Latest / Unshakeable with Human Design - A Human Design For Business Podcast / 349 - Embody Your Highest Self by Transforming Your Style w/Chellie Carlson 2/4 Emotional Generator
Transcript
- 0:01Nicole Laino: Welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, the show dedicated
- 0:05to helping entrepreneurs use human design to shift from hustle to
- 0:09flow without sacrificing results.
- 0:11Come here to become an unshakeable human and build an unshakeable business
- 0:15according to your human design.
- 0:17I'm your host, Nicole Laino.
- 0:22Hello and welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, everybody.
- 0:26I'm your host, Nicole Laino, and I am so thrilled to be here with
- 0:33my guest, Shelly Carlson today.
- 0:35Shelly is actually somebody I met, it's actually only been a little
- 0:38bit over a year, but It feels like longer that we've known each other.
- 0:42I spoke in a mastermind that you were a part of.
- 0:44And I'm just gonna, I'm gonna brag on you a little bit here because I've watched
- 0:48this Ascension that you've had, and I've watched this growth journey you've been
- 0:53on and you are, while you are a personal stylist, you are so much more than that
- 1:01and that's what I really feel has come through in this year plus that I've
- 1:06known you and I've been watching you.
- 1:08Now I'm also a member of your Style Society membership, which we're going to
- 1:11talk about in, in a little while because I'm gonna, I'm gonna rave about that too.
- 1:15Because honestly what you've done, I've always liked clothes, but I
- 1:20relied on brands and I, I'm not going to say that I always loved my body.
- 1:25I've never had a weight problem, but I, had big boobs from the time I was a kid
- 1:30and we're going to talk about body image.
- 1:32But what you've done in your membership, I've been in the membership pretty
- 1:35much the whole time I've known you.
- 1:36I joined pretty much right away.
- 1:38And So I've been in it for a year and you give these great style boards and
- 1:42you give such great advice, not just on like, Oh, here's what's trending now.
- 1:46Like you can get on a YouTube video, you get formulas for how to dress.
- 1:52Us how to dress our body and that has changed my whole relationship with my
- 1:57clothes the way that I shop Um, I use your suggestions, but i'm also able to
- 2:03be online My christmas list this year was so different because I was like, these
- 2:07are the pieces that I need These are the accessories that I feel like i'm missing
- 2:11from the look that I want to create For me, not because the magazine told me to.
- 2:17And I just wanted to, I just wanted to say that that's, we're going to talk
- 2:21about all of it today, but thank you because it's made me feel more empowered
- 2:26in my own body, in my own style, in the way that I represent myself.
- 2:30And that can't be understated how important that is.
- 2:34So thank you and welcome to the show.
- 2:38Chellie Carlson: Thank you.
- 2:38I'm so excited to be here
- 2:41Nicole Laino: And I also want to say that you are a 2 4 emotional generator
- 2:45and you are the incarnation cross of the vessel of love, which at the
- 2:48end of the episode, I'm going to get to what that all means, because when
- 2:53I see people really living true to their design gets me super excited.
- 2:57And I want to highlight some of that.
- 2:58So if you're listening to this and you are a vessel of love, you're a
- 3:01generator, you're a 2 4, we're going to go into all of that and how Shelly is
- 3:05really using this in her brand without necessarily knowing what , what you're
- 3:10doing, it's just coming through you.
- 3:12Why?
- 3:13Because you've done obviously inner work, you have reflected on
- 3:16yourself and you're stepping into your highest version of yourself.
- 3:19And that happens to be very aligned with your chart.
- 3:22So I'm gonna, I'm gonna call out some of that stuff at the end, but before
- 3:25we get there, let's introduce yourself.
- 3:28Tell everybody, what did I not include?
- 3:30What would you like everybody to know about you?
- 3:32Chellie Carlson: I, well, I'm thank you for that beautiful intro.
- 3:36It's received.
- 3:37It's an honor to have this membership and to hear reflected
- 3:42back to me is really special.
- 3:44So a little bit about me.
- 3:46So I live in Los Angeles, but I grew up.
- 3:49It's lots of duality here.
- 3:51I grew up on a farm in Missouri got a fashion degree
- 3:55from Central Missouri State.
- 3:58So, again, it doesn't matter where you go to school or what degree you get.
- 4:02So I got that degree and then I lived in Chicago 21 years.
- 4:05And then I've been in LA about a year and a half now,
- 4:08Nicole Laino: and are you loving LA?
- 4:09Chellie Carlson: I'm loving it.
- 4:10I'm never leaving this weather.
- 4:13I get to work outside every day.
- 4:15I have open, you know, I, it's.
- 4:18It's home, but I love to travel back to Chicago because I miss it a lot.
- 4:23I mean, I don't really miss the weather, but I miss the
- 4:25people and clients and friends.
- 4:28But yeah, that's my journey.
- 4:29And I worked a little, my background, I worked for a lingerie brand for 20 years.
- 4:34This You know, connecting the dots backwards, this work prepared me to
- 4:40ultimately understand women's bodies and minds and ultimately help them,
- 4:47you know, unlock, their inner beauty and know that their bodies are perfect
- 4:53as they are, no matter their size.
- 4:55So I would see women that had full large busts.
- 4:59Who wanted smaller to look smaller.
- 5:01And then all of my small busted women wanted to look larger.
- 5:05So there was so much confusion around, you know, basically no matter what
- 5:10size you were, you didn't feel like you were enough or it was right for you.
- 5:14Right.
- 5:15And so I would notice this and putting them in the right bra that made them feel
- 5:19really confident and comfortable in their body and made their clothes look really
- 5:23well, um, you know, these women would.
- 5:26Cry in the fitting rooms with me and they would hug me and say, Shelly,
- 5:29what you just did for my bras.
- 5:30I need you to do for my whole wardrobe.
- 5:32So that's when I started side hustling.
- 5:35I built a website in 2019 and then I started handing out business
- 5:41cards and building my business.
- 5:44From the ground up.
- 5:45Nicole Laino: And you did that, you're, you're not 22 years old, so I think
- 5:48Chellie Carlson: I did.
