Latest / Chip Ingram Sermon Podcast / The Role of Spiritual Training in the Transformation Process

Transcript

The Role of Spiritual Training in the Transformation Process · Chip Ingram Sermon Podcast

0:11
Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram.
0:14
God taught me something a number of years ago
0:17
that literally took my spiritual life to the
0:20
next level. I mean, quite honestly, I was a pastor.
0:23
I was stuck. There were certain things that I
0:26
just didn't see change. And then I was introduced
0:29
to a concept. It was a concept called spiritual
0:33
training. It revolutionized my life. And that's
0:37
what I want to share with you today. You know,
0:40
no one walks into a gym once and walks out looking
0:43
like a bodybuilder. Chip Ingram learned that
0:46
lesson the hard way and discovered it applies
0:48
just as much to spiritual growth as it does to
0:51
physical strength. Today, he introduces the idea
0:54
that changed his own life. I'm Dave Drewy, and
0:58
here on Living on the Edge, we're continuing
0:59
our series called Free at Last, How to Break
1:02
Out of a Destructive Lifestyle. Open your Bible
1:05
to Ephesians chapter 4, verse 25, as we get started
1:09
with today's message from Chip Ingram titled,
1:11
The Role of Spiritual Training in the Transformation
1:15
Process. Despite some of the radical transformation
1:19
that happens early on in most people's Christian
1:21
lives, there's these nagging areas. There's areas
1:25
that you try and try and try and try and try,
1:28
but they don't change. Some of the outer... Big
1:31
stuff sometimes gets cleaned up, but you know,
1:34
those outbursts of anger or the workaholism or
1:37
pleasing people or codependency, or there's just
1:41
people that, you know what, you just find yourself,
1:42
you really love God, you're sincere, you're actually
1:45
reading your Bible, you're praying, you've joined
1:48
a small group, but there are just pockets or
1:50
closets in your life that you want to change
1:54
and you have tried very hard and you're stuck.
1:57
And what I want you to know is that we all have
1:59
areas like that. And the reason this is so important
2:02
is because how we think about that and how God
2:05
actually works to transform those things is different.
2:10
And most people don't understand how that works.
2:13
In fact, I would say probably the first 10 years
2:15
I was a Christian, I made some progress in some
2:18
of those areas almost by random chance, but I
2:22
couldn't articulate what happened or why until
2:25
I had a situation with one of my sons. My youngest
2:29
son, Ryan, he gave me permission, and this bench
2:32
is going to tell a story. I can still remember
2:35
sitting on the floor, and my son had what an
2:38
older translation says is a besetting sin. I
2:41
mean, he was a young guy, loved God. I mean,
2:44
at 10, 11 years old, he's getting up, reading
2:46
the Bible. He's leading worship by the time he's
2:48
in junior high. Although he doesn't like school
2:51
and he's not very disciplined, he's this young
2:54
guy with a great heart. But this besetting sin
2:56
is every little kid goes through a season of
2:59
lying, at least my four did, but they usually
3:02
grow out of it. But Ryan, this shortcut, this
3:06
besetting sin was, whether his homework was due
3:09
or he was supposed to do that, he got into a
3:11
pattern. He got into a habit of lying. In fact,
3:15
for like four years. And he was really good.
3:20
I mean, he would lie so much that he actually
3:23
would tell me later, Dad, I lied about everything
3:26
so much, I became convinced of my own lies. And
3:29
then I would ask him, so is your homework done?
3:31
Oh yeah, got it taken care of. And then, you
3:33
know, his report card would come or have you
3:35
talked to so -and -so? I mean, perpetual, I mean,
3:39
I disciplined him. I rewarded him. I grounded
3:42
him. If you're a parent and you've ever had one
3:43
of these things, you know, I did everything you
3:46
can do as a parent. And I mean, I was just frustrated.
3:50
And it put a real breach in our relationship
3:52
because then I never knew if I could trust him.
3:55
And in one of just like three years of this,
3:58
and I've done everything I can do, I'm literally
4:00
sitting on the floor. He's sitting on his bed
4:02
and a breakthrough came because as I'm sitting
4:05
on the floor and literally tears coming down
4:07
my eyes and tears coming, Ryan, I mean, you just
4:11
keep lying and lying and lying. And I remember
4:14
him looking down at me and says, dad, dad, I'm
4:17
trying as hard as I can. What do you do? I've
4:20
prayed. I've memorized a couple of verses. I've
4:22
asked God, I can't stop. What do you do when
4:26
you try as hard as you can and you just can't
4:28
change? And I remember in that moment, I thought
4:32
to myself, number one, I'm his dad and he wants
4:35
a really good answer from his dad. And number
4:38
two, I'm a pastor, so I should have a good answer.
4:41
And I'm thinking, I don't. What do you do when
4:45
you're trying as hard as you can and you really
4:47
love God and you're doing what you know to do,
4:50
you're in the scriptures, you're renewing your
4:52
mind, but certain things won't change. And as
4:56
he said that, and I'm feeling this overwhelming
4:59
inadequacy as a father and as a pastor to give
5:02
a good response, I'm praying one of the like
5:04
super quick prayers in your mind, oh God, give
5:06
me wisdom, give me wisdom, give me wisdom. And
5:08
he's crying and bawling and he's kind of looking
5:11
at me like, well, dad. And God brought something
5:13
to my mind. I'd been studying it privately, but
5:17
all the pieces came together in that moment.
5:20
I said, Ryan, relax. What? I said, relax. I've
5:24
got the answer. You do? I said, yeah, got the
5:28
answer. Here's what I want you to do. I'll pick
5:30
you up after school tomorrow. Load your gym bag.
5:33
I want you to put a pair of sweats, your tennis
5:34
shoes, everything in the gym bag. I'll pick you
5:36
up. Because what I had to teach my son was there
5:40
are certain things That no amount of trying harder
5:43
as sincere he can be will bring about change.
5:45
Certain things are going to require training.
5:49
And so I picked him up after school and we started
5:53
in the car. He goes, dad, we're not heading home.
5:54
I said, no, we're gonna go someplace different.
5:56
The time I had a good friend, he was Mr. Universe
5:58
for a number of years called, his name is Dave
6:00
Draper. And he owned World Gym there in Santa
6:04
Cruz and he gave me a free membership. And so
6:06
we walk into World Gym and hi Dave, how you doing?
