Latest / FINE is a 4-Letter Word / 96. His Daughter Saved His Life with Chad Jackman

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96. His Daughter Saved His Life with Chad Jackman · FINE is a 4-Letter Word

0:03
Lori Saitz: Welcome to Fine is a 4-Letter Word, the podcast that empowers you to say fuck being fine. Tired of being stuck in a place where you say everything's fine when it's really not fine at all. You're not alone. I'm your host, Laurie Sites. I've been there too, and so have my guests. Here's a secret. All it takes is a conscious decision to change and then restructure beliefs so your actions take you in the right direction. That's where Fine is a 4-Letter Word comes in. Each week, you'll hear inspiring stories from people who have transformed their lives and businesses and practical tips and takeaways to move you from spinning in place to forward action so you can create a life of joy. Thanks for tuning in. Let's get started. Tighten your seat belts because we're about to dive into a story that's grittier than a sandpaper sandwich. My guest today is Chad Jackman, the unstoppable force behind Thrive Corps. He's in the business of Resilience, which he serves up with a side of mental toughness to entrepreneurs faster than a racecar on rocket fuel. Chad and I met a couple of years ago through a networking organization, and he actually contributed to the launch of this podcast. We've talked about having him on the show for a while, but he wasn't ready until now. After medical discharge from the Army, Chad struggled to rediscover his identity while telling himself everything was fine until he found himself staring down the barrel of a gun. In that moment, he chose life and painstakingly clawed his way back from the edge. Chad now helps others navigate their own personal and professional abysses. His Tool Street smart wisdom, pragmatic strategies and an enthusiasm more contagious than a toddler's laughter in a silent library.
2:08
For what it's worth, I give my guest bonus points for making their bio fun. You can hear Chad went all out with this, which is where some of these phrases are coming from. Don't be fooled by his life changing work, though Chad still knows how to enjoy himself when he's not. Turning hardships into triumphs, he can be found rapping his heart out, penning country ballads, riding his motorcycle, or having philosophical debates with his hiking boots amidst nature's grandeur. Hey, you know, you can go to Zen rabbit.com to get your copy of the Short Guide to Working Less and Living Better, Also known as the Five Easy Ways to Start Living a Sabbatical Life. You may also be interested in a brand new program called Staying Calm in Chaos. I'm super excited about this. It's ten short, easily digestible audio sessions that walk you through how to go from being an overwhelmed high achiever to a calm, grounded and centered person who has peace of mind no matter what. Comes with some awesome meditations and there's a bunch of other cool stuff to go with it. Check that out at Staying Calm in Chaos.com. Now buckle up, buttercup. It's time to get mentally tough. Discover your unbreakable spirit and thrive in the face of adversity. Hello and welcome to Fine is a 4-Letter Word. I know I say this every week like I'm so excited to have this guest, but truly, Chad Jackman, welcome to the show. We have known each other for a few years and he's finally agreed to come on the show.
3:53
Chad Jackman: Oh, yeah. I'm finally at the point where I can come on your show, I guess.
3:58
Lori Saitz: This man yeah, we talked about that before, but this is I know this is going to be so much fun. And because you're just a fun person and and not every part of your story, at least the parts that I know is fun. And that's part of the the the fun of the show is weaving into all of these different aspects. Right? So let's let's jump in and start with what were the beliefs and values that you were raised with that contributed to you becoming who you became as a young adult and beyond?
4:33
Chad Jackman: So grew up very religious, so I'm or Mormon, as more people are familiar with. Um, so you know grew up grew up with that and so but big family so I always had people around me um, and I just I've always had like in the disc assessment, I'm like a high I and then my next one down is a D And so I've always been just outgoing individual who just loves to have fun but other values. So fairly conservative growing up. Um.
5:07
Lori Saitz: Like what? What do you remember being taught about being a human.
5:12
Chad Jackman: About being human? Is this. Yeah, the golden rule, first and foremost. I do, yeah. Like, yeah. Do unto others as you want. Done to you. Um. And then you just know really big know your place. So. I got I got beat down quite a bit as a kid, you know, just. Just trying to live my life and find out later. I've got severe ADHD. But hey, that's that's a whole other story in itself. But looking back, that's, uh, you know, that's a lot of it. And then, you know, some, you know, other dark parts, you know, I was, I was molested as a kid, three years old by my babysitter down the street. So, uh, so, yeah, I've, I've got some demons with that dealing and whatnot, but. Well, good.
6:03
Lori Saitz: Three years old. Did you did you tell your parents? Like what? How did that come out? Or is that something that you repressed for years and then figured out?
6:12
Chad Jackman: So my parents knew. So because it was my sister as well. My sister's three years older than I am. So that's how they found out. And it was repressed. And like, you know, I was always sexually interested, I guess, from that point on, which got me in a lot of trouble as well. But but no, finally, like at 19 or 20 years old, like I was just having problems sleeping well, like problems sleeping any of these eyes. But they but my mom was like, well, hey, maybe it was because you were molested as a kid. And I was like, What? Okay, hold on. What's going on? And yeah, just right at that point it started all just come back to me and just was like, Wow, okay, well, that explains an awful lot in my childhood.
