Latest / Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design / 88 | Do Budgets Bore You? 3 Ways to Make Them FUN
Transcript
- 0:00Erin Gray: Do you avoid budgeting because it feels tedious, restrictive and possibly even triggering?
- 0:07Erin Gray: I want to let you know that you are not alone.
- 0:10Erin Gray: This is something that I have had to work through myself and clients also.
- 0:14Erin Gray: What if I told you that budgeting doesn't have to be this dull, almost soul-sucking task?
- 0:22Erin Gray: In today's episode, I'm going to share with you three creative ways to make budgeting actually fun, so that you can feel more excited, empowered and in control of your money without the stress.
- 0:36Erin Gray: So let's dive in.
- 0:37Erin Gray: Do you want to create a system to stop avoiding your money?
- 0:40Erin Gray: Maybe you're feeling guilt and shame when it comes to finances.
- 0:44Erin Gray: Welcome to your Money, your Rules.
- 0:47Erin Gray: I'm Erin, a former certified financial planner and CFO, and yet I used to avoid my money and had fear, no matter how much we had.
- 0:55Erin Gray: I can't wait to teach you how I overcame my money avoidance and started consistently managing my finances in a really simple way.
- 1:02Erin Gray: It's time to get comfortable with money.
- 1:04Erin Gray: Before we jump in to the three ways to making budgeting more fun, I want to offer that, if you're ready to transform your relationship with money beyond just budgeting, let's work together one-on-one.
- 1:18Erin Gray: We can create a money plan that actually works specifically for you and feels good for you, not forced, not what someone else says, not by minimizing your lattes, by honoring what feels good for you and your values.
- 1:35Erin Gray: You can head over to my website at generatealifeallivecom Click on the link work with me and then click on support and mentoring and you can schedule a call.
- 1:45Erin Gray: Okay, so let's talk about three ways to make budgeting more fun.
- 1:50Erin Gray: I think, first and foremost, we really have to start with reframing your mindset around budgeting.
- 1:56Erin Gray: For me, budgeting that word was so triggering I know that has been the case for some of my clients and women that I talk to.
- 2:04Erin Gray: It feels like a very restrictive activity.
- 2:12Erin Gray: And then you combine that with, like the Dave Ramsey's of the world, when they're telling you that you can't go out to eat or you can't have a latte or, you know, pay off debt first, which I don't necessarily agree with that and I'll explain a little bit here in a second but it feels very restrictive.
- 2:28Erin Gray: And why are we even going through life if everything we're doing feels like it's not fun and it feels like drudgery?
- 2:35Erin Gray: So I always start with reframing the word budgeting and maybe in the beginning, maybe you don't even say budget, maybe you just say I'm looking at where my money goes and flows.
- 2:44Erin Gray: I'm looking at where my money comes from and I'm looking at how it circulates.
- 2:48Erin Gray: Because if budgeting makes you just want to crawl in a ball, avoid it and bury your head in the sand, that that's not going to get you to budget more, right?
- 2:59Erin Gray: So think of it if you can get there.
- 3:04Erin Gray: Think of budgeting as more freedom versus restriction, right?
- 3:08Erin Gray: Most people associate budgeting with limit deprivation.
- 3:15Erin Gray: I think budgeting is so closely related to diets with the food right.
- 3:20Erin Gray: We restrict, restrict, restrict.
- 3:22Erin Gray: And then we're just so sick of restricting ourselves that we just like eat all of the chocolate, all of the cake, all of the donuts, all the things, because we've told ourselves we can't have it for so long.
- 3:31Erin Gray: And immediately when you tell yourself you can't have something, your mind it's called the RAS, reticular activating system your mind will focus on that.
- 3:42Erin Gray: Your subconscious doesn't hear don't, can't.
- 3:46Erin Gray: It only hears what you're saying, right?
- 3:48Erin Gray: So when you say can't have cookies, it hears have cookies.
- 3:54Erin Gray: When it hears stop overspending, it hears overspending.
- 4:00Erin Gray: So I think of a budget now as a tool that simply helps you direct your money towards what truly matters to you, what you value.
- 4:08Erin Gray: Right, and that might change over time.
- 4:11Erin Gray: I know for our family.
- 4:12Erin Gray: We have changed how we spend our money, how we circulate our money, because our values have changed and it's okay that maybe six months, a year ago, you were spending money on, let's just say, eating out a lot, but now maybe you have recognized this is what has been true for us.
