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Romeo In The Morning 9-17-26 · Romeo In The Morning

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: What's going on? It's Romeo and it's Thursday. We talked
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: a little bit about those flock cameras that are coming
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: around town. We also talked about the Kern County Fair,
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: the cost, and somebody was worried about the safety. I
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: don't know about that. We'll find out. And then we
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: got some relationship advice from Michael Bean for the Marriage
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: and Family Center. Let's get going. So yesterday, I go
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: out to grab some packages out at the front door, right?
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: And I look over and I see my neighbor in
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: his driveway, just sitting.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: In his car.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: And he doesn't see me. I don't know what he's doing.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: I'm looking at him for a minute, grabbing my package.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: I wasn't going to go say hi, but I thought, nah.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: How bad of a day do you have to have
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: to where you're just sitting in your car before you
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: go in the house? You know? Like, how rough did
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: it have to be to be in your driveway just
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: sitting in your car trying to figure out what's next? No,
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: I don't know what he was doing, but I was thinking, man, bruh.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: He must have had a rough day that you don't know.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: Or let me tell you this. This is another funny
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: thing I thought about when he was sitting there. And
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: I don't know why he was sitting there. I haven't
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: asked him. I will. Or he'll hear this right now
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: on his way to work. Or his wife will. And
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: I'll find out. But for those of you that don't know,
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: that before you could text your family at any given moment,
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: before you could communicate with them 24-7, you would come
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: home from work and you didn't know what was going
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: to happen. You didn't know what you were in for.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: You didn't know what the kids were doing, the wife,
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: the husband. You'd show up home, you'd pull into that driveway,
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: and we didn't all have cell phones. So you didn't
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: know what you were walking into. Now, I don't know
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: what he was walking into. Maybe something was going on
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: inside the house that he needed a moment, you know,
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: to collect his thoughts before he walked in. I don't know.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: But I'm just saying. I mean, how many of you
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: remember dad? I mean, a lot of you remember back
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: in the day when we were kids, you remember dad
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: having a cigarette before he came in the house. You
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: guys remember that, right? Your dad would get off work.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: He'd get out of his car and he'd just stand there,
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: have a smoke before he came into the house because
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: he didn't know what he was getting into. Maybe he
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: had a rough day at work. You just never know.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: I just thought it was the craziest thing. And I
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: don't know what he was doing. He didn't look like
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: he was talking to anybody on the phone or anything.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: He didn't look like he was wrapping up a conversation.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: I have no idea. I mean, I'm sure I'll find out, but...
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: What kind of day do you have to have? Or
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: what's going on inside that house that you just need
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: a moment to collect yourself in the car? R-D-4-2-5-4-7-7. Have
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: you ever done that? Have you ever gotten home and
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: just said, I need a minute. Let me just sit
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: in this car for a second or two or three
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: to collect my thoughts, to collect me as a person.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: Get my emotions straight before I go in this house
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: for whatever reason. So, yeah, I went out yesterday to
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: grab something off the front porch, got delivered. I look
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: over at my neighbor. He's just sitting in his car.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: I don't know what he's doing, just sitting there. And
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: I was thinking, man, how bad of a day. How
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: crazy did your day have to get to you just
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: got to sit in the car in the driveway for
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: a minute and collect yourself? Or what's going on inside?
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: That means you've got to prepare yourself to go inside.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: Who does that? R-D-4-2-5-4-7-7. I actually have no idea why
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: he was doing it. Good morning, Don. What's going on?
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: Good morning, Romeo.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: Hey, what's up?
• 4:09
  Speaker 4: So I'm a knock shift worker.
• 4:12
  Speaker 5: I just got off of work right now.
• 4:13
  Speaker 6: So when I get off of work, I sit in
• 4:16
  Speaker 6: my car.
• 4:16
  Speaker 7: In the morning.
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: For how long?
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: Maybe about 20 minutes, 20, 30 minutes.
• 4:21
  Speaker 7: Why?
• 4:24
  Speaker 8: I sit in my.
• 4:24
  Speaker 4: Car to listen.
• 4:30
  Speaker 6: To your bull * * * *.
• 4:31
  Speaker 7: I don't have a radio in my job. I'm a
• 4:37
  Speaker 7: noxious caregiver, so we don't have.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: Radios.
• 4:42
  Speaker 8: I catch up on my day before I go to bed.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: Gotcha. Well, that makes sense. That makes sense. Okay.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:48
  Speaker 6: Dude, try to collect my thoughts because I have two
• 4:51
  Speaker 6: boys at home.
• 4:52
  Speaker 5: That are boys.
• 4:53
  Speaker 4: So I'm like, if when I left, they better left
• 4:56
  Speaker 4: my house, I better come home to a clean house.
• 4:58
  Speaker 4: So that's nothing.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: All right. Well, thanks for calling. I appreciate it. Bye.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: That's just funny to me. I mean, I don't know. Hey, Rome,
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: I sit in my car after work, pound two tallies
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: and going after a long day.
• 5:16
  Speaker 6: Bye.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: That's my question. I get it. You have a long
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: day at the office. You need a couple tall boys
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: to get you through it. But why do you got
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: to pound them in the car? Why can't you go
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: into the house and pound them? It was just strange
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: to me. I don't know why. I don't know why
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: he was sitting in his car. But, I mean, nowadays,
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: you know what you're coming home to. Back in the day,
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: you didn't know what you were getting yourself into when
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: you got home. Whether the wife was mad, the husband
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: was upset, the kids were obnoxious. You had no idea
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: what you were coming home to. Nowadays, I guess you
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: know you're coming home to a fight because she's texting
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: you or he's texting you about what's this and what's that.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: So maybe that's what it is. I have no idea.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Just sitting in the car. So I go out to
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: get some packages. The front door, right? I look over
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: at my neighbor. He's just sitting in his car. Right
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: in the driveway. I'm thinking to myself, why is this
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: dude sitting in the car? What's going on? Rough day
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: at work. Got to get yourself together. I don't know.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: Maybe he knows that things are going chaotic inside the house,
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: so he needs to collect himself. I'm not sure. Why
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: are you sitting in the car?
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: R-D-4-2-5-4-7-7.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: Yo, Rome. The way I do it is I take
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: the long way home and catch every red light. So
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: when I get home, I'm ready to go in. Well,
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: I mean, that's a better way to do it. Instead
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: of just sitting in the car, sitting there in your driveway,
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: just trying to figure out what's next in life. You
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: know what? Is that what's going on? You're trying to
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: collect your thoughts and figure out where you went wrong today?
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: I mean, why are you sitting in the car? That's
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: what I do in your driveway. What is going on
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: in your life? R-A-4-2-5-4-7-7. Hey, Romeo. I got to tell
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: you a funny story about sitting in the car. Now,
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: we have cameras in our driveway and the ring cam.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: My husband came home, thought he was slick, went and
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: got some fast food, didn't bring any for nobody, and
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: we could watch him on the camera eating in the car.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: Me and the kids just watched it, and then when
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: he came in, I showed him the video. It was
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: so funny, Rome. He had to go back out and
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: get us all fast food just like he got. My
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: man got caught, huh? I had a friend of mine
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: did that. His wife doesn't like him eating hot dogs.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: So this fool pulls up to his driveway, gets out
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: of his car, right in front of the camera just
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: eating hot dogs. Man, she sent that video to everybody
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: he knew. Yeah. I still got the video on my phone.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: It's hilarious. But anyway, sitting in the car, man, how
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: bad does your day have to be? Or how messed
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: up do things have to be in your house that
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: you just need a moment to sit in the car?
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: So it's funny. I went out to grab some packages.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: You know, at the front porch, I look over at
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: my neighbor. He's just sitting in his car in the driveway.
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: I don't know what he's doing.
• 8:20
  Speaker 6: I thought, man.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: Why are you sitting in your car? What is going
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: on with your day that you need to sit there
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: and collect your thoughts? Good morning, Al. What's going on?
• 8:31
  Speaker 6: Hey, Romy.
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: I was calling about the whole sitting in the car thing.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what up, brother?
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: Well, you know, I work for UPS.
• 8:39
  Speaker 3: And I drive all day. So when I get home, honestly,
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: I just want to just sit there for a second, like,
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: let my mental... Just calm down. Cause I'm like, I'm
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: driving all day. I even got to drive home and
• 8:51
  Speaker 3: I don't want to take it out on nobody. You
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: know what I'm saying?
