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Age is Just a Number When you Skydive at 83 · The Happiness in Retirement® Hour

• # Swell AI Transcript: Bill Del-Sette x Christa - Audio Only.m4a SPEAKER_00: The information provided is for educational and informational purposes only, and does not constitute investment advice, and it should not be relied on as such. It should not be considered a solicitation to buy or an offer to sell a security. It does not take into consideration any investor's particular investment objectives, strategies, tax status, or investment horizon. You should consult your attorney or tax advisor before acting on any information. No investment strategy or risk management technique can guarantee returns or eliminate risk in any market environment. All investments include a risk of loss that clients should be prepared to bear. The principal risks of the Del Ceti Capital Management Strategies are disclosed in the publicly available form ADV Part 2a. Del Ceti Capital Management, doing business as the Happiness and Retirement Group, is a registered investment advisor. Advisory services are only offered to clients or prospective clients where Del Ceti Capital and its representatives are properly licensed or exempt from licensure. Hello, and welcome to the Happiness in Retirement podcast. What if I told you that one of the secrets to a great retirement might be refusing to act your age? My guest today is Krista, and she is fiercely independent, incredibly active, and she still goes skydiving. That's right. While some people in their 80s are slowing down, Krista is jumping out of airplanes. But what makes her story so interesting isn't just the skydiving. It's her attitude toward life, aging and independence and happiness. So today we're going to talk about what it really means to live a full life. Why age really doesn't matter necessarily and give you the limitations and what all of us can learn. from someone who continues to embrace adventure well into her 80s. Krista, welcome to the Happiness in Retirement podcast. SPEAKER_01: Thank you and good morning. SPEAKER_00: Yes, good morning. And so my very first question is, I have to ask, what makes you look at an airplane and think, I should jump out of that? SPEAKER_01: Well, it's been on my bucket list for many, many years and the opportunity just never was there until this summer when we were on our family summer beach week. And two of my grandchildren came in the living room and said, good morning, but we're out of here. We're going skydiving. I said, wait a minute, hold on. I'm going with you. It was just so spur of the moment. And I've always remembered how the senior Bush president jumped at 80 and he did a tandem. He did a tandem. Um, but he had been, he had been skydiving in the military, you know, single. So I thought, yeah, let's try this. And it was so wonderful. I loved it every minute of it. SPEAKER_00: Amazing. And what was going through your mind when you jumped out? SPEAKER_01: just excitement, just, you know, oh, what's coming up next? What's happening? And they had given us some instructions when the person I was closely attached to said, okay, I'm gonna put this one leg out here and you follow with both of yours. And so, you know, both of my legs were already out on the side and he was in total charge. And then he just pushed us both out. And we had 30 seconds of free fall. That was great. That was really, really something. And then the, And then we had four to five minutes of floating. And he even gave me the controls of it. So I could turn us to the right and to the left and a little down and a little up. SPEAKER_00: It was great. It was just fun. Did you have any fear at all? Because I have to tell you, skydiving has been on my bucket list for years. And, uh, in Mexico, where I spend some time, they're skydiving right on the beach close to my, my condo. And I see these people doing it and I just think, man, I want to do that. But you know, it, I think it takes some real, I don't know, bravery. SPEAKER_01: No, no, you know, it, it takes trust. You have to trust the person that you hooked up to. Okay. And I had asked him, how many does he do per day? And he said on a good day, 15 to 17 all summer long. Wow. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: So I thought every day all summer long. SPEAKER_01: Yes. He knows what he's doing, you know? Yeah. And it was his business. He and his wife ran this little little plane. It was a little plane. Oh, my goodness. Tiny, tiny plane. There was just enough room in there for my my granddaughter and the person she was tied to. myself and the pilot. You couldn't have put a newspaper anywhere else in between. That's how small the plane is. And the plane went up 4,000 feet. But I think we were jumping at 3,000. Yeah, it was good. SPEAKER_00: Still amazing. Amazing. And so go ahead. SPEAKER_01: And Bill, I don't have any fear. I've just never had any fear about anything. Even after something happened, like I had a really, I was into horses at some point and had a really bad accident, but I couldn't get fast enough back up on the horse. SPEAKER_00: Amazing, amazing. So, okay, on that note then, Krista, knowing that, do you think taking risks and trying new things helps keep us young? SPEAKER_01: Well, it definitely keeps me young because it keeps other things coming up that, oh, yeah, I want to do that. Or, yeah, I want to do that. So, you know, I have to stay young for that. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. SPEAKER_01: I have to be able to get up in the morning and say, what is going on today? What am I going to do? How wonderful is this day going to be? And I have to be optimistic about life. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. SPEAKER_01: Every day. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. Optimism. Optimism is so important, isn't it? SPEAKER_01: Yes, yeah. But you know, the most important part of getting old, and I live alone, I have a big circle of friends, really, really good friends. You know, I was saying earlier that this past weekend, yes, on Friday night, I gave dinner, gave a dinner party for 10 in my house. Saturday morning, we went We went to visit some other friends. A friend of mine from the city was visiting for the weekend with me, and I have a roommate right now, a temporary roommate with a little dog, as you know, little LB. SPEAKER_00: Sure. Yeah, little LB. You want to tell the audience what LB stands for? SPEAKER_01: It stands for little... SPEAKER_00: You know, I just, I have to steal that name, the next dog. SPEAKER_01: I know, I know, I know. SPEAKER_00: She's quite old. SPEAKER_01: She's 14 years old and almost blind and almost deaf. So, you know, but she's so cute. She's so cute. And I miss having a dog. As you know, I lost my dog in May. Really, really miss her. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'm so sorry about that. You do. You really do. Do you think dogs keep us young? SPEAKER_01: Oh, I think so. I think so. You know, it gives me a responsibility. I need a responsibility. I don't have any right now, right? But I like having a responsibility. And like with this little one, you know, my roommate stays upstairs in the guest room, but the little one is downstairs with me. She's in the kitchen. I leave my bedroom door open. She comes and wakes me up when she has to go out. SPEAKER_00: Wow. Amazing. And I don't mind getting up. And it's purpose. SPEAKER_01: There's a purpose. SPEAKER_00: It's a purpose, right? Yeah. Yeah. And dogs, they just are so carefree. And I don't know about you, but you know, when you're around a dog and they're, they're so in the moment, living in the moment. SPEAKER_01: Yeah. SPEAKER_00: And yet as humans, our minds are always just going right. Somewhere else. SPEAKER_01: Exactly. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: So it keeps us in the moment. SPEAKER_01: My friends called my previous dog, My Shadow, because she didn't leave my side. So I miss My Shadow. She was 14. For a mid-sized dog, she was a hunting dog, mid-sized. That's a good age. It's a good ripe old age. SPEAKER_00: It sure is. Yeah, it's for years. So I was very much involved in dog rescue. And at one point, I had eight rescue dogs that lived lived with us. Yeah, it was for Jack Russell's two chocolate Labradors and two Cairn Terriers. And the smallest dog in the pack was the pack leader. And her name was Nessie named after Loch Ness Monster. Also very appropriate for her. But the chocolate labs, imagine two 80 pound chocolate labs wrestling in the living room and Nessie would run up and jump up and couldn't even reach their chin and bark. SPEAKER_01: They understood they had to stop. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, they would go flat. They would literally go flat on the ground and wait for Nessie to take a few steps away. Oh, that's great. And then they start all over again. Yeah, that's fun. SPEAKER_01: Well, this little dog is a current, this little dog is a current terrier also. Very small current terrier. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: And very smart. SPEAKER_01: She's cute. Yeah, she's cute. She's really cute. SPEAKER_00: That's her own way. Oh, I can imagine, right? Well, L.B. is probably an appropriate name, right? I think it is for her. So have you always been physically active or is it something you developed later in life? SPEAKER_01: Well, I've been working all my life, you know, I never stopped working. So yeah, you know, and then I had my younger years of going out dancing and stuff like that. So yeah, I was active. And I've always loved to go hiking. And I live in the mountains now. And as long as I had my dog, I would go on good hikes with her. I don't feel so safe going hiking by myself. With the dog I felt, you know, and with the dog, people are very friendly when you're with the dog, when you have a dog. We stop and we talk and, you know, dog people anyway will stop and talk. So that makes a big difference in hiking. SPEAKER_00: And dogs know who the dog people are. SPEAKER_01: Yes, they do. They do. Yeah. So now I go for long walks. There's a park nearby that has about a one mile circular walk with stations for exercise. And I do that. But I'd like to go hiking again. I like to go in the woods, you know? Yeah, when I get another dog in the spring, I'll go hiking again. SPEAKER_00: So you think you definitely will get another dog? SPEAKER_01: Oh, absolutely. Yeah, I can't live without a dog. The only reason why I don't have a dog yet, and all my dogs are rescued, is that I have some trips planned, you know, and I'd like to have several months here at home with a dog before I take before I say, Look, I'm going away, you go here, just to get the dog really comfortable and feeling secure. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah. And so one of the things we talked about frequently on this podcast is that retirement isn't simply about having enough money. It's about having something meaningful to do with your life. So what gives you a reason to get out of bed in the morning? SPEAKER_01: Oh my goodness, all kinds of things. I was just thinking also that I have to practice the piano because I'm taking piano lessons. It's another one of those things keeping me busy, you know. But, you know, I'm healthy. I want to get out of bed. And I don't want to get out of bed thinking, oh, what am I going to do today? No, I want to get out of bed saying, oh, it's great weather. It's beautiful outside. So what am I going to do? Lots of things to do. And sometimes I just go for a long drive in the mountains. