Latest / The Christian Reeve Podcast / Lu.Ci | The Christian Reeve Podcast | #147 |

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Lu.Ci | The Christian Reeve Podcast | #147 | · The Christian Reeve Podcast

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Hello and welcome to another episode of Christian brief
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podcast. Today's guest is a singer song,
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writer and poet all the way from London.
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Her name is Lucy and we are doing for the first time ever a
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live version of the Christian re podcast right now.
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I actually am recording and sharing a live on Instagram.
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This is really weird but here we are.
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But the we're doing two things at once.
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We doing a new thing here, and we're also having the wonderful
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Lucy on our show. How are Elusive, welcome to the
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show. Welcome to the Christian way
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podcast. Yes, thanks very much.
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Yeah, I'm good man. Oh good.
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I'm glad that we can make this experience.
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Do this experience together for the first time ever on Instagram
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as well as recording a podcast, very exciting times.
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Yeah, I don't know, I don't know where to look, I don't know what
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I'm doing, but it's good and we were just talking off camera.
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Well, we were still on camera but we were talking about this
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idea of being out of your comfort zone and I think it's an
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important place to be a lot of the time and actually What what
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are your thoughts on that? Well, when you find yourself out
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of your comfort zone, like where's your kind of suppose
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sweet spot as far as the compass own is concerned?
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Well, I try to push my comfort zone all the time I mean, what's
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that kind of Mantra? You know, do something that
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scares you? Otherwise, you're not gonna be
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able to grow, you know, you're not going to feel any kind of
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progress. So, I'm constantly trying to
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push myself out of my comfort zone, because I think that's the
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only way, the, you actually learn how to do new stuff.
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As well and he kind of yeah. If you don't do it, then you're
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not going to learn. So I mean my comfort zone used
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to be very small but it's I've literally literally just pushed
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its boundaries every single time, every single time, I mean,
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as an artist as a creative, you kind of have to do that to be
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able to find out new stuff about yourself as well.
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I agree with that and I think that it's a progressive thing
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over time, it gets easier and easier, and easier, but it's one
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of the guests I had on my Show recently was talking about this
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idea of, he called it, you stress and distress and
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basically, the idea being that you stress is positive stress.
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It's a good thing and the stress is a bad thing, but when you
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ever you fill this little bit of stress on you, When you've got a
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lot of projects on and you feel like can I make this happen?
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Can I do this? Can I do this?
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That's a good. That's the sweet spot and then
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you start slowly working on it and you make it a reality and
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that's how you figure it out you know.
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Yeah definitely I completely understand that feeling that
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whole, my God is am I going to be able to pull this off because
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you're I always have these like illusion de Grande yours, right,
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where I think like I'm going to whenever I'm doing a music
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video, I'm like great I can have I can be in these locations.
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And I can have all these people and all these dancers and all
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these things that can happen. And it's like, how can I make
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this happen? And then you have to kind of
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break it down a little bit. Pull yourself back, you know,
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understand your budget first are and but you any project, it's
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always like, am I going to be able to pull this off?
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Can I make this happen? But when you just concentrate on
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each little steps, I like baby steps and you achieve each one,
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then you get there in the end. But you do have that kind of
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freaked out of, is it going to happen?
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What my good. You know, how's it going to end
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up? But you managed to get there in
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the end. As long as you can actually see
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the final goal, then you'll get there.
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How do you? Yeah, yeah, I'm coming from.
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But like, how do you approach being sort of critical of
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yourself, what you mentioned being on shoots and stuff?
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So, you're all through in that whole process, you're in charge
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of that, you got team of people working under you.
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So like, how do you sort of approach that and be critical of
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yourself? I was your approach to that.
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Well, get an idea in my head and just kind of run with it.
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I mean, when you're working with a team of people it's always a
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bit easier because you can kind of bounce ideas off of each
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other and then see how realistic something is and how achievable
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something is as well. Self-critical.
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I'm always self-critical. So I mean if you speak to my
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videographers or my photographers, I'm constantly
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after every every she every clip No, I'll be like I could show me
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at let me have a look at what's going on as it as we're going
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along. You gotta make sure that you
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know you're going to be happy and you don't have a lot of time
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to do these things so and time costs money.
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So you've got to make sure that you kind of get as much as you
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can into that time as possible, you know?
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Yeah, that's that's a tricky one.
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When you know, you is being paid by the hour and lat Remember the
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first time I went into a studio many, many years ago.
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And I worked with this amazing producer.
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And I remember the key takeaway that I learned from him, was
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this idea of like anything? You put out under your name,
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should be like, excellent. Always put 100% into it.
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But the key lesson that I learned, as a result of that was
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this kind of thing where we be in the studio together and the
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rest of the band would go home, and it just be me and him till
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the Dying hours of the night. And you know, we wouldn't, we
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wouldn't even mention the fact that we've gone over time, I
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would just stay there, I'd learned from him, we'd work on
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things. And then one evening I said
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like, oh I'm sorry man, feel if I could name was Phil.
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I was like, I can't afford the extra time.
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And he's like, listen. This is as much for you as it is
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for me. Like this work is going out
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under my name. So it needs to be excellent.
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And sometimes you kind of got to go above and you always have to
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go above and beyond for your art and what you're doing.
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And you can't just put out How can I put this?
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Like well I'll put it, bluntly half our stuff.
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You can't put half-assed stuff out.
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You need to, you need to always make sure everything that you
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did was as good as the last thing you did basically, like
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setting high standards for yourself at all times and night,
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trying to meet that and that work ethic sort of stayed with
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me. And now whenever I work with
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other people, that's the expectation, I have.
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And You know, if I find that someone's not had that level.
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I'm like, okay I understand I don't get annoyed but I'm like
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we just not on the same wavelength as far as like
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understanding the vision and stuff.
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Like for example, take this podcasters an example.
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Every time I have someone on the show, I would say 99% of the
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time. People enjoy it.
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People have a good time and and the objective is achieved.
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What's the objective? While the objective is to
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promote the person to get to No, the guest to share stories, you
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know, that's that's kind of for the guests and also for me, but
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it's also about kind of like producing good content and a
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good show and 99% of the time, people will be willing and ready
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to participate. They will be in that process.
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You know, i'mi'm ready and show up, right?
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Basically be willing to have a conversation, okay?
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But sometimes people on and It's only happened a few times to me,
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but what it's taught me is to kind of go out of my way to do
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research on people and understand.
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Can this person have a conversation and are they
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willing to have a conversation? That is key.
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That is so important. The willingness to have a
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conversation and going back to what I was saying before the
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willingness to work with you to create a vision that yeah people
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might be being paid to produce this video for you or whatever.
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But money as we Seen time after time is not always really the
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biggest motivation. You know, you need motivation
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above that, like passion to create good art and really be
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passionate about everything that you're creating.
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So, that the final thing, the final product is something
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everyone can be proud of, you know?
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Yeah, 100%. I mean, I always want to make
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sure that anything that I put out, because it's basically
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going to be representing you. You are the brand.
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So, anything that goes out under your name, you want to make sure
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that it's, you know, Hundred percent exactly what you're
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looking for. I actually find working on a
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project. One of the most exciting times
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in life. It I absolutely love it.
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I'm so passionate about what I do and when I've got an idea and
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I've got a vision and I can see exactly where I want it to go.
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The closer I get to that. Being finished is just awesome.
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But what I also find and I've spoken to a spoken to other
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artists about this Is that ofter after you've done like a single
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release for example. So you've gone through the whole
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production with that, the actual recording the production and
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then it comes down to the music video.
