Latest / The James Granstrom Podcast - Super Soul Model series / How to Model healthy masculinity with Supermodel & Mr Feelgood John Pearson

Transcript

How to Model healthy masculinity with Supermodel & Mr Feelgood John Pearson · The James Granstrom Podcast - Super Soul Model series

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: In this episode I speak with the world's first male supermodel, john Pearson.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: John's career spans nearly 40 years and in this conversation we discuss the topic how to model a healthy sense of masculinity.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Enjoy the episode.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to the James Grant from Polka SuperSoul Model series, where I help people tune and tap into their natural state of well-being.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: In this episode I'm super excited because I have a wonderful guest.
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: My guest is the original male supermodel from the 90s.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: He's a husband, he's a father and he's not only a model, he's also the co-creator of Mr Feelgood, which is a life and lifestyle magazine.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: This week's guest is John Pearson.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the show, john.
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: Hey James, Thank you.
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: Thank you for having me.
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: It was nice to see you.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: Absolutely Joy.
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: I've been modeling for over 23 years, while I've started in the year 2000.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: I'm happy that our paths have crossed along the way.
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: I just wanted to say what a joy it is to connect with you, because what you're doing is not only modeling.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: you're just starting to tap into this role model where there's this healthy sense of masculinity, which is really what I want to talk about in this episode today For the purpose of the audience.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: I want them to understand who you are, what shaped you, which we'll just ask in a split second.
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: I'm just intrigued on your journey of how you've managed to be in the modeling industry and in the game and doing all these wonderful shoots and campaigns for so long and yet still remained a very grounded, beautiful human being.
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: You're an argument.
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: That's it Game over.
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: How did you get into modeling in the first?
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: place.
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: I was working in the market from the age of 12 in the fruit market in Yorkshire.
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: I always worked for my money I didn't have a lot of money Then went into running a store selling sort of jeans, which was great.
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: I was a great salesman.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: I loved doing it.
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: It was a great time.
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: It was a great time A gentleman came in and said hey, you're good looking, i'm a photographer, can I take some pictures of you?
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: I thought, hang on, hang on my first instinct.
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: Then I thought, no, that's okay.
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: I went with my sister.
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: He took pictures for me.
• 2:27
  Speaker 3: I felt very comfortable in front of the camera.
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: It was just the three of us.
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: I really just naturally felt very comfortable in front of the camera.
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: I enjoyed it.
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: I was young and I was really into sort of Randall and James Dean and Montgomery Cliff and all that sort of crew and the rat pack.
• 2:45
  Speaker 3: I liked the way it looked.
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: It was something different On there.
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: My sister sent those pictures to a magazine called Look Now, which was kind of a fanzine, teeny-bopper magazine.
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: The editor wrote me an actual letter and said we love the way you look.
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: Do you want to come to London?
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: That gave me my first trip to London, which was amazing, my first trip to London.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: They've written you a letter back.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: I mean that's impressive.
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no, exactly, i've still got it.
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: People wouldn't do that these days.
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: What a vain blesser.
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: I went down to London, took a cab to the studio in Hampstead, went in.
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: I had tape recorders with me, tapes with me, so I kind of put music on.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: They're two beautiful French girls running around.
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: I was like, wow, that's kind of nice.
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: How old were you?
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: I was about 19.
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, ok, yeah, i had it.
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: It was fabulous.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: I had a great day.
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: I think they paid me 120 quid for the day, which was a lot of money then because I was making £2.50 in the market and I was making not much a week at the Jean shop Went back up.
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: That was great.
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: I was going to move to London anyway to go to drama school.
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: They called me again and said can you do the cover with a big model of the day?
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: I've got a name something, lisa Adams, i think she was called went down, did it again, moved to London and really didn't expect to do this.
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: I went into an agency, premiere, and met with Carol Wright, who's Carol Owen, forgive me Who's just been a friend ever since.
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: Within a couple of days I was booking.
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: It was fine, it was good.
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: It was bits and bobs.
• 4:18
  Speaker 3: I was still going to go to drama school.
