Latest / The Rachelle Starr Podcast / Life After the Choice | The Rachelle Starr Podcast Episode 5
Transcript
- Rachelle Starr: Hi, I'm Rochelle, the host of the Rochelle Star Podcast, where we equip the church to bring the hope and love of Jesus to women in the adult entertainment industry. We're going to be having honest conversations about what that really looks like. So if you've ever wondered how to engage in this space or how to do it well, you're in the right place. Hi everybody, we are back and I'm so excited for this episode. Natalie and I are gonna be talking about some really amazing stories that God has done in our ministry, but we're gonna really look at the intersection between pregnancy, the industry, pro-life, ⁓ and choosing life as we have a few amazing miracle stories that have happened recently. And so I'm excited to dive into this and talk about a a topic that's very near and dear to my heart. And so ⁓ I think really starting and kicking this off, Natalie and I both have adopted children and we're both very passionate about that and very passionate about foster care and seeing vulnerable children welcome into fa safe families and we love ⁓ life and we love just walking alongside women that are experiencing unplanned pregnancies and all of those things that come with it. But it's also complicated and it's also very complex. And Natalie and I have no short of stories to share, but this recently a beautiful story from a woman named Sarah has taken place and I really want to turn it over to Natalie to share that story. Yeah thanks Rochelle. So I met Sarah actually over a year ago, as a dancer and ⁓ we prayed together and she kind of shared some of her story and we had a really good conversation. And then several months later I hadn't seen her and then I saw her again and we reconnected and we prayed again and we talked and I just said, you know, I would really love to get coffee sometime. And so she agreed and so we got coffee and I was able to share a little bit more of the gospel with her. ⁓ I was able to hear even more of her story, ⁓ just where she's from, ⁓ kind of what led her to the industry and getting that kind and her faith background, which was not much. And ⁓ so that went really well and then I said, Hey, let's do this again. And it we were able to get together again a month later and I had no idea. ⁓ But we were talking and chatting, and I said, so what else is going on? And she just broke down. And she said, you know, before this, I was talking to another woman who works at the club, and she asked me if I was gonna tell you this, and I didn't know if I was going to, because I'm worried to tell you and scared of what you'll say. She said, But I'm pregnant. And I don't know what to do. And in that moment first I just I first just praised God that He was able to get rid of any barriers that there were for her to tell me and the fact that she felt safe enough to share such a vulnerable piece of information. And so like I usually do, I just listened more and said, Well, how How are you feeling? What's going on? ⁓ how can I support you? And she said, I j I just don't know if if I can do this. I just got my own place. I don't know if I can do that, like have a baby and and still pay the bills and work and and the dad was not supportive and ⁓ she said he agreed to pay for an abortion and I'm really thinking of taking him up on that. And in that moment I had several options. I could have freaked out and said, no, you can't get an abortion. God wouldn't like that. Like you know, this is you have to have this baby. I could have just ignored the problem and just been like, ⁓ well, what are you doing this weekend? And just I completely shut down. ⁓ but I decided that in that moment she needed to realize that her life was valuable in order to understand how valuable the life inside of her was. And so I just told her like, I love you. I'm here to support you. God loves you too. And can I pray for you about this? Cause I think prayer is our most powerful weapon against darkness, like abortion. And I felt in that moment I really needed to use my most powerful tool. Yeah. And so we prayed and ⁓ We then were able to continue talking, continue just being supportive. And she eventually told me that through a series of events that ⁓ she had decided to not get an abortion. And it was really interesting because when she told me, she said, I knew that you would love me either way. ⁓ And I think that that's really important to understand that all the women that we serve Walking alongside of them and them knowing that we will love them and that God loves them no matter what is so important. Because being pro life is not just about it understanding the value of life inside the womb, but understanding the value of life outside of it too. The person who is carrying the life and supporting that person. And so at Scarlet Hope we have thrown many baby showers and ⁓ we have supported many women who have gone