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Mom-Mobiles and Sleepover Stories · Mom Wars

0:01
Speaker 1: From the front lines of The Mom Wars. Here's Bethany
0:04
Speaker 1: Mandel and Kara Kennedy.
0:08
Speaker 2: Hello, and welcome to another episode of your new favorite podcast.
0:12
Speaker 2: Although we're not so new at this point, I feel
0:14
Speaker 2: like we're over the hump. My name is Bethany Mandel
0:17
Speaker 2: and I'm a co host of The mom Wars. I
0:21
Speaker 2: am a mom of six, we homeschool, and I am
0:26
Speaker 2: a freelance writer. I frequently write for The Washington Examiner
0:31
Speaker 2: and The New York Post, among other places. And I
0:35
Speaker 2: am joined by my co host.
0:37
Speaker 3: Aura Kennedy, mom of one and currently pregnant. And you
0:42
Speaker 3: know what, in the last week two minutes, I feel
0:45
Speaker 3: pregnant for the first time. I'm like four and a
0:48
Speaker 3: half weeks pregnant. Some they're ridiculous, and now I feel
0:50
Speaker 3: pregnant for the first time. But it might be all
0:54
Speaker 3: of the food that I just rammed in my math
0:56
Speaker 3: before coming on, so we'll see.
0:58
Speaker 2: It might be. And we are by a guest. We
1:01
Speaker 2: don't do this frequently enough, and we are going to
1:04
Speaker 2: have lots more guests coming up and asking all of
1:07
Speaker 2: our friends to join us. But today we are joined
1:09
Speaker 2: by Danielle Taylor. She is a booking producer at Newsmax,
1:14
Speaker 2: and that's how I know her. And we were texting
1:17
Speaker 2: because I bailed on you two weeks ago and all
1:21
Speaker 2: good because and I talked about it on the podcast. Actually,
1:25
Speaker 2: the night before I bailed on you, I was like, oh,
1:27
Speaker 2: I think I might have to go get some ex
1:28
Speaker 2: raies and I did have to go get some X rays.
1:31
Speaker 2: In the end, I got lots of messages from people
1:34
Speaker 2: asking how she was, which was very sweet. She's fine,
1:38
Speaker 2: nothing was broken. She had either a very bad sprain
1:42
Speaker 2: or a torn meniscus, which is apparently not a big
1:45
Speaker 2: deal for a child. They were like, well, come back
1:48
Speaker 2: and you'll see. But she was like she was fine,
1:50
Speaker 2: like five days later. She said she was in pain
1:52
Speaker 2: for five days and then she came down that like
1:56
Speaker 2: fifth morning, and she's like, I feel better, great, really
2:00
Speaker 2: tired of you complaining and did not want to have
2:02
Speaker 2: to go to an MRI. So thank you very much.
2:05
Speaker 2: So I bailed on you, but you know, I.
2:08
Speaker 4: Told you, like similarly I told my daughter. We went
2:11
Speaker 4: ice skating at the time, I want to say she
2:13
Speaker 4: was about six, and she's like a strong little mama.
2:16
Speaker 4: And of course, like it was like three days home
2:19
Speaker 4: and she's like it still hurts. I'm like, just walk
2:21
Speaker 4: it off. It's gonna be fine. Like she broke her leg,
2:24
Speaker 4: like mom of the year over here, so you know
2:27
Speaker 4: it's better. Sorry.
2:29
Speaker 2: Yeah no. So I've done that not once, but twice
2:31
Speaker 2: with broken bones. The first was with that daughter. She
2:35
Speaker 2: did a backflip off the top, off the top bunk
2:39
Speaker 2: and it was the night before I gave birth, and
2:42
Speaker 2: I was like, super duper overdoe. I was ten days
2:46
Speaker 2: late and I.
2:46
Speaker 4: Was like, you're fine, go to sleep right.
2:50
Speaker 2: And then the next morning she woke up still crying
2:53
Speaker 2: and I had a home birth. So my midwife actually
2:57
Speaker 2: just like basically midwife to her and left me alone.
3:02
Speaker 4: You have the baby. I'm gonna take care of her
3:04
Speaker 4: real quick.
3:04
Speaker 2: Because the midwife is a nurse, and so she was
3:06
Speaker 2: like examining her and like you know, figuring out the
3:09
Speaker 2: dosage and they were just plowing her with tilan all
3:12
Speaker 2: and motrin. And at some point in the labor, I
3:15
Speaker 2: was like, what is going on? Why is my husband
3:18
Speaker 2: not here? Why is my midwife not here? So spress
3:21
Speaker 2: why is she crying? And everyone was like lear, Yeah,
3:26
Speaker 2: she broke her arm, and so I called the pediatrician
3:30
Speaker 2: an hour after I gave birth, and I was like,
3:32
Speaker 2: so I had a baby an hour ago, but that's
3:34
Speaker 2: not why I'm calling calling. And so we plowed her
3:39
Speaker 2: with thilan all motrin that night too, and so she
3:41
Speaker 2: had a broken arm, like actually to both bones in
3:45
Speaker 2: her forearm were broken, not just one, both arms were
3:47
Speaker 2: like so then no, so thank god. So we brought
3:52
Speaker 2: her the next morning to the pediatrician and they and
3:55
Speaker 2: the pediatrician sent us to Children's which is here in DC.
4:00
Speaker 2: And I was telling you on the podcast car that
4:02
Speaker 2: they are excellent because they have like everything in it's
4:05
Speaker 2: one stop shot for a broken bone. So they put
4:07
Speaker 2: her in a cast, and she was in a cast
4:09
Speaker 2: for I think like six seven weeks, which was really
4:13
Speaker 2: hard because that was like right when my sixth was born.
4:17
Speaker 2: So then I had like a one day old, a
4:19
Speaker 2: seventeen month old, and a child who was three and
4:23
Speaker 2: a half who could not use her dominant arm. And
4:27
Speaker 2: so that was the worst postpartum by far, so stressful.
4:30
Speaker 2: So that was broken bone number one. Broken bone number
4:33
Speaker 2: two was my third child. This was like a year
4:39
Speaker 2: and a half ago. He fell. He was like jumping
4:42
Speaker 2: a fence and he fell coming down the fence and
4:45
Speaker 2: landed on his wrist, and the second he came in
4:49
Speaker 2: crying because he's not a crier, I was like, oh
4:52
Speaker 2: you bad, is bad. Whatever you did is bad. And
4:55
Speaker 2: when he told me, I was like, yeah, you broke
4:57
Speaker 2: your wrist. But it was the Night of Russia Shana,
5:01
Speaker 2: Like Russia Shana was just starting. We were having lots
5:05
Speaker 2: of guests, so I was like, let's just like put
5:09
Speaker 2: some ice on it and we'll go tomorrow. If you're
5:13
Speaker 2: still in pain, I knew it was broken, right, so
5:16
Speaker 2: you know what.
5:17
Speaker 4: Like the only thing to say, like every time, like
5:19
Speaker 4: because I've even had kids with several like broken whatevers
5:23
Speaker 4: and like had to call like a plastic surgeon for
5:26
Speaker 4: you know who's face whatever. But it's like, our kids
5:30
Speaker 4: are outside and they're active, and a lot of kids aren't.
5:33
Speaker 4: So like as much as you're like, oh my god,
5:37
Speaker 4: these things are happening, but it's like thank God, right,
5:39
Speaker 4: like thank God that they're out and they're out and
5:41
Speaker 4: they're playing. They're like with each other and they're normal
5:44
Speaker 4: kids and they're not just like little catch potatoes.
5:48
Speaker 3: Wait, so you both have six kids.
5:50
Speaker 2: Yes, we didn't say that I wonder how.
5:53
Speaker 3: Many broken bones. It's the total between the birth.
5:57
Speaker 2: We've only had those two.
5:59
Speaker 4: Yeah, we've had two you also, Yeah, and then we've
6:02
Speaker 4: had stitches the twelve and bad. Yeah, not not terrible.
6:09
Speaker 2: We've never knocked on wood, We've never had stitches.
6:11
Speaker 4: How old is your How old is yours?
6:14
Speaker 2: My old car?
6:15
Speaker 3: How are my baby is nine months old? Just saying
6:20
Speaker 3: today that she's never fallen, So I'm not looking forward
6:23
Speaker 3: to that whole part of life. Well, you are sounds very.
6:28
Speaker 4: Stressful if it sure is and definite? How about you?
6:31
Speaker 2: So my oldest is eleven and a half. She'll be
6:34
Speaker 2: twelve in October. My youngest is two and a half.
6:37
Speaker 2: And I was actually on that on that thread, Danielle,
6:41
Speaker 2: I was reading a book that I I have my
6:44
Speaker 2: orthopedist on WhatsApp. We're friends because he's very nice. We
6:51
Speaker 2: got into like Jewish geography, and he was like, you know,
6:55
Speaker 2: I like if something happens like because he helped the kid
6:58
Speaker 2: with the wrist. Then that was like writers are it
7:00
Speaker 2: was starting. He said if this ever happens again, like
7:03
Speaker 2: this is my cell phone number? And I was like,
7:04
Speaker 2: do you know how many children?
7:05
Speaker 1: I have?
7:07
Speaker 4: But you're on speed die listened.
7:11
Speaker 2: I messaged him. I was just trying to find the message.
