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EP 81 Shifting Negative Thoughts with Mrs. Potato Head & Kelli Portman · iRefresh Podcast

• 0:00
  Spending time in the Word is just crucial. You have to be very intentional about making a choice to renew your mind. There are times, Cheryl, where we need to set boundaries and relationships may have to be pruned out of our lives.
• 0:16
  Welcome to iRefresh, where we talk about the power of prayer in God's Word. We have a special episode with a dear friend of mine, Kelly Portman. Welcome. Thank you for having me. We go back quite a few years from our days at college at Oral Roberts University. And we worked on an alumni group for a while with the RA program. But then you were involved with me at iRefresh at the very beginning. Yes, those are such treasured memories. The Lord gave you a vision, and it is awesome to see what has happened.
• 0:43
  And it's been a blessing. And one of the things I loved early on, you shared an incredible story in our gatherings. Not just a story, but the whole property of identity. You know, that's something that we all have a struggle with. We think we might have confidence, and sometimes we may project on the outside. But internally, we have a problem with identifying who we are.
• 1:06
  when we're not comparing ourselves or looking around and just struggling with who we are. So I wanted you just to come and share with our listeners about that to remind us of who we are in Christ. Yes, Cheryl, I think the enemy is out to get each one of us. John 10.10 says he comes to kill, steal, and destroy. But Christ has come that he might have life and have it more abundantly.
• 1:30
  And so I know that every person struggles with identity. It doesn't matter if you're five years old or you're 85. That thief of comparison is always a challenge. And God made us so that I truly believe there's a God-shaped hole in our hearts that only he can fill. Don't you find that that's true? That's so true.
• 1:51
  I know that in my life there have been times that I have been absolutely robbed of experiences because I've either been jealous of someone. I don't think I meet up. I'm not capable, whatever it might be.
• 2:08
  always fall short or something. Yes, yes. I agree. So I began to dive into scripture and find scriptures that tell me, who am I in Christ? Because we need to know whose we are. Once we've accepted the Lord as our Savior, we need to know that we belong to him. He created us. He has special plans and purposes for each one of us.
• 2:30
  And it takes effort on our part to stay in the word, to stay in prayer, to to remind ourselves because we live in the world, but not of the world. It takes a discipline when you say really helps us in our life because it brings in a confidence we wouldn't have had if we didn't. Even if it's a verse a day is just getting in that so that God has opportunity to speak into our lives and help to redirect some of our thinking.
• 2:53
  I mean, I know I had even recently when I was on a trip, I like I felt what woken up in the morning, the hours of the morning. And it's like the Lord was identifying something in that he was shifting in my thinking. I had wrong thinking. And it was a good experience for me to have the Lord woo me towards how I should see and perceive other people as well. Yes. Because it helps us. Right. It helps us if we have a good, solid understanding of who we are, but also other people.
• 3:22
  Yes, because I think most people are good hearted and are not out to get you. But isn't it true that we could have an interaction and you could have tried to give me a compliment and I could have taken it the other way because of my own insecurity. And so spending time in the word is is just crucial. We feed our body every day. But in order for us to stay strong spiritually, we have to feed our spirit.
• 3:48
  Yes. And that thank God for his word. I want to take us to Galatians 220. It says, I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. This life I now live in the body. I live by faith in the son of God who loved me and gave himself for me.
• 4:10
  And another verse I want to share is 2 Corinthians 5, 17. You're a new creation in him. The old has passed and the new has come. And it takes a while for us to take on that new because it takes some transformation, doesn't it? Oh, it's not overnight. And, you know, even at our age, hallelujah, we're still young at heart. But, you know, it's amazing. Even as we both, you know, when we talk about our kids and trying to help them to be better or whatever, yes.
• 4:38
  It feels like I'm looking in the mirror as I'm trying to correct them when they were younger. I'm like, okay, I need to give preach to myself of how I need to refine this attitude I have as well. So he's always working on us. He is. One of the illustrations, I brought a special character. Yay! Something the Lord gave me was a visual demonstration of what I've done. And so I want to introduce you to...
• 5:06
  Our dear friend, Miss Sweet Potato. There she is. I created her, Miss Sweet Potato. You're special. You're going to have a great life. God has plans and purposes for you.