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: I got the application for a Radar, but then suddenly I got a commercial which I think paid me £25,000.
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: I thought what Wow.
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: Were you still 19 at this time.
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: Well, i was 20, maybe, Yeah.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: You were changing money at that time of your life.
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: No, it was a lot of money Still is.
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: I went to Milan, i went to Japan, had a bit of cash from Japan and that bought me a ticket to go to New York.
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: I got to New York in November 4th 1986.
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: A buddy and I went.
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: Within two days I was on the cover of Self magazine with Uma Thurman.
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: I met Cindy Crawford It was her first week in in New York and the rest is history.
• 5:02
  Speaker 3: I didn't stop working for well, i've still worked.
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: But there was an intense part of 20 years where I just didn't stop, to the point where I used to take months and months off because it was just too much.
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: But anyway, that's super exciting and interesting because you were almost at the time when the culture was shifting, in 1990, you know that's when I noticed there was this Sky magazine that was out, that came out with a massive in the UK.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: Did you star in that?
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: Were you in that?
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, once.
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: I think my friend from Yorkshire, Simon Mills, was part of that.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: He was one of the editors There are writers there, and during that time, in 1990, if I'm not mistaken you were also in the video for George Michael in.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: Free Freedom Mainsea yeah, what a wonderful thing to be a part of in a cultural shift During that time.
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: So you've had all this success in modelling and we in my generation because I started in 2000, so you'd already been going and being we'd seen this sort of thing going from classic male modelling and obviously the female supermodels of Christy and Cindy and me and everybody, which are just beautiful and still to this day.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: I think is absolutely wonderful part.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: I had the privilege of working with Christy and a few others as well, but Christy lucky man.
• 6:25
  Speaker 3: She's an absolute gem and remains so to this day.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she grew up in Danville in San Francisco and I grew up in Walnut Creek for a few years, So we had something in connection there.
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: But I just my generation, stood on the shoulders of yours because what happened was, as culture shifted, this heroin sheik sort of came into the presence of the culture of fashion, which was different, because when I first started I was just a classical guy and that was nothing like that, And still to this day.
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: And so you try and find yourself trying to morph into this character which you're not, and I was like this isn't for me.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: And how you've managed to keep a sense of longevity, John, is really fascinating because for me in that time is just I noticed myself like really being self-conscious of, like what the industry was doing and like they were trying to get me to be like this really edgy guy which I wasn't, you know right.
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: And you realise that.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it took a little while to go.
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: hey, i'm not this guy, this is not.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: you don't want to book me because I'm not that guy But at the time you still feel as though you're wanting to be part of something.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: But I realised that my path was really just understanding self.
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: understanding.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: you know how I tick and what makes me who I am, and I think that's the most important part.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: And I've heard you say previously that you just always had this healthy sense of self, which I believe is this really important part of masculinity, of well-being in general, whether you're male or female, and how you've managed to sort of hold on to that sometimes when life around you is sort of pulling strings.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: It's a work in progress, you know.
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: I think the people that give out the positive usually come from a background which is anchored in trauma and sadness to some degree.
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: For me, i was just really excited early on just to get out and see the world and have an adventurous, interesting life, and I really also didn't consciously plan to be a male model or do this.
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: I just it kind of because I didn't care that much.
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: It happened for me.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: I was very free within myself And I've had this extraordinary career.
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: With regards to your reference to the sort of Korean daytime era and that sort of moment, i think I was just old enough to miss that.
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: I'd been that heartthrobbing kind of young gun in the late 80s and the 90s And when the 20s came I was a father, you know, and I was the 2000s.
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: I was a father And there was still a commercial market for, you know, regular straighty looking, you know guys.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: So I was good there.
• 9:15
  Speaker 3: But as far as the wellness thing, i mean, it's always it's been, you know, i've always been very interested in psychology and theology and all the way the brain works, the mind works, it's.
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: I read the Bible when I was 12, the Gideon Bible every night for a year because I was fascinated by it.
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: So I've always been a bit of a seeker.