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Oh, I see what you're saying. You're doing this so
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: that you don't go into your family and, and okay.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: I see that. I get that makes sense, I guess.
• 9:03
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: Cause I know sometimes like, you know, everybody brings work
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: to home and I'm like, I'm not one of those people,
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: you know?
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: As a UPS driver, by the way, you buy yourself
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: all day. How can you have some mental instability that
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: you're going to take out on your family? You buy
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: yourself all day, bro.
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: Well, look, I'm going to tell you something.
• 9:25
  Speaker 3: Being a driver is almost like cartoonish because so much
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: things happen during the day. And I'm not saying take
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: it out on your family.
• 9:33
  Speaker 6: It's like I don't want to bring.
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: The energy to the family. I already talked to my
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: girl about what's going on, like the crazy drivers. But
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: I just want to bring positivity.
• 9:50
  Speaker 6: To my family.
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying? I don't want to just
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: bring it. Because, you know, family, kids, you got to
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: be the best version of yourself.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to argue with you, but all right. Okay.
• 9:59
  Speaker 6: All right.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: So how long do you sit in the car?
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm going to be honest with you. It depends
• 10:05
  Speaker 3: on what time.
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: I get off.
• 10:07
  Speaker 6: Like, if I get off at a decent.
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: Time, you know, probably five minutes.
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: But if I'm out here until 9 o'clock.
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: I don't know, it'll take like 20 minutes just to
• 10:15
  Speaker 3: get it off me. It's tiring out here.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's awesome.
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: A lot of people be ordering around the same time, summertime,
• 10:25
  Speaker 3: waiting to bench, and I'm like, you know what?
• 10:27
  Speaker 6: Y'all ordering all this stuff, and it's going to be
• 10:30
  Speaker 6: clothes on their.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: in the next few weeks.
• 10:34
  Speaker 6: But, you know, hey.
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's hilarious. Well, good. All right, man. Just take
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: you a little, collect your thoughts before you go in
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: the house.
• 10:42
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: All right, man. Thanks for calling. No problem. That makes sense, right?
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: What's going on?
• 10:50
  Speaker 6: I agree with the Romeo. I work for a repo company.
• 10:53
  Speaker 6: Sometimes you just got to sit there because people just
• 10:56
  Speaker 6: mess your day up because they're mad you didn't pay
• 10:58
  Speaker 6: their car note.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: Ha ha.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: So what, man? So people be mad at what you're doing,
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: and you just get home, sit in the car for
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: a minute before you go in the house?
• 11:11
  Speaker 6: I take a deep breath. That way I can exhale
• 11:14
  Speaker 6: and let all of the craziness out. You just got
• 11:18
  Speaker 6: to let it out, bro. Just take a deep breath
• 11:21
  Speaker 6: and go, okay, I'm going in the house. Let me
• 11:22
  Speaker 6: see what the wife wants. I don't want to give
• 11:24
  Speaker 6: her the bad news that somebody didn't pay their car
• 11:26
  Speaker 6: note and they screamed at me today.
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's hilarious. Okay. All right. All right, man. Thanks
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: for calling. That is hilarious to me. Hey, Rome, gas
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: is too expensive to just be sitting in the car.
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: That's what you got the drive home from work for,
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: to think about your day, not just sitting in the
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: driveway wasting gas. Who cares about that? I just wonder... Man,
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: what kind of day do you have to have to
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: when you come home? There's only two things that it
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: could be, right? Sitting in the car. You had a
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: day and you need to collect your thoughts. Or you
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: got a household that you just don't want to walk into.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: So you need a moment before you can handle that insanity.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: Good morning. What's going on?
• 12:19
  Speaker 8: Yo, Rome.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: What up, man?
• 12:22
  Speaker 8: You know what? There's only two places where a man
• 12:25
  Speaker 8: can really think and come up with either great ideas
• 12:29
  Speaker 8: or great inventions. And sitting down in the driveway in
• 12:33
  Speaker 8: your car or sitting on.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: Your toilet, my man.
• 12:38
  Speaker 8: My man was probably thinking about some great, you know,
• 12:41
  Speaker 8: what's my next move? You know what I mean?
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: Maybe.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: I have no idea.
• 12:45
  Speaker 8: Let me just tell you, do you think Alexander Hamilton
• 12:47
  Speaker 8: didn't sit in the toilet and thought about writing the Constitution,
• 12:52
  Speaker 8: my man?
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: Okay, wow. All right.
• 12:57
  Speaker 8: I'm telling you, Gabe.
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: Okay, fair enough.
• 13:00
  Speaker 8: Go to the driveway or go to the toilet.
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: Great ideas, my man.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: All right, later. My man was, so you're telling me
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: my neighbor was trying to figure out how to cure cancer, huh?
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: While he was sitting in the driveway after work. Before
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: he went into his house? Is that what was going on?
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: I don't. I don't think I've ever sat in my
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: car after getting home. And, yeah. I don't know. I
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: guess you guys do it. You just sit in the
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: car after work, in the driveway, collect yourself before you
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: go in. Wednesday? Is that what I'm hearing? The bear
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: starts Wednesday or Thursday? When does it start? I think
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: it's Wednesday. I'm not positive, though. What did you send me?
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: You sent me a text message saying, Hey Rome, what
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: do you think about the current County fair with prices
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: for bracelets, et cetera, and the safety since a lot
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: of teens go in groups unsupervised. Um, what are the,
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: how much are the prices of the wristbands? What is
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: the problem with the prices of the wristbands? I mean,
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: everything's kind of expensive. I don't know what, uh, I
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: don't know what you want me to say about it.
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: I don't, uh, I don't know what, one, I don't
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: know what the prices of the wristbands are, so I
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: can't really comment. Are they too expensive? What are they probably?
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: They're probably, what, $ 35, $ 40 for a wristband? I mean,
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: that's unlimited rides, right? As long as you go on
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: enough rides, I think it's worth it. A lot of
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: guys complain about the cost of things. Well, I mean, unfortunately,
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: life costs money, and I understand that. I don't know
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: what to tell you, man. You got a few kids.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: It's going to cost you. You know what? I don't
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: know how much a wristband is. So you got to
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: take your kids, and you got to get the unlimited
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: rides because then they could stay there for a few
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: hours and ride all the rides. Is it worth it? Probably.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: I mean, I know it's expensive, but it's probably worth
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: the couple of hours of fun for your kids. You know,
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: somebody's going to have to tell me the price, though,
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: before I can. I mean, it costs money, man. If
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: you can't afford it, I get it. But, you know,
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: everything's expensive nowadays. And I don't know what you want
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: me to tell you. I'm not going to sit there
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: and say that, well, the only thing that I believe
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: that we're being ripped off from is gas prices. I
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: think these gas stations are using their ability to raise
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: their prices just to take advantage and be ingredient and monopolistic. Monopolistic,
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: that's not the right word to use, but They're being,
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: that's the only thing I think they're overcharging. Now, things
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: are expensive. I get it. But I don't know what
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: to tell you. I just, there's no way around it.
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: Figure it out or don't go. I mean, that's just
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: your only option. As far as, what was the other
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: thing you asked me? As far as the safety, a
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: lot of teens go in groups unsupervised. Has there been
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: a lot of problems at the fair? Has the fair
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: been unsafe in the last few years? I mean, I
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: don't know. I haven't, I don't think I went, I
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: went to the fair last year, but I went for a, uh,
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: a contest and I w I didn't stay. Did I stay?
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: Maybe I did stay and hang out. I didn't see
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: no problems, but I don't know. Who's the response. See, here's,
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: here's the problem though. Here's, here's where you come down
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: to a real problem when it comes to safety of teens. Um,
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: at what point do you start holding parents accountable? You know,
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: You send your kids off, and maybe some of you
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: won't like this, but if you send your kids off
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: somewhere to do something, you want to be safe, right?
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: But aren't you also the person who is ultimately responsible
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: for the safety of your children as you? You know,
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: you can't, I know you got the cops out there
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: doing the best they can, but are they ultimately responsible
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: for the safety of your children? Maybe, you know, maybe,
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: I don't know, you know. But if you parents are
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: just going to drop off your kids and pull out,
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: then what liability do you have for what your kids do?
