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The Tiny Spanish Town That Went To War With France For 100 Years · Ridiculous History

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  Speaker 1: Ridiculous History is a production of I Heart Radio. Ye.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the show, Ridiculous Historians. Thank you so much
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: for tuning in. Let's start today show with a question.
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  Speaker 1: What's the what's the strangest grudge you've ever held? Or
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: what's the longest time you've ever held a grudge? Hi,
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: I'm Ben, that's our that's our super producer, Casey Pegram. Hello,
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: it's time, gentlemen. Whoa wait what Jonathan Strickland a k a.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: The Quister. Hang on, Casey, were you were you alerted
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: to this? I can swear I was not in on
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: this bend. This is this is unprecedented. Oh man, Okay,
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: So honestly, I I'm even confused why I'm here. You're
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: usually at the at the end of the episode. You know,
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: I'm still really struggling with daylight saving. I know it's
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: been a while, but like, um, yeah, So here's the thing.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: I have this long standing grudge with Noel Brown. You
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: know you know this. Yeah, you're familiar with that, right right. Well,
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: I'm here now and he's not. That's true. That's true.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: My pal Noel is on some adventures. He'll be returning.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: Uh and Jonathan Strickland or the Quister. I don't know.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: I never know. I'm just gonna be Jonathan. Okay, I
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: could give you a quister segment, but it's just you,
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: and you already know how that's gonna go. I'll play
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: roper scissors with yourself. I don't know why I said
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: rock pipper scissors, but you're just you're overcome with the
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  Speaker 1: enormity in the situation before you, the magnitude gravity of this. Yes,
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  Speaker 1: so today, Jonathan, you are not playing your award winning
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: recurring role as the award adjacent award adjason. It's an
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: honor to be nominated, and I think someone saying something
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: about an award it's like a nomination. But you're going
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: to be here as yourself. You are our guest host
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: today and you and I were talking about this a
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: little bit off air. Today's episode is about a grudge. Yeah, Yeah,
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: it's about a grudge. It's the kind of grudge where
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  Speaker 1: one person is taking it very seriously and the other
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  Speaker 1: person is completely unaware that the first person even exists.
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  Speaker 1: This this story is the historical equivalent if I announced
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  Speaker 1: that I was in a deep personal feud with Robert
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: Downey Jr. Who doesn't even know I exist, and if
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  Speaker 1: he did, wouldn't care. Yes, yeah, that's I think that's
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  Speaker 1: an apt comparison. Speaking Robert town Jr. It also reminds
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: me a bit of that line in an Avengers movie
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  Speaker 1: where one of the characters they think it's like the
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  Speaker 1: Scarlet Witch or something that's talking to Thanos this is
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  Speaker 1: not a big spoiler, and it's like, you took everything
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  Speaker 1: from you ruined my life. And then Thanos goes, I
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  Speaker 1: don't know who you are. No, that's that is what
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  Speaker 1: we're talking about here, except in the case of an
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  Speaker 1: entire country and a teeny tiny town in Spain. Yes, yes,
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  Speaker 1: now I you know. You know me man. We've known
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  Speaker 1: each other for a number of years now, a scary
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  Speaker 1: number of years. I've always been a very much fight
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  Speaker 1: the power kind of guy, and like most people, like
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  Speaker 1: many people, I cheer for the underdog. This is a
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  Speaker 1: little bit of a different situation because our underdog here
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  Speaker 1: is the only one a where that there is any
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  Speaker 1: kind of struggle. Right, there's there's no beef except in
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  Speaker 1: this teeny tiny town, right Like it's so not only
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  Speaker 1: is it a teeny tinytown in Spain. Before we get
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  Speaker 1: into the details. Is a t tiny town in Spain
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  Speaker 1: that in no way, shape or form borders France, which
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  Speaker 1: would be the country with which this teeny tiny town
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  Speaker 1: in Spain had labeled France as their arch nemesis and
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  Speaker 1: then and it was a formal at least in this
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  Speaker 1: teeny tiny town, it was a formal, uh state of
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  Speaker 1: affairs for a century. Yep, that is that is the case.
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  Speaker 1: So when did this start to tell you the story?