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. You live close to the Smoky Mountains. Is that right? SPEAKER_01: No, no. I live in the foothill of the Blue Ridge Mountains. Skyline Drive is a 10-minute drive, not even 10 minutes to get up on Skyline Drive for me. But the West Virginia mountains are maybe a half an hour, 45-minute drive. And I'm in the tall mountains in West Virginia, in Appalachia. I love it. SPEAKER_00: Amazing. SPEAKER_01: Love going on these small, small country roads. I've had an experience on one of those small country roads, too. It showed on the map that there was a way to go over this mountain. So I thought, well, I'm going to go over this mountain. It was a thin line. And as I'm on top of the mountain, as I'm getting up there, I'm realizing there's no way to turn around. It's so narrow and steep. I have to keep going. And then as I'm going down on the other side, there are a couple of creeks I have to pass. You know, I'm in a Honda Accord, and I don't really know how deep these creeks are. This was in November. Well, at one point, I had to get out and get a stick and really feel how deep is this. Can I, you know, can I get through here? And I did manage to get through. Drove down the other side, and there was a hunting cabin, and men were sitting out around a bonfire. And I stopped and, you know, and said, Can you tell me if I get to number so-and-so down this road down here?" And they looked at me and they said, honey, how'd you get here? I said, well, that's my car. That's how I got here. They said, across the mountain and through these creeks? Yeah, that's how I got here. They just laughed and they said, well, you have to cross one more Creek and they call it Creek, right? Not Creek. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. Correct. Correct. Correct. Of course. SPEAKER_01: It's the Creek. But, but you should be okay doing that. SPEAKER_00: And I was, you know, I made it through and you made it and it's, you know, so piano lessons, let me ask you another question. Do you think it's important to have goals regardless of age? SPEAKER_01: Do you have what, have rules? SPEAKER_00: Goals. SPEAKER_01: Oh, goals. Oh, yes. Yes. I think so. Absolutely. And I, you know, I just wanted to be able, I told my teacher when I first met with her, I said, I want to be able to play small classical pieces. and I'm now playing a Chopin in wet, and I'm playing something, playing a small Beethoven piece. I love it. I get so much fun out of it. I'm very much a beginner. You know, these are the easiest of easy pieces, but it's fun. I mean, it's so rewarding to do that. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and it is. And, you know, continuous learning and always getting a little better, I think, keeps us young. I know certainly for me, as I start to get a little older, I never want to lose that curiosity. I never want to lose that idea that I can learn something new and get good at it like you or even just go skydiving or learning to play a musical instrument or recording this podcast. Yes. SPEAKER_01: You really enjoy technology. I know you do. And now you have the studio. That's wonderful. That's great. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. And so what are you still looking forward to accomplishing? What is still on your bucket list? SPEAKER_01: Well, traveling is always number one on my bucket list. I've been thinking for a couple of years that I would like to go to Vietnam. I would like to see Vietnam. But the long flight, I mean, that's 24 hours on an airplane. That is just very discouraging for me. I do still go to Germany to visit my sister and family members. And that's an overnight, an eight hour overnight flight. And that's kind of grueling. It's a long flight. It's a long flight. But for that, I fly business. But I really, flying business to Vietnam is a little bit too much for me on my budget. It's a little too much of a drain on my budget. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I can imagine that's not cheap. SPEAKER_01: Well, there's an organization I go with that's really, really, really great, wonderful. Everything is organized. It's called OAT, Overseas Adventure Travel. SPEAKER_00: Okay, I noted. Overseas Adventure Travel, OAT. Yes. Okay. SPEAKER_01: They have, I think there's a 20-day Vietnam trip for like 4,500, including the flight. SPEAKER_00: Wow. Very good price. SPEAKER_01: Yeah. Yeah. I have to think about that. Yeah. Costa Rica is also on my list. SPEAKER_00: Costa Rica, me too. Never been. I hear about it all the time. SPEAKER_01: Yeah. SPEAKER_00: Never been to Costa Rica now. SPEAKER_01: And that's close, you know, that's not a long flight. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's not a long flight. And so what role does curiosity play in your life? SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, if I were not curious, wouldn't be any reason to get up. SPEAKER_00: There wouldn't be any reason to be active. Yeah. That's true. SPEAKER_01: So the other thing that I'm really into music, I've always loved music, but especially classical music. And, um, there's been a group that I followed into four of their concerts. One time I even flew to Brazil for one of their concerts. And they're called Il Volo. There are three Italian guys. Well, they've been surpassed now. I have a new boyfriend. His name is Dimash Kudaibergen, and he's from Kazakhstan. SPEAKER_00: Oh my goodness. SPEAKER_01: Dimash is his first name. Kudaibergen is his last name. SPEAKER_00: Dimash Kudaibergen. SPEAKER_01: Yes. SPEAKER_00: Dimash Kudaibergen. Wow, that's a mouthful. So how did you find Dimash, the music of Dimash? SPEAKER_01: Well, friends of mine, you know, they know how much I'm interested in music. And Dimash was singing with two of the big tenors, Plácido Domingo and José Carreras. And so they sent me this video and I thought, who in the world is this tall young guy there with an unbelievable voice? And singing with these two top tenors in the world, you know, they've invited him to sing with them. So he's important. And see, the reason why he's become, he's world famous, just not so much in the US. He sings in six octaves. I mean, if you know anything about music, his low voice is absolutely gorgeous, beautiful. But when he goes up as high as he can, nobody believes it's a man singing. It's a soprano who can get that high up. SPEAKER_00: Amazing. SPEAKER_01: And it's anything in between. It's not just classical music. SPEAKER_00: Your curiosity obviously has led you to find new music, listen to new music, learn how to play the piano. So curiosity then clearly is very important to keeping you young. SPEAKER_01: It is. It is, because it's keeping your mind young and normal, you know. I don't think of myself as old. I mean, I sometimes look in the mirror and I'm thinking, who is this? This is not me. SPEAKER_00: You know, that's I read that in a book somewhere. I can't remember who the author was. But he was talking about how, you know, how you just feel young. And then you look in the mirror one day, as I do now as I'm getting a little older is like, Hey, is that really me? You know, it's like, not in a bad way. But But you don't you don't feel your age? Do you? I mean, does that make sense? SPEAKER_01: No, no, I don't. You know, I do in a way, you know, I get reminded that I don't have the energy I used to have, obviously not. You know, I get tired and sometimes I really like my afternoon nap too. SPEAKER_00: Sure, ditto. SPEAKER_01: Yeah, my mind is still with the younger folks. It really is. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and learning must be such an important part of that. Now, here's another thing, right? So the research shows that having relationships in retirement is one of the most important things. So how do you continue meeting new people and maintaining relationships? SPEAKER_01: I'm just, I've always been a people person. You know, I was in sales, and you have to like people to be in sales. Very much so. All my life. I talk to strangers. I talk to anybody. I want to get to know people. And you know, I'm always friendly with people. I was at a gas station the other day and this older couple in front of me and they were looking like, and I just said, good morning. Isn't that a great day? Well, they were both happy that I did that. And we started talking. Of course. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: But you know, having friends, SPEAKER_01: Having friends and having close friends, it is the most important part of getting older. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. Yeah. And so getting back to those little interactions, again, more and more research. I'm a bit of a nerd when it comes to this stuff because of what I do for a living. I became very interested in what makes for a happy, meaningful retirement. And again, the research says very clearly that those little interactions when you go to the store, when you go to the post office, when you get gas, when you're at a restaurant and you take the initiative to say hello, you realize that we're all just kind of the same, but people kind of, they crave that, but people are afraid to to be vulnerable and say hello, but the research is clear that those little interactions, as crazy as it sounds, are so important to maintaining happiness and being healthy. at any age, but especially in retirement. But the problem is we live in an era now where we have social media and people don't leave the house as much. And, you know, people are divided and all this other stuff. But you take the initiative to reach out to people. SPEAKER_01: Right. And I have a few friends who also take the initiative. You know, they don't leave me here by myself. I get phone calls. Let's do this. Come join us with this or that. That's important. Those connections, keep those alive. Yeah. Yeah. They enrich your life. So what advice? SPEAKER_00: Yeah. And what advice would you give someone who's retired and is struggling to find social connections? SPEAKER_01: Well, it's very hard to give advice because, you know, it's a very personal thing to reach out to those connections. I met somebody the other day, there was a demonstration, political, and of course I was part of it. And somebody introduced me to this woman who said she's new in the community, she's single, divorced, not too long ago, and really needs company. Well, I've made myself cards, you know, business business cards, whatever you call them. And I gave her my card and I said, call me, call me. You know, there are lots of single women in this town here. We do things together. And I'm starting a new book club, too. That's the other thing I've done. I've gotten too much into television. SPEAKER_00: I like that you're self self-aware enough to know that. SPEAKER_01: Yes. And and they've all been Korean TV shows with subtitles. But it's gotten to be too much, so I decided I have to get back to reading, and I used to be a habit reader. And we had a cocktail party, we had a little party, and lots of my friends were there, and I said, okay, who wants to be in a book club? So we're eight, eight women. No, and two men, yeah. SPEAKER_00: Okay, so there are a couple of guys in the book club, too. SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and we're starting in a couple of weeks. You know, the first meeting, I sent out a memo and said, let's all agree on a time and date. And we did. It was, you know, back and forth. We found one date and time a week that was convenient to everybody. And then I said, for the first meeting, I will host. And then we take turns hosting. And for the first meeting, bring a book. Bring something that you would recommend for the group to read and discuss. So that's how we got started. SPEAKER_00: And what are you bringing? What book are you bringing? SPEAKER_01: I don't know yet. I have to look in my Kindle. I have so many books on my Kindle that I haven't read. SPEAKER_00: You know, when I was a kid, this is, I think, you know, the reason why I have been, you know, I've done okay in life. The primary reason is that when I was young, My mom read voraciously, but she took us kids to the library every week, and I would come home with eight books, and I would read maybe one. Oh, really, I had all the I had all the books and by the