Latest / Rich Fulcher's TalkBox / Ed Night: Professional Flatmates, Streamer Gen, Stealing Mona Lisa and Patreon I TalkBox Ep. 37

Transcript

Ed Night: Professional Flatmates, Streamer Gen, Stealing Mona Lisa and Patreon I TalkBox Ep. 37 · Rich Fulcher's TalkBox

• 0:00
  Hi, I'm Rich Fulcher. Can I trust you?
• 0:04
  I hope you can come watch this episode of Rich Fulcher's Talk
• 0:09
  box. I've got comedian Ed Knight.
• 0:13
  He is very, very engaging. He will suck you into the world
• 0:18
  of comedy. And don't forget, press
• 0:21
  subscribe and like and leave a comment because I'll answer any
• 0:27
  questions you'll have later on in one of the of the podcasts.
• 0:31
  So without further ado, let's just watch at night.
• 0:36
  Come on man, I trust me. No pants there.
• 1:00
  That's good. That's good.
• 1:02
  Nice. Everything.
• 1:04
  Oh, hey, what are you doing? Good to see.
• 1:07
  You thanks for having me. Oh, take your coat off Relax.
• 1:11
  How you getting on? Yeah, pretty good.
• 1:14
  It's it's kind of warm. So boil it off.
• 1:18
  We'll heat it up. Thanks.
• 1:20
  Yeah, this. Chair is what?
• 1:22
  I got some coffee for you. Thanks Rich.
• 1:25
  Are you a big coffee drinker? Yeah, I'm trying to cut down at
• 1:28
  the moment because I used to, I used to drink like 7 or 8 cups a
• 1:31
  day, maybe coffee. Me too but I just now I'm trying
• 1:34
  to do 2 a day. I'm thinking if you stop by like
• 1:39
  2:00. You're laughing.
• 1:40
  That's fine. Yeah.
• 1:41
  Yeah. Because sometimes you're wired
• 1:43
  when you go to bed and you like. Yeah, now I really feel.
• 1:47
  Everything I've done in my life is wrong.
• 1:49
  Yeah, I I kind of already have that before I go to bed, but but
• 1:52
  now at least I don't like, I can eventually kind of fall asleep,
• 1:55
  you know, do. You ever jolt awake thinking of
• 1:58
  something you did in the past that was like effed up?
• 2:01
  I, I, I, I just like everything everyone has over there.
• 2:05
  Just like I'd love to have, I'd love to my I'd love to like, I'd
• 2:09
  love to be able to like hit myself in the head with a frying
• 2:11
  pan and take no doors to fall asleep.
• 2:14
  That would be like the best. Oh, I'd love to be a bliss.
• 2:17
  Well, I have someone in my flat hit me over the head with a
• 2:19
  rolling pin. Why don't you?
• 2:21
  I don't know. I feel like it would hurt, yeah.
• 2:23
  It might hurt. Yeah, that's the thing.
• 2:25
  I'd love to that's. Why they have sleeping pills?
• 2:29
  Actually, one of my flatmates is a doctor, so maybe they couldn't
• 2:31
  do it in a way that doesn't hurt.
• 2:33
  A real doctor? Yeah, Really.
• 2:35
  Yeah, not like a fake one. Not.
• 2:37
  Not like an Indiana Jones doctor.
• 2:38
  But you're a comic. How did you get this Doctor
• 2:42
  flatmate? One of my one of my flatmates is
• 2:43
  a doctor. One of them is a lawyer, one of
• 2:45
  them is a documentary journalist.
• 2:47
  What is this a reality show or what's going on?
• 2:53
  Yeah, that. What the hell?
• 2:55
  How is that? It's.
• 2:55
  An anime that time I got reincarnated as a tenant in a
• 2:58
  high income household. Did you answer an ad?
• 3:02
  Kenny laughs. Yeah, shout out to Kenny for
• 3:05
  that. One.
• 3:05
  Yeah, Kenny. Good.
• 3:06
  Job. No, it's no.
• 3:08
  It's like I've moved in with my girlfriend.
• 3:10
  She lives there. She lives with all those guys.
• 3:13
  She's one of them. She's one of them.
• 3:14
  Oh sorry, Oh my God, my racism is coming out.
• 3:22
  This this guy's girlfriend doesn't have a job.
• 3:26
  That's like that joke, like somebody got in an accident.
• 3:30
  The Sergeant is the mum, yeah. Who made the documentary about
• 3:33
  him? It was his mum because she's the
• 3:35
  document. Exactly.
• 3:37
  Because she so. She is a doctor.
• 3:40
  No, she's a documentarian. Oh, she's a documentarian.
• 3:42
  She. Makes documentarian.
• 3:43
  And she lived with a doctor and a lawyer.
• 3:47
  She lived with a lawyer and a guy that worked for a car
• 3:50
  company and then he moved out and then a guy who was a a local
• 3:56
  physiotherapist moved in and then the doctor moved in and
• 3:59
  then I moved in shortly after. And what's the punch line?
• 4:05
  The punch line is that I can only afford one coffee a day
• 4:09
  now, so she's. Like a professional, she hangs
• 4:12
  out with professional. People.
• 4:15
  But how? How did she hang out with you?
• 4:17
  What happened? The pandemic, the pandemic
• 4:21
  happened, so I didn't know. There was just nothing else
• 4:22
  going on. Nice.
• 4:25
  Yeah, it's kind of like, yeah, being a comedian is kind of min
• 4:28
  maxing because I don't have any of the the skills that they have
• 4:32
  like in terms of like productivity or anything.
• 4:35
  But you have one skill that's like maxed out.
• 4:38
  It's like being like a like a, like a high level wizard.
• 4:41
  Do you know what I mean? You have a little thing called
• 4:43
  whimsy. Yeah, yeah, So like a stiff
• 4:46
  breeze would probably knock me over and I'd I have like no
• 4:49
  motivation and I'm like rubbish. It takes me 10 times longer to
• 4:52
  do any admin than like than like a normal person but like.
• 4:56
  I can't do admin. If someone, if someone slips
• 4:58
  over in the kitchen, I'm a point of them and laugh, yeah.
• 5:00
  Yeah. And do they rely on you for
• 5:03
  stuff? It's like, hey, Ed, I'm not
• 5:04
  feeling so well. Come on in here.
• 5:07
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't.
• 5:08
  I walk in with like a clown that was on like, what's that film?
• 5:11
  What's that? Robin Williams.
• 5:12
  Patch Adams. Yeah, I walk in like Patch Adams
• 5:14
  and then shit, that's what I do. I'm the doctor.
• 5:16
  I've seen that movie in ages. I don't think I've actually ever
• 5:19
  seen it, It's just one of the many.
• 5:21
  Holds up. One of the kind of references
• 5:23
  that I've got second hand from my podcasts and cartoons and
• 5:28
  stuff that I grew up with. I've never, I've never seen
• 5:30
  Patch Adams. I've never seen Goodwill Hunting
• 5:32
  or Dead Pilot Society or any of these movies.
• 5:34
  But I know enough about them because of like.
• 5:36
  Why haven't you seen them or? Whatever.
• 5:38
  I don't know. I just sort of, I guess before
• 5:41
  my time I was too busy. Do you know why?
• 5:43
  Because I think you are now in the streamer generation.
• 5:49
  So it's like you're not gonna pick that movie.
• 5:51
  Yeah, But if it comes on, if you're on tour and it comes on a
• 5:55
  cable channel, you will watch it.
• 5:57
  You're right, I'm because I'm from, I'm part of the streamer
• 5:59
  generation. I don't have time to watch Patch
• 6:01
  Adams because I'm watching like a yeah, like I'm watching, I
• 6:05
  show speed. I'm watching a 24 hour Twitch
• 6:07
  stream of a guy who's like let's the chat control like the the
• 6:11
  the air horns and flashing lights in his bedroom so that
• 6:13
  you can't sleep. Or your girlfriend is making you
• 6:16
  watch documentary on like Argentinian pottery.
• 6:19
  Or something I don't have time to do it because I'm part of the
• 6:21
  streamer generation so I'm too busy watching V2.
• 6:23
  But since spending all my money on, you know, on on like chat
• 6:27
  Subs and stuff like that. You know you can use all this
• 6:29
  stuff. Can you?
• 6:31
  Yeah, this will be on the air and you can take notes from it
• 6:34
  like I'm going to use all this. That's what podcasts are for
• 6:38
  now. I saw podcasts were for for
• 6:42
  YouTube now. Yeah, everyone's filming them,
• 6:46
  but a lot still the majority Listen right, Kenny, can you
• 6:52
  flash up all the stats when we're talking?