- 5:49Nicole Laino: And I, I mean,
- 5:50I found
- 5:51Chellie Carlson: it at 40.
- 5:52So this is another part of my story that ladies, I found it at 40 in 2020.
- 5:58So I found it 2 weeks before COVID hit.
- 6:01We had mutual termination with my company.
- 6:03I still love the brand and work with it.
- 6:06And I said, you know, I'm ready to go on my own.
- 6:09I'd been playing small long enough.
- 6:12I was so uncomfortable playing small.
- 6:14I'm like, I'm going to launch my brand, my business.
- 6:16Let's go.
- 6:17And then boom, COVID hit.
- 6:20So it was actually, and I was on, honestly, I was on unemployment
- 6:24for about a year and a half.
- 6:26Which was, you know, thank God I got that unemployment because, you
- 6:31know, I couldn't, you know, the stores were closed, things were
- 6:35happening that were out of my control.
- 6:38So I focused inward and I, I knew that this would pass and that
- 6:44looking back again, connecting the dots, it was a huge gift for my
- 6:48industry and then having women not.
- 6:51Leaving the house or wearing sweats for a couple of years, and then
- 6:54they're realizing, wait, I deserve more for my wardrobe, right?
- 6:59And we had the whole awakening and I deserve more from
- 7:03everything in my life, right?
- 7:04After being locked up for a year and a half.
- 7:06And so I hired a coach that created my three step methodology
- 7:09that I still use today.
- 7:11I launched that in 2021 and then right at that point it took off from there.
- 7:18Every year it just kept growing and growing as I kept growing and growing.
- 7:23Nicole Laino: And there's, there's a few things in there.
- 7:26I want to go into, I want to ask you first about the lingerie company.
- 7:31You brought up big busted women wanted to be smaller, smaller busted
- 7:34women, women wanted to be bigger.
- 7:36Um, , that was a huge, I mentioned this in the intro, but that
- 7:39was a huge conditioning point.
- 7:41I'm going to call it small T trauma that I grew up being called.
- 7:47My nickname was top heavy.
- 7:50Chellie Carlson: Wow.
- 7:50Nicole Laino: I was, and it was so, it was not a, it was not a compliment.
- 7:57Um, I always felt like I looked fat because everything, I did
- 8:02not have things that fit me.
- 8:03I did not have a bra that fit me.
- 8:05That was the
- 8:06Chellie Carlson: supportive.
- 8:07Mm hmm.
- 8:08Nicole Laino: That was like mind blowing to me.
- 8:10The first time I went for a bra fitting at a bra place, where a woman walked in
- 8:15to the dressing room with me, and was like, here, I want you to put these on.
- 8:19And they were different sizes than I had ever worn, and I wasn't spilling
- 8:23over the sides, I wasn't like up to my chin with my cleavage, they just fit.
- 8:30And I cried.
- 8:32I cried.
- 8:32Chellie Carlson: This, It feel there's so much shame society puts, as women
- 8:40were supposed to look sexy and show off our breasts, but then there's so much
- 8:44judgment and shame if you actually do it.
- 8:47And then I understand what you've I mean, so many women would come in the
- 8:52fitting rooms with me and they would cry.
- 8:55They would feel just like you the trauma from that.
- 8:59There's so much that was.
- 9:01held around the bras and it's so sad and then they would instantly become
- 9:07safe with me and I would say, you know, I'm going to get you in the right bra.
- 9:10It's going to change your posture, your energy, your confidence, and
- 9:15they would walk out of there looking 10 years younger and 10 pounds
- 9:18slimmer and feeling different.
- 9:21And then I've now get to do this with the whole wardrobe and it's life changing.
- 9:27Nicole Laino: Well, it's, It's one of those things to where, you
- 9:30know, you go from feeling like if I, you know, sometimes I think back
- 9:33to 10 years ago and I bought fancy clothes when I worked on Wall Street.
- 9:38I guess we're going back even further than that.
- 9:40I've been out of there a little bit longer.
- 9:41When I worked in corporate, it was very much suits and stuff like that.
- 9:45So, And I felt comfortable in a suit because I felt like I looked professional.
- 9:49I felt like I fit the role that I was playing there.
- 9:51It wasn't me.
- 9:53It was.
- 9:54Corporate Nicole looked like that and then when I left corporate, I had a
- 9:58closet full of Corporate Nicole clothes and I no longer was that person and
- 10:03then I had sort of like a style identity crisis for a moment where it was like, I
- 10:06don't really know how to, how to dress.
- 10:10Yeah, where do I, where do I start?
- 10:13And, and that's where your membership really changed everything for me.
- 10:17Before that, I had some pieces that I liked, but overall, just back to that
- 10:21bra thing about that trauma, cause it doesn't have to be your boobs.
- 10:24It could be another part of your body.
- 10:26My sister, it's her butt.
- 10:27She's just like my butt.
- 10:28Everything is just, her mind goes directly to it, which causes
- 10:33so many people to stay stuck.
- 10:35in a box.
- 10:37Chellie Carlson: Yes.
- 10:37Nicole Laino: the same thing that maybe doesn't work And
- 10:39Chellie Carlson: just hiding, potentially hiding it a lot of women,
- 10:42it's arms or legs and my job, you know, it's about how to balance.
- 10:48And once you have a beautiful look, that feels great on you,
- 10:51nobody's looking at your arms.
- 10:54Nobody's looking or focused on your, but if you feel really powerful and
- 10:59great in your body, they're looking at how your energy, they feel you
- 11:04and they, they treat you differently.
- 11:07And so it's wearing things that balance you and make you feel really good.
- 11:12Um, But so many and giving permission, you know, a lot of
- 11:16women I meet just won't wear shorts.
- 11:18And my last client, she said in her home, she's like, I won't wear shorts.
- 11:22Shelly, she lives in Scottsdale.
- 11:24And so I looked at her and I said, okay, Claudia.
- 11:27And I understood the fourth, look, I put her in the studio or shorts and
- 11:33she instantly had this, like my whole team when, when I said it's time for
- 11:37shorts, she literally physically had a reaction and was physically not well.
- 11:43We put her in these shorts.
- 11:46She she's now obsessed with the shorts.