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  Speaker 1: We're going to have to introduce you to a king,
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  Speaker 1: Spanish King Alfonso twelve. Yes, so Alfonso the twelve. This
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  Speaker 1: isn't This is an odd part of history already that
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  Speaker 1: we want to set up because you have to understand
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  Speaker 1: where Spain was in order to kind of get in
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  Speaker 1: appreciation for what led into this crazy feud. Alright, So,
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  Speaker 1: Alfonso the twelve was son of Queen Isabella the second.
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  Speaker 1: Queen Isabella the Second also had a nickname. She was
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  Speaker 1: known as the one with the sad destinies. That's not,
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  Speaker 1: as far as nicknames go, not a great one, right,
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  Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's no la bush. So so Ferdinand
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  Speaker 1: the seventh was her dad. Fernand the seven had no
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  Speaker 1: male heirs. He had a daughter Isabella. And at the
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  Speaker 1: time there were two very opposing lines of thought in Spain.
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  Speaker 1: One said that the the issue of a king, whether
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  Speaker 1: male or female, has first right to the throne, and
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  Speaker 1: the other said, no, no, no, it has to go
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: to a dude. No, no women allowed, only dudes. It
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: was the dude bro code of the medieval era Medieaval
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: to Renaissance era. So Ferdinand the seventh didn't have a son,
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: has a daughter, and he he's getting sick. He actually
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: before his child was born, he was getting sick, so
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: he was worried about what was going to happen. He
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  Speaker 1: quickly essentially signed into law this agreement that whom ever
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  Speaker 1: was born would become the monarch. H Meanwhile, he had
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  Speaker 1: a brother, carl Yeah, Carlos. So you had these different
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  Speaker 1: groups in Spain when Isabella the second becomes the monarch,
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  Speaker 1: who were in disagreement about whether or not she was
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  Speaker 1: the true monarch of Spain or whether Carlos should have
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  Speaker 1: been the monarch of Spain. And so you had Carlists.
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  Speaker 1: As you have these two opposing groups, this leads up
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  Speaker 1: to a big revolution, the glorious Revolution of eighteen sixty eight.
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  Speaker 1: As I recall Spain. By the way, lousy were revolutions.
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  Speaker 1: It's very hard to keep them all all in line.
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  Speaker 1: Isabel the second ends up essentially abdicating her throne, and
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  Speaker 1: over time, after they are unable to find a monarch
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  Speaker 1: suitable to lead Spain in this constitutional monarchy, they end
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  Speaker 1: up landing on Alfonso twelve, which is interesting to me
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  Speaker 1: because after all that at or all this struggle and
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: all this you know, uncertainty, it didn't sound like this
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  Speaker 1: was their number one pick. It was literally, we can't
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  Speaker 1: find someone suitable to stand in as the monarch for
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  Speaker 1: this country, and Alfonso the twelfth ends up being the
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  Speaker 1: best pick out of the group. In fact, there were
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  Speaker 1: several who were worried that maybe his mother would be
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  Speaker 1: domineering and still control the throne from behind him. He's
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  Speaker 1: kind of a product of compromise, right, but he would
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  Speaker 1: end up overseeing Spain during times of relative stability and peace.