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: I also, you know, i mean it is.
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: You know, i mean Christie and all those girls and Linda, all those girls I kind of grew up with, i was very, you know, i mean they're friends to this day And they actually all the girls from the freedom video.
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: They were so kind Because when I was launching Mr Field Good, i asked them it was the 30th anniversary of us doing this video And I sort of sheepish asked them if I could interview them to give us a bit of a launch.
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: And they all came back immediately and they owe me, can't move from Paris, and it was just amazing, you know.
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: So they really supported and rallied around me.
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: I think I just, you know, you know, we all have good days, we all have bad days, we all sometimes feel lost.
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: I think if you've got a healthy community around you, if you've got people that you trust, you've got people that you can rely on, if you've got people that you can sit with when you're sad and they don't, you know, push you to talk, they just hold a space for you, i think you're really, really blessed.
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: And for me, i've just always, i always.
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: You know it's another day of your life And I try and feel and see or feel the good of it.
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: You know, whatever happens And it's really testing at times, but you know you can ask what life's all about.
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: It's not meant to be easy breezy all the time.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: How would you know how strong you are unless you experience adversity?
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: and trauma is just part of the human experience And we all get it in some different package.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: Sometimes it's death, sometimes it's health, you know.
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: Sometimes it's a financial challenge, or it might be a blend of all of that, but either either way, the trauma is there to help heal you.
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: I always call it a set up in disguise, although it doesn't feel like it when you're going through it, because it's something.
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: It's there to draw something out of your human spirit, something out of your heart that you haven't yet sort of awakened.
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: So it's it's.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: It's.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: It's challenging, but each day can be a challenge, but with it there's.
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: There's always something beautiful if you, if you can focus that way.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: But that that takes skill and constant work in progress of you, as you said.
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: I think it does.
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: I think meditation I got into TM early on not early on, maybe 2009,.
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: I practiced for a couple of years And that really helped And it was beautiful because we've got three children, two boys and a daughter.
• 12:01
  Speaker 3: Who's the youngest?
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: And yeah, my boys, just naturally, and they were young.
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: Then they kind of started doing it with me, even though they hadn't been instructed officially.
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: We'd sit there, we meditate twice a day for 20 minutes And it was just really glorious.
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: It's just beautiful to have that kind of circle of men or young boys and me, my boys.
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: They practice that.
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: I think nature's really important and a great grounder.
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: So I'm a Yorkshire man, so you know, and we live in a beautiful area in the hills outside of Los Angeles, so we walk every day And for me, the last eight years you know I don't know if you saw the article I wrote have been hot yoga.
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: So I've been doing vicar and bicaram yoga for eight years now And I'm, you know, and it was only until sort of my hundred and something class that I actually had a breakthrough And I'm by no means a yogi or a dinosaur, you know, but but it was interesting how I was drawn back to it, even though I wasn't very good at it.
• 13:03
  Speaker 3: Something kept me going back And I think, i think we all need to have some kind of practice that just gives us a little bit of time every day to be with ourselves and to sit with ourselves.
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: And to, you know, I did something yesterday and it was just off the off the cuff, after I came out of a yoga class, i did a little Instagram post and and it's just about compassion, you know, and kindness.
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: For me, it is anyway compassion, kindness, self love, which, you know, for a Yorkshireman to admit to that is a bit airy fairy, but I think all of us need that, all of us need that time, and then we're better for a better service to our community and to our families.
• 13:42
  Speaker 3: So it's really a mental health is massively important.
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, i mean, it's a lot.
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: I've noticed I love your insight there.
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: I've noticed it's easier to be kinder than it is to be an asshole.
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's easier to be nice than it is to be horrible.
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: It's just a lot easier.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: And you know, we all find ourselves, you know, dancing between what I call being on and being off, and it's like if you're having an off day, you've got to find a way to get back to your center again.
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: And you know whether it's, in your case, doing Bikram yoga, and that anchoring of that habit is just so empowering.
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: I remember doing my first Bikram class back in 2004, going What is this?