• 6:55
  It fucking freaks me out because in my head podcasts are like, I
• 6:58
  remember the the nicency of podcasts and in my head they're
• 7:01
  meant to be like extremely DIY. So kind of the same thing with
• 7:06
  YouTube videos or whatever, but now they're like if you look at
• 7:09
  the charts and stuff, they're dominated by massive production
• 7:11
  companies and channels and stuff like that.
• 7:13
  Same with YouTube, like the big the big the videos that do well
• 7:15
  are like multi $1,000,000. Because they get involved in it
• 7:18
  now. Yeah.
• 7:19
  And it used to be. It's still low fi.
• 7:23
  I mean, if you do it yourself, you know, you you take in all
• 7:27
  the revenue and everything. Yeah.
• 7:29
  But then there were our producers.
• 7:31
  It's like we're an indie movie. Yeah.
• 7:34
  Yeah, all the podcasts I've done are produced myself, and it does
• 7:37
  feel like you're kind of like up against it a little bit, I
• 7:40
  suppose. Do you do a podcast now?
• 7:43
  No, not at the moment, but there's always one in the
• 7:46
  pipeline in there. Well, less competition is it?
• 7:48
  Less competition I'm. It's like we have all these
• 7:52
  little radio stations, you know? I'm going to make a podcast
• 7:55
  called At Night's Chatty Cube and take over your patch.
• 7:58
  Oh, man. Yeah.
• 8:00
  It's it's it's like everyone's got like a pirate radio station.
• 8:04
  And yeah, it's very strange. I was walking through Soho just
• 8:07
  now to get here, not to dox you. Sorry about that.
• 8:10
  I'm in Soho in New York and just the streets are just literally
• 8:13
  full of children with Vox Pop microphones interviewing people
• 8:16
  in the street for TikTok content.
• 8:18
  It's crazy. Did they interview?
• 8:20
  You No, I've, I'm terrified of a few people have come up to me
• 8:23
  and been like, can I ask you a couple of questions?
• 8:25
  And I'm so I, I've always said no, fuck off.
• 8:28
  No, not like that. I've just said like, I genuinely
• 8:30
  can't because I'm so like, yeah, I don't.
• 8:34
  If someone, if you were to ask me now what the best breakfast
• 8:38
  in London was, yeah, I, I, I thought I wouldn't be able to
• 8:42
  answer. I would like.
• 8:44
  Do they ask you that? That's all that's that's fucking
• 8:47
  top George shit isn't it? Like what's the best pub in
• 8:49
  London? And yeah, all that stuff.
• 8:52
  I'd love to, I'd love to. I tried to a bit about this
• 8:54
  never worked. If what I really think about
• 8:57
  whenever they ask me if I want to do one of those straight into
• 9:01
  videos, I really think about being like, yeah, I'd love to.
• 9:03
  And then when the cameras are rolling, they asked me like this
• 9:05
  like an like an inane question. And then I just turn around and
• 9:09
  like smash my head against the brick wall, like and just
• 9:12
  repeatedly smash my until like a part, like a my head's complete
• 9:15
  mulch. But it's all on the contact.
• 9:18
  Like it's all out there. Like keep.
• 9:19
  Holding them. Yeah, and I'm just, I'm just
• 9:22
  beating my head into pace against the brick wall while
• 9:24
  they asked me. And that's why I can't say yeah.
• 9:28
  I think that's a good strategy. Yeah, I think so too.
• 9:31
  You if you saw that on your For You page, you'd be like, this is
• 9:34
  brilliant. But they're tik toking, right?
• 9:37
  Do you have a TikTok? Do you do the TikTok?
• 9:40
  I've got a couple of TikTok. A younger comic was like, you
• 9:42
  should get it. And obviously he was right and I
• 9:44
  got it and it was useful. I've been told you should be
• 9:48
  doing content 24/7 on TikTok. 24/7.
• 9:54
  But I mean constantly. It's like even more than
• 9:57
  Instagram. Yeah, well, the, that's the, the
• 10:00
  the the container is never full enough.
• 10:02
  That's the problem. You're even kind of at a
• 10:04
  disadvantage doing like a produced podcast because like to
• 10:08
  have like an hour show, it takes you an hour to do a minimum.
• 10:11
  So I should get rid of Kenny? Yeah, I mean that man, you
• 10:14
  should just walk. If you just walked around in the
• 10:15
  street filming yourself like this and saying something stupid
• 10:18
  to. That lifetime?
• 10:20
  Yeah, they what they just want. That's why AI videos are
• 10:23
  everywhere, because you can just press a button and make a 2
• 10:25
  minute video, put it and do that eight times a day.
• 10:27
  Man, that's just what it's. Going to be like forever now.
• 10:30
  Kenny. Get on it, Kenny.
• 10:32
  Take a break. No, I I like this.
• 10:37
  It's still a little bit like a show.
• 10:39
  Yeah, I like that. That's what I I've because I've
• 10:42
  I've noticed all the stuff that I grew up with that I really
• 10:44
  like and I want to emulate doesn't exist anymore.
• 10:47
  Yeah, jarring all the stuff that I was kind of.
• 10:49
  What, like kids shows? No, I was in like when I was
• 10:53
  like getting into comedy. Like the first time I saw
• 10:55
  Netflix was when my friend, my friend and his family on Netflix
• 10:59
  and me and another friend went around to his fat when I was
• 11:01
  like 17 and that was the first time I saw American comedy
• 11:04
  basically. You were so excited.
• 11:06
  I listened to comedy albums. Do you know what I mean?
• 11:08
  I love. Comedy albums.
• 11:10
  I wanted to be on panel shows, and neither of those things
• 11:12
  exist anymore. So it's like, wow, what do you
• 11:13
  do? Yeah, I feel like Charlie
• 11:15
  Chaplin. What?
• 11:17
  Who did you listen to? What?
• 11:18
  Who did you listen to? What albums and stuff like that?
• 11:21
  I remember listening to like Frank Seidbottom C DS when I was
• 11:25
  all like Frank Seidbottom tracks when I was young.
• 11:28
  I remember. Bob Monkhouse.
• 11:31
  Bob Monkhouse, Yeah, I listened to.
• 11:34
  Max Miller I listened to. I actually did listen to a lot
• 11:39
  of like. Now were these your parents
• 11:41
  albums? Some of them were, but I, my mom
• 11:43
  used to do this thing where her parents lived in Birmingham and
• 11:46
  we'd drive there. And if I'd been really well
• 11:48
  behaved, like if I, if I was been a really good boy, we'd
• 11:52
  stop off at like the Oxford services and she'd buy me a like
• 11:55
  a comedy cassette or CD to listen to in the car.
• 11:58
  Oh, that's great. So I picked them and then I
• 12:00
  would pick just some of them were like, I remember one of
• 12:02
  them I picked like a Just for Laughs compilation CD or
• 12:05
  something that had like Della Moran, all these good people
• 12:08
  doing like 5. Daily.
• 12:10
  Which was so good. But one of them was like a
• 12:12
  Jasper Carrot best of CD that I loved that I listened to back,
• 12:15
  like back to front. But so in my head when I started
• 12:18
  comedy, like all I want to start, but like for ages in my
• 12:21
  head, like Jasper Carrot was like one of the greats.
• 12:23
  Yeah. And then when I was a bit older,
• 12:24
  I'd obviously I listened. To he got a rude awakening when
• 12:27
  he masturbated in front of you. That's.
• 12:30
  It I no, that's listen, I don't want to do Jasper.
• 12:35
  Do you like that? But I did see his golden balls
• 12:38
  come on that's not bad. I.
• 12:39
  Listened to Steve Martin a lot. Yeah, Steve Martin, I didn't
• 12:43
  really listen to. I listened to Richard Pryor a
• 12:45
  lot. Yeah, and, and especially when I
• 12:47
  was getting into stand up specifically, I listened to.
• 12:49
  Did you listen to Eddie Murphy? No, not as well.
• 12:52
  I think the the, the specials were the ones I had my like a
• 12:55
  friend introduced me to those, but it was really kind of a it
• 12:58
  was really kind of eclectic. It's just whatever I could get
• 13:00
  my hands. On it's amazing and a lot of.
• 13:04
  Sketch a lot. I listened to a lot of CDs where
• 13:06
  it was like ATV show that had been turned into CD form.
• 13:10
  So like I listened to like episodes of The Vicar of Dibley
• 13:12
  on TV or listen to like Round the Horn CDs or BBC Cut Derek
• 13:15
  and Climb. I love to not necessarily
• 13:17
  listen. Yeah, all sorts of stuff.
• 13:18
  Oh, Derek and Climb. So good.
• 13:20
  We got those. They were like bootleg tastes.
