Latest / Divas That Care Network / Power of YOU in a Relationship
Transcript
- 0:00SPEAKER_00: Hello, everybody.
- 0:03SPEAKER_00: This is for the Divas That Care Network, Dr.
- 0:06SPEAKER_00: Irina Kay, your primary relationship mentor.
- 0:09SPEAKER_00: Before I introduce you to our amazing guest today, Amanda Boklischuk, I would like to let you know to please stay to the end for a special announcement.
- 0:18SPEAKER_00: But now let's dive in.
- 0:20SPEAKER_00: I have with me an incredible woman, a woman who went through challenges that you wouldn't want to wish on your worst enemy.
- 0:29SPEAKER_00: She has traveled an incredible journey that has gifted her with invaluable internal growth.
- 0:35SPEAKER_00: Amanda was a widow at 23.
- 0:39SPEAKER_00: After remarrying, she was clinically diagnosed with MS, multiple sclerosis, and she had a negative reaction to the MS medication, which left her now coming back from not moving from the shoulders down.
- 0:53SPEAKER_00: I know her for a while now, and I know I told her This is absolutely incredible what she has achieved in these years because she has, with her husband, three beautiful children.
- 1:08SPEAKER_00: She does everything.
- 1:10SPEAKER_00: She does households.
- 1:11SPEAKER_00: She does taxi driving for the kids.
- 1:13SPEAKER_00: She is the nurse.
- 1:14SPEAKER_00: She is like a mom like everybody else.
- 1:17SPEAKER_00: She is rolling instead of rocking, she says, which is amazing.
- 1:20SPEAKER_00: Additionally, she runs her own business as a transformational speaker.
- 1:26SPEAKER_00: an empowerment life and business coach, and a network host on our divas.care network with her show Phoenix Butterfly Diva Style.
- 1:37SPEAKER_00: Amanda loves life and her vision is to assist as many people discovering their true internal strength, taking impossible and creating a world of I am possible.
- 1:50SPEAKER_00: That is so beautiful, Amanda.
- 1:53SPEAKER_00: I just, you know, I told you that you have my utmost admiration.
- 1:58SPEAKER_00: Always had.
- 2:00SPEAKER_00: And you always said, well, that's nothing special.
- 2:04SPEAKER_00: Everybody would be able to do that.
- 2:05SPEAKER_00: But this is just not so.
- 2:07SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much, Irina.
- 2:11SPEAKER_01: You
- 2:12SPEAKER_00: know, how is this possible for you to become what you are now, to claw back from this near-death experience?
- 2:22SPEAKER_00: and
- 2:23SPEAKER_01: oh my gosh it is totally a journey Irina um it is not something that happened overnight as much as I would want it to have um it took a lot of growing and internal strength and you know no matter what products I took what you know different things I took I tried natural I tried so many things and I tried the pharmaceutical, too, and that almost killed me, so I told them they could keep their medication.
- 2:56SPEAKER_01: But for me, it was when I started shifting my mindset, when I started believing in myself to know that I was worth healing, you know, after my first husband passed away of cancer when I was 23.
- 3:14SPEAKER_01: I went through a lot of different things for grieving.
- 3:17SPEAKER_01: I blamed myself even though I had moved on with life and I was enjoying my beautiful family.
- 3:23SPEAKER_01: It was just truly incredible and I was truly blessed.
- 3:29SPEAKER_01: I still internally, I don't even think that I thought about it anymore, but I truly blamed myself and thought that I was being punished because I couldn't cure MS or I couldn't help him get better.
- 3:43SPEAKER_01: I just wanted nothing more in the world at that time as to do that for him.
- 3:48SPEAKER_01: And so I think I really blamed myself.
- 3:50SPEAKER_01: And so it's taken a lot of forgiveness.
- 3:53SPEAKER_01: You know, that's another thing that really I've had to learn to do is forgive myself.
- 3:58SPEAKER_01: And I truly can tell you sitting in this wheelchair, I love myself more today than I ever did before embarking on any of this in my journey.
- 4:08SPEAKER_00: That's beautiful.
- 4:11SPEAKER_00: So what would you say that you're blaming yourself for not being able to save your first husband and also maybe for getting quote unquote MS?
- 4:24SPEAKER_00: How did that impact your relationship with your second husband, with your now husband and father of your children?
- 4:31SPEAKER_01: You know, I think it interfered in so many ways because I was so busy blaming myself that I was missing out on so much in the life that I had the opportunity to live with my kids.