6:54
Lori Saitz: So did you get counseling right away or how did you manage that counseling?
7:01
Chad Jackman: What's this counseling you speak of? Oh, geez. No, I was. I was. I was fine. I was fine. Lori, I don't need counseling.
7:09
Lori Saitz: Yes, you were fine. I'll just go into the army and that will take care of me. Is that what you did? No.
7:15
Chad Jackman: This is actually after I joined the military. Yeah. So right out of college or right out of high school? I tried college twice and dropped out twice. And then I was like, Hey, let's go Army. So I was dating a girl and her mom was a recruiter, not a recruiter. She was a reserve administrator for reserve unit. And so yeah, went and was like, Hey, that'll be fun. And it was actually it was a great time. Served almost 21 years as 20 years, 11 months, 15 days to be exact. The only reason why I know that date.
7:46
Lori Saitz: Not that anybody was counting.
7:48
Chad Jackman: It's on. It's on my Dd214 discharge paperwork. So. Yeah, like, hey, so. But, uh. But yeah, geez, that's a whole other story in itself too. Geez, I'd still be in like, I was Reserves National Guard my whole career. Um, but there was blood clots. I got blood clots in both my legs coming back from a fire exercise in Romania and got back and, you know, my legs were swollen and yeah, if I would have thrown a clot, I'd have been dead, man. That's.
8:15
Lori Saitz: Yeah, well, that's really scary. Yes.
8:18
Chad Jackman: Yes, indeed. And. Yeah. So that's, that's, uh. That's at that point, they kick me out. Like I was medically retired, and I lost a huge part of my identity. Um, yeah, so I was. I was lost. And that actually led to, uh, to the incident 3 or 4 years ago of me sitting on the chair over here.
8:42
Lori Saitz: Before, before we get there, before we get there. Because I know what you're going to say. Uh, talk about. So you were in the army for how long? 20, 21.
8:52
Chad Jackman: Years.
8:54
Lori Saitz: 21 years. So that was a majority of your young adulthood. And did you? I mean, aside from your girlfriend's mom being part of it, like was like, how did you decide to do that? Like, college didn't work out for you, and was that part of your, like, background of serving? Yeah. Was it a way, like a way of giving service to your country? Like, obviously it was giving service to your country, but, I mean. Given your family background of being about service?
9:30
Chad Jackman: Yeah. Um, so was the first Army guy in my family. Both my grandpas were navy and then had a bonus Grandpa step Grandpa, who was a marine Corps guy, then my brother, my brother's navy as well. So I'm the oddball that didn't go navy. And but yeah, I've always had a sense of pride in country. I've always been a huge patriot. Um, you know, growing up, you know, it's like out in the backyards playing, playing army. So that's just what I did. But, you know, most people are most people are like, Hey, what do you want to be when you grow up? I was like, I've already been there, done that and retired, so because Yeah, well, because yeah, I started out as a surgical tech, a combat medic and then went Intel and then alerting it. Actually, I'm wearing a shirt right now. Yeah. So long range surveillance unit in the military. Uh, essentially you go into the enemy territory and set up a hide site and you watch a known point for a few days and then you sneak back out and, you know, report all the details and whatnot, you don't really find out about missions we do.
10:33
Lori Saitz: That's like the stuff in the movies.
10:36
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So you don't find out what we do or that we're even out unless it goes bad. That's when you hear about last units and and special forces units like in the, you know, the Marcus Luttrell story. Um, lone survivor. Uh, you know, that's if it goes bad, then you hear about it. If not, then, hey, we're doing a good job. But Right.
11:00
Lori Saitz: Right, right. Yeah. Yeah. So I completely understand what you're talking about when you say like once you got out, you lost your identity. Because when I had my first business, the, the baking company with the gratitude cookies. And once I decided to shut that down after 11 years, you're kind of like, that is who you are. You have become your business or your job. And then once you're not doing that anymore, you go through a lot of questioning. Well, who am I now and what value do I have now? So tell me a little bit more about that. Like you got out and then you had no like, well, obviously you had no plan because you weren't intending to get out.
11:41
Chad Jackman: Right. Well, so yeah, at the time, like so I was National Guard Reserves, like I said, the whole my whole career, a couple deployments here and there. But for the most part I was stateside. So I did have a civilian job. I was actually a surgical tech for 18 years. And then I actually went on and used my GI Bill. I got my MBA and my went in health care administration for a couple of years. This is all like towards the end. And so I had this whole other thing going. But this was a huge like you were saying, this was a huge, huge part of my life. So, so losing that was, it was big. Uh, so, you know, and that had a cascading event through a lot of things. So just, just trying to find myself again, just trying to find that whole, like, fill that vacuum. I just couldn't. And so anxiety, depression, an anger, all the things just kept kicking in. Um, so my official retirement date was for 20 of 20. Um, it was like, Yeah, but I know what you're doing. Retirement day. No, don't smoke. So no, I didn't. But for, for 20, I didn't always.