• 5:18
  So let me tell you a little bit about Miss Sweet Potato. I sent her off to school. And do you know what? She wasn't the first one in her class to read. Oh, no. So she didn't think she was smart. And so for our listeners, what we're doing is Miss Potato Head, is we're putting a little glob.
• 5:38
  of clay because she's been marred a little bit. Yes, now she has something on her brain, a patch, a block, thinking, I'm not a good reader, I'm not going to be good at academic, and the thoughts go on. Yes. And then she goes into band, and do you know what? Uh-oh, what happens? The band teacher has to tell her she doesn't have a good ear for music.
• 6:02
  Oh, it's not her gift. It's not her gift. And we have another mark. We have another mark. All of a sudden, her head is getting full of negative ideas. And even if I, as a creator, try and tell her something, she's got to work through these thoughts, right?
• 6:21
  And then as she gets into the teenage years and begins to see things on social media, she's not measuring up and she doesn't get invited to the party. So now FOMO's happened. Yes. So now we're missing out and now it's getting clouded. So now we're being filtered, actually it's a cluttered filter of bad experiences. That's her new identity. Right, right.
• 6:47
  The Lord brings a good man into her life and she marries Mr. Potato Head. Ah, yes. Yes. Gotta like him. He's so cute! Wonderful season! But do you know Mr. Potato Head, he told her she did look fat in those jeans. No! Yes, so there she has another glob, another bad thinking. And she sends her little, she has a baby, little spuds.
• 7:13
  Little sponge. She sends them off to school. But you know what? Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head work hard, but they don't have the best of everything. So she doesn't feel like she measures up for her children. She's not doing enough of them. Enough for them. She can't give them the best. It's never enough. Yes.
• 7:31
  So it goes on and on and on. She finally decides, you know what? I'm a good church-going lady. I'm going to try and cover up all these things. Okay, so we put a hat over her. She puts her hat on. Okay. And that works for a little bit. But then the day comes when Mr. Potato gets frustrated and they have an argument and off flies the hat.
• 7:54
  And then a friend tells her, you know what? You are a creature in Christ. God created you. Oh, Miss Kelly created you. And then a friend tells her, you are a special creation. Don't you remember? You were created with a specific purpose. Exactly. And these things.
• 8:13
  These bad thoughts start to come off. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. And that thought falls off. You were chosen from the beginning. I know the plans and purposes that I have for your life. And being reminded day after day of who she is, who she is, and that good things are ahead for her. That there is a plan for her life. But it takes her...
• 8:42
  getting in and being determined to remove those things. And it doesn't happen all at once. And you know, I'll have to say, there's times when you feel like you've conquered something, but then somebody comes out and they, and we might do it to ourself, our self-talk sticks another piece of glob right back over in our brain. Yes.
• 9:00
  And I think, you know, part of it when you've talked about the importance of the word is because the word helps to keep this stuff off. Yes. Because I believe that, too, if we don't do that or if the relationships that are around us, sometimes they're good. And sometimes we have to remove ourselves from those relationships because they're speaking life or death to us or we're doing that to them. Yes.
• 9:22
  Like, how are we being life-giving to our friends and our family? And I think we all have that back and forth, that we're constantly going back and forth. And we need to constantly be renewed in the word, like you're declaring what you've been sharing are scriptures of who we are in Christ. Yes. You are right. It is a constant battle. It's a battlefield of the mind. Joyce Myers has a great book on that.
• 9:45
  And we have to be bold enough with our friends to encourage them. There are times, you talked about this, there are times, Cheryl, where we need to set boundaries. And relationships may have to be pruned out of our lives. They're not healthy ones. And we have to make that choice. And oftentimes you may have to see a counselor or professional help to make those decisions.
• 10:06
  But you have to be very intentional about making a choice to renew your mind. And I think that's really good, too. And let me ask you, when you're saying sometimes we have to maybe if it's a friend, maybe we don't hang out with them quite as often so that we can be strong. But what if it's a family member?
• 10:26
  Now go ahead, tell me, what are we going to do when the family member continually is, some family, maybe a spouse is not saved, and they don't understand that. Right. How is it that we can go to the Lord and help us to protect our mind?
