Latest / DA CREW Podcast / SEASON 2 DA CREW PODCAST_EPISODE _35 HOST SHANETTE W JOHNSON

Transcript

SEASON 2 DA CREW PODCAST_EPISODE _35 HOST SHANETTE W JOHNSON · DA CREW Podcast

0:02
Persons. All things ain't what things used to. Where all the blue skys
0:14
but boys the blue from the north South thing wall persons, All things ain't
0:28
what they used to. Dallas, What worth A A L A C.
0:36
The Chance of your Dream book Tour in Expo is coming to your area.
0:41
Mark your calendars May eighteen, eleven am to three pm Central Standard time.
0:47
We have some amazing authors, some amazing business owners that's gonna be sharing about
0:53
their brand. We have some workshop facilitators that's gonna be coming out. They're
0:58
gonna be teaching on marketing and network I want you to plan to be in
1:04
the building, to be educated and power in in churage, come out support.
1:11
Aspiring Authors Magazine is a founding sponsor for doc cru podcast. Get featured
1:17
inside the magazine and allow your voice to be heard around the world. Aspiring
1:22
Authors Magazine is an international magazine founded in May of twenty twenty by Queen Angela.
1:26
Get featured at Wings of Transformation Publishing. We are committed to helping our
1:33
authors reach their goals and pursue their dreams of becoming published authors. We work
1:38
closely with each author to ensure a successful publishing experience, and we are dedicated
1:44
to helping them tell their stories in the most meaningful and impactful ways. We
1:49
look forward to putting you on the path to writing your book. Hello,
1:57
Hello, Hello, and welcome to the Crew podcast. I am the Visionary
2:05
Queen Angela and welcome to season two. I want to thank you for tuning
2:10
in and for all of your support throughout season one. We're back them Divas
2:19
of the Airways, So thank you for joining us tonight. Share this with
2:24
someone in your circle. Let's talk about it with your host at Johnson Join
2:31
me every first and third Monday of the month at eight km eastern standard and
2:42
let's talk about it for you. Good evening, and thank you for joining
3:21
me for another episode and let's talk about it. It just seemed like yesterday.
3:27
I just love you guys, but I want you guys to sit back
3:31
and relax and enjoy the show Tonight. Tonight I will be talking to Christopher
3:38
Taylor. He's thirty eight years old. He's currently incarcerated at the DRDC in
3:44
Denver, Colorado. He is serving a life without the possibility of parole.
3:52
Plus they added sixty four years onto his sentence. He's been his time served
4:01
up until now. Is eighteen years Christopher, Hey, good evening. How
4:11
you doing. I'm doing well in yourself. How are you? I'm extremely
4:16
honored and I'm thankful the supposed to be in the space with you told us,
4:20
Oh, I really appreciate you coming on and sharing your story with us
4:26
on this evening. Let's let's get into it. What I know that you're
4:33
art. You have a book change that incredible? That's on Amazon, so
4:46
right, Actually, I'm sorry it has changed the inevitable. Okay on Amazon,
4:54
Barnes and Noble and all major platforms. Definitely appreciate that you are welcome.
5:00
You are currently welcome. So you said that, I know we talked
5:05
a couple of times, and I know you were sentenced at the age of
5:13
twenty years old. Am I correct? Yeah? Now that's does that fall?
5:23
Would that be considered juvenile? Are an adult? How did they sentence
5:30
you? Well, I was sentenced as an adult scene that I was over
5:35
the age of eighteen. However, under the recent legislation, they extended the
5:41
age to twenty one, and I, you know, basically considered a young
5:45
adult. Here is that at that age, you know, decision making isn't
5:48
necessarily mature yet you know what I mean. I'm not even know that much
5:51
to buy alcohol at that time. But of course, in today's age and
5:59
in real life, you have to accountable for your actions. So pure I
6:01
sit incarcerated with the life sentence for for the actions good that I had at
6:08
the age of twenty. So would you like to give us a little detail
6:15
about you as a youth growing up? Are you a native of Colorado?
6:25
Oh? Yeah, I'm born and raised in different Colorado. Uh. I
6:29
lived a little bit with my mother in Texas. I did a couple of
6:31
school years then and there. My mother was actually an evagerous when I was
6:35
young, So I grew up in church heavily, heavily and donated in church
6:40
like church on Wednesday, church on Sunday, you know, and her being
6:45
an evangelist, I was able to travel with her a little bit, so
6:47
I was exposed to, you know, Catholic churches and set the day advantage.
6:53
Like, I've seen a lot of different religious backgrounds. I've seen a
6:57
lot of different sects within within christ humanity. So yeah, I moved around
7:02
a little bit, which was a blessing. But I was raised primarily with
7:04
my father right here in Denver, Colorado. Okay. So what was that
7:12
like growing up in Denver as a black youth, Well, it was it
7:17
was a trip because I'm from the Monbela area and we moved into park Hill
7:24
when I was five years old, and I had, like, you know,
7:29
up until the age of seven, I had an ideal life. I
7:30
had both of my parents in the house. And I mentioned my father defends
7:35
like my best friend and a father in my entire life. He's that person
7:41
for me. And so that's rare for African American males in this community out
7:46
here and across our country, you know, given our history, right,
7:49
but living in yeah, living in park Hill, it was highly in the
7:55
ninety ninety ninety three summer of violence, Like it was extremely dangerous. My
8:00
father did his best to keep me and my little sister away from gay violence,
8:05
and you know what it did and kind of arrest us a little sheltered
8:09
in NAIs so I became a late rumor by the time I did find my
8:13
way into the streets. However, Yeah, it was it was a trip
8:18
growing up here. You know, you don't think it's a lot of black
8:20
folks here, but in the black community, that's all I seen was black
8:24
and brown people. And you know, growing up in the struggle, you
8:28
had people that couldn't stand the violence and and you know, shamed it.