6:09
And Dave's like. I mean, Dave. Now, please, here,
6:13
this is a gym, not a spa. There is no spandex
6:18
anywhere. In fact, there are guys with big leather
6:21
belts like this, and there's not a lot of machines,
6:24
and there's just a few cardio areas. This is
6:26
like free weights, big guys, lots of grunting,
6:30
probably a few steroids in the back room. And
6:33
I mean, and then they drop the weights, and it
6:35
goes boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And these
6:38
guys look like... They were born on these weight
6:40
machines. And so I walked in. I said, what do
6:42
you think, Ryan? They're really big. And, you
6:47
know, naively, I said, do you think they were
6:49
born that way? No, Dad. He said, I don't either.
6:52
Well, come here, son. So we'd been lifting in
6:55
the garage with his older brothers. I had him
6:57
lay down on the bench press. We got warmed up,
6:59
and I knew what he could lift, and so I took
7:01
about five to seven pounds on each end beyond
7:03
what he could lift. So I knew he could hold it,
7:05
but he couldn't lift it. And so I said, get down,
7:07
son, will you? And so he gets down. I said, okay,
7:09
you ready? Let's do a few reps of this. Okay,
7:11
and okay, here you go. Okay, you ready, son?
7:13
Okay, okay. Press, press, press, press, press.
7:16
Okay, ready? Let it down. Okay, okay, now press
7:19
it up. And if you've ever done a little weightlifting,
7:23
and if you know it's just, you know when you
7:27
start to shake? So he's shaking. And now it's
7:31
coming down closer and closer to his neck. Closer
7:34
and closer to his neck. His mother would not
7:36
be pleased at this moment. And so as he's laying
7:40
down there and his face is red and it's coming
7:42
close to his neck, I get over him. And, you know,
7:45
I've got my hands in case, you know, I don't
7:46
want it to hit his neck. And I start screaming,
7:48
come on, Ryan, try harder, try harder, try harder.
7:51
And finally, it's like inches from his neck and
7:54
his arms are shaking. He goes, dad, I'm trying
7:57
as hard as I can. I lifted it off. I said, never
8:01
forget that, son. Then we sat there together
8:05
and he was like overwhelmed and sweaty. I said,
8:09
Ryan, let me ask you something. You see all these
8:13
guys, how do you think they got the way they
8:16
got? Well, I think they come here a lot. I think
8:19
you're right. I said, well, let me ask you, if
8:22
I would take maybe 10 pounds off each end and
8:24
you did three sets of eight or 10 today. And
8:28
it was a Monday. We come back Wednesday, you
8:29
do three sets of eight or 10. We come back Friday,
8:32
you do three sets of eight or 10. The next week
8:35
we come back and you do three sets of eight or
8:37
10 and maybe we add a pound or two. Do you think
8:40
in three months you could lift that extra five
8:43
or seven pounds on each end? Oh yeah, dad, I'm
8:46
sure I could do that. That's no problem. You
8:48
know, my older brother, Jason, he could only
8:50
lift about 130 or 40 pounds and he does almost
8:52
300 now. He was a wrestler. I said, Ryan, listen
8:57
carefully. You have everything in your body to
9:03
lift that weight, but no amount of trying hard
9:06
will lift that weight right now. You have to
9:09
go into training. You have to develop what God
9:13
has given you. And here's what I want you to
9:15
know. Some of your anger issues, some of your
9:18
addiction issues, some of your people -pleasing
9:21
issues, some of your alcohol and prescription
9:24
drug issues, Some of your workaholism issues.
9:27
Some of the issues that we all have that we all
9:30
kind of keep over here. And you're stuck and
9:33
you really haven't seen change. I want you to
9:35
understand no amount of trying harder. And we're
9:39
going to go into training. We're going to talk
9:42
about five habits that cultivate holiness from
9:45
the heart. See, there's certain things that when
9:47
you go into training, they literally become habits.
9:50
You have spiritual, supernatural responses to
9:54
certain things that right now are besetting sins.
9:58
There's a study done by Duke University. Did
10:01
you realize 40 % of all your behavior you don't
10:04
think about? It's called a habit. I mean, think
10:07
about, I mean, like, how many of you really thought
10:09
through very specifically how to brush your teeth
10:11
this morning? You've got it down. I mean it wasn't
10:15
like you got up. Okay now Okay, I think you pull
10:18
the brush out this angle carefully take the tube
10:22
off Can I got to work and see it? I want just
10:25
enough here put the water on lightly to sprinkle
10:28
under it Begin with the molars up and down 45
10:32
degree ink. Does anybody think about any of that
10:35
stuff? Now when you teach your two or three year
10:38
old to brush your teeth you do all that Habits,
10:42
the power of habit. Research tells us that every
10:45
habit has a cue or a craving. There's a routine
10:49
and there's a reward. Your besetting sin has
10:53
become a habit in your life. It's just like when
10:56
God wanted to do an amazing, miraculous thing
10:59
with the children of Israel, certain things,
11:01
he has this big deliverance. And so you see his
11:04
power. And then. There's a process and a journey
11:08
where your character gets developed, but there's
11:10
sort of a grinding it out and doing things over
11:13
time that become a habit. So when God takes the
11:15
children of Israel, what happens? What's he do?
11:17
The miracle, the Jordan parts, Jericho, dramatic,
11:21
falls supernaturally. And then for decades, what
11:24
do they do? For decades, they get up and they
11:27
go into training and they do battle. And inch
11:30
by inch, they take more and more territory. And
11:33
that's a good... picture of sanctification, what
11:35
happens in our lives. And so I'm going to help
11:37
you begin to break some of those habits that
11:40
you don't even think about, begin to analyze
11:42
what's really going on. And as you do these,
11:44
they're very critical. First and foremost, here's
11:48
training station number one. The bench press
11:51
of spirituality is this. It's be honest. Speak
11:56
the truth in love. Paul picks up where he talked
11:59
about in verse 15, where he says, speaking the
12:02
truth in love, we're to grow up into all aspects
12:05
into him who is the head, even Christ. Therefore,
12:09
verse 25 then, he's gonna make the application.
12:12
Laying aside falsehood, speak the truth, each
12:15
one of you with his neighbor, for we are members
12:17
of one another. Spiritual training station number
12:21
one is honesty. Personal integrity. This isn't
12:25
just your speech, but all aspects. Honesty, integrity.
12:28
How you live, what you say, but especially, you're
12:32
gonna put off falsehood. Your training command
12:34
is to speak the truth in love. Speaking the truth,
12:41
but doing it in love. Not speaking the truth
12:43
to hurt people. Speaking the truth to build relationships.
12:47
The training action is you put off falsehood.