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: And just realizing I did you do it?
• 14:28
  Speaker 3: Did you do it in America?
• 14:29
  Speaker 3: No, I did it.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: They came one in Parsons Green in London.
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, and just behind this actually was in the photo studio just round the back.
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, i've got so many memories of that studio, yeah, So it was just in there, literally just round the corner from that, And I was like, wow, this is very useful because I come here.
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: So I saw it when I came out of a shoot that I've been in there And I was like I'm going to go and tap that up because I've just been in Tokyo before and a friend from New York had said Hey, Bikram has just started up here.
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: You want to have a look at this.
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: And I said in London we may be a bit behind, but, lo and behold, something turned up And I remember at the end of my first Bikram or hot yoga session, I felt like I'd run a marathon because I don't want to stress like my whole insides were just imploding.
• 15:20
  Speaker 2: But there was a room of like this, like I felt like there was a freedom and there was this new sort of a valve opener going on inside of my body.
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, that anchoring experience that you've been talking about is quite powerful.
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: I wonder how hot it was, though, because I did a couple of hours in London a few years ago, and it was like a walking I'm not, you know, walking about our studio.
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: It's like a hundred and fourteen hundred and twenty degrees, 40% humidity.
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: I mean, it is hot, it's hot, it's hot And you, you know.
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: But the thing is, you know, i'll take a glass of water just to cool myself thinking about it.
• 15:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just, it's just.
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: You know the nice thing about it.
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: It's a bit like golf, really.
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: No one gives a toss what you look like.
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: It's not like at the gym, it does not.
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: Everyone's just struggling to survive.
• 16:09
  Speaker 3: I always find that if i'm, if i think it reflects what my mood is of the day, what i'm concerned with for the day, it's only when i let go of that and now i'm older, my eyesight is a little bit hazy without my glasses you can't wear glasses in there but i kind of like that second just about see the form.
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: I can't into detail and it's sort of.
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: If i'm in a place of Nutrality, if i let go of thoughts, if i just accept where i am, right here, right now, i've got, you know, i've got it's then i can suddenly do things that i've struggled.
• 16:42
  Speaker 3: You know, postures that i've struggled with for years.
• 16:45
  Speaker 3: You know, suddenly, as soon as i'm mind Lusness, when i'm not conscious of my concerns for the day, i'm just in the present.
• 16:54
  Speaker 3: You know, any goes in and out side, meditation goes in and out, but you don't be yourself about it.
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: As soon as you just let go of that, things happen if you allow it.
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: You know, if you allow that space, things happen.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: I learned i'm learning more and more about that, as i you know, as i guess i'm doing and really you know, accepting and allowing myself To go with that without overthinking i think the i spent some time in japan and i got led up a mountain one weekend and i met this shinto buddhist monk who gave me this beautiful plaque and he said this is especially for you.
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: I don't know this guy.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: My japanese mate didn't know this guy.
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: We just spent an hour surfing before and this guy goes this is a gift for you and you know exactly what it means And my friend Just he translated it for me because it was like the three kanji symbols and it said empty vessel, no mind.
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: And he goes.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: You understand what this means and i really did understand what that means, which is get out of your head, essentially, be an empty vessel.
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: Allow yourself to have a freedom in and space inside of your mind, whatever it takes, whether that's being present in golf or Being present in a sport, being present in hot yoga, bickering yoga or running, whatever it takes for you, or meditation, whatever it takes.
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: You get into this space where your mind is clear, even if it's just for a short spell.
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: Is is amazing for your health, your wellness and you're essentially your well roundedness as a human being, because you then start to do what i call is beyond.
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: You get to see more green lights in life.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah yeah, because otherwise you're just running around on a program.
• 18:45
  Speaker 3: It's the same old story, it's the same old, same old narrative, i think.
• 18:49
  Speaker 3: I think, yeah, you just got to.
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: You know it's.
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: It's my friend which role was talking about this yesterday.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: It also, you get, i get my most creative ideas after i've been in that space.
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah, i Have to keep going because i'm writing all the time every week now you know so, you know it's sometimes is deadlines, etc.