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  Speaker 1: There were occasional attempts on his life. I mean, you're
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  Speaker 1: you're to expect that, right, But overall, Spain was in
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  Speaker 1: a much more stable place while he was king. Not
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  Speaker 1: that not necessarily through any direct effort on his part,
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  Speaker 1: but it happened to be Yeah. Yeah, so this is
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  Speaker 1: this is an important point though, because his reign was
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  Speaker 1: not very long, this period of stability, I think it's
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  Speaker 1: it's fair to say it was a period of less instability,
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  Speaker 1: and so people started to feel a little optimistic. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: there were it was. It was relatively stable. I think
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  Speaker 1: it's the best way of putting it. Yeah, he he
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  Speaker 1: raged for a little more than ten years in eighteen
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  Speaker 1: seventy four. And uh, you wouldn't like. The reason why
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  Speaker 1: we're even I'm even bringing this up is on on
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  Speaker 1: first blush, it doesn't seem like the kind of guy
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  Speaker 1: that a little town would be so supportive of that
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  Speaker 1: they would be deeply, deeply offended, were this this king
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  Speaker 1: of theirs, to be shown any sort of semblance of disrespect.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, so okay, so done an excellent job walking
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  Speaker 1: us through how Alphonso got to where he was. At
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  Speaker 1: the time, there was just relatively tranquil political scene in
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  Speaker 1: Spain and they had these two big problems, right they
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  Speaker 1: wanted to and the civil war that the that the
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  Speaker 1: car List were powering, right, and that would continue, by
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  Speaker 1: the way, all the way up till nineteen or so. Yes,
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  Speaker 1: I mean, like it's recent when the car Lists were
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  Speaker 1: no longer an active sort of faction in Spain. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: they were still in play while many of the people
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  Speaker 1: listening to this show were alive. Yes, so hey, maybe
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  Speaker 1: there is a former car List listening today. What do
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  Speaker 1: you think the odds are there? I mean, that's the
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: odds are cold. Other than casey um, you know, there's
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  Speaker 1: a super producer and there's others who are more like
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  Speaker 1: the were, more of the Bourbon side. But whatever, yeah, yeah,
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  Speaker 1: I mean to each their own right. So despite the
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  Speaker 1: fact that it's a pretty tranquil ray and it comes from,
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  Speaker 1: as you said, very disorganized, unstable place. So the civil
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  Speaker 1: war isn't settled until two years into the reign of
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  Speaker 1: Alphonso in eighteen seventy six. Uh. They've also they eventually
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  Speaker 1: established peace in Cuba after the Ten Years War, so
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: we can we can trace Alfonso's reign is I'm going
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  Speaker 1: to say he didn't seem like a terrible person. No, No,
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  Speaker 1: he was. I think I think as far as monarchs
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  Speaker 1: in Europe go, uh yeah, not not depth, not bad.
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  Speaker 1: But is that the best yard stick by which he
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  Speaker 1: like to measure people. We've got a lot of examples
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  Speaker 1: are really bad marks in Europe. So I know, I
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  Speaker 1: just think the bar is so low. That's fair, it's
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  Speaker 1: kind of an insult if I was like, Jonathan, you
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  Speaker 1: know what, You're not as bad as some royalty. Thanks right. Well,
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  Speaker 1: you also got to remember that that this is from
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  Speaker 1: a family where his u his grandmother was also his
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  Speaker 1: cousin once removed. Like, yeah, it's a little complicated, but
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  Speaker 1: but more to the point. So he's doing his kingly duties,
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  Speaker 1: which include visiting other countries, and this is what leads
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  Speaker 1: us in to the precipitating event that would cause this
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  Speaker 1: teeny tiny town in Spain to declare war upon the
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  Speaker 1: entire country. He goes to France, specifically, he's going to Paris,
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  Speaker 1: and he's touring Paris and he is mobbed by Parisians
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  Speaker 1: eight three exactly. So in eighteen eighty three, he gets
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  Speaker 1: mobbed by Parisians and uh, apparently the story goes someone
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  Speaker 1: through a rock at him, and uh, the other stories
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  Speaker 1: go that the reason that the rock was thrown was
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  Speaker 1: that this was a crime of fashion, that he was
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  Speaker 1: wearing a particularly ostentatious hat that the Parisian mob took
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  Speaker 1: offense to. Man. You know, people used to care so
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: much more about hats. A while back on this show,
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: we did, uh. We did an episode on the straw
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  Speaker 1: hat riots in New York. Uh and also in France
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  Speaker 1: and particularly in Paris. Actually uh we explored riots that
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  Speaker 1: occurred when waiters were not allowed to have facial hair
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  Speaker 1: servers restaurants. So you know, I just I guess it's
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  Speaker 1: a different vibe there. Like I said, crime of fashion,
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  Speaker 1: crime of fashion, fashion and passion. Those are the two
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  Speaker 1: crimes in France. It's the only two they recognize. You
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: are you are knocking it out of the park with
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  Speaker 1: the quotables today. You know, I've been there. No, So
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  Speaker 1: this this was the story gets back to Spain. Yes,
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  Speaker 1: we get to this teeny tiny town um lehar I
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  Speaker 1: believe is what is the name of it? Yeah, l
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  Speaker 1: I j A R. This is. This is in the
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  Speaker 1: mountains in Spain. Yeah, about eight hundred kilometers away from
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  Speaker 1: the border of France. Right as you said, it is
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  Speaker 1: no no border with France. And it does have a mayor,
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  Speaker 1: the whole boy the Terror of the Sierra. So this
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  Speaker 1: this mayor, Don Miguel Garcia says, yes, this mayor. Mayor says,
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  Speaker 1: here's about this and he says, essentially it is head.