12:50
Lori Saitz: Think of that until you said it.
12:52
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So for 20 is definitely a fun day for me. It's my retirement date and not just a reefer holiday anymore, but. Yeah, but. Oh, shoot. I forgot what I was. But so.
13:05
Lori Saitz: But so did you. You had this. You retired, you had this. This. I don't say backup plan, but like, you had all this education and training to do something in the civilian world.
13:18
Chad Jackman: But. Yeah.
13:19
Lori Saitz: But you weren't excited about it?
13:21
Chad Jackman: No, no, I wasn't excited about much of anything. And so, yeah, it just started sinking deeper and deeper because, you know, like I was trying to fill this vacuum and just nothing would give me that camaraderie, I guess, in that spirit of war and like, just because, you know, like, you form these bonds with these these men and women that you serve with, right? So I was infantry and women weren't integrated at that point. So it was just a bunch of I said men. So but, you know, in the military, men and women. But so but you formed these bonds and. Uh, there's just something about literally relying and knowing that these people over here, like, have my back regardless. Uh, yeah. So, yeah, just having that type of bond with somebody is. Is is huge.
14:09
Lori Saitz: I can somewhat relate, but not as as deeply as I know those bonds are formed. Right. You know, having having friends, but that those bonds don't exist outside, like in the veteran community.
14:25
Chad Jackman: Yes and no. Like. I guess at that point, I just I didn't feel like I belonged because, like, so I never, like, I never had any, like, real major, like, combat experience, right? So I never went on a true combat deployment. Um, so like, all these guys, like post 9/11, like I was in for 21 years and like, yeah, I didn't have an actual like. You know, combat deployment under my belt. Like deployed. Sure. But not too, you know. Anyway, I've been shot at in Africa, whatnot, and it's been crazy. And, you know, Eu28 spy plane went down and, you know, went out and surveyed that and we're out or caught on security for it. And just the death and destruction that comes with that, which was just gnarly, by the way. It's nuts. Um. Yeah, but yeah, it's crazy, but it's. It's just being in that situation and just forging those bonds with these guys is just. It's huge. It's massive. Um.
15:28
Lori Saitz: But. So what happened? So. So you you're trying to deal with all of this and this this disconnection, which I think is a major issue, whether you're coming out of a out of the military or not in our society, so many people are so disconnected. But I think it's even more acute when you've been in a situation like what you're describing with. Comrades. Comrades, that makes it sound like Russians. So good.
15:58
Chad Jackman: Oh, no. Yes. Make you feel better. Like I'm still part of that. Yeah. So I'm part of the American Legion. And we say, comrade. And like, the the head leader dudes. Commandant. So, Comrade Commandant. So, yeah, you're fine. And yes, it's very Russian or German sounding, but so.
16:15
Lori Saitz: So you're.
16:16
Chad Jackman: ... doing some you're, yes.
16:18
Lori Saitz: You're missing this, these connections and. How did you manage that?
16:26
Chad Jackman: Not very well.
16:28
Lori Saitz: Like go into like tell because I know what's coming next. But share, share what happened with with my listeners of how you dealt with it didn't deal with it. You know what you went through in the next couple of years, right?
16:43
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So, you know, just, you know, tried to find somewhere where I belonged and just couldn't find anything like that and didn't feel like I, you know, belonged with the military community here. Like, so I live in Rockwall, Texas. It's one of the largest per capita like counties in Texas for for veterans. Like there's 6600 veterans or something in the county of Rockwall, it's a small county. But so per capita, it's it's one of the largest. So you'd think I would have like these, these, these bonds with these people, but I didn't. I felt like I was an outsider. Um, because I don't smoke, I don't drink, and I, you know, I don't cuss and, you know, so like, that's, that's all these things are, you know, like, hey, you know, American Legion Social here at the Cigar Club. Okay? So I get to go and stink like cigars and come back home. Great. Yeah, let's do that. That's. That sounds like fun. Well, hey, let's go drinking with a bunch of people and watch them get all drunk. And I'm just sitting here going, Oh, man, is this how it used to be? Because I was alcoholic back in the day? I've had a drink since oh three, But yeah, that's.
17:49
Lori Saitz: Congratulations.
17:50
Chad Jackman: Yeah, thanks. Um, but yeah, so just I just had no connection with anything. And so, like, with the PTSD and the background and, and, you know, this aggression and anxiety, depression, like, all the things like. Yeah, like the red card. Like was like, Hey, yeah, you're crazy. Like, yes, I am. Thanks for noticing. Um, did they wait?
18:14
Lori Saitz: They gave you a ton of medication, right?
18:17
Chad Jackman: Yeah, I'm on three, four medications.
18:21
Lori Saitz: No, I mean, back then. And they were like, You're crazy. Let's just medicate you.