through this journey and have many barriers such as unsupportive Family members, unsupportive fathers, the pressure to be especially the industry, to uphold beauty standards, to uphold the work that they do. ⁓ being a single mom and all of the stigma that entails and all of the financial issues that that entails as a single mom myself, I never realized how exploited. Single moms are. And it's just a whole different world. And so I have been able to relate to her on ⁓ that level too. Just, you know, she's even said, well, if you can be a single mom of four kids, she's like, I could do it with one. I was like, absolutely. And so all that to say, I really love how Scarlet Hope. meets the women where they're at because I would have never met this woman outside of the club. Yeah. You know, and I didn't know she was gonna get pregnant. She didn't know she was gonna get pregnant. ⁓ but God knew. Yeah. And so he orchestrates all these chance, quote unquote, meetings for us to walk alongside these women so when they have things like an unplanned pregnancy, they don't go to other people. They come to us. And that is it's it's a privilege to be that person for someone else. I love I I love that. And there's so much to really dive into because one of the things I want to look at on this episode is unplanned pregnancies are a very real aspect and issue that we at Scarlet Hope have dealt with since the very beginning. I remember one of the first, I don't know if I've ever told you the story, but one of the very first women that I knew that was pregnant but was also in escorting and dancing, she became pregnant and I got to go to her ultrasounds. She did choose life. ⁓ but as I was walking alongside her, you know, she was in poverty, she had been in the sex indust industry since she was fourteen years old and she was at the time of this child she was only eighteen and I ended up being in the delivery room with her with this baby. And I was so thankful that she chose life. But we're in the delivery room and she has the baby and the nurse looks at her and she says, Do you want to hold your son. And she looks at me and she said, I I can't because I can't take care of him. So will you please hold him? And this little boy came onto my chest. And he I laid, you know, in a chair beside her and held this little boy for the next twenty-four hours and He ended up coming home with my husband and I from the hospital and she wanted to sign her rights away to him, ⁓ so that, you know, sh he could have a better life. Well, long story short, through a series of events we found out who the father was and the father was in prison and he had still in the state of Kentucky, he still had rights. And he would not give up those rights. Though he had no ac knowledge from the beginning of this girl being pregnant with his son. And I tell this story for a couple of reasons. One is we deal with all sorts of spectrums of unplanned pregnancies and pregnan and planned pregnancies and abortions and ⁓ you know, the aftermath of abortions and adoptions and we've we've done through Scrollhout we've done all of it. Yep. ⁓ been a part of, you know, experiencing all of that through their lives. And it's it no matter what aspect, whether, you know, it's like Sarah and we're so joyful and so excited for her. But when I think about the woman that I was speaking about and Sarah's life that mimics this other woman's life, we the the choice in the celebration doesn't really stop at the choice of life. It's a long process to walk alongside this woman to support her, to care for her, to get her in a community, like you were saying, you know, these women really can't do this alone and we know that they have to be in a community and so introducing them to a network of people. So let's talk about what are you, you know, your plans gonna be with Sarah moving forward and how is that gonna work from Scarlet Hope's perspective to support her and make sure it's not just choosing life, but it's it's like for the rest of your life. How do we s make sure that you are supported? I really like how you were talking about community and how we can't do it alone. I always think about how God is community. That's one of his characters because he is triune. He's there's a trinity in God. So God himself is community and he created us in his image and part of that image is that we need community. And so a lot of times I think women who experience unplanned pregnancies, single moms, the world and sometimes the church, their response is just kinda like, let's ignore this. And so single moms can be come outcasts really in society. And ⁓ I think a lot of times we can rejoice, like you said, with a woman who chooses life. ⁓ but after a baby is born, that baby has to be a toddler. That baby has to be a child. That baby has to be a teenager. Like th Being pro life is being like you said, life. Life. It's not just yeah. It's not just being pro birth. And so at Scarlet Hope, ⁓ what we try to do is