12:51
And this word falsehood is well beyond, this
12:54
isn't just lying. The word falsehood has the
12:57
idea of speech, deceit, exaggeration, the falsehood
13:01
that comes from white lies, the falsehood of
13:05
silence. Aren't there times where someone's saying
13:08
something and you completely disagree, but in
13:11
your silence, you communicate that you agree
13:13
with them? It says put off falsehood. Then notice
13:18
the renewal is you recognize your shared membership
13:21
in God's family. Put off falsehood, but notice
13:24
the difference in thinking. With your neighbor,
13:30
for we are members of one another. See, at the
13:36
end of the day, the reason why Ryan lied to me,
13:40
because it always produced short -term relief
13:43
and then long -term consequences. I didn't do
13:46
my homework, but I lie about it so I'm not in
13:49
trouble right now. But the one thing that it
13:52
did in our relationship is what? It violated
13:54
trust. The commodity of every human relationship,
13:59
whether it's parent to child, whether it's your
14:02
marriage partner, whether it's a friend, whether
14:05
it's a roommate, whether it's a business, the
14:07
commodity of every relationship is trust. Once
14:11
trust is gone, you have no relationship. Once
14:15
you lie to me a few times, one, I will not trust
14:18
what you say in the future. And number two, I
14:20
will not vulnerably reveal anything about my
14:23
life because what I know is you can't be trusted.
14:26
When you lie, when your life is falsehood, either
14:29
by your speech or your actions, you can't be
14:31
trusted. Relationships can't grow. The apostle
14:34
Paul is using the human body and he says, just
14:37
as we're members of one another in the body of
14:39
Christ, I mean, think about if your hand and
14:42
your eye and your foot begin to lie to your brain.
14:44
If something was hot and your hand got on something
14:47
hot and it told your brain it was cold, what's
14:49
gonna happen? Pain. And he's saying to you, you
14:53
have to rethink. You are thinking only about
14:56
yourself when you lie, when you have less than
15:00
the truth in relationships, when you exaggerate,
15:02
when there are these little white lies. What
15:05
you're doing is you're avoiding some front -term
15:08
pain, but what you're doing is you're eroding
15:10
trust. And little lies in marriage end up over
15:14
the years big lies. And when your words say one
15:18
thing and your behavior says something to your
15:20
kids, they say, I don't not only believe in you,
15:22
but I don't believe in your faith. At a certain
15:25
time, remember, you have to make a decision.
15:29
Delete. Then you have to run a new program. And
15:32
the new program is, I'm going to be honest in
15:35
everything all the time. And you have to go into
15:37
training to become an honest person. Now, some
15:41
of you are thinking, well, I'm an honest person.
15:43
I don't like... do any big lies and I've actually
15:47
reported everything on my taxes. Well, let me
15:50
probe a little bit on some of the exaggeration
15:53
and some of the white lies and some of the small
15:56
ways. Because Luke 16, 10, you might jot that
15:59
in your notes. It's a financial passage, but
16:01
it's a timeless principle. It says, he was faithful
16:04
in a very little thing, will be faithful also
16:07
in much. But he was unrighteous in a very little
16:11
thing, will be unrighteous also in much. How
16:14
many times have you left late for something and
16:17
there's a little bit of traffic and you walk
16:19
into work or to someone and you say, oh, well,
16:21
the traffic was really heavy. Well, the traffic
16:23
was really heavy, but you're late not because
16:25
the traffic's heavy. You're late because you
16:27
left 15 minutes late. Well, that's just a little
16:30
lie. Or how many of us exaggerate? We just exaggerate
16:35
in a little bit here and a little bit there.
16:38
Little lies, little exaggerations. What I can
16:41
tell you is we have all grown accustomed to doing
16:44
that at such a level. We just give one another
16:47
a pass. Truth. Integrity. See, what we then do
16:56
is then we lie to ourselves. You know, I don't
16:58
really have a drinking problem. I don't. really
17:01
please people that much. I don't think I'm a
17:03
workaholic. I just have a lot of energy. I don't
17:06
think our marriage really is in trouble. I think
17:09
she's just going through a season where she needs
17:10
more attention. Lie, lie, lie. When you don't
17:14
ruthlessly say, I'm going to go into training
17:17
to be honest with God, honest with myself, and
17:20
honest with others 100 % of the time. When you
17:24
do that, I will tell you, it will bring about
17:26
transformation in those besetting sins. I was
17:30
early married and I happened to marry someone,
17:35
not all positive, and she would say this, whose
17:38
integrity is like off the charts. In fact, so
17:43
literal at times that she kind of misses the
17:45
point. And I'm sort of one of those big picture
17:50
people and big picture people have a tendency
17:54
to just sort of generalize. We don't call it
17:57
lying. We call it. generalizing. We call it rounding.
18:01
If you've been around, no, hey, by the way, I
18:03
love you, but you know, people in sales, people
18:06
in leadership. So, you know, you frame things
18:08
in a way that's just a little, you know, and
18:11
so we were in this little church. We just started
18:14
out. And so we, you know, like 35 people in the
18:18
church and we got all these neighborhood kids
18:20
in a club and we had them over on a midweek and
18:22
had a little midweek thing on Wednesday. And
18:24
I was announcing to the church the progress of
18:27
God, how encouraging it was and said, we had
18:29
like 62 kids last week and, you know, or something
18:32
like that. And I get in the car and my wife's
18:37
real quiet. What's wrong? Why did you lie today?
18:40
What do you mean lie? Well, you said they were
18:42
like. 62 or 69 kids and they were like 50 some.
18:46
I said, I rounded. I said, well, how do you round
18:50
from like 58 to 62? I said, up. And what I found
18:58
was in little numbers and in little ways or,
19:01
you know, I'm going to be about five minutes
19:03
late and it's 15 minutes late or this is what
19:06
happened. I found that I exaggerated. Well, I
19:08
mean. You know, I'm a young pastor and I'm just
19:11
starting out. Like every week for the first six
19:13
or eight or 10 weeks, I mean, she's real quiet.
19:16
I mean, in every message there was something
19:18
where, and she would, why did you lie? And I'm
19:23
just thinking, is this gonna be the rest of my
19:26
life? And then God says, well, probably if you
19:30
keep, why do you have to exaggerate? Why do you
19:34
have to try and make me look better? Or is it
19:36
really about making you look better? What would
19:39
happen if you were ruthlessly honest in every
19:42
area of your life? How many times has someone
19:45
said something to you and hey, we really ought
19:47
to get together and this is a great idea, I think
19:49
you'd love to do it and you say something like,
19:51
yeah, let's really get together sometime and
19:52
yeah, I think that's a winner and down deep,
19:54
the moment they walk out of the room, you're
19:56
thinking, man, I would never do that and I don't
19:58
want to take that person's phone call in the
19:59
future. But what you did is you did a little
20:03
covering and you acted like you were interested
20:05
because it would take a lot more courage to say,
20:08
you know, that's an interesting idea. I don't
20:10
really think that is for me and I'm not really
20:12
interested at this point in time with my other
20:14
priorities of being involved in that. And so
20:16
we lie all the time. We say things we don't mean.