- 4:56SPEAKER_01: This is the first thing I really had to understand is anything that we go through in our lives, whether it be in a relationship or a health or your disease or your job or anything in your outer world, all it is is, Irina, you know, I know you know this, the depths of your soul as we had the opportunity to grow together in that area, but everything starts from within you.
- 5:23SPEAKER_01: you know, if you're truly not happy with your life, you're truly not, you can't forgive yourself or, you know, things happen in your life, like situations, events that cause you to blame yourself again.
- 5:38SPEAKER_01: So when I was blaming myself, I was the victim, you know, and everything was happening to me.
- 5:47SPEAKER_01: I was, I just handled it and I was like, okay, I'll take it.
- 5:50SPEAKER_01: But at the root of all of it, why did it have to happen?
- 5:53SPEAKER_01: And so when I did that soul searching inside me to look inside myself and say, what is it inside me that's causing the outer reflection of my life to look as it does?
- 6:08SPEAKER_01: That was a super challenging, like very for you to go inside and be forgiving of yourself and first of all, and then go inside and say, what am I thinking and feeling to cause my outer reality to be this way?
- 6:24SPEAKER_01: And like I said, whether it be in a relationship or my health or anything else, so then because I blamed myself, knowing that, because I blamed myself for what happened to my first husband, I then created situations in even my current marriage that allowed me to get not to get, that's not the word I'm looking for, but to allow myself to feel guilty all the time and feel like it was always my fault.
- 6:55SPEAKER_01: Even when I was in the wheelchair, if I couldn't pick up, get everything cleaned up in one day or get the dishes done or those kinds of things, my husband would say something.
- 7:05SPEAKER_01: And then I just felt so guilty because I didn't feel that I was enough.
- 7:10SPEAKER_01: And when you don't feel you're enough, it hurts.
- 7:14SPEAKER_01: overflows into all areas of your life.
- 7:18SPEAKER_01: And so our marriage, I've been married for 14 years and through a lot of really dark moments, but communication has been huge to help us get through it.
- 7:33SPEAKER_01: And then to shift things, I had to start looking from within inside me.
- 7:38SPEAKER_01: I needed to forgive me.
- 7:40SPEAKER_01: I needed to know that I'm doing the best I can.
- 7:43SPEAKER_01: And there's some things we can control and there's some things that we can't.
- 7:48SPEAKER_01: The only thing we can control is ourselves.
- 7:53SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 7:54SPEAKER_01: And our journey.
- 7:55SPEAKER_01: And so when we try to feel like we can fix other people or heal other people or...
- 8:04SPEAKER_01: you know, fix our husbands or our spouses or significant others, because we want them to be something they're not, or we want them to be something we expect because of something we're projecting from inside us.
- 8:20SPEAKER_00: So would you say that it is always the case that let's say in a, in a marriage, the husband behaves in a way that the wife really doesn't approve of, that it comes from within?
- 8:32SPEAKER_00: Or can it sometimes be different, that really he is just not the way she thought he would be?
- 8:40SPEAKER_00: I mean, people grow and they may grow apart.
- 8:43SPEAKER_00: Is that a possibility as well?
- 8:45SPEAKER_00: And what would you tell people?
- 8:46SPEAKER_00: Oh,
- 8:46SPEAKER_01: completely.
- 8:47SPEAKER_01: Because, you know, when you first get together with somebody, you meet them where you're at at that moment and if one of the partners grows and develops and you know does a lot of personal growth on themselves and the other person just really doesn't want to or has no desire to you know eventually maybe you'll be at two different totally different places in life maybe that's not where you know you originally You originally attracted them where you were at at that moment, what you felt about yourself inside, what you reflected into the world.
- 9:28SPEAKER_01: And as that reflection changes, you know, Leo have two choices.
- 9:35SPEAKER_01: Either they grow and go with you or they choose not to, right?
- 9:42SPEAKER_01: And it's definitely not your decision, but please don't ever hold yourself back because you're worried about losing someone or you're worried about not being you cannot be the same person and have the life that you desire for the rest of your life you know like you know more you you know what i mean you become someone different when you really truly love kindly love and you know who you are so
- 10:15SPEAKER_00: what would someone do if they're in that situation they feel their truth is not to be with this other person, but they feel they don't have a choice, maybe for the children, maybe for financial reasons, or maybe because they face challenges like you do with a disability or something.
