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The Sure-Fire Sign Your Partner Is Cheating! · Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: With the John and Ben Podcast.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Cheers to Dilma making the world a bitter tea.
• 0:06
  Speaker 3: Good morning to you, Julia, good morning.
• 0:09
  Speaker 4: Lovely to have you, lovely to hear you adults at
• 0:11
  Speaker 4: tones again?
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Oh please?
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Have you missed us or you've been privately investigating us?
• 0:16
  Speaker 3: On the side, I'm always investigating you, guys.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: You know that you found.
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: Whole pile of sock?
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: Have you found my sock? Julia? Because you know we've
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: got touch with you, like, look for my sock? Have
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: you found it?
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: I found more than your sock?
• 0:33
  Speaker 5: Got some dirty laundry? Is the main reason why people
• 0:41
  Speaker 5: get in touch with you.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: Let's put socks aside for the moment. What's the main
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: reason people get in touch with you?
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: Because they know something's wrong, They feel it with every
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: sense of their body, no matter what it is, and
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: they just want someone to confirm it for them.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: What percentage of people who come to you with an
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: inkling are actually correct?
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: Pretty much? Ninety nine percent?
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: Wow?
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: But the one thing is, and I don't know whether
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: I've mentioned this to you guys before, the reason probably
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: we tend to talk about men more, or people assume
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: men play around more, which they don't women play around
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: just as much men. Oh look, you're onto it, but
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: and guys just they are the ones that don't have
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: a plan and they get that's why they get caught,
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: whereas women tend not to get caught.
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: So women are harder to catch.
• 1:35
  Speaker 6: So do you get to the percentage of your clientele
• 1:37
  Speaker 6: Is it a split between you know, men and women
• 1:40
  Speaker 6: coming to you to investigate their partners or.
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: Well, it's probably more women because they because men don't
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: realize it, but they give the show away quite quickly,
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: quite easily. They'll say things, and they'll say things that
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: make a woman think, oh, I wasn't even thinking about that,
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: but now you've mention of that. Maybe I should, you know,
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: whereas a woman knows, try and keep your behavior, this
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: behavior the same as it's always been. And if you
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: want to talk about it, talk about it to a girlfriend.
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: So you're not going to say anything you shouldn't at home.
• 2:13
  Speaker 4: Women's intuition, she was the problems. We're dealing with the
• 2:16
  Speaker 4: smartest species and we cannot compect.
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: Look, I'm do you know what? I'd like that to
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: go on record because that is actually the truth. And
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: I think as time goes on, more people will really
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: realize that.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: Alside, like men aren't. You're not great at picking up
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: on the cues, even down to you know, like us
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: dropping him and what we want for our birthday or whatever.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: You're just not really picking up on the hints. So
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: that I guess that's part of it too.
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: Oh totally. Look, you know, you know yourself. You could
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: come home and you've changed your hair or you've done
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: something and you and your husband or your significant other
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: just wouldn't even notice until you say, what do you think?
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: And they oh, well, I was going to mention that,
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: you know, as if they did notice it, but of
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: course if they didn't. So that is why women pick
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: up on subtle little things, really subtle things that men
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: just don't. And and look, we do deal with a
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: lot of men, but often they'll come to us when
• 3:14
  Speaker 3: it's perhaps the affair or the relationship is coming to
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: an end, because that's how long it takes them to
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: pick up on the cues. And I'm not and I'm
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: not being disparaging or it is just a fact of
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: the difference is between the sexes, that's all.
• 3:26
  Speaker 6: What what is then? You know, you've caught so many
• 3:29
  Speaker 6: cheetahs over the years. What what is the common the
• 3:34
  Speaker 6: common theme, the common reason that people stray from the relationship.
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: I think it's, well, look it's I think it's in
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: your DNA because often and other the way you say,
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: I have been doing this. I run the company, My
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: investigators are out there doing the catching.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: Don't get your hands dirty.
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: I'm not silly, but I think what it is we
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: find it's I think it's more in your DNA, A
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: bit like people like Tiger Woods. You know, people like
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: that that it's there no matter what you do, it's
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: not going to stop. So I have clients that repeat clients,
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: and they might have started I've been doing this for
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: thirty years now, so they may have started off in
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: their thirties coming to me, but still dealing with the
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: same thing, you know, thirty years later. And what we
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: find as people get older stick. If you put up
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: with this, and you continually put up with it, and
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: you try and forgive and make it work, and that
• 4:29
  Speaker 3: your partner knows you can get away with it, usually
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: at the end they do leave you for the love
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: of one of their flings. They actually do leave you.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: What do you think about the old adage once to cheat,
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: it always a cheatah cheatah ever changes as spots.
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: I think cheetahs can change their spots because but it
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: comes down to something really simple. You know, we do
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: a lot of Christmas parties and you see some odd
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: stuff going on.
• 4:56
  Speaker 6: You do awkward conversation, not knowing how you to talk
• 5:00
  Speaker 6: to your boss, that sort of stuff.
• 5:01
  Speaker 5: Probably more other than that, but that's right, that's slightly odd.
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: And the thing is, it's you know, we had one
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: guy that did do something that he shouldn't have. But
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: what I thought was so good about him? Has he
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: actually fested up to his wife and he said, I
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: totally screwed up. I really did, And he told her
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: now that marriage survived and that marriage is fine. It's
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: really good. It actually got stronger because he fessed up.