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  Speaker 1: He says something along the lines of that's the last
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  Speaker 1: straw with the French, with these bastards. How dare where
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  Speaker 1: do you get off the stones that you threw at
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  Speaker 1: our king? So on October three a day that will
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  Speaker 1: live in for me, not infamy, just it's just it's
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  Speaker 1: regular day that will live in for me. Uh. Mayor
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  Speaker 1: s is along with all of his fellow citizens, Like, yeah,
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  Speaker 1: they officially declare war on France, on the entire country.
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  Speaker 1: They do not have anyone else in Spain behind them,
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  Speaker 1: No one cares except for them, and they they act
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  Speaker 1: really draft up a legal document to clearing war. And
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: and let's let's you know, a war is serious, ben sure,
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: war is a serious thing. So let's lay out the
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  Speaker 1: consequences of this war. Um, none, no consequences none, Not
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  Speaker 1: a single shot fired, not a single French person assaulted.
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  Speaker 1: Because in fact, there's one point where in our notes
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  Speaker 1: where I love that. The note says, as far as
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  Speaker 1: we could tell, not even a French tourist ever went
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  Speaker 1: to this town. So there was never an opportunity to,
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: you know, bring this war to action. Yeah, there's this
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: was a a war in name only it's kind of
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: like the town I grew up in passed a law
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: as a promotional stunt when KFC opened up its first
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: restaurant in my hometown. And the law is that it
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: is against the law in my hometown to eat fried
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: chicken with a fork and knife. You must eat it
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  Speaker 1: with your fing There's just a pr stunt, promotional law
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  Speaker 1: that had about the same amount of legitimate you know, uh,
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  Speaker 1: legal standing as this as this war did. Yeah, and
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  Speaker 1: yet it stayed on the town you know statutes. It was.
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  Speaker 1: They were, according to their own laws, legally at war
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  Speaker 1: with France and behind and originally they were behind it.
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  Speaker 1: Now I want to note one amazing thing about politics
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: in general is that it's so it should be. Um,
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: politics should be run according to policy, but often decisions
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: are made based on how people feel immediately after someone
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: gives a speech, and and you gotta give it to
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: Mary says, he makes a great he makes a great speech.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: There we've got minutes of the assembly. I just want
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  Speaker 1: to read a quote here. Uh, this is how he
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: started this office. Our King Alfonso, when passing through Paris
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: on the twenty nine day of September was stow owned
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  Speaker 1: and defended in the most cowardly fashioned by miserable hordes
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  Speaker 1: of the French nation. And he says, um, he brings
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: up Napoleon because of course he does clearly right. And uh,
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  Speaker 1: he's doing this thing where he's like, May I remind
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  Speaker 1: you that when Napoleon's troops invaded Spain at the start
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: of the nineteenth century, quote just one woman who was old,
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  Speaker 1: wretched and bedraggled, but a daughter of Spain nonetheless, had
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  Speaker 1: on her own cut the throat of thirty two Frenchmen
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  Speaker 1: who are billeted in her home. Therefore, the example of
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  Speaker 1: this woman is enough to let the inhabitants of France
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  Speaker 1: fear that this village of Liha, although it has woldly
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: one able men, proposes to declare war on all the France,
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  Speaker 1: since one man of this our village is worth ten
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: thousand frenchmen. The crowd goes wild, of course it does. Yeah,
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: next thing, you know, they're eating freedom fries. And I
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: don't know, this really reminded me of you know, on
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: time and are not so distant past here in America,
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: where it became a very pr thing to to distance
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: yourself from anything that even was remotely connected to France,
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: including the Belgian treat of French Fries. Yes, yeah, so
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: it's yeah, exactly right there on that same level, right
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: that that Uh, I'm sure that the mayor was able
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: to ride that to great success, and so the other
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: ninety nine able men were unable to to dethrone him
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: from his mayoral seat. I guess so, yeah, because you know,
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: I love that you point out, uh, the hilarious and
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: and tremendously fortunate fact that this war had no known casualties,
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: right uh, and it had no known physical conflicts slash speeches.