- 11:48She took a selfie, sent it to her husband and she's like, I look great in shorts.
- 11:53And like, yes, you do.
- 11:55You don't.
- 11:56She hadn't worn them since childhood.
- 11:57They're like, you have beautiful legs.
- 11:59Why are you hiding them?
- 12:01And it was her.
- 12:02She'd been conditioned to believe her legs weren't good enough from childhood.
- 12:06So it's, it's setting us free from all of these limiting beliefs that
- 12:13Nicole Laino: when I think about body image and when I think about, this is
- 12:16a show that's dedicated to becoming the most authentic version of yourself,
- 12:19the, the, the highest, most authentic version of yourself through human design.
- 12:25And I wanted to have you on here because style is an expression
- 12:28of your authentic self.
- 12:30And when we are hiding, when we are in our trauma and not in our power
- 12:35with the way that we feel in our clothes, then you are not in your
- 12:40power, you are not being authentic, you are in the process of hiding.
- 12:45And so many people, so many entrepreneurs, we have to be out in front.
- 12:50We
- 12:50Chellie Carlson: have to be visible.
- 12:51Yep.
- 12:51Nicole Laino: visible when you're selling it's your energy, when you
- 12:54are marketing, it's your energy.
- 12:57And if you don't feel comfortable in your own skin, people, people, pick up on that.
- 13:02Chellie Carlson: sense it.
- 13:02Yep.
- 13:04Nicole Laino: And they might sense that something's off with you, but they're
- 13:06not thinking, I bet she just has, you know, she thinks she has a big butt
- 13:10and she's not comfortable in her pants.
- 13:12They're thinking like, I don't know, there's just something
- 13:13off about this person.
- 13:14I'm just not feeling the power I need to feel from somebody I need
- 13:19to trust before I invest with them.
- 13:22Chellie Carlson: It's so, so powerful.
- 13:26Oh,
- 13:27Nicole Laino: And so it's really about, it's more than clothes.
- 13:31It's not clothes
- 13:31Chellie Carlson: way more, way more than clothes.
- 13:33I wish.
- 13:34And again, I'm not the one who makes the rules with clothes.
- 13:37I wish, we weren't judged for anything we're wearing, but it's
- 13:40less about what you're wearing.
- 13:42And it's more about how it makes you feel.
- 13:45That's the power of it.
- 13:47And it's finding the things that make you feel your best and then wearing
- 13:51them over and over and over again.
- 13:53Nicole Laino: And loving your body through this process of,
- 13:56like, your client loves her legs
- 13:58again, and I'm sure she's enjoying her life more in Scottsdale with
- 14:02shorts on.
- 14:04I live in Austin, this, I live in Austin.
- 14:07Um, I had to come to terms with
- 14:10shorts and skirts.
- 14:12I never thought I was a girly girl, so I never wore skirts.
- 14:16And now I found dresses and skirts and things because you know what?
- 14:21Its hot, And I love them.
- 14:22When I found ones that fit my personality, fit, cause some of them don't
- 14:27Chellie Carlson: feels like me
- 14:28Lifestyle?
- 14:28Yep.
- 14:29Nicole Laino: they're in, but I'm like, this just doesn't feel like me.
- 14:32So bye, I don't need to fit somebody else's trend
- 14:37Chellie Carlson: Trend?
- 14:38No.
- 14:38Nicole Laino: And so I want to talk about signature style, because I
- 14:43know, and, and your method, because you have a three step method.
- 14:49And your method, it's not just about buying all of these other pieces.
- 14:53And I wanted to ask you, you said somebody helped you put together that framework.
- 14:57Does it help you in being able to explain what you do and how you help people to
- 15:02have a clear framework for how you do it?
- 15:05It's not just Oh, I shop for you,
- 15:06Chellie Carlson: Right.
- 15:07There's
- 15:08Nicole Laino: might be like, okay.
- 15:09Chellie Carlson: yeah, there is.
- 15:10It is changed the game for me of having, you know, people like the,
- 15:16you know, the container is very clear.
- 15:19These are the steps.
- 15:20This is all I do.
- 15:21You can't reach out and hire me for a one off or a photo shoot.
- 15:26This is my magic.
- 15:27And I do these all these 3 steps.
- 15:29And so it really, I think, is powerful.
- 15:32It gives people like, okay, this is they want methodology when hiring people.
- 15:38Like, , It's it shows that in the process works, the transformation
- 15:43happens only after these 3 steps.
- 15:46And it's proven.
- 15:48Nicole Laino: Well, you're telling them how you get results and for all the
- 15:51entrepreneurs listening, if you don't have a framework and you can't clearly
- 15:55explain to people how you get them from point A to point B, then that's
- 16:00probably why you are Not able to sell as regularly as you would like to.
- 16:05So tell everybody, first of all, what's a signature style
- 16:09and why does it matter?
- 16:11Chellie Carlson: Yeah.
- 16:12So a signature style is ultimately, the way you show up consistently
- 16:19creates your signature style.
- 16:21So it could be, you know, for everybody, it's different.
- 16:25Um, I can use myself, for example, so a signature style for me is my jewelry,
- 16:30which I'm actually not wearing because I have a bow, but I wear the same necklace
- 16:36Nicole Laino: everyday.
- 16:37Your stack.
- 16:37Chellie Carlson: my stack and it is my signature part of
- 16:42my signature style because I.
- 16:44Literally, no matter what I'm wearing, except the bow, I wear this signature
- 16:49stack and it shows that I'm consistent.
- 16:52People are watching me and it ultimately, when you show up consistently,
- 16:57you're building trust with your audience and it is so powerful.
- 17:01Another signature style aspect of my style is leopard.
- 17:06So I leopard is my neutral.
- 17:09I love leopard.
- 17:10I've loved it since I was a child.
- 17:13Having it be in style right now, I'm, I'm stocking up on all the leopard.
- 17:17Yeah, I'm really happy.
- 17:19So leopard, anything for me, a Papa leopard accessories,
- 17:23shoes, whatever it may be.
- 17:24So when people see that, they recognize me.
- 17:27They're like, that's Shelly.
- 17:29That's her vibe.