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: Etc.
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: And it's a lot of work, a lot of work.
• 19:12
  Speaker 3: So, yes, i love that that happened.
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: I love that that happened to you.
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: That guy pick your own, i think rich also said to me that it's the profits that walk amongst us, not not famous, not branded, not this, that there's just certain people out there which you know.
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: They just know what's going on, the taps in the kind.
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: You know, kindness is everything for me.
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: Absolutely man.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: i think that that is also another part of masculinity that i just wanted to sort of touch on here with you, like because You know, as a male, you want to provide, you want to be powerful, you want to stand in your power, but part of being powerful is being kind, you know, and i notice sometimes to hold your tongue back from saying something that could potentially hurt somebody, or even, you know, berating yourself and not having done something that you wish or you thought you should have done but you just didn't because for one reason or another.
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: You know we all find ourselves battling ourselves, that we think that we should be, that's all.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: we should have done something right, but you know, whether it's yoga or meditation or running or whatever it takes to get to that space, soon you get kindness.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: compassion is right there as well.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: yeah, and i love that story because i actually on your instagram post from not wrong, it was the one the car battery guy.
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: That's today.
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's today.
• 20:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that was just now.
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: That was just now.
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: That was amazing so just tell, just tell briefly, yeah no, two days ago i had a meeting in hollywood is.
• 20:51
  Speaker 3: You know it was important and You know i don't really.
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: I mean, i was in fashion or i'm in fashion for all these years, but i don't really give a thought about clothes.
• 20:59
  Speaker 3: I've just never been a thing for me.
• 21:00
  Speaker 3: You know i just get up, i want function and you know you want to clean, but i don't really.
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: I'm not a fashionista at all.
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: Anyway, i'd be.
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: I've been in new york last week for something and they give me some white jeans and i thought i'll wear these today.
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: And this is a bit not me, but i'm gonna try it.
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: And i was kind of having a bit of a giggle with it.
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: My wife gave me the nods, said, oh yeah, you look good.
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: I went to the.
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: I was on my way to this meeting and it was rush hour and I was driving down a big busy road here and I noticed this guy who stood by his car in the middle lane of six lanes on his foot and everyone's going by him.
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: And I'm slowly going by, looking at my jeans.
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: I'm thinking, oh, can I?
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: should I And I go by him and I just thought, no, i've got to help him.
• 21:45
  Speaker 3: You know it's.
• 21:45
  Speaker 3: You know if it was my daughter, my son, my friend, you know it's.
• 21:50
  Speaker 3: So I pulled around the parts in the 7-11 and I walked out and I said can I give you a shove?
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: You know, can I give you a push?
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: And his face, like it looked to me like I was an alien And he said that's.
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: He didn't say that's kind.
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: He said thank you so much.
• 22:01
  Speaker 3: You're the first person, the only person, who's stopped.
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: But I'm talking to my friend who'll be here in five minutes.
• 22:06
  Speaker 3: I said, okay, perfect, i left, i got in my car.
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: I was like well, that was good, you know, i haven't got oil all over me.
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: And I went to my about my business.
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: And then yesterday, Can I just stop you there?
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: You were willing to do it, regardless of the white jeans.
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: You know you were willing to put yourself through that.
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: That's beautiful, mate, although, you know, challenging it was still.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: It was the thought that counts, wasn't it.
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: I actually had slides on as well, so my grip on the road would have been really dodgy.
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: I would have probably taken them off and gone barefoot because it would have been too awkward enough, but anyway, well, you know anyway.
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: So I get back in my car And yesterday I'm in a car park doing a couple of business calls and I've got an old car which I love, an old Lexus, and the windows are down, the roof's open, my keys are out of the ignition And I go to start the car up and it won't start the batteries.
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: That I'm like, oh no.
• 22:56
  Speaker 3: So I think, shall I call AAA, which could be about an hour and a half, a couple of hours because it's rush hour again, or shall I wait for a kindly stranger and ask them if they could give me a jump?
