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Transcript

#0148_ STORY INSPIRE: The Lodge From Hell: A Wild Story · INSPIRE STORY

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show. What's
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: going on with Brendan Schaub and Bobby Lee? What's happening?
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: Well, I saw Bobby and Kalilah went on.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: H3H3.
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: What's going on?
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: Looks like there's some accusations.
• 0:25
  Speaker 3: What's happening? What's the 411?
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: 411.
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: What's the deal?
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: They're in a fight. They're in a feud right now.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: Some accusations are being thrown at Brendan.
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: Who done it? Who said what? Who, what, why, when, where?
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: What's going on?
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: Beef!
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: The podcast community is flipped upside down right now over.
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: It's fucking wild. But I want to get some straight answers.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: How can I do my job? How can I continue
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: to do my job without getting to the bottom?
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: Is this why they're overturning Roe v.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: Wade? Because of Kalilah, Annie Letterman, Brandon Schaub, Bobby Lee,
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Roe v. Wade. What's going on? Amy Coney Barrett Chief
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: Justice John Roberts, Bobby Lee, Brandon Schaub, Kalilah, Joe Biden,
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: the economy, Jews, Catholics, Protestants, Muslims, Bobby Lee, H3H3.
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: Can you get some fucking answers?
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: It's your job.
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: People on the internet are saying.
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: He's a bully.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: I think he's made inappropriate passes at women. I mean,
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: to be specific here on the pod would feel unfair.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: What constitutes a woman? Really?
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: No, I mean, it's a real question.
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: In this case, a lady with a pussy and titties.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: Well, I don't want you to start being vulgar. I
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: don't think that's your job to start being vulgar right now.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: We're talking about a serious issue. I want you to
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: really kind of like, you know, you're at work. Half
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: the time with you, you know, you forget you're at work.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: You can't start throwing out vulgarities. This isn't a blue show.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: We don't work blue here.
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: I apologize.
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: This is a news show, and the news.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: I'm covering is Bobby Lee, Brandon Schaub, Annie Letterman, Kalilah,
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Esther Bavitsky, Roe v. Wade.
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: What's going on?
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: I have a clip here, a viral clip here, of
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: Bobby Lee exposing Brendan Schaub and his goons for the
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: bullies they are, according to this person.
• 2:58
  Speaker 4: And his goons?
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: Wait, Brendan Schaub has goons?
• 3:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: There are goons?
• 3:03
  Speaker 4: I think.
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: There are goons involved? I'm... Let me tell you right now, folks.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: I just went to the rainforest, to this hotel, which
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: I'm really... I mean, you know, I'm not going to, listen,
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to really let people know what the problem,
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: and I mean plural, problems are here. There are many.
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: And it's unfortunate because I spent a lot of money
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: for this. And I'm unhappy.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: And I'm well within my rights to be unhappy. And
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: there are indigenous tribes all over this area. It's the
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: world's oldest rainforest. It's 180 million years old. And you
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: see them. You see these people. And I'm running up
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: to them. and going, what the fuck is going on
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: with Bobby Lee and Kalilah? And they're pretending they don't know.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: They don't speak English. And I'm going, do you understand
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: what's happening with Annie Letterman? And I don't know what
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: they're doing. Gathering fruit. It's not my business, but I've
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: been spending all of my time here trying to tell
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: them about this thing, and I don't even know what
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: it is. I feel so disconnected. So what's going on again?
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: There are goons.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: I think we should just.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: Brandon Schaub's got a pirate ship of goons, and they're
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: going after Bobby Lee.
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: Is it because he's Korean? Is he Korean?
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: I don't think it's a race thing, but he is Korean, yeah.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: Right, well, I was right about that. See, I do
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: know some things. But I feel so out of everything.
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: I don't feel included anymore. I'm like on the outside.
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: I'm a victim of my own success. It's very hard
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: to stay connected to the issues of the day when
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: I'm out here in the rainforest trying to lead these
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: people to Christ. Now, play this clip with... of Bobby Lee.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: I cannot cover this, folks. Many people don't want me
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: to cover it. Right? Right. People don't want me to
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: cover it. But I have to cover it because it's
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: the news. This is big news.
• 5:54
  Speaker 5: My point is that now my fear is the results
• 5:59
  Speaker 5: of whatever this is now going to be.
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: There's no results because... There is.
• 6:03
  Speaker 4: There is a result.
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: No, there isn't.
• 6:05
  Speaker 6: I can call Schaub right now, and we could be like,
• 6:07
  Speaker 6: all is squared away and everything is fine because we've
• 6:09
  Speaker 6: already talked about it. The promise was that he would
• 6:12
  Speaker 6: never talk about it again, and the next day he
• 6:14
  Speaker 6: went on Flagrant 2 and then talked about it, even
• 6:16
  Speaker 6: though it was in a complimentary way.
• 6:18
  Speaker 5: Yeah, in a complimentary way.
• 6:20
  Speaker 6: I don't feel like we've said anything bad about him either.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: The point is.
• 6:23
  Speaker 6: Was there a text alluding to possibly suing people?
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: Yes, there was.
• 6:30
  Speaker 6: Did it freak me out? And did it make me think, oh, shit,
• 6:33
  Speaker 6: like such a small thing to sue over. But was
• 6:37
  Speaker 6: there a lot of misunderstanding from his team and us?
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: But we talked it through. But the truth is the truth.
• 6:45
  Speaker 6: And, you know, it's all squared away.
• 6:47
  Speaker 7: So you guys are just going to get this clear.
• 6:50
  Speaker 7: So you guys were talking about there was this comedian
• 6:52
  Speaker 7: that people assumed was him.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 6:55
  Speaker 7: That was trying to pick up all you girls, kind.
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: Of a sleaze, whatever.
• 6:58
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 6:59
  Speaker 7: So he calls you and says, Bobby. Get your woman
• 7:05
  Speaker 7: in line? I mean, what kind of fucking animal does that?
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: That's fucked up. Why didn't he call you?
• 7:09
  Speaker 7: He has your number, right, I would assume.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: It's your podcast. It's your fucking podcast. Who the fuck?
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: What the fuck is that shit?
• 7:16
  Speaker 5: It was not just him.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: There was a whole barrage. Don't say the name. I'm
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: not going to. But it was a phone.
• 7:23
  Speaker 5: Call with other podcasters. That's some bullshit.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: They flogged you, bro. Not flogged me.
• 7:29
  Speaker 5: They threatened my career. They called me a coward, a pussy.
• 7:35
  Speaker 5: You've always been a pussy.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry. That's unacceptable.
• 7:38
  Speaker 5: And they said they would expose me. They said that
• 7:42
  Speaker 5: all these things. And I was in Oklahoma shooting a show.
• 7:48
  Speaker 5: And I was at dinner. And I was by myself.
• 7:50
  Speaker 5: And it was very traumatic for me. And it was
• 7:54
  Speaker 5: based on whatever they did on the live. Now imagine
• 7:58
  Speaker 5: now what's going to happen now. with know this.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: It's good you said that.
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: I think it's good that you're saying that.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: Who are they?
• 8:04
  Speaker 3: Who are they? This is my question. He said it's
• 8:09
  Speaker 3: a bunch of goons.
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: Well, I think it's implied, right? They don't name them specifically,
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: but it's implied the people he kind of hangs out
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: with in the podcast world.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: Well, man, did I miss this scandal. I missed it.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: I feel bad. Brendan has always been very nice to me.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: My experiences with him are overwhelmingly positive. I should note,
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: and I don't think this will be a surprise to anyone,
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: and it won't be a surprise to Brendan.
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: Brendan is not the heir to Richard Pryor.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: He's not. I don't know that there is an air
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: to Pryor. Maybe Chappelle. But it's not Brendan, right? Is
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: that fair? Can I say that without ruffling feathers? And
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: it doesn't mean that Brendan isn't funny on that show, right?