- 10:35SPEAKER_00: What can people do then?
- 10:40SPEAKER_01: Grow and go with inside you.
- 10:42SPEAKER_01: Your other reality will not reflect to you.
- 10:45SPEAKER_01: It will shift when you shift you.
- 10:48SPEAKER_00: I so agree.
- 10:49SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 10:51SPEAKER_01: Control you.
- 10:51SPEAKER_01: You start with yourself.
- 10:54SPEAKER_01: And you never know.
- 10:55SPEAKER_01: Miracles happen every day.
- 10:57SPEAKER_01: You never know.
- 10:59SPEAKER_01: So when you are where you are, go within and visualize the life that you desire.
- 11:06SPEAKER_01: And then see what the universe has to work for miracles for you.
- 11:11SPEAKER_01: Because it does.
- 11:12SPEAKER_00: It does.
- 11:13SPEAKER_00: It certainly does.
- 11:15SPEAKER_00: We have learned that with the law of attraction, haven't we?
- 11:18SPEAKER_00: Oh
- 11:18SPEAKER_01: my gosh.
- 11:19SPEAKER_00: Mundane little things like apples.
- 11:22SPEAKER_00: I told you the story.
- 11:25SPEAKER_00: Yes.
- 11:27SPEAKER_00: So would you agree when I'm saying a relationship is like an equation or, yes, actually an equation or a scale, like you say, if one side changes, the other one will just have to because that is an interrelation.
- 11:40SPEAKER_00: That's why it's called relationships.
- 11:42SPEAKER_00: And the only person that you can change is yourself.
- 11:48SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 11:48SPEAKER_01: And, you know, stand in your power.
- 11:50SPEAKER_01: And I giggle because, you know, when I first started doing a lot of personal growth and I started reading more books and really allowing what I was practicing to change, be part of my life.
- 12:05SPEAKER_01: My husband would say, you're talking a different language.
- 12:10SPEAKER_01: I don't understand.
- 12:12SPEAKER_01: And he's like, you're just growing away from me.
- 12:17SPEAKER_01: And so we went through those moments.
- 12:20SPEAKER_01: And at first I'd be like, oh man.
- 12:22SPEAKER_01: And I would back off my personal growth.
- 12:25SPEAKER_01: And then the chain effect of that was I felt so gross and just not standing in my truth.
- 12:32SPEAKER_01: And so I made a decision that regardless of whatever anyone else thought, I was going to do this for me because I felt better.
- 12:41SPEAKER_01: Things happened in my world that I couldn't even have pictured and put together if I wanted to.
- 12:49SPEAKER_01: And I started to feel better health-wise.
- 12:53SPEAKER_01: And so I decided that I wanted to keep going on this growth path progression, I guess.
- 13:02SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 13:03SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 13:31SPEAKER_01: And when I learned that that was not my job, my job was to grow me and lead by example, to stand in my truth and shine my light so everybody else could see it.
- 13:44SPEAKER_01: But to know that light, that truth belongs to me and nobody else.
- 13:49SPEAKER_01: And so when I just backed off him and I'm like, okay, I'm going to love him for who he chooses to be because that's what we all are at the end of the day is love.
- 13:59SPEAKER_01: And it was probably, I don't know, six months later after I had made that decision inside me.
- 14:05SPEAKER_01: And one day my husband and my daughter, or our daughter is sitting at the table having a conversation.
- 14:12SPEAKER_01: And I don't know, she was talking about school and how it was the girls were having a fight or someone said something or looked at someone wrong.
- 14:21SPEAKER_01: Anyway, and all he did is he said to her, he goes, Is that going to get you more of what you want?
- 14:31SPEAKER_01: Do you realize that what you think about, you know, you attract more of that into your life?
- 14:36SPEAKER_01: And my daughter looked at me and I looked at her and her jaw kind of dropped a little bit.
- 14:41SPEAKER_01: And she put her hand on his arm and says, Dad, I hate to tell you this, but you're really starting to talk like mom now.
- 14:51SPEAKER_00: Oh, very good.
- 14:53SPEAKER_00: And
- 14:55SPEAKER_01: he's not read a book, really.
- 14:57SPEAKER_01: And so when we grow, our influence changes others.
- 15:03SPEAKER_01: We don't have to say, I'm going to change you.
- 15:06SPEAKER_01: It's lead by example.