- 4:30Erin Gray: We've recognized the value that we've received on eating out hasn't necessarily been the same as what it used to be, and so really redirecting those funds to where do we want to spend our money and what feels good in an alignment with our family and our values, versus we can't go do X, y, z.
- 4:50Erin Gray: So instead of saying I can't spend money on X, try saying I'm choosing to spend money on Y because that aligns with our family values.
- 5:03Erin Gray: That's what's important to us.
- 5:04Erin Gray: You know, travel has always been something that's important to us.
- 5:08Erin Gray: Eating really good food has always been really important to us.
- 5:11Erin Gray: So spending like we choose to spend our money on groceries and travel because that is an alignment with our family values.
- 5:21Erin Gray: I'm not really a big brand name clothing person Maybe you are, and that's okay, but my spending reflects how I actually what I value, and I think the first thing that we can always do is start with the awareness to like really just look at where are you spending your money and get some awareness around where it's actually going and is that in alignment with your values.
- 5:53Erin Gray: So if travel is important to you, budgeting or putting money towards those trips means that you're being intentional about setting aside money for them because that is important to you.
- 6:10Erin Gray: So I would suggest write down one financial goal that really excites you and use your budget to prioritize that, instead of using budgeting to be more restrictive and of a can't have energy and holding you back.
- 6:31Erin Gray: The second way that you could make budgeting more fun is I mean, I use a tool called Empower, which, ironically, isn't that so funny Cause I talk about empowering ourselves with money, but Empower is a budgeting tool that I use.
- 6:46Erin Gray: I really like it, I always go back to.
- 6:49Erin Gray: Is it simple?
- 6:49Erin Gray: Is it intuitive?
- 6:51Erin Gray: Can I link all of my accounts, which all of those answers are yes, so I'm able to bring in all of our investments and assets?
- 6:58Erin Gray: I will say we recently purchased some silver inside my husband's IRA and that account doesn't like when I search it in empower.
- 7:08Erin Gray: I can't just link it, but that I'm okay with it.
- 7:10Erin Gray: I could either suggest and ask them to add it, which I didn't really want to go through.
- 7:15Erin Gray: I just know that that amount of money is over there and so when I look at our total net worth, I just add that number to it.
- 7:23Erin Gray: But making it simple, it's you know, I'm able to create a budget, I'm able to pull in my transactions, I'm able to allocate them to the different areas.
- 7:33Erin Gray: Like it's super simple.
- 7:35Erin Gray: Everything's all in one place.
- 7:36Erin Gray: It's very easy to use and it's very intuitive.
- 7:40Erin Gray: Empower is the budget system, so if you don't want to use spreadsheets, you could look at, you know, using something like empower.
- 7:48Erin Gray: I used to use mint, but that got sold out, or so we changed over to empower.
- 7:53Erin Gray: Um, and make it fun, right, like I think so often we look at budgets as this boring thing, versus now this is, I'm doing our budget because I care about where my money goes and I want to grow my money or our money, and I like seeing where our money comes from and where it's going and think of it as that energetic component, versus like a checking the box.
- 8:23Erin Gray: So sit down with, you know, your favorite beverage, make it fun, Make it an enjoyable experience, and I know that maybe in the beginning it doesn't feel like that because you've had so many years of it being this.
- 8:42Erin Gray: What am I doing wrong?
- 8:44Erin Gray: Beating yourself up?
- 8:46Erin Gray: You know we we tend to look at money as such, this bad thing, boring thing, this necessary evil, and I really want you to start flipping the switch on that and thinking about how does money support me, how, how can I use budgeting to help me create the life that I want?
- 9:09Erin Gray: I think I've mentioned this on another episode.
- 9:11Erin Gray: I think we're so much like little kids right, like we want the sticker, and how often do we give ourselves the sticker or the pat on the back or the good job?
- 9:20Erin Gray: You know I don't think we do that a lot.
- 9:22Erin Gray: So celebrating, you know, every time you hit a goal right, every single month or every single week, like how often I suggest in the beginning, look at your money every week.
- 9:32Erin Gray: But every week, if you're on track, like how do you want to reward yourself?
- 9:36Erin Gray: And doing that Because you're building up those neural pathways of number one, sitting down with your money to when you hit your goal, you're you're associating some positive behavior and experience with it versus negative.
- 9:55Erin Gray: You know, a client of mine wasn't consistently sitting down and looking at her numbers and I suggested to her you know what do you like to do as a reward?