18:25
Chad Jackman: Yeah. And I'm still on some like, I was on five at one time, um, just to come, come down and, um, and then I started going through like, cognitive behavioral therapy, CBT, um, then worked with a lady. Her name's Nicole Coyle. She's a, she's more of a homeopathic person. So I learned like hand mudras and breathing techniques and that those yeah, those were fantastic, by the way. Like, yeah, like, yeah. And I've got a couple meditations from Zen Rabbit, uh, because, you know, those are awesome. Yeah.
19:00
Which systemized.
19:01
Lori Saitz: Ones?
19:02
Chad Jackman: Yes, indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Yeah. And I've turned a lot of people on to them too, so hopefully you've gotten some.
19:07
Lori Saitz: Did you get into that stuff before or after the part that you haven't told us yet?
19:12
Chad Jackman: After? So ultimately. Uh, what, what was the question you always ask somebody like on this show is like, so when did I realize that Fine wasn't fine anymore? Like, was it fine?
19:26
Lori Saitz: Yeah. Yeah, right. Uh. I mean, you were going along, but. Wait, wait. Were you even telling people that things were fine, or were you actually telling them I'm not fine? I don't know how to fix how I am, but I'm not fine? Or were you saying, Yeah, everything's fine, even though it wasn't?
19:44
Chad Jackman: Yeah, total denial. Like my wife, you know, my wife was all. Yeah, she knows. She knew what was up. She didn't know how bad it was. My mom knew I was struggling, didn't know how bad it was. Um, and finally, just one night. You want me to just go for it? So one night? Yeah, Just sitting in a chair over here. Just contemplating life in general. Uh, you know, had a gun in my mouth and. Yeah, I was just praying. Hey, Hey. God, you know, So still believing. Huge believer was like, Hey, God, hey, just give me the strength. Let me just end this. Uh, you know, I don't know where I belong, at least at this point. You know, like, I still have my service group life insurance. So my, you know, I've been fired from, like, like nine jobs in three years at this point, and just. Yeah, like, just struggling. And so I'm like, at least I'm worth 400,000 if I die. So, you know, take care of my family, you know, they'll be all right. And, uh, yeah, it was. It was. It was real. Uh, then my daughter. Yeah. We share a wall, like, on my right here. Um, which would have been just messed up because she would have been the first one coming in. But she started singing to her dolls. I thought she was sleeping. Um, she's singing Goodnight, my Angel. And, uh, that was it. That was. That hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm like, what the heck am I doing? Like, I can't. I can't check out. I Yeah, there's.
21:12
Lori Saitz: Yeah, yeah. How old was she?
21:15
Chad Jackman: Oh, geez. So she's 11 now, so she was probably like seven. 6 or 7. Yeah.
21:22
Lori Saitz: Wow. And yeah, so I'm like getting teared up.
21:24
Chad Jackman: Yeah. I'm like, what am I? I'm doing like, can't I can't check out like, I've got my my daughter. I've got a little boy, I've got a wife and I've got a huge extended family. Like I come from a family of six kids. Right? So, you know, like my my parents have 26 grandchildren. Wow. And yeah, so, like, I'm like, what am I doing? And so that was my big wake up and smell the roses and just, you know, you're not okay. You're not fine because obviously I had a gun in my mouth. I'm not fine.
21:59
Lori Saitz: Yeah. Allow me a quick moment to thank you for tuning in to Fine is a 4-Letter Word. If you're enjoying the show, please take a second to hit the follow button so you don't miss an episode. And if you haven't already, I'd love it if you would leave me a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or Google Podcasts. Your feedback helps the show reach more listeners like you. Fine is a 4-Letter Word is available on all major podcasting platforms, so no matter where you listen, you can stay up to date with the latest episodes. Now let's get back into the conversation. Yeah, that's extreme. What was the first thing you did when you said to yourself, I can't do this and put it down? And then what?
22:56
Chad Jackman: Um, first thing. Yeah. I went in and I gave my daughter a big hug and said, Hey, you need to be sleeping. Why aren't you sleeping? I'm glad you're not sleeping, but. Yeah, yeah, let's. Let's get to bed. Okay. And then I went in and talked to my wife. I was like, Hey, I'm not okay. She's. She says, finally, finally. And she. I don't. Yeah, she. She didn't even find out about the gun in my mouth for a couple, 2 or 3 years. It was like probably the last year I think I posted about it or on social media and she was like, Wait, what? I was like. Oh, we can talk. About that. Oh, thought we did Talk about that. I'm sorry.
23:41
Lori Saitz: Guess you're going to talk about that now.