• 13:22
  So good, I've got a couple of the vinyls now.
• 13:25
  Did you ever listen to Cheech and Chong?
• 13:27
  No, these are all before your time.
• 13:29
  Also sort of like. Dating myself.
• 13:31
  American, though, like I was. Not really like nowadays it's
• 13:36
  not as much of like when I started comedy, loads of the
• 13:39
  people I started with what like a bit older than me.
• 13:41
  I'm like obsessed with like American comics and knew them
• 13:44
  excite encyclopedically and stuff.
• 13:46
  But not you, I just. Didn't know anything, like I
• 13:49
  think it's a bit easier now because of like YouTube and
• 13:51
  streaming but most of my exposure to comedy was British
• 13:55
  TV comedy. It's probably better that way.
• 13:57
  I mean, when you started, was there any particular comic you
• 14:01
  sort of styled yourself after? Or not deliberately, but you
• 14:04
  know when you start. You always do.
• 14:06
  Yeah, you don't have your own voice or whatever.
• 14:08
  I imagine there was a lot of like, I imagine there was
• 14:11
  probably quite a lot of like Stuart Lee and how I was
• 14:14
  speaking. But it's like when I started,
• 14:16
  basically everybody was like a bit of Stuart.
• 14:19
  You have a very, you have a very deliberate kind of slow, slower.
• 14:24
  I don't know, I think it's probably just the person I'd
• 14:25
  seen the most at the time. And when you're starting, you
• 14:27
  have no choice but to kind of copy, not copy.
• 14:29
  But like you, you don't know how to do it.
• 14:31
  You know what I mean? Yeah.
• 14:32
  So it's like the the only reference points you have are
• 14:35
  what I've seen on TV. So it's just probably like an
• 14:37
  amount of. But nowadays, new comics, you
• 14:39
  see a lot of people who are like, who have, who are like,
• 14:41
  not not consciously emulating, but like that's they've got a
• 14:46
  similar cadence to like someone like James Acaster, who's been
• 14:48
  big for the last 10 years. Yeah.
• 14:50
  It's just, yeah. Comes out.
• 14:52
  Yeah, just happens to. Well, we have a surprise for
• 14:55
  you. Let's listen to that first gig,
• 14:58
  Kenny. I would it would you have no
• 15:03
  idea how heartbreaking would. You say it yourself, no, but
• 15:08
  most people, because on the podcast most people say their
• 15:13
  first gigs are good, are actually OK.
• 15:18
  It's the second gig that is demoralising.
• 15:22
  My first gig was OK for what it was, but it was rubbish.
• 15:26
  OK. It was an A music open mic when
• 15:29
  me and my friend who was also 19 and had never done comedy before
• 15:33
  asked if we could just get out and do comedy because we wanted
• 15:35
  to find an open mic out to the comedy act so that all the other
• 15:38
  acts were. The guy before me did like a 7
• 15:42
  minute original ballad on his acoustic guitar about how his
• 15:46
  heart was like a vending machine because it it would just give
• 15:50
  like give to anyone. He'd probably done it for years.
• 15:53
  And then I had went up and did my first ever gig.
• 15:56
  And that killed, right? The one before you.
• 15:59
  The vending machine, yeah. Everyone was like, moved to
• 16:01
  tears, you know? What was your first gig like?
• 16:05
  I think it was in Edinburgh. Really.
• 16:08
  I remember people were telling me to go up and then they were
• 16:12
  laughing. Pardon.
• 16:14
  Did you already live over here? No, OK, we, I would lived in
• 16:18
  Chicago and I had an improv group that went over and they
• 16:23
  they said you ought to go up and I said I'm going up.
• 16:26
  And then they were just laughing at how bad I was.
• 16:29
  So I felt like I did OK with that group who were actually
• 16:33
  jeering at me so. Edinburgh's a good place to do
• 16:38
  your first gig. Yeah, because you can.
• 16:40
  You could probably do your second one within an hour of
• 16:42
  doing your like, it's like going to the gym for you just get so
• 16:46
  much better. Exactly.
• 16:47
  I'm never better at comedy than in the first week of September.
• 16:50
  And then I'm. I'm can't tell you how awful I
• 16:53
  am for the rest of the year. Really.
• 16:55
  Yeah. I'm.
• 16:56
  I'm so suck the first week of September I felt like right.
• 17:00
  But you're kind of down on yourself a lot, right?
• 17:03
  You've got to be harsh. You've got to be your own
• 17:04
  harshest critic. It's called the billionaire
• 17:06
  mindset. Really.
• 17:09
  Yeah. How does it work?
• 17:10
  I got my diagnosis last week. OK, It's official.
• 17:13
  I have a billionaire mindset. So if you're a billionaire,
• 17:16
  yeah, you can afford to be critical.
• 17:19
  You have to be, you have to hold yourself to high standards.
• 17:21
  And your standards are so high? Yeah, but the reason I don't
• 17:24
  have a trillionaire mindset is because I have high standards,
• 17:26
  but I don't try and achieve them.
• 17:29
  Right. I'm happy where I am.
• 17:31
  You need a quadrillionaire. Mindset Do you think we'll ever
• 17:34
  see a quadrillionaire rich? Not you and me personally.
• 17:37
  A trillionaire is the next one, right?
• 17:40
  And apparently it's going to be soon.
• 17:42
  Musk. Probably Muskie, I reckon.
• 17:46
  What is he doing? What's?
• 17:47
  He like. This is brought a Paul over the
• 17:52
  whole podcast. Why this?
• 17:54
  This set has three copies of a book called Interior Design
• 17:57
  Masters. I put those there.
• 18:01
  I love them. That's so funny to have like to
• 18:05
  have the part of your interior design be 3 copies of the same
• 18:08
  book about interior. Design.
• 18:09
  We're not here to talk about this, Ed.
• 18:12
  No, You're doing a gig at Soho, right?
• 18:16
  I'm doing my show at Soho Theatre soon, yeah.
• 18:18
  And it's called. Your old makka.
• 18:20
  Your old makka. Yeah, your old Makka.
• 18:23
  Is that I don't really know what that means.
• 18:26
  Means like your your mate means like your friend Maka Maka.
• 18:30
  My granddad used to call me his old Maka and that's why I called
• 18:33
  the show there because I got a couple of jokes about my
• 18:35
  granddad in it. I thought it was like a night.
• 18:37
  I thought it like suited me as a name.
• 18:39
  I find it really hard to come up with names for shows and.
• 18:41
  Stuff I know you got to almost stick with the first one, you
• 18:45
  say? Yeah.
• 18:46
  You know, it's like when you name a group, Yeah.
• 18:48
  And then somebody yells something out and then the other
• 18:51
  person goes. Or it could be this and then
• 18:53
  you're you're off to the races. I had like I had to name because
• 18:57
  I'm the I'm going out to like Australia and New Zealand.
• 19:01
  Name Dropper. Clang.
• 19:03
  Don't know if you guys have ever heard of those countries before,
• 19:06
  but I yeah, I. Tell him I said I will do.
• 19:10
  Yeah, I'll go up to the first person I see at the airport.
• 19:13
  I. Wish.
• 19:14
  Rich says hello. Yeah, and I had the name of the,
• 19:19
  the new shelf in New Zealand that I'm just, so I came out
• 19:21
  with like 3 and they were all ruined.
• 19:23
  And like, I'm editing my special at the moment and I, I now I'm
• 19:27
  like, I want to not put it out because I've seen it so much and
• 19:30
  I've sat with it so much that I hate watching my stuff back
• 19:33
  anyway. Oh, do you know what I mean?
• 19:35
  If I have an idea, I have to immediately tell it to someone
• 19:38
  else, which is not what you're meant to do.
• 19:39
  To, to. And then if they say like,
• 19:42
  that's all right, then you keep. Do you know what I mean?
• 19:44
  Yeah, because I get sick of stuff so fast.
• 19:46
  Well, The thing is, do you, when you've filmed it, do you go
• 19:51
  right into the editing booth or do you give it a couple of
• 19:54
  weeks? It's been in the drawer for like
• 19:56
  a month. OK, that's good.
• 19:57
  We've. Spent so long editing it now
• 19:59
  you've seen every day like like so like so yeah I.
• 20:05
  Just release it. I just got the world.
• 20:07
  Exactly. Exactly.
• 20:09
  Fucked. Yeah, you're brilliant.
• 20:10
  Thanks. Thanks mate, I should let the
• 20:12
  world see my brilliance. Come on, I'm.
• 20:14
  A brilliant air. I've got the brilliant air
• 20:15
  mindset. Yeah, I mean to to keep it to
• 20:19
  yourself would almost be selfish, which is a billionaire
• 20:24
  thing. That is what a billionaire would
• 20:25
  do. Yeah, I've got a, I've got a
• 20:27
  pauper's mindset. It's like when somebody buys.