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: He's good on the show. People like him. I've never
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: seen his stand up. He's a very controversial figure. And
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: I just believe that there's so much drama and there's
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: not enough love going around.
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: Isn't that the way you feel?
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: Because it's fair to say that Brendan is new at stand-up.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: He's very new.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: Very new, yeah.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: And it takes years and years to become a good stand-up.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: And sometimes it doesn't happen. Sometimes it doesn't happen. Sometimes
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: the diet doesn't work. A lot of people die fat.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: You see, the things we want aren't always the things
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: we get. I love a T. Nobody pronounces a T.
• 10:12
  Speaker 4: Get.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: Why don't we do that? Now, Brendan may go on
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: to be the greatest comedian that has ever lived. That
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: is a possibility. I do not know that. But I
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: don't know that it's fair to say that he's got
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: a goon squad running around and intimidating people. But maybe
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: he does. But I don't know that that's the case.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: But when Bobby Lee says, they, the people and It's ominous.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: But there could be. I don't know. It's not my
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: experience with him. Brendan has been overwhelmingly nice to me.
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: He's never made an inappropriate pass at me. And that
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: shows tremendous amount of restraint on his part. I have
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: missed this scandal completely. I spend most of my time
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: with venture capitalists, entrepreneurs, philanthropists. I don't spend a lot
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: of time with comedians because they're stupid and poor. That's
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: the only reason I don't spend time with them, because
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: they are dumb and they don't have means, which makes
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: it very tough. And Brendan's rich, I guess. He is.
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: He seems rich.
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: Seems to have money.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: And Bobby's kind of rich, too. But I don't spend
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: time with any of these people because I don't really
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: want to.
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: And it's done a knock on them. They're colleagues, right?
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm. I've never done Tiger Belly. I've been asked a
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: few times. We had to reschedule. I just, I don't
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: care about doing other people's shows anymore. I just want
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: to do my own. I just hope everyone finds a
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: pathway to love. Because it's not overrated. It isn't. Find
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: a pathway to love, god damn it. What's life really about?
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: Fighting over this silliness, this craziness? Who tried to throw
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: whose wife into the car? It's not a big deal.
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: Why do we got to keep going over this? People
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: are so fast and loose with the truth. So that's
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: my statement.
• 12:30
  Speaker 3: I'm agnostic, but I have to cover it.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: It's the news.
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: The same way I have to cover Roe v.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: Wade.
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: I'm unaffected by Roe v.
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: Wade.
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: I haven't had an abortion in a year. But I
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: gotta cover it.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: Because, you know, this country's headed towards.
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: A real crazy Christian theocracy. Or a, like, San Francisco-style.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: Improv theater. Either one makes me unhappy. I very much
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: want a cold, somewhat emotionless, bureaucratic state.
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: Curtis Yarvin's not wrong about all these things, you know.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: I don't love the idea of just one centralized authority,
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: but his idea that things have to be sort of
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: cold and somewhat bureaucratic and boring, I find, I don't know,
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: better than this current hot, blooded scream fest where all
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: the values are on the table all the time and
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: all the people have to fight. And I just, I
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: hope the best for Brendan and Bobby and Annie and Kalilah.
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: I've never met any of these people. I've never met
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: any of them. I'm too rich.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: Stand-up's a weird thing.
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: And I know that Brendan gets a lot of hate
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: because a lot of people feel that he, when people
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: get into stand up later in life and are not
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: good at it, it bothers people. But he's trying very
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: hard and I'm sure he's gotten better. And listen, again,
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: I think the guy, he's making a buck. He's making
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: more than a buck, right? He's making a little change.
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: Is he going to win the Mark Twain prize for humor?
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: Probably not. But that's okay. Stand-up's just been polluted by
• 14:53
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• 14:56
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• 14:59
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• 17:24
  Speaker 3: Sam Tallent is with us.
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: He's written the foremost book on stand-up. What do you
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: think about this phenomenon we have where MMA people, or
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: whoever they happen to be, are doing comedy and people
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: are upset about it? They're angry.
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: I stand with Brendan. I stand with the guy who
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: could do the most physical damage to me, and that's
• 17:52
  Speaker 4: Brendan in this case. I fear him, not because of
• 17:55
  Speaker 4: any allegations, just how good he is with his hands
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: and his feet. So, yeah, Brendan, I'm with you, brother.
• 18:02
  Speaker 3: I kind of like him.
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: Me too.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I do.
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: Here's the thing. I'm supposed to hate him, which makes
• 18:10
  Speaker 3: me like him.
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: Mm-hmm.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Right?
• 18:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah, totally.
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: I mean, he's always been a gentleman to me. Mm-hmm. Truly.
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: He's always been lovely to me. You know, and I
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: think that just to be diplomatic about it, you know,
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: when it gets to the men, women stuff and the
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: boys and the girls and the parking lots and the
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: cars and that.
• 18:47
  Speaker 4: Who owns a pickup truck? Who doesn't own a pickup truck?
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, who's going where and who goosed me in the hall?
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: I try not to get involved. It's none of my business.
• 18:58
  Speaker 4: Well, you're above it. You don't need it.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: Well, I do need a goosing. It's actually untrue. I'm
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: not above a goosing and I need a goosing. And
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say this. If Brendan Schaub threw me
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: against the wall at the Comedy Store and started to
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: make out with me, I'd just shut up about it.
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't run my mouth all over town. And I'm
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: not saying he did that to anyone. I don't even
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: think that's being alleged. But I'm saying that if Brendan
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: Schaub raped me, I mean violently, if Brendan grabbed me
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: and raped to the point where I was worried about
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: my own innards... If he raped me, I mean, took
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: my head, and I mean, I've bitten a pillow before,
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: and that's a shame. to no one but I mean
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: biting it where it's permanently damaged saliva flowing out of
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: my mouth in an uncomfortable way I could smell the
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: blood if he destroyed my asshole to the point where
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: I couldn't shit for weeks or shit too much, whatever
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: the problem was. If Brendan fucked me to the point
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: where I had to see a doctor and the doctor's
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: first response.
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: Was, what happened to you?
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: If my bedroom looked like the first 48 with blood
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: and shit all over, if my bedroom looked like a
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: murder scene, and again, if it was non-consensual, I would
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: keep my mouth shut. Because I want the focus to
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: be on the work. I want the focus to be
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: on the work. I don't want people looking at me
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: and going, oh, that's the comic, Brendan anally raped. What?
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: I want the focus to be on the work.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: Now, I just think, I don't know, but this mention
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: of goons and they and them and they're coming and.
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: People, I don't know. I like Bobby too.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: I mean, you know. I had dinner with him I
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: didn't love when I moved to Austin and he was like,
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: you owe the comedy store so much. Why would you
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: turn your back on LA? I'm like, what are you
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: talking about? The only reason I got passers is because
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: Joe Rogan ordered them to pass me. That's the way
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: things work. I didn't develop at the fucking comedy store.
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: I don't care what happens to the comedy store. I
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: don't care what happens to the comedy seller. Yes, they're
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: great places to work. They're great institutions. And I have
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: friends that work there, and I work at the store.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: And I'm very happy that I'm able to work at
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: the store. It's a big moment in my career to
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: get passed at the comedy store. But make no mistake,
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: the reason I got passed was because Joe Rogan made
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: a phone call. So I don't romanticize this. So I
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: had a dinner with Bobby, and I didn't love that. Me, Spade,
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: and Bobby had a dinner, and Bobby was kind of like,
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: don't you feel like you got inducted into the mafia,
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: and now you're like turning your back on the mafia?
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, what are you even saying with your mouth?
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: I didn't love, I mean, me and him are not friendly,
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: but I mean, we're friends-ish. I see him, he's funny,
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: he's a colleague, I respect him. What, Sam? What are
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: you pointing out? Is it an animal?
• 22:35
  Speaker 4: It was one of those pendulums.
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they're all over now, these fat little rats.
• 22:42
  Speaker 4: Ben was telling me a fun story about Bobby Lee.