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: She didn't have to find out, she didn't have to
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: plead with him to go to counseling. You know, he
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: made all the changes himself on his own. And that's
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: where you know you have got someone who is going
• 5:38
  Speaker 3: to work it out and not do it again.
• 5:41
  Speaker 5: So you've got people obviously that work for you finding
• 5:44
  Speaker 5: evidence and stuff. What sort of evidence are they finding?
• 5:46
  Speaker 5: Is it sort of like they're taking photos? Was sitting
• 5:49
  Speaker 5: outside people's properties. I mean, how does that sort of
• 5:51
  Speaker 5: work these days?
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: Well, it's interesting because the privacy actor is pretty tight here.
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: So the one thing that does work is surveillance, you know,
• 5:59
  Speaker 3: the eye on it. It is the best form of
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: investigating is to have the eyes of the investigator on
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: the subject. So it's actually, yeah, it's surveillance that's what
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: turns up everything. And like I say, at Christmas parties,
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: people tend to have a few drinks and wander out
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: to the car park and you know, open the car
• 6:18
  Speaker 3: door and perhaps keep their foot in the car with
• 6:20
  Speaker 3: leaves the lights on, and kisses someone that they shouldn't be.
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: It's you know, it's easy stuff like that, and bang,
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: there's your photo, there's your that's it.
• 6:30
  Speaker 6: Has there been an instance where you've been on a
• 6:32
  Speaker 6: case and you've been tailing the person it's like, oh, no,
• 6:35
  Speaker 6: they just have a secret addiction to badminton or something
• 6:38
  Speaker 6: that they didn't want to share.
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: Well funny you say that, because we had one case
• 6:43
  Speaker 3: that was quite funny where this guy would go through
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: a child's playground into the bushes and disappear and my
• 6:49
  Speaker 3: one of my investigators looked like a Viking, and he said,
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: I can't hang around here. I look like a bloody pedophile.
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: And but anyway, he followed this guy, and this guy
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: went on a twenty minute bushwalk out to a nudist speech.
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: And he for twenty five years had been married and
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: he was going to this nudist speech. His wife had
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: no idea he was a neudist, and so.
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: Well the positive he wasn't having an a fear.
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: That's right, he was just running around naked.
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they wee, she might be into it. It must
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: be heart it must be heartbreaking for you.
• 7:22
  Speaker 6: And I imagine it doesn't get any easier having to
• 7:24
  Speaker 6: go back to the person and confirm their their worst fear.
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: Well fun, but you see, it's not really because that's
• 7:31
  Speaker 3: what I said in the beginning. These people actually know
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: they they have They have lived with this for months
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: or years before they call me. They really thought long
• 7:41
  Speaker 3: and hard about calling a private investigator. And it's got
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: to the point where they to save their sanity because
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: they've been guessed that they just know they need to
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: do something. And so for them it's like a relief
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: that they know, oh my god, I'm not nuts after all.
• 7:57
  Speaker 6: Right, Yeah, what's one thing, one sure fire sign someone's straying.
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: I was going to say, taking your phone into the toilet,
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: taking your phone everywhere you go, not allowing you've been
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: super protective of your phone, or deleting, deleting, deleting. You know,
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: that's that's that's pretty much because hey, look the old adage,
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: if you've got nothing to hide, you hide nothing great.
• 8:24
  Speaker 5: Editge What if I'm planning a surprise party or something
• 8:26
  Speaker 5: like that, Oh, this Dick's coming through.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: What if that's you.
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: Know, but you know what the thing is. You know
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: when there's something right and something wrong. You know, when
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: there's something wrong in your marriage or in your relationship,
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: you instinctively feel it and you just but you'll keep
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: trying to deny it and trying to justify it. But
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: I think we all know when things are not going right,
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: and no matter how much you want them to be better,
• 8:51
  Speaker 3: if that niggel just doesn't go away, you know you've
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: got to do something about it.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 8:56
  Speaker 6: And and do people go to extreme links high affairs?
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: Women do?
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: Do they what's the most extreme cases?
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: I think they kind of women just you always usually
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: get the help of a girlfriend, and that's a great
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: cover because you know, the girl's night out or the
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: girl's going away to the batch, or the girls are
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: doing this and it's not the girls at all. It's
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: only one only one girl really, so.
• 9:22
  Speaker 4: The girls week in we need to be I'm more
• 9:24
  Speaker 4: suspicious of girls.
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: Girls are really, you know, because look, you know as
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: a woman that we have great friendships, deep friendships with
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: our friends where you can tell them anything, and you
• 9:37
  Speaker 3: can disclose stuff, and you talk about stuff. You go
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: right down into the depths of situations where men tend
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: to flitter around on top on the surface, they don't
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: really go deep, whereas women go deep.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: I've got to bury my body. Friend, a friend that's
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: going to help me bury your body if I need
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: to one day.
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: Well, we all have those friends, Yes we do.
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: Yeah, she told us the first day she was working
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: with us too.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Which ye kind of put us off a little bit.
• 10:03
  Speaker 4: But anyway, so we might be hiring your services.
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: Well, my husband keeps wondering why there these humps in
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: our gardens odd mound and I have been married four times.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: Trying to mow the lawn.
• 10:18
  Speaker 5: Private investigator, Thank you so much for your time, but
• 10:20
  Speaker 5: answer our questions.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: We really do appreciate it.
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: You guys are welcome