7:13
Speaker 2: But I was reading a book about the decline in
7:17
Speaker 2: and I don't remember the name of the book, but
7:19
Speaker 2: there has been a marketable like traceable decline in broken
7:24
Speaker 2: limbs of children, and it's not good. It's because kids
7:29
Speaker 2: are not outside, they're not playing, and it's you know, okay, great,
7:34
Speaker 2: it's great that kids aren't bringing their arms and their
7:35
Speaker 2: legs anymore, but like that's a normal part of childhood
7:38
Speaker 2: that kids are just not having anymore. Right, No, So
7:42
Speaker 2: he responded, He's like, well, thanks for your family keeping
7:46
Speaker 2: me in business.
7:46
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh yeah, absolutely, say no problem. I mean
7:50
Speaker 4: even even as far as like, Mommy, can I walk
7:52
Speaker 4: home from school today? You know, I'm like, okay, who
7:56
Speaker 4: are you coming with? You know, make sure you stop
7:58
Speaker 4: and make sure you're going way where there's crossing guards.
8:01
Speaker 4: Because I feel like when I was growing up, it
8:03
Speaker 4: was like, yeah, well, like you have to walk home
8:06
Speaker 4: from school. Now it's like you can get arrested. Like
8:08
Speaker 4: I saw a ten year old like on the news
8:11
Speaker 4: somewhere that they arrested the mom because did you see that?
8:16
Speaker 2: So I did not, But today on my So I
8:20
Speaker 2: have a ridiculous we have a ridiculous a list serve.
8:24
Speaker 2: In my Jewish community where I live, it's very tight knit,
8:27
Speaker 2: but you like low key learn to how to hate
8:30
Speaker 2: like almost everyone you know, but then you have to
8:32
Speaker 2: deal with them all the time, and so you're like, oh,
8:36
Speaker 2: you're really obnoxious, but you can't.
8:38
Speaker 4: You mean, like like it's almost like a mom group
8:40
Speaker 4: and you guys all talk and they ask questions to
8:42
Speaker 4: one another.
8:43
Speaker 2: So there's there's so many WhatsApp groups. Okay, this is
8:47
Speaker 2: like an email list serve that only the boomers use. Okay,
8:50
Speaker 2: So like the WhatsApp groups are for the people my age,
8:53
Speaker 2: and then there's like an email list serve that's for
8:55
Speaker 2: the boomers yead and so a boomer emailed yesterday the
9:00
Speaker 2: following email. On Tuesday morning, between eleven and eleven thirty am,
9:04
Speaker 2: I was in a car when the walk sign went on.
9:08
Speaker 2: Three tiny children went across without any adult or even
9:12
Speaker 2: a teenager in sight anywhere. And then this part I
9:15
Speaker 2: didn't like. I could tell they were members of the
9:17
Speaker 2: Orthodox community because of the little girls wearing long dresses,
9:21
Speaker 2: et cetera. They were not holding hands. The oldest may
9:25
Speaker 2: have been eight, the youngest maybe three. You cannot let
9:29
Speaker 2: your children out themselves without an adult and really expect
9:33
Speaker 2: them to arrive home safely. They are too short for
9:36
Speaker 2: these drivers in large SUVs to even see. There are
9:39
Speaker 2: crazy people out there who could have snatched them. Also,
9:44
Speaker 2: do you know the self control it took for me
9:46
Speaker 2: not to buy?
9:47
Speaker 3: All on the entire was the person who sent that
9:50
Speaker 3: to ish.
9:52
Speaker 2: So it's only Jews on this list serve. But this
9:55
Speaker 2: person obviously has some animosity towards like or not people
9:59
Speaker 2: like the most anti Semitic people are usually actually Jewish,
10:03
Speaker 2: like me. For example, I am anti Semitic things that
10:07
Speaker 2: Jews do. But that really really bothered me, and I
10:11
Speaker 2: emailed it to myself because I want to write a
10:13
Speaker 2: post about it for our sub stack instead of replying
10:16
Speaker 2: all to the entire community to maybe I'll do both.
10:22
Speaker 2: But it really bothered me because nothing happened. These children
10:26
Speaker 2: waited for the walk sign. Okay, they weren't holding hands,
10:28
Speaker 2: but like that doesn't equal safety, Like you can just walk.
10:34
Speaker 2: They arrived at their destination fine, they seem to know
10:38
Speaker 2: what they're doing, and for this they were shamed for
10:41
Speaker 2: the entire community, and I kind of want to reply
10:45
Speaker 2: all just to defend that mother, because one of the
10:49
Speaker 2: things I love about where I live is that that
10:51
Speaker 2: is normal in Bergen County too. Where you live there's
10:55
Speaker 2: a ton of Jews, and it's super normal to just
10:58
Speaker 2: let people.
11:01
Speaker 4: Go, like the kids come walk like, I mean, they're
11:03
Speaker 4: safe in their neighborhoods. They know where they're going. Call
11:06
Speaker 4: me when you get to where you're supposed to be.
11:08
Speaker 4: You're with your older sisters, you know, like you're in
11:11
Speaker 4: a group. It's not like you're by yourself, like like
11:13
Speaker 4: a three year old, you know, even though my three
11:16
Speaker 4: year old escapes out of the back door in the
11:20
Speaker 4: nude very often and my neighbors are always like, hey,
11:24
Speaker 4: you know, or so and so it takes a scooter
11:26
Speaker 4: and ends up in someone's backyard, but you know, it's
11:30
Speaker 4: it's part of like feeling safe in your environment, right, Like,
11:35
Speaker 4: And to have somebody like that to shame children on
11:39
Speaker 4: like what they're wearing, they must be this, Like who cares?
11:43
Speaker 4: Like just make sure that they're safe, Like you could
11:46
Speaker 4: be a part of the community too, Just be like, oh,
11:49
Speaker 4: by the way.
11:49
Speaker 2: They were safe, Like I.
11:50
Speaker 4: Made sure that they walked across in front of my car.
11:54
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, no, it really bothered me because this like
11:58
Speaker 2: idea that someone could have snaps them is so divorced
12:02
Speaker 2: from reality. If you want to actually be super duper
12:06
Speaker 2: duper safe, the safest thing you can do is not
12:09
Speaker 2: let your children sleep over at their cousin's house. Like
12:12
Speaker 2: that's actually very dangerous. My daughters to sleepover right now,
12:16
Speaker 2: that set like that is more dangerous than my eight,
12:20
Speaker 2: five and three year old walking across the street. What
12:24
Speaker 2: I'm doing right now with my eleven year old at
12:25
Speaker 2: a sleepover. Who's she sleeping over by a friend? I
12:29
Speaker 2: know the I know the family pretty well, and I've had.
12:34
Speaker 4: Like a birthday party or just like yeah, yeah, that's nice.
12:38
Speaker 2: So I had no sleepover policy for a really long
12:41
Speaker 2: time because I had like kind of a scary moment
12:45
Speaker 2: with one of my kids, well actually all of my
12:47
Speaker 2: kids out of sleepover where the person who the person's
12:52
Speaker 2: whose house it was, made some decisions that I think
12:56
Speaker 2: were deeply unsafe, and I found out about it like
12:59
Speaker 2: months later.
13:00
Speaker 3: Well decisions, well decisions.
13:01
Speaker 2: I don't want to say because I don't want to.
13:04
Speaker 2: I don't this a podcast. I'll tell you after. But
13:10
Speaker 2: I instituted a no sleepover policy as a result, and
13:15
Speaker 2: now now the policy is like if there's an older
13:21
Speaker 2: brother or like a post pube breast pubescent brother in
13:27
Speaker 2: the house, it's a no. Or if the father gives
13:30
Speaker 2: me the ick.
13:32
Speaker 3: That that's a fair enough rule.
13:35
Speaker 2: Yeah. So it's awkward though, because sometimes I say yes
13:39
Speaker 2: and sometimes I say no.
13:41
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then it confuses kids for sure. But it's
13:44
Speaker 4: like you have to kind of take your gut on it,
13:46
Speaker 4: and as long as you're album with your kids, like
13:48
Speaker 4: I'm sure you are as I am with mine, Like
13:51
Speaker 4: every decision we make is to keep you safe, right right, right, So,
13:55
Speaker 4: I mean I had an experience that it had nothing
13:57
Speaker 4: to do with sleepover. But my oldest who is he
14:00
Speaker 4: plays hockey. He plays like travel hockey. So he got
14:04
Speaker 4: in a car with a dad who like kinda sometimes
14:06
Speaker 4: gives me the egg like like he's he's so nice,
14:10
Speaker 4: but at the same time he's always like, oh, Danielle,
14:13
Speaker 4: you're popping out another one. Oh you and John it's like, bro,
14:16
Speaker 4: like leave me alone, Like it's my family, you know
14:18
Speaker 4: what I mean, it's not right how to explain it,
14:21
Speaker 4: you know? Anyway, long and especially like in front of
14:23
Speaker 4: my kids, Like I'm really not trying to talk about
14:27
Speaker 4: that in front of my kids, so whatever. But anyway,
14:29
Speaker 4: he goes in the car with him and he's going
14:31
Speaker 4: down to Philly. So we're in Jersey to Philly. It
14:33
Speaker 4: was like three hour drive. Of course, like the dad
14:36
Speaker 4: gets into a total like wreck with my son in
14:40
Speaker 4: the car and he doesn't have a phone because he
14:42
Speaker 4: was nine at the time, like turning ten. He still
14:44
Speaker 4: doesn't have a phone. He has like a watch that
14:46
Speaker 4: like I can talk to him now, by the way,
14:50
Speaker 4: a gizmo.