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: What about it, Ben? Did he rape you?
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: No.
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: No, I was just mentioning offhand to Sam that I
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: believe he shows his asshole on stage, I've heard.
• 22:53
  Speaker 4: Yes!
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: That's what you were talking about, right? Sam, not the
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: other thing?
• 22:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah. That's right.
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: And that's fun! Good for him!
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm. I just don't understand the beef and the drama
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: and the anger and the hatred. All I would like
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: is love, pathways to love, and healing. That's all I
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: want for everyone involved. But I don't care about any
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: of them. Do you understand what I mean?
• 23:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: Of course.
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: But that's the, isn't that, that's, I feel like the
• 23:25
  Speaker 3: most honest way to put it.
• 23:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: I don't care about any of them.
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: Right. But I wish, I hope they're okay.
• 23:31
  Speaker 4: If you were to say that you're deeply affected by
• 23:33
  Speaker 4: all this.
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: I'm unaffected.
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I'm really unaffected.
• 23:36
  Speaker 4: You're in the rainforest.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: I'm unaffected and I don't care. I'm in a rainforest.
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: It doesn't matter to me. I don't care who did
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: what to whom and how. Allegedly.
• 23:49
  Speaker 3: Allegedly.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: Allegedly.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: It doesn't mean anything to me. But everybody's like, what
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: do you think about this? I'm getting calls from the states.
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: What do you think? Weigh in.
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: I just personally know that if I was brutally raped.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: By Brendan Schaap.
• 24:10
  Speaker 4: Even if it wasn't rape, it was just rough stuff.
• 24:13
  Speaker 4: If he was heavy handed.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: Well, I imagine that it would be I believe it
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: would be the type of rape that I consented to.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: You can consent to rape. That's another thing people don't realize. Like,
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: for example, maybe he cornered me and said, hey, do
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: you want to get raped? And I was like, yeah, maybe.
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: And I felt threatened and scared. And then I drove
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: him to my apartment and opened the door and allowed
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: him Or maybe I was so traumatized I instructed or
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: forced him to rape me. Somehow. I don't know. But
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: if I was brutally raped, brutally and viciously raped, I
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: would probably keep my mouth shut because I'd want people
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: to focus on the work.
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: And isn't that the problem in the business?
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: Because people are just living in bubbles of fear. And
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: it's wrong. But I don't care about this or anyone involved.
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: I hope I've covered it to everyone's satisfaction. I'm not
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: friends with anyone involved. I like Annie Letterman. I'm friends
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: with her.
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: But it's what it is here, right? It is what
• 25:33
  Speaker 3: it is. I hope everyone's respected and that's what it is.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Maybe it wouldn't have happened if they all moved
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: to Austin, Texas. How about that? Because everything is love
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: in Austin, Texas. We have a thriving economy of back
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: alley abortions and shootings. But that's my statement. I'm going
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: on the record, fearless, unafraid. I just have to get
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: that out there. Putting it out there. My official statement
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: on this is, I do not care about anyone involved.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: And I really don't know what happened. I don't want
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: to find out. It doesn't matter to me.
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: At all.
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: When I go to the comedy store and I stand
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: in the parking lot and people talk to me, I
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: want to kill myself. I've never had less fun than
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: when I'm doing that in that place. I have zero
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: opinion on this. I really don't care about anything. No
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: shade to the store. It's a great fucking room. But
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: I just don't give a shit. I don't care. And....
• 26:57
  Speaker 3: That's all I'm saying. And I hope that.
• 27:03
  Speaker 3: I hope that people take that and love life.
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: I'm very upset about the experience that I'm having right now.
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: At the end of my stay in Australia, which has
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: been largely positive, the audiences, we brought Sam out here
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: at the end. He did two shows, one really good, one,
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: I mean, fine. The audiences have been largely, they've been
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: really amazing. Aussies are great audiences because comedy is for
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: drunk people. people who don't overthink things so guess what
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: there is a plethora of that here a friend of
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: mine is losing his hair but then he started keeps
• 27:53
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• 28:15
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• 28:19
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• 29:15
  Speaker 1: Oh, this is a ton of our friends are bald
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: and it is really working for them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: I love Raycon earbuds. They are so much cheaper than
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• 30:51
  Speaker 1: They're much better than the alternative. They are inexpensive, and
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: they're better quality. I said to myself, we are in Australia.
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: Let's go see a part of it for a few
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: days before we leave. I did a cursory amount of research,
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: not a lot, And I booked myself, the perpetually ungrateful Benjamin,
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: and the always grateful and lovely Sam Talent, a room,
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: the finest room at the, and I don't want to
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: hurt anyone's business here, but the Silky Oaks Lodge in
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: the Daintree Rainforest. Okay? We got the pavilion suite, which is,
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: I believe, 7,000 a night Australian, maybe 5,000 or 5,300
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: a night American. Okay? Three nights. a $ 15, 000 commitment.
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: The room is nice. We're in the rainforest. It has
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: a private pool.
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: I have no beef with the room. But let's talk
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: a little bit about the staff. I want to mention
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: a woman named Lauren first because I want to say
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: to the people that this will eventually get to the
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: people at the Silky Forest Shed And they will hear this.
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: And they will hear it because someone will tell them.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: It may be tomorrow. It may be in three months.
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: Someone will go, remember the fat guy? Well, he talked
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: about us on this thing.
• 32:24
  Speaker 4: They could also be listening to it right now because
• 32:26
  Speaker 4: their dorms are behind us.
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: Well, good.
• 32:30
  Speaker 3: But they'll be like, remember him?
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: He's got a podcast. And then they're going to go,
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: what's a podcast? They go, well, it's not radio, but
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: on the computer. What's a computer? It's where you get
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: the porn. And I want to single out this woman,
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: who is a lovely woman. She is a waitress. She's
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: coming up here, and she was phenomenal. The only reason
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: I am not burning this place down is because of
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: this woman. who I thought did a phenomenal job serving
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: some of the worst food I've had in my life.
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: Trying to put a happy face. And, you know, bless
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: these people here. They're children of God. But they just,
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: you know, they say it's gourmet and it's fine dining.
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's really, it's a nightmare. There is no
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: reason for the food to be as bad as it is.
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: They don't have any room service. You can't get any
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: room service. You've got to go to the goddamn lodge.
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: The other problem is there are activities in this area
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: that will all kill you. There are jellyfish the size
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: of a penny that can kill you.
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: There are large jellyfish. There are saltwater crocodiles.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: There are sharks. There is the glimpy, glimpy tree that
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: if you brush into it sends shards of glass through
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: your system. There are platypuses. Everything can kill you. And,
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: of course, they all encourage you to do these activities.
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: And as soon as you Google them, you realize how
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: deadly they are. But these people, obviously, the tourism industry
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: will not survive here. The small tourism industry that there is.
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: I mean, people want to snorkel the Great Barrier Reef,
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: which I wanted to do. But I realized it's not
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: worth dying for because the reef is like half bleached anyway.
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: That shit's over.
• 34:19
  Speaker 3: And they give you these stinger suits. We talked about
• 34:22
  Speaker 3: it on the Patreon.
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: Being a bigger person and trying to, like, squeeze into
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: a stinger suit, it's like, just let me die. And
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: these stinger suits are supposed to protect you from the jellyfish,
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: but a lot of them don't even do that. But,
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: you know, because of the tourism industry, they just, you know,
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: people die here and people get hospitalized pretty frequently, but
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: they just kind of ignore it and they go, hey,
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: it is what it is.
• 34:44
  Speaker 3: I get it.
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: I understand. It's like certain, you know, if you go
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: into Chicago and you go, hey, is it safe? They go, yeah,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: it's great.
• 34:52
  Speaker 4: Come on in.
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: Sure, you could be walking down the Miracle Mile and
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: you could get descended upon by a gang of teenagers
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: that beats the living shit out of you in front
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: of your wife, completely emasculates you. But they're not going
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: to tell you that if you call the peninsula. And
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: this ain't the peninsula. But my point is that mum's
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: the word on the deaths here.