20:21
We present ourselves as better than we are. That's
20:24
falsehood. But when you do that, I want you to
20:27
know it's a disease and it grows. And deception
20:31
happens in your own heart. And then pretty soon
20:34
you don't see yourself the way you really are
20:36
and you don't see God the way he is and things
20:38
get more cloudy. And the problem with these kind
20:41
of things is they grow and things that are little,
20:44
little, 10, 12, 15 years later, they're big things.
20:48
And so God says go into training. And so you
20:51
put on truthful speech and authenticity. Well,
20:54
how do you do that? I mean, how do you make the
20:55
break where that really occurs? In the same season,
21:01
God hammered me on this and it was really life
21:03
transforming. When I said that I learned this
21:05
sort of by random, God brought some circumstances
21:07
into my life where I learned this training apparatus.
21:12
And the training apparatus here literally is
21:15
practice confession. It was during the same time
21:18
and I was pastoring a little church and I'm finishing
21:20
up seminary and I'm in seminary and as I walk
21:22
the halls of seminary, being the basketball -holic
21:25
I am, in the halls is a 6 '11 guy and I find
21:27
out he plays at West Virginia. There's a 6 '8
21:30
guy from Wisconsin. There's a 6 '7 guy from Illinois.
21:32
And there's a 6 '4, 6 '5 guy from New Mexico
21:35
State. They all played college basketball. We
21:37
all played hoop together. So we formed a little
21:39
team. It was the most formidable intramural team
21:41
you've ever seen. And we had a blast. And I got
21:45
a call from the head of what was called Sports
21:48
Ambassadors. And I'd been overseas playing them
21:50
throughout South America. And then I did one
21:52
stint in the Orient. And Bud Schaefer, who's
21:55
the head of it, he goes, this was when China
21:57
was closed many years ago. You couldn't get in
21:59
China. We have an invitation to go to China.
22:02
We're gonna get to play all their national teams.
22:04
We're gonna play in all the major provinces.
22:06
And in small areas, they're gonna allow us to
22:09
share the gospel. Chip, I'm looking for two guards.
22:11
Are you in shape? Yes. Well, how many points?
22:15
I'm playing league right now. Oh, yeah. And well,
22:18
how many points? Oh, 10 or 12 points. Six or
22:20
eight assists. You know, probably three or four
22:22
steals. Wow, that's great. Well, I'll get back
22:23
to you. And I hung up the phone. And the peace
22:27
of God just dissipated. It was gone. See, the
22:30
fact is, in that little intramural league, we
22:33
didn't even have a scorekeeper. No one was keeping
22:37
track of points. No one was keeping track of
22:38
assists. I just rounded up. I so, now desire,
22:45
here's how habits work. The cue is, I want to
22:49
get something. I want approval. I want this.
22:52
The routine is, I exaggerate, white lie, present
22:55
myself falsely. The reward is, I get it occasionally.
22:59
It's a habit. So I said, oh Lord, I'm sorry.
23:05
Because I'm in seminary now. I'm preparing to
23:07
teach God's word to people. The truth. That's
23:09
ironic, isn't it? I'm preparing to teach the
23:11
truth as I lied to this guy about getting on
23:14
a ministry team to go teach the truth. Weird,
23:17
huh? Well, look in the mirror and it won't be
23:21
quite so weird. And so there's no peace. And
23:25
so it's, okay. Well, I know the verse, confess
23:29
your sins and he'll forgive me. So I confess
23:31
my sins. Lord, please forgive me and I hope I
23:34
get on the team. Two days later, still, I mean,
23:38
I can't. pray effectively and I have this guilt.
23:41
There's still no peace. And God whispers, I want
23:45
you to call Bud Schaefer, own your stuff, confess
23:48
your sin and apologize. Oh Lord, surely you jest.
23:54
I mean, I'm in seminary. Do you realize how embarrassing
23:57
it is for a seminary student to say he lied about
23:59
a ministry opportunity? And like this is the
24:02
organization and I've done things with them before
24:04
and I want them to think well of me. And I'll
24:08
never forget the phone call. I called, I said,
24:10
bud, this is Chip. And I want you to know the
24:12
statistics I gave, they don't really keep statistics.
24:15
So I made those up and I lied to you. And I'm
24:19
guessing you probably don't want someone on your
24:21
team that lies as a representative to share Christ
24:25
in China. And so he was a great leader. He didn't
24:28
gloss it. Chip, thanks so much for your integrity
24:32
and coming clean. You're exactly right. We really
24:36
don't want players. that habitually don't tell
24:39
the truth. But I think this is a great step.
24:41
We'll be looking for a couple other guards. You
24:46
know what I did? I went into training. And I
24:49
made a vow before God that when I lied, when
24:52
God made it aware that I lied in little things
24:54
or in big things to my wife, to another person,
24:58
in a sermon, I would confess it and actually
25:01
go to whoever I lied to and tell them. Now, I'd
25:05
like to say that, you know, that was like 25,
25:07
30 years ago. I can tell you I've had to do that
25:09
in the last two weeks because I'm in training
25:11
and you're in training. But I will tell you what,
25:15
by and large, I broke the power of deceit in
25:18
my heart and I broke the power of lying because
25:21
for 30 years, I've been in training to be honest
25:24
about exaggerating and white lies and presenting
25:27
myself. I was in a big meeting and I realized,
25:30
you know, it was a big meeting with these quote,
25:32
very, very powerful people. And I realized in
25:34
part of this meeting, I was posing and I had
25:36
to tell the guy, I'm sorry. I think I misrepresented
25:38
myself. You guys think way more of me than is
25:41
really true. Every time you confess and own it,
25:45
I will tell you what, you will not want to do
25:47
that because here's how habits, right? So the
25:49
cue is God shows me I'm being dishonest. The
25:52
routine is I begin to fest. The reward is I get
25:55
the peace of God. And you know what your stock
25:57
is? Your stock doesn't go down, your stock goes
26:00
up because trust is built. Everyone knows you're
26:04
not perfect, but we spend a lot of energy trying
26:07
to act as though or represented ourselves as
26:10
though we're better than we are, more holy than
26:12
we are, more loving than we are. Here's the deal.