• 20:30
  I bet like that. Remember that Louvre heist?
• 20:34
  Yeah, I bet there's somebody who bought that privately and like,
• 20:39
  takes friends down in their basement.
• 20:41
  Say this is from the Louvre. This is from the Louvre Highest.
• 20:44
  Yeah. Do you remember when the Mona
• 20:45
  Lisa got stolen? Yeah.
• 20:47
  It's kind of like, I don't really understand why.
• 20:48
  Because you can't really. Like, you can't really sell the
• 20:51
  Mona Lisa, can you? Yeah, because.
• 20:53
  Because everyone will be like, hang on.
• 20:55
  Yeah, that's the Mona Lisa. And this is supposed to be in
• 20:58
  the Louvre. What do you do?
• 21:01
  How did you get this? What's the provenance?
• 21:03
  Well, then that totally has to be underground.
• 21:05
  Yeah, because some billionaire will want to buy it just to have
• 21:09
  it. Yeah, of course, but then it
• 21:11
  also. Like being a big diaper.
• 21:13
  But also it's, yeah, like shitting and pissing and looking
• 21:15
  at the monoliths. Yeah, shit in those are rolling
• 21:18
  around. Yeah.
• 21:21
  Yeah, Like that. That's what I'd do if I ever saw
• 21:24
  such a great piece of iron person.
• 21:26
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. The problem with the Mona Lisa
• 21:28
  is like you, you go in, but it's actually so small and there are
• 21:30
  so many tourists who are just shitting and pissing themselves
• 21:32
  that you can't really get close and.
• 21:34
  Clean up. Yeah, you see, like the the the
• 21:37
  patch of the patch of the floorboards in front of the Mona
• 21:39
  Lisa is stained brown and yellow.
• 21:43
  You had, you did a quick like 3 minutes just on the Mona Lisa,
• 21:47
  Yeah. But now I can't ever.
• 21:49
  But that's never everyone knows this a bit for the podcast or
• 21:52
  I'll cut that out and I'll write it down.
• 21:53
  No, I don't believe that you can.
• 21:56
  Is this me? It's hard to be, it's hard to be
• 21:59
  like the person that buys the Mona Lisa, though, because if,
• 22:02
  like if, if you know, if, if you want to buy the old French
• 22:08
  crown, you can kind of. They take the jewels out.
• 22:12
  But it must be, it's plausible that you, you can like say, oh,
• 22:15
  someone found this old. So they told me they found this
• 22:17
  old French crown and, and, and, and it was buried or something.
• 22:21
  And I just bought it at a market.
• 22:23
  But you OK? You don't have plausible
• 22:25
  deniability when it comes to buying the Mona Lis so that you
• 22:27
  know it's just been stolen. Yeah.
• 22:29
  You you willingly bought stolen goods.
• 22:31
  Yeah. So you'll be in trouble for that
• 22:32
  because that's naughty. Man, you really should flush the
• 22:37
  sound and and do it at the Tuxedo Club or I don't.
• 22:44
  Know is that a real place that used to.
• 22:46
  Exist. I don't know.
• 22:47
  Are you going to ever? Are you going to do a new
• 22:48
  Edinburgh show, do you think? I would love to.
• 22:50
  Why don't you do that? Well, it's coming up, isn't it?
• 22:55
  I'll start now. How often do you gig?
• 22:58
  I do every three months. Maybe.
• 23:01
  Yeah, maybe more. I need to gig more.
• 23:03
  I love to do gigs, I love the idea of doing gigs and I like
• 23:06
  being on stage. But like, but I just like, yeah.
• 23:09
  The mental preparation. I still get really nervous
• 23:13
  before a lot of gigs, I don't know why.
• 23:15
  I think that being in New York, it seems a little easier.
• 23:20
  I don't know why, but do you, you don't live far from the, you
• 23:24
  know, London? Yeah, I live in London, so it's
• 23:26
  kind of easy. Yeah, it's easy.
• 23:28
  I live a little bit of ways. Really.
• 23:31
  Yeah. How far away?
• 23:32
  It's 45 minutes, maybe 40 minutes.
• 23:35
  Yeah, that's tough. Like it's so hard to there's
• 23:37
  like maybe like 3 or 4 like convenience nexuses across the
• 23:41
  UK, Yeah, where you're at the sort of the epicentre of a scene
• 23:45
  or loads and loads of gigs. But especially I don't drive, so
• 23:48
  if I moved anywhere except London it would be harder to gig
• 23:51
  with the frequency at which I gig.
• 23:53
  You know what would be a good idea?
• 23:55
  Because like there are some places that like say they're in
• 23:59
  pubs or something, they have rooms upstairs, comics rent the
• 24:04
  rooms for like a week and justice like gig the shit out of
• 24:08
  that week. Yeah, like, like what's like a
• 24:12
  like a crash diet? Comedy Tourism.
• 24:14
  Yeah, I'd love to just, I love doing like short runs and shit
• 24:17
  like that. Yes.
• 24:18
  Well you get like 3 * a day for a week.
• 24:20
  And you get so much better, like at the end of a festival.
• 24:23
  I feel so like I could do a show anywhere.
• 24:26
  Yeah. But then at the end of it you
• 24:28
  get back to London and you're back to again once every like
• 24:31
  couple of days or whatever number.
• 24:32
  I want to hide behind a Fern. Yeah, I'm rubbish at it.
• 24:35
  Yeah, a phone shaped exactly like me.
• 24:38
  I'm in the shower. What?
• 24:41
  I don't know. It's just like you're all of a
• 24:44
  sudden I just start to revert into.
• 24:46
  Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 24:48
  I feel like, yeah, I just, and also like the I tend to when I
• 24:54
  get back from like a big festival or something, I want to
• 24:57
  hit the ground running. So I tend, but I'm not, I, I
• 24:59
  haven't had the foresight to book in a lot of really high
• 25:03
  quality gigs. So I'm ringing around on it on
• 25:06
  like the afternoon off and then I inevitably end up like my
• 25:09
  first five gigs back are all like, like you.
• 25:13
  Need a Booker? I've got a Booker.
• 25:18
  You need to sit down with that Booker.
• 25:21
  And book the. Shit out of your year.
• 25:23
  I've got like lots of I've got lots of gigs in the diary, but
• 25:26
  I'd like to I like to either. I seem to end either gig like 7
• 25:31
  * a week or like or I want gig for two weeks.
• 25:34
  Do you know what I mean? Yeah, which is not.
• 25:36
  It's just weird. Do you have a goal with your
• 25:38
  gigs? Like eventually I want to do
• 25:40
  blank. This isn't fill in the blanks by
• 25:43
  the way. This is something I've been
• 25:45
  talking to people about because I've never had like.
• 25:48
  Theatres. I love to do theatres, but I've
• 25:50
  never, I've never had like a five year plan.
• 25:53
  Yeah. What, especially China, has it.
• 25:56
  I know, yeah. Shout out to China, obviously,
• 26:00
  but like. We're sponsored by China.
• 26:03
  By this country nice. I'd love to yes, because I I've,
• 26:09
  I've always, I take it. Yeah, I've never really thought
• 26:12
  like. You should say, look, in two
• 26:15
  years I want to be at the, you know, the whatever.
• 26:18
  Yeah, I want to do. Corn Exchange.
• 26:20
  The Hollywood Ball. The Hollywood Ball.
• 26:22
  XA Corn Exchange I have a 100% bomb rate.
• 26:25
  Because what happens? What happens every?
• 26:27
  Single time I'll keep there. You do a soft tour in the US on
• 26:32
  the coasts because they get you there, right They.
• 26:35
  Get me on the coast then. You start because I.
• 26:37
  Don't like a sea creature? Then the yeah, then the next
• 26:42
  time I'm. On the beach.
• 26:43
  Do some more theatre stuff here. People are rolling me back into
• 26:47
  the sea. I'm trying to do my gigs.
• 26:49
  I try to roll me back into the sea.
• 26:52
  There's been a sighting. Sorry, yeah, Then the next time.
• 26:56
  Then you go do some nicer venues here, like bounce off of each
• 27:00
  other. Do you start doing more college
• 27:02
  towns? They get you in the colleges.
• 27:05
  I used to do. I used to think that I remember
• 27:07
  like, Oh no, a friend of mine asked me to open for him at a
• 27:11
  university gig because he was like, well, that's, that's
• 27:14
  you're going to crash. And I died.
• 27:17
  But I bought I bumped so hard and and Kobe died during the
• 27:22
  interval but I don't think it was related.