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: Can you bring up the article about the zip.
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: Line, Ben?
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I got it right here. So widow sues Daintree
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: zip line company engineers for millions after husband falls to death.
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: This is September of 2021. So the wife of a
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: man who died after plunging from a zip line in
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: far north Queensland has launched a multimillion dollar lawsuit against
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: those she holds responsible. Adelaide father of three, Dean Sanderson, 50,
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: died after the zip line he was attached to failed
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: while high above the Daintree rainforest in October of 2019.
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: His wife, Shannon, who was in a separate harness but
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: launched at the same time, also fell approximately 10 meters
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: at the Jungle Surfing Canopy Tours and survived despite serious injuries.
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: Now, I read another article about this, and the people
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: that were on the zip line line said it was
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: crazy because the zip line went out, and then there
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: was just this sound of the zip line coming back
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: without a person. Oh, God. And then they just heard
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: the wife, and they said it was a blood-curdling scream.
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: She's laying on the floor of the jungle going....
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it says the twang when the zip line came
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: back up made an awful noise. Then there was just
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: silence for what seemed like forever.
• 36:27
  Speaker 3: Well, you know who's responsible for that, truly. If you
• 36:31
  Speaker 3: think about it.
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: Who? Brendan Schaub. What I'm saying here is that it's
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: a deadly environment. We went to one of the most
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: remote locations in the world, Cape Tribulation. Mm-hmm. I mean,
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: as Ben said in one of his rare, lucid, meaningful thoughts,
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: that it was, what did you say, Ben, like a
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: beach from Robinson Crusoe, like the idyllic image of a beach?
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, I said it's a platonic ideal of a beach.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: Like it could only exist inside your own mind, and
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: then you step into it. It's such a surreal experience.
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: It is surreal.
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: It is surreal. You're welcome.
• 37:07
  Speaker 4: It's so beautiful you can't see it.
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: Yes, it is surreal. You're welcome. Now, you also saw
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: one of the little animals you like today, a padamelon? Yes.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: They changed the pronunciation of it. Maybe it's a put
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: a melon.
• 37:21
  Speaker 3: And you also saw, what do you call it?
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: An echidna. The porcupine. An echidna.
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: It's basically a porcupine, yeah.
• 37:29
  Speaker 4: But it lays eggs. It lays eggs.
• 37:31
  Speaker 3: Do I ever get tired from making people's dreams come true?
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: Fair question. The answer is no. I'm indefatigable.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: But... This beach, you can't swim, because there's crocs and jellies,
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: and they'll kill you. And at night, there's wild boar.
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: And then, if you make it through all of that,
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: there are grifters living in the woods. I don't mean
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: grifters in the sense that they have shows on the
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: Daily Wire. I mean, like, there are people that live
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: in tents in the woods that will kill you if
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: the flora and the fauna and everything else doesn't kill you.
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah, last chance hobos.
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: Last chance hobos.
• 38:09
  Speaker 4: So.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: But it is stunningly beautiful, land before time, prehistoric shit.
• 38:14
  Speaker 3: There's crocodile infested rivers. It is cool to be in
• 38:16
  Speaker 3: a place that is deadly.
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: That being said, to do any of these things, I
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: love freedom and I hate rules. And we are in
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: a nanny state. And that is baked into the bones
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: of every human being that walks this continent. They like
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: rules and they want everything to be done for them.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: They like things planned for them. They like knowing when
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: they should eat, how they should eat, where they should go,
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: what's the approved boat, the approved tour. We left a tour.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: We walked off a tour because we were driven. And
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: by the way, they like to book everything through this resort.
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: They want to book it. They want to get the kickbacks, okay?
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: So as soon as you walk in, first of all,
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: as soon as you walk in, they start asking you
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: what your flight number is when you're leaving so that
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: they can get transportation because this is remote as fuck.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: We tried to get a car into town to get
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: Ben a cigar. You can't even get a car into town.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: So as soon as you walk in here, they're like,
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: here's the plan. Here's breakfast. Here's lunch.
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: Here's dinner. Here's the tour you're going.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: To go on.
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, hey, man, and when are you leaving?
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, hey, slow the fuck down here.
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: I just like freedom. I like to relax. There's nothing
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: relaxing about rules. There's no in-room dining. You can't just go, yeah,
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: I'm just chilling. Maybe I'll order a burger to the room.
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: There's none of that. You show up for a formal
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: dinner of shit food. And everybody who's in this area
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: is running from something. And this is, we bribed the
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: local woman who didn't have a driver's license to drive
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: us around. Lovely woman named, what's her name?
• 39:43
  Speaker 4: Zona.
• 39:44
  Speaker 3: Zona.
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: And she was a lovely woman. And she told us
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: that people are running. They owe their wives money. They're
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: on the run from the law.
• 39:54
  Speaker 3: And you see it in the waitresses, the faces here,
• 39:56
  Speaker 3: outside of Lauren.
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: Many of them are human trafficking victims, and they've trafficked
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: themselves to the far north reaches of Queensland, Australia, so
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: that they can serve gruel to these morons who buy
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: this fucking jungle experience, or whatever the hell this thing is.
• 40:15
  Speaker 3: It's not even.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: You know, the wildlife, you barely see it, and if
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: you see it, you're dead. Nature really is kind of
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: fake when you think about it. Like, you don't... You
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: rarely see it, you know? So the whole thing, from
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: stem to stern, unenjoyable. And the faces on these miserable people,
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: these miserable people that, for whatever reason, have been exiled
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: from society and are forced to... Get your flight number.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: What do you want, the tail number or the jet?
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: They're so in your business. So we went out with
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: this local lovely woman, and she took us around. And
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: we come back in, and one of these squawking birds
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: was like, where have you been? I'm like, what are you,
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: my mother? What do you mean, where have I been,
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: you bird? I've been where I want to be. It's
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: a fucking vacation.
• 41:10
  Speaker 3: But they're crims. Criminals.
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: They call them crims. And what that means is that
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: if you give the people on this continent even the
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: most cursory amount of freedom, they remember that their lineage is,
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: as you brilliantly said, horse thieves.
• 41:28
  Speaker 4: Pig fuckers.
• 41:28
  Speaker 3: Pig fuckers.
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: Farmers. Sheep thieves. These are criminals. They cannot be allotted
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: any freedoms. Even when you go on a vacation, there's
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: no freedom. None. It is a prison colony and this
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: resort is a prison. I have been in a prison.
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: It is not at all what you would consider luxurious.
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: It is a prison.
• 41:50
  Speaker 4: It's a gilded cage.
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: It's a gilded cage where they're in your business and
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: they're in your face and all they want to know
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: is what you're doing, who you're doing it with, how
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: it was. All they try to do is get in
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: your fucking business. Well, I don't want a mommy and
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: a daddy. I just want you to be... And they
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: said leave a comment card. I'm writing on the comment card, hey,
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: I have one of the top podcasts in America. You
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: can listen to.
• 42:16
  Speaker 3: My review of your resort if you can't get.
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: Wi-Fi, which is horrible here. Am I wrong about this, Sam?
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: I mean, you're here. Am I overstating it?
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: I mean, you lend yourself to comedic hyperbole typically, but no.
• 42:32
  Speaker 4: This is valid and justified. They've been keeping tabs on
• 42:37
  Speaker 4: us when you're paying $ 15, 000 for three days to be here.
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 42:41
  Speaker 4: They're all over us. The woman who's been serving us
• 42:44
  Speaker 4: food before we got Lauren was dead-eyed, bleached out.
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: Well, it's Sticky Fingers Karen.
• 42:49
  Speaker 4: Well, that's not even Karen. I'm talking about the gaunt
• 42:52
  Speaker 4: woman who wouldn't make eye contact and flinched whenever we
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: picked up a fork.