26:15
You wanna see some change in your life? The foundation
26:18
of all spiritual training is be honest. Go into
26:23
training. Put off falsehood. Have your mind renewed
26:26
and realize that trust is the commodity and you
26:29
want to be close and connected to people. Put
26:31
on truth. And the practice is every time you
26:34
lie by thought, word, or deed, if it doesn't
26:36
hurt another person, own it. And where appropriate,
26:40
confess it. I will tell you what, you do that
26:43
for the next 30 days. By the way, if you decide
26:45
to do this, the next couple weeks is gonna be
26:47
rough. Because you'll find, oh my lands. Oh my,
26:51
I lied, I lied, I can't believe, I really do
26:53
lie. And you know what, you'll break the power.
26:58
You'll create a new habit. Pretty soon you will
27:01
tell the truth the way you brush your teeth.
27:03
It will be your automatic, supernatural, Holy
27:06
Spirit. inspired response to issues in your life.
27:10
And when you do, trust develops, power of evil
27:14
will be broken. The second training station is
27:16
not the bench press, but over here, you know,
27:19
if you go to the gym, they always say, okay,
27:21
we're gonna work on your, you know, like your
27:22
buys and tries. And here we go now, we're gonna
27:25
do some curls here. This is emotional control.
27:28
If there's any area in the world that destroys
27:31
our relationship with ourself, with God and others,
27:35
it's anger. It's when we either blow up or when
27:39
we stuff it or we leak it out and the emotional
27:44
side of anger can absolutely destroy our journey
27:48
with Christ. And so training station number two
27:51
is be angry. Deal with anger appropriately. Verse
27:57
26 and 27, it says, be angry, that's a command,
28:01
yet do not sin. Do not let the sun go down on
28:05
your anger. Well, why? And do not give or lest
28:08
you give the devil an opportunity or literally
28:10
it's a foothold or a crack or an opportunity
28:13
in your spirit and in your life. Put it where
28:16
it says be angry. The first word, put a box around
28:19
anger or angry and write number one above it.
28:23
And then where it goes on, do not let the sun
28:25
go down on your anger. Put a box around it and
28:27
put a number two because these are two different
28:29
words. There's two different kinds of anger.
28:33
Our spiritual training session, Number two is
28:36
the goal, emotional control. In other words,
28:40
we all deal with anger. How do we learn to go
28:43
into training to appropriately deal with our
28:46
anger? Our training command is to be angry and
28:50
yet do not sin. The first word for anger here
28:55
that's a command is the idea of anger, which
29:00
is a settled habit of the mind. that is aroused
29:04
by certain conditions. A settled habit of the
29:08
mind, there's certain conditions that would cause
29:11
you to be angry. Condition, injustice. Condition,
29:16
evil. Condition, a child abused. Condition, graft
29:22
or greed that hurts other people in the company.
29:26
Condition, someone abuses their mate and you
29:29
find out about it. Condition, disharmony or disruption
29:33
in a small group or church that's unrighteous,
29:36
that's bringing division. Condition, the present
29:40
sex trade. Or in my case, the condition. When
29:43
Christians don't live like Christians and people
29:46
outside of Christ look at the general body of
29:48
Christ and say, you guys don't live any different
29:50
than us. And they then think that God isn't really
29:54
God and they turn away from him because of how
29:56
we live. It makes me angry. By the way, anger
30:00
is a healthy, positive emotion to motivate for
30:05
life change. Jesus was angry with those in the
30:08
temple because of the evil and the injustice
30:11
and the graft. He was angry at the Pharisees
30:14
because of their hypocrisy. And he wasn't Jesus
30:17
meek and mild when he said, you brood of vipers,
30:20
you snakes, you whitewashed tombs. And his disciples
30:24
turned and said, Jesus, are you aware that you're
30:28
making them very upset? And they didn't know
30:31
the half of it. You're to be angry. When we're
30:36
supposed to be angry, we're often not, we're
30:38
passive. And when we're inappropriately angry,
30:42
the second word for anger here means to be irritations,
30:46
exasperation, bitterness, resentment. This is
30:50
the unhealthy anger. This is the kind of anger
30:52
that you have when you don't get your way or
30:54
people cut you off in traffic and you start down
30:57
this process in your mind. This is the anger
30:59
that you have when one of your kids isn't responding
31:02
in the way you want them to or you don't get
31:05
the promotion and all of a sudden you start brewing
31:07
and there's this resentment and anger. This kind
31:09
of anger is when your mate lets you down. And
31:12
she or he doesn't do what you want him to do.
31:14
This kind of anger when, you know, you have X
31:16
amount of dollars and the stock market does that
31:19
and you just start getting bent out of shape
31:21
and you're mad and angry and exasperated and
31:23
resentful. And it begins to eat at your soul
31:28
and you become a negative critical person. We
31:34
all have anger issues, but most of us think.
31:37
Only people that blow up have anger issues. Anger
31:39
is expressed in three primary ways. Some people
31:42
I call spewers. They explode. This was my father.
31:46
Part of my journey with my dad that made me afraid.
31:48
My dad was an ex -Marine. He was a big guy. He
31:50
was a strong guy. And when he got mad, it was
31:52
scary. I mean, hurrah! And boy, I mean, that
31:55
just exploded. And we think that that's anger
32:00
that's wrong. We've all been around people that
32:01
have exploded. It creates distance. We're afraid
32:04
of them. We withdraw. We don't have trust. A
32:07
second way that people express anger, some of
32:09
you learned, even from some of our churches,
32:10
unfortunately, that all anger is wrong and all
32:13
anger is bad. So whenever you had angry feelings
32:15
about something that was unjust or wrong, like
32:18
how come my brother or sister is being treated
32:20
like this and I'm being treated like this? Well,
32:22
that's anger. What you learned is you don't say
32:24
that, you stuff it, you stuff it, you stuff it.