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: And I'm sort of just sat there thinking about it And I'm okay with it.
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: You know, i'm okay with it.
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: I'm just like I'm not going to rush this, let's see what happens.
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: And I'm a bit curious.
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: This guy pulls in next to me and my hood's up, and then he pulls out again, he goes to another car parking space And I think, oh, he knows he doesn't want to have this conversation with me, you know, does he want to help me or not?
• 23:30
  Speaker 3: And anyway, he walks over.
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: I'm talking to my son And he says are you okay, can I help you?
• 23:37
  Speaker 3: And I said, of course that'd be lovely.
• 23:39
  Speaker 3: I've got a dead battery.
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: So he says I'll give you a jump.
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: So he walks back to his car And I think he's going to move his car back so we can have you know, we'll be close for a jump.
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: He comes back with this little sort of portable charger which I've never seen before We start talking.
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: He charges my car for a couple of minutes.
• 23:57
  Speaker 3: I start it, it starts up, i'm really grateful to him And then he takes the clamps off and my car dies Again.
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, okay, and I figure you know it's a hybrid car engine So it needs more battery power.
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: The guy just looks at me, said you know I need to get a new one, and he gives me this portable battery charger, which is quite fancy.
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: They are fancy.
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: They're quite pricey as well.
• 24:22
  Speaker 3: And I was just so, you know, i was just so grateful And it was so is one of those human moments which we can have every day.
• 24:31
  Speaker 3: I believe if we're, if we're, you know, in the right place, or even if we're not in the right place, but we're just aware of what's going on.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: If you open a door for somebody at Starbucks or whatever, if you say good morning, it's little things.
• 24:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because I think at the moment our world is in such a high, volatile, tight place in so many areas And I think it's just really vital that we kind of show a little kindness and compassion to strangers and to people.
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: So that was just a really funny boomer on Wang's story.
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: That and I had no, you know, when I stopped to help this guy, i hadn't.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: It was not because I wanted to be a good person, it's because he was in distress And I didn't expect something to come back.
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: But literally within 24 hours I'd been shown this kindness which I thought was lovely.
• 25:19
  Speaker 3: And then you know, and then I go home and I can tell my kids, you know, and it's just a perpetual playing it forward without being too earnest in an evangelical, it's just about being a decent human being.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: You know that paying it forward is really works And in a world where you know, as you were mentioning, that it's highly volatile and everybody feels that to a certain extent And a lot of red lining going on with how people feel emotionally And I think kindness and just slowing just slows all that intensity down, and trying to be a bit compassionate and look out for other people other than just yourself slows that down just a little bit, like the resistance.
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: What I mean by red lining, yeah, and I've noticed that in my own life.
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: It's sometimes difficult, but if you do it, it's just it's very liberating and you feel free again.
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: And that's when you tune back into what I call life's magic again.
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: you start to see these green lights and you just have that beautiful Boomerang story which you can share.
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: And these stories are the fabrics of what helps create more mental well being, more personal well being, even more family well being, because when you witness a kind of a person in a band act or someone is the recipient, even a witness will get to feel the same chemicals in their body as the recipient.
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's powerful.
• 26:45
  Speaker 3: No, i was just going to say, but we also always remember.
• 26:48
  Speaker 3: kindness is that people have shown us strangers or friends or family in our history.
• 26:53
  Speaker 3: They're the things I remember, you know, and someone was nice, when someone, someone understood or someone was just empathetic.
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: They're the things that are, so I mean, they really are this incredibly valuable to you as a human being as you grow older.
• 27:08
  Speaker 3: I can see a thousand of them right now.
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: you know, it's just little moments where someone was just connected to you and they cared about you in that moment And it's just you carry that and that influences the way you are as a human being with your community and with your family, and they're the standards to kind of aim for.
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: So, yeah, there's a lot to be said for it and i think it's, you know, i think, human beings ultimately a Community base and i think also i mean with mr feel good, it's the whole thing it's all about drawing people in, especially predominantly men.