14:51
Speaker 2: I think I want to get that, Okay.
14:53
Speaker 4: By Horizon. It's two dollars a month. It's like super cheap,
14:57
Speaker 4: but it's it's so good because my kids will be like, oh,
15:00
Speaker 4: after school, can I walk to the library? Yeah, do
15:02
Speaker 4: you have your watch on? Yeah? Okay, no problem. Everyone
15:04
Speaker 4: meet you know together, and then call me when you
15:06
Speaker 4: want me to pick you up. My boys play you know,
15:08
Speaker 4: football outside. The girls go inside and like do their homework.
15:11
Speaker 4: But it's nice to be able to like be like, hey,
15:14
Speaker 4: you know, where are you and I can actually track them,
15:16
Speaker 4: which is super nice, so I know if they are
15:19
Speaker 4: walking home, like, oh, they've made it here. Wherever. You know,
15:22
Speaker 4: I'm like, hey, that.
15:25
Speaker 2: So I've I in the beginning of me letting my
15:28
Speaker 2: kids walk around the neighborhood even on Shabbat. So on Shabat,
15:30
Speaker 2: we don't use our phones, right, Yeah, but like in
15:34
Speaker 2: the beginning, I'm not. I won't lie. Like I air
15:37
Speaker 2: tagged my kids and I did check it a few
15:40
Speaker 2: times on Shabbat because I was like, I'm going to
15:44
Speaker 2: have an anxiety attack. I just need to check the.
15:45
Speaker 4: Air tag right, just see where they are.
15:47
Speaker 2: That's actually really helpful.
15:49
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, it's it's super helpful, and I like it.
15:52
Speaker 4: So anyway, total rep Yeah, in a wreck and like,
15:58
Speaker 4: you know, I call the dad and the dad's just like, hey,
16:01
Speaker 4: you know, my son's Hudson. Like hey, Hudson, just say
16:03
Speaker 4: you know, you're okay, you know, and he's like yeah,
16:08
Speaker 4: I'm like and he was like he was upset, and
16:10
Speaker 4: I was upset. I like couldn't like do anything the
16:13
Speaker 4: whole day. I couldn't eat, I couldn't like do my
16:16
Speaker 4: household stuff, Like I couldn't drive to him because now
16:19
Speaker 4: he's three hours away. And the dad was like, they're
16:21
Speaker 4: gonna play their game and they're gonna come back, like
16:23
Speaker 4: the last thing I want him to do is like
16:24
Speaker 4: now play hockey. They had to get in a car
16:27
Speaker 4: with like another like parent, you know who. I was like, Okay,
16:30
Speaker 4: who are they going with?
16:32
Speaker 3: Now?
16:32
Speaker 4: When you guys coming home, they're making detours on the
16:35
Speaker 4: way home, like they're grabbing something to eat, like the
16:38
Speaker 4: team wants to do, like a daven Busters thing. I'm like,
16:42
Speaker 4: bring my son home. Like so now I always tell
16:45
Speaker 4: him like if mommy or Daddy can't bring you, you're
16:47
Speaker 4: not going like playing and stuff on it. And it
16:50
Speaker 4: sucks for us because we have six kids, and now
16:53
Speaker 4: six kids have to like be lugved on a weekend
16:56
Speaker 4: to mumble wherever for a hockey tournament or you know,
17:00
Speaker 4: a game at six am. But you know, I'd rather than.
17:04
Speaker 3: Be safe kids.
17:06
Speaker 4: My oldest is ten. Then I have a nine year
17:08
Speaker 4: old girl. Then I have a seven year old girl.
17:11
Speaker 4: I have five year old boy, and then a two
17:13
Speaker 4: year old boy and a nine month old boy. So
17:16
Speaker 4: he did the same thing that I did, Yeah restarted. Yeah,
17:20
Speaker 4: So it was all like twenty months apart. And then
17:23
Speaker 4: then I was like, eh, why not?
17:26
Speaker 2: Yeah, I had four by security Oh by thirty, Oh
17:30
Speaker 2: my god, I had.
17:32
Speaker 4: Four by thirty and then all my friends were starting
17:35
Speaker 4: to get married and like they're having their first and
17:37
Speaker 4: I was like, I want another one. So he had
17:39
Speaker 4: another one and I was working, so we had like
17:43
Speaker 4: a nanny and he was home with the nanny. The
17:45
Speaker 4: other four were like big kids were in school, and
17:47
Speaker 4: I was like, he's like, oh, myself on a nanny.
17:49
Speaker 4: He needs a friend. So we had to get him
17:51
Speaker 4: a friend. So you've given Fred.
17:54
Speaker 3: That's incredible.
17:55
Speaker 4: Yeah, I want to show you the Ford transit we
17:58
Speaker 4: were looking at yesterday. The butts. This is a big butts.
18:02
Speaker 2: So the thing I will tell you about the transit.
18:04
Speaker 2: I was this close to getting the transit. You can't
18:07
Speaker 2: fit in a parking garage. Oh yeah, so that yeah,
18:13
Speaker 2: because it's too tall. So I drive a Ford Expedition
18:17
Speaker 2: Max okay, and I had ordered so my youngest is
18:21
Speaker 2: two and a half. So three years ago, basically I
18:24
Speaker 2: found out I was pregnant a little bit more and
18:27
Speaker 2: I put in an order for a transit and there
18:30
Speaker 2: was like crazy delays, like supply chain delays, and so
18:35
Speaker 2: the guy was so sweet. I'll just say it's Coon's
18:38
Speaker 2: Motors in Maryland. If anyone needs anything, forward go to
18:41
Speaker 2: Coon's because the guy was amazing and he would text
18:44
Speaker 2: me all the time like encouragement, I think it'll be
18:48
Speaker 2: ready by the time you have your baby. How are
18:51
Speaker 2: you feeling? And he doesn't get a commission. He just
18:54
Speaker 2: like was so invested in me getting my car before
18:56
Speaker 2: I had my baby, and then when I hit like
18:58
Speaker 2: seven months, he's like, so, I'm not gonna lie, I'm
19:01
Speaker 2: not really feeling that great about this anymore. I think
19:05
Speaker 2: you need a plan B. Because he knew I couldn't
19:08
Speaker 2: fit a sixth baby in my current that current car.
19:11
Speaker 3: But he couldn't make source it or something. He couldn't
19:14
Speaker 3: find it right.
19:14
Speaker 2: Well, no, so it was more expensive to buy it
19:17
Speaker 2: used than it was to order it new. So I
19:21
Speaker 2: ordered Yeah, like because of this crazy supply chain stuff.
19:24
Speaker 2: So I ordered a new one and it never got made.
19:28
Speaker 2: So I was talking to a friend who has nine children,
19:34
Speaker 2: maybe eighth, maybe ten, who really knows for sure, eight
19:39
Speaker 2: nine tens, somewhere in that range, and she we were
19:42
Speaker 2: meeting up in Baltimore for a science museum or something,
19:48
Speaker 2: and I sent her the GPS coordinates for the garage
19:51
Speaker 2: that I always use when I go to downtown Baltimore,
19:53
Speaker 2: and she said, I don't fit in that garage. I
19:55
Speaker 2: don't fit in any garage. I have to find an
19:59
Speaker 2: open air park a lot, which was like really hard
20:01
Speaker 2: to do. It was like not in a safe neighborhood.
20:04
Speaker 2: And I was like, wait a second, you can't fit
20:07
Speaker 2: in any garages. And I just sort of ran through
20:10
Speaker 2: my life and how garage dependent my life is, which
20:15
Speaker 2: I didn't realize. Sure Costco DC, Baltimore, like all the
20:21
Speaker 2: fun things that we do, everything is a garage. And
20:24
Speaker 2: I canceled the order, and I did so much research
20:28
Speaker 2: to find a eight seater that had enough room for
20:33
Speaker 2: six because I'm a car seat nut, so my oldest
20:37
Speaker 2: kids are still in booster seats and so I needed
20:41
Speaker 2: six apparatuses to be able to fit in the back.
20:44
Speaker 2: And so I did so much research to find the
20:46
Speaker 2: biggest internally the biggest eight seater on the market, and
20:51
Speaker 2: I ended up with my Ford Expedition Max, which I hate.
20:55
Speaker 4: I have a suburban right now. Similar we have a suburban,
21:00
Speaker 4: then we have a minivan. I love my minivan because
21:02
Speaker 4: it's like super simple and like boop open the door,
21:05
Speaker 4: bye guys, boop close the door.
21:06
Speaker 2: I don't even have to like get out, is it
21:08
Speaker 2: an eight seat or also.