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: Because it works both ways. It really works both ways.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: Your kids could be there and get caught up in
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: something that they had nothing to do with, or your
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: kids could be the ones starting something, starting the problem.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: So where's the accountability to the parents from either perspective?
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: You should be there watching your kids, you know, making
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: sure they're safe. So I don't know, though.
• 17:59
  Speaker 9: I don't know.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: Everybody has a different opinion on that, but.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: You know, I got to go with my mom's opinion
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: or my dad's opinion. My ultimate safety is on them
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: and always has been, you know. Well, now that I'm
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: an adult, it wasn't. But as a kid, my mom
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: and dad took me everywhere and watched me. So I
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: don't know. So the fair starts. And somebody was asking
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: what I thought about the prices of the bracelets, the
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: all-you-can-ride bracelets, and the charity for the teens. I don't.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: Let me see here. Uh, big boy says I bought
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: my tickets for eight bucks each and wristbands for $ 35
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: each and parking pass for $ 10 last month. I hear
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: it's doubled at the gate. So it's, uh, $ 16 to
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: get in the fair. And then what? $ 70 for a wristband.
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: Is that, uh, and $ 20 for parking. If everything's doubled,
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: is that what you're saying? $ 70 for a wristband might
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: be a little excessive. I mean, $ 8 to get in,
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: $ 35 wristbands. That doesn't seem too excessive to me for
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: the fair. Damn, Rome, how much more safety do they
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: really need? Lots of law enforcement, metal detectors at all entrances.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: I go every year several times, have never had an issue. Well, yeah,
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: I don't, yeah, I don't, I think the cops do
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: a pretty good job at the fair, actually. I don't,
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: I don't, I think you're right. I don't think I've
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: heard of a lot of issues. Yeah, I don't know.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: I don't know why this person was asking me that.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I guess, I mean, a lot of people get bad
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: information as well, and they just want to pass it
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: on like it's fact, but I don't know. I really honestly,
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I went to the fair. I think
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: a couple of times last year I didn't see any
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: problems I even talked to a couple of cops they
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: didn't seem to act like it was there was anything
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: out of the ordinary going on so anyway hey Romeo
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: about the fair there's always issues at the fair I
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: believe last year somebody stabbed or shot That's why they've
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: been increasing security. Last year, whatever that situation was, and
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: we may be talking about two different situations, but I
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: remember asking a cop, there was a gun or something
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: outside the fair. Something happened outside the fair gates, not
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: inside the fair gates. And he was telling me about it,
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: that it wasn't that big of a deal. Somebody had
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: a gun. They got it. Nothing happened. Security was there.
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: The cops were there. So I don't know if we're
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: talking about two different issues. But also the problem is
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: you guys hear so many lies on social media that
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: you don't know what's real and what's not. You know,
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: like I was, what was I? I was something about
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: one of these basketball players. These WNBA basketball players lost
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: their shoe contract because of something they did. And it
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: was all over social media. Oh, they lost their shoe contract.
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: So I went and looked it up. No, they didn't
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: lose their shoe contract, but they put false AI information
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: out there. And then all of a sudden you believe
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: it because you guys don't go actually look for the
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: real information. I mean, I remember there being a gun
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: issue at the fair last year. And when I was there,
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: I asked the cop, hey, what happened with this gun issue?
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: Are we safe to be here? Absolutely. They weren't worried
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: about none. Told me the whole story. was outside, and
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: so I don't know. Maybe there was something that happened.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Stuff happens. You know, is it unsafe
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: to go anywhere? I was down at the Grito on,
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: what was it, Tuesday night downtown at the Hispanic Chamber
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: of Commerce event, and it was amazing. I didn't feel
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: unsafe at all. Cops were everywhere, blocking off, protecting. I
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: didn't feel unsafe at all. So I don't know what,
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: I don't know. You guys get too much. The problem
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: is you're not capable of handling all the information. As
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: human beings, we're not capable of handling all of the
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: information that you can consume every single day within seconds
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: and minutes on the internet or on social media. You're
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: not capable to deal with it. And then you get
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: stuck in these algorithms that only show you The negative
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: thing that you're looking at, and then you think that's
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: all that's happening in the world is negative, negative, negative, negative, negative.
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: When in reality, that's not all that's happening in the world.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: If you watched the dog videos, and all you got
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: was dog videos, then you'd see your perception of the
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: world would be all dog videos. That's the problem. And
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: you don't know what's real and what's not real. So,
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: is the fair unsafe? I don't believe it. I mean,
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: things happen. You don't think people have been fighting at
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: the fair before social media? You don't think people, 25
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: years ago, you don't think people were fighting at the fair? Yeah.
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: 30 years ago, you don't think people were getting drunk
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: and fighting at the fair? You think the fairs, I mean,
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: come on now. And big boy just told me they
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: got metal detectors. They got cops. I mean, the cops
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: do a great job walking around. So, I don't know.
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know what you believe is
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: real or not.
• 23:39
  Speaker 6: Rome.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: What up, man?
• 23:41
  Speaker 9: Hey, hook me up with some tickets to the fair
• 23:43
  Speaker 9: and I'll tell you how safe it is.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: I don't have any fair tickets. Come on, man. I
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: don't have fair tickets.
• 23:50
  Speaker 6: Come on, Rome.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: When's the fair next week? Yeah, the fair don't start
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: until next week. Maybe I'll have some next week. I
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: don't have any this week.
• 23:56
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: Sorry, brother.
• 23:59
  Speaker 6: I'll get it.
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: And it's safe. The fare's safe. Come on. Yo, Rome,
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: you can still go online right now and pre-purchase your
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: tickets for a good deal. I know there's a convenience
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: fee now, like two extra dollars for each item. Something
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: like that. Let me see what I got. What big
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: boy sent me here. Let's see. Fare admission. You can
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: buy fare admission right now online. Discount admission. One day.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: 15 at the gate. It's 11 right now for adults.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: What else did he send me here? Hold on. Four
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: pack admission. Four adult admission tickets valid one day. Okay,
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: carnival wristbands. Regularly $ 48. You can get them for $ 38
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: right now if you go online and buy them. That's
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: not bad. I mean, under $ 40 is not bad. I mean,
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: that's just the cost of doing business. That's just what
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: stuff costs nowadays. You guys got to stop being... You
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: just got to deal with it, man. Just deal with it.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: Stop complaining about it and just deal with it. All right. R-A-4-2-5-4-7-7.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: There's a lot of things that I don't get to
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: do because I can't afford it. Should I come on
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: the radio every day and cry about it? I can't
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: do this or I can't do that because I don't
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: have the kind of money to do that stuff. I mean,
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: come on.
• 25:22
  Speaker 7: Romeo, it's funny because last night I got a call
• 25:25
  Speaker 7: from the fair. And Raider Dave got two dates there.
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: So tell him, keep listening. Raider Dave will give him
• 25:31
  Speaker 4: some tickets.
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: Okay. I'll tell him.
• 25:34
  Speaker 7: Tell him.
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: Bye.
• 25:35
  Speaker 6: Bye.
• 25:36
  Speaker 7: Later.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: There you go. You know, Raider Dave, you can get
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: into the fair. Hey, Rome, you were talking about the
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: Kern County Fair. You know it's not safe to go
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: to that place, the fairgrounds. It's just not a good
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: place to go. Well, is it really? Is it really
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: not that safe? I mean, come on now. You know
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: what's funny? It's funny because I listen to you guys
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: talk about things. The fair's not safe or things aren't
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: safe to go to. I don't go out because of
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: this and that. But yet, I hear all you guys
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: complaining about these flock cameras. What are these flock cameras?
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: I don't know where they're at. Apparently, we have some
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: in Bakersfield. I know they've been complaining about them a lot.
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: I think they just put them on a couple of
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: college campuses down south. And all the students were complaining,
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: the people were complaining about these flock cameras. You know, oh,
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: it's a, what do they call it, a tyranny state,
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: or they call it a overwatch, or somebody's watching us,
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: we don't need all that. But they're for safety. I mean,
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: these cameras they put around town are to catch people
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: doing dirt. I think in Texas, I was reading a story,
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: this happened a few months ago where my sister lives
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: out in Austin. that somebody got shot somebody or something.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: They caught the people because of these flock cameras. They
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: saw the car. They took off running. They followed the
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: flock cameras until they found them. But you guys are
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: all worried that, what, the government's watching you? What I
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: can't believe, this is what I can't believe about these
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: flock cameras. And I was having a conversation with a
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: friend of mine about them the other day. He says, yeah, man,
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: they're great for safety. If you're not doing anything wrong,
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: what do you care if there's cameras recording everything? Well,
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: we don't want people watching us. It's privacy. It's not
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: the stupidity. And this is just straight up how stupid
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: you are. Unless you can give me a more legitimate reason,
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: this is how stupid you are. You walk around every
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: single day with a tracking device in your hand that
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: can listen to you, that watches you. You have people
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: recording every single day Everybody's walking around with a camera
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: and a recording device, and you people are worried about
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: a camera. Oh, the cops are going to be watching. Oh,
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: the government's going to be watching. You're already being watched
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: every single day of your life, 24 hours a day.
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: Right now, you're being tracked, watched, and everybody knows everything
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: about you because of your damn phone. But you're too
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: stupid to go, well, wait a second. This is great.
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: But a flock camera? No, we can't have those. I
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: just don't understand what kind of stupid you are. I
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: really don't. And, yeah. So these cameras they're putting up around,
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: they've got these things called flock cameras, right? And I
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: wanted to talk about them because I saw people are
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: upset about it. Oh my God, the government's putting in,
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: the city's putting in cameras, the cops are putting in cameras.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: We're losing our privacy. We're going to be victims of whatever, right? Well,
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: how are you losing your privacy in public, first of all?
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: And you don't want the government watching you when you're
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: out publicly because what? What do you think? You don't care.
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: You don't want the city protecting the city with cameras
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: at intersections, but you're okay with Apple knowing everything you do.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: You're okay with Jeff Bezos having access to every single
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: piece of information you got. You're okay with China knowing
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: your credit card numbers and all this other stuff. You're
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: okay with your phones listening to you in your house,
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: but you're mad that the city... wants to have these
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: cameras to help keep the city safer, to help keep
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: people safer, right? Do you see the stupidity in that?
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: Or am I the only one that sees the stupidity
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: in that? I'm just saying. Good morning, how's it going?
• 29:40
  Speaker 7: On? Good morning, Romeo.
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: Hey, what's up?
• 29:43
  Speaker 8: So you're talking about being watched? Yeah.
• 29:45
  Speaker 10: I could really care less.
• 29:47
  Speaker 7: The only thing I can say that I do not
• 29:49
  Speaker 7: want to happen with being watched or recorded or anything
• 29:53
  Speaker 7: is end up on Kern County Activities.
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: That is the only thing.
• 29:59
  Speaker 5: I don't care.
• 30:00
  Speaker 7: Record me everywhere else, just not on that Kern County Activities.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: Kern County Activities isn't all bad. I mean, they have
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: some funny stuff on there, too.
• 30:08
  Speaker 8: They do, but come on now.
• 30:10
  Speaker 7: You minding your business, doing something in your car, and
• 30:13
  Speaker 7: you get put on Kern County Activities? Yeah, I'm good.
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: Well, what are you doing minding your business in your
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: car publicly that would warrant you getting put on Kern
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: County Activities?
• 30:23
  Speaker 6: Hey.
• 30:24
  Speaker 4: What I do in the privacy of my car?
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: Technically, it's not the privacy of your car.
• 30:31
  Speaker 8: Who I'm in my car with, that's my business.
• 30:35
  Speaker 7: That's my business.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: Yo, Rome, people are stupid. You guys are worried about
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: the government watching you or tracking you, right? You pretty
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: much have a tracking device on you every day. Right now,
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: you're being tracked. Right now, you're being listened to in
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: your own home. Yet you're worried about them putting up
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: some cameras at intersections so they can catch criminals or
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: dirt that's going on in our city, trying to make
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: our city safer. And you over here acting like you
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: lose in privacy because when you cross Ming and Ash
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: and there's a camera there that you guys somehow you've
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: lost your privacy. Really? Considering your phone is monitoring everything
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: you do right now? I mean, what kind of stupid
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: do you guys have to be to not understand that? Right.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: Let's see. Hey, Rome. What's up, Rome? Headbutt Raider checking in.
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: I just got hit by a mosquito. Hope them dang
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: flock cameras catch this little guy. It really hurt. Go Raider. Yeah,
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: I think this argument about these flock cameras that you
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: guys are dealing with, you guys are stupid because they're
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: not putting them in your house. They're putting them in
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: public to catch public stuff, okay? To stop criminals, to
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: stop crime, to help make the city safer. They're not using...
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: How could you use these flock cameras that they're putting
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: on the streets? How can they use them to intrude
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: on your privacy? I don't understand that. And obviously, any
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: of you out there who are saying they're bad... doesn't
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: understand it either maybe you should just stop talking you
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: know all right especially since these iphones are i mean
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: what are you thinking oh my god i just can't
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: sometimes Sometimes you just can't with the stupidity. You just
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: got to stop.
• 32:48
  Speaker 9: Hey, I'm just listening about the flock cameras.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what about it?
• 32:50
  Speaker 9: You heard instances where the police themselves have used it
• 32:55
  Speaker 9: to track ex-girlfriends and boyfriends to do stuff like that.
• 32:59
  Speaker 9: There's already been cases of that. And I hear the
• 33:03
  Speaker 9: good stuff, too, but there's some negative stuff, too, where...
• 33:06
  Speaker 9: Any agency can tap into it and then also, like,
• 33:10
  Speaker 9: trace someone, like, look at patterns to.
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: Pull people over that haven't even committed crimes.
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: You don't think that's already happening?
• 33:17
  Speaker 9: No, I know with the phones, but, like, you're just
• 33:19
  Speaker 9: giving them more. Isn't it like a slippery slope?
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: No, not even close. More good will happen. You got
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: idiots over here going to Facebook and things like that
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: or social medias to track anyways in all different aspects.
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: My phone tells me how long. When I get out
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: of here at 10 o'clock, my phone says, it is
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: 16 minutes for you to get home. How the hell
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: does it know I'm going home? Because it's tracking your patterns.
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: It's already out there. So, no.
• 33:49
  Speaker 9: What about people that are not on the phone? So,
• 33:52
  Speaker 9: you're just assuming everyone has a phone.
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: Everyone's on a phone.
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: Not everyone, but I just think it's a slippery slope.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: Name one person.
• 34:01
  Speaker 9: The old people whose houses I go to.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: Everyone's on the phone.
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: Mainly old people.
• 34:05
  Speaker 9: I guess they're not going to be around that much longer.
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: Everyone's out. Get out of here. I mean, you guys
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: look at one instance. You know what's funny about that?
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: What he just said? I'm going to tell you what's
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: funny about what he just said. He said there's an
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: instance of a cop using a flock camera to stalk
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: his ex or whoever, right? But do you know how
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: bad these phones are? Do you know how, you guys
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: know how mentally debilitating these phones are to these kids?
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: And kids are committing suicide because of these phones and
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: the things that are happening and the access and the
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: bullying and all of these other mental issues that you
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: have because of a phone. Documented mental, documented just health
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: risks that these phones cause you with their algorithms. And yet,
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: nobody cares. Yet, you're going to call me and go, well,
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: a cop stalked his ex because he could access a
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: flock camera. But yet, all of the things, didn't Facebook
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: just lose a case because a kid killed himself or
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: something like that? They don't care about that. You don't
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: care about what's going on with society and what these
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: phones are doing to your mental health. But you care
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: about a cop who stalked his ex using a flock camera.
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: You think a cop can't use his computer in his
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: car to find his ex if he wanted to? Come
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: on now. You guys really are stupid. I mean, you
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: really are stupid. It just amazes me how you pick
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: and choose what you like and don't like, even though
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: these phones are way worse than these cameras. But you
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: don't care. Because you're addicted. And you're stupid. Flock cameras,
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: people are against them, right? Oh, they're taking away our privacy.
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: You don't have much privacy in public to begin with.
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: But yet you're not concerned about your phone. Some girl
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: just said she just didn't want to be on Kern
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: County Activities. Hey, Rome, Kern County Activities posted cheaters in
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: their vehicles. Is she a cheater? Exactly. What are you
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: doing in your vehicle? You know how you don't end
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: up on Kern County Activities in your car? Cheating? Don't cheat. Hey, Ron,
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: I was talking to my brother-in-law last night about I've
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: been drinking too much lately, and now in the morning
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: I'm getting ads on Facebook about alcoholic centers to get help. Well,
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: there you go. That's my point. You idiots are worried
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: about a camera at an intersection or a camera around
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: town to help keep you safer or us safer, but
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: yet your phone is listening to you every single day
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: in the privacy of your own home, and you don't
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: care about that. Make that make sense.
