Latest / What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie? / #335: What We Do in the Shadows (2014)

Transcript

#335: What We Do in the Shadows (2014) · What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie?

0:06
Hello, what's your least favorite scary movie?
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I go for a look which I call Dead but Delicious.
0:15
Welcome. What's your least favorite scary
0:17
movie? The podcast where we talk about
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the good, the bad, the ugly, in the absurd, and all of our
0:21
favorite. And least favorite?
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Scary movies. Because we believe every horror
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movie rightfully has its fan base.
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Even if we don't always get it. My name's Travis.
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My name's Jesse. And welcome everybody, we are
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back for another episode. This week we are talking about
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what we do in the shadows. Yay, the movie, not the TV show.
0:39
Yes, yes. But before we get into that, do
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we have any announcements? We will have A to be or not to
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be this weekend. Yeah, it is Travis's pick.
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Yep. I think I already know what it's
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going to be, OK. Yeah, which we we didn't do an
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Easter one this year. Oh, we didn't.
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This weekend was too busy. That may change things, maybe, I
1:00
don't know. It'll be after Easter so I don't
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know if I'll have the same if. Yeah, we're we're recording this
1:03
on Easter Day. So we are, yeah, yeah, to behind
1:06
the curtains a little bit there, but yeah, OK, be on the lookout
1:09
for that. Who knows what it will be?
1:10
Who knows. Also, if you are a budget to
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your patron and you say, hey, we saw two of the movies listed on
1:19
the schedule as our options to vote.
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We had a tie on the vote for the Patreon pick movie.
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And because there was one more Thursday in April than we
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realized, we just decided our tiebreaker would be to do them
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both. Yeah.
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So you know that everybody wins in that situation right there.
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So I'm happy with. It so win, win, win.
1:38
Exactly. Cool.
1:40
All right. Well, I guess if that's all we
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got, I'm ready to go on. I am too.
1:43
All right, cool, let's get started.
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Tell me about this movie, Travis.
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What We Do in the Shadows premiered January 19th, 2014 at
1:52
the Sundance Film Festival, had its wide release February 13th,
1:56
2015. We watched it on Fandango at
1:59
home. You will have to rent this if
2:02
you want to stream it. Currently it is not on any
2:04
streaming options and it's only able to be rented on Fandango,
2:10
YouTube or Apple TV or. Google TV.
2:13
Or Google TV, which I think is part of YouTube.
2:15
I don't know. I, I, I truly don't know.
2:18
Just try, try and find it wherever you want to.
2:20
And yeah. It's worth the $4.
2:22
Yeah, yeah, it is $3 if you don't care to watch in standard
2:27
definition, if you're not a snob.
2:29
The high definition wasn't worth the extra dollar.
2:31
It wasn't, you know, it really wasn't.
2:34
I kind of regret that extra dollar now.
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So it's written and directed by Jermaine Clement and Taika
2:40
Waititi. Music by Plan 9.
2:42
Special effects make up by Don Brooker, Steve Boyle and Doug
2:47
Falconer. Starring Jermaine Clement as
2:50
Vladislav, Taika Waititi as Viago, Johnny Brue as Deacon,
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Corey Gonzalez Mercure as Nick, Stu Rutherford as Stu and Ben,
3:02
Freshman as Peter, and Jackie Van Beek as Jackie.
3:06
OK, all right, time for her favorite game on the show.
3:08
Budget or budgeted? I'm going to say bug head.
3:15
Yeah, yeah, Bug Head. Surprisingly, I do have a number
3:17
here. It is 1.6 million, OK.
3:20
Yeah, not too bad, yeah. Opening box office was 88,000
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with a worldwide gross 8.9 million.
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Nice. Yeah, so it made its money.
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IMDb score 7.6. Good.
3:31
Yeah, really, really high. So I've got 3 movies from 2014.
3:35
So here's The funny thing. Jesse has realized that we have
3:39
kind of accidentally chosen a lot of 2014 movies this.
3:42
Month. No, no, no.
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It's 2014 and 2019 plus Final destination.
3:47
I'm going to let you know a little thing.
3:49
The movie that I am thinking of doing for Tubi is also 2014.
3:53
That was completely unintentional.
3:55
Oh boy. Yeah, no, we really didn't mean
3:56
to. We were just, I guess these were
3:58
just good years for horror comedies and we were kind of
4:01
doing a quasi horror comedy theme.
4:03
Yeah, yeah. So it just kind of worked out
4:05
that way. But I do have 3 from 2014 to
4:08
compare this one to. I have a theme.
4:11
It's all creatures that meet in the final, like dance situation.
4:17
I can't remember what they called it.
4:18
It's like the little like the group that they have where it's
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like all of the supernatural monster type characters.
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In the in the movie they call it the The Unholy Masquerade.
4:30
That's what I'm talking about right there.
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Yeah, all the groups that convene there.
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So starting off, we'll we'll do Wolf the Wolf movie that year,
4:37
Wolf Cop. OK.
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That came out June 6th, 2014. One million budgets worldwide
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gross. I don't know.
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IMDb 5.6. That's rude.
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We're. Talking about both the Wolf Coff
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movies on our TV or not to be episodes if you want to go
4:54
check. Those out, yeah, a lot of fun.
4:56
I love those movie #2 zombies. The movie is Dead Snow 2, Red
5:02
versus Dead. OK, that came out October 7th
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with a 35 million budget in the currency of N OK, I don't know
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what currency that is. Maybe Norwegian?
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Either way it's worldwide. Gross 1.1 million IMDb 6.8.
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OK, not seeing either of those movies but I am interested.
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OK effort that they're good. Final movie The Witches.
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This is Paranormal Activity, The Marked Ones, which came out
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January 3rd, 2014. Five million Budget Worldwide
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Gross 90.8 million IMDb 5.1. Should we watch Paranormal
5:38
Activity 4 last night and I'll come to the conclusion that I
5:40
think Catherine Newton might be a witch or a vampire because.
5:45
Looks about the same. Yeah, yeah, I know.
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Well, she aged up a little. Bit I'm confused by her age I.
5:51
I am too. You could tell me she's 20 and
5:53
you could tell me she's 40, and I would believe both.
5:55
Yeah, like a good forty. I'm not saying that.
5:57
Yeah, she looks young. Yeah.
5:59
Yeah, she's yeah. Got that same look.
6:01
She's like seeing her in a movie from like 2012.
6:03
It was like. She's immediately recognized.
6:06
Her yeah, I was like, this is weird.
6:08
OK, so we have one tackle and it's pretty good.
6:11
Sad. Some interviews with some
6:14
vampires that's not too. Bad.
6:18
That's a good one. Yeah.
6:19
OK, so it's time for some fun facts.
6:21
So this is based on a 2005 short that Komet Komet and Taika
6:26
Waititi did together, which was called What We Do in the Shadows
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interview with some vampires. It starred Jermaine, Taika
6:34
Waititi, Knicks actor, which was Corey Gonzalez and also Stu.
6:41
They took seven years to write this movie.
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One of the fun things about this is the real life Stew is an
6:50
actual IT tech. In real life.
6:53
He's a high school friend of Taika and they told him his role
6:57
was going to be a bit part. And they did all of this so he
7:00
would act more natural during his filming in the movie.
7:03
And he did not realize how big of a role his character had in
7:07
the movie until he went to the premiere.
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So even even after getting bit by a werewolf.
7:12
See, the way that I take this is he probably, they probably said
7:16
we're filming a lot of stuff, we're just going to do this in
7:18
like 1 quick compilation type thing and then we'll just use
7:22
the good bits. And then what ended up happening
7:24
is like they made the whole movie centered around Stu
7:27
basically. That's amazing.
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But that's genius. I love that because his
7:30
performance is so casual in this movie.
7:32
And that's just actually Stu. Does just seem like somebody's
7:36
sister's ex-boyfriend is just kind of hanging.
7:40
Yeah, it's, it's amazing. So to kind of back that up, they
7:43
they filmed 125 hours of footage.
7:45
Jesus. And most of it is improv, so.
7:49
This is a lot like actual reality TV.