21:09
Speaker 4: It's a seven. Both of them are seven. So you know,
21:13
Speaker 4: we have a beach house in South Jersey and we
21:15
Speaker 4: have a mountain house like up in the Poconos, and
21:17
Speaker 4: it's like every weekend that we're traveling somewhere, it's like, okay,
21:21
Speaker 4: what are we gonna do, Like are we gonna take
21:23
Speaker 4: two cars or are we gonna like be really unsafe
21:27
Speaker 4: and not like put someone somewhere. What we've been doing
21:32
Speaker 4: is we have like a car seat for the baby
21:35
Speaker 4: who's nine months, and we're like attaching it to the
21:37
Speaker 4: floor between the two seats, like oh yeah, super not safe,
21:41
Speaker 4: but like okay, it's working, and it's like it's maneuvered
21:44
Speaker 4: in there, and then like we're tying. It's just so stupid,
21:48
Speaker 4: but it's really not safe. So we're like, okay, we
21:51
Speaker 4: need to figure it out. And of course, both of
21:53
Speaker 4: my cars are nearly paid off, and I'm like, now
21:56
Speaker 4: I'm gonna like restart this, and like, I mean, I
22:01
Speaker 4: don't know about you, but you understand that cars literally
22:04
Speaker 4: depreciate by the hour. With all these kids, like a
22:07
Speaker 4: donut is over here, you know, they're pulling out the lights, Like,
22:11
Speaker 4: I'm like, why are you guys touching everything? Who's coloring?
22:15
Speaker 4: You know? As strict as I am, it's still like
22:18
Speaker 4: a mess constantly.
22:20
Speaker 2: When we sold our minivan, the company made a mistake
22:24
Speaker 2: and didn't inspect the inside before they gave us the check.
22:28
Speaker 2: I loved it and then they opened it and were.
22:30
Speaker 4: Like, oh, I love it.
22:33
Speaker 1: I love it.
22:34
Speaker 4: I did hear from a friend that we're supposed to
22:36
Speaker 4: do is call like Carvana and tell them that you
22:38
Speaker 4: want a check. Be like, we want to check. Don't
22:41
Speaker 4: like deposit it right into my account. Bring me the
22:45
Speaker 4: check when you pick up the car. And then they
22:46
Speaker 4: have the check and then they see the car and
22:49
Speaker 4: they're like ooh, You're like you tell me you're ready
22:52
Speaker 4: here and they're like, all right, here's a check, and
22:54
Speaker 4: they're like, you buy car. That's what I started.
22:57
Speaker 2: We decided when we bought this car to buy like
23:01
Speaker 2: the heavy, dutiest floor mats possible because we would have
23:08
Speaker 2: a spill in the car whatever and then there would
23:12
Speaker 2: be it's like an archaeological dig in my car, like
23:16
Speaker 2: you can see like a winter layer and then the
23:18
Speaker 2: spring layer. And so if you had a spill in
23:23
Speaker 2: the prehistoric times and then and then the layers. When
23:28
Speaker 2: you take the layers off, it's just mold. And so
23:31
Speaker 2: that's what we had in our minivan. It was disgusting,
23:36
Speaker 2: but they had so then we we bought these like
23:38
Speaker 2: heavy heavy duty floor mats so that we don't have
23:41
Speaker 2: that again.
23:42
Speaker 3: Can you just wash it down there?
23:45
Speaker 2: Yeah, and we have so before passover. Passover is when
23:48
Speaker 2: we clean out our car once a year.
23:50
Speaker 4: It's disgusting. Yeah, car, are you in like a like
23:56
Speaker 4: a Mercedes top down?
23:59
Speaker 2: No?
24:00
Speaker 3: I have a pickup truck which is comic Cley Bake
24:04
Speaker 3: and just doesn't look like I should be driving it.
24:06
Speaker 3: And then I hop out and like people laugh.
24:08
Speaker 4: Baby.
24:09
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah. Nick has like six cars, but none of
24:13
Speaker 3: them are baby friendly. And he he believes when he
24:18
Speaker 3: buys them every single time that he can squeeze a
24:23
Speaker 3: car seat in the back. And we took one of
24:26
Speaker 3: them out the other day and he was like, oh,
24:28
Speaker 3: let's take the dog. Let's put the dog in the back.
24:29
Speaker 3: We didn't have the baby, and like, you couldn't even
24:32
Speaker 3: fit the dog. So never minded car seat. So yeah,
24:37
Speaker 3: he has delusions. That's so funny.
24:40
Speaker 4: We'll be like I just just put her on the roof.
24:42
Speaker 4: She gonna be all right, crazy.
24:45
Speaker 3: No, I love my pickup truck, but it's five seats,
24:48
Speaker 3: so we'll have to stick to three.
24:51
Speaker 2: Yeah, or you'll just have to buy another car, which
24:54
Speaker 2: is what I U.
25:05
Speaker 1: Hello. I'm James Lenwix and I'm at the diner, you know,
25:09
Speaker 1: classic American diner chrome long boomerang pattern for mich Account
25:13
Speaker 1: with little jukeboxes. We love these and you can join
25:16
Speaker 1: me here every Saturday, where we talk about whatever happens
25:18
Speaker 1: to spring into my mind at the moment. There's no
25:20
Speaker 1: predicting where it will go, except that it'll be done
25:23
Speaker 1: in about thirty minutes. Join me, won't you? Every Saturday
25:26
Speaker 1: for the Ricochet Audio.
25:27
Speaker 5: Network Ricochet yea, join the conversation.
25:40
Speaker 2: I am waiting for Elon Musk to make a Teslamony
25:44
Speaker 2: Dawn same. Can we, like Twitter shame him somehow into
25:48
Speaker 2: doing it, or shame him I would.
25:51
Speaker 3: Still on the I feel like Elon is so like
25:56
Speaker 3: down with conservatives now He's.
25:58
Speaker 2: Just like, no, I need a car, doesn't do you?
26:02
Speaker 3: You want to tesl her anyway?
26:04
Speaker 2: So I mean, yeah, yeah, I'm feeling the cyber truck
26:11
Speaker 2: like I'm like probably one of like nobody who loves it?
26:15
Speaker 2: I see it.
26:16
Speaker 4: I'm like, can we use this as a write off?
26:18
Speaker 4: Can we like put our lenks on on the side,
26:20
Speaker 4: like you know, like I love it. My husband he
26:23
Speaker 4: owns sports complexes. It's like birthday parties, camps, after school
26:28
Speaker 4: things like. It's we have a couple that we're just
26:30
Speaker 4: building our fourth So I'm like, now, I'm like, oh,
26:34
Speaker 4: you know, what can we do to write off things?
26:38
Speaker 4: I'm like, get me a Faber truck. They're heavy, you know,
26:41
Speaker 4: but like, who do you fit in there?
26:43
Speaker 2: How much?
26:44
Speaker 3: I don't even know. I have no idea.
26:46
Speaker 4: I don't know how much they are, like total, But
26:50
Speaker 4: my friend has one and I asked her how much
26:52
Speaker 4: he's paying a month and she said one thousand dollars.
26:54
Speaker 4: So that's no more than like the suburbans out there,
26:57
Speaker 4: you know, which is ridicul Yeah, we'll never get ahead
27:01
Speaker 4: in life when we're doing this.
27:03
Speaker 2: Oh, it's actually not bad. It's only seventy thousand. I
27:05
Speaker 2: just looked it up.
27:07
Speaker 3: Isn't it crazy that every single calc seventy thousand dollars
27:10
Speaker 3: in Like when did that happen?
27:12
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's because of all of this stuff. They went
27:15
Speaker 2: up when all of the chip when there was the
27:17
Speaker 2: chip shortage, and then they never went back down, right,
27:22
Speaker 2: So we'd got our our Ford Expedition Max used from Enterprise.
27:27
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's great. Yeah, And so you know that
27:30
Speaker 2: it's been like serviced regularly. Has it been like super
27:35
Speaker 2: well treated? No, because it was a rental car. But
27:37
Speaker 2: we got the best possible warranty plan on it. So
27:42
Speaker 2: it's like fought for years or something ridiculous.
27:45
Speaker 4: Oh that's great. Yeah, No, Enterprise is great.
27:48
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think our transmission is about to fall out,
27:51
Speaker 2: so we'll see how the warranty.
27:53
Speaker 4: Is check, we'll feel it out. But we've been paying
27:57
Speaker 4: for for the last five years.
27:58
Speaker 3: Right.
27:59
Speaker 2: Yeah. I called Coons again to fix my car when
28:04
Speaker 2: because I've had the check engine light on and off
28:07
Speaker 2: and I pray it away and then it goes away,
28:09
Speaker 2: but then it comes back, and then it goes away
28:11
Speaker 2: and then it comes back. And so I called Koons
28:13
Speaker 2: again and they said, we'll wait until it comes in,
28:16
Speaker 2: and they said, when you do give it to us,
28:19
Speaker 2: and you think it's the transmission, and we agree with you,
28:22
Speaker 2: it's probably the transmission because that's like a known problem
28:24
Speaker 2: with this car. You can anticipate not having it back
28:27
Speaker 2: for three weeks.
28:29
Speaker 4: Oh, and I was like, well, make sure you email
28:32
Speaker 4: that woman that your kids are going to be walking
28:35
Speaker 4: and to watch out for them.
28:36
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, someone could snatch them. I'm like, good luck
28:40
Speaker 2: to you if you snatch.
28:41
Speaker 4: Wait, was it a.
28:41
Speaker 3: Woman or a man that that would be interesting tonight?
28:44
Speaker 2: The name was Louise, So I'm going to say it
28:46
Speaker 2: was a woman, but you never know, you never know,
28:50
Speaker 2: you never know.
28:51
Speaker 4: Fantasizudgment Louise.