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Once, it's once all that's out, it's kind of like, ah, you have
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this shock of? Oh, it's done now.
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And then you just kind of waiting to see what the results
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are going to be, and what the feedback is going to be from
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from your audience and we target audience from from your, from
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your friends, your fans, your family, and so on.
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And lots of artists are said that, they have this kind of
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lull. There's like emotional lull
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where they can get depressed afterwards, you know?
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And it's like their mental health, can be affected and I
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think it's because you get so busy and caught up in what
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you're doing. And in your vision and it is an
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amazing experience to kind of go through something like that and
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create something like that. That after it's done, it stops
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you know that process stops and I think that's what it is.
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And then you're just kind of sitting about like oh I did that
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but now on I know exactly what you mean.
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I think it's like this is why I always make sure that I'm
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working all the time. What's the next project?
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What's the next project? I think it's also kind of maybe
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understand why. For example, actors, never
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stopped. You know you sometimes you hear
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people say like how they've made all this money.
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They're super famous. Like, why do they need to keep
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creating? Well, a you keep creating
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because you love what you're doing but be I think it's to
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tackle that Gets to like sometimes the best therapy is
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just working and keep creating and keep doing what you love
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like and it's the the chase of that that's actually the thing
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that's I don't think that keeps you going, I suppose, but I want
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to kind of talk a little bit more about this mental-health.
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Angle, like you've had some struggles, haven't you over over
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the like course of the last 10 years or so?
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I think you've documented that little bit on online and stuff.
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So let's, let's talk about that. But with regards to what you're
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comfortable talking about, I just want to kind of explore how
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that's not just affected your life, but also your music as
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well like with regards to, you know, committing to projects or
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in between projects, or how that's actually affected your
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life, and your music. Well, to be honest with you, I
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mean, it's all my music, it's all my music, anything that I
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put out, whether it be my music or my poetry all comes from a
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very emotive place. So It's I think it's a bit like
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therapy and I know that there's a lot of writers out there and
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there's a lot of poets out there that will agree that, you know,
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kind of writing down all their feelings, does help them kind of
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process it and overcome it as well and it's the exact same
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thing with music and I incorporate that in everything
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that I do. I mean, I tell you a funny
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story, I was going to go out on a date, right?
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Okay. I was meant to go on a date with
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a Zealand rugby player. And I was very, very excited and
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and I was going up. London I was I was up there with
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some friends and he was meant to becoming a meeting us and we've
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been talking for ages and it was like you know like going to go
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on a date with it's like really famous person and it's going to
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be amazing and I spoke to him throughout the day and then he
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let me down. He let me down.
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Okay, and he never showed I know, right?
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I know. Anyway.
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So I did what any other Normal person would probably do in the
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middle of London with loads of bars and got absolutely
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hammered. So I got absolutely hammered.
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I got on loads of tequila shot shot, shot shot shot and got
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really upset about it and then I came back and I wrote a whole
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song. I literally wrote a whole song
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and it's actually quite good so that will probably come out at
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some point but it is sad. But that's just the way that you
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kind of process stuff a and how you deal with.
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It it just comes out artistically.
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Yeah, I mean that's spot-on. I think of every good song that
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I've ever written over the years especially in more recent years
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has been exactly the same thing where something really horrible
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happens or you're thinking back to a situation that occurred and
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you just start writing. You know, you don't think like
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oh I'm going to write a song about this and it's going to be
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huge. You just you're in pain, you
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know. Sometimes like for me sometimes
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I'll just be feeling like really, really depressed.
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And I just pick up my guitar and I just just Feeling sorry for
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myself and I started just playing music and then I hear,
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you know, you get that golden moment.
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When you hear something you like huh, okay?
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All right. And then you start jotting
14:05
things down and you what you're writing down, how you feel?
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You're writing down. Like, oh, and that can be happy,
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sad, whatever the case may be. And then it takes a life of its
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own and then obviously, you move past the point of pain and you,
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you get to the work point where you start actually going through
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the process of, okay. Now, this is something tangible.
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This is a thing that I can use in the actually incorporate and
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then, you know, I think I'll like a lot of the time as a
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musician. There's there's a sense of like,
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Detachment from the song Eventually.
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Like, it always means something to you, but when you sing it,
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and you sing it often all the time.
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Like you, you kind of separate yourself from the song or you
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move on with your life. So you're no longer in that
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place in your lap. So for example, a good example
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of this would be like Adele, you know, like all the songs she
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wrote back In the day, were about her real-life experiences
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real relationships. That have been tough.
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The way those men had treated her and what that did to her
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mental health and everything in between, you know, and it's it's
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sad. And you often think like, oh my
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God, it's so horrible. This person went through this
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and they turned it into something glorious.
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But I wonder sometimes is there like a Detachment between those
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feelings or they still always dormant or so?
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Not, I mean to say are they dormant or you know, are they
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still very much real but I want to ask You about that.
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Like when you write a song, are you able to sort of detach
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yourself from those emotions? Or do you just kind of, like,
15:30
let them out when you play Live? Or what's your process with
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regards to that? So, it's difficult because if
15:40
you write, if you're writing a song that, you know, you're
15:43
getting very, very emotional about, I always find that you
15:47
have to kind of sing it and saying it and saying it and
15:49
saying it and saying it over and over again before you, you don't
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get emotional singing it. So, for example, if I've written
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a song that you know, is quite sad and it's it comes from a sad
16:03
place, then when I'm When I'm sitting here and you know, I'm
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on my keyboard also on I will I'll be crying you know because
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it would be coming from a really rural place.
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So you have to kind of you have to rehearse rehearse rehearse,
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until you get to a point where you can physically do it and
16:24
perform in front of people where you're just not you're not you
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know, that emotion isn't affecting you anymore.
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So I think you can in answer to your question.
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I think you can detached like B, but I don't think I don't think
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that you're completely ever detach from it because the whole
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point that people will relate to you is that they will feel your
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emotions. And I mean, it's a beautiful
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gift to be able to, you know, give over your emotions.
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Let other people feel your emotions and relate to your
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emotions through musical sound. I just think that's amazing.
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Yeah, I couldn't agree more and I think that's why some some of
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the greatest musicians that have ever been and continue to be
17:12
connect with people because they just right.
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Straight From the Soul. Like one thing that always kind
17:18
of resonates with me is, you know, sometimes you'll be
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sitting there listening to someone speaking or listening to
17:26
a song and in that moment, You can just you just know that it's
17:33
real, you know, that that person is not trying to pull the wool
17:37
over your eyes. It's not fake story.
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It's a genuine story from a really deep place, and it's a
17:44
special moment and you feel part of that, and you can connect
17:46
with it. And it's, I can't exactly
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describe the feeling. But the closest way I could
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describe it is, like, sometimes I'll be sitting here doing this
17:54
podcast listening to people sharing their stories, I think
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they just hits me, you know, like the, the emotions of it
18:02
because it's another human being bear in their soul and their
18:04
experiences and it's beautiful and I think.
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The thing that we always tend to forget that we need to remind
18:15
each other sometimes is this idea that you know, we were all
18:18
connected at the end of the day whether we want to admit it or
18:20
not even our enemies, we're connected to that.
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I'll give you an example. There's someone at this bar that
18:26
I like to go to, that doesn't like me and it's unfortunate.
18:30
You know, I really have tried with this person.
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The story is basically, I was at the bar one night and she'd had
18:39
a lot to drink, and she was asking me my podcast about
18:43
various other things and it just got a bit uncomfortable you
18:48
know, it got to a situation where She'd ask me a question,
18:53
I'd begin answering and then she cut me off and it just kept
18:57
happening. And there are a few moments
19:00
where, you know, I said, do you think you know me or something?