32:26
So experts tell us that about 90 % of all depression
32:29
is anger turned inward. So much of the depression
32:34
that turns to migraines, that turns to ulcers,
32:36
is anger that's unresolved, that's stuffed down
32:38
in here. And then there's other people, they're
32:40
called leakers, passive aggressive. And this
32:43
is when you deal with anger and someone hurts
32:45
you or does something wrong and you're angry,
32:47
but what you realize is you don't have the courage
32:49
or the tools or the skill to deal with. I feel
32:52
angry right now about what you just said or what
32:54
you did. And so you take it from this sort of
32:56
unsafe playing field that causes conflict and
32:59
you bring it over here to what you think is a
33:01
safer playing field. And so you use sarcasm and
33:04
jokes and you're passive aggressive. So if you
33:07
know this person wants everything done neatly
33:09
and on time, Even unconsciously, you do it in
33:12
a sloppy way and you're late. And there's just
33:16
something satisfying about watching them get
33:18
all frustrated. See, everyone in this room, we
33:23
deal with anger. And anger is destructive in
33:27
your relationship with God. And notice, what
33:30
do you put off? We're to put off anger that leads
33:33
to sin and offense. And then we need to renew
33:36
our minds and recognize the dangers of unresolved
33:39
anger. I mean, I lived in Santa Cruz. I mean,
33:42
there's overt demonic activity and new age. And
33:46
we actually had a witch and warlock across the
33:49
street from the church. And they had a horse's
33:51
head on a pole. And we had people come that were
33:53
all painted up. We had overt demonic stuff. And
33:56
I've been to India and many places all around
33:58
the world. But I will tell you, the great majority
34:01
of demonic activity in Christians' lives are
34:04
unresolved anger. And it's that you get angry
34:08
because your spouse didn't respond lovingly or
34:11
kindly or there was a sharp word said. And because
34:15
you don't know how to resolve it and you don't
34:17
resolve it, then pretty soon bitterness happens.
34:20
And so in my case, Teresa and I had no idea how
34:22
to do this. Part of your family of origin teaches
34:25
of this. So I came from an alcoholic family and
34:28
she came from an alcoholic family. So when I
34:30
was angry, you know, I want to verbalize. I'm
34:31
going to talk until we get it done. She came
34:33
from, she withdrew. And so when early in our
34:37
marriage, we're really angry. And so here, you
34:40
know, you do what I called, you know, you finally,
34:42
you don't talk about it and you argue a little
34:44
bit and you hurt one another's feelings. You
34:46
don't know what to do. And so I would put my
34:49
hands behind my head as we're ready to go to
34:51
sleep. And I'd bounce on the bed like this. This
34:54
means, Teresa, you still have time to apologize.
34:57
The day's not over. And what I would hear from
35:00
her is, which is I completely withdraw and don't
35:07
like conflict because I learned that early on.
35:09
And we don't have to worry about apologizing
35:11
because tomorrow I'm going to pretend it didn't
35:13
happen. I'm not going to talk to you. I'm asleep.
35:15
And so I realized that then after the behind
35:18
the head, I need to go to what I called the bounce
35:20
and roll. And what you do is you sigh deeply
35:24
and loudly, you bounce, and then you turn this
35:27
way so that your posterior is next to her posterior
35:30
with a slight bump that wakes her up enough to
35:34
understand things aren't right and you can wake
35:37
up and we can deal with this and you can now
35:39
apologize. Unfortunately, most Christians have
35:46
conflict in your marriage, conflict with one
35:48
of your kids, conflict at work, conflict in the
35:51
church, a problem in a small group. We don't
35:54
understand. When unresolved anger isn't addressed,
36:00
you give demonic powers that specialize in lying
36:04
a foothold in your heart and in your spirit,
36:07
and it will destroy your relationships. The great
36:11
majority of divorces aren't because some big
36:13
thing happened. Here's what happens. Your heart
36:15
gets hard because you were hurt. And most of
36:18
us then after, what Teresa and I did is after
36:19
two days, we pretended it didn't happen and we
36:23
just acted like everything was okay. But a scar
36:25
occurred and it was sort of okay. And then another
36:28
scar occurred. And then finally, after about
36:31
two years, what you do is you start looking through
36:32
this lens and you look at your mate through,
36:35
every time they do this or that, you look at
36:37
them through this unresolved anger and bitterness
36:40
and you begin to connect dots that really aren't
36:42
there. She doesn't really care. She's incessant.
36:45
She doesn't respond. Well, he's like this. And
36:47
then this is what happens. And so again, I'm
36:50
in the midst of this and I'm in seminary and
36:52
I'm realizing, okay, first of all, I'm a liar
36:55
and I'm supposed to tell people about the truth.
36:56
That's not good. And so God brings this into
36:59
my life. And now I'm supposed to help people.
37:02
I'm in a pastoral counseling class of helping
37:05
people. And I learn about anger and how it actually
37:08
works. And I realize we don't know how, we have
37:10
no idea how to resolve it. It's impacting every
37:13
area of our relationship. So I go to the professor
37:15
and I ask for help. And the long story is, he
37:17
says, you know, I have a brother. who's a retired,
37:20
he had a heart attack. He's a retired senior
37:22
pastor, really knows the Bible. He's one of our
37:24
best counselors. And you have very predictable
37:26
problems from the kind of families you come.
37:28
You have no business saying anything to anyone
37:31
until you get these resolved. And so we'll give
37:33
you a special student rate of $85 to $95. And
37:37
you can see my brother for about 12 sessions.
37:40
And this is not rocket science. You can resolve
37:43
this. So I'm making $1 ,000 a month with three
37:47
kids. Going to school full -time, working full
37:50
-time. I'm going to tell you that $90 a week
37:53
for 12 weeks is the best investment I ever made.
37:59
And we learned how to go into training to deal
38:01
with our anger and how to express it appropriately.
38:05
And what I want to do now is I want to give you
38:07
that tool. Two tools. The training apparatus
38:10
is I feel messages. I feel messages. When Teresa
38:18
would shut down and I would talk or get very,
38:21
very angry, what we learned is we couldn't communicate.
38:27
And then it shut down everything in our life.
38:31
And so this feels a little unfair to me, but
38:34
I'm going to try and deal properly with my anger.
38:37
Because at a time when I didn't have any money
38:38
at all, I paid $90 a session to give to you right
38:42
now for free, which doesn't seem fair. But what
38:48
we learned, we put it on a three by five card.
38:52
And instead of you ought, you should, you always,
38:55
you never. Those are angry words when couples
38:58
or roommates or friends are fighting. You ought,
39:01
you should are how dads talk to their daughters
39:04
or how mothers talk to their sons. Those words
39:07
are disallowed in a marriage relationship. You
39:09
ought, you should. Or you always, you never.
39:11
Well, no one always or never does anything. See,
39:14
those are labeling things. So what you do is
39:17
you attack each other. You need a tool so that
39:20
you can attack the issue. And so what I learned
39:22
in my counseling was to make I feel blank when
39:26
you blank. We put it on a card. It was on the
39:30
refrigerator. I put it in my Bible. And so I
39:33
had to learn. I feel hurt. When you give more
39:37
attention to the kids than me. I feel disappointed
39:40
when I spend this time making supper and you're
39:43
always a half hour to 40 minutes late. I feel
39:46
like you don't love me and you don't care. I
39:48
feel disappointed when. I feel angry when you.
39:53
You get it? See, what it does is it takes those
39:57
issues and they come from your heart. And you
40:02
identify how you feel instead of attacking the
40:05
other person. We were learning how to do this.