• 10:44
  Right. I think, Cheryl, that's a great point because that is often the case is those relationships closest to us. And so I think that it is crucial, number one, that you're praying for that person. Yes. And if that person has a lot of hurts in their life, I once heard a pastor say, wounded animals don't act right and neither do wounded humans.
• 11:06
  And I think that is so true. We need to understand where that person is coming from, what hurts, what issues they may have, and pray for them. But I think there are situations in our life where we actually, you know, until there is a healthier situation,
• 11:23
  individual there that we can be with, we need to break those relationships, which is very, very hard because you hate to see that. But I think it's so, so important who we surround ourselves with. I wanted to read Romans 12 too. This is about renewing your mind. It says, do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
• 11:48
  And so one of the ways that I've done this, and I know you have too, is... I'm going to renew her mind right now. Yes, let's renew her mind. This potato head is now clogged free. She is free. I've got a good filter of good thinking. I love it. Yes. One of the things we think is we're not special. And so I wrote that on this side of the card, whatever it is that you struggle with.
• 12:12
  I think it's important just list it out. And then on the other side of the card, find scriptures, find the truth. Okay. The truth will set you free. So you're not special. Well, did you know you're made in the image of God? Genesis 127 reminds us that you are made in the image of God. God has plans and purposes. I mean, the creator of the universe made you. Yes.
• 12:37
  He has put creation within you to be creative, to do all that he has called you to do. It's amazing that we're made in his image. And the other verses, Psalm 139, 13 through 15. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. God knit you together in your mother's womb. And I think so often it's easy to read those verses, but not ponder that.
• 13:02
  Right. And so in my devotion, I was pondering what does fearfully, what does wonderfully make take the time to really slow down and think, what does this mean? He took time to go, okay, Cheryl, I'm going to give her blue eyes. I want to have blonde hair.
• 13:18
  I want her to have a confidence and a gift so that she knows that my love can flow through her and she can give it out. He put those things in her. And Cheryl has taken the time to be disciplined enough to develop that. And I love that gifting in you. That's awesome.
• 13:36
  That's good. One of the things that we all deal with, especially now with social media, is we're left out. Not that we didn't know in the 80s when we were being left out, but we really know now. Isn't that true? Yeah, it's right in your face. Yes, it is. First Peter 2.9 says, but you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people of...
• 13:57
  I love that verse. That's good. And we are all sinners. And that's the hardest thing. Sometimes it's, we know that God forgives us, but do we forgive ourselves?
• 14:16
  Now, see, it's easier to ask God to forgive us because he's all-knowing and all-powerful, and he has the capacity. But I think our greatest struggle is being able to say, I forgive myself. Yes. And when we can do that by faith, I believe that's when you begin to have that transformation. Yes.
• 14:36
  Again, it's something that you almost sometimes have to speak out and start walking in, and then you start believing sometimes. That's good. But 1 John 1, 9, if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. That's good.
• 14:54
  Sometimes we believe the lie of no future. But Ephesians 2.10 says, For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared for us beforehand that we should walk in them. Wow. I mean, he put these things in us for plans and a purpose. This lie, I'm just a...
• 15:16
  And all of us have said this at some point. I'm just, sometimes as a mother, I'm just a maid. That's not true. I know he has plans. I'm a cook too. My specialty is laundry.
• 15:33
  but I believe, and I know you do this. I believe that God has different people in different places for a specific time and purpose. And you might think I'm just a chauffeur. I am just, I clean rooms at a hotel. I, whatever it is, but God will put people in your path that you can encourage, that you can lift up, that you can speak a word of life into. Amen. And don't underestimate, uh,
• 16:02
  your position because God knows who you are and where, where he needs you at that time. And you never know. There are incredible stories. And I love how God works through what we would think in an earthly sense is the low or the weak.
• 16:19
  Right? Yes, he does. He does. That's his specialty. Jeremiah 29, 11 says, For I know the plans I have for you. And then Romans 8, 28. We know that for those who love God, all things work together for good. For those who are called according to his purpose. And so...
• 16:39
  Sherilyn, I remember years ago, and this was after college, but we started working out. Do you remember that? Oh, yes, you did. Yes. Well, what did we get up? 545 or something?