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: But the edge of the harbor, you might say, hey,
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: Jonathan Casey ben Uh, you guys are maybe being a
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: little unfair because if they're a hundred men here, maybe
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: they're all you know, maybe they're all stone cold killers.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: Not really. I think that one of the main businesses
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: at the time was farming. So they were they were
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: growing barley, they were growing olives. They had no standing army.
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: This is a town where like there are maybe a
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: couple of things that are purposely made weapons, but most
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: of the implements they got would probably be uh farming
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: right side. They literally are growing olives, the symbol of peace. Yeah, yeah,
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: so uh not one gun shot is fired. So this
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: goes on like it's literally on their books for decade
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: after decade, like it becomes a point of pride in
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: the small town. It's it's almost like not necessarily that
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: they take it seriously, although some may have, but more
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: that it was one of those things that kind of
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: set apart your town from other towns. Right. Oh, our
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: town is the town that's been at war with France
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  Speaker 1: since eighteen eighty three, and that would hold true all
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: the way up until the nineteen seventies. And the thing
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: that turned it around was when the then King of
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: Spain went to Paris and had a good time. And
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: that's all it took. It's like, get a king of
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: Spain to go there and things things went well, and
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: thus a foundation for peace was made. Yeah. Yeah, it
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: thinks in no small part to Mayor Diego Sanchez Quartets,
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: uh yes, who who had a slightly less uh inflammatory
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: approach than his predecessor from a nearly a century earlier. Right,
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: And so he tries, he tries to make peace with
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: the government of France. They didn't notice, they did, I
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: notice at all. I don't know. It was lost in
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: the may l or. They were just like, we have
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: stuff to do. Uh, we were looking at some some
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: pretty big issues here. We'll get to you when we
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: get to you, right right. So this in the nineteen seventies,
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: that's when this mayor Cortes rights to the French. He
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: gets ignored. They get back to him like a decade
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: later in the nineteen eighties, and they send a diplomat
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: who's at the French embassy in Madrid to Leehard to
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: negotiate a peace treaty. And the diplomat has a quote
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: that I thought was just was just like dripping with
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: the most passive aggressive weirdly, you know what it is.
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: It's a little condescending, a little bit, no more than
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: a little bit, but it's extremely French. It's fair, it's
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: it's they turned up the they turned up the French
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: to eleven. It's it's it's Maurice Chevalier level of frenchness
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: from here, Yeah, saying that we are all rather amused.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: I mean, you think about it. For this town, it's
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: one of those defining things about that town, this teeny
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: little town in Spain. For France, it's it's literally nothing.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's has no impact on France, on
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: France's relation with anywhere else in Spain, let alone anywhere
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: else in the world, has no impact on France's citizens
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: at home or abroad. So clearly there was not going
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: to be uh like, it wasn't gonna be treated with
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: like stately regalness or anything of that nature. At the
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: same time, the big thing here is just to sit
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: there and say like, yeah, let's go ahead and do
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: this one. It's it's a funny story, but too for
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: these people in this little town in Spain, it is important.
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: Like I think this is sort of like when uh,
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: someone meets a celebrity, right, if I meet a celebrity,
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: to me, that's a big big deal, like, oh my gosh,
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: I finally get to meet this person I've looked up to.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: To them, I'm just somebody. I'm just a person like
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: I I'm not important, I'm not anyone they know I
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: know about them because of the fact that they're a
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: celebrity and they're in the limelight. They know nothing about me.
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: And I think it's the same way in this case,
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: except we're talking about you know, a country, in a
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: in a town, and so sometimes you run into celebrities who,
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: despite the fact that you are nobody to them. I
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: mean not that they, you know, lack compassion or anything,
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: but they don't know you, they'll still treat you with
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: respect and kindness and compassion, and they'll they'll value what
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: you have to say. Or you might run into a
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: celebrity who's just they don't have the time of day
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: for you, just a monster. Yeah, yeah, yeah, And in
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: this case France was a little bit on the night side.
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: But I mean, ultimately those articles of peace were drawn up,
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: the declaration of war unanimously reported the peace treaty contous. Yeah,
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: there were like three or four grouchy old people saying,
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: We're like, how dare they take away? Are so feature?