23:43
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So let's see. Let's talk about it. So, um, yeah, this is Yeah, huge. Huge turning point in my life, right? So and from that point, like, so Army's really big on positive psychology. So Martin Seligman is the founder of Positive Psychology. So they've run a big thing with the military. And so we have master resiliency trainers that actually go to a ten day course and get certified as a trainer. And then they come back to the units and then they teach and doing this like suicide rates, alcohol, alcoholism and whatever rates and whatnot have significantly dropped in the military, which is fantastic. So I started really getting into that and just, you know, really learning, uh, mental toughness and grit and how to be resilient and, and how to, how to bounce back because, you know, like I was, I was at a loss. I didn't know what the heck I was doing. So at that point, that's when I started reached out to the VA. I'm in their diamond mental health team down at the Dallas VA. Uh, fantastic people, fantastic providers there, even though there's a huge turnover rate. But hey, it's all good, you know, they don't get paid for nothing, but they're still there and still help us out. But uh, so yeah, that's where I was introduced to cognitive behavior therapy. And then I stumbled on to a Nicole Coyle, who's a part of another mastermind that I'm in at Apex Entourage. And she introduced me to to the hand mudras and, and breathing techniques. And that actually helps considerably more because, yeah, I was like you were saying, I was on like five different medications at the time. Now I'm not. I'm only on three. Hey, Yeah. And yeah.
25:35
Lori Saitz: No, it's progress. Don't, don't, don't discount. Yeah.
25:39
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So two or for. Yeah. Two for the anxiety, depression and then one trazadone to help me sleep at night. But I don't like the way it makes me feel, like hungover the next day and so I don't like to take it. But you know, judging from the bags under my eyes, I need to start taking it a little bit more so I can actually sleep because I only get like 4 to 6 hours of sleep at night. So I did start taking care of that because.
26:05
Lori Saitz: Because you can't sleep longer or because that's only the that's the amount of time you allow for yourself to be in bed asleep.
26:12
Chad Jackman: Um, because it takes me forever to fall asleep. And then a morning happens and hey, I'm a dad.
26:18
Lori Saitz: And you've Only slept that.
26:19
Chad Jackman: Two.
26:20
Lori Saitz: Okay.
26:20
Chad Jackman: Yeah, exactly.
26:21
Lori Saitz: Yeah, I gotcha.
26:22
Chad Jackman: Yeah.
26:23
Lori Saitz: Have you ever tried Breathwork?
26:26
Chad Jackman: Yeah, a little bit. So I do have some breathing techniques. And then you had that guest back in March. Um.
26:33
Lori Saitz: Leland Leland Holgate Senior. He was episode 85. And that's why I was asking. I just wanted to bring it up and see if you. Yeah, yeah.
26:41
Chad Jackman: Fantastic story. That that guy. Yeah. So, um, I was actually checking out his website last week or two weeks ago and yeah, like I need to purchase a couple of those programs that he's got. So, uh, just, yeah, just to have some breathwork going on because I could definitely use some, some core healing like that.
27:02
Lori Saitz: Yeah, well, I mentioned him because he is a veteran as well and he's worked with a lot of veterans who have been in the position that you were and, and maybe, you know, are now in terms of sleep and anxiety and all those things. So yeah. So I just want to. Bring that up because it was a great it was a great episode. But also the work he's doing is so important. So.
27:25
Chad Jackman: Indeed.
27:26
Lori Saitz: Now that you've you've gotten a bit of a handle on some of these issues, how are you feeling more integrated with a community?
27:39
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So yeah, I'm actually the adjutant for the American Legion post out here, so that's like the. The equivalence would be like a first sergeant, but so do a lot with the admin stuff. And so yeah, so I'm pretty involved with it. Haven't been in the last couple of months because I've been launching Thrive Core, but uh, but yeah, so I'm still a big part of a big part of the veteran community here. And yeah, it's, it's definitely a. It's nice to have a home, I guess, right?
28:12
Lori Saitz: I bet it is. I bet it.
28:14
Chad Jackman: Is. People that'll call you out and.
28:17
Lori Saitz: I call you out And celebrate wins? Both. Yeah.
28:25
Chad Jackman: Yeah. Both.
28:26
Lori Saitz: Great. I mean, that's so important. Whether you're in a veteran community or entrepreneur community or any any kind of community. Like, we all need people who will call you out and help you celebrate both because, yeah, that's so lacking, it seems like. And that's why we have so much disconnection and loneliness. And I mean, there's many reasons, but right part of it is not people haven't found where they feel like they belong.
28:58
Chad Jackman: Right? Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. And it's hard to find. Find a group that will even call you out anymore because, you know, like it seems like everybody's trying to be everybody's just trying to be that that person that gets along with everybody. But no, I need I need somebody that will call me out on my on my BS and like, get me back to my authentic me instead of me being a fake person that I'm trying to be because that's what got me in trouble in the first place is, hey, I'm fine, I'm good. Which, you know, obviously I wasn't fine, but I still said I was okay. And yeah, so it's, it's nice to have that community that will call your BS and, and get you, get you back on get back on the right path.
29:40
Lori Saitz: Yeah. It's been a long and winding road. I want to ask you about where you are now with Thrive Corps. But before I do that, I want to go back to you had mentioned so you don't drink, but you did. You were an alcoholic, which is not part of your religious background.