time it was time to bring them back, I had only finished one or two. But, but it's so like reading is so important. And yes, it transports you to a place. Yes, you know, somewhere else. And it gives you different perspective. And, and so book club, what a you know, what a great idea. The thing is, so SPEAKER_01: and i like reading on your kindle you do well i have it on my kindle and of course i have it on my ipad and my my laptop the kindle app is everywhere so i can pick it up anywhere i want i want to be um i like good literature good entertaining literature and i I think back of when I was in my teens, like 16, 15, 16, 17. I read all the Russians. I even read War and Peace. Couldn't tell you anything about it, but I read it. The Brothers Karamasoff. My favorite, which I've reread, was Anna Karenina, and I've read that twice, and saw the movie a couple of times, too. Yeah, her story is very moving. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, there was, I can't remember the comedian who said he took a speed reading course, and he said the first book he read afterward was War and Peace, and he said it was about Russia, you know, or something. That's all he could remember. Anyway, that's right. Let me ask you, has your perspective on life's problems changed over the years? SPEAKER_01: Not really, not really. But what has changed for me at this age is that I'm not getting too upset about it anymore because I can't do anything about it other than vote. And that I do, you know, that I do religiously. And yes, when there's a demonstration, yes, I might walk also. But other than that, it's going to be up to the younger generation. to change this world. SPEAKER_00: It's true. SPEAKER_01: I can't change this world anymore. I can't even change anybody in my family or my friends. That's another thing I've come to. You really have to accept people for who they are and how they are. SPEAKER_00: And change comes from the inside out. SPEAKER_01: Yes. I can only change myself, not anybody else. Right. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. And so you, you clearly have been so resilient throughout your life. What have life's challenges taught you? And, you know, this resilience, you know, what is, what have, what have these challenges taught you about life? SPEAKER_01: You know, it's very hard to say because that's just my personality. that the challenge comes along and I don't think of, oh my God, no. I think of how am I going to conquer that? How am I going to go on from that? You know, it's always positive thinking. I love to live. I love life. I'm not going to let any challenge crush me down. But you have to have that attitude. You can't sit on the pity pot about anything. SPEAKER_00: Boy, that's great perspective right there. Just keep going no matter what. SPEAKER_01: Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. And one of the things that I find fascinating about aging is that as we get older, it seems that our priorities often change. I know mine certainly have changed. What things used to seem important to you that no longer matter very much? SPEAKER_01: What used to be important to me was, what do other people think? Am I dressing correctly for this situation or that? Am I behaving correctly in this environment? That environment? I don't think that anymore, you know? I've accepted myself for who I am and yeah, make little changes. Yeah, I'm aware of some things that I maybe should do a little bit different, but I don't shoot other people and I shouldn't shoot myself either. SPEAKER_00: I love that. I'm gonna, I'm gonna put that in my repertory. Okay. Don't shoot other people. Stop shooting all over yourself. That's right. Stop shooting all over yourself. You know, that's great. And it's, I find myself, you know, and so authenticity, it seems that Being authentic as we get older, again, and I think clearly what you're saying is, you know, it resonates with me because as I'm getting older, you know, it's not that I'm inauthentic, right? But when you're younger, you do care more about what other people think. You may not express yourself. You may not dress the way you want. You may drop less F-bombs. You know what I mean? SPEAKER_01: Well, actually, I drive F-bombs easier now in my old age. SPEAKER_00: That's what I mean. It's like you become more authentic. And, you know, another comedian was he was talking about being in line at a grocery store and someone said something that he thought was really silly. And he started to say something and he said to himself, I don't know if I should say that that's probably not appropriate. But then he said, screw it, I'm gonna anyway, you know, like, in it, but in a sense that that authenticity where you don't really care as much as you said, what other people think you care more about, about, you know, being happy and being at peace and being yourself, correct. SPEAKER_01: And I feel that I have developed into a person who is accepted by other people the way I am. I don't have to make up anything. I don't have to be somebody else to please other people. No. You're right. Authenticity. That's it. SPEAKER_00: So there was, early on in my career, way very early on one of my first clients was a psychologist and I am a financial planner for those of you that don't know and he would he dressed in a literally like a cowboy he had the vest the leather vest the boots everything And we're in upstate New York, first of all. And I didn't say anything about it until I got to know him a little better. And one day as we were having a review meeting, I said, you know, I said, do any of your patients, are they offended or anything by what you wear? Because you dress like this all the time. And he said, Bill, he said, I found out early in life that half of the people are going to love you no matter what you do. And half of the people aren't going to like you no matter what you do. So you might as well do the things that make you happy. SPEAKER_01: That is wonderful. SPEAKER_00: That is a really great story. SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I have to remember that one. It's so true. It's so true. SPEAKER_00: You can't please everyone, so you might as well please yourself and be yourself. And what do you appreciate more today than you did 20 or 30 years ago? SPEAKER_01: Well, I certainly appreciate having the time to myself. Being able to get up in the morning and, you know, not having to rush someplace and do some things and just relax, you know, take life as it comes. Have some pleasant, some good plans. I always fly out for, well, at my youngest son's house, we always have, he does a big Thanksgiving. We have 20 people easily. Friends invited also. And then for Christmas, I go out to California where my older son lives. And this year I'm going to spend a few weeks into January there. I like to be in warm weather in January, but things have kind of changed with where I used to go. Wow, okay. but you know, I'm on the go. SPEAKER_00: Well, you said, okay, so that's a perfect segue because, um, we have, when, when we retire, we have different phases. And one of the phases is what we call the go-go years. And the go-go years are when you have three things, you have your health, you have time and you have some money. And when you have those three things, then you have time affluence, you could do what you want, you have the money to do those things, but you also have the health, and you're a go-go, you seem to still keep going, right? I mean, they haven't ended for you because you're still doing all these things. SPEAKER_01: My go-go years really started when I turned 77. That's when I sold my business, my house, moved into town, into a smaller house. And yeah, these are my go-go years. Absolutely. SPEAKER_00: That is great. That is great. They started it at 77 and it looks like they're going to go many more years from here. And SPEAKER_01: I believe so. And I'm always telling my doctor that, you know, I really want to get to be 90. He laughs and he says, Krista, you're going to be 100. Don't worry. SPEAKER_00: Has your definition of happiness changed as you've gotten older? Oh, yes. SPEAKER_01: Yeah. And I can afford a lot of happiness more than I could afford when I was younger. You know, like flying to a concert that I want to hear. SPEAKER_00: Sure. Just to be able to do it. SPEAKER_01: Do things, yes. Yeah. And my family. I mean, I have four sons, all married. Each has two children. And I love the get-together. I really, really appreciate everybody getting together. And they're looking out for me. SPEAKER_00: That is wonderful. SPEAKER_01: Oh my goodness, they're so concerned. So if I need anything, you know, they'll be there for me. SPEAKER_00: Oh, you're so lucky that way. So many people don't have that. So many people don't. I spend my professional life helping people prepare financially for retirement, but I always tell people that money is simply a tool to help us live the lives we want. Now, I'm going to preface this question with a quote, and the quote is, people who say that money isn't important will lie about other things too. Absolutely. You're right. You're right. How important do you think money is to happiness? SPEAKER_01: It is. It is. You know, the fact that I can go on these trips I want to go to. Uh, the fact that I, you know, I don't have to, I've been buying some art too. I love certain, mostly abstract. And I have these kinds of, I mean, this is giving me real enjoyment. Um, if I didn't have the money, I wouldn't have that, you know, good point. It's very important. It makes me happy. I'm looking at two paintings right now that, uh, I love those two paintings and yeah, it makes me happy just looking at them, but they were expensive. That's great. Yeah, it's okay. SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh. Yeah, you know, I managed freedom, I guess. It's freedom, isn't it? It is. But on a kind of a different note, do you think people sometimes spend too much time worrying about money and not enough time enjoying life? SPEAKER_01: Yes, well, and it's people who really they feel insecure no matter how much money they have I think you know There's some people who just even if they become quite wealthy will turn a dime over and over and over. SPEAKER_00: Yes Absolutely SPEAKER_01: You know, and you have to be. And that's why I'm so glad I'm talking to you. And I'm so glad that you're that you're running my finances, because, as I always tell you, I don't know anything about money other than spending it. And I love to spend it. But you have to keep track. SPEAKER_00: on how I'm well that's good you know it's wonderful because I have to tell you Krista and there's tons of research on this now that the average retiree spends nowhere near what they are capable of spending and you know so that that's a big issue that people don't enjoy life as much as they could because isn't that what's the that's what the money's for you save your whole life so that you can have the freedom to enjoy things whatever those things are travel or you know right learning piano and so what would you tell someone who has enough money to retire but is afraid to start enjoying their money SPEAKER_01: You know, I might, I mentioned how, how much I enjoy what I, what I can afford to do. Uh, but I can't, you can't tell somebody else how to change, you know, people have to become aware of their own need to change something. So yeah. Yeah. I know some people who just. do not enjoy spending their money, and they have a lot more than I do. SPEAKER_00: The old saying, have you ever seen a U-Haul being towed by a hearse? Yes. So you can't take it with you. Now you have to, of course, spend within reason, and that's why people work with folks like us, I think, for some guidance there. But looking back, okay, so here's, I think this is a great question. Looking back, are your happiest memories connected to things you purchased or experiences you had? SPEAKER_01: Experiences. Experiences. Yeah. Travel