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: There's this great Washington Post article from the year the
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: peace three was signed. Uh, And there's a postal worker
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: who lives in the small town of the Harts government official.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: His name is Pedro Martin, and he is against the
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: peace treaty. He says, I see no justification for signing peace.
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: And when they said, well, why, what's your beef? He
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: essentially said France was opposed to Spain entering into the
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: European Common Market and they're a basque separatist terrorists who
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: are currently residing in France. Yeah, that was those was
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: two big reasons that there could never be peace. So
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: so in that case, you're talking about war being some
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: form of general role protest, which I guess if you're
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: taking a very like far away look at what war is,
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: you could say, Okay, yeah, that's a very overt way
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: to protest something, except for the fact that there's nothing
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: going on in this war. So and and again it's
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: a statement that that the country of France as a
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: whole would have not even noticed. So you you start
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: to question that. I did like the fact that there
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: was a schoolmaster, Ezekiel Campo who who said, you know,
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: don't think we were ever afraid of the French, and
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: is besides, if they had to do battle with us,
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: they never would have found us, which is the best
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: thing I've ever ready. If we were to ever actually
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: go to war, we'd be fine because they don't know
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: where we are. It's so it's so strange to me too,
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: because um, this got me thinking and it's not the
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: first time I thought this. Uh, this got me thinking
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: about how declaring war works. I think now for it
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: to be legal. Only countries can declare war like you,
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: you and Casey and I can't. We can't declare war
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: because we're not a country. And yeah, you're You're only
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: supposed to be able to declare war on another country, right.
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: I I attempted to declare war on Tuscaloosa, Alabama, but
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: that was not recognized by any even first. I even
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: started first by saying, I'm totally sovereign, guys, I'm totally sovereign,
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: and I declare war in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. Yeah, I kind of.
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: You know, it's weird because for anyone who doesn't live
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: in the States, one one very strange thing about our
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: recent history in this country is that we went through
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: a phase where we would declare war on ideas things. Yeah. No,
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: it's yeah, very much though, Like, uh, there was a
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: little bit of a talk of a war on poverty,
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: but that lost the spotlight to a war on drugs,
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: and then, you know, a war that a war that
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: some would argue the war itself made the issue so
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: much worse. Yeah. Yeah, I think the drugs won. I
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: think it's safe to say that the drugs war just
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: by fighting in the war, we guaranteed that the drugs
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: would win. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I say this as
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: a as a kid who won some essays for dare
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: I teacher? Yeah that yeah, yeah. No. There are a
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: lot of different wars. We obviously there's the every year
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: we have the War on Christmas. Oh gosh, yeah, yeah,
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: are you warming up? Oh you know, I've I got
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: a little time before I get mad at whatever color
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: cups Starbucks comes out with next year. So I'm gonna
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: I'm just I'm gathering my uh my ammo and that
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: ammo being Starbucks gift cards. Actually, I guess that's I'm
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: I'm I'm pro war on Christmas. I suppose I got
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: to come out with it. I'm like I'm on those
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: front lines. Yeah, I like, you know, I like the
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: Christmas vibe. It's no Halloween, which still remains my favorite. Yeah,
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: but but it's It's true. War is terrible, and this
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: one happens to be a great example of how silly
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: and ridiculous war can be. This is only, by the way,
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: there's only one example. History is riddled with. Oh no,
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: there's there there There are tons of wars that were
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: fought for incredibly dumb, petty reasons. We're just fortunate that
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: the one we're covering today is one where there were
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: no casualties. There were no there were no human consequences
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: to this war apart from a funny story, which is
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: great because there's so many other examples where you're like,
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: look at this dumb reason people fought, and like how
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: many people died because of that dumb reason, and then
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: you know, it really brings the mood down quite a bit.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: But this is a case where we can look at
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: this and say, this is truly a ridiculou this moment
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: in history, and there were no overt bad consequences of it.
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: It just turns out to be an amusing story. And
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: at this point, I gotta tell you, I want to
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: check out this town. It's about fifty three miles from
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: the provincial capital, right of a media, but the road
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: is in kind of bad condition, so it takes five
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: hours to drive or twelve if you're a French army. Right,
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: just like, it's not even worth it. Let's just go back, oldman, drinkine. Right,
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: and you'd have to figure out where the town is. Right,
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: We did not know is that left or a right?