30:00
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So, yeah. So, um, you know, the Amish have a rumspringa. Yes. That they have that point in time where they escape from the religion or the community live like normal and then come back or stay. So I equate my time away from the church. Yeah. As my own personal rumspringa from the LDS religion. And so I, you know, I went out and, you know, lived an alternative lifestyle that I'm not proud of whatsoever. And I'm I'm, you know, I'd say I'm better having done that, you know, because now I know I'm just more secure in my values and my beliefs because I've lived that other life and I've I've seen the other me and like this me a whole lot better than the other me.
30:55
Lori Saitz: That's such a healthy way to look at it because so many people will look back at things they've done in the past and be ashamed and guilty, feel guilty for it. And yet it has. Regardless of what happened, it's developed you into the person you've become now. And if now is somebody that you're proud of and happy to be, and that's what contributed to it, there's no reason for the shame or guilt around it.
31:26
Chad Jackman: Right? And if you aren't happy with that or you aren't happy with the life you're leading, you know, it's time to get introspective and just figure out what's going on because obviously you're not fine. And before it spirals out and you have a gun in your mouth, you know, let's let's figure it out ahead of time. Yeah. Because, you know, it's a whole lot easier to figure out ahead of time then on on that night.
31:48
Lori Saitz: So yeah, and everybody has to start somewhere. So that's where your path started. What? So this makes a lot of sense of what you're doing now with Thrive Core. What is Because I'm not even really familiar. I mean, I know a little bit about what you you've been sending me some stuff, some material that you've been working on. So tell me a little bit about that and who you're working with.
32:16
Chad Jackman: All right. So thrive core. You haven't figured it out or you haven't heard about it much because, like, it's literally, like, just started. I finally got you.
32:25
Lori Saitz: Heard it here first. Ladies and gentlemen.
32:28
Chad Jackman: Yeah. Finally. Yeah. I finally got the courage to pull the trigger and say, Hey, let's do this thing. So I've been I've been working on this for a while. So Thrive Core is all about mental toughness and resilience and finding that power to not only just bounce back from a fall back, but thrive from it. You know, learn from those mistakes and, and learn where your shortcomings are and, and learn how to build off of it and become a better you. So that's that's the basis of thrive core.
33:02
Lori Saitz: How did you get to this point where I mean, it makes sense that this is what you're teaching because this is what you've been learning, right? How did you get to this point and decide now is the time to do this?
33:17
Chad Jackman: Um, it actually just fell in my lap. I was chatting with a buddy of mine and he was going through a lot of the same things I was going through and I just sat down and just started laying out a laying out everything that I've that I've gone through and, and yeah, just say, hey, so this is, this is what I've done. And so, hey, let's, let's get started. Let's, let's help you. And so just going through that with him, I, you know, was like, Yeah, hey, this is fun. This is awesome. I love this. This is something I'm really passionate about. And he actually told me he was like, Hey, yeah, you should you should teach people this because this is amazing. Uh, I was like, Oh, oh, okay. So I started just playing around with it about a year ago and, uh, and then, yeah, just lining everything up. And finally I started chatting with this other guy and joined his little coaching group, and it's called The Immortal Man. And, uh. Yeah, they were like, Hey, let's do this thing. And I was like, okay, let's go. Yeah, obviously, like, it's definitely something that people need. And, you know, instead of being, you know, taught by somebody who's. Not necessarily experienced it, but they're you know, they're book smart about it. Right. Let me teach you. And because I'm not only studying it explicitly, but I've lived through it. And so I know and I can speak to you. From real world experience, not just, Hey, this is what I read in a book, which is a lot of what I'm getting, like what I got at the VA. Like a lot of the stuff that they've had me do has been fantastic. But. You know, like the mudras and whatnot. Like they're not going to tell you that is going to prescribe you more medicine they're not going to get into.
35:13
Lori Saitz: Right.
35:14
Chad Jackman: Like all this other stuff like goal setting and and you know, you hand mudras breathwork meditation affirmations. Yeah. Like I've got 37 actually. I got 50 affirmations now that I recite every morning and night. Um, just, yeah, like, if, if it's not true yet, then reciting it in my head is going to make it true eventually. Uh, yeah. So that that's.
35:42
Lori Saitz: Are you looking, are you looking to work with other veterans exclusively or who's your who do you envision this program is best for?
35:54
Chad Jackman: So right now, small, small business owners and entrepreneurs, that's my big target. Also being from the health care industry. So health care industry and military, that's that's my background. Those are two high stress positions. And so I know people in both. Both would benefit greatly from it.
36:16
Lori Saitz: Mhm. The first first responder community.
36:20
Chad Jackman: Yeah. First responder. Like even hospital workers. Rn's, you know doctors. You know, just any anybody really who just needs to learn how to. Bounce back and how to like instead of wallow in sorrow and, you know, just get down in the dumps, take those as learning opportunities and learn how to thrive.
36:46
Lori Saitz: Yeah.
