
  Craig: something extreme with your body so do be aware of that but it's like the process
• 1:41:34
  Craig: of finding out can be incredibly fun yeah.
• 1:41:37
  Joe: I think um like my my secret my secret like thing that i love i fucking love
• 1:41:45
  Joe: hearing straight guys getting into anal.
• 1:41:49
  Joe: I think there was there was being being the
• 1:41:52
  Joe: ones being penetrated yeah fucking i fucking love like genuinely there was a
• 1:41:56
  Joe: guy it was a guy on x um twitter x etc um in the past and he was such a skilled
• 1:42:03
  Joe: fisting bottom like like g like i i am like to the point i am envious of his skills.
• 1:42:09
  Joe: And i was like oh this is really hot this is really hot and then there was
• 1:42:12
  Joe: a post where he was um i think his girlfriend was
• 1:42:15
  Joe: fisting him and i just you
• 1:42:18
  Joe: know i was like that's a what like that's
• 1:42:21
  Joe: a lady like what um and then he someone
• 1:42:24
  Joe: someone asked him about it and he was like oh yeah i'm straight i
• 1:42:27
  Joe: fucking love my whole being absolutely like stretched to oblivion um
• 1:42:31
  Joe: by like girls i'm not interested in in being fucked
• 1:42:34
  Joe: like that i don't like dicks i don't like men um
• 1:42:37
  Joe: i i i like you know women
• 1:42:40
  Joe: femme people like i want but i'm into this um and
• 1:42:43
  Joe: i've got i've got some straight friends i because i'm a
• 1:42:46
  Joe: very open person i talk about sex things very freely
• 1:42:49
  Joe: um with everyone my mother even my
• 1:42:53
  Joe: mother i have had conversations of a fisting of my mother we are
• 1:42:56
  Joe: very open um but i i absolutely
• 1:42:59
  Joe: love when a straight friend will be talking and he'll
• 1:43:02
  Joe: be like oh you know my my girlfriend's put like four fingers in me and i'm like
• 1:43:05
  Joe: four fingers like excuse me um i'm like well done like finding finding your
• 1:43:11
  Joe: g-spot like good for you girl um but yeah finding finding straight guys that
• 1:43:16
  Joe: are into into anal as a bomb genuinely just fucking love yeah i love hearing about it.
• 1:43:21
  Craig: Pegging has become a really popular term it's having a bit of a cultural moment
• 1:43:26
  Craig: and it's like i remember like hearing a bisexual friend who um really into fisting
• 1:43:32
  Craig: uh his like long-term relationship is uh with a woman and he got her into fisting him.
• 1:43:40
  Joe: Nice and.
• 1:43:41
  Craig: It's like like she loves it now and it's like opening up these doors.
• 1:43:44
  Joe: I just i just think it's cool like like i
• 1:43:48
  Joe: i feel really bad i feel
• 1:43:51
  Joe: really bad for straight people no i um i i feel really bad for like uh i don't
• 1:43:55
  Joe: want to say repressed it sounds really negative but um i think like heteronormative
• 1:44:00
  Joe: spaces yeah where they're like like this is this is the cookie cutter of what
• 1:44:04
  Joe: a relationship is what a sex life is um and like i i think a lot of the times i hear about,
• 1:44:11
  Joe: sort of again i love this tangent um like straight people like you know relationships
• 1:44:16
  Joe: ending because the guy was into being having his ball stepped on by you know
• 1:44:21
  Joe: high heels and he felt too embarrassed to go to his partner and say hey honey
• 1:44:25
  Joe: can you wear these heels and hit me with this brush please,
• 1:44:29
  Joe: it genuinely makes me sad that there's that kind of.