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Yeah, it actually is. Like they actually were kind of
7:54
making a documentary and they had to just actually put
7:57
everything together like that. With all of that footage, they
8:01
they only showed one person, the script nobody, none of the
8:04
actors other than one person didn't specify who it was.
8:07
Got to see it. So that let them have just the
8:10
beats of everything and they just went along with it and did
8:13
improv and just make everything feel a bit more natural and
8:15
spontaneous. And it's from the same group
8:17
that did Flight of the Conchords.
8:19
Yeah. That makes sense.
8:20
Yeah, that does make a lot of sense and a cool thing that they
8:24
speculated on doing. I don't know if they ever did
8:26
this, but they wanted to release all 125 hours of footage for
8:31
fans to be able to take the movie and edit their own
8:33
versions of it if they ever wanted to.
8:35
That's fun. Yeah, I like that.
8:37
So part of the funding for this movie was from a Kickstarter.
8:41
They raised $447,000 with 7000 supporters.
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I took a look at their Kickstarter page to see what all
8:48
they had. They didn't really have anything
8:50
crazy in terms of goals, so it was just basically get a T-shirt
8:54
or to get a signed DVD copy. They had like meet and greets.
8:57
You can go to the premiere and stuff like that where they would
9:00
do a Skype call with you and stuff like that.
9:02
So that was about the extent of that.
9:04
The the vampires, they're all based off of different vampires
9:07
from different vampire media. So starting off with Peter, he's
9:11
Count Warlock from those Frock 2.
9:12
Very clearly. Deacon, Who's David from Lost
9:15
Boys? That makes sense, yeah.
9:17
Yeah, well, he's the one that does the Bisghetti.
9:19
Yeah, it will. And he's also like the sexy
9:22
young. Yeah, exactly.
9:25
Vlad is the Gary Oldman Dracula. Well, he even does the Gary
9:29
Oldman 1990 Dracula hair. Yeah, exactly.
9:33
Nick was based off of Edward from Twilight.
9:40
No, no. He's Twilight from Twilight.
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Yeah, he's Twilight from Twilight.
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Listen, I'm just gonna call bullshit on the research to this
9:48
because Edward was not out there Willy nilly telling people he's
9:51
a vampire or turning people into vampires.
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To be fair, he also was terrible about hiding his vampireness.
9:59
Well, yeah, but he didn't straight up say like, unless
10:02
we're talking about the end of New Moon where he's like.
10:06
I suppose, yeah. Viago, by the way, was I'm going
10:10
to try my best to pronounce this, but Louis de Point Duluc
10:14
from Interview with the Vampire, you would probably know that
10:18
better than I do. I'm not very familiar with that
10:20
property. So, yeah, they also had like a
10:23
lot of inspiration from all kinds of other vampire media.
10:27
Buffy was cited as one of the influences.
10:30
I imagine maybe the Slayer that they encounter may have been,
10:33
although it would have made more sense for.
10:34
Vampire hunter like and not that goes back like that's as old as
10:39
vampires themselves. I mean, you got Van Helsing, you
10:42
know that's true. You're right.
10:43
Yeah, OK. Never.
10:44
Mind, it's like the OG. So they nearly did a sequel to
10:48
this movie. It's something that's been up in
10:50
the air as recently as the Twenty 20s.
10:53
They've talked about wanting to do this, they just have never
10:55
pulled the trigger on it. But it would have been a sequel
10:58
featuring the wolf characters of this.
11:01
A lot of people thought it was going to be called What We Do in
11:03
the Moonlight, but what they actually ended up having for
11:06
their title is We're Wolves, which is that I think it's a
11:10
really good point on words. Why T TS got that Marvel money
11:14
now? Yeah, he can do whatever he
11:16
wants. He should.
11:18
And I think that his time in Marvel has kind of fizzled out
11:22
because that last Thor movie, I've not seen it, but I've heard
11:25
a lot of people say it's kind of not great.
11:28
And that's pretty impressive because a lot of people have
11:31
tried to tell me that the first two Thor movies are really
11:33
great. The first Thor movie it's OK,
11:36
the second one absolutely sucks. I've tried watching it multiple
11:39
times, could never sit. There, Ragnarok is the only one
11:41
that I've actually watched and Android.
11:43
That was the only fun one, and that was YTT.
11:45
Yeah, Speaking of that, that never did come to fruition.
11:48
Obviously we don't have that yet, but it's still a maybe.
11:52
So we may be fun, yeah. However, we have had things
11:55
spawn from this movie. So there are two TV shows
11:58
actually that came from this. First one, Wellington
12:01
Paranormal, which is about the cops that they encounter.
12:05
OK, they get their own spin off which I guess is them
12:08
encountering multiple paranormal creatures.
12:10
Almost kind of like Angel. And it kind of is.
12:13
You're right, my God, because. Kate is kind of the paranormal
12:17
investigator foiling Angel. You're right, man, that's
12:21
perfect and. Can you refer to a foil as a
12:26
verb? Is that is that proper?
12:28
Well, you just did. So, you know, I think, I guess
12:31
there is now a thing. This is where people will go to
12:35
cite that origin. And obviously they had the What
12:38
We Do in the Shadows TV show, which I've seen an episode of.
12:43
I would love to start that. I love some of the concepts that
12:46
they introduced in the show. The energy vampire.
12:48
Energy vampire is my favorite thing.
12:50
They also have an emotional vampire, which is somebody that
12:53
is just, like, all drama, and it's just emotionally draining
12:56
to be around. Yeah.
12:58
So, you know, not seeing it. Can't really comment too much on
13:02
this show, but I'm interested. So that's that much.
13:05
And that's it. That's it for the information
13:07
that I have for this. So OK, Yeah, I guess we're ready
13:10
to go into our good Baddakleen. Absurd.
13:12
Jesse, would you like? It is a really fun time.
13:16
Like you can tell that there's a lot of love for the vampire
13:21
genre. Yeah, yeah.
13:22
In it. I like that it it adheres to the
13:26
grand tradition of No2 vampire lawyers being alike.
13:30
I appreciate that too. I like that it's like a it's an
13:33
amalgamation of it all from all the different sources of
13:36
mainstream media. And I like that we get a mixture
13:40
of like some actual horrifying deaths versus like some that are
13:45
done comically because like Viago constantly just like
13:49
hitting. The main artery, yeah.
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And. Like, just a spray of blood
13:53
everywhere, but then like Peter's death is actually
13:56
horrifying. Oh man, I feel bad for Peter
13:58
too. It was so bad.
14:00
And like, like them be like, turn the cameras off, like we
14:03
just lost a good friend like and that makes sense because, you
14:06
know, they're talking about one of their own dying.
14:08
So it makes sense why they would center the emotions those ways.
14:12
Well, I mean, they have like hundreds of years of attachment,
14:14
yeah, so it's a whole different story.
14:17
You just got to feel kind of bad for Peter, 'cause he's just down
14:20
there in his little stone casket.
14:23
Just. Peter.
14:24
See, this is all Peter's. This is Peter is the Carlyle of
14:27
this movie. Here he curated his group of
14:29
friends. Here.
14:30
They're all Peter's boys. But yeah, I think this like, and
14:33
it just has some really funny parts.
14:35
I think seeing Nick become a vampire and his like his
14:39
existential crisis with it all, I think it's really great.
14:42
And then I like the fact that Stu brings them all together,
14:45
dude at the end, like seeing the werewolves just like hanging
14:48
out. And then again.
14:51
And this I think is a little bit of the Buffy and the Twilight of
14:54
it all with Viago and Catherine at the end where he's like, I
14:57
know the age gap is a little scandalous.
15:00
Like what's this 96 year old woman doing with somebody four
15:04
times her age? Yeah.
15:06
Yeah, that's funny. Yeah.
15:07
So I think I, I think we've got some or like, you know, them
15:11
talking about you're stuck at the age that you're turned at
15:14
and they see those two little girls and they're like, oh,
15:16
we're going to go kill some benefits.
15:17
Yeah. What are you all up to The Oh,
15:18
yeah. I for a second I thought that
15:20
those were just like little kids and like that was just like kids
15:22
doing that. Yeah, for a minute I was like,
15:24
all right. So it was stuck to be like
15:26
permanently stuck as a child. Yeah.