• 27:24
  Was it all PC? Is that why you think?
• 27:28
  No, it was, no, I just, I think I was shit.
• 27:32
  No, I did a tour and stuff, but it's just like it feels like.
• 27:36
  I I guess I'm, let me rephrase that, maybe a college town.
• 27:40
  Yeah, maybe a college town. I fucked up my first tour.
• 27:43
  I went to Cambridge, but we accidentally bought the tour
• 27:45
  date for when it was like a term break.
• 27:48
  There were no students in the town.
• 27:51
  But it's just weird because all any of my, a 100% of my, what's
• 28:01
  it called like reach is through social media.
• 28:05
  Yeah, and I'm really bad at like posting regularly, which is what
• 28:11
  you have to. Do me too.
• 28:12
  I'm terrible at it. Me too.
• 28:14
  Kenny and I have had a talk about it.
• 28:16
  Yeah, I've talked to those people.
• 28:17
  But like so I've I've got like. But no I, Kenny.
• 28:20
  I've got, I've not talked to Kenny about it, no.
• 28:21
  You will talk to. Thanks.
• 28:23
  I'll talk to Kenny about it. That's all right.
• 28:24
  To Kenny, I just it feels like I don't have like, like the only
• 28:30
  people who know me and would come to my shows are the people
• 28:34
  that follow me on social media and then like, but because I
• 28:37
  don't pass when I do pass, like it doesn't get any seen by
• 28:41
  anyone or any traction. So no one.
• 28:43
  I get it so much where I'll go somewhere to do a gig that I've
• 28:46
  posted about and then I get messages being like, Oh, I
• 28:49
  didn't know you're in X place. It's like, well.
• 28:51
  You get mad. You're posting about it on
• 28:53
  start, but it's just no one's seen it.
• 28:54
  You're posting about it. Yeah, it's not like in the old
• 28:57
  if he, if I was like a rat, if I'd been on like TV loads or
• 29:00
  whatever, you could just. It's the TV.
• 29:03
  You just put my poster up into town and people would recognise.
• 29:06
  As seen an 8 out of 10 cats, you just got to get on one of those.
• 29:09
  Exactly, I've got to be the 8th cat.
• 29:12
  You should. Do a residency somewhere.
• 29:14
  Where? I don't know, but go to a place
• 29:18
  that has a lot of comics because I think over time, I think
• 29:21
  comics like you, I hear I'm talking out of my you know, but
• 29:27
  I'm just, I'm just talking, you know, right.
• 29:29
  Well, but they they like you. And then they'll come to say at
• 29:33
  night, you've got a lot of lot of cred you get, you start doing
• 29:37
  gigs. It'll just as opposed to doing a
• 29:42
  tour where it's like, say I go to Los Angeles and it's like one
• 29:45
  or two gigs. You you don't get a good
• 29:48
  impression. I'd love to go to New York at
• 29:50
  some point. Kind of like, like, you know,
• 29:53
  like it is kind of like a, a nucleus for comedy, like, no
• 29:58
  matter who you are, I suppose. Like I don't like America isn't
• 30:01
  the centre of my comedy. It doesn't have solar.
• 30:04
  System, but I would love to you kind of like it feels like
• 30:06
  there's a missing piece and I haven't done it.
• 30:08
  Problem is for a guy like me, I would probably need like a
• 30:11
  patron or something to go out. Like I got an offer for a run in
• 30:14
  New York last like a theatre last year or the year before,
• 30:19
  but like I just couldn't do it because it was not it was this
• 30:25
  is what's called like a loss leader.
• 30:26
  Is that what you call it? Like I, I I would have to
• 30:28
  finance it myself. So it's basically like, although
• 30:31
  I would have loved to do it, I just couldn't afford to do it.
• 30:33
  Some comedy festivals. It's like they pay you to fly
• 30:36
  out and they pay your hotel. At least you know.
• 30:38
  Ed Knight needs a patron if you would like to patronise Ed.
• 30:43
  I'd love that. Please write into our e-mail.
• 30:46
  We're going to put it down there.
• 30:47
  Nice, because the problem is we don't have any like.
• 30:51
  You remember like a Mozart was like a patriot.
• 30:54
  I'm yeah, like. Esther Hazi.
• 30:57
  Or like a like a Victorian style.
• 30:59
  I'd love someone who's just really fucking rich.
• 31:01
  Like a rich spinster. Comedian.
• 31:04
  Yeah, yeah, to pay me the. Balloon.
• 31:06
  This is me. Yeah, why don't they do that?
• 31:10
  I don't know. I think it's probably, you know,
• 31:13
  trickle down economics. Well, I was just listening to
• 31:15
  the I'm waiting for a tour. Like in college, like football,
• 31:19
  they have boosters, like they have alums that just pour money
• 31:23
  into the sports programme. Yeah, why don't they do the same
• 31:26
  thing for like you? See, that's if Jimmy Carl went.
• 31:29
  I wouldn't mind if he went to Saudi Arabia or whatever, if
• 31:31
  he's pumping that money back into the scene, but he's not.
• 31:33
  He's building AWH Smith in his basement.
• 31:35
  That's what I've heard. He is.
• 31:37
  Yeah, apparently he's got a Starbucks in his basement.
• 31:39
  Who's? Going to buy it, Who's going to
• 31:41
  go in? There, No.
• 31:42
  I think it's just for him. I think he's got a Starbucks in
• 31:44
  his basement that's just for him.
• 31:46
  Man, that's. What?
• 31:47
  And that's what I heard. And you can't say that I didn't
• 31:49
  hear that. No, it it makes sense though
• 31:55
  that we have patrons. Yeah, it should.
• 31:58
  I I would love to have a pay. I'd love to have someone wealthy
• 32:00
  just finance my my entire life and I just make a heart as as
• 32:04
  recompense. You know, well see, because
• 32:08
  right now we have agents, but they just take the money.
• 32:11
  Yeah, I want someone to give me money, not take the money.
• 32:13
  Yeah, yeah. And that's why, that's why the
• 32:15
  industry sort of got it confused, I think.
• 32:17
  Yeah, because instead of having people give me money, I've got
• 32:20
  people who sort of take the money away.
• 32:21
  I like what you're saying. What is going on here with the
• 32:25
  air, do you know? I don't know.
• 32:31
  I love that. I love the graphic.
• 32:33
  You've got where the where the like the microphone is.
• 32:36
  It sounds like you've turned it up.
• 32:38
  Yeah. Yeah, the way the microphone
• 32:41
  like input is your head, I really like that.
• 32:44
  You like it? I really like.
• 32:46
  It Dave Brown did that. Do you know Dave Brown?
• 32:48
  I. Don't know, Be on the back of
• 32:49
  it, right? Is there a thing like a cold
• 32:54
  that you can just RIP it? I think it's off now.
• 32:56
  Sorry everybody. That's such a great shot, just
• 32:59
  haven't you trying to turn off like a humidifier, dehumidifier?
• 33:07
  Beautiful now. That would be brilliant.
• 33:09
  That's the sort of stuff I love. Like I'd love to.
• 33:12
  I'd love to make a film of you where I just, it's like an hour
• 33:15
  long film and it the room is full of electrical equipment and
• 33:18
  the camera stays in one place and it's just you trying to
• 33:21
  figure out how to turn off all the electrical equipment.
• 33:23
  Yeah. Would that be a brilliant film?
• 33:25
  Well, what about with you? You have to do admin.
• 33:28
  Oh fuck. And we have all these papers
• 33:30
  scattered on the desk. And I have to do what here's if
• 33:33
  it's crunch time, if it's really necessary, I can do admin.
• 33:37
  Yeah, but I much prefer to make This is My Prime.
• 33:40
  Much prefer to make an hour long film about you trying to turn
• 33:42
  off different pieces of electrical.
• 33:44
  All right, all right. Yeah.
• 33:47
  How are you about writing? Like in the course of the day,
• 33:50
  do you just kind of come up with stuff or?
• 33:53
  Yeah, I'm trying to get more disciplined with it.
• 33:54
  Yeah, because especially like when I've got deadlines, I'm
• 33:58
  really good at it and I it happens in fits and starts, but
• 34:03
  I'm trying to do like fucking morning pages and all that
• 34:06
  stuff. Oh, the artist's way and all.
• 34:09
  That I don't know what that is, but just like write every day.
• 34:13
  Oh, yeah, Like, you have a certain time.
• 34:15
  Yeah. Do you have a sunlight?
• 34:17
  And then you just sit in a coffee shop.
• 34:20
  And try and write 10 for 10 minutes or whatever.
• 34:22
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. In a diaper shitting and pissing
• 34:27
  my pants. That's the billionaire mindset.