19:05
Do you have a problem with me? Like I asked and I was, I was a
19:08
little bit annoyed. I was like, what?
19:10
You don't know me. But you seem as though, you know
19:12
me go and tell me what you know, you know, tell them if you know
19:16
me. So well tell me Because I
19:20
thought maybe she thought I was like pompous or something.
19:22
I don't really know. Anyway, she decided in that
19:26
moment that she doesn't like me anymore and that's fine.
19:28
You don't have to like everyone. I don't expect to be liked by
19:31
everyone, but here's the thing. We both hang out at the same
19:37
spots, you see the same faces, right?
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And for a while we hadn't spoken or acknowledge each other or
19:45
anything. And then last night, I was out
19:50
having fun and I saw her on her own, and I decided to go and
19:55
clear the air and, you know, I'd not done anything wrong in the
19:58
situation at all. And other people like the but
20:03
the bar man that was there. The whole night when she was
20:06
like that with me had had a word with her about her behavior and
20:13
it was uncomfortable for me to learn that because I was like,
20:16
well, I didn't ask you to do that.
20:17
And, you know, we're not, we're not at school anymore.
20:20
We're adults. You know, this is it's awkward.
20:23
It's awkward. When, when and especially when
20:25
you have to tell like a fully grown adult, you know, to Their
20:30
behavior, but I had no part in that.
20:32
And I don't know whether Maybe she thinks that I asked him to
20:36
say something. I don't even pretend to know,
20:39
right? But the point, the reason I
20:40
bring up this story is, I went up to this person and, you know,
20:44
I tried to clear the air and say, Hey listen, you know, I
20:47
know and the first thing she did as soon as I spoke to her she
20:51
just like starts flipping the bird at me like you know like
20:54
just poking that like I was like this is so childish.
20:58
This is so tight and it's surreal being in that moment and
21:01
I'm just like, okay, just ignore it.
21:04
It's like listen like let's try and clear the air because what I
21:06
was going to say was we go to the same places.
21:11
We don't have to be friends, but like, let's maybe clear the air,
21:14
you know, like, let's get on and she's basically just threatened
21:19
to get me Bard, and all this, and I quickly realized that
21:21
done. We're going to keep pressing
21:22
this because I do want to stress this person, but it is what it
21:26
is, and you get these uncomfortable.
21:28
Moments in life sometimes. And what can you do?
21:32
What can you do? You just have to kind of do your
21:34
best and And just work with that, you know, and there's that
21:40
much more, you can really say or do with response to that.
21:43
You just you do what you can. Yeah, I mean I've had a similar
21:50
situation, so I'm gonna probably going to overshare slightly now
21:56
but I had a situation where somebody, somebody put something
22:02
in my drink. Yeah.
22:04
So down at the local pub. Yeah.
22:07
And they and to this day, they deny it but you know your own
22:11
body, right? And every time that I go down to
22:15
his local pub, this person will appear and and I'll say to
22:21
people, I say to the the people that I'm with my friends, I say
22:24
to them, I don't, I don't want to be here anymore, I want to
22:27
leave. I do want to be in the same
22:28
place as this person and they'll say, look they're here, you
22:33
can't do anything about it as much as you'd want to 0 as the
22:37
police are probably get involved anyway, but you've got to deal
22:41
with the situation. Ian.
22:43
Now, I've thought many times about approaching this person,
22:46
they did want to try to talk to me and I told them where to go
22:50
in not very nice way, but it's sometimes life kind of throws
22:59
you in situations that you're extremely uncomfortable with.
23:02
And as much as I am, going to say my next Point, obviously,
23:07
it's not acceptable for what I'm speaking about, but you have to
23:12
kind of of learn from these situations and how to deal with
23:17
these situations to the best of your ability.
23:20
And ultimately, it does make you stronger as a person to be able
23:24
to cope with something like that.
23:26
I mean, obviously, I'm talking in a little bit more of an
23:29
extremity that these things do happen.
23:34
You know, it's ironic because I have the the exact same
23:38
experience where every time they're there, I feel The bull.
23:44
And I tell people that I'm like, I told the guys that I was with
23:47
last night, I was like, yeah, because we paid to get into this
23:50
particular place and he was like, hey, how you doing?
23:54
And I'm just like, well, you know, I hope your because it was
23:58
his birthday, a few days before. So I was like, I hope you're
24:01
having a good time. I'm okay except that this person
24:04
is here. And I explained that I had, you
24:07
know, it was uncomfortable for me to go up to this person and
24:11
click and clear. The a even though, I've not done
24:13
anything wrong, it was uncomfortable for me to do that
24:16
and they just, you know, push me away in a really horrible way
24:21
and Now, I don't want to sound like a victim or something, but
24:25
like I'm a pretty sensitive guy. I take stuff like that to heart
24:29
and I want to get on with people.
24:30
I really do, you know, and I accept that I'm not going to be
24:32
everyone's cup of tea. I get that.
24:34
But like if you're going to dislike me shouldn't it be for
24:37
like a genuine reason? Not just because you got too
24:40
drunk and were horrible to me and then you got told off for it
24:44
and now you've decided that I'm Public Enemy.
24:46
Number One. God, I don't know what she says
24:49
to people but It's like that. And the point is here because I
24:55
do want to get off track, the point is like, and it's the same
24:57
as what you're going through. Every time you go to this place,
24:59
you want to have a good time. You want to enjoy yourself,
25:02
that's why you're there and that person's presence means that you
25:05
can't enjoy yourself unfortunately.
25:07
Because, and it doesn't matter, you can be the greatest thing
25:09
could be going on. There could be like the Kick-Ass
25:11
band, you know, you with all your friends guys, chatting you
25:14
up or ever like everything's great right?
25:16
But you still like see them or feel their presence in the
25:20
corner of the room and You just can't get your head off off that
25:24
and it's like it drives you nuts.
25:27
It really does. And I totally get where you're
25:29
coming from. And but yeah, let's take it in a
25:32
more positive root. Like, I think it's you're right
25:34
about this this concept of working through these difficult
25:37
things. Like I look at it as a lesson.
25:40
I try to say okay what What's the lesson to learn here?
25:44
I think it's the lesson is to learn how to deal with maybe
25:50
people that don't like you or people have a problem with you,
25:52
how to manage that in a mature way?
25:55
That's just my personal one, perhaps for you.
25:57
It's I don't know, like just Being careful around certain
26:05
people. I mean, I don't know.
26:06
It's a tricky one, isn't it? It's that like, what's there's
26:08
many lessons? You could learn but, but it's
26:12
ironic, we're going through the same thing.
26:14
Then it's difficult to navigate. It's difficult to know what the
26:18
right thing is. And one thing I'm happy about
26:21
now is that I've done everything I could do to fix this
26:25
situation. Like, I've done, I'm happy in
26:28
the knowledge that I've done everything I can do.
26:30
Now, I just put it up to fate, you know, whatever happens
26:33
happens, and sometimes life fixes things, sometimes it
26:38
doesn't, and you just have to work for it and move forward.
26:41
That's life, but it's interesting.
26:46
But anyway, let's get back to you because we've got well,
26:50
we've really gone in like, just in such a random Direction here.
26:54
I want to talk about your music and how I want to talk about
26:57
your journey, your musical Journey.
26:58
How did you get into music and become Musician.
27:01
When did it all begin? Talk us through that Journey.
27:06
Well, I've always been into music ever since I was younger
27:08
which is going to be the standard kind of story that
27:10
you'll get from any musician in the whole entire universe.