- 15:10SPEAKER_01: And all you can do is look after yourself first.
- 15:14SPEAKER_00: I love that.
- 15:15SPEAKER_00: And I love your metaphor about saying you're shining the light for others to see, you know, running after them.
- 15:21SPEAKER_00: You're not trying to chase them down and pull them in which ways that work for you, maybe not working for them.
- 15:28SPEAKER_00: Just show them how beautiful it can be when you make that inner pact with yourself.
- 15:34SPEAKER_00: When you make that agreement with yourself, which you said you make this decision with yourself to just stand in your truth.
- 15:42SPEAKER_00: and let the universe work out the kinks, I guess.
- 15:48SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 15:49SPEAKER_01: It's awesome.
- 15:50SPEAKER_01: It is.
- 15:50SPEAKER_01: It's truly just trusting, right?
- 15:56SPEAKER_01: And trusting in yourself to know that you are enough and that you're here for a purpose.
- 16:03SPEAKER_01: You know, I don't know what everyone that's listening beliefs are, whether you believe in God, goddess, the universe, spiritual, whatever that is for you.
- 16:12SPEAKER_01: None of them create junk.
- 16:17SPEAKER_01: And so you're magnificent and there is nobody like you.
- 16:19SPEAKER_01: And so for whoever is listening, really to know that When you know a little bit more about the universe and you know, my clients have come so far when they've connected within themselves, you know, they start and we're scared and we're not sure where to go.
- 16:37SPEAKER_01: And we don't understand why things just keep happening to us over and over again.
- 16:41SPEAKER_01: And that's why I love so much what I do being able to coach and, and not really, I don't even know if I call it coaching.
- 16:49SPEAKER_01: It's guiding.
- 16:50SPEAKER_01: It's guiding people to, their divine selves, to reignite that flame that resides in all of us, to really shine all of our lights so much brighter and make a huge impact in this world.
- 17:04SPEAKER_01: One at a time.
- 17:05SPEAKER_00: I couldn't agree more.
- 17:07SPEAKER_00: Even though we kind of feel sometimes helpless by what's always happening around us in a larger picture, like the wars or government, and everything else it's we have to do it one at a time starting with us and then it will create that ripple effect right so
- 17:31SPEAKER_01: very much
- 17:33SPEAKER_00: and then it's maybe your next spouse the children like you i just heard from you saying that your children very much live in that as well is that so
- 17:43SPEAKER_01: oh they do our kids are it's really funny we went to a women's show yesterday my daughter and i and And she's 13.
- 17:53SPEAKER_01: And it was really kind of funny because they just walk different.
- 17:58SPEAKER_01: They present themselves different.
- 18:01SPEAKER_01: And they get to impact people that they touch, right?
- 18:05SPEAKER_01: So that ripple's going further.
- 18:06SPEAKER_01: But they do.
- 18:08SPEAKER_01: They've applied it to school and their sports and everything.
- 18:12SPEAKER_01: it has served them very well.
- 18:14SPEAKER_01: And so when we were at this women conference yesterday, I had a speaker we were talking to who came up and was talking to us, and they thought that she was my friend.
- 18:25SPEAKER_01: So when they asked how she knew me, she goes, well, actually, I'm her daughter.
- 18:31SPEAKER_01: And they're like, no way.
- 18:34SPEAKER_01: You look like your sister, but she looks so much older because she just– it's what they carry with them, right?
- 18:42SPEAKER_01: It's that spirit, that confidence that they have with inside them that they're gonna make such a beautiful mark in this world.
- 18:52SPEAKER_00: Yes, I feel this emanating from you, just talking to you over a huge distance.
- 18:57SPEAKER_00: You're up in Canada, I'm in the New York area, but I just feel this, that if somebody is centered within themselves, they just are like so much more mature or older or, serene in a way right and i'm guessing if that is what you could give to your children it's just phenomenally beautiful
- 19:20SPEAKER_01: it is and it's something that i am so grateful through my family but then also my coaching i'm able to serve my clients and to really watch their them grow right and you know the healing some one of my clients lost her son and i can't even imagine going through that, but we worked through that, right?
- 19:41SPEAKER_01: And I'm not a counselor or anything.
- 19:44SPEAKER_01: We just looked, you know, I had the opportunity to provide her with tools and to help her get her life back on track, right?
- 19:56SPEAKER_01: To help her reconnect with that power with inside her that she felt so lost.