really what I like to call adding on to the team of support. So that looks like, okay, what does she say her needs are? So some woman that we serve, their biggest needs are I have no way To get baby stuff. And so, like I've said before, we've thrown many a baby showers ⁓ for the women that we serve. ⁓ some women, their biggest thing is, okay, how am I gonna work? And so walking with them and okay, this is how practical things like okay, this is how you get government assistance for daycare, these are safe and good daycares. or okay, these are good places to work for single moms that ⁓ have flexible hours or have other single moms that work there so they understand that when a child is sick, a single mom doesn't have another parent to lean on. ⁓ and so practical things like that for sure. And then I think at Scarlet Hope we do such a great job. Well our volunteers, first of all, are literally amazing. Could not do it without them. And so I've never had problems having volunteers come alongside and just be supportive. ⁓ and just be there. You know, invite them like when they invite us to their showers, we go. Or if no one has a shower for them, we throw it. if there's no one to go into the delivery room and they ask us, we go. if someone's with them at the delivery room, but then when they get home everyone leaves. We bring food, we bring clothing. And so it's just kind of seeing the needs and listening to the woman of okay, what do I need in my mother herd journey? ⁓ maybe the woman has chosen ⁓ adoption and so walking alongside her with that. ⁓ it just really boils down to listening to her where are the gaps and how can we step inside of those gaps and help. And that's I love the term like we're not just pro birth, we're pro life and life means life and that means life until, you know, yeah, that kid's an adult. I mean, I just came across a photo and we're we're about to wrap up here for a few minutes and we could talk about this could be mul a multi episode, part two, part three. ⁓ but I the a kid ⁓ that my husband and I got the privilege of fostering so his her mom could, you know, ⁓ she was a dancer that I knew, get up on her feet again, just turned seventeen and I you know, I just think about that moment is she was she's been I I w we were very pivotal in her life in the beginning. Mm-hmm and we stayed in contact little by little, but through the years the mom got stronger and she got her own network of people and she got, you know went to school and got a job and all those things. And now to look at her daughter and she's 17 years old and about to graduate high school is just such a beautiful picture of what it means to actually be pro-life. And ⁓ and how God can truly redeem and restore. But we know that that is not everyone's story. There are plenty of stories that do not end that way at Scarlet Hope. And yet we know that God still calls us to show up, to sit beside To love, to support, ⁓ every step of the way. And some of the hardest things that I've done at Skrut Hope is sit with a woman a day after she chose abortion and to truly like you said in the beginning, express to her how loved she is and how worthy she is of that love by God, and that there's nothing too far too Too sinful that God cannot redeem. Yeah. I remember the first time I walked with a woman through an abortion after she had it. And just like I looked at the woman who chose life and said, I love you, God loves you, I'm here. I looked at that woman who chose abortion and said, I love you. And God loves you and I'm here. Yes. And I'm still there for her. And I'm still f there for this woman who has ⁓ chosen life. And I just love ⁓ recently she shared ⁓ a ⁓ ultrasound picture and just said, like, my baby and I love you. I love that. I know. And I just like God has given us such a great opportunity here at Scarlet Hope to have those beautiful moments. And so praise God for that. Praise God. Well, this has been a really heartfelt, sweet episode. I'm so thankful that we get to share these stories with you. So I hope it's been encouraging. If you are listening to this and you're facing an unplanned pregnancy, please reach out to us. We'd love to have a conversation with you. We would love to pray for you. We would love to be here for you, especially if you're in the industry and you're facing that. And if you are from a church or you're a Christian, please take some of these tips and we just ask that you ⁓ Prayerfully walk alongside women no matter what their experience and their story is and listen and watch God show up and do miracles. And He does. That's right. Thank you for listening to the Rochelle Star podcast. If this conversation encouraged you or challenged you, I'd invite you to take the next step. Whether that's learning more, getting involved, or sharing this episode with someone else. At Scarlet Hope, we believe consistent presence changes lives. And there's a place for you in this work. You can learn more at ScarletHope.org.