27:14
I was I started writing poetry and then I started writing
27:20
songs. I was in, I was always in, kind
27:23
of a musicals and always on the stage and my family were very
27:29
kind of big into music as well. So there was, there was always,
27:32
you know, a tune that was playing somewhere or somebody
27:35
singing. Down the corridor and it was
27:40
always just a part of my life and I can remember watching it
27:45
go we're going to take you back now watching top of the pops and
27:49
you know watching like we're Houston and you know loads of
27:55
other stars on stage and just thinking like you know, that's
27:59
kind of, that's really where I want to be.
28:01
That's what I want to do. And again, it just is Just being
28:05
able to connect with your audience, emotionally.
28:09
Three musical sound is just just it just blows my mind how we
28:13
actually capable to do something like that.
28:16
But yeah, I've done it ever since I was a kid to really and
28:21
and it's just meeting the right kind of people and getting
28:23
involved in the right kind of people, but also about having
28:25
the right kind of guidance. Yeah, I've noticed actually that
28:30
you've been getting some traction, you've appeared on BBC
28:33
Radio London and think something bit, amazing radio, amazing
28:38
radio. Yeah, so you've been on, like a
28:42
few different channels here now and you're picking up a
28:44
following. Obviously, we've got Instagram
28:45
in the background here because you people pop it in.
28:47
I'm not ignoring you. By the way there's people coming
28:50
in, you got a following, you got people supporting you and they
28:53
like what you're about, but, If you had to kind of Define what
29:00
you're about in a nutshell, like what's your story, like, what's
29:04
the key message? You're trying to send with your
29:06
music. What would it be?
29:09
Probably that you're not alone and that other people have
29:12
experienced, what you're going through that.
29:15
You can be strong and you can overcome anything that it's okay
29:18
to be yourself and to feel how you feel, it's right to feel sad
29:23
just as long as you pull yourself up so you can drop to
29:25
the floor, but if we're at the floor, there's always one base
29:28
to go and that's going to be up. I always try to put like a
29:31
positive spin on all of my music.
29:36
There's always an element of freedom.
29:39
Of self-love and just trying to build up other people as much as
29:44
I can through my own personal experience.
29:48
I mean, when I, when I, when I release my second single control
29:54
and that's ultimately about Getting through and leaving a
30:01
very abusive relationship where you have been stripped of your
30:07
own personality and everything that would make you you and then
30:14
becoming free to actually be yourself again.
30:16
And I actually had so many people that connected with me
30:20
and you know, slid into my DMs. And we're saying I've been there
30:25
I relate with this so much. Much.
30:27
You know thank you so much or I'm going through this a moment.
30:30
Thank you so much for for releasing this, you know, your
30:33
musics actually really helped me so that I don't feel so alone.
30:37
And to know that there is a way out of these things where I can
30:41
actually you know I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.
30:44
This isn't where I'm going to be forever. so I've been the victim
30:52
of a similar situation as well and I think there's a lot of
30:57
people listening that will benefit from understanding like,
31:03
What kind, what kind of steps do you have to take?
31:06
And how did you sort of walk away from that situation?
31:11
Because that's not an easy situation when someone's
31:13
controlling you and stuff? Because, you know, I've been in
31:15
the situation myself where you, weirdly convince yourself, that
31:21
somehow what they're saying to you is right, even though it's
31:23
not you convinced this it's like a you're like always like they
31:27
gas like you but you also gas like yourself in a weird kind of
31:30
way. And I just wanted to kind of
31:33
know like, how you got the strength to just finally said.
31:37
I know this, is it done and walk away?
31:41
Because I think a lot of people out there might be in those type
31:45
of relationships or, you know, they're trying to find a way out
31:48
and they benefit from knowing and obviously, listening to your
31:50
music is a good help. But like, hearing you sort of
31:53
tell your story a little bit? I think, might help people.
31:57
So what, you know, advice, could you give to people who are in
32:01
those sort of control? In relationships.
32:05
I think, I think the hardest part of it is people actually
32:11
recognizing that they're in one. Because you don't always notice
32:17
that because usually when you're in a relationship with somebody
32:20
like that, they usually narcissistic which means that
32:25
they will bring you up and then they will through down.
32:28
So one minute you're like, oh they love me.
32:31
And then the next minute you like, you know, they absolutely
32:34
hate me. And I'm the disgusting human
32:37
being that they're, they're trying to make me out to be, so
32:40
they have to be open to it, and they have to recognize it.
32:43
Now in some, Situations especially when people say well,
32:46
why don't they just leave the reason that they can't just
32:50
leave is because they're not recognizing what the actual
32:53
situation is that they're in. But I what I would say to people
32:57
who do recognize the situation there in that, you know, if if
33:02
you are not happy, if the relationship that you are in is
33:07
not serving your happiness, you can walk away.
33:12
And it can be as easy as that talk to somebody, talk to your
33:17
friend, confirm confide in your family.
33:20
Then there should be somebody there that you should be able to
33:22
lean on, you know, there are there, I help lines there are,
33:27
you know, telephone numbers that you can use their Charities that
33:29
you can speak to, you will be there with you, every single
33:32
step of the way to be able to to make your transition and you
33:36
can't be happy again. You can be you and it seems like
33:38
a really scary thought because these people that you're with
33:41
make you I feel like you are so dependent on them and that
33:46
without them, your life will fall apart and you you won't be
33:50
able to live, you know. Now it might be that they
33:53
control your money. It might be that they are
33:58
controlling you mentally but you can find a way out of it and
34:02
there are ways to deal with it and I'm living proof.
34:04
There are so many people that have done it.
34:06
You can definitely do it, Sochi verbal.
34:09
Yeah, I props to you, like, Well Done.
34:12
Forget another situation. I know, I know how hard it is.
34:15
I've been on the receiving end myself and it's It's difficult
34:21
and I don't think. Yeah.
34:22
When people, I mean, what you said before about people saying
34:26
I'll just walk away, it's easy, it's like it's not easy.
34:29
That's the whole point. If it were that easy, you would
34:31
have walked away years ago or months ago, you know, whatever
34:34
the case may be. And you know, I mean in a weird
34:39
way like even though we're in situations like that was done,
34:41
love the person as well. So there's that element to it
34:44
and it's it's like you look at out.
34:46
I remember once I wrote a song Called the idea of you and the
34:50
intention was more just like falling in love with the idea of
34:54
a person. But you know what, that when I
34:55
think about that more, that concept it really Rings true.
35:00
Like I imagine you probably had the same thing when you in that
35:02
relationship as I did where you see the person totally
35:05
differently and you almost like in a weird way to choose to
35:10
ignore the things that staring you in the face.
35:14
That and like, it doesn't matter how many times your friends and
35:17
family I tell you like this and this person is not good for you.
35:23
They're not, they just don't know, not right for you.
35:26
This is what they're doing but you don't see it.
35:28
Like I remember one time I was with this, this person and I
35:33
brought them to meet my family and my dad took me aside and he
35:37
said what you doing? And as I will, would you mean?
35:40
And he's like, every time you speak, you turn and look at her
35:46
for approval and And then you look back like what's going on
35:50
here? And I said, what?
35:51
And I tried to like pretend like oh that's not happening, but
35:55
deep down I knew exactly what he meant because I did it all the
35:57
time and I just didn't know I always kind of in my head, I
36:03
always thought he'll get better, it will get better.
36:05
We'll work through. This will get better and it did
36:07
he never did because that's not how it works.