• 34:30
  Yeah, they're pouring the coffee into my garlic and it's coming
• 34:33
  straight out like a water slide. But do you find that that works?
• 34:39
  I this is what I find is if I'm sitting down for an hour, I, I
• 34:45
  can't come up with anything. And then the last five minutes,
• 34:48
  yeah, I'm like, oh. I'll tell you there was one
• 34:53
  year. No, I know what you mean.
• 34:55
  There was one year like where maybe not 2024.
• 34:59
  Before my show, I was fairly consistent with doing morning
• 35:04
  pages and writing ideas and free writing and that stuff.
• 35:07
  Then after that Fringe show was completed, I went back to the
• 35:12
  notebook that I used and I looked through all the there.
• 35:15
  Was shit on it. It was covered in shit in this.
• 35:17
  Yeah, Wouldn't you know it? I'd drawn the Mona Lisa
• 35:20
  perfectly in the book. I, No, I am, I went back to look
• 35:25
  at all the like the free writing paragraphs that I've done for
• 35:28
  like 5 or 10 minutes at a time to see how much of it I ended up
• 35:31
  using. And maybe in like half a dozen
• 35:35
  of them, there was a premise that I ended up later making
• 35:37
  into like a short bit. But none of them were my, none
• 35:42
  of them were like killer bits that I, that I kept in the, in
• 35:45
  the repertoire. And in fact, in retrospect, I
• 35:49
  think that what I was doing was. Getting the bad stuff out.
• 35:56
  No, not even that. I think like just, you know, by
• 36:00
  doing something like that, you can kind of say that you have
• 36:05
  written or whatever or like or not like or feeling.
• 36:08
  It felt like maybe productive at the time, but actually wasn't,
• 36:11
  you know what I mean? What, what that obviously what
• 36:14
  you need to do is the which is really hard is just sit down and
• 36:18
  think about it and work hard for a really long time.
• 36:20
  Like all these hacks are really attractive that like if you
• 36:23
  could just sort of like empty your ego and get rid of it and
• 36:26
  then just sit down and free ride for 10 minutes a day and you'll
• 36:28
  come up with like some some great stuff, but it's not so
• 36:33
  you're. Saying it's quality, not the
• 36:35
  quantity. I think so, yeah.
• 36:37
  I think free writing is good if you're like if, if you don't
• 36:40
  really have like an outlet for something or you're not using it
• 36:43
  as like a means to like an end. But if you're like a, if you're
• 36:48
  like a, like a composer and you have to finish a Symphony, don't
• 36:53
  sit down and just fucking twat the keyboard with your head for
• 36:56
  10 minutes in the morning every day.
• 36:58
  Work on the Symphony. Well, that's what I find is
• 37:01
  that. That's how I seem, yeah.
• 37:02
  The. Free writing doesn't always do
• 37:05
  do what you want. It's the more you start to
• 37:07
  shape. It's like, oh, I'm writing
• 37:09
  about, you know, I can't even write what I'm.
• 37:16
  I'm writing about writing. Yeah.
• 37:18
  And and the more you focus in on it, the more you can you can
• 37:23
  come up with material. Yeah, it's if kind of we're
• 37:27
  lucky because we got built into our job a really good way of
• 37:32
  kind of recreating that like like on like a podcast or
• 37:40
  something when you're on the spot, when when you're on stage,
• 37:44
  you can just like talk. You know what?
• 37:47
  When I'm on stage, I. You come alive.
• 37:51
  Yeah, or, or like, you know, because there's that thing of
• 37:54
  like, I don't know if this is the reason, but if, you know,
• 37:56
  you have to get off really quick, so your brain sort of
• 37:59
  starts over clocking. You know, I come up with stuff
• 38:01
  on stage or when I'm like chatting to friends that I would
• 38:04
  never come up with by just staring at my book for, for 10
• 38:08
  hours on my own. It's true.
• 38:09
  But. And that's kind of what the free
• 38:11
  writing is meant to do, but you just do it on stage because
• 38:13
  that's. But you know what I mean?
• 38:14
  Yeah. Or sometimes I don't know, I
• 38:16
  just don't fucking write anymore.
• 38:18
  Something will happen to me in my boring life and my shit of my
• 38:21
  pathetic, wretched life and I'll I'll just say it.
• 38:24
  And then if someone laughs, I'll stop saying it.
• 38:28
  If someone laughs, I'll keep saying it, and if nobody laughs,
• 38:30
  I'll stop saying it. So if that's true, you should
• 38:33
  record everything. Everything I mean you.
• 38:35
  I've been recording this gigs and.
• 38:37
  Stuff. I've started doing it.
• 38:38
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I used to record them and then
• 38:39
  never listened back to them. I know, I know.
• 38:41
  What I do now, this is so fucking stupid.
• 38:43
  Every like comics who've seen me do this on my phone have flank,
• 38:49
  you know, when someone looks at you different.
• 38:51
  Yeah, what I do is I will like, I'll show you, I'll like, take
• 39:01
  pictures of, I'll like, write my material on my hand and then
• 39:05
  take pictures of the hand, right?
• 39:08
  So then I've got like, I've got like albums on my phone full of
• 39:11
  pictures of the back of my hand so that I can remember it for
• 39:14
  the next time. Oh, but that's your set list.
• 39:16
  Yeah. But then if I like, if something
• 39:18
  happens or I tweak something, then I jump him in.
• 39:21
  Yeah, Yeah. It's like if you were to put all
• 39:23
  those pictures of my hand together and like and like, you
• 39:26
  know, there's one second a day transformations, yes, you'd see
• 39:30
  like everything moving around and.
• 39:32
  That's great. That's your content.
• 39:35
  It's. Pretty stupid.
• 39:36
  Yeah, yeah. How do you write?
• 39:39
  Well, I kind of what I like to do is just get ideas, write them
• 39:47
  down, and then I look at that, I wait till that list gets really
• 39:50
  big and then I try to flesh them out, which means try to remember
• 39:54
  what the hell I was thinking. And then sometimes I find the
• 40:01
  work in progress, like an hour, I can just flesh those lives.
• 40:07
  And the more I do that, like sometimes it'll be like this
• 40:10
  works. Which is rare.
• 40:13
  And then other times it's like, well, I just didn't say it
• 40:16
  right, but it's a good idea. Yeah, that fucking pisses me
• 40:19
  sometimes. It's like lightning in a bottle.
• 40:21
  But if I have an I have an idea in the moment and I have to
• 40:24
  write it down straight away. If I even wait like 5 minutes
• 40:28
  I'll like this happens all the time where I'll say something to
• 40:32
  like my girlfriend or a friend while we're writing and then 5
• 40:34
  minutes later I'll go back to write it down and I'll I'll it
• 40:38
  would have been worded in a slightly different way that I
• 40:40
  can't remember. I'm always asking how did how
• 40:41
  exactly did I say that that made it funny and then I've forgotten
• 40:44
  it and then it's useless. And then you get mad at the
• 40:46
  birth. How did I?
• 40:47
  I didn't say it that way. Yeah.
• 40:49
  Fuck you. No, I didn't like that.
• 40:52
  Or, but that's. Give me a copy.
• 40:54
  That, yeah, was that, was that toucan or was that?
• 40:57
  Real. I have it, yeah.
• 40:59
  I like to do at all work in progresses because it's a live
• 41:02
  like, you know what I mean? You can't really practise it or
• 41:05
  simulate it until you're up there.
• 41:06
  Where do you do the? I mean, I know a couple of
• 41:09
  places, but now it's hard. But I've noticed when I when I
• 41:14
  came back here, I was away for a bit and I came back.
• 41:17
  All of a sudden people are doing these work in progresses and I
• 41:21
  think this is the best thing since marmalade.
• 41:27
  No, I mean, it's really good. You're a big Marmalade fan, yes.
• 41:31
  What? Why?
• 41:32
  Paddington. You like Paddington.
• 41:34
  You just like Paddington. No, but you know what I mean.
• 41:37
  It's like. Hanging out on the train
• 41:38
  platform, no trousers on, eating food from under your hat.
• 41:45
  He does that. He's a.
• 41:46
  Person doing that and not a bear you'd there'd be like a SWAT
• 41:49
  team around him within 30 seconds use.
• 41:51
  It use that no pants. Yeah, no shoes, no trousers, no
• 41:58
  underwear. Yeah, the.
• 42:01
  Pigeons wouldn't go there and they'd be like.
• 42:03
  What was my point? I guess a.
• 42:05
  Work in progresses. Yeah, how?