40:09
And I perpetually felt like my life was overwhelmed.
40:13
And I would always seem like if she made a special
40:16
dinner, I would come home late. And I learned
40:19
over time, we always argued about this. And part
40:22
of it is the differences when you get married,
40:24
like when you are dating, I was adventuresome
40:26
and spontaneous and exciting. And when we got
40:30
married, I became irresponsible. When I was dating
40:33
her, she was consistent, godly, follow -through,
40:38
structured. After we got married, man, she was
40:43
rigid, unbending, no flexibility. And so you
40:47
start focusing on those things. And so, you know,
40:49
we would, she really wanted dinner at a certain
40:52
time and I would just blow through it, lose track
40:54
of time. But I did it over and over and over
40:56
and over and over. And so eventually I learned
40:59
when I'm really late, come in and be angry, pick
41:01
on her early because a best good offense is better
41:04
than a good defense. And so I'd find something
41:06
about her and attack her early on when I walked
41:08
in. You guys are smiling. Some of you guys have
41:10
known this tactic, right? Okay. And so then we
41:13
would argue and I'd feel justified. And you know,
41:15
here's what's happening, by the way, in our relationship.
41:17
And so I come in and I'm ready to get mad at
41:20
her because in the counseling, obviously two
41:22
or three sessions, it's not helping too much
41:23
because I'm not obeying it yet. And so I walk
41:26
in and you know, everyone's already eaten an
41:28
hour ago. There's two candles lit. There's the
41:31
food is on the plate and she's seated and I'm
41:34
kind of waiting for, okay, good. Come on. And
41:39
she was calm. She goes, here's your dinner. I
41:42
mean, I'm waiting for the attack. And she kind
41:46
of lets me get a few bites. And then she looks
41:49
at me very calmly and her eyes are watery. She
41:53
said, Chip, I feel like you don't love me when
41:59
I spend the better portion of a day preparing
42:00
something for you to express my love and you
42:04
disregard it and just come home an hour late.
42:07
This was my gift for you. I feel like you don't
42:11
love me. I'd never made the connection. To me,
42:15
it was a power issue. That statement began, I
42:19
just thought, wait a second. I may fight with
42:22
you, but I love you. If me being home on time
42:25
says I don't love you, I can change that. And
42:29
I mean literally very few times ever after that
42:32
message. Can I encourage you to begin to use
42:35
I feel messages? Can I encourage you to write
42:37
it on a card, put it on the refrigerator? And
42:40
here's what I can tell you. You have anger issues.
42:43
And some of you stuff, and some of you spew,
42:45
and some of you, the reason you have an addiction
42:48
is that's how you deal with your anger. The reason
42:50
you eat is because of your anger. The reason
42:52
you watch so much TV and play video games is
42:55
because of your anger. The reason you stay at
42:57
work is because of your anger. You have a habit,
42:59
and the cue is you feel unrest and difficulty
43:02
and pain. You've developed some routine negative
43:05
thing. That gives you the reward of feeling better.
43:09
Oh, I feel better. I ate for a while. I watched
43:12
this movie. I went on Netflix. I surfed on this.
43:14
I did that. I went out and helped these other
43:17
people because I didn't deal with my own stuff.
43:19
Those patterns are rampant in this room. And
43:22
God says, go into training. Go into training.
43:25
You go into training and say, you know something,
43:27
I'm gonna be honest. And then what I'm gonna
43:30
do, when I'm angry, I'm gonna identify I'm angry.
43:33
And it's gonna be hard and I'm gonna give an
43:34
I feel message. I feel hurt when you, I feel
43:38
disappointed. I feel used. I feel angry. And
43:44
you begin to address those issues. I feel angry
43:48
when we make a budget and you spend money that
43:50
we don't have. I feel hurt when the attention
43:55
is given to the kids and I realize we haven't
43:57
made love in three weeks and it doesn't even
43:59
seem to register. The other tool in anger is
44:04
make direct requests. Part of our anger is always
44:08
around expectation. Expectations are that we
44:12
think our mates think the way we think or our
44:16
friends think the way we think and they can read
44:18
our mind. And so it's like, I'm gonna be over
44:22
here and I've asked you to meet me and I'm doing
44:25
A, B, C, and D. Of course you're gonna do at
44:28
least A and B, right? And they don't. And then
44:31
we're angry. And then you say, well, did you
44:34
ask them to do that? No, you just expected it
44:37
to happen. And so you make direct requests. So
44:41
much of our anger is, I mean, even at work. You
44:45
know, you're working with someone and you're
44:46
doing this part of the job and they're doing
44:48
that part of the job. And you just expect that,
44:50
well, if I'm doing this, surely you're gonna
44:52
do that. But you don't ask them to do that. And
44:55
then they don't do it. And then what? You're
44:56
ticked off. And then you're ticked off and you
44:58
don't say it to them. You stuff it down or it
45:00
comes out in a meeting three weeks later. You
45:04
would be shocked at what happens. And again,
45:06
it takes courage and grace where you start making
45:08
direct requests. And so like back to our marriage
45:12
world, you make a direct request. If you're a
45:16
stay -at -home mom, you might say, Honey, I'm
45:19
glad and I understand you've had a hard day.
45:22
And there's been a lot going on. But when you
45:24
walk in the door, I want you to give me the first
45:27
five minutes of your day. And then rather than
45:29
ESPN or the Wall Street Journal, I need you to
45:32
play with the kids for a half hour to give me
45:35
a break. Direct request. Would you do that? Because
45:40
how long has that been making you angry? Or you're
45:42
a man and you say to yourself, I've been on the
45:44
road four days. We have soccer, softball, basketball.
45:49
Our weekends are blurred. We're this committee.
45:51
We went to church. And you know what? We've not
45:54
been together physically or had a romantic evening
45:56
for, believe it or not, ladies, guys, count the
45:59
days. 21 days, 7 days, 16 days. And you say,
46:03
direct request, I'd like to set aside one evening
46:06
a week where we put the kids to bed early and
46:10
we have a romantic time of really talking and
46:12
enjoying one another. And the guys are going,
46:15
I've always loved the body language. Well, that's
46:17
not very romantic or spontaneous like all the
46:19
movies. Well, how's your way working for you?
46:24
I mean, and you know what? Most women knowing,
46:27
okay, that's the request. They mentally think,
46:29
okay, that really matters to him. But here's
46:32
the thing. We don't talk to each other that way.
46:34
And if you don't give I feel messages and if
46:37
you don't make direct requests, you know what
46:38
you do? You will stuff, you'll explode, or you
46:42
have these habits. When you ought to be talking
46:46
to God or talking to someone you love or doing
46:48
something that's profitable, you're on Facebook.