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: That do not know it's not going to show it
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: up on the GPS. You were leaning into this accent.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: I love it. Now, case here, you are you digging
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: this accent? I love a good over the top accent. Yeah, yeah,
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: it's got a who's that character in Beauty and the
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: Beast the candlestick? Yeah that was a Marie Chevalier kind
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: of impression and he was doing. Yeah, I played a
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: I played a French villain at the Georgia Renaissance Festival
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: one season, and it was uh that everyone referred to
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: my terrible over the top accent as as a Quebec
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: quaf fur trader as opposed to a noble Frenchman as
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: I can do. I remember, I remember years and years ago,
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: man we were we were, I think, just joking around
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: doing some strange accents or something, and he told me
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: that the key to a good accident stage is not
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: worrying about whether it's good. That's true. Yeah, no, I
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: I have maintained for a long time that the secret
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: to being a good performer is to generally just stop caring. Yeah,
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: now I've I've got to ask. I also want to
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: get Casey your opinion on this, because you are a
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: resident francophone. Uh have you ever heard of this story?
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: This this weird tiny town making war. No, this is
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: completely new to me, and I'm quite enjoying it. Does
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: the French response sound? Does that? Does that like track
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: with your concepts of French culture? Yeah? I mean I
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: don't want to speak too broadly, so you you speak
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: for the entire nation, Okay, I am the ambassador, I'm
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: the representative. Yeah, I mean it sounds pretty pretty French. So,
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: I mean it could have been it could have been
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: that they would have just ignored it entirely, right, That's
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: that was another possibility. But the fact that this was
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: something that was amusing and it's again a great story. Uh.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: The fact that they actually did acknowledge it and go
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: through with the shows that there's there's a sense of
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: humor about it. There's also this desire to say, like,
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: let's close this ridiculous war that doesn't like why why
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: is this a driving force? Does anyone even view it
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: as a driving force anymore? You know? It feels like
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: a vanne get short story. Yeah, it feels like some
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: people are right there. Uh, and let's ended there, Let's
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: let's end on a happy ending. Uh, you know, war
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: is terrible in the heart and France, thank god are
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: no longer embroiled in this brutal conflict. So glad that
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: a piece broke out. Yes, yes, finally right. Uh so, Jonathan,
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: I have to thank you for coming on the show
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: as yourself. Thank you, not the not the quister. Yeah, okay,
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: So we're gonna end it, don't I didn't. I have
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: a segment ready to go, but I will wait for
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: you and Old to be together before I unleash it
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: upon you and the listeners. Okay, alright, deal. I feel
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: like i'm i'm I feel like it narrowly avoided a
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: dangerous situation. This is how divers must feel when something
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: brushes up behind them and when they see that there
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: was a shark. Right, So thanks for thanks for giving
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: me a pass on this one. This concludes today's episode,
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: but not our show, uh, Jonathan. As you know, we
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: often end with some questions for our fellow listeners here,
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna suggest, um, let's see what do
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: we want to hear? What is one of the most
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: ridiculous wars that you know of? Uh? If you were
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: to declare war yourself as an individual, who are what
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: would you declare war on that's a good one. Let
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: us know. You can find us on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter.
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: We love to recommend our favorite Facebook page, Ridiculous Historians.
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: You can meet our favorite part of the show, your
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: fellow listeners there. And while you're on the internet. I
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: don't know if we say this often. We don't say
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: this all the time, Jonathan, but you have your own
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: shows that you have one of the longest running shows
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: in our entire network, and that's Tech Stuff. Yeah, third
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: oldest show that we launched. Stuff you should know and
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: stuff you missed in history class, which originally was called
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: fact or Fiction both launched first and then Tech Stuff
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: like a month later. And um yeah, so we publish
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: uh two new episodes a week and it covers everything
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: in technology, from how particle accelerators work to the history
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: of the toilet, which, hey, stay tuned, guys, spoilers, spoilers,
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: my friend. Yes, you can also find us on our
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: own personal social meats. I am at Ben Bolan on
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: Instagram and I'm at Ben Bowlen h s W on Twitter.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: I'm at John Strickland Come at me, yo. So that's
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: all for now, but seriously, do do let us know
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: who or what you would declare war on. I can't
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: wait to hear. I think we might be opening Pandora's jar,
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: but we'll see. For more podcasts from my Heart Radio,
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows,