Latest / How Hard Can It Be? with Diana Maria Riva / Happy Hour with Tina: Lisa Lisa, Caring for an Ailing Parent & Folding Laundry

Transcript

Happy Hour with Tina: Lisa Lisa, Caring for an Ailing Parent & Folding Laundry · How Hard Can It Be? with Diana Maria Riva

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: It's one of our most favorite days of the week,
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Happy Hour with Tina. Okay, we got our La Marca.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: I went I went extra large, I.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Went small, I went rose because I'm in the rose mood.
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: I just got the regular one, which is so delicious. Cheers,
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: clink clink.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: I'm getting ready hold on.
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: Oh sorry, I mean I came in ready.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: Okay, cheers clink yay, thank you. All right, let's dive
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: in because this week's episode was really, really fascinating with
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: icon extraordinary anthem of our days back in Cincinnati, Ohio,
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: trapesing around the UC campus in our cards with the
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: hair coming out the sun roof, Lisa Lisa.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: And the headband.
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: The headband. Not everybody could wear it, we could, we could.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: I mean, how was it? How full circle was it
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: to hear her and see that she came in to
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: the studio to have this interview with me.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: It was amazing because the second it was like, within
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: seconds of hearing her voice, yeah, I was like, oh,
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: it was starting to like jump up and down for you.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: And I'm thinking to myself, she's talking to I didn't know.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: I was so excited and in the end, and then
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: when you said Timberwolf. Yeah, I almost fell over because
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: I went, oh, my gosh, what a blast from the past.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: It was full circle when we went to the concert
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: at Timberwolf, and then at the end we even did
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: a little like three verses of her song together, and
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: I was like, it was full circle.
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: It's jealous, I can't sing.
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, honey, that's okay, you leave that to me.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: But the best part, I think too, was just seeing
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: how how big her life has been, how long her
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: career has been, and yet how human and how much
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: she's a woman walking in the same, very similar shoes
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: to most women in this chapter, and one in particular
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: that when she was telling me this story, I thought,
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: for sure had to have resonated with you. When she
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: talked about taking care of her mother with Alzheimer's and.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: Although you know my mom didn't have Alzheimer's, I spent
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: a whole entire year of my life June to June, rehabbing, praying, feeding, loving,
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: taking care of the whole nine yards. And when she said,
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: I'm trying not to cry, because when I listened to her,
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: when I saw that podcast, I did cry the whole time.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: When she was talking about her mom, and you could
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: hear the respect in her voice, you could hear the
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: love and the care she had for her up until
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: the very end. And that's kind I understood it because
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: even though your mom changes, and your mom isn't your
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: mom anymore, your your heart, you know you're doing everything
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: you can for that woman until the last second you
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: can't anymore. And and even though it is a terrible,
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: terribly hard thing to go through later and she might
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: feel the same way, it's a gift that we can say,
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: you know, birth to death. I mean, it's it was.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: It was amazing. But she she I love when she
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: said I needed to do that for her.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's how I felt.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: Because I had people all the time asking me, you know,
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: you could you could hire this. I said, I know,
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: but I need to be here every day. I need
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: to be I know there's people here helping me. There's nurses,
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: there's as, there's therapists. I get it, but I had
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: to be there every day.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: That was a definite, full circle, fulfilling moment that I
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: could see in her. That was fulfilling to her as
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: a daughter and fulfilling to her as a woman being
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: there for this other woman because now Obviously, Lisa was
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: in a stage in her life where she has been
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: a mother. She is a mother, and she understands where
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: that her mother's bond was coming from, and her mother
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: even saying. One of the things that got to me
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: is when she said that, even in her final days,
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: where she was saying, tell your brothers and sisters, I'm
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: sorry that I'm not there, still apologizing for what This
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: woman had taken care of ten children on her own
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: and the neighborhood. And she was a neighborhood mom where
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: everyone came there, they were taken care of by her.
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: She looked out for everyone.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: And yet in those moments where her body is fading
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: on her, she has the clarity to say, I still
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: had more to do and I'm sorry. I don't know
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: how that would settle with you, but as a mother,
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: I get that I would. I think I would feel
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: the same way.
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: I'm not done. I wanted, I want to do more.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: Not done till the yeah, till the last second yeah.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: And she kept going, Oh. She talked about saving stuff,
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: and that was when I when I cleaned out, when
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: I that, and that helped me in my motherhood. Now,
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: when I went back to my mom's house after she
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: had passed and we had to clean the house house.