15:28
I hate that, yeah. So I, I, I don't know if I'd
15:32
hate that more than being like a 96 year old.
15:35
Woman. Yeah, that would suck too.
15:36
Is it? Do you still have like
15:39
arthritis? I was thinking the same thing I
15:41
feel. I imagine some of that stuff
15:43
heals when you become a vampire just based off of all the
15:46
vampire. Wars, but like, they can even
15:48
start to look age and deteriorated.
15:50
Like think about Vlad. You know when he he stops
15:54
hunting for a while 'cause he's so upset about the beast being
15:57
the guest of honor. Wow.
15:58
Yeah. And look at Peter.
16:01
Yeah, although Peter, he kind of probably always looked like
16:04
that, if I had to guess. Do you think he looked like that
16:07
when he was a human? Yeah, probably that's why I
16:11
became a vampire, because he was an outcast.
16:14
OK. But yeah, I just think I think
16:16
it's really fun. I think it's, it's one of those
16:18
things, you know, it's similar to like Leslie Vernon, where you
16:21
have to have a lot of love for the genre to be able to pull
16:24
this off effectively. Yeah, and I'm going to piggyback
16:28
on a lot of what you said there because, I mean, I I love just
16:31
the way that this movie flows. My favorite parts being the
16:35
addition of Nick and Stu. I think it was a great idea to
16:39
have Nick be brought into the fold because we get the process
16:42
of like a like how it starts and we're basically seeing
16:46
everything from a new lens within there.
16:49
And Stu is just such a fun character to have.
16:52
And Stu is like, I like that they take him on as like their
16:55
pet. Yeah, basically.
16:57
And I'm just gonna say this is somebody who watches a lot of
17:00
reality TV, which I understand is different than a documentary,
17:04
but whatever. You have hours and hours and
17:07
hours of this footage, and the editors have to craft together
17:10
some sort of narrative. And depending on the type of
17:12
show there is, it might not be like, you know, you've got
17:15
something like Survivor or The Traitors or whatever, where
17:18
there's very clear narrative that they need to have.
17:20
Like, you want to highlight certain characters because
17:22
they're going to become either a major hero or a major villain.
17:25
But then you've got something like, say, Dance Moms and you
17:29
know, they compete week after week, but it's not like, you
17:31
know, we're going for who's going to be the number one dance
17:34
mod. Like, you know, it's not like
17:36
that. You just have all of this
17:37
footage or like Secret Lives of Mormon Wives.
17:39
So you have all these hours of footage and you have to figure
17:42
out what kind of a story you're telling.
17:43
And it's not necessarily going to be linear storytelling.
17:47
You know, you're just kind of watching these things happen and
17:48
you start picking up on threads and eventually there's a payoff
17:51
to some of those threads. And that's what happens in this
17:53
movie because you know, you're just seeing them kind of go like
17:56
Day in the Life, which if it was a real documentary, you don't
18:00
necessarily have to end up with like a tied up conclusion.
18:04
But with this, we do get a tied up conclusion because it is,
18:07
after all, not real. It is a movie.
18:09
We do want a story. Yeah, it does feel a little
18:12
sudden, but we do get a conclusion at least.
18:16
Like things like all of a sudden kind of like wrap up nicely.
18:18
It it feels very season finale at the end for me.
18:21
Yeah, that's how I got all right.
18:22
That's the feeling I got to. Yeah, I guess like speaking on
18:25
that right there, though, I guess you would have to give
18:27
props to the editing too, because to take 125 hours and
18:30
turn that into an hour and a half and make it cohesive,
18:34
especially when it's a majority improv like that, I, I imagine
18:38
you probably lose track on a lot of things.
18:40
I mean, they did have a script, but nobody followed it.
18:44
Like, I mean, that was like, it was just like an outline
18:47
basically is all they had. So, you know, like, yeah, the
18:49
other thing was good, too. That's a good point to bring up
18:52
right there. Like, everybody here is funny.
18:54
Everybody, like, this is like, this is like, probably a comedy
18:57
first and foremost with horror elements to it.
19:00
There's enough horrifying stuff for it to be considered a horror
19:03
movie for me. That's you.
19:04
Yeah. Yeah.
19:05
But yeah, I mean, it's just a funny movie.
19:06
These guys are good at what they do.
19:07
And I don't know, like I just have a great time watching this
19:10
thing. OK, Bad stuff.
19:13
Bad stuff. I don't really have like a ton
19:17
of bad stuff for this, like I said.
19:19
And it like, you know, you could almost point to the fact that
19:22
there doesn't feel like a cohesive story.
19:24
But like I said, that makes it feel more documentary style to
19:28
me and especially knowing that they shot it documentary style.
19:31
Yeah, exactly makes. It all the more impressive.
19:33
I guess if I had one thing, I would want a little bit more
19:37
conclusion to Jackie's story. I mean, we see that eventually
19:41
she does get turned, but it's by Nick and she makes her husband
19:44
her familiar. Like I would like to know a
19:46
little bit more of the thought from that.
19:47
Because she was Vlad's familiar. And.
19:50
Like I know him and no, she was Deacon's familiar and Deacon and
19:55
Nick have been going out. Like I would have liked to see a
19:56
little bit more resolution with those plot lines.
19:59
Yeah, I would have been nice to have some light shed on that,
20:04
especially with that dynamic with her family there too,
20:06
because like, how are they cool with that, you know?
20:09
I mean, I guess it's, you know, maybe they're, maybe she's going
20:14
to, she's going to be the Carlisle, she's going to make
20:16
her family into vampires. But she's making them work for
20:18
it. Like, that's your family.
20:19
You're supposed to love them, you know?
20:21
Do you want to watch them, like, just grow old and die?
20:23
Or you can have them forever. Or you can they can light on
20:27
fire like Peter did. Well, I think she probably wants
20:29
her kids to be a little bit older before she turns them.
20:31
Oh, right. Because we just talked about how
20:32
bad it would be to be a kid forever.
20:34
Yeah, you're right. Never mind.
20:35
All right. Yeah, I'm kind of with you.
20:37
I I don't really have a lot bad that I would say about this.
20:40
I mean, yeah, the ending is a little bit rushed, but I like
20:43
the ending, you know, like it. It's fun.
20:46
I like how it unites the werewolves and the vampires.
20:49
And, you know, I I really don't need much here.
20:52
Like it. It it isn't much of like a
20:54
narrative type of movie for sure.
20:56
It it very much is like a mockumentary to its core.
20:59
More so than a lot of mockumentaries, kind of.
21:02
A lot of them always start out like a mockumentary, but then
21:05
they get caught up in a narrative and it forgets that
21:07
it's supposed to be that. It ends up being a movie
21:09
instead. I'm going to say the one caveat
21:12
to that is the rise of Leslie Vernon because.
21:15
Where it turns that was. Actually intentional, you're
21:17
right. Yeah, that was intentional.
21:18
Yeah, you're right. But no, they they did a good job
21:21
with us. So I don't really have much to
21:22
say. OK.
21:23
No, All right, Ugly stuff. Pedophiles and Nazis.
21:29
Yeah, I was going to say the same thing like zero older
21:31
history and. We're we're talking about the
21:34
movie specifically. And yeah, which it applies to
21:38
all of this stuff, yeah, but Deacon was a Nazi at one point,
21:42
and Vlad was into slavery, and so much so that he's trying to
21:46
bring slavery back into the house.
21:48
Yeah, yeah. So yeah, some not great things.
21:52
I like that, Vyago acknowledges. Like, yeah, Vlad is kind of he's
21:57
not current with the I also love the accents.
22:01
I love that they like do do the accents for that throughout the
22:03
entire thing. Yeah, it's it's really fun them
22:07
doing like the Transylvania type affect that we all know and
22:10
associate with vampirism, even though it's implied they're not
22:14
all from the same area. I like they just do it except
22:18
for Nick. Yeah, Nick, he's like, he's
22:20
straight up Kiwi the entire time.
22:22
Yeah, OK, absurd. Oh.
22:28
I guess when the the cops come in and Viago, who's not very
22:34
good at hypnotism, has like, he's like, you won't find
22:37
anything out of the ordinary. And then like, you know, they're
22:40
just like walking around and all of this absurd stuff is there
22:43
and they're like, you see that? No, no smoke detectors.