- 20:00SPEAKER_01: And so many other people, whether they go through separations or they are going through a tough time at their jobs, stuff keeps happening and they don't like it.
- 20:10SPEAKER_01: Or, you know, some of mine are building businesses, their network marketing, and they really want to take their business to the next level, but don't believe in themselves, even though they believe in the product and the company that they're serving.
- 20:24SPEAKER_01: To others, they don't believe enough in themselves to even tell anybody about it because they don't think they're good enough to share.
- 20:31SPEAKER_01: And you guys, everybody is.
- 20:34SPEAKER_01: Everybody is so powerful to create change and impact.
- 20:41SPEAKER_01: And all you have to do, like Irina, you just summed up, is work on you.
- 20:44SPEAKER_01: Start with you.
- 20:46SPEAKER_01: Pay attention to your thoughts.
- 20:50SPEAKER_01: And do the best you can to heal your past to move on.
- 20:54SPEAKER_01: And that's what coaches are so beautifully able to help with is that.
- 20:59SPEAKER_01: And so I'm super stoked.
- 21:04SPEAKER_01: Everybody can do this.
- 21:05SPEAKER_00: Everybody can do this.
- 21:07SPEAKER_00: Beautiful.
- 21:09SPEAKER_00: Like you got back to, you know, the, the power that is lying within us that people don't believe in themselves and think they're never enough.
- 21:19SPEAKER_00: And I think that, That is a big one, especially for us women, because that has, I mean, in my life as well, it was always that way.
- 21:28SPEAKER_00: Nothing was ever good enough.
- 21:30SPEAKER_00: It was always somebody else or somebody who did it better.
- 21:34SPEAKER_00: And many of us have grown up that way.
- 21:37SPEAKER_00: It's very tough to get out of this on our own, I think.
- 21:45SPEAKER_01: Oh, I would totally agree.
- 21:46SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
- 21:48SPEAKER_00: So you're thinking too that You know, if you have a mentor or you have a coach or somebody who has walked this path and come out the other end, that you could really help other people by showing them and guiding them as you call it.
- 22:07SPEAKER_01: Huge.
- 22:08SPEAKER_01: Huge, huge.
- 22:10SPEAKER_01: You know, it's challenging to walk in dark places by ourselves or to look in areas of ourselves that require the growth, but we have to go there by ourselves.
- 22:19SPEAKER_01: And so nice to...
- 22:21SPEAKER_01: I see it as, you know, coaching has an opportunity to shine a light in areas that people are too scared of going by themselves.
- 22:31SPEAKER_01: And this really allows them to confidently...
- 22:37SPEAKER_01: heal and take those next step in life that allow them to align to go towards to feel like they can step up to the challenge of stepping into that life they dream of to know that they are destined to do this but not sure what the next step is and feel almost stuck or frozen and do you believe
- 23:01SPEAKER_00: i'm sorry
- 23:02SPEAKER_01: Oh, you can just lovingly help guide in a compassionate, kind, safe environment, right?
- 23:09SPEAKER_00: Right.
- 23:10SPEAKER_00: I loved what you said, that coaches shine the light where other people are afraid to go because they're scared.
- 23:16SPEAKER_00: I think many of, well, not only us women, I think almost everybody in human life, and this is because we have a brain bias towards the negativity, is fear-driven coaches.
- 23:30SPEAKER_00: And sometimes, you know, they're just shying away from risks or doing change because of that.
- 23:36SPEAKER_00: So when I'm asking you, what is your secret to a healthy relationship or what tips do you have for others?
- 23:43SPEAKER_00: What comes to mind?
- 23:45SPEAKER_00: What should you do?
- 23:46SPEAKER_00: What should a woman do?
- 23:47SPEAKER_00: What should a husband do?
- 23:48SPEAKER_00: A couple do?
- 23:48SPEAKER_00: What should they do?
- 23:49SPEAKER_00: Start with you.
- 23:51SPEAKER_00: Start
- 23:54SPEAKER_01: with you.
- 23:55SPEAKER_00: Start with you.
- 23:57SPEAKER_01: You know, look inside you.
- 23:58SPEAKER_01: If you don't like what's going on in your life, the perception of what you're seeing, go within and ask yourself, why do I feel that I deserve this?
- 24:07SPEAKER_01: Or why do I feel that I need to experience this?
- 24:11SPEAKER_01: What am I going to learn from this that there's a lesson in it somewhere?