36:46
Chad Jackman: Instead of instead of, uh, you know, instead of having them stumbling blocks, take those blocks and, and build a ladder or a path up, up to success. Right. So.
36:57
Lori Saitz: Right.
36:57
Chad Jackman: Yeah.
36:59
Lori Saitz: All right. Come on, Chad. You know, we've been, you know, my marketing background. You've had some experience in marketing. You cannot say anyone who.
37:09
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So my, my, my big.
37:11
Lori Saitz: So I'm just giving you a hard time, right?
37:13
Chad Jackman: So my my big my big top three, uh, entrepreneurs, health care workers, veterans.
37:19
Lori Saitz: Gotcha.
37:20
Chad Jackman: Okay, So. But yeah. Yeah.
37:24
Lori Saitz: So it could be all three.
37:25
Chad Jackman: Three? Yeah.
37:26
Lori Saitz: Maybe you combine. It's all three. It's. It's entrepreneurs in the health care industry who are also veterans. There you go. There's your Niche.
37:35
Chad Jackman: Yeah, like me. Like. Like me. I was in the health care industry, and now I'm an entrepreneur and was a veteran. So like, yeah, I'm all three as well because. Because, yeah, like I was Blue Fox Growth Solutions. Yeah. That was, that was all about automation and marketing and sales. So yeah, that's.
37:51
Lori Saitz: That's typically what happens with entrepreneurs is that they best serve the people that they were a few years ago.
38:00
Chad Jackman: Right, Indeed. Because, because you can relate, you know it and you can talk the talk and walk the walk and you know because people. You know, so people, you know, buy from people they it's all about the chat. Holmes wrote a fantastic book.
38:15
Lori Saitz: Yeah, it's about yeah, it's all about trust.
38:19
Chad Jackman: Know, like and trust. But it's so true, though. Like, because if I didn't know you, like you and trust you, would I have reached out and said, Hey, Lori, I want you to make this personalized meditation for me that I can listen to every morning and know.
38:34
Lori Saitz: And I remember having a sales trainer who said that people did not actually need to like you. They just needed to know you and trust you. And I did not agree with that.
38:48
Chad Jackman: Right. Because they have to like you.
38:50
Lori Saitz: Like if I don't like you. Yeah.
38:52
Chad Jackman: If I don't like you. Why? Why am I going to spend time with you like I've.
38:56
Lori Saitz: How do you trust somebody you don't really like? Right?
39:00
Chad Jackman: So, you know, there. Might be those love. Those love hate relationships maybe. But yeah, I don't know. Don't get it. But so yeah, there's There's something about the. Know like and trust factor.
39:14
Lori Saitz: There is. There is. And then you have to believe that they have the knowledge to be able to provide what they're promising to provide. So I think there's an added.
39:25
Chad Jackman: Right. Well, there you go. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that comes with the trust factor. It's like I trust.
39:32
Lori Saitz: I guess you. Could stuff it under there. Yeah. Trust that you can deliver what you say you're going to. Cool. All right. We're going to put a link in the show notes to Thrive Core. And before we go, because you're you've been pretty chill on this whole conversation. But but I know that sometimes you need to get hyped up for certain situations.
40:01
Chad Jackman: Oh, always.
40:02
Lori Saitz: Always. All right. What's the song you listen to to do that?
40:07
Chad Jackman: Um, so actually was just jamming to it right before the show.
40:11
Lori Saitz: Oh, cool.
40:12
Chad Jackman: Yeah. So my. My biggest one. So there's. So music is my. Yeah, it's my jam. Like, I have such a varied, like, you know, I just wrote like or finished writing a couple country songs. I love rap. I love rock a little bit, but my hype song is not going to die from Skillet. And it's it's fantastic. Like the second verse is like, yeah it's it's. Where it really hits me real hard because it's it's all about. Like towards the end of it is like this is this is how it feels when you take your life back. This is how it feels when you finally fight back and see how does it go. When life pushes me harder, what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. And that's that's a huge part of the message that I'm that I'm trying to portray right now. And that's that I'm trying to live. And I, I fully believe it because, you know, like, you can't just sit there and take it. You got to push back. You got to fight for your life because nobody's going to if you don't care about you, nobody's going to, you know, like if you know, it's it's hard enough just to take care of yourself, right? So if you can't take care of yourself. Yeah.
41:28
Lori Saitz: Well, and I think actually, I think if you don't care about yourself, other people could care about you, but they can't help you if you're not willing to let them.
41:39
Chad Jackman: Exactly. Like the, you know, horse to water, you know, adage, right? You can't make them drink. You can leave them there. All the all you want. But, um, but until like me. Perfect example. Until I finally had that moment. Yeah. I wasn't ready. I'm like, you know, you could be like, Hey, you need help. No, don't. And that's just going to push me further away and alienate me more from whoever's trying to reach out and help me, because I wasn't ready for that. I you know, I was I was too busy, you know, wallowing in my my self-hatred and and. Yeah. And my my aggression and, you know, uh, yeah, everything. So depression and. Yeah So to be I was.