- 17:30Another thing for me is oftentimes there were sneakers or.
- 17:35Actually, another one is like boots and shorts is another look I love.
- 17:39So people recognize me for that.
- 17:41Um, , so it's finding whatever it may be for you, whether it's a certain shoe you
- 17:46want to wear over and over again, you know, it's finding what you love that
- 17:50people, people comment on it, or they're constantly complimenting you try just
- 17:55wearing that piece over and over again, and then style it in different ways.
- 17:59You're going to then start creating and honing in on your signature style.
- 18:06Nicole Laino: Yeah, for me, I'm definitely, well, , I'm
- 18:08wearing a blazer right
- 18:09now.
- 18:10I'm, I love a blazer.
- 18:12I am, I have, no one, no money will ever be wasted on me
- 18:16buying a blazer
- 18:17a
- 18:17Chellie Carlson: blazer
- 18:18Nicole Laino: It will get worn, it will get worn again, and again, and again.
- 18:21And I feel like me when I throw it on, they are my jackets here pretty
- 18:25much all year long in Austin whenever it gets, you know, when it's not
- 18:28summer, I have a blazer on cause I don't need a winter coat here.
- 18:33They are like the jacket.
- 18:34So, um, moto jacket.
- 18:36I like a third piece over, over my stuff and I love the graphic tee.
- 18:41I'm a rock and roll girl.
- 18:42I live in Austin.
- 18:43My
- 18:43husband's a
- 18:44Chellie Carlson: new vision
- 18:45with you.
- 18:45Nicole Laino: I was absolutely like.
- 18:47You know, I had a Penny Lane phase where I was like backstage at rock concerts
- 18:51all the time, and that's who I am.
- 18:52So when I put that on, I don't, there's not a part of me anymore that
- 18:57says oh, I'm not dressed up enough.
- 18:59I don't look professional.
- 19:01It's like, no, this is, This is, who I am.
- 19:05Chellie Carlson: yeah,
- 19:05Nicole Laino: my, This is my
- 19:06Chellie Carlson: thing
- 19:06This is my vibe.
- 19:07Um, I have some opinion on that.
- 19:09So then when you put this outfit on, you love it.
- 19:12The beauty is Nicole, you could wear it all day.
- 19:15You could then go to dinner.
- 19:17You could go to any, you know, , so many people are getting dressed
- 19:21for the occasion or for who they're going to be around or the location.
- 19:26My wish for all of us is to dress for ourselves.
- 19:29So when you wear that outfit, that blazer and graphic tee, you could literally go
- 19:34from your podcast out to a rock concert and you are appropriate no matter
- 19:40what, because you love your outfit.
- 19:43Nicole Laino: I get stopped all the time and people compliment me on my outfits
- 19:48and they're just my everyday thing.
- 19:49But I messaged you actually because I was at an event and I
- 19:52had to go to the airport directly.
- 19:54I had to leave early and get, go to the airport.
- 19:57So I wore my graphic tee.
- 19:59I wore, um, I wore my flate, my frame.
- 20:03Palazzo pants, which is like pajamas.
- 20:05They're so comfortable.
- 20:07My sneakers, like my, like Puma sneakers.
- 20:10And then I had, my oversized blazer on over knee over it.
- 20:14I had my, necklace, this one that I'm wearing right now.
- 20:17And.
- 20:18So everybody's in like these dresses and they're super dressed up at this event.
- 20:23And I walk in and I'm just like, and I didn't think twice about it.
- 20:26I was like, I feel good.
- 20:27I feel lovely.
- 20:28I'm totally cool here being in this.
- 20:30And I got stopped by no less than five people telling me
- 20:34how much they loved my outfit.
- 20:35I gave them all your Instagram, of course.
- 20:38And it's because I walked in owning it.
- 20:40I wasn't just like, Oh, I hope it's okay that I'm wearing this or I feel out of
- 20:44Chellie Carlson: so that's the power of a signature style and
- 20:48ultimately you're going to save money.
- 20:50Nicole Laino: Mm
- 20:51Chellie Carlson: Stop buying and over consuming.
- 20:55that is key.
- 20:56Just stop shopping where the few pieces that you love and
- 20:59wear them in different ways.
- 21:00And then that's your signature.
- 21:02Look, save you time and money.
- 21:05Nicole Laino: So there, there's two things I want to mention one other thing
- 21:07that I, most people who listen to the show know that I'm an, I was an actor
- 21:10when I was younger and I had this acting teacher, uh, well, I didn't have her,
- 21:14she was dead, but I went to her studio in New York and it was Uta Hagen and we had
- 21:18a whole, it was a conservatory program.
- 21:19So you were in it for a long time.
- 21:21You went through all of these different units and one of them was on costuming.
- 21:25And you spent a month where all you did was try on costumes, so you would do the
- 21:30same scene in four different costumes.
- 21:33And it was all to show you how the clothes changed the way you acted, who you were
- 21:40being when you walked in that room.
- 21:42So it was this, it was such a lesson for me, because she was like, do it
- 21:46in her book, she has a book, and you basically went through every chapter
- 21:49in the book and they were lessons that we did for like weeks in class.
- 21:53We did this for a month, where we just did things in different clothes.
- 21:58And, you know, we'd come in, in sweatpants and we'd do it.
- 22:01And then we'd come in, in a ball gown and we'd do it.
- 22:04And you brought in all these different things and different props and stuff
- 22:07that you would, if you put on beautiful jewelry, how did that make you feel?
- 22:10How
- 22:10Chellie Carlson: to change
- 22:12Nicole Laino: It changed everything.
- 22:15So.
- 22:15I know that's just a thing that has stuck in my mind when I see you and
- 22:19you're talking about Signature Style.
- 22:21I'm like, this changes your energy.
- 22:23It changes who you're being when you are around other people.
- 22:27And that's what people feel.
- 22:29No matter what you're saying, that's what they're getting from
- 22:32Chellie Carlson: you.
- 22:32Right.
- 22:33And another, another ping, it's, it ultimately, it's about self worth.
- 22:39Like, every time you get dressed.
- 22:41You're, you're saying like, this is what I'm worth.