8:33
But then you had people who were just succumbed by it and grew up and
8:35
raised in the culture of violence. So it was it was a trip growing
8:39
up here. How was schooling? How you know, how did you perform
8:43
in school? You know, I was I was, I was a pretty
8:48
there. I was a smart student. I didn't always apply myself, you
8:52
know, I had a different way of learning. I made these ac sometimes
8:58
my favorite subject was was like I did everything with other science, but I
9:03
struggled with maths because like if I if I were missed a class or didn't
9:09
pay attention, and it's it's hard to keep up with maths. So that
9:13
was one of the things that I struggled with severely, if that makes sense.
9:18
But you know, being young, I used to love school. It
9:20
was you know, it was fun, it was social. It was the
9:22
only time I got to really hang out with other kids. However, by
9:28
the time I hit high school on the Montgello High School my freshman year in
9:31
ninety nine, I had I had been for the most part, sheltered like
9:35
it was hard to go hang out with friends and kind of do what other
9:37
kids could do. My father was real straight, you know, trying to
9:41
protect us or whatever. So I'll begin to skip school, right, Okay,
9:48
I'm sorry, Yeah, I just I just get a skip school a
9:52
lot in high school, which led me on the path to chasing money.
9:58
Growing up for you know what I me and seeing other kids that were all
10:01
hustling or have family that they had money. I didn't understand it. So
10:05
I learned how to get it, you know, and it just slowly but
10:09
surely led me down the path. But it was headed for you know,
10:13
incarceration, so you would So basically your story kind of sounds like some of
10:26
other people that grew up in areas back then, back in the nineties when
10:33
the drugs and stuff was into our neighborhoods and seeing other young people with money
10:43
and cars and everything else. So basically that kind of drove your got your
10:50
interest. Oh yeah, absolutely, I was. You know, we was,
10:54
we was poor. My dad was a disabled construction worker. Like we
10:58
grew struggling. You know, he was looking if you got to hand me
11:03
down ten speed from somebody else called Christmas time after my parents. So it
11:09
was it was really serious, right. So I remember one day my dad,
11:13
and you know, my dad is my hero man, and he did
11:15
the best that he could with his with his tools. But I remember one
11:18
day I was giving up going to school and he had gave me like three
11:22
dollars and he told me, he said, hey boy, look you got
11:24
some money in your pocket. I don't want to hear nothing about you had
11:28
to steal nothing. Just I don't want him to call me a dog.
11:33
Nobody's stealing nothing. I said, all right, pap, I went to
11:35
school. All story short. And my friend at the time I seen him
11:39
shooting dice at the Czetbo. You know, I'm skipping school, hanging out.
11:43
I see him shooting dice and count twenties and Didney you know here and
11:46
this other guy. They were shooting back and forth, and I hadn't seen
11:50
so much money. I think at one time he counted, you know,
11:52
close to one thousand dollars. And here we are, fourteen, fifteen years
11:56
old, and my dad just gave me three dollars and told me, don't
12:01
steal nothing. And I'm looking at my friend at the time counting all of
12:05
this money gambling and I just I couldn't wait till the Vice game was over
12:09
to say, hey, man, how did you do that? And he
12:11
was like what I said, I did get this money and he said,
12:13
man, I hit the block. I said, what does that mean?
12:16
He said, Man, I go to colfax myself. Dope. I said,
12:18
you gotta teach me how to figure this out. Right from that,
12:22
I just you know, I was a poor I was a terrible drug dealer
12:26
because I didn't know how to stay. So as soon as I got some
12:28
money, I bought some clothes, some liquor, spending my money some shoes,
12:33
you know, acting like somebody that ain't never had nothing, And I
12:35
said, enough money to go get some more dope. Like I was really
12:39
you know, young and misguided, but dreaming by others, you know,
12:45
what they had, and trying to figure out how to not necessarily sit in
12:48
but perha to find things like That's what really pulled me into the streets,
12:54
just like any other black men are Hispanic team when they see that, you
13:03
know that just that just draws them in because they see that their parents is
13:07
struggling, and you know, we're doing what we're supposed to do as parents.
13:13
But once you guys get out there, it's like wow, you know,
13:18
hey, you know because I had you know, my I have children
13:24
and they was sheltered. They stayed in you know, basically in the in
13:33
the yard. And once they got into high school. Once my son got
13:39
into high school, that's when I will say, like the what grade was
13:45
he in? Probably about the tenth eleventh grade. That's when he got buck
13:50
wild. But you know, I did kind of have like some kind of
13:56
control over him. He didn't go out there and like sell drug is there
14:00
anything like that? But he was he did. My son did give me
14:05
a round for my money. But back but back to you, when did
14:11
you, you have one left, decide that you wanted to join the games?
14:22
Well, it wasn't a decision. It was a decision, but it
14:26
wasn't a conscious like, yeah, you know what, I want to be
14:28
a game. Never. It was more or less like the guys that were
14:31
teaching me how to hustle, we were kids, and here we are selling
14:35
drugs to adults and all of the struggles that comes with people who are driven
14:41
by substance abuse, like all of the dangers that that present. Right and
14:45
then the right other people on the streets are other gang members, and so
14:48
I hit it vertically. Who was drug into it? Just by my association
14:54
and just by the loyalties that was developed by being faced with tough situations.
14:58
So I just matured into that and I had no uh, you know,
15:03
everybody was gaming, so I wasn't a bit more comforted to tell me right
15:07
it right, So, I mean it was just culturally accepted. So I
15:11
know, the phone getting ready to hang out, So I need you to
15:13
call me back. Why he's getting ready to call me back? I just
15:20
want to give you, guys a couple of statistics that I looked up on
15:28
today today, uh, with Denver, Denver is with their in Denver,
15:37
fifty seven of white defendants were were likely to have their sentence reduced compared to
15:43
forty eight black defendants and fifty and fifty two of expanded Sorry back that he's
15:56
calling me back. So I just wanted to give you so you can recorded
16:06
and maybe just the instructions to register this number as a private number to accept
16:14
charges and contesting. There start the conversation. Now, okay, Chris,
16:21
he yes, sorry about that. Oh that's okay. So we was talking
16:27
about you said that the guys drew you into the gangs are the life of
16:34
them? Uh you thinking that they was loyal the loyalty drew you into it.
16:45
It was you know, it was situation that oh see their their rivals
16:49
by friends, rivals, right, the guys that they were into it with.
16:53
I guess you would say they would approach me because I hung out with
16:56
them, and they would be like, hey, man, you from this
16:59
hood, and I'd be like, no, sid, I just hang out
17:02
with him, you know what I mean. And then one day a situation,
17:06
a road was will out, you know, hustling, and it just
17:10
turned into like, well this is this is my friends. I'm not saying
17:12
to run and what he is to it Like we've been out here dealing with,
17:17
you know, just the dangers of the streets when it comes to to
17:19
no disrespect, but to those things. Right, we're sitting down here with
17:23
grown those things, fighting and having each other's back and just trying to figure
17:29
out how to how to make money. And I'm not gonna run now like
17:33
they did him run. Well, I had situations and so from that it
17:37
became instead of y'all keep approaching me and be talking about no, I'm not
17:41
front and I'm like, yeah, this is who I am, bro,
17:42
this is what I'm with, Like it is what it is. And it
17:45
was like that slow progression. Like it wasn't like I just walked up to
17:51
these guys and said, hey man, let me be a part of your
17:52
you know. It was just that culture of growing up with people and this
17:57
is what we do, and so this is what we do, and this
18:00
is what we do. It was just that slow, you know, progression
18:03
of the culture that just consumes us. You know. So that's exactly what
18:07
happened. Did your did your dad notice the change in you? Did?
18:14
He say? Yeah, yeah he did? You know? And this is
18:21
this is I'm super ashamed to tell it, but the truth is the truth.
18:23
Like I deny averything, like I was the worst type of game members,
18:29
Like I lived a double life. Like literally, he'd be like,
18:32
boy, are you what you're doing this? And I'll come home. I'll
18:33
pull my pants up and try to square up and he'd be looking at me
18:37
like, what what's wrong with you? Nothing? That didn't certain because you
18:42
know what I mean, I don't want the problems. He's one of them.
18:45
Uh yeah, go side your heads, get out of mind. So
18:48
I got vice. But as soon as I would leave and say, hey,
18:51
Dan, can I go out and go to skate city or something like
18:53
that, and He'll be like, uh, yeah, I guess right,
18:57
you know, I'm fourteen fifteen, Yeah, I guess. So I'll go
19:00
and get around the corner and I'll pull a bend down out of my pocket
19:04
and tied around my neck, go to the park, you know what I
19:07
mean. Like, I was literally living a double life. And you know
19:11
it was. It wasn't until start catching them those cases. Or he'll start
19:15
coming by the school and he seeing hanging out and he was like, oh,
19:19
oh, you playing, you know what I mean. So then I
19:23
had to deal with that. Right, So how did your sister? How
19:29
was your sister doing when you were living in your couple life? Right?
19:37
So by the time, so like I'm back up just a little bit.
19:41
My parents put up when I was seven, and that was extremely hard for
19:44
us, like the whole all of us, right, And my own little
19:48
sister went with my mom. Truthfully, she was a bad too, you
19:51
know what I mean. She was not my father's child, and they had
19:53
a turbulent relationship. My little sister stayed with my dad, you know,
19:57
and that was just the way I was, just the way the cookie crumbled
20:00
when we were too young to understanding. We were bounced back and for Between
20:06
that, however, my dad gave us an ash like, hey, do
20:08
you want to go live with your mama? You want to try that out?
20:11
You can try that out. My little sister jumped at it, and
20:14
honestly I did too. That was eighth grade year. We went down there.
20:17
My little sister went there, and then we came back. I came
20:18
back my grade year, so she wasn't necessarily seeing the transformation. And to
20:26
segue just a little bit, my mom like my eighth grade year, we're
20:30
going to the Potter's house. My mom is an ordained minister on addition of
20:33
TDJ, So I'm down here, you know, I'm in church and you
20:37
know, working in the parking lot, doing all of this other stuff,
20:41
going to the Dew's house and all of this in one year. I come
20:44
back home and completely fall into the street culture. Like I had a taste
20:49
of freedom. I going to high school, get it and from there right
20:53
from there up ended up going back to Texas from my tent grad year,
21:00
and my mom was like, who are you? You know, yeah,
21:07
she was like what is I They they recognize my dresses different, my lingos
21:11
different, my whole persona, Like I'm different, but I'm still trying to
21:15
be cool because remember I didn't want to, you know, pass up to
21:18
it, trying to play cool, but they looking at me like who are
21:22
you? And from there, me and my mother's relationship became turgulate, you
21:26
know what I mean. Like so they didn't see it developed. They just
21:32
happened to see that change in a year of mind like wow, yeah,
21:38
so what is your relationship like with your siblings? Now? You know it's
21:48
it's it's a trip, it's a trip. I have a beautiful relationship with
21:51
my baby sister. Man, she's she's amazing right now. She's you know,
21:55
a champion. She's taking care of my dad while he's he's a comfort
21:59
care you know what I mean. She's doing the things that the baby young
22:04
girls should never have to do what she's doing it, so I celebrate her.
22:08
We have a beautiful relationship my older sister, like we have, we
22:11
talked, were good, We had a little sibling while when we was cool.
22:15
But I don't have closeness with any of my siblings like I have when
22:22
years without talking to people, you know what I mean, it's super sad.
22:26
But I mean my older sister and my little sister, of course,
22:29
like we communicate, we talk, and I'm not gonna like we go years
22:33
without talking, but I have other siblings that I haven't talking to her probably
22:37
twenty years, and there's just no desire for relationship and I've grown to accept
22:42
that. And so for my older sister, like we talk, but it's
22:47
not like a daily, weekly thing, right, you catch up with each
22:49
other, and that's just normal for us, you know what I mean.
22:53
I have my little sister a little bit more regularly, but even that is
22:57
not as closest you think siblings would be. So I just have We just
23:03
have a different family dynamic, and every family has their own, right,
23:08
it's not it's not really really close and all. So what about your mom?
23:15
Did my mom's You know, I love my mama and I can say
23:23
that my mom has always loved me. But again, we we we had
23:30
our issues and it was really you know, for me not understanding what the
23:34
voice was like in me, just listening to the to the narrative and choosing
23:40
a side, if that makes sense. So why my you know, my
23:45
not understanding why she wasn't there, and then just listening to what was going
23:48
on between my dad and my mom from a child's perspective. I chose my
23:52
dad's perspective. I accepted that as if it was true. And the truth
23:56
is I'm from who well when wor awhile like that's neighbor relationships. It took
24:00
me to a being about nineteen or twenty before I could accept the fact that
24:07
they don't stick to both of their stories. You know what I'm saying,
24:10
They gonna stick to that. And I just got to say, Okay,
24:12
I love y'all. Y'all love me. Y'all are showing me by accepting me
24:18
through all of my uh my messing up, my poor decision making and everything
24:22
that I'm doing wrong, y'all still love me, show up for me,
24:26
support me. So I can't be as bad as I proceeded to be.
24:30
So I had to really come to understand that. But today, while the
24:34
relationship with my man dad are beautiful, that's that's beautiful. So are you
24:41
do you want to get into talking about that that court decisions? Oh of
24:48
course, yeah, of course, So of course. Now let's let's walk
24:52
walk back just a little bit here. I am young and in game banging
25:00
for game ban and eager to if you who alsopposed to be living in the
25:03
altar he was coming up with a nickname and and all of this stuff.
25:07
Law story short, I went into a young man and I'm always saying his
25:11
name a little bit later before. For the sake of the story. Right
25:17
now, I'm gonna just tell you exactly. We had an altercation when I
25:22
was very young, and from that one altered creation grew a rival, right
25:27
like, he became the guy that I was always into it with. You
25:32
know. We had multiple situations leading up to this poor decision. And so
25:37
one day, one day I had just I actually had just got out of
25:44
prison. I was nineteen years old, John just turned twenty getting out of
25:48
prison, being twenty two months in the state of Oklahoma and driving through.
25:55
So I get out, I go home, and I'm out. I wasn't
25:59
out six week to the same guy that I had all these multiple altercations with
26:03
as a kid. He was a little older or whatever, but that don't
26:07
really mean nothing to young dougget, right, So we have we have words,
26:12
right, he ends up going to my uh my father's house where I
26:17
was staying, and he goes and he knocks on the door. He tells
26:19
my dad. You know, he was like, hey, man, where's
26:25
your son? And my dad is like, hey, whatever you got going
26:27
on, you can take that man somewhere. You know. He's telling them
26:30
like seriously. So dude was like, oh, okay, you this,
26:33
that and the other. You're a big man. I'll be back. The
26:36
lost story short. That night, my home gets shut up, right,
26:38
my dad, my stepmother, and my little sisters in the house. When
26:42
have happened? And so mind you, like nothing that's ever came to the
26:45
house. And you know they by now they know they know that I'm in
26:49
the streets. To a little bit. I went to president at a young
26:52
ass like, uh, they know that I'm in the streets if they're doing
26:56
their best to talk to me and try to keep me out of trouble.
26:59
And for the most part, I an my people's but I still just was
27:03
concerned with those young if he's so from that from that night he shot my
27:11
house up and I was actually up the street. I called home, but
27:15
I heard the gunshots and nobody answered. If I'm terrified, and I called
27:18
back and uh, you know, my dad picks up. He's out of
27:22
brass and he's I can hear my stepmother all frantic in the back, and
27:26
he's like, yeah, man, uh they just shot the house up.
27:30
And I'm like, if everybody's all right? He pauses, he said,
27:33
yeah, man, everybody's all right. But I got to call the police.
27:36
So I get up the phone and you know, I'm I'm you know,
27:40
super young, super emotional, angry, all like everything right, and
27:47
so you know, I call my homeboys. I'm like, man, come
27:49
get me, Man, come get me. And we ride around and we're
27:53
looking around like what's going on? What's going on? What's you know what
27:56
I mean, looking for guys and this, that and the other dot Nothing
27:59
happen to follow him in my house gets shot up again, right, and
28:03
so now it's like whoa by myself? Mom was standing at the scene.
28:07
A bullet goes through the front door and waz is by head. You know
28:11
that that's that story goes. I'm like, no, Lee, what is
28:15
like? This is serious? You know what I mean, carrying a whole
28:19
lot of anger about it. I'm hurt about it. You know, my
28:23
people be looking at me like you get out and you can do this.
28:26
And so I'm carrying a lot of guilt and shame about it, and so
28:30
my emotions is out of control. You know, I'm nineteen years old.
28:33
I'm just turning for like this is crazy. And a week a week goes
28:40
by and I end up going to the mall. Now, the guy that
28:45
I told you about that I seen h gambling when I was fourteen years old,
28:51
he ends up being one of my good friends to thigas Greg and so
28:55
we actually was out in the bell. We ended up going to the mall.
28:57
Went to the mall. Now, this the week after my home be
29:00
then shot up twice, like you know, we go to the mall,
29:03
right, you know, the neighborhood wood and gets and not even five seconds
29:08
after entering into the mall, just who I see. I see the young
29:12
man and that uh has shot my home up. And I'm instantly like,
29:17
oh man, this is out of control, you know. So he sees
29:21
me and his eyes blushed out. Man, he's smoking man on my eyes
29:23
and blush. You know, we're disrespecting one another, calling each other all
29:27
kinds of names, talking about the situation. You know, we we had
29:32
this this altercation mind you in the middle of the ball and kids. Girl
29:37
at the time, her name was Christal Martinez, and you know, I
29:41
grew up with her. I grew up. I knew him from, you
29:45
know, being a kid. We all in the same neighborhood. And so
29:47
she sees me, she stops, she gets in the new points. So
29:49
she's trying to break up this disagreement, right, and she's like, Chris,
29:55
he said, She said, Chris. She put her hand on my
29:56
chest. She put her hand on his chest, and she separated that us.
30:00
She said, listen, listen to me. Just go the other way,
30:03
Just walk away. I got don't worry about him, You're good.
30:08
Just leave. And so I'm looking at him like, you know, we
30:11
talk of stuff. He's looking at me like, yeah, what's up right,
30:15
And she's like, don't worry, just go, just go, please
30:18
leave. I turn, I walk like, I'll go upstairs. I'll go
30:22
to the other side. I'm headed out the same direction I came in.
30:26
I'm just upstairs now instead of downstairs. And you know, they they walk
30:30
down a different way before I get to the other side of the mall right,
30:33
he comes running out of nowhere and he's yelling, you know, what
30:38
I mean, and running up the stairways at me, and then I begin
30:41
to shoot right like, I lose all sense of decision making and control.
30:47
I just, you know, I'm consumed at that moment with all of the
30:52
emotions that have God brought us to that moment, and so I end up
30:56
shooting down a stairwell, a crowded still, I will remind you, in
31:00
the middle of a mall seven weeks of Utter being released from prison. As
31:07
a result of my actions, I accidentally shoot Crystal and she dies right there.
31:14
I accidentally shoot another innocent by standing. Her name is Miss Susan holy
31:17
Field. She thankfully survived, but she was shot twice. And I shoot
31:23
Kyle. His name is Kyle Boyd. I shoot him and he is shot
31:27
in the head. He at the time, and you know, was still
31:30
on the seat. So I'm you know, I'm like, I don't know
31:33
what's going on, Like I just shot down this mall. My mind is
31:37
out of control, like, oh man, I gotta go right, I
31:40
take off running and I'm apprehended. You know, I'm in the back of
31:45
the police car. People are driving. I'm looking and the police like,
31:48
yeah, some little girl got killed and I'm like a little girl got killed.
31:52
You know, my heart rousts to my stomach. I just can't believe
31:56
it. And you know, lo and behold. By the time I get
31:59
to your rocker host, did think by the time I see the news right
32:08
find out that Crystal was killed by my hands, by my actions. I
32:13
found out was shot. He was in the you know, in a cover.
32:15
And this other lady Mason, this holding field was shot twice. And
32:20
so here I am again, seven weeks out of out of prison, sitting
32:23
in a hold itself, watching the news and watching what I'm responsible for.
32:29
H and I just don't know how I got here, you know what I
32:31
mean, It's just it just didn't make any sense to me. And in
32:36
that moment, I just couldn't understand what what you know, what what my
32:39
next steps were? Like? What just looking for what even look like like
32:43
I don't I don't really messed up, like really messed up, you know.