22:48
The one part that you related to the most is like this guy down
22:52
here, he's passed out drunk is like you ought should I at least
22:54
give him a blanket or like like fuck I can't remember what she
22:58
says. Like I don't care where
22:59
something is, I just care that he has a blanket on.
23:01
I don't know. It reminded me of you because
23:03
you always need a blanket at all times.
23:04
You always need a blanket. If I die and you're waiting for
23:09
like paramedics or whatever to come get my body, I hope you at
23:12
least cover me up with a blood kit.
23:13
Oh, absolutely. If you don't already have one on
23:16
you, am I absurd? I don't know.
23:20
I I saw Nick had a neck tattoo and it just says taint on the
23:24
side of it I saw. That.
23:26
Too. I was like, who the fuck would
23:27
get a neck tattoo that just says taint?
23:29
And it's in that that like the tattoo, like a clutalic
23:34
squigraphy. Yeah.
23:37
Also I just love stews introduction, but also just
23:42
Stew. But I like Nick.
23:43
He wants to eat him. Somebody like look at him.
23:44
He's like the reddest man I've ever seen.
23:46
I love it like. Red.
23:48
They all love him so much they want to eat him, but they love
23:53
him too. Is Stu the Bella Bella if she
23:58
chose Jake? And just like, I mean, he's the
24:02
Gary Stew of this right here where everybody loves him.
24:06
I just love the part where they're all just walking back
24:09
from the club and they're just chanting and saying like Stew,
24:11
Stew, Stew. They're like almost singing it
24:13
because it's like Stew, Stew, Stew.
24:16
Stew. Stew.
24:19
Yeah, man, I don't know. I just Stew is.
24:21
That was such a great idea to have somebody like Stew.
24:25
It just makes me think of like our pets, Like that's how we are
24:27
with our pets. Yeah.
24:28
We chat their name. Absolutely is.
24:30
We were assigning roles to each of the pets, too.
24:33
It was a good time, yeah. All right, all right, let's rate
24:35
this then. 9 easy. It's so much fun, I have a great
24:39
time watching. It I think I got it right there
24:41
with you too. 9 great movie, real funny.
24:46
Let's talk about it. Starting average 9.
24:48
All right. Every few years, a secret
24:51
society in New Zealand gathers for a special event, the Unholy
24:56
Masquerade. In the months leading up to the
24:58
ball, a documentary crew was granted full access to a small
25:02
group of this society. Each crew member wore a crucifix
25:06
and was granted protection by the subjects of the film.
25:09
Which I must say, Vlad kind of a Dick move.
25:12
He tried to OfferUp cameraman at the end.
25:16
It was either flat. Yeah, it was Vlad because he
25:17
came in late. Yeah.
25:18
Yeah, see, that was another thing.
25:20
What I was talking about before, they remember that they were a
25:22
mockumentary because the camera people are still a character in
25:25
this movie. Yeah, I like that.
25:27
So Diego has his alarm going off.
25:30
He rises up and he goes to check to make sure the Suns down.
25:36
He's like, this is the scariest part of my.
25:38
Day. Yeah, just like slowly opens up
25:39
the curtains. Which that made me wonder what
25:42
like the daytime hours are in New Zealand.
25:45
I didn't think about. That I got very distracted by.
25:48
I was like. Yeah, yeah, good point.
25:51
Yeah, Viago is 379 years old. He is waking up the rest of his
25:55
flatmates because they're going to have a flat meeting.
25:58
Peter is exempt because he's 8000 years old.
26:01
He's afraid of Peter because he's, he's like, come on, man.
26:03
Like we're having a flat meeting.
26:05
You can come if you want to. You don't have to.
26:08
Peter just hisses at him. So they're having a flat
26:11
meeting. It's about responsibilities
26:14
really. He's not trying to single
26:16
anybody out, but really, it's a single Deacon now who's not
26:19
really pulling his weight around the house.
26:21
He hasn't done dishes in five years.
26:23
He's like and they're just stacked up there.
26:25
Yeah, he's the rebellious young vampire, and young being 183
26:29
years old. Yeah.
26:31
And as as you already said, he's the David of the group.
26:34
Yeah, yeah, I didn't notice that until I read that.
26:38
But then like, even seeing the way that he's dressed, I mean,
26:40
it's like almost. Exactly.
26:41
He sleeps upside down in the closet.
26:43
Yeah, you're right. Oh my God there's so many things
26:46
like I need to rewatch this again just to pick up on some of
26:49
this stuff. Yeah, and I like how they say
26:50
he's he's the young bad boy. And it flashes back to his
26:53
origin story where he was a young merchant on foot with
26:57
peddling his. Wares, He just went over to
26:59
Peter's mansion. Peter's.
27:01
Yeah, Vlad is from the medieval times.
27:04
He's a pervert and he also likes to torture people, so he is
27:08
known as Vladislav the Poker because he that was his favorite
27:12
Twitter method, was Pokémon stuff.
27:14
Was it? I feel like they had to be like
27:16
a play on flat the Impaler right?
27:17
Oh, yeah, absolutely. And then it also has like, pay
27:21
off later when Stu is showing them the Internet and Facebook
27:24
and he's just like, oh, you see this little yeah, you can send
27:28
her a message or you can poke her.
27:29
And he goes. Yes, yeah, he's so interested.
27:36
And that is, and I'm just going to say it, that's the only good,
27:41
good benefit. That's the only upside to the
27:44
poke. Feature on Facebook was this.
27:46
Joke in this movie. I think that was around the time
27:48
they removed it though. It served its purpose.
27:50
We can get rid of this feature now.
27:53
I didn't even catch that so that just clicked with me whenever
27:56
you said that. Why he got so amused with the
27:57
poke feature, That's hilarious. Which you know what?
28:02
Again, like you said, 125 hours of footage are good on the
28:05
editors to like, yeah, together see that moment and be like
28:08
joke. Which makes you wonder how many
28:13
other times they made like poke jokes.
28:16
Yeah, there's gotta be several others.
28:19
So we're also getting like a like a montage of pictures of
28:21
them throughout the ages. I I think it's funny that you
28:24
see it during different time periods.
28:26
They dress fashionably in that era, but now they're back to
28:29
their like of the era where they became vampires with their
28:33
wardrobe. I don't know, because The thing
28:36
is like 90s was back in style and I leaned into that really
28:41
hard and it's not in style anymore, but I'm still leaning
28:44
into it. So I think that's just a little
28:46
bit of like. I'm kind of right there with
28:48
you, actually. With your like.
28:50
Where we are, Yeah. Where we grew up, Yeah.
28:53
Yeah, You know, probably right too.
28:55
And also it seems like they have trouble getting into clubs so
28:58
maybe they're not seeing as many fashionable.
29:01
That's, that's one of my, that's one of my favorite parts is like
29:04
where they're like walking down the, like trying to get into
29:08
like the nightlife and they're trying to get invited into the
29:10
bars and stuff like, come on, you have to invite us in.
29:12
Yeah. Which again, here's where we
29:15
talk about the confusing war vampires and how it's
29:18
inconsistent between franchises because in Buffy and Angel it's
29:22
established time and time again that those types of public
29:25
properties. Everybody can come.
29:26
In Yeah, all are welcome. Like that's specifically why he
29:29
can come into the school or the library or.
29:32
Hospital so. I think that's it's just always
29:35
fun trying to catch like, all right, what are their rules in
29:38
this universe? Yeah, yeah, it's nice.
29:41
So Viago came to New Zealand for a girl back a long time ago.
29:46
Her name is Catherine. His servant Philip put the wrong
29:51
postage on his coffin, so it took him 18 months to get to New
29:54
Zealand. And by the time he got there,
29:55
she gotten married. Yeah.
29:57
And I think that's, it's really interesting again, the
30:01
difference in, like, vampire stories because there's a whole
30:06
confusing thing with Dracula and how he moved from Transylvania
30:10
to London. And it's kind of similar, but
30:12
kind of different. We moved for a girl, no.
30:16
No, he didn't move for a girl, but he like had his like coffins
30:20
with the soil and stuff shipped. Oh I see.
30:23
And he was in one of the coffins that was on the Demeter.