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: I was like, are you kidding? Are you serious? And
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: one of them I will have the things that she saved.
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, there's you're in there too. You were in
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: her files, like with CTM and that you you know,
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: you were in this play and there you are, and
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: I'm going I mean, I.
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: Was like, you know you love me?
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: And uh, there were wedding you know when you go
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: to a wedding and you get the little program.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she saved everybody's wedding program.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: Wedding lots of wedding programs.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: The little doileys that they make, and a little bag
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: of almonds. They always tasted stale, so why throw them away?
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: I said to myself self, do not do this to
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: your children. And I used to be a I think
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: more of a saver than I am now because I
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: had to go through that. Going through that made me
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: realize it's just stuff. Yeah, it's stuff, And I mean
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: it might be our stuff, and we like our stuff
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: right now, but in the end, what is the message? Yeah,
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: the time and the love and the memories of the stuff.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but you've been able to do that that you
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: had that with your mom. The two of you were
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: best friends like that. That's the thing that really got
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: to me when she passed and watching you as my
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: best friend walk through this is that you had lost
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: a best friend and there was nobody. Listen, I always say,
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: there's nobody in my life that celebrates life greater than Tina.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: And even though I feel I do, you are times
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: ten there was nobody who celebrated life more than Tina.
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: Than Jerry, your mom. Like you learn from the best,
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: and it was like I had.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: Everywhere you go, you knew when Jerry was there because
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: she was either dancing with her little finger or high
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: had and you have made life about that when you
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: decided to I love what you say about retiring. What
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: do you say about retiring?
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: How do you?
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: How do you?
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: How do you?
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: Had this sentence said to me countless countless times, I thought,
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: you retired? Why are you so busy? Weren't you supposed
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: to be retired? Didn't you retire? And I said, yes,
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: I did. I retired from stress. I retired in stress.
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: I didn't retire. I don't sit around. I mean I
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: have too much energy and all of the jobs that
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: I'm doing now are fun. Yeah, they are stress free,
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: they're helping others, they're I love everything I'm doing. But
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: am I busy? Yes, I'm very.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: Busy trying to get this bitch available to do this podcast,
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: which she agreed to.
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: I'm like, whose schedule are we on mire?
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: Yours states?
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: I have to like, when are you not traveling? That's
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: actually the easier calendar to keep up with. You know
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: what else I love? One of the one of the
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: things that made me laugh out loud was when Lisa
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: said that one of her methods of self care and
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: zen is folding clothes.
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: I couldn't wait to talk about this.
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: I bet you could.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: I'm sitting there listening to this podcast, watching this podcast
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: going Lisa. Lisa and I have more in common than
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: any human being I've ever dreamed. Who loves the fold laundry?
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: Not me?
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: I know you don't, and it's annoying because you would
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: always prevent us from getting out faster outside because of
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: your You couldn't do it fast. You would just stare.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: At I can't stand it. I still can't stand it.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: I told her then, and in the same I told
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: her in that interview in today too. I have a
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: basket full of clothes sitting next to my my chester
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: doors that I haven't gotten to yet, and we would
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: You would come over and we couldn't go to the
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: swim club or to the you know, the local pool
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: to go swimming or any of that until I folded
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: those clothes. And I was like, I can't leave until
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: I fold clothes. And you would ride your bike over
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: just to fold the damn clothes in my house so
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: we could go out.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: I did. That?
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: Was it? That's true? Friend, that's true. Friend.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: Can you remember the last time, one of the last
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: times I came out to La to see you and
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: I was in your house.
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: And you probably folded my clothes.
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: I went into your bedroom and I said, oh, oh,
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: what is this? And I just started folding. I'm like
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: to handle it because I can't look at them like that.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: I got to fold them. And I the fluffy towel.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: She was talking about, the fluffy towel. I love the
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: full towels.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: Oh, next, you can go ahead and full clothes and
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: I'll just sit here and drink this prosecco and joy.
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: So cheers. Clean clink, clink, clink. How hard can it
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: be with.
• 10:09
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• 10:12
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• 10:16
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• 10:19
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