• 27:39
  Speaker 3: But having these conversations, you know, i don't care what your social economic background is, your education, your which, who you choose to love, the color of your skin, i see is sort of all like being in the desert, in the mahogany desert, under a beautiful night sky, around a fire, and we, we talk to each other, we share and we laugh and we giggle and we, you know, it's just a beautiful thing to feel connected to another soul.
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: Tell us a little bit more what you're doing with mr feel good.
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: Mr feel good sounds like a really beautiful extension, maybe some of the values that you hold, and i know you're co created that with your partner, pete samson.
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, how was it?
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: how was it?
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: how was it born?
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: what was the genesis of it all?
• 28:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, i mean w w w dot mr feel good dot com.
• 28:30
  Speaker 3: Please subscribe, please.
• 28:31
  Speaker 3: Please come and have a look.
• 28:33
  Speaker 3: I know pete through his wife For ten years as an acquaintance.
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: Pete is twenty years in the game as a bona fide street journalists, right.
• 28:44
  Speaker 3: And i was working on this art show that i'd written, which i was about to pitch, when we went into lockdown and he called me up and said can i take you for lunch?
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: i said, should also?
• 28:53
  Speaker 3: i met him for lunch.
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: You know we previously we had dinner with each other, without families, etc.
• 28:59
  Speaker 3: But you know i don't think it's an airport, you know in the bar would be boozing and it be cigarettes and we'd be talking about football.
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: Is that kind of relationship?
• 29:09
  Speaker 3: And i sat opposite him and he come to a place in his life where you wanted to stop all this sort of stuff, is a new father of young kids, twins, and He wanted to.
• 29:20
  Speaker 3: You know he brought up the idea of this thing called mr feel good and it really was the Because i, i was sad opposite him and it was his honesty and his vulnerability and his courage that connected me to him in that moment and i thought i want to.
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: I want to develop this with him And take this out that this could be really useful.
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: And then we went into covid and so mr feel good was born out of this needs to.
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: I mean, i know a lot of people around the world, every level, every background, and i never, ever felt like it was the network thing.
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: All these relationships for me are authentic and they're real.
• 30:03
  Speaker 3: I really care about these people.
• 30:05
  Speaker 3: In the nineties, when we were here, allison and i everyone talks about networking.
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: It kind of churn my stomach so i felt it wasn't real.
• 30:12
  Speaker 3: But now, with mr feel good, it's a.
• 30:17
  Speaker 3: I reached out to my community.
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: I wanted to celebrate the positive.
• 30:20
  Speaker 3: I wanted to learn off you, off someone older, someone younger.
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: I wanted to have my mind expanded.
• 30:27
  Speaker 3: I wanted to Really focus on the positive and push back against the toxicity of the political divide which continues to this day, but also the pandemic and this collective experience We're all experience experiencing we were going through.
• 30:44
  Speaker 3: So it really is a sort of wellness magazine, predominantly for men, but that women are welcome and fifty five percent of our readers of women And we cover the full gamut of subjects.
• 30:57
  Speaker 3: From you know, i like to say it's like out of style, but also in a style.
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: So, looking at all the different modalities, it's not who, it's not like who is designed for bloats, who have maybe read a couple of self help books, but they know exactly what you know.
• 31:10
  Speaker 3: They don't finish it Because they know what the message is, but it's practical as well, practical information that might help you deal with certain aspects of your life you know that you're struggling with.
• 31:22
  Speaker 3: So it's just a really good conversation And you know i've been.
• 31:27
  Speaker 3: I speak to everybody, speak to professors of business, novelists, very famous people.
• 31:33
  Speaker 3: You know i'm really interested in the everyday man.
• 31:40
  Speaker 3: I mean, very quickly, i'm concerned about your time, james, but i was having a tough time for various reasons.
• 31:49
  Speaker 3: I went into my local old foods with my eldest son, cooper, and there's a guy there who is the security guard.
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: It was probably, you know, in his mid to late sixties, alberto, and he had you know, you look buff but really elegant but really amazing looking guy had a big old gun on his on his hip, which i wasn't keen on.