36:09
If you're with someone like that, they don't want to change,
36:12
you know, they don't Envision that they have a problem and
36:15
that's their battle. Like, I'm not, you know,
36:17
everyone the way I look at life is that rule going on Journeys
36:22
ourselves and all our Journeys are different and I wish
36:25
everyone. Well, even people that haven't
36:27
liked me in the past or enemies wherever I wish everyone well,
36:29
because life is life, is for called my life is tough and a
36:34
lot of the time, the toughest thing that you're dealing with
36:37
is what's going on in your own head, you know, and it's hard
36:41
and it's heartbreaking and I wish everyone the best because I
36:46
truly believe that all of us are trying to survive each and every
36:51
day and sometimes You know, we have these great successes and
36:57
we and this is another thing as well.
36:59
Whenever I see someone is successful, I really like to
37:03
celebrate that now and I really like to make a big fuss at them
37:06
and just make them feel special because I know that feeling of
37:10
like not feeling special about yourself, not feeling good about
37:14
yourself doubting yourself feeling terrible.
37:16
And when you're in a relationship like the one you
37:17
mentioned that's just gone. You just it takes away all of
37:22
that and you're no longer who you Already more.
37:26
And I think when you get to that moment, that's when, you know,
37:29
you know, you need to make a change, you need to change
37:31
something to become the person. You are again.
37:35
And that's what's amazing about your Story.
37:37
Lucy, is that like From an outsider's perspective.
37:41
Looking in when I was doing my research on you, I was looking
37:43
at everything and I was like, okay I get it.
37:45
This person's had some like really tough challenge in life
37:48
experiences and they've chosen you know to put that into music
37:52
but like you're not coming at it from a and I'm not saying, I
37:57
don't think anyone really does this, the, they like on a
38:00
professional level. Like come across has a victim.
38:02
Like a lot of the time people take it and they choose to use
38:04
it and go. No, this is an empowerment
38:06
thing, you know. I want to, you know, inspire
38:12
you, I mean you describe yourself in media as a Survivor
38:15
and that's quite a powerful word, that's like a buzz word
38:19
that gets people's attention. So, Survivor Survivor of what
38:22
people ask questions, they want to know more, there's an
38:24
Intrigue and that's by Design but when they then learn what
38:29
you went through and how you came out, the other side of
38:32
their, it's like, oh I see. So it's like, she's trying to
38:36
build this story and this. This is what I'm supposed to
38:39
learn from this and with what, you regards to what you were
38:42
saying before. About the way you write songs, I
38:45
do the same thing, like if there's a sad song, try to give
38:48
a positive spin. Like it's not all doom and
38:50
gloom. There's some Silver lining in
38:55
all of this, you know? And that actually brings me on
38:59
to the next thing I wanted to talk about which is you did this
39:02
photo shoot, right? Which I thought was incredible.
39:06
I just saw it. And I just thought it was like
39:07
Kick-Ass as, you know, like it's basically, for those who haven't
39:11
seen it, Lucy's like semi-nude in like, what looks like a I
39:16
don't like a junkyard or something like that.
39:18
It's quite a like a cool rock and roll type deal and like I
39:22
think in one of the photos you've got like a leather jacket
39:25
slung over one shoulder, something like that.
39:28
It was just a Cool vibe. And then I looked at caption and
39:33
I saw that there's a backstory to this and this is like a
39:37
deeply personal moment for you and I just wanted to talk a
39:43
little bit about what led up to that photo, because I noticed
39:46
that you said, you didn't post it straight away, you were
39:48
sitting on these photos and I wanted to kind of know what did
39:53
that photo shoot mean to you. What did it represent and just
39:58
talk to us a little bit about the build-up to that.
40:02
Okay. So that was that was actually a
40:04
project that was working on with my photographer, Raymond called
40:10
acid. And the concept of that is
40:14
finding Beauty and broken things.
40:17
Yeah, so which was quite apt actually for me to be on it.
40:20
So that photo wasn't meant to happen.
40:25
That photo wasn't planned. There are some others that may
40:31
not. I may not ever post, but that
40:33
particular one wasn't meant to happen, and I said to him, I
40:36
said, I want to do it. I said, I want a photo, I said,
40:41
you know, Where it's artistic, but I'm showing me.
40:47
The role side of May, the vulnerable side of me, you know,
40:52
the rocky side of me. And I want to, I want to do this
40:56
shop and he said well you know if that's what you want to do
41:00
then let's just let's just do it, he's very good.
41:03
We bounce off each other really, really well.
41:06
So he's great to have on a project and I didn't know how it
41:10
was going to turn out to be honest, but that was me coming
41:14
out of my comfort zone. Just coming back to that and I
41:17
really pushed myself for that and it was a freezing cold day,
41:20
right? It was a freezing cold day, it
41:23
been raining. Mud everywhere at the shoes that
41:27
I couldn't walk in. So they had to be put on me and
41:30
I was just kind of standing around like a bit of a puppet
41:35
and then when they've, when I looked at the photo are you have
41:39
that kind of moment of is, it's my body.
41:42
All right. Am I happy with this photo?
41:46
You know, am I happy with me? You kind of get that.
41:52
It's like that second person in your head all that Imposter
41:55
syndrome, which people often talk about where it's like, you
41:59
have this, this extra person that's telling you that, you
42:02
know, you're not beautiful or your your body isn't good enough
42:05
or you don't look like all the other Instagram, girls and all
42:09
that kind of stuff. So, I kind of sat on this photo
42:12
for quite some time. And then I just thought to
42:15
myself, you know what? This is me and this is my body
42:19
and this is what God has given me, okay?
42:21
This is what I've been. I've been born with and there's
42:23
nothing that I can do about this.
42:26
So I'm just going to embrace me. And the other reason that I was
42:31
having difficulty to posting it is because of people's reactions
42:38
because something like this going out on social media you
42:42
are bound to be getting some kind of feedback that's not
42:45
going to be positive, right? I mean, it happens very much so
42:48
more on Tick-Tock, there's loads of trolls on Tick-Tock, not so
42:52
much on Instagram. Facebook is pretty bad, but I
42:55
was actually more worried about the people I knew, then the
43:00
people I didn't know, I can handle people, I don't know
43:05
saying something that's a bit - or being critical that I can
43:09
deal with as as an artist as a musician, when you are, when you
43:15
choose this kind of Lifestyle this kind of career, you have to
43:20
get used to rejection. It's the same prayer for like
43:23
actors as well. So anybody who gives kind of
43:26
like that negative feedback? You can just kind of be like,
43:28
right? Okay, he on you know whatever if
43:29
there is a part of it, that you can take more than you do.
43:32
So but when it comes down to kind of friends and family,
43:35
people can get judgmental and they can get very, very jealous
43:40
and they will talk about it. So I was a bit more worried
43:42
about that if I'm honest with you.
43:44
So the one I decided to post it. I have to say it was like the
43:48
best feeling. It was a really, really good
43:49
feeling because it was just like a real kind of Fu.
43:52
This is me. I'm going to do what I want to
43:54
do and I don't care what you think.
43:56
I'm just going to embrace this moment.
43:58
And you know what, when I become old and I'm like 85 or I'm 90
44:03
years old. If I live that long, you know,
44:05
I'm going to I'm not going to look back and go, oh my god.
44:08
Look what look what I did, how could I have got my body out in
44:11
front of all those people or you know, what about my?
44:15
I'm just going to sit back and To go to all good for you
44:18
parsley. See, well done for what you've
44:20
done, you actually look amazing and I actually probably will
44:24
miss having that body at that point.