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: And we like Karen.
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: Karen's fine.
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: She was lovely, but I believe she's probably here because
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: she had a little problem with the credit cards.
• 43:01
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah.
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: And she liked to get credit cards that weren't her own.
• 43:04
  Speaker 4: Mm-mm.
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: You can see in their eyes that they're thieves, criminals.
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: You can see the lineage in their eyes.
• 43:11
  Speaker 4: But they're not clever enough to pull off any grand
• 43:13
  Speaker 4: schemes or heists, so now they're here, not getting tipped.
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: And we had to walk off a tour because we
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: had this guy, and he started the tour, but we
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: go to some little.
• 43:25
  Speaker 3: Like, rec center, okay?
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: And he's like, you see, this is what governments can
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: do when they really put their mind to it. We've
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: treated the indigenous people very poorly, but now we've got
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: this rec center for them. And then he's like, there's
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: a lot more white trash than black trash in Australia.
• 43:45
  Speaker 4: He says, I don't know about America.
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: I don't know if you have racial problems over there.
• 43:49
  Speaker 3: It's like, of course we do. And you do know that, sir.
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: As limited as you are, you do know that we
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: have racial problems. And why are we talking about genocide
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: at 8 a.m.? To.
• 44:00
  Speaker 3: Show me a, what is it, a watermelon?
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: A pat-a-melon.
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: Just show me a pat-a-melon, the large rat. I don't
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: want to hear about the genocide. It's eight in the
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: fucking morning.
• 44:09
  Speaker 4: We haven't had coffee yet.
• 44:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we haven't had coffee.
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: I don't want to do the displacement of an entire
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: group of people. Then he goes, there's going to be
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: an indigenous ceremony. I'm like, wait a minute.
• 44:21
  Speaker 3: Why are we a part of it with three white dudes?
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: What are you talking about? And then Kona, Zona?
• 44:27
  Speaker 4: Zona.
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: She told us, she's like, yeah, it's just like a
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: smoke ceremony ceremony. And it's like, you see what some
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: bullshit ceremonies they make like indigenous people do. And like
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: all these white fucking tourists come in here and just
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: have to.
• 44:40
  Speaker 3: Like, stay there. And I'm like, hey man, I don't
• 44:42
  Speaker 3: need them dancing and putting on a show for me.
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: If they want to do like a cool indigenous ceremony
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: or if they want to address the Brandon Shaw, Bobby
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: Lee issue and they want to like somehow heal the
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: comedy community with communing with the spirit, that's fine. But
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: I don't need some type of show. So we had
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: to leave the tour. And you knew it was happening
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: as soon as we got on this bus with other people.
• 45:05
  Speaker 4: As soon as the doors opened, I saw there was
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: other people in there wearing shorts and safari hats. And
• 45:11
  Speaker 4: I was like counting down in my head. So how
• 45:15
  Speaker 4: long will we make it on this? First stop, second stop.
• 45:17
  Speaker 4: And then as soon as I shut the door, I
• 45:19
  Speaker 4: felt the group chat buzz in my pocket. And I
• 45:21
  Speaker 4: knew we were getting off immediately.
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: Because number one, I wanted a private tour. I'm not
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: trying to be on there with other idiots that got
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: duped into this.
• 45:28
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: Number two.
• 45:29
  Speaker 4: They were the Australian Disney couples. They were sexless people.
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah. They were sexless, and it was worse than that.
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: It was that they really wanted to learn something, but
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: they didn't, but they did. I hate people that want
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: to go on a vacation. It's like, read a goddamn book.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: What are you going to learn in eight minutes? What
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: are you going to learn on a half-a-day tour about
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: what really happened here?
• 45:59
  Speaker 3: Like, can you stop? I hate, and like when this.
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: Guy, this moron, Mick, God, I hope he hears this.
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: When he talked, the people in the bus were like,
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: they had stern faces, and they were like nodding, and
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: it was very grave, and they were like, we're taking
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: it seriously. Seriously. We understand how hard it's been. And
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: I'm like, you know what, man? This is just not
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: my vibe. So we had to peace out.
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: I'm like, sorry, sir. We're supposed to be at the
• 46:30
  Speaker 3: Great Barrier Reef smoking cigarettes.
• 46:33
  Speaker 4: It was a very solemn affair, but he was also
• 46:36
  Speaker 4: doing his sticky tour bus driver jokes.
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: It's the worst. I was a tour guide. Tour guides
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: are damned people. They're damned. They're forced to be a
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: visitor in the place that they live constantly. It's a
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: constant Groundhog Day movie where every day is the same.
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: The people come and go. Tour guides are forced to
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: be spectators. They are damned. I was one of them,
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: but I was doing comedy at night. So I know
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: what it's like. And that hacky schtick they all do...
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: was so, it's so sad. When a tour guide throws
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: out a joke that bombs, you wish for his own
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: sake that he just blows his brains out in front
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: of you. You wanna see brain matter splatter on the
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: windshield of that van after one of those hacky jokes
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: doesn't land because it's so sad.
• 47:38
  Speaker 3: When they do that. And then he tries to sound
• 47:41
  Speaker 3: morally superior.
• 47:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's the issue is when he's like, we was
• 47:44
  Speaker 4: a genocide and we stole the babies and fed them
• 47:46
  Speaker 4: to dingoes.
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 47:48
  Speaker 4: Didgeridoo, don't ask me about it.
• 47:49
  Speaker 3: And now we have a community center.
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It's a community center.
• 47:57
  Speaker 3: I mean, Ben, what are your.
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: So I just... I mean, what are your.
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: I just.
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: Did a brief... I mean, what are you.
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: Think about these things so remember he was like and that's.
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: True but the other thing I think if you really
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: think about it no I'm kidding go on Ben the
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: perpetually ungrateful Ben Avery world traveler just doesn't care go.
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: On so remember how he told us the K's are
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: pronounced with a G so I looked this up they're
• 48:27
  Speaker 2: the Gugu Yolangi this was the group that was here
• 48:31
  Speaker 2: that was supposedly you know taken over right I did
• 48:34
  Speaker 2: some digging. Turns out the Gugu Yalanji hunted Chinese for
• 48:39
  Speaker 2: cannibalistic feasting. So they would eat people. So I wonder
• 48:42
  Speaker 2: if he goes into that on the tour at all.
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: Well, I wish I knew that. This is why you
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: got to Google before we go on the tour. Because
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: I would have said, hey, Mick, I heard that they
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: used to hunt Chinese people and eat them.
• 48:56
  Speaker 3: And I don't even know if I'm against that.
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying, if we're going to have a fact-finding
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: mission at 8 o'clock in the morning... That's what Schaub's
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: going to do with Bobby. Now, where did you find
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: this out, Ben? Are you on one of those sites
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: you go on?
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: No, I went to Wikipedia and then went to a
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: separate article that was cited.
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: And they said that they... hunted the Chinese and ate them?
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so modern historians now consider that these early reports,
• 49:26
  Speaker 2: like the tales of the Kuku Yulanji hunting Chinese for
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: cannibalistic feasting, whatever partial truth they contained, functions to assuage
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: any guilt Europeans... Assuage. Assuage any guilt.
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: Assuage.
• 49:36
  Speaker 4: Sorry.
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: Not a sewage.
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: Any guilt European settlers may have felt for their key
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: role in the dissemination of northern Queensland Aboriginal communities. So
• 49:44
  Speaker 2: that is a disputed thing. I don't want to disparage
• 49:47
  Speaker 2: the good people here, but I mean.
• 49:50
  Speaker 4: In this instance, what does Chinese person mean?
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: Oh, good question.
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: Now, this tribe, this tribe, the Lululemon, what did they...
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: I think a lot of these.
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: The Lululemon.
• 50:03
  Speaker 3: The Lululemon maybe ate a few Chinese people, but.