30:26
That was the thing that you mentioned about the soils, and I
30:29
was like, I never even knew that that was part of a vampire war.
30:32
Yeah, it's like a whole thing in Dracula.
30:34
Like they have to go and they have to get rid.
30:36
Like they have to cleanse or purify or whatever, all of the
30:39
soil in his various coffins that he's got spread out through
30:41
different properties before they can make sure that he's fully
30:44
dead. Interesting.
30:44
Yeah, he never reconnected with her.
30:47
He was just like, well, she married, she found somebody
30:49
else. She was like.
30:50
She seemed happy and I'd rather her be happy.
30:52
He's like, that made me happy. Yeah.
30:53
And that's kind of sweet. That's true love right there.
30:56
They, they're planning to go out and this is they have to help
30:59
each other out because here's who's talking about we've seen,
31:03
but they can't see in, they can't see in mirrors, but they
31:06
can't have their photographs taken because they have a scrap.
31:08
Oh my God, you're. Right.
31:09
So why not just like do the Cher Horowitz take a Polaroid and do
31:14
it that way? But instead they wouldn't get
31:16
this great gag of them doing drawings of each other's
31:18
outfits. The thing is, they I just not
31:20
thought of it. They had to have that as a role
31:22
or else this movie wouldn't exist because you can't even
31:25
record them if that were the case.
31:27
Yeah, Interesting. OK.
31:29
But I just think it's like one of those, like they had a very
31:31
simple, which I do think is one of the things Stu shows them
31:34
later, but it's just like, it's right there.
31:37
You guys are obviously familiar with the concept of cameras
31:39
because you have a whole fucking scrapbook.
31:41
It just, it made me so aware of that.
31:43
I'm like, because I am you went to you as like how that made me
31:47
think, how does Angel put himself together?
31:48
How does Edward put himself together?
31:51
You know that dude? They both gel their hair up so
31:53
high. Yeah, but OK, Angels is
31:56
constantly made fun of in the show, and Edwards is constantly
31:59
made fun of by us because the higher the hair, the hornier the
32:03
vampire. Yeah, OK.
32:05
OK. We're getting somewhere with
32:07
this now, I guess. If you ever see Edward with flat
32:10
hair, it's 'cause I'm Bella. Just fool.
32:14
That's our head cannon. And you know what many watch
32:17
throughs the math acts it. Tracks, it tracks.
32:21
All right, So they're out, but they're taking the bus I I.
32:25
Love that. Like let's get ready.
32:27
Damn, they're on the buzz and it's almost like that.
32:29
Because you expect them to just like, fly around and stuff like
32:31
be cool vampires. The ending of The Graduate
32:34
because they're sitting on the background.
32:35
Yeah, it's, like, all awkward. Yeah.
32:37
And they're having a hard time getting into any bars because
32:40
nobody, like, will invite them in.
32:42
They're being kind of weird about it.
32:44
So they end up going to the bar that is owned and operated by
32:48
vampires. It's called Big Camara.
32:51
Which is that fucked me up trying to write that down
32:54
because one of our favorite restaurants is Big Kahuna.
32:57
Yeah, and I, I love the shot, like when they're in there and
33:01
it's just like the music playing in like the empty dance floor
33:03
and they're and they're just like going hard.
33:06
Jackie's there. She is getting essentially what
33:09
I refer to as a take out list for the guys.
33:14
They want a guy and a girl, then they want them to be virgins.
33:18
Yeah, and Jackie is Deacon servant.
33:20
Yeah, they have a deal where he's going to turn her into a
33:24
vampire, but he's just kind of stringing her along.
33:27
Yeah, and she's asking for it. She's like, I feel like I'm at
33:29
my peak now. Yeah.
33:30
She's like, this is where I really want to be.
33:32
I want to be turned while I'm, you know, at my best self.
33:35
Viago gives she like he likes to give victims a nice last night.
33:39
So it shows him like trying to have like a nice like kind of
33:43
date with this girl. She's like he's making small
33:46
talk while putting like paper or newspapers on the floor like
33:50
around her. It's funny because one of the
33:52
things they addressed in the flat meeting was blood stains on
33:56
the new rug. He's like, just put down some
33:58
newspaper or towel before, you know, you eat.
34:01
And they're like, who would do that?
34:03
It's like the vampires don't put newspapers in.
34:05
It's like some vampires do and. Then we see him putting down the
34:08
newspapers and towels and it doesn't matter because he hit,
34:12
he hit the carotid and it's. Just blood.
34:16
Blood, yeah, shooting out and he can't catch it off.
34:19
Just like it just like cuts him like just defeated and he's just
34:22
covered in blood. Iced and you've got like chug
34:27
and except you're, you know, racing against time, it's the
34:29
same thing. I just love that defeated look
34:32
on him there. Poor guy.
34:36
Vladislav was once a very powerful vampire.
34:39
He had a lot of capabilities to use with hypnosis, and I
34:44
referred to it as anamorphing. But now he he lost in the he
34:50
lost against a faux called the Beast, and he hasn't been the
34:55
same since. And it shows him at one point,
34:57
this is later, but it is relevant to bring it up now
35:00
because he's like changed into a cat, but he's got his face.
35:04
Yeah, it's terrifying. Yeah, I forgot about that.
35:07
But like in this moment, he's just like standing outside the
35:09
window of somebody trying to get their attention and they're not.
35:12
Look at me. He's like, just watch this or
35:14
they'll turn around and they're just like completely distracted
35:17
on their phone or whatever and he just has to bang on like
35:19
their door this is. You trying to get his attention
35:22
when you were outside the front window on the ladder earlier?
35:24
There is any time we're trying to get Talia's attention, I'm
35:27
like, hey, Talia, Talia. And she just pretends like she
35:30
doesn't hear me, but she's got the best hearing.
35:31
She always. Hears me living room right now
35:33
she's. Like, yeah, exactly.
35:35
She, she always hears, she just ignores.
35:39
I feel quite so hard. So Jackie has gathered victims
35:44
and she's like it. It's she says that it's
35:46
complicated for her because she wants to make sure she gets good
35:49
victims for Deacon, but she also, it can't be anybody she's
35:52
too attached to because obviously they're going to die.
35:55
So she gets a boyfriend from when she was like 12 years old
35:59
and a girl from her class that she didn't like.
36:02
That boyed her, and it started like this whole nickname.
36:05
Yeah. So they they're over at the
36:08
place's flat or the people's flat right now and they're
36:11
brought in for dinner. And they are given some cold ass
36:15
chef birdie. Yeah, and he calls it Biscetti.
36:19
Yeah, Deacon and Deacon this like, he even straight up
36:22
references the Lost Boys. Like I saw this trick from Lost
36:25
Boys, but it's just like you say, hey, you enjoying those
36:28
snails over there or snakes or whatever.
36:30
Worms. Worms is what it is because of
36:32
the that's what they do in the worms, yeah.
36:35
Yeah, yeah, well, 'cause that's how he tricks him into drinking
36:39
the blood, 'cause he changed the rice to maggots, the noodles
36:41
into worms. And then when he's passed the
36:43
wine, he's like, it's blood and stars like no, it's really blood
36:47
and goes ha ha ha, funny joke. And then he he does turn
36:52
something into a snake and it would be Nick's.
36:54
Oh, his Dick. Yeah, that's right.
36:56
Yeah. Yeah.
36:57
And that's when Nick checks out. He's like, all right.
36:59
He turned my. Dick, you know what?
37:00
That's fair. That's.
37:01
The I would get the hell out of there.
37:02
Yeah, get out of there, he tries.
37:04
To If the snake had gotten out of his pants, what happens when
37:07
it's changed back to a Dick? Is it a Dick?
37:10
I imagine. Inside of the body.
37:12
I imagine it is a snake attached to his pelvis.
37:18
That's worse. Yeah.
37:19
It's nice, actually, Yeah. For everybody, like the snake,
37:23
the person, nobody wants that. Yeah.
37:26
So he's trying to get out. Meanwhile, Josephine was the
37:30
other person. She stays behind.
37:33
They they we don't see what happens to her in this moment,
37:35
but she's she gets caught by them.
37:37
Yeah. We see Peter is the one who ends
37:40
up catching Nick before he can get out 'cause he does get out
37:43
the front door eventually, but Peter catches it.