• 42:07
  How? But this is the problem I did
• 42:12
  was somebody offered me to headline and I wasn't even
• 42:16
  ready. I should have done some work in
• 42:18
  progresses when I got back here and I bombed the holy hell out
• 42:23
  of it. Yeah, I have to, like I've got
• 42:28
  one on Sunday coming up and I just, I don't have a like an
• 42:33
  hour of new stuff. That's kind of how I like to do
• 42:35
  it. Like I like to the hour to
• 42:39
  crystallise just before it has to be done properly for the
• 42:43
  first time. Like I and I think even if I had
• 42:45
  all the time in the, if I had one work in progress or I had
• 42:48
  1000, it would be the same way. Oh, really?
• 42:50
  Yeah, I don't think I hate the idea of doing the exact same
• 42:54
  show word for word every time. No, I yeah.
• 42:57
  And it's just not fun for me. But I like, yeah, I'll, I'll, I
• 43:02
  like going up there with maybe like 10 minutes of scripted
• 43:05
  stuff and then finding out the rest of the show.
• 43:07
  And what about the Segways do you like to?
• 43:10
  I don't use. I don't segue really.
• 43:12
  OK. So that's not a problem for me.
• 43:14
  OK. So.
• 43:15
  You're you have no problem with whatever 2 jokes there are,
• 43:19
  you'll tie them together somehow.
• 43:21
  Oh, in between bits I don't say what I like, but in between
• 43:25
  jokes I'll try and like whatever's quickest basically,
• 43:28
  or whatever's the most concise. Yeah, sometimes I friends have
• 43:32
  told me that like I lose people in the train of thought.
• 43:37
  So I've been trying to get better at like explaining my
• 43:40
  thought process between between set up and punch lines so
• 43:45
  there's at least some cause and effect that doesn't just sound
• 43:47
  like a non sequitur. You know what that's like?
• 43:50
  That's like in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?
• 43:52
  They want you to talk through your process like, well, Pontius
• 43:57
  Pilot was alive then. Yeah.
• 43:59
  And they don't want you to just sit there and go.
• 44:01
  Oh, I know the. Answer Pontius Pilot.
• 44:03
  Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I know the answer is
• 44:05
  Pontius Pilot. Yeah, so.
• 44:08
  Is it? Is any.
• 44:11
  Kenny, actually, can you, can you do some?
• 44:13
  Can you read out some Who wants to be a millionaire questions to
• 44:15
  us? I want to, I want to because I
• 44:17
  think you're a smart cookie. I want to see.
• 44:19
  I want to see how smart you really.
• 44:20
  Are say that. I think you're a smart I'll be
• 44:22
  Chris Tarrant. No, Kenny, you'll be Chris
• 44:24
  Tarrant. You'll be the contestant and
• 44:26
  I'll be the guy coughing in the crowd.
• 44:28
  So what that really happened? Yeah, the coffee major.
• 44:33
  Yeah. I, I don't know.
• 44:34
  I don't. I don't really.
• 44:36
  Sometimes I think. What are you doing right now?
• 44:39
  Sorry, I'm scratching my arm. I'm just having a wash.
• 44:46
  I sometimes I think that I can explain whenever I get asked
• 44:51
  questions like that all, all it really clarifies for me is that
• 44:53
  I actually don't know. I don't really have a way.
• 44:56
  I don't know how I write or what I think about comedy.
• 44:59
  You know what I mean? I think it's kind of like.
• 45:01
  Maybe that's your blessing. Every time I try and explain
• 45:03
  something or I think I've got like a like a an answer that
• 45:07
  explains something about the industry or comedy, I'd it makes
• 45:10
  me realise I'm actually kind of talking shit and getting a bit
• 45:12
  farther away for the more I talk, the further away I.
• 45:14
  Get right you know, that's why some people don't like these
• 45:17
  process type talks. Sometimes I just I don't, I've
• 45:21
  been doing this for such a long time now some and I sort of
• 45:23
  think like. How long?
• 45:26
  Like 11 years. So every time I do a show, I'm
• 45:29
  like, so how did I do the last one?
• 45:31
  Do you know what I mean? Everyone, if I start writing a
• 45:33
  new one, I'm like I've managed to write 6 shows without without
• 45:39
  realising it. Yeah, do you know what I mean?
• 45:42
  But some people are very anal about doing this.
• 45:46
  Show this worked out with this, this, add this and then they go.
• 45:51
  Now I have the hour. My process like used to be very
• 45:56
  meticulous like that and to be honest, I think I was the worst
• 45:59
  comedian for it. Because it's admin.
• 46:01
  Not yet, because it's admin. I mean no, it's just I would be
• 46:04
  like I would be really clinical. I would be like, how can I fit
• 46:07
  this into here? And then like a joke.
• 46:08
  That was fucking really route one would be like good enough,
• 46:11
  you know, like that would be like if X was Y.
• 46:15
  Do you know what I mean? So, and it was so kind of
• 46:18
  formulaic and like didn't fit like you know what I mean?
• 46:21
  You know that I find that. Not, not not to be.
• 46:24
  That sounds like I'm slagging off other types of, but you know
• 46:26
  what I mean. But that's.
• 46:28
  OK, It's just like it was just kind of, I look back at some of
• 46:30
  the old stuff and I can really tell, to me, I can really tell
• 46:33
  what I'm trying to fill in a gap because of the type of, you know
• 46:35
  what I mean? But do you know what I find too?
• 46:38
  It's kind of similar when I I would write a one person show
• 46:41
  sometimes and I'd script it and then I'd realise the reason why
• 46:46
  I'm messing up this part is because I don't like it and I'm
• 46:49
  not into it or I'm not remembering it.
• 46:53
  Yeah, because it's shit. Yeah, I've never done, I've
• 46:56
  never done like 1 the same way like I've never like there's
• 47:00
  some bits that I I just sometimes I go too far one way
• 47:03
  or too far the other way. Like I don't there's some bits
• 47:06
  that are like script exactly and some bits that I never really
• 47:08
  write down in one certain way, you know what I mean?
• 47:11
  But then I, I, I don't know. I just guess it depends on how I
• 47:15
  feel. I think I got too, too much.
• 47:17
  Yeah, it just depends on how I feel.
• 47:18
  So on the count of three, we quit.
• 47:20
  Yes, 123. Yeah, I'd love to.
• 47:23
  I'd love if you could be my my second in like a samurai style
• 47:26
  self execution. Yes, I'd love to commit
• 47:29
  sepulchre on your podcast. I'd do it cross style and you
• 47:32
  can cut off my head very swiftly.
• 47:33
  You're supposed to do it that way.
• 47:35
  Yeah, I think there's a couple of ways you can do it.
• 47:37
  I think you can do like up and down.
• 47:38
  I think you do just across. I think you can maybe do a
• 47:41
  square. We couldn't get a good angle
• 47:43
  though. I'm.
• 47:43
  Going to do the cool S you know that cool S.
• 47:48
  Man, we always talk about this. Now there's a portion, I don't
• 47:56
  know if you've seen this or heard it.
• 47:58
  I I do called fill in the blank. You have to fill in the.
• 48:02
  It's not blankety blank. OK, And you don't have to be
• 48:06
  funny. OK, OK, just five questions.
• 48:08
  That makes sense. Good to hear and.
• 48:11
  This. I tailor it to you.
• 48:13
  I have an Ed night written down here, thank you.
• 48:15
  On average, I am at the height of my mental and physical powers
• 48:20
  at blank o'clock. Is this for you or for me?
• 48:23
  You. For me.
• 48:32
  You're thinking, Yeah, you can talk through your thinking.
• 48:37
  I like I like to stay up I think late later at night, but the
• 48:40
  truth is probably early in the morning.
• 48:42
  But like I never which. Is late as well.
• 48:45
  It depends on where you are on the planet, yeah.
• 48:47
  Or if you're maybe like a nocturnal animal.
• 48:49
  So like 6:00? In the evening.
• 48:53
  No. I'd say maybe 10:00 PM is when
• 48:55
  I'm at the high of my hours. Yeah, well, that's when you're
• 48:57
  probably gigging. Yeah, or just like after a gig
• 49:00
  or whatever. 10:00 PM. Let's go with 10:00 PM.
• 49:02
  When's your Melbourne show? Is this one of the blanks?
• 49:05
  No, my Melbourne show's at 9:00 PM.
• 49:08
  My Melbourne show is at blank o'clock. 9:00 PM No, that's.
• 49:12
  Perfect. Yeah.
• 49:13
  But it because it's an 11 hour time difference, it will feel
• 49:16
  like it's 10 AM for me. So it's the opposite of actually
• 49:19
  where I want to. Yeah, you didn't think about
• 49:21
  that? Did you Blank is the most
• 49:24
  feminine thing I've done this week.
• 49:27
  Blank is the most feminine thing I've done this way, so you.
