Latest / The Hauraki Big Show / OUTRO: Buffoon Chat

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OUTRO: Buffoon Chat · The Hauraki Big Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, fan of the Hurdarky Bigture podcast.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: To make sure you check.
• 0:07
  Speaker 3: Out more from Jay, Smike and Kezy on their Instagram
• 0:09
  Speaker 3: at Hadarky Big Show.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: Fortune into Them four to seven every weekday on Radio Hadarky.
• 0:17
  Speaker 4: Thanks mate, Thanks mate, Thanks mate, Thanks guys.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: You know what what does? Give it a hoon that
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: rings a distant belt.
• 0:26
  Speaker 4: Well, that's what our whole station is. Give us a home,
• 0:30
  Speaker 4: give us a ho Yeah. Do you think it was
• 0:32
  Speaker 4: a new promo?
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: I assumed.
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we're doing two live shows next week.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: You could.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: I thought it was three actually.
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: Three ones from a food called at Sylvia Park. Yeah,
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: good ones from a wild bean.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: Cool And.
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: To be honest, have a hoon is more the way
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: I've used it in the past.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: Give it, give it, you know you.
• 0:55
  Speaker 4: Have I always sort sort of give it a whon
• 0:57
  Speaker 4: was sort of love making related.
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: Do you have a hon on?
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah? I have a hon on?
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: It your messes eyes to the frontsy bloody hell. It
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: was a full scam.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Then, that was a full keasy doe eyed scam.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Was giving because Jason, we were giving up what I
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: like to call the hoidy.
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: J Yeah, thank you, Mogi, Come on, Jason, was originally
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: this morning, got a text say he wasn't going to
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: be here today had a medical issue. Boy, I'm glad
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: you're backed, Jason.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: Can you talk us through it because I don't know?
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: All right, Well, it actually happened yesterday, but.
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: You didn't want to go on about it.
• 1:38
  Speaker 4: And I had quite a painful arm pet, in fact,
• 1:44
  Speaker 4: a very painful arm pet. That's why I was so
• 1:47
  Speaker 4: sort of grumpy and short temper yesterday happier and yes
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: and then when I woke up this morning, she was
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: a full blown golf ball.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: Bigger than a golf ball. Actually, I'd say, ah, as.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: Big as a house cricket ball.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: If I if I showed it to you fellers under
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: my armpit here, you.
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: Can we see it? Please?
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: No way I'm showing you.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: Can we please see your No way I'm showing on
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: social no way.
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: Can we get the pants man in here to take
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: a photo of it?
• 2:19
  Speaker 4: And in fact, and and a big rash down my arm,
• 2:24
  Speaker 4: and I was in a fair amount of pain, and
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: I went, I got to get this scene.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: Too, because that's good for you, because because I had
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: I think I had.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: A bit of an infection on my shoulder from a
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: scratch that.
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: Itchy, and I think it spread around and went under
• 2:38
  Speaker 4: the armpit there, and so.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: It was quite funny. But I don't know if I
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: can say this order. My wife works at a medical
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: center and I rang her up and I said, Darling,
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to go to a and e. I've
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: got a bit of an issue going on here.
• 2:56
  Speaker 4: And she said, oh, come to our place where she works.
• 3:00
  Speaker 4: We've got a walk in clinic, right yes, And I said, oh, okay,
• 3:04
  Speaker 4: sweet ass, So I d I drove down to her place.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: And walked into the reception there and said, Hi, there, blood,
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: my name's Jason.
• 3:15
  Speaker 4: I've got this thing going on. And apparently you guys
• 3:18
  Speaker 4: got a walk in clinic. And the receptionist said no,
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: and I went, ah, that's really weird because my wife
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: works here. And she told me that you guys had
• 3:28
  Speaker 4: a walk in clinic and she said, oh, who's your wife?
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: And I said blah blah blah, and she went oh no,
• 3:35
  Speaker 4: and I went, oh, okay, that's a bit weird. Then
• 3:39
  Speaker 4: sorry about that.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: She said, I'll tell you what. Just sit down.
• 3:43
  Speaker 4: And we'll get a nurse to see you and see
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: what's going on. And I went, oh, thank you for that.
• 3:48
  Speaker 4: I apologize I've got I misheard. Then I text my
• 3:52
  Speaker 4: wife and said, you guys don't have a walk in
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: clinic and she said, I never said we had a
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: walk in clinic.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: I said, Newland Health has a walk in clinic.
• 4:00
  Speaker 4: Your doctor and I went, ah my bed and she said,
• 4:04
  Speaker 4: oh Jesus, because it makes her look bad.
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: It does, you know what I mean? Really bad?
• 4:09
  Speaker 4: Actually, so then the nurse loctor a that and went Jesus,
• 4:14
  Speaker 4: and then she said Jesus yes. And then the doctor
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: she said, oh, see if I can get a doctor,
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: if not, you might have to go.