• 16:49
  It was incredibly early. It was either 5 o'clock or 6 o'clock, probably 6 o'clock workout. Yes. So we would meet at the gym at 6 o'clock. And because you were probably already fit, but I really did need to transform my body. But I got to thinking about that. That is not something that we did one time, and I expected to transformation. Right. Right? We had to be consistent in meeting there and working those muscles. Right? You're right. God bless the time.
• 17:19
  Love Tom. Yeah. Very helpful. Yes. But we had to be consistent in getting that muscle trained. And it took consistency with that. And it's going to take that as we're renewing our minds. We're going to have to read scripture. We're going to have to speak. You're going to have to look in the mirror or put post-it notes up on the mirror if that's what it takes. And also during that time when we were working out, it wasn't just training that muscle is what I was putting in.
• 17:48
  And it is so easy. Did you notice that it doesn't take much effort at all to get up and get on social media or watch the news? Like that doesn't take much effort, does it? And it goes by so fast. There goes like a half hour or an hour on social media. You're totally right. But if we need to take time, when we were working out, I started really watching what I was putting into my body. And we need to do that for our minds and our spirits.
• 18:16
  We need to make sure that the word of God is going in, that we have good relationships that are speaking life into us and that we're spending that time just listening. I feel like we go at such a fast pace now. We don't allow ourselves quiet time to just listen.
• 18:34
  It's true, which makes it hard to ponder the Word of God if we're on the go. You read in the morning, and I'm like, okay, what did I just read? I would rather read one scripture and it take root, because that way I meditate and bring it back to my remembrance throughout the day. And the Lord's so good, the Holy Spirit brings it to our remembrance.
• 18:52
  And I know that when we do that, it's amazing how often I did that even this week. Whatever I was reading that morning, later that evening, I got an opportunity to pray with some people that had gone through some hardship. And that was where I started for them. It was that point of what I read in the morning. And I thought, I think this is something that could be an encouragement to them. So sometimes it's not even just for ourselves.
• 19:15
  But it's also preparation when we go out into our day is how can that be a blessing to other people that we can spread that love of Christ in that way and encourage each other to inspire each other to be in the Word? Because you're right. When you go back to the workouts, if we stop doing the workout, just like stop reading the Word for a short period of time, it's amazing how fast we lose the muscle.
• 19:37
  Oh, so quickly. Yes. And so we have to be in the word or we lose the power and the potency of being renewed in our mind. Right. And I know people are on the go. A lot of women are working full time and that can be difficult. But...
• 19:55
  I'm sure you have creative ideas, either getting the word on a CD or a podcast, obviously listening to I'm a fresh dot net. I love that. But getting that word, even if you're just listening, if you don't, if you don't take time in the morning to read it, at least listen to it when you're on the go.
• 20:14
  Yes, you know, there's a lot of different small devotionals, too, that you can even listen to the audio. And that way, at least you're getting your mind in focused with the word. So you've given us so many great scriptures for us to even go to and write them down. And we'll be putting those on show notes at iRefresh.net so that we can take those things, take our mind captive. Yes.
• 20:37
  And begin to exchange the bad thinking with just the way what you did here is renewing and taking off the old thoughts. Yes. One of the things that I was just reminded of, as I was driving over here, I was thinking, you know, some of us have believed for so long the lies of Satan that they've become truth to you. Mm-hmm.
• 20:58
  So this is going to be something that's going to take some effort. Maybe you would want to have an accountability partner. And God can work through this. I don't want you to give up just because, oh, that came right back at you. You're going to see victories, but it may take time and you can do it. You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. And it is worth it for the long run. When you think this is where I want to be in a year, in five years, it's going to be
• 21:26
  taking the time to transform your mind and your spirit so that you can walk in that.
• 21:32
  That's so good. Thank you, Kelly, for sharing. Really a powerful message. And I hope that it will really encourage you to really take hold of the things you've heard. I would suggest you hear it a few times. Share it with your friends because of that accountability friend to help you. Like, what did you, what's your takeaway? What are our scriptures that we can, even if we go walking and doing exercising, what is something that we can stand on so that we can actually watch a change in our thinking and how our thinking comes out in what we say? Yes.
• 21:59
  Such a powerful word, so thank you so much. My pleasure.