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: Did they deserve to have their land taken so that
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: they could build this shit hotel and get my business
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: and serve me shit food and charge me an arm
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: and a leg so that they can run around like
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: a Stasi wanting to know where I am at every
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: moment of the fucking day?
• 50:26
  Speaker 3: I'd rather be here eating Chinese babies with the Lululemon.
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: I mean, they even have to qualify it. They're dismissing it,
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: but they also have to qualify it, saying whatever partial
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: truth that contains.
• 50:39
  Speaker 3: Here's the deal, folks. White people are horrifically violent.
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: But if you think that natives were all, it was
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: all like sunshine and happy songs, it's not the case.
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: There were tribes, there was warfare, there was violence, there
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: was pillaging, there was conquering, there was cannibalism. I mean,
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: violence is not the providence only of white European settlers.
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: It was really the currency of the world. I mean,
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: people that have an ignorance of history or that only
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: study the colonial era and they don't look back at
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: ancient history, they don't know anything about antiquity, they don't
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: know anything about You know, they get a very skewed
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: view of the world, and they tend to demonize Western
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: civilization that has a litany of problems, and like every civilization,
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: was built on oppression, plundering, killing, murdering. But before that, listen,
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: there's very few countries that were established by people showing
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: up and going, hey, do you mind if we get
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: in on this? That's not the way the world worked.
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: It was a world of conquerors and killers, of diseases,
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: you know? People have to chill the fuck out.
• 51:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, blood meridian. Violence is man.
• 51:53
  Speaker 3: That's right.
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: Men are violent people, and so are women. And, you know,
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: we just got to move on from this. It doesn't
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: matter that they ate Chinese children or adults. It doesn't
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: bother me. The Lululemon can do whatever they want.
• 52:13
  Speaker 3: Is there a spokesman for the Lululemon?
• 52:16
  Speaker 2: For the Coochie?
• 52:18
  Speaker 4: His book is in our bathroom right now.
• 52:21
  Speaker 2: Oh, I saw that.
• 52:23
  Speaker 4: I dropped it behind the window and I can't get
• 52:25
  Speaker 4: it out.
• 52:25
  Speaker 7: Oh, yeah.
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: I tried to get at it, too, when I.
• 52:27
  Speaker 4: Was taking a shit. One of the elders of, I think,
• 52:30
  Speaker 4: this tribe, there's a book of his photography in our room.
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: Well, I'm just siding with them because they haven't been
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: fucking me for three days, serving me shit and getting
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: in my business.
• 52:40
  Speaker 3: So I don't care what they did. I would have
• 52:42
  Speaker 3: rather hang out with them.
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: There is an indigenous swimming hole here called the Blue
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: Hole that you're not allowed.
• 52:48
  Speaker 4: To go in.
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: Because it's for the local women to bathe. And some
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: people did. And one guy said he was cursed and
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: he's now sterile. Let's move on here because I don't
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: want to lose myself. This isn't a show that's going to...
• 53:06
  Speaker 1: I'm not a travel blogger. I'll be back home next week.
• 53:11
  Speaker 1: I just want to let everybody know... that the Silky
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: Oaks Lodge in Queensland, Australia is running a human trafficking ring.
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: Do with that information what you will. Many people right
• 53:23
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• 56:17
  Speaker 3: Roe v. Wade, that is in the news. Roe v.
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: Wade.
• 56:22
  Speaker 3: The Supreme Court potentially overturning Roe v.
• 56:26
  Speaker 1: Wade. The federal protections for abortion going to be eliminated.
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: States like Texas... maybe Louisiana, places like that, criminalizing abortion,
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: potentially making it a felony, perhaps.
• 56:43
  Speaker 3: Are we headed backwards towards the dark ages?
• 56:45
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 56:45
  Speaker 3: However, you know, here's the point that needs to be made.
• 56:50
  Speaker 3: There's got to be a period.
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: Of time between conception and birth where an abortion is legal.
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: After a certain amount of time, it is cruel, inhuman,
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: and it is murder. You can't have an abortion at
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: eight months.
• 57:06
  Speaker 4: Well... Right?
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: May I? Yes.
• 57:10
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 57:11
  Speaker 3: Because now you're going to say, if the mother's life
• 57:15
  Speaker 3: is in danger.
• 57:16
  Speaker 4: No, I'm not.
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: You're going to say... Okay, well, what are you going
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: to say?
• 57:20
  Speaker 4: I'm going to say that usually when it's a very
• 57:22
  Speaker 4: late-term abortion, it's one of two things. It's either the
• 57:25
  Speaker 4: fact that they do a scan on the baby and
• 57:28
  Speaker 4: it's not developing the way they thought it would and
• 57:30
  Speaker 4: it's not going to be born with a heart or
• 57:32
  Speaker 4: it doesn't have a head... it's some very gross mutation
• 57:36
  Speaker 4: that will not allow the child to live outside the utero.
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 57:41
  Speaker 4: Or when it gets into a sixth or seventh month,
• 57:43
  Speaker 4: it's because there's certain places in the country where you
• 57:46
  Speaker 4: need to be, you have to wait two weeks to
• 57:49
  Speaker 4: get it all done, and then you work at Arby's
• 57:51
  Speaker 4: and you have to get to Abilene, Texas from Houston.
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: I understand, but that to me doesn't matter. If you
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: have a seven-month baby inside of you, I don't care
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: how long it's taken you to find out that you're pregnant.
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: I don't care that you had to go from Arby's
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: to Abilene, which I imagine they have an Arby's in Abilene.
• 58:10
  Speaker 2: They do, yeah.
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: You had prom there, right? You cannot eliminate a full–
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: I mean, seven months. Kids are born at seven months
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: and live happy lives. That's a fully formed fetus. Are
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: you saying that you should be able to eliminate a
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: seven-month pregnancy?
• 58:26
  Speaker 4: I'm just saying that a lot of these instances are
• 58:29
  Speaker 4: just a matter of.
• 58:30
  Speaker 3: I get the heart thing. I get a baby can't
• 58:32
  Speaker 3: live outside.
• 58:33
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: I get that. But what I don't get is like, hey, man,
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: I didn't have the time.
• 58:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 58:38
  Speaker 3: I don't get that.
• 58:39
  Speaker 4: I think 99% of the cases, it's born with a
• 58:41
  Speaker 4: foot for a brain, so they have to kill it
• 58:44
  Speaker 4: before it comes out because it won't live outside. But
• 58:47
  Speaker 4: there are these instances of women not being able.
• 58:48
  Speaker 3: I know people with feet for brains that live in mansions.
• 58:52
  Speaker 3: But I get what you're saying.
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 58:54
  Speaker 3: I'm not trying to be insensitive.
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: To the plight of a mother that is struggling with
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: the fact that the child will not be able to survive.
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: But I don't think you could just say at seven months, hey,
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: they have Down syndrome, let's flush it.
• 59:08
  Speaker 4: And I'm not defending it either way. I'm just saying
• 59:10
  Speaker 4: these are the reasons people have late-term abortions.
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: I understand.
• 59:15
  Speaker 4: Because I'm already going to get my hole ripped open
• 59:19
  Speaker 4: from even weighing in on it. No, no, no, no, no.
• 59:22
  Speaker 3: Well, you've got to weigh in. It's the way of
• 59:24
  Speaker 3: the world.
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: I'm saying that in Europe, And in the UK, in
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: most places, I don't know how long it is, but
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: it's usually.
• 59:37
  Speaker 3: Ben, can you look up.
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: The UK abortions, the vast majority of them, are before
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: 20 weeks, I don't know what, or 25 weeks. I'm unsure.
• 59:46
  Speaker 3: This is not an area that I've done a hell
• 59:49
  Speaker 3: of a lot of research.
• 59:50
  Speaker 4: No, I'm not an expert in third trimester abortions.
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: And I believe that abortion should be legal in America. Yeah.
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: And federally legal. I don't believe because I think that
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: it just hurts poor women that have to make all
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 1: these arrangements to go to another state and have an abortion.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: I don't believe in returning here to the dark ages.