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: To New Lynn and I went out, that's where your work,
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: suggest ye bloody handy.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: Then the doctor looked at it and went, oh, fuck me.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: Did he say that's what? The doctor said?
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: No, he said that.
• 4:32
  Speaker 4: Must be very painful and I said, yeah, it's pretty
• 4:35
  Speaker 4: uncomfortable and he said yes.
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: What did you say?
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: And I went, I'm a backbone. I shut up and
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: get on with it.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: And then he wrote me out a prescription and some
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: stuff to put on my wounds and then said I
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: look at you weird.
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: So yeah, I mean wait, so you still haven't actually
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: gone to are you sure? He gave you a thorough
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: seeing over, and.
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: He was wearing a medical professional Okay, no, well he's
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: a doctor and he locked at it.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: As tool and had a lock and went, oh yea,
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: we might have to drain that.
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: Did he drain it?
• 5:15
  Speaker 4: No, but he said, well the medication, your douche, do
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: dooche for the first couple of doses and hopefully that
• 5:21
  Speaker 4: will reduce it, and then we may look at if
• 5:24
  Speaker 4: it's softened up a bit, we could drain it.
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: Can Can I be there when that happens?
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: No?
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: What about the pants man with the camera?
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: Pantsman in there?
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: Fuck the pants man?
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: You can imagine that thousand likes on Instagram video it
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: would be that would go off. I hope we could
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: do a live broadcast from you getting your own and
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: then I come in.
• 5:44
  Speaker 4: Here in our boss Toddy tells me a story he
• 5:46
  Speaker 4: had the same thing and nearly died. And so now
• 5:49
  Speaker 4: I'm feeling a bit woozy.
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: That is so I love. Yeah, he's like and I
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: feel slightly feverish, says like, Jason's going weird.
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: But what's interesting is the other day you were saying
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: you were feeling woozy, and then it came to nothing,
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: and now you're feeling woozy. Yes, fancy that'll come to nothing.
• 6:09
  Speaker 3: He feels woozy during the podcast and then forgets about.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right, but busy.
• 6:13
  Speaker 4: But my throat's feeling a bit. But you got you
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: gotta add into this. My daughter's been ready crop.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, as related.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: I don't think it is either. So you want to
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: edit in anyway.
• 6:24
  Speaker 4: I've got a feeling it's going to add itself. And
• 6:28
  Speaker 4: I think because my wife was coming home. When my
• 6:32
  Speaker 4: wife came home from work today, she was feeling.
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: A bit woozy.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: And she is a backbone. She is an actual back
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: She's an actual backbone.
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but because because her husband just came to her
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: place of work and acted like a buffoon in front
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: of it.
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: The Whole Archy Big Show week days from four on
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: Radio Hurarchy with the Whole Wracky Big Show podcast.
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: That was really funny because I was saying to that,
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: I was like, I am so sorry. This isn't my
• 6:59
  Speaker 4: wife's fault. I completely misheard what she said, and he
• 7:02
  Speaker 4: was like, oh no, that's all good, that's all good.
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: It was very quick, five minutes in a lock and
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: then he type typed out the prescription and.
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: She was going to get a promotion that's gone there. Yeah, probably,
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: I do like the idea of buffoon chat buffoon is
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: really good. That's not just for you, Jose, for me
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: as well. What buffoonery have I been out too lately?
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: Probably the most recent is you're dropping your phone in.
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: Your poos and the ship.
• 7:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that was a good That is so bewildering to me, Like,
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: I just well.
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: It was in my back pocket.
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: I can totally see how it's in my back pocket.
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: And then wallet pocket almost yeah, right pocket.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: Generally i'd be on my phone, so I don't know
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: what's going on there, but you were on your wallet,
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: but I was pulling my pants up and obviously it
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: then was half hanging out and then just straight to
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: the ship, did you f and Jeff, I'll be honest
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: with you had a couple of beers and I didn't
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: really care.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good thing about a few beers.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: Horrified otherwise you So the end of it was sticking
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: out the phone was of the phone was sticking out,
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: so I didn't have to get shitty air his fingers
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: and then in the basin and then straight into the
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: I just flushed the toilet and then flushed it again
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: and held my phone in there. And then because I
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: was hanging sort of bent over the toilet, I felt
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: sick and I puked all over my phone. Yeah, straight
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: in the basin, And then I was worried about it,
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: fucking out proof? Aren't they? Yeah? Water resistant? So I
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: was I thought, if ever there's a phone on the
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: planet that's not more resistant, it'll be mine.
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: Yes, But yeah, to do are they resistant? Though? That's
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: the thing you want to check?
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: Well, they seemed to be. I think a little bit
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: of ship got stuck in the microphone. But because how good?
• 8:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because he called me this morning, I was talking
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: ship and my breast ship.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: I couldn't decide. Jo walked walking.
• 8:57
  Speaker 4: Around the house looking at the soles of your feet
• 8:58
  Speaker 4: all the time while you're on your phone.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: Shit smell coming from.