32:49
And so that's that's what has gotten me to where sentenced with life plus
32:55
six before was from that poor decision, from a series of poor decision making,
33:02
from a commitment to a poor lifestyle like after follow the bread comes back
33:07
to skipping school, and tell you that it was poor decision after poor decision,
33:12
and you know, poor perspective of the poor perspective that led me to
33:15
where I'm at. So his name is his Cowboy, and you know here's
33:22
his the unfortunate his. You know, this whole situation should make is unfortunate.
33:27
Right. But as I sit here and I'm telling you this story,
33:30
this true story, this, this is my life, this is what I'm
33:34
responsible for, right right, the young man Kyle Boy died to Christy like
33:40
two decembers ago. He passed away, had a seizure and his sleep passed
33:45
away, right, and just imagine what his life has looked like, like
33:49
he lost the love of his life at that moment violently to a young man
33:54
that he had had street beef, nonsense, street beef with right, and
34:00
then you know he he's had a turbulent life since that. He's had sea
34:05
Jersey. He was in a color for a few months, like he had
34:07
he was on dialysis. Like the man has struggled and at the hands of
34:13
another man, that man be and me he has struggled from my poor decision
34:16
for my actions. And then he passes away, young in his thirties,
34:21
right. Crystal unfortunately passed away that day. The other innocent Bostander, her
34:28
name was Missus Hollifield. I said their names because it's important that we don't
34:31
call it. We we acknowledged that they're people, right right. But she
34:38
she was in her fifties at the time, and this was almost two decades
34:42
because and you know, God bless her our pradit she was, you know,
34:45
been able to live and it's still alive, healthy life outside of the
34:50
trumbas and woes. And she she suffered in my hands, but who knows
34:53
she made me gone. My co defended. His name was Great Holiday.
34:58
Uh. He passed away in car accident three years ago. Like anybody that
35:02
was there on that day, and everybody that was affected by my poor decision
35:07
making, it's either passed away faith or more than likely close to it.
35:14
You know, I'm the only one. I mean, I got all ten
35:16
toes. I have never been shot. Like I'm the only one left.
35:21
That's a lie. And well, you know, I could talk to my
35:24
mom, I could talk to my dad, like you know, it's hard,
35:29
it's hard living today by day carrying that if that makes sense. You
35:36
know, I'm responsible for all of this, and I'm the one that's blessed
35:38
with life like that. It's a trip to me. It's really is.
35:45
When you I want you to, I want you to call me right back,
35:47
because my next question to you is I want to know how do you
35:53
feel? How do you feel about that? Right when you come back?
35:59
You can't answer that question when you when you when you call me back,
36:06
of course, right now the caller has hung up. Wow. Wow.
36:16
All I can say is, well, I didn't want to hear his story.
36:23
I'm just finding out his story just as you as he's telling it,
36:30
and I wanted to basically know how he got to that point. You know,
36:37
he was giving me little bits and pieces of it when we was This
36:44
is a pre but like I said, I'm just finding out myself and I
36:52
diagnostics like that out and follow facility instructions to register this number as a private
37:02
number to accept charges. Thank you for using Securis. You may start the
37:07
conversation now, Hello, go ahead, Chris. So you know, I
37:15
think it's important, uh to not tell you exactly how to today. First,
37:20
I think it's important to show you that you know from the from the
37:24
very beginning, from the moment that I realized what I had done. I
37:30
have been extremely uh hurt and devastated, guilty, shameful, like I have
37:38
been just told about the fact that Crystal lost her life and her family at
37:46
the age might be because something that I had did, right, Like,
37:52
it's just not fear, you know. I see I sat there and went
37:57
through my proceedings in court, and her grand father, mister Orlando, like
38:00
he every court here and mister Orlando Martinez was there. You know. I
38:07
watched. I watched our community people I went to school with, come in
38:13
and just just cry. I watched her mother you don't understand, and just
38:16
you know, break down, you know, her her little sister and her
38:21
brother asking me why, like I I just don't even you can. You
38:25
couldn't tell them why. You can't. You couldn't. You couldn't tell them
38:30
why because you really didn't know why. There's no excuse nothing, There's no
38:37
excuse. There's nothing that could be said. I could say, I could
38:42
just send and say hey man, my house. I could do all of
38:44
that all day long. And the truth is, there is no excuse for
38:51
senseless violence. There's no excuse for the loss of life violence. There's none.
38:57
And so It took me years to understand that I have no justification right
39:05
like I It took me for years. I was mad at Kadle and I
39:08
did this. I was like, man, if he wouldn't be if he
39:12
wouldn't have ran at me, if he wouldn't have shut my house, I
39:14
was mad at him. I felt like he owned some responsibility in this like
39:19
I had to. I had to understand. I had to grow through bitterness
39:22
and shame. I had to understand that Chris, you did this right,
39:28
You made decisions good you. You twisted your fingers up and said you was
39:32
from this hood. You put a gun in your pocket today you walked out
39:37
of the house like you have to. You have to own every step that
39:42
you took that leeds you up into that moment, right, And that's that's
39:50
what's hard, because once you own or your decision making is to go with
39:54
anybody else do. Once you own with you here and how you responded,
39:59
you at the own the consequences. So you have to you have to own
40:04
the fact that you can't justify this right. So from your first proceedings front,
40:10
when you started going to the court proceedings was you did you own it?