- 22:45This is my value.
- 22:47I'm not the one who made these rules.
- 22:49It's just the way it is.
- 22:51And so every time, you know, I challenged my clients, like you're getting
- 22:54dressed, make sure this feels like this shows people like where telling
- 23:00them where I'm going, who I'm becoming.
- 23:03Nicole Laino: hmm.
- 23:04Chellie Carlson: And it's so powerful.
- 23:05And I think self worth is one of the biggest struggles.
- 23:08All my clients struggle with is, am I worthy of investing in these clothes?
- 23:14Do I deserve to feel this good?
- 23:19Nicole Laino: Well, it's
- 23:20Chellie Carlson: big
- 23:21Nicole Laino: The one question that I ask people, like I'm always asking
- 23:24myself, can this person see their value?
- 23:26So people come into my programs and through human design, I try
- 23:29to help you see what your innate value is and your method and your,
- 23:34your, um, your mode is clothing.
- 23:37It's through dressing yourself.
- 23:39It's through balancing your body because there are different ways.
- 23:43And what are some common mistakes that people are making that you
- 23:46see with the things that they maybe have always been wearing?
- 23:49Is there something
- 23:49Chellie Carlson: Always been wearing
- 23:50Nicole Laino: they should not have, they should stop doing right now?
- 23:55Chellie Carlson: the number one thing is hiding in your clothes.
- 23:58So when you have that body part, I had it.
- 24:01It was sort of my stomach area for many, most of my life.
- 24:03I would just hide loose kind of flowy and they were in style back
- 24:08then like these moves hiding that body part only does one thing.
- 24:13It draws more attention to it.
- 24:15So, ultimately, I see women just, oh, like, large fabrics, hiding, trying to
- 24:22just blend in with everybody else, so they don't get judged, rather than actually
- 24:27finding garments that fit their body, getting them tailored to fit their body.
- 24:33And ultimately, every look we need, we put on, it needs to come in at the waist.
- 24:39I don't care if you're a size 20, which I work with size 20s.
- 24:45I made my size 20 look like a size 10 because we balanced her so well.
- 24:51And no matter if you're a size zero, you still need to bring it in at the waist.
- 24:55It's the most universally flattering silhouette.
- 24:58Is the hourglass.
- 25:00So I don't care if you're an apple, a pear, whatever shape you are, we're
- 25:05trying to achieve the hourglass.
- 25:07And it's so simple.
- 25:08You bring it in at the waist.
- 25:10Even if we have, I know all a lot of women, we, we have that stomach trauma.
- 25:15So there's a little pooch there again, when you stand up tall and your outfit.
- 25:20Looks balanced.
- 25:21Nobody's looking at that.
- 25:23They're looking at how, strong and radiant you look in your whole outfit.
- 25:29So I say the number one thing is just snatch in that waist,
- 25:34matter what size you are.
- 25:36Don't be afraid to do it.
- 25:38You're going to look longer and leaner.
- 25:41Nicole Laino: And by doing that, it's, to me, one of the things I
- 25:44had a no crop top thing where it was just like, I can't wear cropped.
- 25:47So any, I'm always, I'm always, I'm always telling my people, , beware of
- 25:51anything that says I can't, I shouldn't.
- 25:54Um, because those, you should examine every single, , Inner sentence that you're
- 25:59saying to yourself saying I can't do that.
- 26:01I can't wear that.
- 26:02I can't be that Because I'll call bullshit pretty much on any of that.
- 26:07I choose to not wear that doesn't feel like me but that's a different that's
- 26:13a very different statement and I had a I can't wear crop tops and Then high
- 26:18waisted pants came in And then everything else that was longer than my waist just
- 26:27made me look out of shape and not right.
- 26:31So I had to, I had to fall in.
- 26:32Now they're all crap.
- 26:34Now I cut all of my t shirts.
- 26:35Like you teach us how to.
- 26:37Chellie Carlson: And it's just about the front tuck.
- 26:38If you get a little front tuck or full tuck, you look, you just look
- 26:43more and you're, and it's, you don't have to sacrifice comfort ladies.
- 26:49You just do a little front tuck, make sure your pants fit right and
- 26:53you just, it's all about tailoring
- 26:56Nicole Laino: So take everybody through those three steps.
- 26:59because it isn't just about shopping.
- 27:00So your method is, is, is made up of
- 27:04Chellie Carlson: start with your closet.
- 27:05Yeah.
- 27:05We start with your edit and this is a day with you really diving deep into.
- 27:13We're going to go to childhood.
- 27:15You learned how to get dressed from your mother.
- 27:18We're going to talk about.
- 27:19What she taught you about self worth where you can shop what you can and
- 27:24can't wear ex partners a lot of them Imprinted on you what's appropriate?
- 27:31You don't look goodness.
- 27:33You should wear this do this and then of course society the big one
- 27:38You know, your boobs are too big.
- 27:39You can't wear this.
- 27:41Your legs are not good enough.
- 27:42Don't wear this.
- 27:43So there's all of these.
- 27:44I'm able to in that closet when we're having we're trying on and
- 27:48editing through your wardrobe.
- 27:50All of those limiting beliefs are going to come up and I'm
- 27:53examining and noting each 1.
- 27:56So that when I shop for you, my job is to overcome those limiting
- 28:01beliefs and set you free just like I did with Claudia in the shorts.
- 28:05Claudia is never going to feel the same in her body again after working with me.
- 28:10She is like free.
- 28:12She's open and.
- 28:15She's magnetic.
- 28:16So this closet is closet therapy.
- 28:19So I'm all of your masks are coming off.
- 28:22You're sharing everything with me and we're editing.
- 28:25We're going to see all of the potential potential for choices.
- 28:29You may have made in the past.
- 28:31So whether it's.
- 28:33Buying low quality garments or it's buying the same category
- 28:37over and over and over again.
- 28:39Some women have 80 pairs of denim.
- 28:42You need maybe 4 pairs of denim.
- 28:45That's it.
- 28:46But we keep just thinking.
- 28:48Oh, I have the.
- 28:51I need more clothes.
- 28:51I just need to keep shopping and buying and buying.