28:56
Speaker 2: So we before we started recording, we were talking a
29:00
Speaker 2: little bit and then I interrupted and I said, save
29:02
Speaker 2: it for the pod. So now we're on the pod.
29:07
Speaker 2: So I was talking to someone today about a summer
29:11
Speaker 2: camp that their kids go to and their kids are
29:13
Speaker 2: like public school kids and my kids are sheltered home
29:16
Speaker 2: school children. And she's telling me about this super duper
29:20
Speaker 2: cheap camp that is run by our county. But then
29:23
Speaker 2: she started telling me like some of the programming, like NIH,
29:27
Speaker 2: the National Institute of Health, because I live in DC,
29:29
Speaker 2: so NIH does programming for this random camp. They came
29:32
Speaker 2: and like talked about like alcohol awareness to twelve year olds,
29:35
Speaker 2: and I was like, I don't, like, yeah, I don't
29:39
Speaker 2: think that's fun. That's not a good that's not a
29:42
Speaker 2: good activity.
29:43
Speaker 4: That's not good activity.
29:44
Speaker 2: And I feel like it puts ideas into their heads
29:47
Speaker 2: for sure. And you were talking a little bit about
29:51
Speaker 2: balancing having the talk with your older children and and
29:57
Speaker 2: all of that, and we are starting to get there
30:00
Speaker 2: a little bit. Am I. Well, this is eleven and
30:02
Speaker 2: a half. My son is ten. I think that I'm
30:05
Speaker 2: going to ditch that conversation with my son on my
30:08
Speaker 2: husband good idea, Right, I don't really want to have
30:12
Speaker 2: that conversation with him, nor do I really know what
30:14
Speaker 2: to say, Like, what happens to your balls? I don't know?
30:16
Speaker 4: Yeah, well that's true.
30:18
Speaker 2: I don't know what happens.
30:19
Speaker 4: I don't know.
30:20
Speaker 2: So how are you navigating this? Because your kids were
30:23
Speaker 2: in private and then you and then you moved, right,
30:27
Speaker 2: and then you went public after the.
30:29
Speaker 4: Move, correct, So you know, when you go to public,
30:32
Speaker 4: you're in with with a ton of different kids, right,
30:36
Speaker 4: And I'd have to say, like we are in a
30:37
Speaker 4: like a conservative area, and for the most part, parents
30:42
Speaker 4: are doing a really good job with their kids. There's
30:44
Speaker 4: no you know, crazy stories that you hear. I mean
30:49
Speaker 4: sometimes I can tell you the story if you really
30:52
Speaker 4: wanted to hear it. But that has a Super Ball
30:53
Speaker 4: party at my house. We'll get to that. Well, I'll
30:55
Speaker 4: say this first and then we'll go back to that. Anyway,
30:58
Speaker 4: I have Super Bowl party at my house, and I'm
30:59
Speaker 4: like the souper strict parent, but I'm also like super fun.
31:02
Speaker 4: So I'm like, yeah, you want to have a party,
31:03
Speaker 4: Let's have a party here. I have a ton of
31:05
Speaker 4: food out, like all the stuff. We have soda, where
31:08
Speaker 4: like my kids don't really drink soda. Okay, by the
31:11
Speaker 4: end of the night, the kids all got these soda
31:13
Speaker 4: cans and the basement of my house shaking it, opening
31:17
Speaker 4: the cans, spraying it. Oh my god, and they said.
31:22
Speaker 4: One of the kids said, it's a diddy party. Now
31:24
Speaker 4: you can suck my dick. And when I tell you,
31:27
Speaker 4: I was like, part old is over. He was ten
31:32
Speaker 4: fourth freed.
31:33
Speaker 3: That is insane.
31:35
Speaker 4: And now I have younger girls who had friends over.
31:39
Speaker 4: I had younger boy with friends over. Okay, the babies
31:41
Speaker 4: don't know nothing. But like now, my husband he doesn't
31:45
Speaker 4: drink a lot, neither do I. Like, we don't really
31:47
Speaker 4: drink ever. I think my husband might have had like
31:49
Speaker 4: one beer and he like chuckled when he heard that,
31:52
Speaker 4: where I like saw a fire, you know, so I
31:55
Speaker 4: like gave everyone a towel. I said, everyone's going to
31:58
Speaker 4: clean the house, and everyone's gonna wait on my front
32:00
Speaker 4: and wait for mom and dad to pick you up.
32:01
Speaker 4: And literally texted the group and was like pick up
32:04
Speaker 4: these kids, like inappropriate behavior, like a how do you
32:07
Speaker 4: how do your kids know what a Diddy party is?
32:10
Speaker 4: How do you how do they know what Diddy is?
32:11
Speaker 4: You know? I had to now explain that to my kid. Also,
32:15
Speaker 4: they took my dick like I didn't even think my
32:17
Speaker 4: ten year old knew what to like, you know what
32:19
Speaker 4: I mean, Like I'm sure if you know something's in
32:20
Speaker 4: his pants, but like we don't call it a dick,
32:22
Speaker 4: you know. Like it was so inappropriate. So it's just
32:27
Speaker 4: like that level.
32:28
Speaker 2: Did you do with the other mother of the kids?
32:31
Speaker 4: Well, I basically I just sent them like a text
32:34
Speaker 4: and the group and I was just like pick up immediately.
32:38
Speaker 2: But there were other parents on that group text right correct.
32:41
Speaker 4: And one mom like got got me and she's like
32:44
Speaker 4: I will be there in three minutes. I will take
32:46
Speaker 4: all the boys. So she picked them all up and
32:48
Speaker 4: dropped them all home. And then I got like written
32:51
Speaker 4: apologies from each of the boys, even though it was
32:53
Speaker 4: really only one of the boys, and all of the
32:56
Speaker 4: parents called me and apologized, and they're like, oh, you know,
32:58
Speaker 4: the kids get calor cat right away.
33:00
Speaker 2: I mean, but there's a difference between doing something stupid
33:04
Speaker 2: with the soda cans and what that child.
33:06
Speaker 4: Said exactly, you know, and like now I'm judging you
33:10
Speaker 4: as a parent, where like I thought, like how you're like, oh,
33:13
Speaker 4: I know these people, my kids are gonna go sleep
33:15
Speaker 4: there like you think, you know, until you like unveil
33:21
Speaker 4: something when they're either not around or I don't know
33:23
Speaker 4: how to explain it. Like mom and dad they went
33:26
Speaker 4: to like I'm Catholic, they went to like Catholic schools
33:30
Speaker 4: like by us we have like all boys school, all
33:32
Speaker 4: girls' school, you know, And it's like, yeah, those communities
33:35
Speaker 4: are a little bit more sheltered the parents up in
33:37
Speaker 4: those kind of communities.
33:39
Speaker 2: Does that mother know what her child said?
33:43
Speaker 4: I think so, because the because they were very like apologetic,
33:48
Speaker 4: I didn't repeat it back to them. I really didn't
33:51
Speaker 4: repeat it to any parent that otherwise like called me
33:54
Speaker 4: because I didn't write that in the chap. But you know,
33:58
Speaker 4: I think they knew. I mean they based on the
34:01
Speaker 4: think I mean the sorry noteset of God and the
34:04
Speaker 4: flowers and the mail and the whole thing. Like you know,
34:08
Speaker 4: I mean it's it wasn't cool. So it's like when
34:11
Speaker 4: you're trying to now teach your kids things, it's like
34:15
Speaker 4: they're learning things from their peers, right, who are like
34:19
Speaker 4: even bigger teachers than we are. So it's like that's
34:23
Speaker 4: why I keep having kids. I'm like, this is your community,
34:26
Speaker 4: these are your friends. Like you don't believe this, Like
34:30
Speaker 4: it's like you want to balance, right, because you learn
34:32
Speaker 4: so much from the people around you. And like, for
34:34
Speaker 4: the most part, we really surround ourselves with great people.
34:38
Speaker 4: We have like great friends, a great community really, you know,
34:43
Speaker 4: nice networks of things. So like when my kids like
34:47
Speaker 4: need internships or this, and you know, like we have
34:49
Speaker 4: people around us who are willing to help and you
34:52
Speaker 4: know what I mean, like be there for your kids,
34:54
Speaker 4: good coaches for the sports and the whole thing. But
34:57
Speaker 4: it's like at the same time, like I'm judging you
34:59
Speaker 4: if if you're if you're teaching your kids this that
35:02
Speaker 4: or whatever. You know, maybe I had a schedule.
35:06
Speaker 2: I will say my children's So my dad Seth says
35:11
Speaker 2: that I can't use this excuse, but I think I
35:13
Speaker 2: can use any excuse I want. I curse a lot. Okay,
35:17
Speaker 2: So I'm from Long Island. My dad is a truck driver.
35:22
Speaker 2: That's just who I am.
35:24
Speaker 4: Right.
35:24
Speaker 2: My children curse a lot and use them accurately.
35:29
Speaker 4: Okay.
35:30
Speaker 2: They they know what words mean and they deploy them expertly.