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: It's not good.
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 4: Well, the great state of Colorado made it a constitutional
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 4: protected right.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 3: Well, I think New York did too.
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: I mean, there's some.
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: You know, but I also believe that after a certain point,
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 1: it's tough to make the moral argument.
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 2: So, like, nine out of ten abortions are done before
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 2: 12 weeks in most high-income countries. So I'm assuming that
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: falls within the UK, would be that. So nine out
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: of ten done before 12 weeks, which would be, what,
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: three months?
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 4: Mm-hmm.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: Keep it under three, ladies. Please? Please? That's all. What?
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: I mean, Sam, give me a face. I'm trying to
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: come up with a compromise here. The world's not going
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 1: to be fucking Denver. So we need to have a compromise.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: We can't just, I have to be the voice of reason.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: I believe in legal federal abortion rights. But I also
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: believe that you can't, like, six months into a pregnancy, Go, hey,
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 1: this ain't for me. I don't believe that.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 3: That's a baby. At three months, it's not a baby. So, hey, ladies.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: Okay, so.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 1: Hey, ladies, when you're out there for ladies night, just
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: keep it under three months, please. Many of those states
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: are going to outlaw the pill, too. So, I mean,
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: we're really going to the dark age. But this is
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: the pushback against gender's not real and all this other
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 1: stuff that's happening where you have this encroaching madness that
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: you're seeing all over the place. People are going to,
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: you know, they're going to deeply entrench themselves in like,
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: you know, like theocratic... Christianity, where they go, well, now
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 1: we have to live in a theocracy, which is not
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 1: the answer either. Because there's a lot of people that
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: don't subscribe to Christianity. But I'm just saying, morally, in
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 1: a humanist way, six months, you can't start. You know,
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: we can't do this.
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 4: Well, they're still going to have the abortions. They're just
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 4: going to pass away from getting shoddy work done.
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 1: Well, if you're going to have an abortion at seven months,
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: when you have a fully formed baby.
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 4: Inside of you. Those are fun women, though. Those are
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 4: the ones who get knocked up. They're kind of, well,
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 4: you know, this isn't for me. I want to go
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 4: to Cabo. We're going to lose the fun women.
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 3: See, that's when I have a little bit of an
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 3: issue with it.
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 4: Because I.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: Think there should be a happy medium in this country
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 1: between ending all abortion and allowing people at eight months
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: who go, you know, maybe this isn't for me, to
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 1: flush the baby. There's got to be a happy medium.
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 1: And it's Ladies, let's keep it under three. Keep it
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 1: under three months.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 3: Well, you don't know you're pregnant until... Well, pay attention!
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 3: Pay attention to your body!
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 1: If I was pregnant, I'd know.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 2: I have a medical paper here from England and Wales.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: Hey, good job over there.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: So here are the major reasons for having an abortion
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 2: after 13 plus weeks of gestation.
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 1: Can I... I complimented you. And you don't even say
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 1: thank you.
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 2: Well, it was condescending.
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 1: Why was it condescending?
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 2: The tone was condescending.
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 1: How was it condescending?
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 2: Because you were implying that I typically don't do my job.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: That's a very negative way to look at it. I
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: said good job. You then believed that I was being condescending.
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: Do you have guilt that you don't do a good job?
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: Are you guilty?
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 2: I mean, I have feelings of worthlessness, and I guess
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 2: I feel guilty a lot of the time.
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but those are your feelings, not my feelings.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: You asked me how I feel, though.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: Right, but I don't make you feel that way, do I?
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 2: What are you making about you? You asked me how
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 2: I feel.
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 1: Yes, but my point is that when I say good job,
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to compliment you, and you are wrapping up
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 1: your own self-concept in it. All I do is try
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: to do the right thing by not only you, but
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 1: every man, woman... non-binary person, child, elderly, ancient elder, indigenous person,
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 1: and guardian of the land, that I've always just tried
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 1: to do the right thing.
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 3: So I just say, good job.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: That's all I'm saying. Does it sound condescending when I say,
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: good job? Does that really sound condescending? Yeah. I think
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 1: you have internal guilt that you are racked with. Mm-hmm.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 1: Because perhaps you feel that you are not worthy of
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: the compliments that I give. But that is not my fault.
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 1: I want you to look in the mirror and give
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: yourself a big kiss. Okay? Okay.
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 3: Now please tell us about that medical paper from Wales.
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 2: And England.
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 1: Good.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 2: So here are the reasons that you're looking for in
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 2: terms of why people have abortions after 13 weeks of gestation.
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 1: Yes. They're hoes.
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 2: So at the top of the list.
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 4: Is the top 10 list like Letterman? Yeah. Can you
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 4: do it like Letterman?
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 3: Number 10.
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 2: So 41% of people said, I was not sure about
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 2: having the abortion and it took me a while to
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 2: make my mind up and ask for one.
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 1: Not good. Not a credible answer. Move on. It's not.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 2: Second is, here's 38% of people say, I didn't realize
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 2: I was pregnant earlier because my periods are irregular.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 1: That is more understandable. That is a lot more understandable than, hey,
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 1: it's six months in, and I'm still on the fence. Inappropriate.
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 4: What about 13 weeks, though? Fine.
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 1: Is that under three?
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 2: That's one more than this. That would be three months
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 2: in a week?
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Fine.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 3: Just keep it around three. The number is three.
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 2: So then we have, let's see here. Oh, this isn't percentages.
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 2: This is out of 858 people. So that was 41
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 2: people and then 38. Now 36, and I'm going down
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 2: in the majorities here, 36 people said, I thought the
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 2: pregnancy was much less advanced than it was when I
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 2: asked for the abortion.
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: Wait, what?
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 2: It says, I thought the pregnancy was much less advanced
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 2: than it was when I asked for the abortion.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 4: They thought they were at one month and they were
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 4: really at four.
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 2: I believe so, yeah.
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: Okay. All right.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 2: 32 people say, I wasn't sure what I would do
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 2: if I were pregnant. That's coming in at number four.
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 2: Number five, I didn't realize I was pregnant earlier because
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 2: I was using contraception. So they assume because they're using
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 2: the ring thing or they're on the pill.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're not getting your period. Fair.
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 2: 30 people say, I suspected I was pregnant, but I
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 2: didn't do anything about it until weeks had gone by.
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 2: 26 people said, I was worried how my parents would react.
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 2: 24 people said, I had to wait more than five
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 2: days before I could get a consultation appointment to get
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 2: the go-ahead for the abortion.
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: And the number one reason that people have late-term abortions is.
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 4: I found out Brendan Schaub was the father.
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 1: Paul Shane from the band. Man.
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 4: Man.
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I got more reasons here. You want to
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 2: hear them?
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 2: I got like five more. Okay. So one person says,
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 2: so 23 people say, my relationship with my partner broke
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 2: down slash changed.
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 1: Not good.
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 2: High stress, you're pregnant, and you realize you don't want
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 2: to go through with it.
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, these are all not.
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 2: Okay, then 22 people say, I was worried about what
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 2: was involved in having an abortion, so it took me
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 2: a while to ask for one. So they were scared.
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 3: Okay, but still, get it under, ladies.
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 1: Under three.
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 2: Then we have 20 people say, I had to wait
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 2: more than seven days between the consultation.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 1: How about I give you four? Four months. At four months,
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 1: that's still kind of a baby.
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 4: You're shark tanking this thing?
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm going to give you four months. I'm going
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 1: to give you four months.
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 3: We've got to make a deal.
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 1: Nobody wants to make deals in this country anymore. Let
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 1: me make a deal. Ladies... Four months, I'll give you four.
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 3: Four months, but you love freedom.
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 4: You love your freedom above all else.
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 1: I don't think you could take an eight-month-old baby and
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 1: have an abortion. That is a very difficult thing for
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: me morally to get behind. That is a hard thing
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: for me. unless there is a tremendous medical reason, if
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 1: you have a fully formed baby inside of you, it
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: is very tough for me to co-sign that, to be honest.