- 24:15SPEAKER_01: And how can I go and grow, right?
- 24:20SPEAKER_01: How can I go through life and go through the experiences to step into my future?
- 24:27SPEAKER_01: and heal from them so what is it inside me right what is it inside you that holds you back
- 24:36SPEAKER_00: do you feel that people are sometimes held back by their past experiences and what can they do to let go of them or not be ruled by them anymore.
- 24:49SPEAKER_01: This is where the coach in me is like, hello, I have a flashlight for you.
- 24:53SPEAKER_01: And sometimes we need a strobe light, right?
- 24:57SPEAKER_01: To go that far deeper, but really to shine a light on it and to go back and, you know, we like to as humans, I don't know, shove things down it's like oh I'll deal with it later or it doesn't really matter or it doesn't and we don't heal our past we just stick it down in a box inside of somewhere and hope that it's never going to come out but like a gremlin in a closet you know and if you put enough stuff in there just envision trying to cap a volcano right and eventually it explodes and maybe not even with anything that Or add anybody that's done anything to you.
- 25:41SPEAKER_01: But you can only pile so much stuff inside that then eventually it has to come out.
- 25:49SPEAKER_01: And whether it comes out in negative ways in your life, through different experiences, the emotions that you're going to feel in the end are going to get stronger and stronger.
- 25:59SPEAKER_01: And so heal it.
- 26:02SPEAKER_01: Let it go.
- 26:02SPEAKER_01: You don't need to walk around life with a backpack full of rocks.
- 26:07SPEAKER_01: holding your down and wasting your energy, you know, just let it go.
- 26:12SPEAKER_00: Let it go.
- 26:15SPEAKER_00: With help most of the time.
- 26:16SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 26:18SPEAKER_01: It's challenging.
- 26:19SPEAKER_01: Like I said, to try and do that digging and thinking without, You know, it's like, well, what questions?
- 26:24SPEAKER_01: Well, what is it that bugs me?
- 26:26SPEAKER_01: How long ago was it?
- 26:27SPEAKER_01: Why is this happening to me?
- 26:29SPEAKER_01: And sometimes it's really nice to have someone who is so trained with the questions with that is not judgmental in a safe, safe environment that you can feel confident in.
- 26:42SPEAKER_01: And that's why it's so awesome to have and take advantage of, you know, like a complimentary coaching session.
- 26:49SPEAKER_01: You can, some coaches offer them for nothing.
- 26:53SPEAKER_01: They're free.
- 26:55SPEAKER_01: And so you can, myself, for example, I offer a 30-minute complimentary coaching session Because I want to make sure.
- 27:05SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's awesome.
- 27:07SPEAKER_01: Because you just need to make sure that the relationship fits, right?
- 27:11SPEAKER_01: And you have that trust factor.
- 27:13SPEAKER_01: You are doing some very personal discoveries and make sure that you really have a coach that aligns with you, that you feel good about and is directed in the way that you hope to heal and go.
- 27:25SPEAKER_01: It's a huge relationship thing.
- 27:30SPEAKER_00: Very true.
- 27:32SPEAKER_00: Now, you were speaking of tools that you can give your clients when you're coaching them.
- 27:36SPEAKER_00: Is there something that you use yourself in your daily life or practice or something?
- 27:43SPEAKER_00: What is that that you're doing?
- 27:44SPEAKER_00: Oh,
- 27:44SPEAKER_01: my gosh.
- 27:46SPEAKER_01: I use as much of them as I can.
- 27:48SPEAKER_01: We all need them.
- 27:50SPEAKER_01: But now they just become habits, right?
- 27:53SPEAKER_01: First, you think of it as a tool and you have to consciously think about it, but eventually it becomes a habit.
- 27:59SPEAKER_01: And so...
- 28:01SPEAKER_01: You know, one of the things that I teach my clients is how to really pay attention to your thoughts.
- 28:08SPEAKER_01: And then when you're thinking a negative thought or something that you do not want more of, it's important to recognize why you had the thought and then to really think about, well, if this is what I don't want, what do I want?
- 28:23SPEAKER_01: And so just allowing yourself to pivot that thought in your head to create a a life and plant seeds for your future with what you want.
- 28:34SPEAKER_01: So I really use that pivoting a lot when something comes up into my life that I don't want.
- 28:39SPEAKER_01: I really allow myself to think about it and say, okay, well, if this is what I don't want, what do I want?