37:46
'Cause we're all fucking with him, he's running through the
37:47
house and every time he goes into a room it's one of the
37:50
other vampires just here to spook him.
37:52
And. Then and Vlad is a cat.
37:54
Yeah, and that's where Vlad turns into a cat and then Peter
37:56
doesn't fuck around. So two months later, we see that
37:59
Nick actually was turned into a vampire.
38:02
Yeah, they're you changed him. It's Deacon who's doing an
38:04
erotic dance for them and they're all really enjoying it.
38:07
And then Nick is trying really hard to, he still doesn't have
38:10
flying down. So he's trying to like get in
38:12
through the window by flying, but they have to help him then
38:16
just like pull him through the window.
38:17
I get it, if I found out I could fly I would be doing it all the
38:19
time. Yeah, I mastered it.
38:20
And they're really upset. They're like, hey, you're making
38:22
this super obvious that we're vampires here.
38:24
You're flying around outside like you can't be doing that.
38:27
Yeah, and basically he's saying like, like he just wants to be
38:29
accepted because how are you going to be friends with anybody
38:32
besides vampires at this point? Except for Stu, who hasn't
38:35
really figured out that he's a vampire yet.
38:37
And he's like saying all this stuff in front of Stu.
38:40
How does Stu and I hear this again?
38:41
I I missed it. Stu minds his own business.
38:44
That's how everybody likes Stu. He's talking about like Stu is
38:48
sitting, right, like in the same shot, but we also see the whole
38:52
process of becoming a vampire and it's basically like
38:55
withdrawals. Yeah, again, because he's
38:59
Twilight. He is Twilight.
39:01
That's how it works in Twilight is the it's a multi day process
39:05
and it burns as it's happening. Yeah.
39:08
Yeah, that's true. Deacon doesn't like Nick, but
39:12
there are some benefits to having a young vampire around
39:15
because he's like friends with the club owner.
39:17
Yeah. So we can get into the club.
39:19
Awesome. He's like showing them like
39:20
modern society and stuff like that, like technology.
39:22
He shows them the Internet. They watch this video of a
39:24
sunset for the first time. It's really funny.
39:27
They pass by a werewolf pack at one point, you know, and so they
39:31
have their whole beef with each other, and one of the werewolf
39:34
starts yelling and says a bad word.
39:38
And the alpha is like, what are we?
39:41
We're werewolves, not werewolves, which I I love that.
39:46
Yeah. Yeah, cuz like, I guess when
39:49
they get too heated they turn into werewolves I guess.
39:53
Cuz that's kind of our joke. Cuz you know, we do dialogue for
39:56
Talia around the house and Talia's dialogue never has swear
39:59
words in it. That's true.
40:00
You're right. It's always what the heck, guys?
40:04
Stu is there for this whole interaction, by the way, which
40:07
leads to Nick having a talk with him.
40:08
He's like you may have noticed some changes in me lately.
40:13
I I feel like this is like this is true to a documentary because
40:16
it's like hyping up like the whole like coming out moment to
40:19
like the close friend or whatever.
40:21
And Susie's OK with it, and the rest of the flat's mad that Stu
40:25
knows, but then he's also helping them learn technology.
40:28
Yeah. And Nick is like, yeah, I'm
40:30
starting to think they actually like Stu more than they like me.
40:33
And it's just like all these, like, videos, yeah, Stu, showing
40:36
them how to, like, do all this stuff.
40:37
And everybody just loves Stu. Stu's a great guy.
40:40
Oh, and he also is teaching them karate.
40:42
Oh yeah, I like that Viago does like the I can't remember the
40:47
character's name, but the Mortal Kombat kick.
40:50
Yeah, yeah. Viago, like Skype, calls his old
40:55
servant Philip, who is really old now, and he's so that you
40:59
put the wrong postage. A coffin.
41:01
Should I make it to Catherine on time?
41:03
And Phillip's like you were supposed to give me eternal
41:06
life. I'm 90 now.
41:09
And then, yeah, he's like a pain, yeah.
41:13
They're out again. It's another night out.
41:15
And Nick is telling everybody he's he's like, have you seen
41:18
Twilight? I'm in Twilight.
41:19
He's like, I'm the main guy, I'm in twilight.
41:20
I have Twilight. Yeah, and he's just showing off
41:24
in front of everybody. He sees this one guy.
41:26
He's like, yeah, I'm a vampire. He's like, Oh no shit, I'm a
41:28
vampire hunter and he's like, oh fuck you, I'll e-mail your mate
41:32
and then. And it sounds like a fun like
41:36
banter like if. That's like a good night.
41:38
Out at a bar and somebody like I could see us having this
41:41
conversation 10 years ago at Arcadium.
41:45
Yeah, exactly. Me too.
41:46
Yeah. Like I could see that happening.
41:48
Pisses Deacon off. Deacon's fed up with this, so
41:51
they get into a bat fight. Yes, the bat fight was really
41:55
intense. It was especially.
41:56
It's like at one point Deacon throws him as a bat against a
41:59
garage and he turns like when he hits the garage door.
42:03
It's violent. Yeah, I, you know, I, I thought
42:05
we were going to get Twilight rolls again where Nick would be
42:09
super strong, like the newborns. And that are, if you're like
42:13
newborn vampires in that movie is like really, really strong.
42:17
But he's defeated and he is really sad.
42:20
So they're like in a restaurant? And they're just off, yeah.
42:23
Yeah, they're, they're all eating together.
42:25
Stu's got like an order of fries and stuff and he's trying to.
42:28
Tries to turn them into worms and they're like, well, that
42:30
doesn't work if it doesn't already look like worms.
42:33
So I guess the the fries are too crispy.
42:35
Yeah. And Nick eats some and they're
42:39
like, I wouldn't do that. And he's like, yeah, why not?
42:41
They're just chips. And then it shows him outside
42:44
later and he's just throwing up. He's like, I can't even eat my
42:47
favorite food and I'm gonna say that's the moment I related to.
42:51
Yeah. That was that's me lately.
42:54
That moment was so funny cuz like it's like the musical build
42:57
up and it's just like a crescendo to him.
42:59
Just like vomiting. Like projectile vomiting blood
43:01
everywhere else. And like this is where he gets
43:04
like a talking head or whatever, where he's like, all of my
43:07
family and friends are going to die and I'm going to live
43:09
forever and I can't even eat my favorite snack.
43:11
I'm just. I'm don't believe the hype.
43:13
Yeah, vampires sucks. Don't want to be 1 anymore I.
43:16
Have to imagine there's a lot of growing things like this as a
43:19
vampire. See, that's the thing, like you
43:20
always watch the vampire media and you're like, I would like to
43:22
be a vampire, That's kind of cool.
43:24
But then the trade off stuff like this right here, Yeah.
43:28
I wouldn't miss fries anytime. Yeah.
43:31
I think Stu became the winner because he gets become a
43:34
werewolf and probably still gets to eat fries.
43:37
Yeah, that's yeah, I think Stu's got definitely an advantage
43:41
there. We see Peter is on fire.
43:46
Like we just cut to like there's a ruckus happening.
43:49
They open the basement door, Peter's on fire.
43:51
They're trying to get water and they didn't get to him in time
43:55
and they they figure out what happened.
44:01
The basement window has been shattered in and the person had
44:06
a stake so they were a vampire hunter and so clearly they were
44:09
in there to try and kill Peter Peter through the lid of the
44:11
coffin on them, but he got burnt by the fire.
44:14
And it's the guy that Nick told he was a vampire who responded.
44:19
And I'm a vampire hunter. Yeah.
44:22
And this is where they are. We're not there yet, but it's
44:26
gonna have major repercussions for Nick because it's the last
44:28
straw for Deacon. Yeah, but in the meantime, the
44:31
police have arrived because there's been a disturbance
44:33
reported by the neighbors. Yeah, between them fighting and
44:36
the break in, the break in, they're like, we need to look at
44:39
this. And this is where Fiago tries to
44:41
tries to hypnotize them and he says surely you won't see
44:44
anything I would afford. Yeah.
44:47
I like how the police are like what?
44:48
I'd hope not. I thought, like, it didn't work
44:51
on them there when they said that.