• 37:14
  Speaker 7: Good morning, Al.
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: What's going on?
• 37:16
  Speaker 8: Romeo, this is Romeo.
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: Stop it.
• 37:18
  Speaker 8: Hey, what's going on?
• 37:20
  Speaker 9: I heard you talking about the flat cams, but I
• 37:22
  Speaker 9: really don't care about the cams. I don't care about
• 37:25
  Speaker 9: being on camera, but can I do a real quick
• 37:26
  Speaker 9: birthday shout-out?
• 37:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah, hurry up.
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: Happy birthday to my husband, Junior.
• 37:32
  Speaker 3: Happy birthday, baby.
• 37:33
  Speaker 8: We're off to Vegas, baby.
• 37:34
  Speaker 5: To the Supercar Show.
• 37:36
  Speaker 8: He's right next to me.
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: Happy birthday, babe.
• 37:38
  Speaker 8: I love you.
• 37:39
  Speaker 9: Say hi to Romeo.
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: What's up, Romeo? Didn't you just call for a birthday
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: shout-out with him? This fool has a birthday every other week.
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: My goodness. No, he doesn't.
• 37:50
  Speaker 8: It's less than a year. We have a bunch of kids.
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: That's why I do a bunch of birthday shout-outs.
• 37:55
  Speaker 8: But we're going to Vegas for his birthday baby weekend.
• 37:57
  Speaker 9: Here we come.
• 37:59
  Speaker 8: Happy birthday to the love of my life.
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: All right, get out of here. Good morning, y'all. What's
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: going on?
• 38:03
  Speaker 10: I really don't care about the flat cameras unless they catch.
• 38:07
  Speaker 9: Me riding dirty.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: My tags are expired right now, so as long as
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: they don't catch that, I'm cool with them.
• 38:22
  Speaker 8: I got no problem.
• 38:24
  Speaker 4: What's up, Romeo?
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: What up, man? What up, man?
• 38:28
  Speaker 10: About these camera things that they got going on yeah
• 38:32
  Speaker 10: it's all it's all fun and games until until they're
• 38:34
  Speaker 10: driving down the road and they get smacked by a
• 38:36
  Speaker 10: car and the insurance is trying to say it's their
• 38:38
  Speaker 10: fault and then they're going to be crying for these
• 38:40
  Speaker 10: cameras or somebody somebody's kid gets kidnapped and then that's
• 38:44
  Speaker 10: the last place that they've seen them there you know
• 38:46
  Speaker 10: i mean like they're gonna need these cameras.
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: There You know, you're right. And that's why people are stupid,
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: because it's all fun and games. Like you said, you
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: want to put your whole life out on the Internet
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: to become sort of social celebrity. And then you get
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: mad when it doesn't work out for you. And now
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: you're a victim. Well, keep your ass off the Internet.
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: I mean, people are just the idea is so ridiculous
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: to think that these cameras are not here to help
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: people help our side, our city be safer.
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
• 39:16
  Speaker 10: Just like, you know, somebody just kidnapped a kid and
• 39:18
  Speaker 10: that's it. They got the car, the make, and the model,
• 39:20
  Speaker 10: and they got the license plate. Now they got the
• 39:21
  Speaker 10: identity of the person.
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: And they can follow each camera to see where he goes,
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: he or she goes, or wherever. There you go.
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: Made it left, made it right.
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: There we go. Exactly. All right, man. All right, brother. Later, man.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: At least somebody gets it. At least somebody gets it.
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: Let's see.
• 39:37
  Speaker 6: R-8-4-2-5-4-7-7.
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: Romeo, would you send me here? Good morning, Rome. People
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: always saying to improve our safety, how Bakersfield's so dangerous.
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: Law enforcement doesn't make it safer in a sense, yes,
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: but it won't stop crime. Camera's evidence will slow down crimes.
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: We will have faster, accurate, and solid investigations. Kern County
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: has too many unsolved murders and hit and runs. Cameras
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: will reduce that and more. Wake up, people. All people
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: see is cameras in public, and they say because the
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: government's putting them up or because the cops are putting
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: them up, all of a sudden they want some sort
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: of overwatch. That's all they see, negativity towards the cameras
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: because of who's doing it. But yet you have no
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: problem putting yourself out there and buying an iPhone and
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: putting all your business on the streets for the world
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: to see. You have no business, your phone tracking you.
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: You think the government's not tracking you through your phone
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: right now? You think they're not listening to what you're
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: saying to Alexa in your house or in your, come
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: on now. You guys can't be that, well, maybe you
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: are that stupid. Cameras everybody's upset about, right? Why are
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: you upset about them? Good morning, how's it going on?
• 40:59
  Speaker 6: Hey, what's up, Will?
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: Hey, Ruben, what up, man?
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: Man, I got a boy be tripping. He's like, dude,
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: you need to stop going to Home Depot. You see
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: all the cameras they have? As soon as you pull in,
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: they're tracking you. And I go, bro, you really being
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: tracked by your wife all the time? I said, what
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: are you worried about? And he's like, nah, dude, I
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: got my whole phone on lock, nothing in there. You
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: know what I mean? And then, you know, he's like stressing.
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: He's like, dude, they're doing background checks. And I'm like, bro,
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: so what do you got to worry about, dude? Like,
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: this guy's never got a ticket in his whole life. Bro,
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: I've never been in trouble. And he's stressing out worse
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: than people that have been caught up in stuff. And
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: I'm like, dude, you're being tracked all the time. I
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: go everywhere you go. I go, why are you stressing?
• 41:36
  Speaker 6: What do you got?
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: What do you do? Is it that bad that you're
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: so worried that don't go to Home Depot no more.
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: Go to True Value because they don't have cameras. You
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: know what I mean, bro? I'm like, these people have
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: got some issues, bro. You know what I mean? You
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: really got to sit down. If you're stressing on that, bro,
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: then you need to get rid of your phone. You
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: need to quit walking down the street because everybody's ring
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: doorbells are recording you when you're walking by.
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's everywhere, dude.
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: Either get used to it or just stay locked up
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: at home.
• 42:07
  Speaker 7: All right.
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: All right, bro. Later, man. Yeah, that's exactly what you
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: got to do.
• 42:11
  Speaker 6: You're right.
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: You're being tracked every second of every day right now.
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: You're being tracked right now, by the way. All of you.
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: Stop being stupid. Hey, Rome, didn't you know that all
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: these police forces are being investigated and prosecuted for illegally
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: using the flock cameras? So there are safeguards in place
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: for the cameras. So quit being paranoid, my people. Damn,
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: I'm not even paranoid. Well, yeah, big boy should be paranoid.
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: What's going on?
• 42:33
  Speaker 8: They need these cameras because all these stupid motherfuckers be
• 42:37
  Speaker 8: on those bikes trying to play chicken.
• 42:39
  Speaker 4: That way their mom and dad can.
• 42:40
  Speaker 10: See them when they get run over.
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: Oh, God. First of all, don't cuss and calm down.
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: But okay. But okay, I'm with you. And that, yes,
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: they need the cameras to catch criminals or to catch stupidity.
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: You're right.
• 43:00
  Speaker 8: Oh, my mijo was so good. He was an amazing citizen.
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: He did this.
• 43:05
  Speaker 6: Back then, mijo was.
• 43:06
  Speaker 8: On his bike playing chicken with me.
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: Sounds like you need a Xanax.
• 43:14
  Speaker 7: No, I just need a drink.
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 43:16
  Speaker 4: No, because I was going down the street over there
• 43:20
  Speaker 4: on South K, and there was kids on the bike,
• 43:23
  Speaker 4: and so they started coming towards me.
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: I don't stop. I don't stop. Hold on. Okay, okay.
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: All right. Don't kill a kid, okay? I understand they're stupid,
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: but don't kill a kid, okay?
• 43:38
  Speaker 5: I'll run his ass over.
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. Get out of here. And that's what
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: the flock camera is for, to decide who was right
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: and wrong, right? Oh, my God. All right.