44:27
So it's just going to be a case of light, you know, I'm glad I
44:31
done that but it's just getting over that point of that anxiety
44:36
and worrying about what other people think.
44:38
You know what steps do you take to actually overcome that
44:44
though? Because here's the thing you're
44:46
Someone that Bears this so, you know, kind of like heart on your
44:50
sleeve kind of thing. Right?
44:51
Which I totally relate to and I know that part of the answer is
44:56
going to be obviously. Well, you know I deal with it
44:59
front. The head on you know I get that
45:00
I do the same but are there any particular steps that you kind
45:05
of take things that you do to sort of get yourself in that
45:10
position where you're able to kind of handle that and stuff?
45:14
Because that voice in the back of your head, You know, it's
45:18
hard, you know, I've spoken to people before and the show about
45:21
imposter syndrome and you know, the difficulty of critics and
45:25
everything. But like, are there particular
45:27
things that you do to help yourself get to that point or
45:32
maybe mantras things that you tell yourself any tips and
45:35
tricks? Yeah.
45:38
Ignore ignore ignore. I completely ignore it and I put
45:43
it to the back of my mind. I think it's free as well.
45:46
So I'll be thinking to myself. Okay.
45:47
So what the reasons why am I feeling - about it?
45:51
Let's embrace the negativity and let's explore it.
45:55
So what the reasons that I'm feeling like that in reality?
45:59
How long are people going to be thinking about it?
46:01
Probably never, it's one of those things like You know, when
46:06
you've had a past situation. Yeah and it might have been
46:10
like, super embarrassing. And you kind of think back to
46:14
that moment makes you cringe. And you're like, you know, it
46:17
was a horrible situation, it was and he sit back and you might
46:19
even grab your face and be like, I can't believe that happened,
46:23
you know, but that other person that's involved in that isn't
46:26
thinking about you. The only person that's thinking
46:29
about you is you, so you're the only one that's having your
46:32
having a thought and it is literally just a thought as soon
46:35
as you remove that thought and that mindset, and you're free to
46:39
do whatever you like, so, explore the thoughts, ignore the
46:43
thoughts. And just one question of the
46:48
back of the, the photo shoot stuff.
46:50
What, what advice could you give to people struggling with body
46:55
confidence issues? Don't have a favorite shape.
47:01
I was thinking about this the other day.
47:02
And now, it's literally thinking, you know, what, the
47:05
best way to be able to do this stuff and overcome a how you're
47:09
feeling about your body and your appearance is to go and have a
47:13
photo shoot. I have a photo, she make
47:16
yourself feel good it's it can be a difficult thing.
47:22
If we're talking about kind of like body dysmorphia, that's a
47:26
different kind of subjects because of where you've got
47:28
people, who will look at So it's and they cannot see anything
47:32
nice looking back at them. And that's that's something that
47:36
you would overcome with some help.
47:40
So whether it be like a counselor or psychologist but
47:43
what the psychologist will tell you to do is to take photos of
47:46
yourself daily That's a therapy that they use to get over it,
47:52
which is quite interesting. But what I would say is, if
47:55
you're not feeling good about yourself, go and go, and treat
47:59
yourself be kind to yourself, have a photo shoot done.
48:02
And you will feel better about yourself and you don't need a
48:05
professional. You don't need a professional
48:08
nowadays to be able to do that, so it can be affordable to
48:11
everyone. But if you're feeling bad about
48:13
yourself, be kind to yourself and treat yourself, and just
48:15
don't care about what anybody else thinks.
48:19
I love you really positive attitude.
48:21
I really it's very infectious and I think it's an important
48:25
thing to have. You know, I think sometimes
48:28
people think that positivity in general is, you know, sometimes
48:33
you can be over the top that I remember back in the day,
48:35
whenever you'd meet someone, that's like really positive and
48:38
bubbly, and someone would say like, oh, I don't like that too
48:42
much, and then I understood that.
48:44
But then over the years, especially, like, going through
48:47
hard times, You kind of realized just how important that is and
48:52
people like that. Are you need that?
48:55
Especially when it's difficult for you to appreciate the
48:58
positive moments and find the positivity in life?
49:00
You need bubbly positive people. And the irony is the people that
49:08
are the most positive. I found that I've often had like
49:11
the most difficult lives, like, they, and I think it's like a
49:14
conscious choice to choose to be positive.
49:18
Adjective in the face of hard times because it would be very
49:23
easy and you be within your rights to just be like miserable
49:26
all the time and hate world and stuff.
49:27
And but it's a choice. You choose to be positive and I
49:34
just, I just think it's incredible.
49:35
I just I just want to take a minute to to applaud you for
49:39
that. I think, I think that's
49:40
fantastic. I do have my bad days.
49:45
I'm not positive all the time but I mean, It's I think, you
49:50
know what, I think the whole experience like three lockdown,
49:53
really taught me that where I was kind of locked in by myself,
49:57
and it just taught me that my mindset is literally controlled
50:01
by myself. So, I've got a choice, I can
50:04
either sit around and I can mope, and I can be really,
50:06
really, really miserable, which will just continue forever, or I
50:10
can try and make something a little bit more positive out of
50:12
it. And, and, and try and make my
50:16
mindset better really. When you look over the course of
50:22
your music career so far, what have been the most memorable
50:27
moments and experiences. Wow okay So, there are there's
50:36
there's different points of, of where you get to, when your
50:39
journey that you'll always remember.
50:40
So I remember like my first interview on BBC, Radio London.
50:43
That was, that was amazing. God, I was so nervous, I was so
50:46
nervous. I would literally pacing around
50:49
my studio, with my, my headphones.
50:52
And you know, they obviously couldn't see me because it's
50:54
radio, if they could see me, I would have just been a bit of a
50:57
wreck but that was pretty cool gigging.
51:02
And on Greek Street. And in a ball on gate Strait,
51:08
let on Greek street. I'll get there in a minute where
51:11
Amy Winehouse was, founded, that was pretty cool.
51:15
That was like, my first proper solo gig so much.
51:20
So that the, the gentleman who runs the bar is a painter and he
51:26
had painted a me. So I walked away with a massive
51:30
oil painting of Amy Amy Winehouse as well, and she's,
51:34
she's Legends to me, you know, because she went through some
51:36
really hard times and she used it in the music and it's a shame
51:39
that he's not here anymore, you know, because I think she had so
51:43
much more to give but that was really cool moment to and I'm
51:47
just hoping that there's going to be so many more one day I'll
51:51
turn around and say yeah I played at this, this really cool
51:53
Festival that's that's one I'm really looking forward to do.
51:58
So that's that's kind of the goal is to go like huge with
52:02
this like because that was going to be my next question.
52:04
What are your I suppose your main goals?
52:06
And also, I want to know where you sit on the whole label
52:09
versus independent situation as well, because a lot of
52:12
musicians, I'm finding especially the ones I've spoken
52:15
to tend to be leaning more towards the independent route
52:20
because now, it's actually becoming a viable option and
52:23
some rappers. I think a musicians have
52:26
actually successfully made it. Independent is hard because
52:31
obviously a label can give you so much as far as access to
52:34
resources and stuff like that but now a lot of people would
52:38
just opted to go for say like distribution deals and stuff
52:40
like that, but where do you sit on that whole situation?
52:45
Well, I mean record labels do really help you out because they
52:48
have money and when you're an independent you have to then
52:54
find this money from nowhere and it costs a lot.
53:00
It costs a lot of money, it costs a lot of money for
53:02
production and it depends how many musicians you have involved
53:05
in it as well. You've got the producer fees on
53:07
top of that, you've got Studio fees.