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: I just... I mean, the baby's born in a month.
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 1: We should make adoption easier in this country. It is
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 1: criminal how horrible the process is to adopt. And here
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 1: is the other problem. Adopted kids are always thieves and
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 1: untrustworthy because they can never get over... And Giannis Papas
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 1: and me talk about this. They can never get over
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 1: the feeling of abandonment from their mother. It's baked into
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 1: their bones.
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 4: Russian orphanage syndrome.
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 3: The way the nanny state is baked into the bones
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 3: of the Aussies.
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: And... So you are going to have a crim for
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 1: a child. You're going to have a goddamn crim. But
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 1: I still think it should be made easier. It's difficult, Ben.
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 1: Where do you stand on this, Ben? The people want
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: to know. The people want to know where you're at,
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: how you feel, weigh in. Please.
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 2: Well, it seems to be like a lot of things, right?
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 2: Like prostitution, drugs, abortion, where if you outlaw certain things,
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 2: you create a whole other litany of problems and it
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 2: doesn't necessarily stop the action thereof. So, I mean, to
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 2: have an opinion on it seems somewhat pointless, right? Because
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 2: people are going to have them no matter what.
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 1: Well, I have to earn a living, so I think
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: I might have to have one. I don't think it's pointless.
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 1: How do you pay your rent? Completely pointless? Don't you
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 1: have a new car? Anyway, I'll tell you this. I'm
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 1: running on the platform. Ladies, let's keep it around three, please.
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 1: Can we keep it around three, you bunch of birds?
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 1: I understand there's reasons for later. It's a case by case.
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying in eight months, You don't feel a
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: little bad about that, Sam? Eight months, baby's fully formed?
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 4: I think this should be the last option. But I
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 4: also am with Ben on the issue that they're going
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 4: to do it anyway.
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but everybody's going to do everything anyway. People are
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 1: going to do fentanyl anyway. Yeah, yeah. Right?
• 1:11:32
  Speaker 4: We outlawed fentanyl. Does that mean we legalized fentanyl? Well,
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 4: I mean, if you did legalize, I mean, we're getting
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 4: in some very murky water. If you legalize fentanyl, though,
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 4: then people will, you know, do it supervised and it'll
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 4: be easier.
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 1: I just mean there's so many, well, are they going
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 1: to do it supervised? I love, that's my favorite argument
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: for drug legalization where it's like, you legalize fentanyl, they'll
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 1: just do it to supervise. It's like, will they? Is
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 1: that the way they're going to do it? Well, all right,
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 1: it's Wednesday. Today's fentanyl day. I'm going for a supervised
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 1: fentanyl visit. Yeah, it's all supervised and legal. I'll just
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 1: go in, I'll do fentanyl, I'll walk out and everything's okay.
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 1: I understand what you're saying, but I do believe, I mean,
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 1: perhaps I am further to the right than both of
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 1: you gentlemen, because I do believe in a little bit
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 1: of morality. I do. And it's a lot of gays,
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 1: and gay men specifically, that are forced to kind of,
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 1: and you see a lot of these gay men coming
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: out and saying these things that we need to have
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 1: a little bit of a moral country. And it's interesting
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 1: to see because a lot of, of the more, you know, pansexual,
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 1: like out there kind of, you know, people are not,
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: but I think a lot of gay men are starting
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 1: to go, listen, ladies, let's just keep, can we keep it?
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 1: Can we just calm it down? Let's just not flush
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 1: it at.
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 3: Eight and a half months.
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 1: Let's not do that. It should be a thing that
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 1: You know, do we need, like, there's some people in
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 1: this country, I mean, people have one-man shows about their abortions.
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 3: It's like, okay, but do we need that? Do we
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 3: need abortion cafes? Is that next?
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 1: Should you be able to get an abortion at Starbucks with.
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 3: A caramel macchiato?
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I just think it's weird that gay
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 1: men are starting to become the moral guardians of America now.
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 3: It's very weird. But it's, you know, I mean, lesbians
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 3: are hopeless.
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 1: The vast majority of them are more suited towards agriculture,
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 1: which is fine, but gay men right now are kind of,
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 1: you know, some of us, not all of us, by
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: no means all of us, probably not even a majority,
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: but there is a vocal minority of gay men who
• 1:13:49
  Speaker 1: are saying, let's kind of keep women in their box,
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 1: which I think is kind of important. And it should
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 1: be a box with velvet where they're comfortable, but like
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 1: I think gay men are the ones who have, because
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 1: we're not like, the power of the pussy doesn't really
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 1: affect us.
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 3: So we're able to say, ladies, how about we calm
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 3: it down?
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 1: And that's important, because a lot of straight men that
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 1: just want to get pussy are like, yeah, whatever. Flush
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 1: the babe. Do whatever you want. Ban everything. We should
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: only be able to use water for a minute and
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 1: a half in the shower. And gay men are going, hey,
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 1: get your pussy away from me, baby killer. And don't
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 1: we need a population of people? But let's bring it
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 1: back to what really matters.
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 3: Bobby Lee, Kalilah, Annie Letterman, Brendan Schaub, Roe v.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 1: Wade. That's how we started the show. Many moral questions,
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 1: no easy answers. No easy answers. Many moral questions, quandaries, deep, complex, important.
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 1: They matter. I don't know. I don't know. But I
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 1: do know. And that's the horror that I live with
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 1: every day. It's the struggle of being me. Not knowing,
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 1: but also knowing well. You know? Have you enjoyed your
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 1: time in Australia? We're leaving soon.
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 3: We have one more day here, and then we'll be
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 3: back in our studio.
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a wonderful... place. I mean, we saw the
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 2: whole thing.
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 1: We really did.
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 2: Six cities. Not five, but six.
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 2: By the way, what was it called? Point Tribulation? Cape Tribulation.
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 2: Three people just died on the road there in one
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 2: day on the way up.
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 3: Well, they're drunk.
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 2: We're scared of the crocs. Doing any research, people flip
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 2: over those roads all the time and kill themselves.
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 4: There's no police, remember?
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 2: And the people aren't registered to drive.
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 2: Maybe you do need laws.
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 1: Maybe you do need laws. A brilliant end. A brilliant end.
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 1: It's dangerous here in the rainforest. It's dangerous in the
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 1: Comedy Store parking lot. Danger lurks behind every door. But
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 1: my consistent position is that I wish the best for
• 1:16:41
  Speaker 1: everyone involved. And I just don't want to see them,
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 1: hear from them, hear about them at all, ever, for
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 1: any reason. And then we're good. We're good. As long
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 1: as that promise can be made to me. So that
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 1: is my position. It's my position on everything. Get away
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 1: from me. And as far as the Silky Oaks Lodge
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 1: in Mossman, where the hell are we? Yeah.
• 1:17:17
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess. I guess so, yeah.
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 1: You're trying to be a grown-up resort, but you don't
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 1: know how. You're a nation of crims, and that's okay.
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 1: But you need to give people freedom.
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 3: You need to fire your chef, You need to fire
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 3: most of your staff besides Lauren.
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 1: Some of the guys are hot. But nobody really wants
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 1: to spend this kind of money to take a shuttle
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 1: bus into a venomous hellscape to be here served horseshit
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 1: by Swedish human trafficking victims. Please get it the fuck
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 1: together because now I have to go to the Four
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 1: Seasons in Maui. And I hope Rogan hasn't booked my
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 1: Fucking sweet. Well, anyway, for fans of comedy and MMA,
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 1: those two concentric circles. For MMA fans and comedy fans,
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 1: this has been the Tim Dillon Show with Sam Talent,
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 1: the perpetually ungrateful Ben Avery, live from Queensland, Australia. Tomorrow,
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 1: we eat at Mr. Wong's in Sydney. And then the
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 1: next day, we're out of here. And we're coming home
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 1: where the venom lives in the people. Good night.