- 28:54And so it's really about letting go of anything that's dated.
- 28:58So anything that's like the long blouses, skinny jeans, anything that's old.
- 29:04Just get it out of the closet.
- 29:07It's taking up space and your closet space energetically represents.
- 29:13What's going on in your life?
- 29:16It is a snapshot.
- 29:18So when you get clear and clean with your closet, lots of other things
- 29:22in your life are going to shift and you're going to get clean and clear.
- 29:26So it's, it's, um, it's a powerful session
- 29:31And just to kind of,
- 29:32Nicole Laino: uh, you know, highlight that one piece there
- 29:35where it's, you know, that your,
- 29:36your clothes and what's in your closet is, it's an, it's a physical representation
- 29:41of what you're holding onto and the things that you are still attached to, whether
- 29:45they believe so, if you have a shirt in your closet, a blouse in your closet, that
- 29:50reminds you of the time when you felt, heavy or it was about a bad breakup or
- 29:58maybe your ex wouldn't let you wear the top because you were showing Too much.
- 30:02whatever that is you're hanging on to that every time you touch it that brings back.
- 30:09Yeah, it's a memory it's a it's it's a trauma it's a Small t trauma, as I, as I
- 30:14Chellie Carlson: reffered to them
- 30:15Is.
- 30:15It is.
- 30:16Yes.
- 30:17Nicole Laino: why you want your trauma in your closet.
- 30:18Like we don't want that there because that's an intimate
- 30:22space that we go into every day.
- 30:24And since working with you through the membership, I have learned
- 30:28to love my closet so much more that when I walk in there, it's
- 30:31like, Oh, I have so many options
- 30:33Chellie Carlson: there's so much abundance, but you have fewer pieces
- 30:36Nicole Laino: I have fewer pieces I can actually move
- 30:39the hangers in my closet now.
- 30:41Chellie Carlson: should, You should be able to know where every garment is.
- 30:44Like If I think of a piece of my closet, I have a very small closet.
- 30:47I know exactly where that piece is hanging.
- 30:50Like I just know, because I, I don't have that much
- 30:55Nicole Laino: Well, and I also know when something's missing from my wardrobe.
- 30:58By not having so much, I could go, You know what I'm always
- 31:01reaching for and I don't have?
- 31:03It's this.
- 31:05I wish I had one more.
- 31:07Long skirt to wear with those amazing boots that I have because I want to
- 31:12wear those boots more and show them off.
- 31:14So what else do I need to kind of like, make me feel like I have,
- 31:18yeah, like where I have, you , Oh, this would be perfect with these
- 31:22three tops, like one other thing.
- 31:24Then it tells me what I need to invest in.
- 31:28rather than just be buying new things all the time.
- 31:31Chellie Carlson: another small T trauma that I find women are holding on to our
- 31:35clothes that they used to be able to wear.
- 31:39So we, we all struggle with this.
- 31:41So you have you're holding on to that.
- 31:44Beautiful trouser.
- 31:45That's two sizes smaller than you are right now.
- 31:48That skirt, those jeans, ladies, you can keep these pieces, but we do not
- 31:54keep them in our main closet zone.
- 31:58We are going to archive them.
- 32:00So this is your permission slip to take those pieces.
- 32:04Remove them from your closet, fold them up nicely and store
- 32:08them in another closet space.
- 32:11You do not need to be shopping them, reminding yourself that you
- 32:16no longer wear that size every day, reminding yourself that, you know,
- 32:22I'm gonna, it's just remove it.
- 32:25And if you do change sizes, you can revisit those and
- 32:29bring them back in when you do.
- 32:32Nicole Laino: yeah, so they're not part of your day to
- 32:33Chellie Carlson: day.
- 32:34Your not part of your day to day interaction and it's
- 32:36taking up that space again.
- 32:38We only, and back to like a seasonal closet too with my clients, we only have
- 32:43the current season front and center.
- 32:45So right now it's winter.
- 32:47There's no reason to have your white linen or flowy dresses like front and center.
- 32:55We need to move that to, the other side of the closet or hide it so that we can
- 33:01only focus on what we're wearing right now, which is fall, which is winter.
- 33:05Nicole Laino: It also feels like those clothes are new again
- 33:07when the next season comes,
- 33:08Chellie Carlson: When you re
- 33:09Nicole Laino: around.
- 33:10You do it with
- 33:10kids, right?
- 33:11You Take their toys away a little bit, you put them in a, and then you
- 33:13Chellie Carlson: And then
- 33:14Nicole Laino: again and they're like, oh wow, like I forgot I had this.
- 33:18Chellie Carlson: because there's, there's just, you'll edit again.
- 33:20So first thing you do next, you know, in the spring, summer, when we're pulling
- 33:23out those pieces, we're going to edit again and decide, okay, does this feel
- 33:28like me or it's time to let it go?
- 33:30So seasonal editing is huge.
- 33:34Nicole Laino: Okay so we've edited, now what,
- 33:36now to what do do?
- 33:38So now, Now that i've seen what holds the clients has
- 33:41Chellie Carlson: and I see their current wardrobe, my job is to fill in the gap.
- 33:45Typically, my clients are getting with the full transformation.
- 33:48They're getting a whole new small capsule.
- 33:51Okay.
- 33:52A lot of their clothes.
- 33:54Don't work for them.
- 33:55So we purged the majority.
- 33:56So what that means is I get to source this new wardrobe from any retailer, you
- 34:02know, the highest value in every category.
- 34:05Um, We ship it to the style studio and the client gets to show up for
- 34:10one of the best days of her life.
- 34:11This is her shop day
- 34:14where she, her pretty woman day, she walks in the entire space is
- 34:20Exactly what she's always dreamed of.
- 34:23This is we're styling her three to five years out.
- 34:25This is her next level self.
- 34:28She gets to look in the mirror.
- 34:30Majority of my clients look in the mirror.
- 34:33There's tears like, who is she?
- 34:37She's so beautiful.
- 34:39And.
- 34:40You're trying things you never thought you could wear busting all those limiting
- 34:47beliefs during the session setting you free so that you could every day getting
- 34:54dressed is the best part of your day.