• 49:31
  Fill in the. Alpha.
• 49:37
  What's the most feminine? What's?
• 49:38
  Well, to give me an idea of what you're thinking, I wasn't
• 49:43
  expecting like a gender binary based grilling.
• 49:46
  Oh, OK. No, it's what, what, what do
• 49:50
  you, what in your head, what would you say is the most
• 49:53
  feminine thing you've done this with?
• 49:54
  Just to give me a bit of guidance.
• 49:55
  Me. Yeah.
• 49:57
  Oh, I put in AI. Guess I put in some eyebrow
• 50:04
  highlighter. Oh, eyebrow highlighter.
• 50:08
  Yeah, OK. I.
• 50:09
  Guess I don't know if that's feminine or no.
• 50:14
  What did? What's the most feminine thing I
• 50:15
  did? This, I mean, makeup's pretty
• 50:17
  basic. Like that's not it's no.
• 50:22
  Oh, I have a pair of I have a pair of jeans that I think are
• 50:24
  women's jeans. I wore those this week.
• 50:26
  OK, so I will. How about that?
• 50:28
  That's fine, I think that wasn't a good question.
• 50:30
  I think they're women's jeans because the pockets are so
• 50:32
  shallow. Yeah, it's really annoying
• 50:34
  because I put, I put I love the the fit of the jeans.
• 50:37
  It's unbelievable. But the trade off is that like
• 50:41
  sometimes with men's jeans, with men's clothes in general, like
• 50:44
  it's. Too tight.
• 50:45
  Or you just look like you're wearing a sack.
• 50:47
  Do you know what I mean? You're too tight or it feels
• 50:49
  like you're wearing a sack made of denim.
• 50:51
  These women's jeans are amazing but the trade off is the pockets
• 50:54
  associate. But the fit man, if it fits, I
• 50:57
  love it. I would have to say Blank is the
• 51:00
  best villain I've watched in the movies.
• 51:04
  The best villain I've watched in the movies.
• 51:07
  Oh, villains. Now, the thing about villains is
• 51:10
  they are really naughty, but sometimes they're compelling.
• 51:13
  Yes. Yeah, they.
• 51:15
  Have to be. I watched a film this week
• 51:17
  called Sentimental Value, and I wouldn't say that Stalin
• 51:20
  Skarsgard is the He's the closest thing to a villain in
• 51:23
  the movie that he's really good at.
• 51:25
  The whole movie is really good. What's?
• 51:27
  It called. A sentimental value.
• 51:29
  OK guys, watch that. What?
• 51:32
  What villain movies have I seen where the villain is really
• 51:35
  good? Well, I mean silence of the.
• 51:37
  Lambs, Silence of the Lambs. Oh shit, You know, I watched for
• 51:39
  the first time Night of the Hunter Robert Mitchum in that
• 51:44
  he's unbelievable. He's he's.
• 51:46
  Hunting somebody. He's hunting some some people,
• 51:48
  but he's like, so he's so, so good at the moment.
• 51:51
  I would say Robert Mitchum bizarre in Knight of the Hunter.
• 51:53
  What a what a screen villain he was.
• 51:55
  Watch that everybody have. You seen it?
• 51:58
  I think along I took a film class once and we had to see it.
• 52:02
  That's really, really good. Yeah, the most confusing place
• 52:06
  to do stand up is. Most confusing blank.
• 52:15
  You thinking like geographically or like a venue or something?
• 52:19
  It can be anything. Or maybe the first thing I think
• 52:22
  of is I do slight loads of gigs in like in like, you know, like
• 52:28
  I've done gigs in like Nordic countries and Benelux, Benelux
• 52:31
  countries and stuff. And the gigs are always to like
• 52:35
  an English speaking audience or whatever.
• 52:37
  But I always have a really hard time forgetting to take out like
• 52:42
  reference or like even in Australia or whatever idioms
• 52:46
  and. Locations.
• 52:48
  And references like to types of like to places or shops or yeah,
• 52:53
  like areas of London or whatever.
• 52:55
  Yeah. To where I'll say something
• 52:58
  like, and then everyone will give you a blank stare.
• 53:00
  I'm like, oh, I, oh, I, I forgot you're not all from South
• 53:04
  London. As well.
• 53:05
  So that's why I understand that, yeah.
• 53:08
  But that's maybe that's confusing because I always
• 53:10
  forget to do it and then I find out the hard way in the moment.
• 53:13
  And then sometimes if you change the word, it doesn't make it as
• 53:17
  funny. It sounds like you might.
• 53:19
  Yeah, it sounds like you're fucking you're.
• 53:21
  It sounds like you're such like a pathetic little, like
• 53:24
  snivelling. If I do a routine, if I had a
• 53:28
  routine about Tesco and I changed it to Coles just because
• 53:31
  I was in Australia, Yeah, just fucking kill me because there's
• 53:33
  no like, that's so pathetic. They know that I'm not from
• 53:36
  there. They know that this routine
• 53:37
  isn't about Coles. Do you know what I mean?
• 53:39
  Yeah. Yeah, fuck that.
• 53:40
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 53:41
  No way. Tesco's.
• 53:42
  Tesco's. Yeah, I like.
• 53:45
  Apparently it's called Tesco because it was founded by a man
• 53:47
  called Terry. Did you know that?
• 53:48
  Terry? Is that true, Jamie?
• 53:50
  Can we check that? Last one other than stand up, my
• 53:55
  parents are most proud of me for blank.
• 54:05
  Maybe my admin skills. OK, no, my, my eyebrow, my mom
• 54:11
  says. I've she thinks I've got really
• 54:13
  nice eyebrows. You have good.
• 54:14
  Eyebrows. Thanks mate.
• 54:16
  So do you. You've got nice, You've got nice
• 54:17
  eyebrows. I'd say maybe that, yeah, maybe
• 54:21
  my like I'm quite good at, like I think I'm quite good at like
• 54:27
  doing admin in serious situations.
• 54:30
  So maybe I'm admin in serious situations when it's crunch
• 54:35
  time. All right.
• 54:37
  What do you think your parents are most proud of about you?
• 54:40
  Comedy. Other than comedy, probably the
• 54:44
  fact that I did law for a bit. What type of law?
• 54:48
  They would have liked me to do more of that.
• 54:51
  What type of law did you? Do well.
• 54:53
  I was going to go into entertainment law, but they
• 54:55
  didn't know. That what like IP or like or
• 54:58
  like. Yeah, copyright.
• 55:00
  Okay, yeah, yeah. But Speaking of career, though,
• 55:03
  this is the portion of the show where you can plug whatever you
• 55:07
  want. You're doing your Soho show.
• 55:09
  Soho Theatre in Melbourne and Sydney and New Zealand.
• 55:12
  Go buy tickets for those. So Soho is.
• 55:15
  March, Melbourne, March to April, Sydney, April, New
• 55:19
  Zealand, May and my special's coming out on YouTube, so watch
• 55:22
  that if you want to see me do stand.
• 55:24
  Up. Watch this dude.
• 55:26
  He's hilarious. And let's do a show, man, we
• 55:29
  should do a show, a new material show.
• 55:31
  OK, I'd like. Yeah, I'd love that.
• 55:33
  You set it up, do the admin and I'll jump on.
• 55:36
  It have you seen one of the, have you seen those videos where
• 55:38
  like where it's like 2 guys they will like do like endurance
• 55:42
  pranks on each other? Yeah.
• 55:44
  So it's like, so it's like they take turns hitting each other's
• 55:47
  finger with a hammer or pulling back a resistance band really
• 55:50
  far and snapping each other in the face.
• 55:51
  Yeah, we should do that at the gig where like if I'm on set, if
• 55:54
  one of my jokes bombs you like you like smack me really hard
• 55:57
  with a cane round the round. The back end until it works,
• 55:59
  yeah. If one of my jokes like that, so
• 56:02
  there's Jeopardy, you know what I mean?
• 56:03
  So like I've, you've got like a massive rubber band that's like
• 56:06
  around my, my waist or something.
• 56:07
  And then if one of my drugs bombs, you snap it back and it
• 56:10
  like really hurts. But we have to be in a diaper.
• 56:12
  Yeah, we do. Yeah, if you want, we have to
• 56:17
  the two giant, 2 giant babies. Maybe we could have a double act
• 56:20
  called 2 giant babies. It's a deal.
• 56:22
  Wow, there's a lot to soak in there, so let's go home and soak
• 56:27
  it up. You're probably already home
• 56:30
  anyway. Let's not talk about you in the
• 56:33
  bathtub. Who brought that up?
• 56:35
  I did catch you later. Right?
• 56:39
  Bye. Don't go.
• 56:56
  Rich vultures talk box.