40:17
Then? Well, you know, I didn't. I never got a
40:22
chance to take the stand. You know, my lawyers told me not to,
40:28
and you know, looking back, I feel like that was a very
40:30
very poor uh decision and poor legal advice because at the end of the day,
40:37
you know, nobody can say who, well, when, where and
40:40
why from my perspective to me, so I didn't have a chance to say,
40:44
hey, this is what's going on, this is what I was thinking,
40:46
how I was feeling. I didn't have a chance to do anything that
40:49
about court proceedings, right, and so like once I was sentenced, then
40:53
I had an opportunity to adjust the court and of course, you know,
40:58
I that my first thing. I did apologize to her family for everything,
41:01
you know what I mean, I had to own it, and you know
41:06
I shot away from you know, saying that and anybody made me do anything,
41:14
you know, as much as I felt justified it in my response at
41:17
that moment, I didn't want to disrespect her family or or the loss or
41:22
the try. I don't want to disrespect the situation any more than I already
41:25
had. So I definitely owned and apologize again, like you know, so
41:34
acknowledging that hey, I'm that stuff is one thing, but there's nothing that
41:37
I can say to that better. Right, So when the judge sentenced you,
41:42
when you heard the time that you was that when he handed down,
41:51
what kind of emotions did you? You know, how did you feel knowing
41:57
that you just got sentenced to life without the possibility plus sixty four years on
42:04
top of that? You know, in that moment, in that moment,
42:10
like, I'm I see things a little differently now, but in that moment,
42:15
I couldn't. I could not believe that somebody could shoot up go home
42:21
right where your people is in that Willison's flying all the way through it and
42:24
all the good you know that comes look at and then you know, you
42:29
just seeing yourself when somebody's running ask you in that moment, right, I
42:32
couldn't believe that they would say that you deserve to go to prison for the
42:37
rest of your life. You are a threat to society, you should not
42:43
walk the streets. Ever, again, all things considered, I just it
42:47
didn't make sense in that moment. And while I do understand to this day,
42:53
I understood that there was a loss of life and that ain't no,
42:58
that ain't nothing to just go loss over, like that's real you know,
43:01
you can't come back from that. I just I felt I was torn because
43:07
I said, I know I've messed up with God Lee, right, I
43:09
got to die in prison and somebody can push this line on me in my
43:15
family. And that's just that, you know, And y'all just send me
43:19
all to the far corners of the state to figure it out. Like I
43:22
couldn't understand it in that moment, if that makes sense, you know.
43:27
Yeah, So it was a lot of Yeah, it was a lot.
43:30
It was a lot. So okay, now you twenty, you don't got
43:34
your sentence, send it to you, and they send you to what was
43:39
the first what was your first adult prison? You did? I hit?
43:47
I hit Sterling Correctional Facility. And you know, I mean, of course
43:53
Sterlin had had a reputation me being a little younger, and and you know,
43:59
here here's the sad thing about coming to prison young. You know,
44:05
I don't have any kids that I've never had my driver's license, I've never
44:08
have my own apartment, Like I don't have any life experiences as an adult,
44:14
Like I've been incarcerated all of two and a half months since the age
44:16
of eighteen. Like I don't have anything. So I said all that to
44:21
say this that when you come in young, it's so easy to become conditioned
44:25
to this environment, as opposed to coming in when you're forty or fifty with
44:30
a home, a wife, you know, three kids, a grandkid,
44:34
and then you get locked up. It's it's like, oh my god,
44:37
you know, it's so traumatizing. But when you get locked up young,
44:40
you know, you get it's so easy to just get you know, caught
44:45
up right in the day in, day out life of prison. Because when
44:51
you get here, it's game band still. When you get here, it's
44:53
your enemies. When you get here, it's your homies. When you get
44:57
here, that gambling like, it's it's a reflection of the streets. And
45:00
in all truth and all reality, the streets, people in the streets end
45:05
up in prison. So when you get there, it's like, hey,
45:07
what's up. You know, hey, well this way you been like I
45:10
ain't seeing you in here. And so when you come in young, it's
45:13
so sad because you just don't have adult perspective, you don't have an understanding.
45:20
It's just how you know, just how real this is about to get
45:24
for you, And so you end up becoming conditioned easily to this environment.
45:31
You know, so I hits thrilling and I believe so strongly now in my
45:37
appeals, I said, oh, yeah, this ain't right. They can't
45:39
do this. This ain't right. You know, I said something about to
45:43
shake and I listen tomorrow telling boy, I said, yeah, yeah,
45:45
you're right, I'm trying that. I told you they shouldn't be an a
45:49
BN. See this is wrong. You miss that, and I believe.
45:52
And when they fail, they said, hey, this is as far as
45:55
I can go. Your appeals are over. It's on you now, Stirling.
46:00
You know what I mean the life sense, people who are people are
46:04
all being here, people are getting killed here, and you know, I'm
46:07
surviving best the way I can, like, you know, like this is
46:09
the trip. And then you know, the last piece of hope at that
46:14
time was like, well uh it felled. It didn't work. You know,
46:19
you have your pills are over, figure it out, you know.