- 34:57Nicole Laino: It's really fun when you love your stuff.
- 34:59Chellie Carlson: When you love and there's no reason why you shouldn't and
- 35:02you're, you know, no matter your size.
- 35:04I again worked with size 1820s this season.
- 35:09They cannot go to a store and buy clothes and so working with
- 35:14me, I handpicked and sourced.
- 35:16Everything that they literally the 1st, 1 of the clients, the 1st look she put on.
- 35:22She's like, if this is all I get, I'm happy.
- 35:25I can't believe everything fits me, you know, and it's like,
- 35:28we all no matter our size.
- 35:31We.
- 35:32We've been conditioned that it's not good enough.
- 35:34And so we, our bodies were just in constant battle with them.
- 35:39And I know because I've done it my whole life.
- 35:42And so I'm here to help, you know, now that I'm in my mid forties, it's getting
- 35:47better, but I'm really here to just help women know that our bodies are perfect.
- 35:53The clothes are typically the problem.
- 35:56So let's get clothes on you that feel really good.
- 35:59And you're going to feel lighter and majority of my clients after working
- 36:02with me, just start losing weight because they now understand how to
- 36:07dress their body and they feel better.
- 36:09So they make better choices throughout the day.
- 36:12Nicole Laino: Have you ever met a woman that you've worked with that
- 36:16didn't have some sort of body, issue
- 36:19Chellie Carlson: no,
- 36:20Nicole Laino: ever?
- 36:21Chellie Carlson: not one.
- 36:23Nicole Laino: I can't think of a person, a woman I've ever met, that didn't have
- 36:27Chellie Carlson: something
- 36:27zeros.
- 36:28Yeah.
- 36:28So my, my zeros have it just as much as my 18 to 20s, maybe even more.
- 36:35My zeros have it more just that harsher, more critical view.
- 36:43Of perfection
- 36:45Nicole Laino: Mm hmm.
- 36:46And
- 36:46Chellie Carlson: and it's holding us back.
- 36:48Nicole Laino: It's, that's not your most magnetic self.
- 36:52When you're in your shadows of anything, whether you're shaming yourself or you're
- 36:57trying to attain unattainable perfection.
- 37:02It's not the vibe.
- 37:03Um, , so, what's the
- 37:05Chellie Carlson: 3rd step
- 37:06Oh, next.
- 37:06Oh, then the next step is yours.
- 37:08So at the end of that, the top seamstress from LA comes in and tailors
- 37:14everything because fit is everything.
- 37:17So I make sure I've been sewing since I was 15.
- 37:19So I make sure fit every garment is perfect or retailer.
- 37:23That's my favorite part.
- 37:25Then we freight all of these clothes to the home of the client.
- 37:28And then the last session is.
- 37:30Basically their style session, so they've worn some pieces for a few weeks.
- 37:35I want to know what do you have questions on?
- 37:37What are we struggling with?
- 37:39How can I, you know, what do we need to work on here?
- 37:43And then I deliver a digital lookbook.
- 37:45So this is their current wardrobe styled with their new pieces.
- 37:49So they have, you know, , Cher's closet at their fingertips,
- 37:54all their looks on their phone.
- 37:57Nicole Laino: That's amazing
- 37:58Chellie Carlson: So they can get ready in five minutes.
- 38:01Nicole Laino: I have some core visualizations that I do moments that
- 38:05I have for myself of what I'm calling in for myself for like the next year, I
- 38:10will share this with you publicly, that, um, one visualization, because I like
- 38:15moments, I like like actual moments, not just like, oh, I'm manifesting this money.
- 38:20It's like, what's a moment with something that represents me having it.
- 38:23And for me, it's you and your team.
- 38:27I'm welcoming you into my home.
- 38:30And my dogs are jumping on you and it's a whole moment and I cry
- 38:34when I do it because I'm like, because, you're so real to me.
- 38:37So it, it, it adds to that visualization, but I have this
- 38:41moment where I feel like I'm there.
- 38:43And because I think most women, I think all people want this, but I think
- 38:49women, especially because I think we tend to feel like we haven't been seen.
- 38:54Um, , we're dying for somebody to see us for who we are.
- 39:00And what a gift that you do that for people.
- 39:06Now, if it's okay with you, can I talk about your human design just a little
- 39:09bit
- 39:09Chellie Carlson: course, I would love
- 39:11Nicole Laino: So,
- 39:12Chellie Carlson: to dive into that a
- 39:13Nicole Laino: so human design obviously tells us, so you're
- 39:15an emotional generator.
- 39:17So you have emotions and, and, you.
- 39:19know, Usually emotional people, like it's wisdom over time.
- 39:24Like as things sit with us and we marinate on them, like we
- 39:27just sort of deepen with things.
- 39:29Generator, you know, you've done different things in your life, but
- 39:32there is a pretty strong through line.
- 39:34I went to fashion school, I got my degree.
- 39:37I worked for a lingerie company, which is not what you do now, but
- 39:40it was the catalyst for something.
- 39:42And you kind of moved in, in an upward straight line, right?
- 39:46like a stair step straight line.
- 39:48And that's very much.
- 39:50Generators also, they're builders, like I build things and usually
- 39:53they're at their best when they're building something they love.
- 39:56But what I really want to talk about are two aspects of your chart.
- 39:59Um, Well, three, you being a two, four profile, the two is called the hermit.
- 40:05Um, Really what it's about is, usually twos love their alone time,
- 40:10but the four is inherently social.
- 40:13So you have this push pull of like, leave me alone, but I love people.
- 40:19I thrive with people.
- 40:21Um, And you know, the fact that a lot of your growth has come through masterminds
- 40:24and through networking and through just the people that you know, um, really
- 40:29speaks to that four line connection opportunity comes through people and
- 40:33it's through the people that you know, and the people who know those people.
- 40:36And then the two though is just I'm just a natural at things.
- 40:39There's just something that I'm good at, whether I've been schooled
- 40:42at it or not doesn't matter.
- 40:44I just have this natural talent.
- 40:46And then the rest of the chart starts to clue us into what those talents can be.