35:35
Speaker 2: I'm a little proud sometimes and like my two year old,
35:40
Speaker 2: like a couple of months ago, dropped something and it
35:44
Speaker 2: broke it. Oh, and then he said the S word,
35:46
Speaker 2: and I was like, yeah, Okay, I think we use
35:49
Speaker 2: that correctly. I can't say, can't say I've betve been mad,
35:54
Speaker 2: but I when my kids do curse, which is a lot,
36:00
Speaker 2: I'm well, this is why we can't go to school,
36:02
Speaker 2: because people will judge us because these are the things
36:04
Speaker 2: my children say. That's said that like this is a
36:08
Speaker 2: diddy party, and that like sexual expletive, Yeah is troubling. Yes,
36:14
Speaker 2: that's more than language, that's like right, yeah, but.
36:20
Speaker 3: He's also a ten year old boy.
36:21
Speaker 2: I mean eating something.
36:24
Speaker 3: Yeah, But I don't know if it's like evidence of
36:27
Speaker 3: like something going on at home or just like I
36:30
Speaker 3: don't know. I feel like ten year old boys are
36:33
Speaker 3: just always kind of trying to push boundaries.
36:35
Speaker 4: You know, I agree to an extent because like I
36:40
Speaker 4: have a ten year old, like sweetheart, angelic child that
36:44
Speaker 4: is like he's like he's outgoing when he needs to be.
36:47
Speaker 4: He's super athletic, he's so respectful. Every girl mom in
36:52
Speaker 4: town calls me, text me. Hudson is just such a
36:55
Speaker 4: good kid. Even Cruz is such a good kid, like
36:57
Speaker 4: he's They're so nice with the girls. I don't know
37:00
Speaker 4: because they have sisters or like what we're teaching, Like
37:03
Speaker 4: we're teaching like respect for sure, and it's like also
37:07
Speaker 4: like thank God for my husband who comes in and
37:10
Speaker 4: like treats me very good and the whole thing. So
37:12
Speaker 4: I think they learn from that. But then at the
37:15
Speaker 4: same time, yeah, they have like the baseball talk on
37:18
Speaker 4: the sideline or the hockey talk, like you know, they're
37:22
Speaker 4: they chirp at each other, which is like you know,
37:25
Speaker 4: crazy talk to each other. But at the same time,
37:27
Speaker 4: it's like you gotta, I guess, know your crowd and
37:31
Speaker 4: know what's like acceptable and what's not acceptable, like at
37:34
Speaker 4: your friend's house when like, yeah, the parents are there,
37:38
Speaker 4: like for you to even for you to even say
37:40
Speaker 4: that while he's like in the house of the room,
37:42
Speaker 4: like you got big balls.
37:45
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, like I would never.
37:48
Speaker 4: I would never. And I was a not to say,
37:50
Speaker 4: a bad kid, but like I was in the Saturday
37:53
Speaker 4: detentions very often.
37:54
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was a bad kid, you know.
37:56
Speaker 4: Like definitely not a rule follower. Like I can't bake
38:00
Speaker 4: because I won't listen to the directions, you know, like
38:04
Speaker 4: it's really serious. So you know, like I I still
38:09
Speaker 4: I don't know. I just I just know my kids
38:12
Speaker 4: would never. I think that they fear me too much,
38:15
Speaker 4: you know. And then like you're trying to like find
38:17
Speaker 4: a balance, right, like to make the narrative when you're
38:21
Speaker 4: teaching your kids something new. You wanted to get them
38:24
Speaker 4: to hear your voice, you know. When I'm thinking about this,
38:28
Speaker 4: this is what mom says. It means you know.
38:30
Speaker 2: Yeah, So how do you go from so I'm also
38:34
Speaker 2: a bad kid. How do you go from a bad
38:38
Speaker 2: kid to like a stand up Catholic mom of six children?
38:42
Speaker 4: I think it's because you knew you know too much,
38:46
Speaker 4: you know, Like, and I also think like I kept
38:50
Speaker 4: so much from my parents because they were just like
38:53
Speaker 4: these old school Italian people who were like didn't let
38:56
Speaker 4: me do much like I was the oldest of my
38:59
Speaker 4: four like poor siblings, and it was, you know, very
39:02
Speaker 4: much like I was made the example of right. So
39:05
Speaker 4: every time I did something wrong, and I was like,
39:08
Speaker 4: I guess a little boy crazy when I was younger,
39:10
Speaker 4: Like but I'm saying, like fifteen sixteen years old, like
39:13
Speaker 4: I was into boys. They weren't like having it. But
39:16
Speaker 4: I got married young out of it. I guess, like whatever,
39:20
Speaker 4: but I really know, like what things are out there, like, oh,
39:26
Speaker 4: you going to a movie really with who? Like, oh
39:29
Speaker 4: is that so and so gonna be there? I know
39:31
Speaker 4: where to find you. I feel like now I feel
39:34
Speaker 4: bad for the kids because like we got ring cameras.
39:36
Speaker 4: We got cameras in the house, Like you can't sneak
39:39
Speaker 4: anybody in, you know. I had my in laws the
39:42
Speaker 4: other day and I was saying to my kids, I
39:44
Speaker 4: was like, you see that.
39:45
Speaker 6: Little window over there, and they're like yeah. I was
39:46
Speaker 6: like I used to sneak into daddy's room right there,
39:48
Speaker 6: and they're like.
39:49
Speaker 4: What And my husband's like, don't say that, like you know,
39:52
Speaker 4: and it's so funny how like things are different. They'll
39:56
Speaker 4: never be able to do that.
39:57
Speaker 2: The number of things that I've caught on that ring camera.
40:00
Speaker 2: Yeah and them, Yeah, yeah, I mean I I caught.
40:08
Speaker 2: So I caught some of my children. So their best
40:10
Speaker 2: friends used to live across the street, and they decided
40:14
Speaker 2: to have a midnight rendezvous. And it's like, this was
40:19
Speaker 2: like two years ago. This was like and they were
40:22
Speaker 2: gonna have a midnight rendezvous and the ring cameras on
40:26
Speaker 2: both parents' houses caught them. And there's been a lot
40:32
Speaker 2: of times where one of my children will allow the
40:37
Speaker 2: younger two children out of the house and like egg
40:40
Speaker 2: them on to do things or whatever, and it's all
40:42
Speaker 2: on the ring. So crazy.
40:46
Speaker 4: Wait, I love that they they're doing that, which I.
40:50
Speaker 2: Think it's dead. I have to text Seth to fix
40:52
Speaker 2: the fix it because I also, I mean it's it
40:55
Speaker 2: had it dings me every time the door opens and closes.
40:58
Speaker 2: That is helpful when you have a round.
41:00
Speaker 4: Yeah, I definitely need that.
41:03
Speaker 3: Wait, I love how the kids are like egging them
41:05
Speaker 3: on though. That's so funny.
41:06
Speaker 2: It took cute And I'm like, but I heard you, Like,
41:10
Speaker 2: I see you open the door and I'll show the
41:13
Speaker 2: child in question the video. I'm like this is you
41:16
Speaker 2: opening the door, This is you telling them to leave
41:18
Speaker 2: the home, and this is you telling them to go
41:20
Speaker 2: down the block. It has audio, honey, and this child
41:25
Speaker 2: never it never sinks in ye.
41:28
Speaker 4: Like, nah, that wasn't me. No, I literally have it
41:31
Speaker 4: on you. That's funny.
41:35
Speaker 2: I'm texting Seth right now.
41:38
Speaker 1: Wait.
41:38
Speaker 3: I have a question because as I tell more and
41:42
Speaker 3: more people that I'm pregnant, which I shouldn't be doing,
41:45
Speaker 3: I am okay, I'm getting like insane reactions, people like
41:52
Speaker 3: oh my god, but the other one has only just
41:53
Speaker 3: come out, Like why would you do this? It's crazy,
41:56
Speaker 3: like be prepared, you know this, to hate people, to
42:01
Speaker 3: be horrible. I know it's just like a really unhelpful
42:05
Speaker 3: thing to say now, but how do you get like
42:08
Speaker 3: how do you deal with that? More and more and more,
42:11
Speaker 3: I guess people might just give up at a point
42:13
Speaker 3: if you get to six, you know.
42:15
Speaker 4: No, they love each other like you realize how big
42:19
Speaker 4: your heart is. They're best friends. Like if I show
42:23
Speaker 4: you all my videos of my two kids who are
42:25
Speaker 4: fourteen months apart, they are like inseparable. They love each other.
42:29
Speaker 4: When they one wakes up the other one smiling and
42:31
Speaker 4: cheer like they're so delicious together. Yeah, like it's not
42:35
Speaker 4: always a picnic, right, and like sometimes two kids are
42:38
Speaker 4: crying at the same time. But like every person who
42:41
Speaker 4: says that to you, like I almost want you to
42:43
Speaker 4: just like slap them or like say bad words because
42:48
Speaker 4: you know, every for every bad comment, the good comments
42:52
Speaker 4: are just like so good. Like you're gonna have such
42:56
Speaker 4: full tables when you grow up, or you're gonna be
42:58
Speaker 4: constantly surrounded by family, Like that is like super important
43:04
Speaker 4: to me, And like you're giving your child the best
43:07
Speaker 4: guest good of a sibling, you know, like they have
43:09
Speaker 4: someone to fight with, they have somebody to be there with,
43:13
Speaker 4: like you know, to tell before they want to tell
43:15
Speaker 4: you something Like there's just so many I mean, I
43:18
Speaker 4: don't know if you have siblings, which just so it's
43:21
Speaker 4: it's truly like the best, the best gifts. Like anytime
43:25
Speaker 4: I had issues, Like I was super close with my
43:27
Speaker 4: one brother because it was me. I had two brothers
43:30
Speaker 4: and then a sister who was twelve years younger than me,
43:33
Speaker 4: so it was almost more like her mom than her sister.