42:21
Lori Saitz: Going to wrap this up with that last question, but you just mentioned something that I have to ask about and then we'll wrap up. You just said. You said you wrote some country songs. Yeah. Have you published music?
42:36
Chad Jackman: No.
42:38
Lori Saitz: No,
42:39
Chad Jackman: Of course not.
42:40
Lori Saitz: The world is waiting for that.
42:42
Chad Jackman: I know. I'm working on it. So I'm. I'm really good at writing. So. Lyrics. Yeah. I could throw out lyrics all day long, but taking the lyrics and putting it to music, that's where I struggle. Like I've got my guitar back here, actually. Let's see.
42:59
Lori Saitz: It sounds like, Oh yeah, nice. It sounds like you need a partner, a music partner for writing the music. And I'm just putting it out there like because the people, you know, whoever's listening to this show, if you know somebody who, you know, maybe can't write lyrics, but. Wants to partner with someone who can. Chad Jackson hear is available.
43:23
Chad Jackman: Yeah. And you know, I do have a couple of people. So Nate Burnham is a musician. He's an up and comer in the country. Country western. We actually go to church together here in Rockwall. He tours the Northwest often. And so he's yeah, he's going to be helping me out and he's got some really fun songs. He's he's really talented, but his drummer is. His name's Andy. Andy Nelson. Fantastic. Just a he's, he's one of those people that are so musically talented. You just you hate him for it because, like, he during one concert, he plays the drums and then he gets up on the next song and he plays the fiddle, and then he goes to the piano and then he plays the guitar, and then he does this and this, and you're like, Dude, shut up.
44:14
Lori Saitz: Is there anything you don't do?
44:16
Chad Jackman: Exactly. So but, you know, just some people are stronger at, you know, some stuff than others. Right? But yeah, it still is like, you make me sick, dude. That's. That's just crazy. Um, but yeah, so he's. He's going to help me out. Like the stronger than Whiskey. That's the, that's the song from the Facebook post a couple or like last week.
44:35
Lori Saitz: Oh yeah that's. Right. I saw that on your face. Oh my gosh, That was so good. Yeah. Okay. I can't wait for you to publish something so I can listen and support and just say, Hey, I know that dude.
44:47
Chad Jackman: Right? And, you know, so and most likely it's going to be just a YouTube channel where I where I Just play.
44:54
Lori Saitz: Until someone. Important hears it and then it takes off.
44:58
Chad Jackman: Yeah, we'll see about that. I'm I'm 43 years old. I don't know about any tours, man.
45:03
Lori Saitz: We're just putting it out in the world. Who knows? You obviously. You were obviously saved from taking your own life for a purpose. We don't know exactly what that was yet, but it's it and it may. I'm sure it's more than one purpose. It's all coming together now.
45:22
Chad Jackman: Right? Yeah, We'll see how it goes.
45:27
Lori Saitz: Yeah. Thank you so much for joining me today on Fine is a 4-Letter Word.
45:32
Chad Jackman: I am super excited. I finally got on your show. I'm glad that I'm mentally and emotionally and spiritually all the things ready for for it. And I'm looking forward to seeing what life has has in store for me. Most definitely.
45:46
Lori Saitz: So am I.
45:51
Even though I've known Chad for a couple of years. There are parts to that story I've not heard before. Once again, I'm so grateful for my guest's willingness to be vulnerable and tell the hard parts of their stories. When you shine a light on the darkness, it can't hide or keep you victim anymore. Here are the key takeaways. Number one, often the last person to recognize you're not fine is you. It's important to have a community around you of friends, family, and supporters that are willing to tell you how it is and help you get back on track when you can't see the path forward. Number two, the Amish have a tradition called Rumspringa, a rite of passage where young members are allowed to experience the outside world before deciding if they want to commit to the Amish life. You can do this yourself in your own life to test out a different path. And one of two things will happen. You'll find that your current life isn't the only way to do things, or you'll feel more confident and secure in the path you've chosen. Number three No good comes from looking back on the things you've done in the past with shame. Those moments are necessary to develop you into the person you are today, someone you can be proud of.
47:12
Skip the guilt trip. Number four It's easy to wrap your identity in what you do. The problem is, when you stop doing that thing, that job, that role, that business, you can quickly lose sight of who you are. Instead, focus on deriving your identity from your core beliefs and values because those are less likely to change over time. And number five, it's been mentioned before, and it's worth saying again. There's no shame in asking for help. It's not a weakness. And if the person or technique doesn't work for you, keep asking. Keep looking for and trying different methods because eventually you are going to find what works for you and life will open up in a way you never knew could be so amazing. Thanks for listening to Fine is a 4-Letter Word. If you've enjoyed the show, please follow and share it with a friend. Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or your favorite platform to help others discover it too. You can find links to my socials on my website Zen rabbit.com. And before you go, take a moment to reflect on what you're grateful for today. Remember, you have the power to create a life you love, and I'm proud of you. Thanks for joining me. Take care.