53:10
If you need that sometimes, you don't always need that.
53:14
And then on top of that, Excuse me, you've then got your
53:16
videographer, 's and everything else that's involved.
53:19
The most the most expensive part in the process is actually
53:26
promotion. It's the promotional part and
53:29
the pr. That's the most expensive part.
53:33
And if you're somebody, who is independent, who, You know,
53:37
usually have to work like maybe two or three jobs to be able to
53:43
afford this kind of stuff because it's difficult because
53:47
you have to, you have to work a lot to be able to get the money
53:50
to do what you want to do. But then you also need that time
53:53
to be able to be creative. So if you're going with a record
53:56
label and they're paying for it, then that's great.
54:00
But the problem is, if you don't sell those records, you have to
54:03
pay them back that money and you'll be landed with a big fat
54:05
hairy built. and that I know somebody that was left with a
54:10
50,000 pound bill, at the end of it because of the contract that
54:15
they signed, And fortunately enough, they knew somebody that
54:21
helped them, get out of it, but you know, that can happen.
54:26
So, I mean, there's pluses on both of them.
54:28
I mean, I would quite like to work with a record label to
54:32
experience it, just because I know that the videos would be
54:37
absolutely amazing as well. All the things that Lee's
54:40
illusions of grandeur that I have in my mind of how I want
54:43
things to go, would be far more achievable if I had somebody
54:46
backing. A place.
54:47
They have the resources of the, the promo companies, and the
54:51
PRT. And but it just comes down to
54:54
how much money you have to how far you can go.
54:57
The other thing about being independent is that you're in
55:01
control of your journey and your music.
55:04
So if you want to put something out you can put it out.
55:09
You know it's not dependent on anybody else kind of saying yes
55:11
or no it just has to be good. It just has to be good.
55:15
It has to be later, born. It has to have a kind of a buzz
55:17
is to it. If you're with a record label
55:22
they can be quite strict and they'll tell you that they want
55:25
you to do a certain kind of thing or they'll get other
55:27
people that will be involved in that too.
55:29
So they might bring in some other producers or or writers on
55:33
it as well and if you're somebody that likes to write
55:36
from your heart like I write from my heart and I'm an emotive
55:39
person. So however I'm feeling will come
55:42
out on paper and or come out through sound.
55:45
If you've got somebody that's giving you Thing and saying,
55:47
right, you need to sing this. You need to complete this with
55:51
this feeling. It's a bit like well, I can't
55:53
connect to it. I don't know what I'm seeing and
55:55
if I can't connect to it, how am I going to expect my audience to
56:00
connect to this art? Because it's not my art, then
56:05
I'm not being true to myself. So that's that's a difficult
56:08
one. So I like being independent but
56:12
I could use the help of of a record label for sure.
56:17
I think it's a great perspective to have on it because as much as
56:21
it's easy to dog on labels and such they can offer you a lot of
56:26
resources that aren't otherwise immediately accessible and that
56:31
can change your position overnight and see the funny
56:35
thing is as well once you've just got a little bit of
56:37
attention, that's it like you can work with that.
56:41
You can push with that, you know, but it's getting that
56:43
initial attention. That's hard.
56:46
That's really hard. you know, it's like Somehow you got a
56:51
click with people, you know, and you can be doing it for years
56:54
and years and years and years and years.
56:55
And then one day, it just clicks, you know, takes off and
56:59
you see it all the time. I've seen it happen to friends
57:01
of mine and it's amazing to see and especially when you know
57:05
them because you know, the journey they've been through to
57:07
get to that level and you hear that term like overnight success
57:11
but there's no such thing. It's like it in you will but you
57:15
can become a success overnight. But like the reality is there's
57:18
been many many, many years of hard work.
57:20
Behind the to get to that point where there's potentially an
57:24
opportunity. But yeah.
57:26
Now I wish you the best on that. I think you're very talented
57:29
musician and I have no doubt that you'll get signed up or
57:32
yeah. Even if you choose to do, just
57:34
do it your own way. Like I think at the end of the
57:38
day people resonate with, with the stuff that you talk about
57:41
and you know that much is clear from the following you have and
57:46
the support you have and just like the confidence you have in
57:49
yourself like that's an amazing thing to see Because confidence
57:56
in general, I know some people find it, threatening some people
58:00
find it intimidating, some people were accuse, you of being
58:04
arrogant or narcissistic for having confidence.
58:07
And I think sometimes people get the two mixed up like when your
58:11
narcissistic or arrogant that means you think you're better
58:13
than other people, or you have a too high opinion, but being
58:16
confident has nothing to do with that.
58:19
Being confident is just believing in yourself and Going
58:24
through with things, you know, and and and and it's hard.
58:27
It's like what we were talking about before with the Imposter
58:29
syndrome thing that never goes away.
58:31
Like I mean I can't speak for yourself but for me it's like a
58:35
constant battle where I'm always down myself.
58:37
I constantly think everything I do is terrible but I just put it
58:40
out anyway. I just keep doing it.
58:42
You know, occasionally you see people say like this is really
58:46
good. I really enjoyed this.
58:47
This was really good and that makes me feel better and it
58:49
helps, you know, but it's a process and it's Newest, and I
58:55
just think anytime you see someone who has confidence in
58:57
themselves, I look at that and I say that's a person who's worked
59:02
hard to get to that point where they can be that way and it's an
59:08
ongoing thing and it's just incredible to see.
59:11
So I wish you will the best with with your music.
59:14
You really deserve it. A couple of final questions
59:18
while we end at least the official podcast, but we might
59:23
have some questions afterwards if Lucy's willing to continue
59:28
the live after the actual podcast.
59:30
But I'm going to finish my thing first and then I'll pay
59:33
attention to you guys. What's the best advice you've
59:38
ever received? Oh, cause there's been so much.
59:47
I mean, you've left that really open, you know, what we talking
59:52
about best advice that I think I have ever received.
1:00:01
Is do the things that scare you. Do the things that scare you and
1:00:08
every time I'm going to do something new that I haven't
1:00:12
experienced before. And whenever I get that real
1:00:15
fear of, and it might even be that I'm meeting up with to go
1:00:18
on a date with somebody or it might be that.
1:00:21
I just going somewhere new, that makes makes me a bit anxious or
1:00:24
I'm starting a new project or I'm talking to a new radio
1:00:28
station or something like that. And I just think if it's scaring
1:00:32
me, I know I'm on the right path because I know that I'm growing.
1:00:35
So, it's do the things that scare you.
1:00:39
Credible advice. Yeah, incredible slightly
1:00:44
different question but the same theme, but from your life.
1:00:48
What's the biggest life lesson you've learned so far?
1:00:52
Wow, the biggest life lesson. Oh, there's been so many.
1:01:02
Probably. Probably that.
1:01:11
That's a hard probably that you don't need everybody to love
1:01:17
you. Probably that you don't need
1:01:21
everybody to love you and that that's okay.
1:01:26
And I think that's a really hard life lesson because I think that
1:01:29
when you're growing up, I think you're thrown into this, this
1:01:35
kind of where you just have to achieve, your always have to
1:01:40
achieve ever since you were a child, you've always got to
1:01:42
achieve, you got to overachieve, you've got to, you've got to
1:01:46
pass these tests. You've got to be this particular
1:01:48
kind of person. You have to look a certain way
1:01:51
and that there's all these kind of pressures.
1:01:54
You know, and then what comes along with that is that you're
1:01:57
kind of told that if you do act, these certain ways and you
1:02:02
invoke these opinions, everybody else stars or whatever, then
1:02:07
you're immediately going to be accepted by everybody else in
1:02:10
society, everybody is going to like you.