• 43:49
  Speaker 2: 8-4-2-5-4-7-7.
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: Hey, good morning, Romeo. I agree with you. If someone
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: wants to stalk their ex, they're going to find a way.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: The flock cameras aren't the reason they're able to stalk.
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: So many other means. Same with phones, social media, though.
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: It's not the phones or social media doing the bullying.
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: It's the people on the other side. Yeah, you're right.
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: But the problem is, here's the problem. You know, we
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: all grew up. We grew up old school, right? You
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: had to see your bully at school every day, right?
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: You remember that. And she'd normally take your lunch money.
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: But what I'm saying is you're so addicted to it
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: that you can't walk away from it. You know, none
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: of us said, you know what? Hey, let's stay after
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: school so we can be bullied some more and see
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: what happens, right? We would just go home, cry to
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: our mom or something, right? Go home and nothing would
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: be going on at home. But these phones are so addictive.
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: that you don't even understand or you don't want to
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: understand how horrible they are for you, for your mental health.
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: They're just horrible. But a flock camera, we can't have
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: flock cameras. We can't have cameras in the streets so
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: that people can see what happened and we can catch criminals. No.
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: But you, yeah, we can't have that. But you morons
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: will walk around with that phone being tracked, monitored, listened to, bullied.
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: Your mental health is deteriorating because of the addiction you
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: have towards it. You're becoming stupider and dumber. But that's
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: perfectly fine. But no, we don't want a camera on
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: Oak in California. They might see us, what, drive through
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: the intersection? Romeo.
• 45:46
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 45:47
  Speaker 4: Child and dumb asses. If they're scared to do the time,
• 45:50
  Speaker 4: don't do the crime. Anybody that objects to those flocking
• 45:55
  Speaker 4: cameras is doing shady, you know, shady business. And that's
• 46:01
  Speaker 4: coming from a Raider fan. I have no problem with
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: those flocking cameras. You know, there was a time when
• 46:08
  Speaker 4: there was no snitching.
• 46:09
  Speaker 7: Oh, you couldn't tell.
• 46:11
  Speaker 5: But these kids are out of hand. You know, there's
• 46:13
  Speaker 5: a strict policy where you don't hurt children, women, or
• 46:17
  Speaker 5: old people. So I think these cameras may, um, help
• 46:21
  Speaker 5: solve some of these, um, the crime around town without
• 46:26
  Speaker 5: anybody snitching.
• 46:26
  Speaker 4: So I I'm for him.
• 46:28
  Speaker 7: I don't think it's bad idea.
• 46:29
  Speaker 6: All right. Later.
• 46:31
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: Four, two, five, four, seven, seven. Hey, good morning, Rome.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: I agree with you. If someone wants to stalk their ex,
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: they're going to find, Oh, I already seen that. Uh,
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: I already seen that one. Uh, let's see. Good morning, Rome.
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to say a shout out to you.
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: I've been, Listening to you since I was in fifth grade.
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: I'm 32 now, and I don't remember you ever missing work. Yeah,
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: I don't miss work. What did you send me here? Hey,
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: good morning, Rome. This is a media page. It covers
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: the Central Valley, but lately it's been Kern County. I'm
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: good friends with the Dad's Gone Live and Kern County Activities.
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: We ain't here to make Bakersfield safe. We're here to shame,
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: dump people who drive drunk and cause accidents. Sincerely, Central
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: Valley Crime Streams.
• 47:19
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think that... I don't think... Yeah, okay. Hey, Rome,
• 47:29
  Speaker 1: before I left my house for work this morning, my
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: phone sent me an alert to choose an alternate route
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: for traffic collisions. It was actually right. It was actually right,
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: a deadly collision on the 204. I mean, that's what
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: I'm saying. Your phones are telling you, when I get
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: off work today, my phone will tell me I'm going
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: home and how long it's going to take me. So
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: to think that flock cameras are the downfall of society
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: and not your cell phone, you're an absolute moron.
• 47:57
  Speaker 6: Okay?
• 47:59
  Speaker 1: And the bad part is you choose. to put your
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: business out publicly, and then get mad when it doesn't
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: work out for you. Yo, Rome, free angel. We'd love
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: that wild. I would love what wild camera stories he's
• 48:16
  Speaker 1: got about his batty neighbors. Yeah. Poor angel. Poor angel.
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: I wonder if the flock cameras got angel caught up. Yeah,
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: poor angel. Michael Bean is here for the Marriage and
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: Family Center. Marriage and Family Center is where his place is, 661-327-5100.
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: Good morning, Michael.
• 48:37
  Speaker 7: Well, good morning. It's a living breeze. It's Romeo in
• 48:42
  Speaker 7: the morning.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: I get to talk to him. That's fantastic.
• 48:45
  Speaker 7: I know.
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: Things get... Crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy.
• 48:49
  Speaker 7: Well, and you never cease to make me think. I'm always,
• 48:53
  Speaker 7: when we have our chats on a Thursday morning, I
• 48:56
  Speaker 7: always just go, wow, that really gives me something to
• 48:59
  Speaker 7: think about.
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: Well, because I think, and it's going to sound really
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: weird coming from me, but I think your heart's in
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: the right place, Michael. I think you really care about
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: helping people, and I think you're on the right track
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: on how to do it. I just think people are
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: too stupid to listen. But, I mean... people are stupid,
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: and they don't want to admit it. Look at how
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: dumb we've gotten as a society over the years. But anyway, nevertheless, Michael,
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: you're still going to keep trying. Like fairness. I want
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: to talk about this idea of fairness. You want to
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: talk about this idea of fairness in a relationship.
• 49:38
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: Keeping score in a relationship is probably not the best
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: way to live a relationship. If you're always trying to say, well,
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: you got to do that, so I'm going to do this,
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: when you're only doing it because you feel like you've
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: been slighted, like the relationship's not fair or equal or
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: whatever the case may be, whatever term you put it in,
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: I think people who do that are really... are hurting
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: their relationships.
• 50:10
  Speaker 10: Well, right.
• 50:11
  Speaker 7: And we very often will judge someone else's relationship and think, well,
• 50:17
  Speaker 7: you know, that's not fair.
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: I think the whole term is gold digger.
• 50:21
  Speaker 7: You know, when we call somebody a gold digger, we're
• 50:23
  Speaker 7: saying they're getting more than their share out of that relationship.
• 50:26
  Speaker 7: You know, that's not fair. I don't know. I wonder, though,
• 50:31
  Speaker 7: because the people in the relationship sometimes They're just doing
• 50:35
  Speaker 7: fine until somebody else says, you know, why do you
• 50:39
  Speaker 7: let her treat you like that?
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: Well, once again, Michael, I'll go back to people are stupid.
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: Because if I come to you and say, Michael, why
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: do you let her treat you like that? And you
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: look at me and you go, my life's great. Why
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: do you care? Why do you care how I'm getting treated?
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: If I don't care, why do you care? And unfortunately,
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: that is not how we look at it. We don't
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: tell people that. I mean, you would tell me that
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: because obviously you're a lot more educated in relationships than
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: anybody else that's in one. They'll go, well, you're right.
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: Maybe I should be treated more. Well, if you don't care,
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: you don't care, you know. And I like the idea
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: of gold diggers because people will say that, oh, financially
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: she's getting all of this, but you don't know what
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: the person paying for it is getting.
• 51:28
  Speaker 7: Yeah, absolutely. And who are we outside to judge what's
• 51:34
  Speaker 7: fair or not? But when you're inside a relationship and
• 51:38
  Speaker 7: things don't feel fair, you know, that's when there's trouble.
• 51:42
  Speaker 7: That's when you start looking at your relationship and kind
• 51:44
  Speaker 7: of asking, oh, wait a minute, do I even have
• 51:47
  Speaker 7: a say here? Can I put my foot down? Can I...
• 51:50
  Speaker 7: Can we at least have a discussion about this? If
• 51:53
  Speaker 7: we can't, there's a problem.
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: Well, that seems more realistic in that sense. Now, let
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: me ask you this, Michael. In a relationship where you
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: feel like things aren't fair, is that real? Now, I
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: know what you're going to say, Michael. It's real because
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: that's how you feel. But sometimes we might look at
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: things and go and forget about what our partner is doing.
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: in the relationship and try to act like we're the
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: victim here and things aren't fair. Yeah.