46:22
I was like, yeah, this is crazy. So you have come to
46:28
see me. It's the truth. Yeah. I remember, I remember seeing
46:30
you on your dad out on a visit. You you exhalted all your pills.
46:42
Yeah, right now, as of right now, all my pills are
46:45
exhausted. And you know, I did the best that I could, especially
46:51
without having a real representation like I thought, I learned, I study,
46:55
I did the best that I could. I filed three thirty five seeds.
46:59
You only need support of the follow one. You know, I had to
47:01
do everything in wrong hand to save enough money to get a typewriter and you
47:07
know, land on my family for a few legal books. And I did
47:09
the best that I could. My fault, however, you know this grandmother
47:15
used to say that trouble was easy to get into a hard to get out
47:17
of. You know, the system isn't designed for it's not bizarre for people
47:24
with long terms to successfully reintegrate, if that makes sense. It's it's you
47:30
know, it's it says on one hand that you know, we believe in
47:36
rehabilitation reintegration, right, and that's on one hand is the vision. But
47:42
you have so many people in here with life sentences and virtual life sentences that
47:45
we will never reintegrate. And you know, working where I work, I
47:50
see I see people literally served out that sentence and its entirety meeting. I
47:53
see people die in prison. You know what I mean? Like I know
48:00
exactly what it looks like to starry about life in prison because I see people
48:07
die here and it's it's scary, it's humbling, it's sad, and it's
48:13
just it's reflective of what the intention of a life without for all means.
48:19
It means die there, and that to me is just it's it's crazy because
48:22
it said that I'm unredeemable, you know what I mean, Hey man,
48:28
I'm not saying to be in society, and that's just that's just not fair.
48:31
I understand being accountable for your actions, but to say that, hey,
48:36
you know you've been to hear some fewer twenty die here from the action
48:38
you did twenty years ago. I don't care who you are, what you've
48:42
grown into. I don't care die here. It just doesn't seem redemptious.
48:46
It doesn't seem like it's design for rehabilitation in This is what Pete Lee said.
48:58
Pete Lee said, kids that do felony stupid things when they are sixteen,
49:05
seventeen, eighteen, twenty years old are not the same as as people
49:13
that's in their thirties, forties or fifty years. So that's what Pete Leasey
49:20
said, and that you know they're no longer redeemables. Yeah, I mean,
49:29
let's let's let's let's put it into perspective. I think everybody that's listening
49:34
unless you're that age right now, has been eighteen nineteen twenty before. And
49:39
just think about your regrets and your decision making at that age, all right,
49:44
think about the way you manage money, Think about the way you you
49:49
were in relationship, Like, think about the things you valued at that age,
49:53
think about your party and like, think about your decision making as a
49:58
kid, right, and then look back twenty thirty forty years and just think
50:04
about all, man, if I do, if I do now, what
50:07
our if I do then, what I do now? Like, think about
50:09
what that statement even means. And it just shows that we as people,
50:15
we grow, we mature, we developed, we experience, we touch the
50:21
stores and we learned that it's hot. Like, we are not beyond learned
50:27
and we are not beyond correction. Right, So just in principal, people
50:34
are not beyond creation. So then how do we have people forever? And
50:39
then and then if you look at who people become while incarcerated, right,
50:44
like you have people that have become authors, you have people that are business
50:47
owners, you have people that have become in towards like you have people that
50:52
work around people and are not a danger to people, right, and they
50:58
not be fitting for society if they're fit in this capacity to work with you
51:05
know what I mean, It just doesn't it doesn't make sense. It's right
51:07
right right. Well, on that note, On that note, we're almost
51:15
out of time, and I'm going to invite you back April fifteenth, same
51:22
time so we can finish this discussion. And I would like to thank everyone
51:29
for joining in tonight. As we talked to Chris, I know it probably
51:35
kind of was a little uncomfortable. Was it a little uncomfortable for you to
51:44
talk or was it okay? Chris? You know, I'm gonna be honest,
51:49
like I've learned that what I'm respondingle for is not it's terrible. It's
51:57
horrible, but I've learned to make that special. And by that I mean
52:02
I shared my story with the intent to promote change, ideas and contests to
52:07
anybody that listened. I use my experiences as a roadmap of what not to
52:12
do, and I use the man that I've tould come and I follow those
52:15
Blair comes back and articulate that to people I shared my story daily weekly.
52:22
So I've found healing and expressing it and owning it and using it for good
52:29
and to serve people instead of just hiding and shame behind it. So to
52:34
answer your question, it was not uncomfortable. It was the first time I
52:37
told it. You have to become comfortable with the truth because the truth don't
52:40
change. You have to live with that. So I use the truth to
52:44
aspire to motivate and to help develop other young people that I'm around or old
52:50
people whoever listen. I do the best that I can. So no,
52:52
it wasn't uncomfortable. I apologize if if I made anybody uncomfortable by speaking so
52:58
candidly about what I'm responsible before. But I promise you I need no harm.
53:02
I only need to be honest, to be transparent and to encourage others
53:09
to not go down the path that I'm calling down. And we understand that,
53:14
and we thank you for being so honest with us and telling us the
53:16
truth. Thank you family for stopping by again for let's talk about it.
53:22
I'll see you on April fifteenth when we will continue this conversation with Chris Christopher
53:30
Taylor. Christopher Taylor, have a good night and be blessed a thing we
53:53
did, all the Scott's