• 1:44:33
  Joe: Like they cannot explore i'm very i'm very thankful and
• 1:44:36
  Joe: like sort of queer gay spaces like non-heteronormative spaces
• 1:44:39
  Joe: that we can kind of have these absolute moments
• 1:44:43
  Joe: of depravity and exploration and finding wonderful things
• 1:44:47
  Joe: that you never thought existed um so hearing so it's
• 1:44:50
  Joe: just my it's my little my little guilty pleasure like hearing straight
• 1:44:53
  Joe: people especially when friends come out with stuff where i'm like no
• 1:44:57
  Joe: like really like i i'm so happy
• 1:45:00
  Joe: for them and i usually end up giving them tips um like full
• 1:45:04
  Joe: conversations in front of my friend and his now
• 1:45:07
  Joe: wife about um what lube to use um
• 1:45:11
  Joe: i don't know it was awesome like it just
• 1:45:13
  Joe: it just like it doesn't happen very often and i just
• 1:45:16
  Joe: love i love seeing people and this is this isn't just straight people
• 1:45:19
  Joe: i love seeing people just generally exploring something and
• 1:45:22
  Joe: finding the pleasure they can have and even if it's something i don't like i
• 1:45:25
  Joe: just love seeing people kind of explore that space and kind of go oh
• 1:45:29
  Joe: i didn't know i didn't know i had this um like like
• 1:45:31
  Joe: like women in the bedroom obviously the cookie cutter stereotype they get fucked
• 1:45:36
  Joe: it's the it's the submissive position women finding their sort of dominant side
• 1:45:41
  Joe: and husbands going i absolutely love being submissive to my wife and the same
• 1:45:46
  Joe: for fisting like women going i absolutely love pegging my husband i'm like yes.
• 1:45:51
  Joe: Let me give you some toy suggestions what harness are you using what leaves
• 1:45:55
  Joe: you what do you like have you have you got have you have you um shown him poppers
• 1:45:58
  Joe: yet like it's stuff like that but i love i love people seeing and exploring
• 1:46:02
  Joe: experience the joy that we get to experience.
• 1:46:05
  Craig: Yeah no that is awesome i love that,
• 1:46:10
  Craig: So, sadly, it does seem like we're coming up to time. We're almost,
• 1:46:14
  Craig: oh gosh, we're running into one hour and 45 minutes.
• 1:46:16
  Joe: We love to talk.
• 1:46:17
  Craig: Yes. So this has been an amazing talk. Like, obviously, like,
• 1:46:22
  Craig: you can go into depth, but more of this topic.
• 1:46:25
  Joe: Hey, you.
• 1:46:27
  Craig: Yeah, I'm so bad for puns.
• 1:46:29
  Joe: I was like, should I record puns? Should I write down the puns?
• 1:46:35
  Craig: But yeah, if people want to talk to you more and find out more, where can they find you?
• 1:46:38
  Joe: Okay, I apologize. i i have various forms i
• 1:46:41
  Joe: i did for a while have a very standard name so
• 1:46:44
  Joe: big boy joe on blue sky joven e jo is
• 1:46:48
  Joe: the the feminine spelling sorry triggered triggered from
• 1:46:51
  Joe: work um so big boy joe or big boy
• 1:46:54
  Joe: joe uk um on blue sky
• 1:46:56
  Joe: and fetlife as i'm exploring fetlife more mixed events
• 1:46:59
  Joe: are all fun um and then sort of um recon instagram
• 1:47:03
  Joe: homo joe homo joe uk on insta um yeah feel free to come ask me questions um
• 1:47:09
  Joe: send me nudes all the usual things that we love to see um i'm always happy to
• 1:47:14
  Joe: help and answer questions i'm filthy in all sorts of ways so if it's not fisting
• 1:47:18
  Joe: and you see him into something else come say hi um yeah i can tell you're.
• 1:47:22
  Craig: A lovely guy.
• 1:47:23
  Joe: Oh likewise i i try though i try to be lovely so.
• 1:47:28
  Craig: Yeah and uh listeners if you wish to write
• 1:47:31
  Craig: in or ask questions or give topic suggestions we are
• 1:47:34
  Craig: kinky boys pod on blue sky at macedon uh
• 1:47:38
  Craig: we're not really monitoring the twitter anymore that's probably going to go
• 1:47:41
  Craig: soon uh you can email in at uh kinkyboyspodcast at gmail.com or our website
• 1:47:47
  Craig: kinkyboyspodcast.com so yeah as always listeners have fun and play safe.