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's horribly because I fixate on weird ship like that.
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: So like, for example, I had to recently. You know
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: how the toilet seat gets wobbly, Yeah, I've got that,
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: And so I was like, right, I've got to fix it.
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: My parents are coming to stay, and my mom's sliding
• 9:17
  Speaker 3: off my exactly.
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: That's when you do things right.
• 9:20
  Speaker 3: And so I had to pull it apart. And the
• 9:23
  Speaker 3: idea that I have been pissing and shedding into this
• 9:25
  Speaker 3: thing for like years, and now I have to get
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: hands on with it. And so I just washed my hands,
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: wash my hands, get in there, do all the work,
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: do all the work, and then instantly wash my hands twice.
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: And I had to do it twice because the first
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: one just gets the worst of the bat bugs off.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: Well.
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: I did a weird thing, true story, in the toilet today.
• 9:42
  Speaker 4: Actually it was pretty buffoonery. I sat on the toilet
• 9:46
  Speaker 4: and I was taking my morning dumb and.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: I went and I went, this feels weird.
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, you forgot to take your pants for
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: forgot to t.
• 9:57
  Speaker 4: Now I take my pants down, but I had it
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: was up. I hadn't put the seat down. I was
• 10:03
  Speaker 4: just sitting on the rim of the toilet.
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, the moment that your legs hit it.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: Well, I was a bit distracted by my impending death.
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: So you're sitting in the toilet with your golf ball, but.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: I'm not in the toilet. I was just around the rim.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: I just like hanging back there like a little Kidlet Hey,
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: I've got a question. For you then keys, what kind
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: of toilet have you got? Because the players we've moved
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: into that has got a similar thing happening with the seat,
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: but it's one of those ones where you can't get
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: to the screws because it's totally enclosed.
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: Ah to adjust it. Yeah, it's probably like a clip
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: thing that you have to like force up and click
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: off and then you'll be able. That's what mine has
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: is to cap cover things. Oh yeah, right, it depends.
• 10:50
  Speaker 3: It's like silver.
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah on the top, yeah, because generally you just reach
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: underneath the sea. Yeah, but it's fully enclosed.
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so the top ones, it's literally pop the caps
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: off and tighten those screws.
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: Okay, because that fucking annoys me. The other thing that
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: also annoys me about this toilet that we've got, it's
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: a very very small horse one, you know, so when
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: you sit down on the toilet, you're you're the wall.
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: Your knees are against the wall. Oh yeah, that's yeah,
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: And so it's not comfortable. Also, I sort of find
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: myself turning not quite at a forty five, maybe a
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: thirty eight, thirty seven, just towards the door a little
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: bit to give myself some knee road and then that leaves.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: Every time I go to the toilet there is just
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: shit all over the walls, but all up the side
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: of the toilet, you know, because your angles. I don't
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: like it. Yeah, anyway, I don't know if there's anything
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: to do.
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: About that dry broke there.
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: If I just twist my anus around. Oh have you
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: tried dropping your phone in it? I'll give that a
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: go tonight. Actually, I'm going to have your beers and
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: do a ship. Sorry everyone out there, it's a gross
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: when people talk like that.
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: Hey about happy Matiliki though.
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: Years it's going to be great.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: So good?
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: What are you guys doing?
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: I like him? How honestly? How was How was the
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: weather today?
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: Beautiful?
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: Beautiful?
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: Cold?
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: Actually, well that's probably because could you feel it in
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: your golf ball?
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: Man?
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: You feel it in your golf balls.
• 12:26
  Speaker 4: My golf ball feels your flesh balls burning and sharp painy, Well.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: That means we're going to have a beautiful That means
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: that's a portent. If I can say that Jay's important
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: for the year to come, that are going to have
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: a burning and it means it's going to be a
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: great year for me and Kesy. You're you're you're knocking
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: on this door.
• 12:47
  Speaker 4: I feel like I am now, and I'm quite concerned,
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: and my throat's gone all weird.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: I tell you what. Over the course of the show,
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: we're going to make you feel so much better about it.
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: Hey, but yeah, just keep an eye on me.
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: Just see if I change color or something, you know,
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: like if I'm suddenly pale or whatever, because I am
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: suddenly very husky.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: No, you're great because you've been punching darts after Toddy's
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: story about him almost dying.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: No, because I didn't bring my dance with me. I
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: would have. If I had a head a dart, then
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: I would have had a dart.
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: When you sat in the toilet this morning, I didn't
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: sit in it.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: I sat on it.
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: Do you have a shower afterwards or have you got
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: toilet us right now?
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: No?
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: I generally doing my dump and then have a shower.
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's why you do it.
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the old midnight steamer truck.
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: That's good.
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: Anyway, Hey, thanks for listening to this great podcast. Listen
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: to The Hiducky Big Show four to seven every weekday
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: on Radio Hurdarky.
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: Thanks mate,