- 28:47SPEAKER_01: And that will serve you great.
- 28:50SPEAKER_00: Fantastic.
- 28:52SPEAKER_00: So what is next for you and how could people connect with you if they would like to take that offer of a complimentary session.
- 29:04SPEAKER_01: I would love to meet whoever would like to meet me.
- 29:07SPEAKER_01: That would be really fun.
- 29:08SPEAKER_01: And so what's next for me?
- 29:11SPEAKER_01: I'm in the process of launching my next course that's coming out.
- 29:17SPEAKER_01: And really, I want to teach people more of the fundamentals of the eight laws that I live my life by.
- 29:25SPEAKER_01: I do my best to live my life by.
- 29:29SPEAKER_01: And that's just changed my world and changes my world more and more every day.
- 29:32SPEAKER_01: And so I'm launching an eight-week course on learning more of the fundamentals of the laws of the universe that support us.
- 29:43SPEAKER_01: So that's coming out.
- 29:45SPEAKER_01: I've started couples coaching, which is really fun, by the way.
- 29:49SPEAKER_01: We're a business couple.
- 29:51SPEAKER_01: I've really, really enjoyed that.
- 29:56SPEAKER_01: And really just...
- 30:00SPEAKER_01: working on balancing being a mom and running my career.
- 30:05SPEAKER_00: Beautiful.
- 30:06SPEAKER_00: How could people reach you?
- 30:08SPEAKER_00: Is it through the Divas That Care Network or do you have a website or what should they?
- 30:12SPEAKER_01: You can find me on the Divas That Care website as well as I'm on Facebook.
- 30:20SPEAKER_01: So you can look me up, just Amanda Bucklishtak and you can
- 30:24SPEAKER_00: look me up.
- 30:25SPEAKER_00: Please spell that last name for everybody.
- 30:27SPEAKER_01: Come on, everybody.
- 30:29SPEAKER_01: Bucklechuk, so super easy.
- 30:32SPEAKER_01: Amanda, A-M-A-N-D-A, and then last name Bucklechuk, B-U-C-K, L-A-S-C-H-U-K.
- 30:45SPEAKER_01: See,
- 30:45SPEAKER_00: that's not so easy for everybody, right?
- 30:49SPEAKER_01: I'm joking.
- 30:50SPEAKER_01: Yes, it's great.
- 30:51SPEAKER_01: And also, it'll be on the interview when it says with Amanda Bucklechuk.
- 30:57SPEAKER_01: you can look it up on there as well.
- 30:59SPEAKER_00: Perfect.
- 31:01SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for being a guest today and for your insight and incredible wisdom that you can share.
- 31:09SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much.
- 31:12SPEAKER_01: And I'm so, I send so much love to all you divas and, you know, I'm so proud of you even for listening to this podcast or you're on there looking to grow and to become and step into that person you know you are.
- 31:26SPEAKER_01: We are all here to live out our lives of joy.
- 31:29SPEAKER_01: And congratulations for taking the next step in that.
- 31:34SPEAKER_01: I'm honored to have been here today.
- 31:36SPEAKER_01: So thank you so much, Irina.
- 31:38SPEAKER_01: You're beautiful.
- 31:39SPEAKER_00: Well, likewise.
- 31:41SPEAKER_00: Thank you, Amanda.
- 31:42SPEAKER_00: And I would like to get that special announcement that I promised you in the beginning.
- 31:48SPEAKER_00: The Divas That Care Network truly cares about all of you.
- 31:52SPEAKER_00: And I personally would like to get your stories heard.
- 31:57SPEAKER_00: Like, how do you cope with relationship issues and how you could inspire women or couples?
- 32:03SPEAKER_00: I want to hear your story.
- 32:06SPEAKER_00: Could you contribute to, for example, how to best deal with illness or being a caregiver for a partner or substance abuse, how that affects a relationship?
- 32:17SPEAKER_00: Please, if you'd like to be interviewed, can you send me an email at Irina at Divas.Care.com.
- 32:24SPEAKER_00: That is I-R-E-N-A at Divas.Care.com.
- 32:29SPEAKER_00: I would look so forward to connecting with you all.
- 32:32SPEAKER_00: So until next time, I'm Dr.
- 32:34SPEAKER_00: Irina Kay, your relationship mentor on the Divas.Care network.
- 32:38SPEAKER_00: Ciao.