- 10:06Erin Gray: And she named a couple of things and I'm like why aren't you giving yourself that every time you sit down and you look at the books and you balance the accounts and you do that?
- 10:15Erin Gray: Why aren't you rewarding yourself, like I think so often we can just get in this habit of just going through the motions, versus I sat down when I said I was going to, I did X, y, z, what I said I was going to, and now I'm going to get to reward myself, play whatever it might be, that joy that I did what I said I would do.
- 10:33Erin Gray: Like what is the sticker for you?
- 10:35Erin Gray: What is the pat on the back for you?
- 10:37Erin Gray: And start doing that and making it more fun and engaging versus this drag that we feel like we have to do.
- 10:46Erin Gray: Right, so maybe it's going and sitting in a different place in your house.
- 10:50Erin Gray: Maybe it's bringing your favorite beverage I've talked about.
- 10:52Erin Gray: You know I sit down with my favorite tea and like being in the energy of, like someone who enjoys having money.
- 11:02Erin Gray: How do they interact with their money and sitting down and being that person?
- 11:07Erin Gray: When you look at your numbers.
- 11:09Erin Gray: I think so often we look at budgets as restriction or we look at it just as expenses right, the bills, the necessities, and that can feel draining versus looking at its budget as this whole holistic view.
- 11:22Erin Gray: Right, when I started to do that, that really changed.
- 11:25Erin Gray: So I would look at our investment accounts and it's like, oh well, look at how much that has increased.
- 11:30Erin Gray: And oh, we had some money in money market account and like, look at how much money we're making every single month there, like, where's that income coming from?
- 11:37Erin Gray: That?
- 11:38Erin Gray: I'm not even having to do anything and my money is making money.
- 11:42Erin Gray: So the law of focus you know what we focus on we get more of.
- 11:46Erin Gray: So if we're constantly thinking about how to cut corners or how to cut expenses and we're always just looking at our expenses, then we get more expenses versus looking at it as an entire whole of okay, where is my money already making money?
- 12:05Erin Gray: Where are the assets that I have?
- 12:07Erin Gray: What are my total assets?
- 12:10Erin Gray: Like, look at how fun that has been to watch it grow.
- 12:13Erin Gray: Versus every month.
- 12:15Erin Gray: All we're just looking at and focusing on is the amount of money that's going out.
- 12:18Erin Gray: Like, also, look at where are your, where is your money invested and how has that been performing Like that's fun to look at.
- 12:29Erin Gray: Where is your money invested and how has that been performing that's fun to look at.
- 12:32Erin Gray: And I always say having a fun money category.
- 12:35Erin Gray: I think this is really important because if we are always focused on where we're spending and it's just on, like those basic necessities, we're not giving ourselves a sticker.
- 12:47Erin Gray: So having a fun category, having a fun money category, allows you to spend guilt-free, right On things that bring you joy, that are just for yourself.
- 12:59Erin Gray: And I don't know about you, but as a mom, one of the things I've really had to work through is this money is for me, not my kid.
- 13:07Erin Gray: For me.
- 13:08Erin Gray: What do I want to do for myself?
- 13:10Erin Gray: That I'm not thinking about anybody else in my family, this is just specifically for me.
- 13:16Erin Gray: And I think it's so important to get in the habit of that because as you grow, as your money grows, you know the amount that you will be able to spend on yourself will get bigger, and I think it's really important to develop that habit of like taking care of yourself first, doing things and celebrating all of the work that you've done and allowing yourself to just have fun just because you have it.
- 13:40Erin Gray: A lot of my clients, including myself, you know, when they come to me, many of them feel like that they have to work hard for their money or they feel like myself.
- 13:43Erin Gray: You know, when they come to me, many of them feel like that they have to work hard for their money or they feel like that.
- 13:48Erin Gray: You know you have to earn it.
- 13:49Erin Gray: You know our parents taught, like you have to earn your money, which we do right Like we give value and then in exchange for the value, we receive money.
- 13:58Erin Gray: But the that earning of like you're just not allowed to just go have fun.
- 14:02Erin Gray: That has been a mindset shift that I've had to work for with myself and my clients.
- 14:07Erin Gray: So, really just having a fun money category, that's just for you and I I suggest having that for everyone in your family.
- 14:13Erin Gray: Like, even if it in the beginning, you know, 10, 15, 20 bucks a month, whatever, it is really just starting somewhere that you get to spend it on however you want to and that's like something you get to look forward to.