• 52:26
  Speaker 7: Very often those feelings mean there's something wrong in our relationship.
• 52:30
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 52:31
  Speaker 7: So if I say you're never home, And I have
• 52:35
  Speaker 7: to do all the housework. And that's not fair. Maybe
• 52:39
  Speaker 7: what I'm really saying is I miss you. I miss us.
• 52:42
  Speaker 7: You know, we've sort of drifted apart. We've become disconnected
• 52:46
  Speaker 7: because you're working so much. And now we don't really
• 52:48
  Speaker 7: have much of a relationship. All I have is a
• 52:50
  Speaker 7: relationship with the dirty dishes.
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: All right, Michael, you're going to hold on a second.
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: And we're going to take it a step further about
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: you're not always home. How about you're always on your phone?
• 53:06
  Speaker 1: So Michael Bean is here from the Marriage and Family Center.
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: Good morning, Michael.
• 53:09
  Speaker 7: Well, good morning.
• 53:11
  Speaker 1: All right, 661-327-5100. That's how you get a hold of him. Michael,
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: this idea of fairness in a relationship, when we use
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: that terminology, you, how do I say this? Just because
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: things aren't as fair in my relationship as you believe
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: they are, Does that mean that somebody in the relationship
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: is getting mistreated? Or does one person not care as
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: much about... How do I explain this, Michael? If I
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: don't care about certain things, they just don't bother me.
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: But yet you care about them in your relationship. So
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: you go, well, no, you shouldn't be letting him or
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: her get away with that because that's just unfair to you.
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: And I'm just going, well, I don't... It doesn't bother me.
• 54:01
  Speaker 8: And.
• 54:02
  Speaker 1: Then we start looking at each other in our relationship
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: and going, well, what's fairness anyways? Is it 50-50 as
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: you take out the trash on Friday and I take
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: it out on Saturday? I mean, I do the dishes
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: on Monday and you do them on Tuesday. What does
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: that even mean, Michael?
• 54:19
  Speaker 7: Yeah, there's a saying that goes, there's nothing so unequal
• 54:24
  Speaker 7: as treating unequal people equally. Which, if you think about it,
• 54:30
  Speaker 7: that's kind of like the problem that most of us
• 54:32
  Speaker 7: have with public schools, right? Everybody gets exactly the same deal.
• 54:37
  Speaker 7: Even the people that could be learning a lot faster,
• 54:40
  Speaker 7: they don't get to. And the people who are having
• 54:42
  Speaker 7: trouble kind of keeping up, they stay with the same deal.
• 54:46
  Speaker 7: So nobody kind of– it's just sort of– and I
• 54:49
  Speaker 7: think relationships are kind of the same thing. It's like– No,
• 54:52
  Speaker 7: we are going to be different because we're different people
• 54:55
  Speaker 7: and it has to work for us. The deal that
• 54:58
  Speaker 7: we create for ourselves, the kind of the job description
• 55:03
  Speaker 7: we create for ourselves in a relationship needs to work
• 55:06
  Speaker 7: for us. The problem is when it doesn't. And then
• 55:09
  Speaker 7: I can't communicate about it. You know, that's the thing you,
• 55:13
  Speaker 7: you know, I started with the thing of, you know,
• 55:15
  Speaker 7: you're never home and you came back. The problem for
• 55:22
  Speaker 7: that couple is, okay, how do you negotiate that? How
• 55:26
  Speaker 7: do you figure it out so that you can both
• 55:28
  Speaker 7: be happy with the quality and quality of time that
• 55:31
  Speaker 7: you have together?
• 55:32
  Speaker 1: So you see these people, um, I always make fun
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: of Michael cause I always see these people around town.
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: the guy's driving his truck and the girl, uh, the
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: wife or the girlfriend just sitting on her phone. She's
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: on her phone. He's driving the truck. And I always think, uh, wow,
• 55:48
  Speaker 1: that's interesting. People get upset about that. But what if
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: you're okay with that? What if in your relationship, you
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: just have no problem with that scenario. When a lot
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: of people look at it and go, my God, you
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: can't talk to him or, you know, it's just, you
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: get these things that people will say are unequal in relationships.
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: And it just seems like, Who makes those decisions for you?
• 56:10
  Speaker 7: You, right? Exactly. You're setting the rules as you go along,
• 56:16
  Speaker 7: whether you talk about them or not, whether you realize
• 56:19
  Speaker 7: it or not. You're setting the expectations and the rules
• 56:22
  Speaker 7: and everything. So now, hey, there's an issue that I'm having.
• 56:27
  Speaker 7: What are the rules that we've established for talking about
• 56:30
  Speaker 7: the issues that come up? Oh, you're just complaining, and
• 56:34
  Speaker 7: you need to be– okay, well, now the rule is
• 56:37
  Speaker 7: if I ever bring up an issue, I get shot
• 56:39
  Speaker 7: down and told not to complain. That's– ouch. So every
• 56:44
  Speaker 7: relationship is going to have their difficulties. But really good
• 56:48
  Speaker 7: relationships are able to kind of say, hey, let's sit
• 56:51
  Speaker 7: down and figure this out because we both want to
• 56:53
  Speaker 7: be happy here. And the partner says, no, you're right.
• 56:56
  Speaker 6: We do.
• 56:57
  Speaker 7: We both need to be happy. Let's sit down and
• 56:59
  Speaker 7: come up with something that works for both of us.
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: As a human being, Michael, has society changed us into
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: believing that everything needs to be 100% 50-50 or 100% equal?
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: If it's not, then we have been victimized in some way.
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: Have we always been like that as a society?
• 57:18
  Speaker 7: It might be even a little worse than that. We
• 57:21
  Speaker 7: might have become a little more self-centered. It's not even–
• 57:26
  Speaker 7: it should be 50-50. It's just that I should be
• 57:28
  Speaker 7: able to get my way in every way, and I
• 57:31
  Speaker 7: should be able to get it right now with little,
• 57:34
  Speaker 7: little effort. With just pushing a button, I should be
• 57:37
  Speaker 7: able to get what I want right now. And no,
• 57:43
  Speaker 7: reality in a relationship is not like that. It's like
• 57:46
  Speaker 7: let's together create the thing that works for us. And
• 57:50
  Speaker 7: that feels different. It's more of a dance than just
• 57:54
  Speaker 7: going on a solo hike.
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: How hard is it? And we've had this conversation before, Michael.
• 58:00
  Speaker 1: How hard is it for somebody that has no clue
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: what it feels like, what you've just said, versus couples
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: that you've met, and worked with, and have absolutely bought
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: into what you said, and you can just see their
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: relationship and feel how much better it is. Does that
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: make sense, what I just asked you?
• 58:22
  Speaker 10: I know.
• 58:22
  Speaker 7: Ask it a different way.
• 58:23
  Speaker 1: Keep going. But... You got.
• 58:29
  Speaker 7: This couple that just sort of, they get it. They
• 58:32
  Speaker 7: just kind of, they just... Yeah, some people are raised
• 58:35
  Speaker 7: in families where the parents kind of modeled that. They
• 58:41
  Speaker 7: demonstrated it. Other parents, they never did. In fact, some
• 58:47
  Speaker 7: of the couples who have the most difficulty will say,
• 58:50
  Speaker 7: I never heard my parents fight. If they ever had
• 58:53
  Speaker 7: a disagreement, they always took it away from us. So
• 58:56
  Speaker 7: they never actually got to see how somebody works things
• 59:00
  Speaker 7: out without hurting the relationship.
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 59:03
  Speaker 7: Because it was just never modeled for them. Other people,
• 59:06
  Speaker 7: they're like, no, our parents kind of have their issues sometimes,
• 59:09
  Speaker 7: but they always work them through. Okay, cool. That's going
• 59:12
  Speaker 7: to set the stage for good problem solving later on.
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: And there's just a lot of couples out there that
• 59:17
  Speaker 1: don't understand what you're talking about because they just don't know.
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: They think their way's the right way or they think
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: we got these societal standards out there that'll say, well,
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: the wife's supposed to get whatever she wants. Happy wife,
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: happy life. The man's just supposed to suffer in silence
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: or the woman's supposed to do all this and the
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: man's not supposed to do that. I mean, you just
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: have these societal standards that really do make it difficult,
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: I think, when we have these conversations about how to
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: really be in a happy relationship.
