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Understanding and Dealing with the Subtle Vital Interchange in Human Relationships · Sri Aurobindo Studies

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  We undergo changes of mood, feelings, responses, and do not
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  generally try to understand how these things come about, their
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  source and impact upon our own state of being.
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  In some cases, we actually associate cause and effect with
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  an interaction with another individual, such as when we
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  exclaim that we are avoiding meeting a particular person
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  because it is a draining experience.
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  This rare recognition is, however, a sign of the deeper
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  interactions that are taking place constantly between people.
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  We do not tend to recognize that we are subtly influenced in our
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  vital being by the vibrational pattern of the individuals we
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  are interacting with, such that we may suddenly have an urge to
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  eat, or experience a form of trepidation or inner discomfort,
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  or feel like taking a nap. People who associate with
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  individuals who use certain forms of recreational drugs
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  frequently describe what they call a contact high, where they
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  are not themselves using those drugs, but the experience of the
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  individual they are in contact with is communicating the
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  euphoric sensation to them vicariously.
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  Similarly, we sometimes feel a sense of depression looming
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  around us when we interact with someone who is deeply depressed.
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  On the other side, we can interact with people who are
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  intensely focused on a mental project or a spiritual state of
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  being and feel suddenly like we either are concentrated in our
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  being or we feel a state of profound peace, goodwill,
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  aspiration, or consecration associated with picking up the
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  vibration of an individual or individuals who are themselves
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  in that state of being. Most of this takes place
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  subconsciously, so we do not directly tend to associate our
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  internal sense with the external relationship that is actually
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  creating the vital vibratory pattern that we associate with
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  that state. The spiritual seeker who
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  recognizes the reality of this type of vital interchange has
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  several ways to deal with it. Traditionally, the individual is
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  asked to isolate himself from this type of vital interaction
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  to be able to focus on his spiritual development if one
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  remains active in the world. However, this is not an ideal or
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  even a truly workable solution for such individuals.
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  The increased awareness of these subtle interactions is a first
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  step to be attained thereafter. He can exercise various forms of
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  vital protection through strengthening of the aura or
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  through mental or spiritual control that recognizes the
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  force coming in but consciously rejects it and its influence,
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  Sri Aurobindo observes, Quote No, people are not conscious of
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  these things. Only a few are.
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  The vital exchange is there, but they are not aware of it because
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  they live in the external mind, physical, and these things go on
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  behind. Even if they feel more energetic
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  after an interchange, or depressed, or tired, they would
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  not attribute it to the talk or contact, because the interchange
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  is unconscious, their external mind in which they live not
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  being aware of it. I don't suppose people are at
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  all aware of this occult commerce.
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  Some, like Dodet, may observe the expenditure or throwing out
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  of forces, but not the pulling or the effect on others.
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  The idea of mental interchange is familiar, though only of the
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  superficial kind, not the silent action of mind on mind which is
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  always going on. But the vital impacts are known
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  only to a few occultists. If one becomes very conscious,
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  one can become aware of the forces acting in and from all
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  around, EG forces of joy or depression or anger.
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  End Quote Reference Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, The
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  Hidden Forces of Life, Chapter One, Life Through the Eyes of
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  the Yogin, pages 17 to 18.