- 14:29Erin Gray: I think you know having some type of reward system and I think this is really important if you have a partner or spouse, because a lot of my clients in the beginning.
- 14:39Erin Gray: They aren't necessarily speaking to their spouse about their money personal finances on a consistent basis, necessarily speaking to their spouse about their money personal finances on a consistent basis.
- 14:48Erin Gray: So I think it's important to figure out, like, what is the?
- 14:54Erin Gray: What is the reward that we want to do for ourselves when we sit down and we look at our money on a consistent basis?
- 14:57Erin Gray: And it can be something as simple as going and getting a latte together and talking about your money, something that you're receiving because you're doing what you said you would do, because really, what you're building here is self-trust.
- 15:11Erin Gray: When you say you're going to sit down and you're going to look at your money or you're going to spend in accordance with your values, that's what you're doing.
- 15:19Erin Gray: And I think it's so important and I think it's something that we as adults get away from I don't know at what age 12, 14, that we stop rewarding ourselves.
- 15:29Erin Gray: Right, we think we have to do all of the things that aren't so fun first before we actually get to enjoy ourselves and have fun.
- 15:38Erin Gray: Switch on that and start thinking about how can I make budgeting fun, how can I make it be supportive to me and my family's lifestyle.
- 15:48Erin Gray: How can I reward myself for doing what I said I would do?
- 15:52Erin Gray: So the key takeaways, you know, to way to make budgeting more fun is, first and foremost, I think of if budgeting if even that word is triggering to you start to play with what is a word I want to use that sitting down with my money and being with my money, you know, looking at where my income and expenses go, just noticing how you're feeling in your body when you say budgeting.
- 16:17Erin Gray: So really reframing that mindset that budgeting is not a restrictive event or experience that you have to have.
- 16:28Erin Gray: It can be a source of freedom for you and your family, right?
- 16:34Erin Gray: It's empowering to know where does your money go.
- 16:37Erin Gray: It's empowering to know how much money you have.
- 16:40Erin Gray: It's empowering to know what is your net worth Like.
- 16:43Erin Gray: Those are important things.
- 16:44Erin Gray: I mean.
- 16:45Erin Gray: If you think about whatever number you want to have ultimately in a net worth or in your bank account or investments, whatever it might be, how does that woman think about her money?
- 16:55Erin Gray: Does she avoid it or does she care for it?
- 16:58Erin Gray: Does she nurture it?
- 16:59Erin Gray: Does she find value in knowing about the money?
- 17:03Erin Gray: Find value in knowing about the money.
- 17:04Erin Gray: The second takeaway is just making it playful, right, making it simple, making it fun, enjoyable and playful, and then incorporate some type of reward for yourself, like give yourself a sticker.
- 17:20Erin Gray: I remember one of my coaches she had.
- 17:20Erin Gray: It was considered a she called it an urge jar, which every time we felt like the urge to eat or overeat, I should say, then we put a little pebble in the jar, and so we got to see how we built up this jar of pebbles, because and it's literally like a sticker for us, and it's literally like a sticker for us, right?
- 17:48Erin Gray: So what is the?
- 17:48Erin Gray: What is the reward that you're going to give yourself?
- 17:49Erin Gray: Because you sit down with your money every week and making sure you spend that on something that you truly enjoy and you value.
- 17:58Erin Gray: And if you've been struggling with budgeting because it feels so boring and restrictive, I totally get you, but let's change that.
- 18:03Erin Gray: I help women like you build a money plan that actually feels good.
- 18:05Erin Gray: I totally get you, but let's change that.
- 18:05Erin Gray: I help women like you build a money plan that actually feels good, one that supports you, your goals, your family values and your happiness.
- 18:13Erin Gray: To schedule a call with me, you can head over to my website at generatealifewelllivedcom, click on the link, work with me and then support one-on-one mentoring and we can schedule a time that works well for you.
- 18:24Erin Gray: Okay, I'll see you in the next episode.
- 18:31Erin Gray: Did you learn something today?
- 18:32Erin Gray: Do you know another female entrepreneur who might be avoiding her money?
- 18:33Erin Gray: Will you send this episode over to her for me and, if you have it in you, please leave me a review for this podcast.
- 18:40Erin Gray: It helps the show grow and I love hearing from you.
- 18:43Erin Gray: See you next week.