• 59:45
  Speaker 7: Or they're in the honeymoon phase, so they don't get
• 59:47
  Speaker 7: it because they're just everything is rosy. Or they just
• 59:50
  Speaker 7: got out of the honeymoon phase and they don't get
• 59:52
  Speaker 7: it because now, you know, their relationship is, you know,
• 59:55
  Speaker 7: they never do anything for me anymore. And I don't
• 59:58
  Speaker 7: think they love me anymore. And so everything is miserable. Well, OK,
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 7: but life exists. 95% of life exists outside of either
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 7: the honeymoon phase or, hey, we just came out of
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 7: the honeymoon phase. A long-term relationship is about figuring out
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 7: a way to be happy long-term without the starry-eyed fireworks
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 7: all the time. And without the just combative head-to-head, we're
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 7: just trying to work out– the roles in our relationship. Uh,
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 7: it's tough to get through that phase. It really is.
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 7: When you're in the honeymoon phase, you really do think
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 7: it's going to be like that forever. And when it
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 7: goes away, you're really convinced that, Oh, this is the
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 7: end and they don't love me. And it's so hard
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 7: to navigate that and get past that.
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 2: And go, Oh, Oh, I see.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 7: Okay. Oh, that was because it was a new relationship and,
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 7: Now let's move into this more comfortable, kind of committed
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 7: love that isn't all fireworks all the time, but also isn't,
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 7: you know, the negative fireworks. It doesn't shoot missiles at
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 7: each other either.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I get it. From the Marriage and Family Center,
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: good morning, Michael.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 4: Good morning.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: All right, so relationships. Relationships are tough. We're talking a
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: little bit about the equality in relationships, which everybody wants
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: things to be fair. It's kind of human nature now.
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: Is it just human nature, Michael, that we don't want
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 1: to be, gosh, mistreated is such a strong word because
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: I don't think a lot of people in relationships that
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: find when you're looking from the outside in, you think
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 1: they're unequal, but I think the people in them are
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: kind of okay with them now. Uh, is that because
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: they just learned to live with it or is that
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: because it's really, uh, they really aren't concerned as much
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: as you are about their relationship? Um, I just don't know, Michael,
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: how we get there, how we, or how we get
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: past it at a certain point. How do you, how
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: do you balance the fact of, am I being unfairly
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: treated in this relationship or am I just accepting it?
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: And how do you, I mean, That's a fine line, Michael.
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 8: It is.
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 7: No, it totally is. Because we can get so hung
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 7: up on, well, anything. But in this case, you know,
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 7: things not being fair. And on the other hand, we
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 7: can sometimes fail to stand up for ourselves in ways
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 7: we need to. And there's a balance. There just has
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 7: to be. It absolutely is. I think very often that
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 7: part of us that is kind of nagging at us going,
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 7: you're not being treated very fairly. That's not fair. It's
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 7: not fair, especially when someone else gets something good and.
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: Then we think that's not fair.
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 7: So part in us that does that is like almost
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 7: the opposite of the part of us that, you know,
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 7: you're hiking in nature or whatever and you just crest
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 7: this trail and you see this beautiful vista and you're
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 7: just like, that's amazing. There's a part of you that
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 7: can experience that sense of just okayness and wonder and
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 7: awe and joy. The part of us that says that's
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 7: not fair is so far away from that part that
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 7: just gives us inner peace and a sense of just
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 7: okayness in the world and that there's really need. No,
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 7: it's sort of a distraction from that. to a point.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 7: Like you said, sometimes you need to stand up for
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 7: yourself and kind of go, you know, the way things
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 7: are working out, this just isn't working for me. Let's
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 7: come up with something else.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: You know, we come to that conclusion a lot when
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: we talk, Michael, about people going, this is not working
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: for me. And I just want to kind of look
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 1: at the other side of it for a second and go,
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 1: this is not working for me because of X, Y,
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 1: and Z. But am I being selfish in the fact
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 1: of what X, Y, and Z are? Am I not
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: understanding the relationship that I'm in? Is it me that's
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: the problem? And I'm over here, you know, politicking it around.
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: I'm over here being a politician, making you the problem.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 1: Am I spitting it?
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 7: No, if you throw some blame in there, it makes
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 7: it even harder, doesn't it? So I don't like how
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 7: this is going on. I don't like how things are
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 7: working out. And it's your fault or it's because you're X, Y, Z,
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 7: inconsiderate or manipulative or whatever thing I kind of throw
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 7: in there that now makes it personal. It's going to
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 7: be really hard for us to come up with that
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 7: compromise now because now I'm defensive, right? You just called
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 7: me manipulative.
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 5: So how could I.
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 7: Sit down and have a decent conversation with you about
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 7: how to solve the problem?
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 1: I get it. How do you.
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: I get it. But I mean, there are people driving
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 1: to work right now going, oh, you know what? That
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 1: was unfair what happened to me last night. My family
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 1: could have been a little more concerned about my situation.
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 1: Is that... I mean.
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 7: Is.
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 1: Is that wrong? Is it, is it really, are you
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 1: just being in your feelings right now because you're tired
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: or because you had to do something late? I mean,
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: there's a, I mean, I don't know, Michael, how, how
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: do you, how do you know what's real or what's
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 1: not real?
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 7: Well, and again, I'm going to tell you it's real,
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 7: but what should be done about it, if anything, that's
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 7: really kind of the question, isn't it? If I'm driving
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 7: along and having those thoughts and thinking that, wow, the
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 7: family could have been more supportive of that. That's genuine. Okay,
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 7: I'll validate that. Talk to me. I'll tell you, I
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 7: don't blame you for feeling that way. I probably would, too.
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 7: The question is, what do we do about it? Are
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 7: we going to stew on it or think that I'm
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 7: never going to get a fair shake in life or
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 7: think that I've surrounded myself with selfish people? Or am
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 7: I going to say, hey, I actually want myself and
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 7: the people around me to get more of the good stuff.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 7: How do we make that happen?
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 9: All right.
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 1: Michael Bean is here from the Marriage and Family Center, 661-327-5100.
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 1: Good morning, Michael. Good morning. All right.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 2: Now.
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 1: I don't know that we've solved anything or that we
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: will with relationships, but hopefully people will get a little
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 1: bit closer to understanding each other and realizing that, you know,
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: you can, if you just talk about things, that sounds
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 1: really dumb, huh, Michael? If you just talk about things.
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 7: If you're in a relationship where you can just talk
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 7: about things, but a lot of people are not, they
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 7: try to bring stuff up. It gets just sort of
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 7: like shifted to, yeah, well, we'll talk about it later.
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 7: or just dismissed, or it actually escalates into a war,
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 7: and they don't dare bring stuff up because they're walking
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 7: on eggshells. It's a terrible feeling. We've all been that
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 7: way with, like, maybe someone in a work environment. You know,
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 7: there's a coworker who just, like, somehow we rubbed them
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 7: the wrong way or whatever, and now we have to
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 7: just tiptoe around them. It's a terrible feeling. And when
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 7: you're in a relationship and it's like that, you've got
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 7: to do something about it.
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: You know, when you say it like that, Michael, how
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 1: do you get there? I mean, that's not the, I mean,
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 1: I just, how did you get there? There had to
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 1: be an issue that brought you to this point, whether
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: it be over years or whether it be something very specific,
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: but there had to be something that got you to
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 1: the point where you don't feel comfortable saying something to
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 1: your partner.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 7: Well, I know I talk about this a lot, but
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 7: remember that in the initial stage of the relationship, when
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 7: you're in that starry-eyed honeymoon phase, you just kind of
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 7: don't have to deal with stuff. You don't have to
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 7: deal with each other's worst sides because you're bringing out
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 7: the best in them all the time. And it's really
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 7: easy because hormones are going crazy in you and in them.
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 7: But then when that starts to wear off now, all
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 7: of a sudden it's like, oh, okay, now there's a
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 7: real person in front of me. I can't continue being
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 7: in a relationship with my fantasy person because reality is
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 7: here and it's not always an easy transition. It just isn't.
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 1: Wow, that's crazy. All right, Michael, I will talk to
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 1: you next week. There's nothing going on next Thursday, so
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 1: you and I will do it all over again. Michael
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 1: Bean from the Marriage and Family Center.
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 2: 661-327-5100.
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 1: Romeo in the morning. Every morning.
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 7: 94.1.