44:53
Yeah, like they're like they're. Fire.
44:56
Fire hazards. Because they're all going after
44:58
Nick right now. Because they're pissed that Nick
45:00
LED a vampire hunter to their. Home well, they're trying to
45:02
stop Deacon from basically murdering Nick in the moment, so
45:06
they're they're. Nick is flying in a corner.
45:08
Yeah, yeah. He's like levitating right now.
45:10
And they're all just like frozen in place in the kitchen and the
45:12
police are in there and they like, they don't see any of.
45:15
It Yeah. They're just more concerned
45:17
about no, no smoke detectors. No smoke detectors.
45:20
There's like chemicals right underneath of an electrical
45:23
outlet that it's just this house can go up in flames.
45:27
Anyway, I like like down there, they're like all right, like
45:30
maybe we should kill these guys, Like OK, maybe, but let's see
45:32
what else they like, what other safeties have to say, have for
45:34
us first, so. They have a trial for Nick and
45:39
they, they have multiple counts. You know, first and foremost is
45:43
that he's told outsiders that he's a vampire, but that got Stu
45:47
hanging out with them, so they were.
45:49
They're gonna let them with them, yeah.
45:50
He's copying Deacon style cuz he's wearing the same type of
45:53
jacket which I will say Nyx is a little bit more modern and has
45:57
very like Gerard Way in the Black Parade music video.
46:02
I don't know what that is. My Chemical Romance?
46:04
Yep. OK, I know what you're talking
46:06
about now. Yeah, I think his is a little
46:08
bit more modern style, but yeah, it's definitely, yeah,
46:11
definitely a RIP off of Deacons. And then there was also, you
46:16
know, the whole getting Peter killed.
46:18
Yeah, it was #2 like #2 telling people that he's a vampire.
46:21
Number one, you just brought. Somebody to the house.
46:23
Yeah. He's like that.
46:24
That that really should be the first and foremost, most
46:26
important one is that. And so he's banished from the
46:31
flat indefinitely and they have to do a procession of shame.
46:34
Yeah, a little bit extreme, but really all it is is they take
46:37
him to the backyard and they just circle around and point
46:39
like shame, shame. I think that's it, right?
46:42
Yeah, we do that with the pets and it seems to be pretty
46:44
effective. Yeah, and Stu's, they're
46:47
watching, and Nick's like, all right, Stu, I guess you're
46:50
coming with me. So there was Stu in this.
46:53
Several months later, they received the invite for the
46:56
Unholy Masquerade. Vlad has heard rumors that he
47:00
might be this year's special guest on a ring, but the invite
47:06
reveals that the beast is actually the.
47:09
Honoring. Yep.
47:10
So he goes and just storms off and rages in the other room.
47:14
Yeah, it's, it's not good. But the, the other fellows,
47:17
they're preparing for it and they're trying to find good
47:21
outfits. So Viago has this because it's a
47:23
masquerade, so you dress up for it.
47:25
And Viago has a habit of dressing as things that are
47:29
scary to vampires, which I argue is great.
47:31
I. Love that.
47:32
Yeah. For a scary costume.
47:35
Because he did Blade. He's doing Blade here.
47:38
Yeah, he's doing Blade here and he's like vampires, like Wesley
47:40
Snipes. Yeah.
47:41
He's. Like I mean some.
47:42
Vampire. Yeah, in previous years he did.
47:46
Whoopi, Goldberg and sister. Action.
47:48
Yeah. As a nun, yeah.
47:49
As a nun. So yeah, he, they're, they're
47:53
trying to figure out their outfits.
47:54
Vlad is refusing to go and he is aged horribly in this time.
47:58
He is grey. His eyebrows are massively grown
48:01
out. He hasn't been drinking blood.
48:03
He hasn't been drinking blood. They're like, listen, we'll stop
48:06
and we'll grab some and they along the way get a little, a
48:09
little life back in, Yeah. Yeah, so they arrive.
48:12
They're at the Masquerade now. Jackie has arrived and stuck up
48:16
on Deacon, and she's like, by the way, I'm a vampire.
48:19
Nick turned me. Yeah, well, cuz at first he's
48:21
like, you can't be here, this is for supernatural people only.
48:24
And she goes no, I'm, I'm a vampire, Nick turned me.
48:26
And like now Deacon's upset, which how long ago was she
48:29
turned? Like how much is Deacon really
48:31
paying attention to Jackie if he hasn't noticed in this time
48:34
have? To be a couple of months because
48:36
it took Nick a long time for him to like, finish out his
48:39
transformation. Yeah, so the honoree, her name
48:43
is Pauline the Beast is Nick's X, or not Nick's X, Vlad's X,
48:51
and she doesn't actually really like being called the Beast.
48:54
Yeah, I, I could imagine, yeah. Nick has brought Stuis's plus
48:58
one. I like, I just like, I like the
49:02
shot of them all dancing and then the camera pans over to
49:04
like the mirror and it's just like Nick, like going in circles
49:07
by himself and then like the zombies in the corner too.
49:10
Yeah, yeah, I like that. We got the zombies, the zombies
49:13
in there. We get a nice little like throw
49:15
away where he's like, yeah, no, like I'm trying to, you know,
49:18
get them to all the stuff doing the arm and the yeah thing.
49:21
Like we're multi dimensional beings.
49:22
Like that's such a stereotype. And then to, like, go over there
49:25
and go and they, like, extend their hand for like a handshake.
49:28
Yeah. Stu's starting to get a lot of
49:30
attention. Yeah, 'cause they can kind of
49:33
tell that he's got blood. He's warm when they touch him
49:35
too. Yeah, and the crowd is starting
49:37
to surround him, but Vlad appears and his best Gary
49:41
Oldman. How did he de age himself?
49:44
He must have ate somebody in his way over.
49:46
Just just like you suggested. He and Pauline have he and
49:51
Pauline's lover fight rather, and Stu impales the lover.
49:58
Yeah. And then they all leave.
50:01
Yeah, and this is where they're like doing the Stew chant as
50:03
they're like walking back to the house, but Stew.
50:07
Stew, Stew, Stew, Stew, Stew. Uh oh.
50:09
They encounter the werewolves. The wolves are getting ready for
50:16
for the full moon. You're going to.
50:18
This is. This reminded me of Buffy with
50:21
Oz. Yeah, where they're chaining
50:22
themselves up because it's a full moon.
50:24
Night. I also like them like they're
50:27
talking about. It's best to wear loose pants,
50:29
like your tight jeans. Those are going to be ruined.
50:31
That shirt ruined. You may be wearing loose pants
50:33
that you can transform into and then you'll still have pants
50:36
later. And it's funny because we had
50:39
seen earlier when they were starting to get into a fight, a
50:41
couple of them were starting to change, but then they breathed
50:43
through it back to normal. But this time it's the full
50:45
moon. There is not really a whole lot
50:48
that they can do. They don't get tied to the trees
50:50
in time because they're distracted by the vampires.
50:52
And then they start running after Stu and the cameraman, one
50:57
of the cameramen gets killed. And we see the police later in
51:03
an ambulance and they're like picking up pieces of people and
51:05
they're like, this guy's in bad shape.
51:07
Yeah, so they the vampire has got away and Nick is feeling
51:12
really bad because Stu's dead. And Deacon actually has like, a
51:16
moment with him. This is their big makeup moment.
51:17
He's like, listen, like, I think it's the first time it really
51:20
hit Deacon that Nick is a new vampire.
51:24
He's like, you're going to see everybody you love.
51:27
This is part of being a vampire. This is part of it and so.
51:30
Everybody you love will die. Yeah.
51:32
Just got it. Yeah.
51:33
Which is probably about as good a pep talk as you're gonna get
51:37
from Deacon. Yeah, You know, they had a nice
51:39
moment here. Yeah, it was.
51:40
It was a sweet moment. But we cut to a black screen and
51:45
we hear a voicemail from Nick saying that he's coming over and
51:49
he's got kind of a big surprise. And they just, they all just.
51:52
Have to see it blow your mind. Yeah.
51:54
So knock on the door. Open the door.