experiences are so much more important and so much more impressive than this art I have on the wall. Yeah, it's beautiful. I like to look at it. And some of it was expensive, some cheap, but that's very momentary. That's just, you know, right now I'm sitting here looking at it and it makes me feel good. It's a feel good kind of thing. But it's not an experience like traveling would be. Especially, you know, I love to go to foreign countries. I love to interact with other cultures, which is why I would like to go to Vietnam. I've been to India. I've been on a safari in Africa. And what I like about this organization that I mentioned that I like to travel with is the fact that every one of their trips, in every one of their trips, they involve you with the local society. So we always have a real experience of what the problems are, what the issues are in this society. And then we have, there's always a meal with some family. SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's great. You know, last year I was in... Are you familiar with Anthony Bourdain? SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, where he used to do that. He used to, you know, he'd eat with locals, he would talk about local issues on a show. And so tell us again, please the name of this company. SPEAKER_01: It's OAT. OAT. SPEAKER_00: OAT. SPEAKER_01: Yes. Overseas Adventure Travel. SPEAKER_00: Overseas Adventure Travel, folks. SPEAKER_01: They should pay me for this ad now, shouldn't they? SPEAKER_00: Yes, absolutely. What do you think the biggest misconception younger people have about getting older or being in your 80s, let's say? What do you think the biggest misconception is that younger people have about that? SPEAKER_01: Well, they don't think that I can do and I can think the way they do. They don't appreciate the learning that I've gone through all my life. And I know I didn't when I was younger. Older people are easy to ignore and neglect. SPEAKER_00: In today's society in the United States, yes, but in some parts of the world, they call people with experience the wise elders and they look up to them. And my experience, again, spending a lot of time in Mexico and being married to a Mexican woman is that they actually look up to people that are older and they look to them for wisdom And there's a respect and an appreciation that I think is being lost here in the United States sometimes, don't you? SPEAKER_01: I think it's lost in the Western society. I see that in Germany also. My sister doesn't have the circle that I have, and she's become very sedentary. She's three years older than I am, but it's Yeah, she's not involved the way I'm involved in, but you also, again, you also have to go after it. You know, I could be sitting by myself and not have the circle of friends that I have. You have to, you have to be proactive. SPEAKER_00: Oh, so important. Proactivity is so important in life and anything that is important in life. Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, a book by Stephen Covey, if you haven't read it. It's such an incredible book, but one of the seven habits is be proactive. And things that are, if you think about anything that is important in life, there are things that do not act on you. There are things that you have to take the initiative on. And so, you know, in the book, he has folks, he has the readers go through an exercise and he says, what's one thing in your personal life that if you know that if you did it and you did it consistently, would totally change your life? And then he says, now, whatever that thing is, Is that something that you have to take initiative for? And of course it is, right? That proactivity, like you said, is so important. And if it's to be, it's up to me kind of thing. So you've kept your circle of friends. You make plans to go on these trips. You formed a book club. You're learning piano. That's all proactive stuff. Things that you have to take the initiative. Wow, that's a really key insight. SPEAKER_01: And I love to garden. I love to garden and I haven't met a flower I didn't like, so. SPEAKER_00: Anything gets planted. There you go. What is something you know about life today that you wish you had understood at 50? God, that's a tough question. SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, one of the biggest things in life is that I've learned that I cannot change anybody else, but I can work on myself. Yeah. You know, back when in the earlier days when I tried to fit in somewhere, it just didn't work that well. And I didn't realize that it didn't work that well for me. It wasn't a way to go about living. I know that now, you know. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, when you're young, you think you could change people. SPEAKER_01: Yes, you can change people's attitudes. You can change people's behavior. No, you can't. You can't, you know. SPEAKER_00: We can only change ourselves. It takes a while to learn that. SPEAKER_01: It takes a while to learn that. It sure does. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. And what do you believe is the secret to living a happy, fulfilling life? SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, everything we've talked about already, being proactive, liking yourself. You have to really like yourself to, you know, be kind to yourself, take care of yourself. That makes for a good life. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, great advice. And so speaking of advice, how about some advice for new retirees? So imagine you're talking to someone who just turned 60 and is preparing to retire. What advice would you give them? SPEAKER_01: Get a good financial planner. SPEAKER_00: Hey, listen, I second that for sure. No, it is very important. SPEAKER_01: I mean, the fact that you're my financial planner and you're in control of what I have there makes me so comfortable, makes me absolutely comfortable. SPEAKER_00: Wonderful, I love it. SPEAKER_01: It's very important, yeah. SPEAKER_00: It is, it is. Money doesn't come with a set of instructions, does it? SPEAKER_01: Nor do children when they're born, right? SPEAKER_00: It's the same thing. Exactly. You know, I think children might be a little more, you know, of a challenge than than money. But for some people, it's not. It takes longer. Yeah. So what should folks start doing now that are on the cusp of retirement to make their later years more enjoyable? SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, think of your goals. What would you like to do when you're retired? And then, you know, think about, can you do that? You know, plan the things that you think you can do, you can afford, not these clouds up there that you can't get to. You know, stay positive about your goals and start them. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: Great advice. Great. And what's one, what's one thing everyone should try at least once in their lifetime? SPEAKER_01: Jump out of an airplane. SPEAKER_00: Bingo, got it. And hopefully I have your approval to use your video in this podcast. Oh yes. Is that okay? I think people would love to see that. Excellent. Okay. So we're getting close to the end. How about a little bit of a, what we call a lightning round? Okay. So I'm going to ask you a question and you answer it with whatever comes top of mind. Okay. SPEAKER_01: Yeah. Okay. SPEAKER_00: Okay. I feel most alive when, When I'm surrounded by positive. Wow. Love it. Love that answer. The best thing about getting older is. You can truly be yourself. Authenticity. There it is. SPEAKER_01: Yes. SPEAKER_00: One thing I never, never, one thing I never want to stop doing is. SPEAKER_01: Oh, being active, thinking of new things to do, you know, having new goals to go for. You don't have to become an expert. Like I'd say to my piano teacher. When she has some excuse for having to cancel the session, I say, look, I'm not practicing to become a performer. You know, I'm not practicing to perform with an orchestra on stage. Just doing it for my fun. So, okay, we'll do, we'll skip a week. SPEAKER_00: No problem. That's great advice. If you could give your 60 year old self one piece of advice, it would be. SPEAKER_01: Oh, those were tough years. Those were very tough years for me. There was a lot of stuff going on there. You know, my husband was sick and I had to take care of somebody else. I couldn't really think too much about what I wanted. Not at all, as a matter of, you know, when you're taking care of a sick person 24-7. SPEAKER_00: What advice would you give that person now when, you know, looking back, what advice would you give yourself back then when you were going through that? Knowing now what you know, what advice would you have given yourself? SPEAKER_01: Accept more help. Accept more help. SPEAKER_00: Wow. SPEAKER_01: Yeah. Don't think you can do it all yourself. Don't think that you have to do it all yourself. Look for help and accept it. SPEAKER_00: So important. Great, great answer. Okay. Life is too short to... Not to fully live it. SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's too short to be sad and to be depressed. And I do understand depression very well, especially seasonal depression. Yes, that happens to many of us. And go see your doctor and get some medication. You get through it, no problem. But overall, stay positive and go for life. Don't sit back and accept the downtimes. SPEAKER_00: Yeah, just you got to be proactive and authentic and all those things we just talked about. Yeah, great answer. One more question. You ready? Yes. Okay. You're still jumping out of airplanes. So when you turn 100, what do you hope you'll be doing? SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, it's funny. I picture myself at 100 not being able to get around all that much anymore, you know, physically. I want a great big party. Even if I'm sitting in a wheelchair, I want people to dance around me because I love to dance. And if I can't dance myself, let me see others dancing. Be surrounded by music and good friends. SPEAKER_00: What more could you ask for? SPEAKER_01: No more. No more. That's it. SPEAKER_00: Well, I, I do have an ask, though. Can we plan on having you back in the podcast when you turn 100? Oh, absolutely. SPEAKER_01: even at 90. I mean, my first goal is 90, you know, that's seven more years. And then after that, oh yeah, we can shoot for a hundred. Yeah. SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's great. And you know, I, Krista, really, I can't thank you enough for joining me today. I think your story is, it's such an important reminder that getting older doesn't have to mean slowing down, giving up independence or abandoning dreams. And We talk all the time about having enough money, it's not the finish line. The real goal is to create a life that makes you happy. And Krista, you're showing us what that can look like, jumping out of airplanes and learning piano. You're active, independent, curious, adventurous. SPEAKER_01: and most adventurous trips if you can. SPEAKER_00: Yeah. And you're still curious and excited about life. So I think there's a lesson in this for all of us. And maybe the secret to a happy retirement isn't necessarily how much money we have, even though that's important. We how much money we have doesn't matter as much as positive out continuing. Yeah, continuing to find reasons to be excited about tomorrow. And you're definitely doing that. So Krista, thank you so much for sharing your story with everyone. You're very welcome. Yeah, thank you. And to everyone watching and listening. SPEAKER_01: You know, I always enjoy talking with you. SPEAKER_00: Me as well. And that's why I invited you on the podcast. You're the first person I thought of. Folks, remember retirement planning should go beyond money. I'm Bill Del Setti, and I'll see you next time in the happiness and retirement podcast. Krista, thank you so much. SPEAKER_01: You're very welcome. Bye bye. SPEAKER_00: Bye bye.