46:51
Or you're watching meaningless stuff or eating
46:54
food that you don't need. And in Christian circles,
46:57
we kind of create all these kind of different
46:59
ways that they're, quote, not really sinful.
47:01
Well, they're not sinful and they're overtly.
47:03
violating some scripture, but they're sinful
47:06
in that you're not being honest with yourself,
47:08
you're not being honest with God, you're not
47:10
being honest with others, and you're not honest
47:12
about being angry and yet dealing with it appropriately.
47:17
Can you see what would happen in your life if
47:21
you said, okay, what's the area that I'm really
47:23
frustrated in? What's the area? You get real
47:27
with God. You don't have to tell anybody else
47:29
right now. And you would say, I've tried, I've
47:31
tried, I've tried, I've tried, I've tried. I
47:33
can't change. And you said, okay, what's the
47:37
feeling I have? What's the thing that I can't
47:38
change? And there's a reward. There's some reward
47:41
you're getting out of what you're doing. It's
47:43
usually temporary, short -term ease, long -term
47:46
pain and consequences. And if you said, okay,
47:49
for the next 90 days, I don't know how it'll
47:54
impact it. I'm gonna be honest. Little things,
47:57
big things with myself, with God. Anytime I represent
48:00
myself with another person in speech or action
48:04
that is not true, I'm gonna go to them as long
48:08
as it doesn't hurt them and I'm gonna confess
48:10
it. You do that two or three times this week,
48:12
I tell you, you'll be more honest than you've
48:13
been a long time because it's painful and ugly.
48:16
And here's the deal. It's like when I had to
48:18
go to marriage counseling. I still remember sitting
48:20
in that room thinking, I hope no one sees me.
48:22
Well, why? Because I'm proud. The reason I don't
48:27
wanna confess, my pride. The reason I don't wanna
48:30
apologize, my pride. When you go into training
48:33
on these things, God gets to the very core of
48:37
the core so that the life of Christ can be formed
48:39
in you. Question number three on your notes,
48:42
you'll notice here, it talks about, so what specific
48:44
area in terms of anger against others, yourself,
48:49
has been an issue in your life? Application.
48:54
Write on a card and start using I feel messages.
48:58
Are you willing to go into training? Here's the
49:00
deal. We've been talking about transformation.
49:03
The series is going to come. The series is going
49:05
to go. And you can either begin to do some of
49:07
these baby steps of training. You do this 90
49:10
days with me. I will tell you. Things will happen
49:13
in you that you never dreamed. Trying hard, no
49:17
matter how sincere, certainly won't break the
49:20
power of certain ingrained, habitual, besetting
49:24
sins. You have to go into training. You have
49:28
to go into training. It's like the person I knew,
49:32
42 years old, had never run in their life, had
49:35
a friend and said, you know, I want to run a
49:37
marathon. She couldn't walk three miles. She
49:42
changed when she went to bed. She changed her
49:45
diet. She walked three or four miles. Three months
49:49
later, she jogged 10. Six months later, 26 .2
49:53
without stopping. Everything she needed was already
49:59
in her. She went into training so that God could
50:03
do in and through her what he'd already deposited
50:06
physically. I want you to know. Everything you
50:10
need to become the Christ -like mother, father,
50:13
student, brother, sister, worker is already in
50:17
you because the Spirit is in you. And he'll use
50:20
his word and his people as you go into training.
50:24
And 90 days from now, you will see a significant
50:26
difference. My question is, are you willing to
50:29
be honest and ruthless enough to spot what's
50:32
the one area I want to do and go into training?
50:37
You're listening to Living on the Edge and a
50:40
message titled The Role of Spiritual Training
50:43
in the Transformation Process. We're in a series
50:46
called Free at Last. And if you want to find
50:48
more from this study, just go online to livingontheedge
50:52
.org. Yes, you really can change is the practical
51:15
companion to help you keep training right alongside
51:17
Chip's teaching. It's a clear, biblically grounded
51:20
look at what spiritual transformation actually
51:23
requires, where the power to change really comes
51:26
from, and what it looks like when it finally
51:29
takes hold. And right now, we're including a
51:31
second copy with every order, so you can work
51:34
through it alongside someone in your life who's
51:36
ready for a breakthrough. Just look for Chip's
51:39
book, Yes, You Really Can Change, online at livingontheedge
51:43
.org slash offers. Somebody somewhere is going
51:48
to hear a message like this one at exactly the
51:50
moment they need it. And that only happens because
51:53
of listeners who step up and give. If you've
51:56
been blessed by this ministry, would you help
51:58
make sure it keeps reaching people? Give today
52:01
at livingontheedge .org or call 888 -333 -6003.
52:07
You can also mail your gift to Living on the
52:09
Edge, P .O. Box 3007, Sewanee, Georgia, 30024.
52:16
Well, now here's Chip with a final word. As we
52:19
close today's program, I want to stop for a moment
52:21
because this is one that's like taking a needle
52:24
into a raw nerve when you start to tell people,
52:28
be angry, but don't sin. If you are struggling
52:32
with anger or if you know someone who's struggling
52:34
with anger, what I talked about, the I feel message
52:38
is a powerful tool. But there's a whole process
52:42
you need to go through because this is one that
52:43
when you start talking about anger, it is the
52:45
tip of the iceberg. What's underneath of it?
52:48
What God wants to do in your heart and in your
52:51
life when you begin to discover, you know, I'm
52:53
bitter, I'm angry, I'm resentful. Well, what
52:56
I discovered when I was teaching through the
52:58
Bible, James chapter 1 and this passage on Ephesians,
53:02
I realized what a big issue this was. I eventually
53:05
taught an entire series called Overcoming Emotions
53:08
That Destroy. But if anger is an issue, That
53:12
you're thinking to yourself, you know, I have
53:14
the shame that goes with that. I've got the guilt
53:16
that goes with that. Or my husband blows up.
53:18
Or I don't know how to respond to my boss. This
53:21
is a resource that people have told me over and
53:24
over and over again. Literally, some have said,
53:27
that saved my life. I mean, that turned my life
53:29
around. If we could be of help, let us know.
53:32
We would love to get that into your hands to
53:35
help you be angry but not sin. To follow up on
53:39
Chip's invite, just go to livingontheedge .org
53:43
slash series and look for the study called Overcoming
53:46
Emotions That Destroy. I'm Dave Drewy, and we'll
53:50
see you next time for more Bible teaching from
53:52
Chip Ingram here on Living on the Edge. Today's
53:58
program is produced and sponsored by Living on
54:01
the Edge.