1:02:13
So then when that doesn't happen, it's a real shock to
1:02:16
your system because you're just kind of running about the world
1:02:18
thinking like, yeah, everyone's gonna like me because I'm doing
1:02:20
exactly what everybody else does and that's not the case.
1:02:23
And I think It's knowing that, you know, it's don't expect
1:02:28
everybody to like you, that's cool, that's okay.
1:02:30
That's absolutely. All right, in fact, embrace it
1:02:35
embrace it and use it. You don't need everybody to like
1:02:38
you and that's cool. It might suck, but you'll get
1:02:41
over it and you'll be stronger for it.
1:02:44
Yeah, I couldn't agree more, I needed to hear that as well, but
1:02:47
particularly what I told you earlier, and it's because I
1:02:50
don't like it, too. Like, when I find people that
1:02:52
like me, it's like, oh, oh, oh, why?
1:02:55
Like, you know? But it's come on, look, we're
1:02:58
all different human beings, sometimes you just rub each
1:03:02
other the wrong way. Like, there's just an annoying
1:03:04
thing. You can't get over or, or you
1:03:06
have a particular perception as person you and you can't get
1:03:10
that out of your head, you know? And I think you raise a really
1:03:13
good point as well. In general about this this
1:03:15
concept of not being a people pleaser.
1:03:17
I've seen people that do that or have done that and what it does
1:03:22
to them. It's damaging its takes a lot of
1:03:26
your energy and It stops, it prevents you from being all that
1:03:32
you can be because you're so focused on other people and like
1:03:36
oh I hope they like what I say and I hope they like this and
1:03:38
they hope that that and it's like I feel in many ways like
1:03:42
with what we've chosen to do in life are particular, career,
1:03:45
paths and everything. It's like we've already made
1:03:47
that conscious decision to say. You know what is okay, if people
1:03:52
don't like us because it that's that's part.
1:03:56
And parcel of all of this, you know, I know that there's people
1:03:58
that probably less And so my podcast or see me do these
1:04:01
things and think I wish that guy would shut up.
1:04:03
I don't like anything. He says he sucks and that's fine
1:04:07
and you're a totally entitled to that opinion.
1:04:08
You know, I have opinions about people it's what it's what makes
1:04:12
us human you know? But at the same time, the point
1:04:18
you made is really important. You have to kind of reconcile
1:04:22
that with yourself and have that conversation with yourself and
1:04:26
accept and be like this is just part of Life.
1:04:30
And It's okay, like you said, it's okay, it's okay.
1:04:38
I always go by the rule of, if most people dislike you, you
1:04:43
probably need to change. Like, most people are like they
1:04:46
have a problem with you and that you keep hearing the same thing.
1:04:48
Again, that's something you need to work on, but if it's like one
1:04:51
person in like 50, come on, you know, if you're getting on with
1:04:56
everyone else, then it's probably all right, you know,
1:05:00
you just can't, you can't be friends.
1:05:02
With everyone. That's that's the reality of the
1:05:03
situation. Yeah.
1:05:07
But you know what, right? Okay, right, you need these
1:05:10
negative nancies in your life to be able to make you a bit
1:05:14
stronger and to just tear on ago.
1:05:16
Actually, no, I'm not going to listen to you and just be this
1:05:19
complete anarchists, you know? I mean, just been not.
1:05:22
Now I'm not having it. I'm not having it.
1:05:25
It's really a fresh refreshing that you choose to embrace.
1:05:27
So I really like that, I think that's something well.
1:05:32
I mean, to be honest, I feel like there's been a lot of
1:05:34
takeaways from this conversation that the people will look at and
1:05:38
be like, I can take this, I can take this, I can take this, but
1:05:41
I think the biggest thing that in terms of your message that
1:05:45
you offer to people, is your given people hope and belief
1:05:48
that they can be the best version of themselves and not
1:05:52
have to worry about what other people.
1:05:55
People think, you know, it's like you're very confident in
1:05:59
yourself and you've accepted that and you've embraced that
1:06:02
and as a result people resonate with that pit.
1:06:04
That's why I think that's why people like you a lot because
1:06:06
they're like, I like that. This person's real, they bear
1:06:08
their soul, but their Unapologetic.
1:06:12
They're like, this is me. This is who I am.
1:06:15
Take it or leave it and it's a good message to have.
1:06:18
We have to embrace who we are. We have to work on ourselves all
1:06:21
the time and be better. And, you know, we're going to
1:06:24
make Mistakes and we have to work through those and accept
1:06:27
them and own them and then move forward.
1:06:30
But fundamentally, we have to accept, who we are at our core
1:06:35
and fully Embrace that. And I think you've done that
1:06:40
successfully and it's just really amazing to see to be
1:06:44
honest. As we draw things to a close for
1:06:48
this podcast, do you have any upcoming projects or some final
1:06:52
thoughts that you'd like to share with our listeners?
1:06:55
So I am currently working on my third single full singles.
1:06:59
Forgot one. Then I've got my full single
1:07:01
which is going to be coming out. I'm just working on a car
1:07:05
waiting for the guitar Rift to appear and then that's going to
1:07:11
be coming out. I'm going to be starting that
1:07:12
project so that should happen. Hopefully in the next kind of
1:07:17
couple of months I'm giving it. I've also got a children's book
1:07:23
that I am written that I am, that's another project.
1:07:29
So that's going to be coming out at some point this year is well
1:07:33
where that's going to be. That's right at the beginning.
1:07:35
I'm looking for an illustrator at the moment.
1:07:38
So, so that's projects going to be coming out.
1:07:42
I've also got a art photography book which I am hoping to get
1:07:48
out as well. So there are there's quite a few
1:07:52
things that I'm planning. Running at the moment that's
1:07:56
it's all just kind of at the beginning but it's all really,
1:08:00
really super exciting stuff and maybe some other bits and Bobs
1:08:05
as well. But that hasn't been decided
1:08:07
just yet but there's some gigs coming up to.
1:08:10
So you guys can all come into my gigs if you check me out on all
1:08:13
my socials. So you'll be able to find it on
1:08:16
their excellent. Well, I wish you the best of
1:08:20
luck with all of those things. Really exciting news.
1:08:24
Very happy for you. And yeah, just want to say
1:08:26
absolutely a massive, thank you for being on the show.
1:08:30
It's been a real pleasure speaking with you and just just
1:08:34
tapping into your mindset. You know, like I keep saying
1:08:38
this I this must feel like a dead record right now for anyone
1:08:41
that listens to the podcast. But look, I love having
1:08:45
conversations with people and hearing about their life stories
1:08:49
and learning from them. And it's inspiring, it really is
1:08:53
and I think The anyone listening to this?
1:08:57
Will be inspired by it by your message, by what you're doing.
1:09:01
And hopefully we'll have the confidence within themselves to
1:09:04
pursue what they want to pursue in life.
1:09:06
You know, and have confidence in general and I think it's just a
1:09:12
really fantastic thing to see and it's been a real pleasure
1:09:15
talking to you. So I just wanted to say thank
1:09:16
you for being on the show. You're so welcome, you're so
1:09:20
welcome. We can do it again sometime if
1:09:24
you like maybe a bit further down in the year we can have a
1:09:26
catch up but thanks so much for having me on.
1:09:28
It's been awesome. I enjoy talking with you.
1:09:32
An absolute pleasure and as always to my listeners of the
1:09:37
Christian re podcasts, thank you for listening.
1:09:39
I hope you enjoyed it. Be safe, be well and I'll see
1:09:43
you in the next one.