43:36
Speaker 4: Now me and her are super close, but like I'll
43:38
Speaker 4: ask my brother for advice all the time, Like before Hey,
43:41
Speaker 4: I don't want to tell mommy and Daddy this, like
43:43
Speaker 4: what do you think?
43:44
Speaker 2: You know?
43:45
Speaker 4: And it's just so good, So I think, like I'm
43:49
Speaker 4: so happy for you. I think I wish you a
43:52
Speaker 4: happy and healthy pregnancy, and like I can't even sometimes
43:57
Speaker 4: even like the closest people are your biggest critics, right right,
44:00
Speaker 4: like yeah, because I'm sure it could have been like
44:03
Speaker 4: a parent, like really, like you haven't even enjoyed this
44:05
Speaker 4: one yet, and like now you're doing another one.
44:08
Speaker 3: Sometimes I wonder, though, if it's just like because a
44:10
Speaker 3: lot of people who have said stuff like that to
44:12
Speaker 3: me love kids and have kids and don't seem particularly
44:19
Speaker 3: overwhelmed with the kids that they have, So sometimes I
44:22
Speaker 3: wonder if it's just like something that they say and
44:25
Speaker 3: don't really mean, right, or maybe like a thing that
44:28
Speaker 3: people say now.
44:29
Speaker 4: Or it's like having kids is my thing, you know
44:33
Speaker 4: what I'm saying, Like, yeah, I mean, what do you
44:38
Speaker 4: think that?
44:38
Speaker 3: Two?
44:39
Speaker 2: D two is hard? Like I've done it many times,
44:43
Speaker 2: but again, like the relationships are so wonderful. So my
44:48
Speaker 2: oldest two or seventeen months apart, which I think you'll
44:51
Speaker 2: basically have, right, how far apart will they be?
44:54
Speaker 3: Eighteen months.
44:54
Speaker 2: Yeah, so basically we've seen it. So they were inseparable,
45:00
Speaker 2: code dependent for several years until like four or five,
45:04
Speaker 2: I would say, And then they really hit the skids
45:07
Speaker 2: for a few years, and it was really bad, constant fighting,
45:13
Speaker 2: really mean, like it was really sad. One of the
45:16
Speaker 2: things that I think is nice about having multiple children
45:19
Speaker 2: is that you realize that your child isn't like the
45:23
Speaker 2: perfect person on the planet, because my mom thought that
45:26
Speaker 2: about me. And I see my kids being absolute jerks
45:31
Speaker 2: to each other, and I'm like, you are all in
45:33
Speaker 2: perfect people, and I am mad, you're being mean to
45:36
Speaker 2: my other kid, and I'm on that kid's side. Whatever.
45:40
Speaker 2: But then they went to camp together two years ago,
45:44
Speaker 2: right or a year ago, I think it was a
45:47
Speaker 2: year ago, and they only had each other at camp,
45:50
Speaker 2: like they had cousins there, they had you know whatever.
45:52
Speaker 2: But when her brother got to she was there for
45:56
Speaker 2: a full month, and halfway through that month he came
45:58
Speaker 2: for the last two weeks. And when he came, she
46:01
Speaker 2: was sitting and waiting for the van to drive up,
46:04
Speaker 2: and they hung out as much as they could. They
46:07
Speaker 2: talked all the time. She showed him around camp and
46:10
Speaker 2: that camp experience for two weeks together, like was really
46:14
Speaker 2: transformative for their relationship. And they came home and like,
46:19
Speaker 2: almost never fight now. I think I can remember one
46:22
Speaker 2: fight and it was actually today and it was not
46:24
Speaker 2: even a fight. He was like mad that I took
46:26
Speaker 2: her side about something, and they're just like they're friends
46:31
Speaker 2: and they're help each other and it's just really nice.
46:34
Speaker 2: And I didn't have that growing up, and so I
46:36
Speaker 2: didn't realize the value of it.
46:38
Speaker 4: Did you grow up as an only trial?
46:39
Speaker 2: Yeah?
46:40
Speaker 4: Oh wow, both of you.
46:42
Speaker 2: Yeah, these single moms too.
46:45
Speaker 4: Yeah.
46:46
Speaker 2: And so today my oldest is at a sleepover and
46:50
Speaker 2: my four year old literally cried himself to sleep. He
46:54
Speaker 2: misses his sister who's at the sleepover and I'm not
46:59
Speaker 2: a good parent. And I was like, well, just wait,
47:01
Speaker 2: she's gonna be gone for a month soon as camp.
47:04
Speaker 2: And then he was like what.
47:10
Speaker 4: Really, you're really very in the lad but oh poor baby.
47:14
Speaker 1: Yeah.
47:15
Speaker 2: But I love. I love the codependency.
47:17
Speaker 3: I love.
47:18
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so sweet and it's nothing that I expected,
47:23
Speaker 2: but I just I love I love seeing all the relationships,
47:26
Speaker 2: and because I have six, there's so many different permutations
47:31
Speaker 2: of them. My oldest son, who's my second, is super
47:36
Speaker 2: close with my youngest who's two, and he'll like run
47:40
Speaker 2: around and hold him and sing to him and tackle him.
47:44
Speaker 2: He's They're very physical, they have a very like and
47:47
Speaker 2: I'm like.
47:47
Speaker 4: Please be more gentle.
47:49
Speaker 2: And he's only two, you're ten. But it's just it's
47:54
Speaker 2: really fun. It's really fun, and so I'm I'm on
47:56
Speaker 2: a mission. This whole podcast is actually just to convince
48:01
Speaker 2: car to keep on having babies, but not to stop feeling.
48:04
Speaker 4: Let's keep bringing on all the moms with all the
48:07
Speaker 4: kids went three tops?
48:09
Speaker 3: I think three tops, Yeah, that's what I said. But
48:13
Speaker 3: I mean when you go to three, like, you already
48:16
Speaker 3: have more kids than you have parents, so you.
48:18
Speaker 4: Might as well. I honestly, I mean I think I
48:23
Speaker 4: forgot who was Jerry Seinfeld. I think he said something like,
48:27
Speaker 4: you know, we're hanging out with people with one kid
48:29
Speaker 4: and they're two uptight and then two kids. Like, man,
48:32
Speaker 4: they're doing out there, they're like three or more kids,
48:35
Speaker 4: Like something happens to the other room. They're screaming this
48:38
Speaker 4: and that. You're like, that's fine, you know, like and
48:40
Speaker 4: it's truly that way, like I invite more kids over,
48:45
Speaker 4: like if I have six kids, Okay, babies are babies,
48:48
Speaker 4: so forget them. But I usually have four plus four fronts,
48:51
Speaker 4: so everyone's allowed to bring over a friend. So I
48:53
Speaker 4: have all these kids in my house and it feels
48:55
Speaker 4: like there's less kids because they're all playing. They're keeping
48:58
Speaker 4: each other busy, and oh I'm going for a bike
49:01
Speaker 4: ride okay. Oh I'm gonna go play soccer outside. Okay.
49:03
Speaker 4: Oh we're gonna do the schooters okay, great, Like everyone's
49:06
Speaker 4: like doing something. We're gonna play American girl Dolls wonderful,
49:09
Speaker 4: you know. And it's like, I don't know. When it's
49:12
Speaker 4: one kid, it's like, Mommy, you want to play Hide
49:14
Speaker 4: and go Seek with me? Now I don't because my
49:17
Speaker 4: mommy's busy. You know, I love you, but like, no,
49:21
Speaker 4: we do family game night.
49:24
Speaker 2: Today. I had just the two and a half year
49:26
Speaker 2: old the whole day, and I was losing my mind
49:29
Speaker 2: sure because of it. And then all my all of
49:33
Speaker 2: my except my oldest daughter who was at the sleepover,
49:36
Speaker 2: My other children all had their best friend over, and
49:39
Speaker 2: so I had a lot of children in my house
49:42
Speaker 2: and it was exponentially easier to have I had ten
49:47
Speaker 2: children in my house, and that was easier than having
49:50
Speaker 2: the one child all day, right, and you.
49:52
Speaker 4: Like cut up like three apples times. All these kids.
49:55
Speaker 4: They're happy guys on a nice spop. I got some
49:57
Speaker 4: ice pops. Yeah, you know, like it's it's just so
50:01
Speaker 4: it's so good.
50:02
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, I think you know what I think you
50:05
Speaker 3: said when you were saying in children's ages that there's
50:08
Speaker 3: one year between two of them.
50:12
Speaker 4: Our youngest two or thirteen months apart. Okay, so everyone
50:16
Speaker 4: else is twenty months apart.
50:18
Speaker 3: So how how long postpossibly before you got pregnant.
50:24
Speaker 4: As soon as they turned a year, I got pregnant.
50:27
Speaker 4: It was like their first birthday. I was like, let's go.
50:30
Speaker 4: I was so me and my husband got married and
50:33
Speaker 4: I was twenty four and I was like I want
50:35
Speaker 4: four by thirty and I got two boys, two girls.