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: I remember walking in this one time.
• 32:11
  Speaker 3: I see him a couple of times.
• 32:13
  Speaker 3: I haven't spoken to him before.
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: I was having a bit of a tough time And he came over to me.
• 32:18
  Speaker 3: He must have sensed it.
• 32:19
  Speaker 3: And he said how are you?
• 32:21
  Speaker 3: and he was argentinian, right?
• 32:23
  Speaker 3: i said i'm having a bit of a tough time.
• 32:25
  Speaker 3: And he grabbed my hand and he shook my hand and he had one of those handshakes that would crush you, but it wasn't too intimate at you, it was just the way was from a different era.
• 32:34
  Speaker 3: And he said to me i said i know my son went to the other side of the whole food is like i don't know my dad's gonna start talking to strangers, because i do that quite often And he's very different from me is there is still a reserve and shy, bless him Is amazing.
• 32:49
  Speaker 3: And this guy what is that set me?
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: said life, life, the problems and challenges in life is that life is that the clouds come, the clouds go, but you must always remain the mountain.
• 33:03
  Speaker 3: And it was his generosity to a stranger that inspired me And I went home.
• 33:19
  Speaker 3: I wrote everything down, you know, as this is what happened.
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: I just wanted to preserve this moment.
• 33:25
  Speaker 3: And that became.
• 33:27
  Speaker 3: That was the start of Mr Feelgood.
• 33:30
  Speaker 3: And Alberto was also.
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: He didn't tell me he was in Argentina.
• 33:38
  Speaker 3: His father and his grandfather were both meat farmers, beef farmers.
• 33:42
  Speaker 3: They both died early, i think because they ate so much beef.
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: He'd come from to the States, from Argentina in the 60s and had been a vegan since the 60s And he's built like this.
• 33:53
  Speaker 3: He was the number one record holder of Barefoot Marathon, marathon 250 and more, and he was the kindest man.
• 34:02
  Speaker 3: So we launched really with a story about him as well, and then, unfortunately, he died about a year and a half ago.
• 34:08
  Speaker 3: It broke everyone's hearts.
• 34:10
  Speaker 3: He was a prophet who walked amongst us.
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: He was a kind man, he was just lovely And I printed when we did Mr Feelgood, i printed the art cloud because he didn't have, he wasn't on the internet or anything And that took it to him And he used to wear these cargo army pants or as a security guard.
• 34:26
  Speaker 3: He had about four of them rolled up so he could give to people this article about him, and so what I'm trying to say is that I meet everybody.
• 34:35
  Speaker 3: I've met a lot of people that we all know, but it's really important for me to celebrate those prophets that walk amongst us.
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: Alberto has left an energetic footprint on you And that is sort of imbued and hopefully painted within the stories and pages and inspirational people that you come across.
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: Mr Feelgood, and I think that his story lives on through you And stories are our legacy, and stories of kindness is essentially a wonderful legacy, because I always want to look back on my deathbed when it's time for me to go, however morbid that sounds.
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: I like to think how would I be remembered?
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: I always want to say he was a good egg, he was a kind man, and that's a very wholesome way.
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: I just wanted to say, john, it's been absolutely amazing talking to you.
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: Thanks for your generosity, thanks for sharing.
• 35:35
  Speaker 3: I feel like we're just getting started.
• 35:37
  Speaker 3: Thank you for asking me to be here.
• 35:39
  Speaker 3: I hope that it's a process of value to people.
• 35:42
  Speaker 3: Good luck with everything you do.
• 35:44
  Speaker 3: Please keep playing it forward.
• 35:45
  Speaker 3: Please keep raising the vibe.
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: Please keep leading with love, man.
• 35:50
  Speaker 3: I know it sounds tippy, but that's the only thing I know after 58 years.
• 35:53
  Speaker 3: next week on this planet, the only thing I'm sure about is it's all about love.
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to this episode And if you've enjoyed it in gotten value and inspiration, please consider leaving a review, because your reviews help push this algorithm up so we can continue to keep giving you better and better content.