- 40:49Now, one of them you have, the channel of something called the Perfected Form,
- 40:53and the channel of Perfected Form is about aesthetics, usually people who
- 40:58have this channel, there's just this draw to outer beauty, the things that,
- 41:03you know, things that just Visually are appealing aesthetics or say Anna Wintour.
- 41:09This is her only channel.
- 41:10She has just this one.
- 41:11Um, And it's just about impeccable taste and a way to, to really see the beauty
- 41:16in things and how things go together.
- 41:18So you have that talent and then you have this, this design of talent being
- 41:22a two line where there's just like your thing is just going to be your thing.
- 41:26And you won't be able to, you don't necessarily have to explain it.
- 41:28It's just like, I'm just, this is just what I'm born
- 41:31to
- 41:31Chellie Carlson: is what it
- 41:36Nicole Laino: When 2's are doing what there born to do life supports
- 41:36them in really amazing ways.
- 41:37Now, being a vessel of love, the vessel of love, there's
- 41:41only, it is a very unique cross.
- 41:43This is, and our incarnation cross is like our purpose in life.
- 41:47And the, there's a lead gate to everyone's purpose.
- 41:50And yours is gate 10, which I wanna, I want to call out a couple of things.
- 41:54Cause it's, it's sort of freaky.
- 41:56Gate 10 is the gate of authentic self.
- 41:58Behavior of the authentic self.
- 42:00So when you are being authentic then you become an example for others
- 42:07to be their most authentic self to behave where nobody cares, you
- 42:11don't care what anybody else thinks.
- 42:13And the moment that you become self conscious, that's when things don't work.
- 42:18And by you being in your power in that gate, you, therefore,
- 42:22that's how this energy works.
- 42:24It's not a, I teach you how to do this, it's literally by you being in that
- 42:28energy, you provide that energy for others and you become the example of
- 42:32what could be for them by being that.
- 42:36That's literally what your brand is.
- 42:37When we do branding by human design, that would be like the, the north
- 42:42star of your brand is authenticity.
- 42:44and loving yourself.
- 42:48But then we go over to the other side to your unconscious
- 42:50sun, which is the 46th gate.
- 42:53And the 46th gate is the gate of the love of the body.
- 42:56And so it's these two that the outer light and the inner light for you are love of
- 43:02your authentic self and just behaving as yourself and being who you're meant to be.
- 43:06And then the 46 gate love of the body to just say, I love this human form.
- 43:13I love this human experience, what a gift it is to be alive, and what
- 43:19a gift it is to be in this skin suit that we are walking around in, in
- 43:23this body, and how can we love it?
- 43:26And the 46s tend to, you know, There's a, my body is a temple kind of thing can
- 43:31definitely be a consistent theme where we, when a 46 takes care of their body,
- 43:37it doesn't mean being perfect, but where you feel like you're nourishing your body,
- 43:41that is also contagious to other people.
- 43:44And that's something that's more something you share versus necessarily being
- 43:48an example of, although you can be.
- 43:50Um, But these aspects to me just popped out where.
- 43:55Because ultimately a vessel of love, you're here to be an expression of love
- 43:59in all of its forms and it's going to be what You love comes through you.
- 44:05And usually when you said that, you know, women would come to you when you worked
- 44:10in the lingerie company and they would immediately feel comfortable with you.
- 44:15That's what vessel of love people do.
- 44:17It's you just have a feel good energy that people feel good around you.
- 44:22And.
- 44:23So these are just, there's so much more obviously in the chart, but those were
- 44:27things that when I see people who are living so in alignment with what they were
- 44:33designed to do, I wanna give that example too to everybody listening, because when
- 44:38you step into your gifts, They become more than just your gifts, they're, then you.
- 44:43start to be a living, breathing example of them, And.
- 44:47it goes beyond you, and I think that's what you're doing.
- 44:50You affect so many people with the love of what you do, whether it's your
- 44:54Instagram, which everybody should be following her on Instagram, she's at
- 44:58Shelly Carlson On on I. G. We will link that up in the show notes for you.
- 45:03Of course, and you should join the membership because the membership
- 45:06is so ridiculously affordable.
- 45:08It is so amazing and it is the great, the best first step into your world.
- 45:14If you can't make the big jump to the full shop and the full method.
- 45:18It is so Jam packed with value and education on how you can
- 45:23live as your highest self.
- 45:24So I, through your style.
- 45:26So I just wanted to share that with you and with everybody here.
- 45:30and I want to thank you for being here and for sharing your
- 45:32wisdom and your gifts here.
- 45:34Chellie Carlson: Thank you for having me.
- 45:36It was beautiful.
- 45:37I could talk to you all day
- 45:39Nicole Laino: same.
- 45:40Is there anything that you wanted to say to the listeners
- 45:42before we, before we wrap up?
- 45:44Chellie Carlson: no.
- 45:44Just, yeah, come follow me on the IG.
- 45:46Let's hang out.
- 45:48Nicole Laino: She has such great content.
- 45:49She, she puts up such great content.
- 45:52Um, So please follow her again.
- 45:53She's at Shelly Carlson.
- 45:55You can find her on IG and send her a DM.
- 45:58Share this episode on your stories and tag both of us.
- 46:02I'm at Nicole Laino, official tag us and let us know what you thought about it.
- 46:05Show us your signature style, Shelley.
- 46:07Thank you for being here.
- 46:08I appreciate you.
- 46:09Thank you.
- 46:09listener for making it to the end of the episode with us.
- 46:12Remember in order to have an unshakable business, you must
- 46:14first become an unshakable human.
- 46:16So thanks for letting us help you become unshakable with human design.
- 46:19Everybody.
- 46:19We'll see you next time.
- 46:21If you love this episode and you're a fan of the show, please show
- 46:23us the love on iTunes, Spotify, or wherever you're listening to
- 46:26the show and leave us a review.
- 46:27And if you'd like to connect with other entrepreneurs on their human
- 46:30design journey, join our free Facebook community, Human Design for Entrepreneurs.
- 46:35Go to nicolelaino.
- 46:36me forward slash podcast links to join the group, book a human
- 46:40design reading with me, or access our free human design resources.
- 46:44We'll see you there.