50:38
Speaker 4: I was like super thankful and like very religious. I
50:41
Speaker 4: prayed every day. I was like so happy. And then,
50:43
Speaker 4: like I said, all my friends started having babies and
50:45
Speaker 4: I was like, okay, I want another one. And then
50:48
Speaker 4: he didn't have a friend, so he needed a friend.
50:51
Speaker 4: But now we've like scientifically ended our lineage of children
50:56
Speaker 4: because like I just can't, I just can't continue. But
51:00
Speaker 4: every month I literally curse my husband because I'm like,
51:04
Speaker 4: it's not here, you know, And I'm like taking pregnancy test.
51:07
Speaker 4: He's like, can yell it's done? It's fine, And I'm like,
51:10
Speaker 4: you know, my nanny is like I saw a pregnancy
51:13
Speaker 4: tester you. I'm like, no, I promise it's not happening.
51:17
Speaker 3: Wait in your dream world? How many would it be.
51:21
Speaker 4: If there was? Like no, like I could just yeah.
51:24
Speaker 4: I just always want an infant around.
51:26
Speaker 2: I don't know how I was never ended.
51:29
Speaker 4: I just always want an infant around. It's like my
51:32
Speaker 4: brother just had a baby. I call them all the time.
51:34
Speaker 4: I'm like, how is that little baby? Send me pictures
51:37
Speaker 4: of his toes? Like I just love it. And then
51:40
Speaker 4: my cousin, like my other cousin, she just had her first.
51:43
Speaker 4: She's thirty seven, she just had her first. And you know,
51:46
Speaker 4: if she's calling me for advice, I'm like, can I
51:48
Speaker 4: just come over, like you can take a nap, a
51:51
Speaker 4: hold it.
51:52
Speaker 3: You know.
51:52
Speaker 4: I'm I'm in television right, I'm a television producer. When
51:55
Speaker 4: I retire, whenever that might be, I want to be
51:58
Speaker 4: a baby nurse, like I just want to cuddle babies.
52:00
Speaker 4: I love it. My nine month old does not sleep.
52:04
Speaker 4: I never sleep it sucks, but at the same time,
52:07
Speaker 4: like I can't be mad. I'm like, it's so short lived.
52:09
Speaker 4: I just want to hold him all the time.
52:11
Speaker 3: It is so short Also, like I look at her
52:14
Speaker 3: every day and I like her little gummy smile and
52:16
Speaker 3: like she's so easy to make laugh hysterically. And I'm like,
52:20
Speaker 3: one day she's going to be the cutest that she's
52:22
Speaker 3: ever going to be, and then she's going to turn
52:24
Speaker 3: like nine, and she's not gonna be like she's gonna
52:27
Speaker 3: reach like peek cute, you know, No, No.
52:30
Speaker 4: They're always they're always cute. My nine year old is
52:33
Speaker 4: a doll.
52:34
Speaker 2: I know it went. It went from like cute in
52:36
Speaker 2: a baby doll way to like my oldest is my
52:38
Speaker 2: best friend. Yeah, Like my eleven year old is like,
52:42
Speaker 2: what's what's your order? I have a girl boy boy
52:46
Speaker 2: girl boy boy.
52:49
Speaker 4: And so oh so three girls three boys?
52:52
Speaker 2: No no, no girl boy boys. So I have two
52:54
Speaker 2: girls for boys.
52:55
Speaker 4: Oh okay, okay, same, You're going in mine is boy
53:01
Speaker 4: girl girl boy boy boy.
53:03
Speaker 3: Oh wow?
53:04
Speaker 2: Oh wow? So you also have four boys? Yeah yeah, same, okay.
53:11
Speaker 2: I I love it. I think it's the perfect spread
53:15
Speaker 2: because the girls can be emotionally very difficult. Yes, and
53:19
Speaker 2: the boys are always on an even keel, but there's
53:22
Speaker 2: so much more physical violence with them that I think
53:27
Speaker 2: it evens out, like the emotional of the two and
53:29
Speaker 2: the physical violence of the four.
53:32
Speaker 4: It's I took my girls from manicure petticures yesterday because
53:38
Speaker 4: we're heading to the Hamptons this weekend. And like one
53:41
Speaker 4: of my daughter's got for her birthday like a gift cards.
53:43
Speaker 4: I'm like, okay, let's just like have a rendezvoo. I said,
53:45
Speaker 4: if I had to have four girls here for manny petties,
53:48
Speaker 4: like I'd lose my mind, you know, like not to
53:51
Speaker 4: say that the boys are cheaper, because the boys are
53:52
Speaker 4: definitely more expensive. Two of them are playing ice hockey
53:55
Speaker 4: and like they're in flag football and like all this
53:58
Speaker 4: different stuff. And even though we in a sports center,
54:01
Speaker 4: we're still paying out for every sport. My girls play tennis,
54:04
Speaker 4: I don't have tennis. My boys play hockey. We don't
54:06
Speaker 4: have hockey. So I'm like to my husband, can we
54:07
Speaker 4: capitalize on the sports we do play here? Because this
54:11
Speaker 4: is ridiculous, but they're so they're expensive. But like the girls,
54:16
Speaker 4: like you know, they they want like the fancy clothes.
54:19
Speaker 4: Like they're not asking for it, but they like that stuff,
54:22
Speaker 4: you know, And it's fun for me to be like, hey, girls,
54:26
Speaker 4: do you want to take a trip to Italy? I
54:28
Speaker 4: took my girls to Italy? Like if I had to
54:30
Speaker 4: take four girls to Italy, like that would be very expensive.
54:34
Speaker 4: So I'm kind of like, you know where I love
54:38
Speaker 4: big families, it's expensive, right. Like my husband we're married
54:42
Speaker 4: ten years in September, and he's like, I want to
54:45
Speaker 4: go to Alaska. And I was like why and he's like,
54:48
Speaker 4: they have like a Disney cruise. I'm not like a
54:49
Speaker 4: Disney person, but whatever. So he's like, they have this
54:52
Speaker 4: Disney cruise and we can go to Juneo and this.
54:54
Speaker 6: And I was like, you know how expensive it's going
54:56
Speaker 6: to be for eight people to go to Alaska? And
54:59
Speaker 6: I'm gonna be old, like I don't know if I
55:01
Speaker 6: want to.
55:01
Speaker 2: I don't even think you can go on a cruise
55:03
Speaker 2: with that many children. I've looked into it before.
55:06
Speaker 4: Because how do you do it? You need like four
55:08
Speaker 4: state rooms.
55:09
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, I was just out of curiosity because I
55:11
Speaker 2: was getting chased by a lot of ads. But then
55:14
Speaker 2: I watched the Poop Cruise Netflix yes, you never want
55:19
Speaker 2: to go on a cruise? That was like that was
55:21
Speaker 2: the anti advertisement for cruises. Oh that looks terrible.
55:25
Speaker 3: Now I just watched the Tyson Submissible documentary and I
55:28
Speaker 3: never want to go on a cruise, did you?
55:31
Speaker 2: So here's my question about that, and then I think
55:33
Speaker 2: we should wrap. Is it like interesting enough to last
55:38
Speaker 2: you the whole time?
55:39
Speaker 3: Yeah?
55:41
Speaker 4: What is it called?
55:41
Speaker 3: Because it's so dumb? They're so dumb.
55:44
Speaker 4: Wait, what is this called?
55:46
Speaker 3: You know the submarine that blew up?
55:48
Speaker 6: Oh?
55:48
Speaker 3: Yeah, they made a Netflix documentary about it. It's stick
55:52
Speaker 3: to watch it right now.
55:54
Speaker 2: I think I actually am going to go watch it.
55:57
Speaker 3: It's incredible because they're so dumb. It's like free single
56:00
Speaker 3: red flag that could have come up came up.
56:03
Speaker 4: You know.
56:04
Speaker 3: Boeing wrote last is saying this is absolutely not safe.
56:08
Speaker 3: This is gonna blow up, and like.
56:11
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna watch it. Here, I'm gonna I'm gonna
56:14
Speaker 2: throw out a question and then you tell me if
56:18
Speaker 2: it is answered in the documentary, and if it is.
56:20
Speaker 2: If it is, then don't tell me. But why why
56:23
Speaker 2: is Boeing involved? Do we get an answer? Why Boeing
56:26
Speaker 2: has an opinion?
56:27
Speaker 3: Yeah?
56:27
Speaker 2: Okay, fine, then I'm just gonna I'll find out when
56:29
Speaker 2: I watch it. Okay, with that, I'm gonna go watch
56:33
Speaker 2: this documentary because I'm super into it. Thank you so
56:38
Speaker 2: much for having for coming on, Daniel. This was so
56:40
Speaker 2: fun and we didn't get into any of my work
56:42
Speaker 2: questions like how do you becoming? I didn't get into
56:46
Speaker 2: any of that, and I was curious and now I
56:51
Speaker 2: and now I haven't found out the answer until.
56:53
Speaker 4: Next time, until next time I write you a text
56:56
Speaker 4: about it.
56:57
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, all right, Well I'll be watching the documentary,
57:00
Speaker 2: so thank you all for listening. Don't forget to subscribe
57:04
Speaker 2: and five stars and leave us a review, but only
57:07
Speaker 2: if you like us and subscribe to the substack as well.
57:10
Speaker 2: Until next week. I'm Bethany Mandel.
57:13
Speaker 3: I'm car Kennedy.
57:14
Speaker 5: Saddle Up Ricochet, Join the conversation