51:56
It's Nick with Stew. Stew, he's all scratched up,
52:00
he's got all kinds of scars on his face and they're like, yeah,
52:04
he actually didn't die. He was turned into a werewolf.
52:08
The whole rest of the pack's with them and like the vampires
52:11
are very uncomfortable with the pack comes in and they all just
52:15
start becoming friends. Stu is the perfect bridge right
52:18
here. Yeah, I wonder, like if we got a
52:21
sequel, if that would mean that the werewolves would get invited
52:23
to the Unholy Masquerade because they weren't invited to the.
52:25
Masquerade. I thought, you know, that's a
52:27
little shitty. Yeah.
52:28
The fact that they would be excluded.
52:30
Yeah. Stu Stu would unite all.
52:33
Stu almost united them there. Stu brings World Peace.
52:37
He really does, dude. Stu is what we need.
52:40
Stu is a mystery Congeniality. He is 100% and we just, it just
52:46
ends with him. Like we, we've not really talked
52:49
about this, but throughout the whole movie we've also seen
52:51
snippets of Viago, like staring outside Catherine's apartment
52:55
because he's just kind of like longs for her.
52:57
We find out now he said fuck it and he went to go say hi to her
53:02
and he he converted her into a vampire.
53:05
Yeah, so. Vlad and the Beast are back
53:10
together but they're realizing that it's they're they're hit
53:14
the point why to where they realize why they split up in the
53:17
1st place. It's just them, like having loud
53:19
sex and fighting. Yeah, yeah, it's a toxic kind of
53:22
relationship. And the werewolves, We just go
53:26
with this little snippet of the werewolves and how they
53:28
function. Yeah, we're seeing that.
53:30
Yeah, we've got like an alpha and they all have to listen to
53:32
him. And they have to laugh when he
53:33
laughs and stuff like that. And you're like quizzes them
53:35
like why they laugh like I I don't know.
53:38
Why I'd like to see werewolves because I want to know a little
53:41
bit more about their structure. Because I'm sure we get.
53:44
I want to know more Werewolf or maybe we would get some other
53:48
movies like Silver Bullet spoofed in there or there's.
53:53
Any number of werewolf movies to pull from.
53:56
Yeah, same with vampires. So I I would love to see that
53:59
too. I'd like, I'd like a lady
54:01
werewolf and like we get a little ginger snaps moment.
54:05
Ginger snaps would be a great one to cover too.
54:07
Yeah, yeah. And then at the very, very end
54:10
of the credits, we get a symbol of Deacon who's like, you will
54:14
forget everything that you've seen in this movie.
54:16
Which I like that as the end of the documentary, but it only
54:20
works if you're somebody that stays until the end of the
54:21
credits. True.
54:22
Yeah, And that's how the movie goes.
54:25
That's how it goes. I think it's still a nine.
54:27
Yeah, I'm keeping mine at a nine also.
54:29
It's just a fun movie. Like I said, I'd like a little
54:31
bit more closure with Jackie, but I I like the story we got.
54:41
Yeah, I do too. Yeah.
54:42
There's not much I would really change about this.
54:44
It just. Yeah, it is what it is here.
54:48
All right, So Talia, what did Talia think of?
54:53
This she was watching some of it and then she was asleep.
54:56
I think that she would have some problems with us because of a a
55:00
werewolf attack. And was getting pinned on the
55:03
dog. Yeah, yeah, because they they
55:06
found a dog and they were like, well, clearly this dog is the
55:08
one who. It's the sweetest dog too.
55:10
It was so nice. It's being taken to a shelter.
55:14
It's just. It's OK.
55:15
I think that. I think my head cannon is that
55:17
it got away when Stu attacked. Stu saved the dog.
55:21
I think Tolly's going to give this A7, OK.
55:24
I think she's also a little bit offended that the werewolves
55:26
wouldn't get invited to the masquerade.
55:27
Oh. Absolutely, because Can you
55:29
imagine if I had a masquerade? She would be the she would be
55:31
the Stew at the party. Zoe's ultimate warrior.
55:34
Ultimate Warrior. I think Deacon.
55:39
I was going to say Nick. Nick, OK.
55:42
Because she's definitely eating stuff she's not supposed to and
55:45
throwing up blood. You're so right, that happened
55:48
last. Year also, she goes around
55:51
telling everybody she's a cat. Definitely does.
55:54
Yeah, you can't, guys. So she's just.
55:56
She's totally Nick. All right, does Courtney think
55:58
this is a hoot or a holler? I.
56:01
Think she wasn't super into it. I think this is a this is a
56:05
humor she's not mature enough for yet.
56:07
That's true. It all went over her head.
56:09
She's like, I don't get it guys. So they're vampires, so on.
56:12
So this is a holler. OK, who'd you roll it to?
56:15
Nick throwing up after eating food he likes?
56:17
Yeah. I related to Vlad trying to talk
56:20
to Talia and Talia just completely ignoring me.
56:24
Like I literally have to in the backyard walk over to Talia and
56:28
that's when she starts to listen to me.
56:31
Like I'll be like, I will pick you up and carry you in here if
56:33
you don't listen to me right now.
56:35
And that's the only time she does that.
56:36
He is. I've had to pick her up a couple
56:38
of times. She needs it.
56:40
Yeah. Dream Sequel.
56:42
Dream. Sequel.
56:43
I mean, I want we're wolves. Yeah, of course.
56:45
Yeah, I mean, what would we want from it?
56:48
Yeah, that's a good question. I, I, I mean, I think we kind of
56:51
already talked about that too, Like the movies that we would
56:53
want to see spoofed, we would want to see Silver bullet,
56:55
Ginger saps howling. Do we get Gary Busey?
57:01
Jake Busey. Jake Busey?
57:03
Yeah. I don't think you want to get
57:04
Gary Busey these days, unfortunately.
57:08
What would Dom do? What would Dom do?
57:10
Well, Dom, he wouldn't have banished Nick.
57:13
He would have made sure that like.
57:16
No, he Dom did that in the first movie with the fucking guy that
57:20
kept Jack. He banished him from the house.
57:25
That's true. That's true.
57:26
Especially if it was his fault that Peter died and.
57:29
He may have said indefinitely also, and they may have also had
57:32
a discussion of if that means forever, if that means any day
57:36
now. Because he will let them back in
57:38
eventually. OK, so then does Dom just behave
57:41
exactly as they do in this movie?
57:44
It would play out exactly the same it would.
57:45
Play out exactly the same, except they'd be driving instead
57:48
of in a bus. Exactly.
57:49
Dom is Peter. Yeah, that's I agree with all of
57:54
that. Yeah.
57:54
OK. All right.
57:56
So it's time for us to do tagline.
57:58
Yep. And then once we do that, we can
58:01
get to our reviews. OK, what was the some interviews
58:04
with some vampires? Yeah.
58:05
OK, I'm trying. To think of something like a
58:08
vampire movie pun. High stakes.
58:12
No, yeah, I don't know. It's it needs something else.
58:15
Yeah, I'm just thinking of the poker fart.
58:23
This is hard. It really is, because that was
58:26
such a good one. I don't know if this is too and
58:30
like if I'm too in my own head with it, but kind of going back
58:34
to the to the Interview with the vampire of it all.
58:39
The first book in that series is actually called the Vampire
58:42
Lestat. So what if the titling was the
58:45
vampire tells all? Oh, OK.
58:48
So kind of boy. That's kind of what they're
58:51
doing in this right here. They're telling all, yeah, OK, I
58:53
like it. That works.
58:54
Yeah. I just don't know if that like
58:56
we'll track without hearing the explanation.
58:59
Well, you better listen to the episode then.
59:01
Oh boy. And if you're at this point,
59:02
then congratulations, you got the you got the the reference
59:06
there. All right, that's it.
59:08
Because I'm not thinking of anything else only.
59:09
Reason somebody listened to this episode.
59:11
Surely I do not. Understand the tagline.
59:14
Yeah, I got to get the meaning of this here.
59:17
All right. OK, cool.
59:18
We got it. All right, Let's do a review.
59:21
OK, so I got a 2 out of 10. It's on IMDb around the time a
59:25
movie came out in 2014. A polarizing movie to me.
59:28
Just awful. I think this is a movie people
59:31
will either absolutely love or absolutely hate.
59:33
To me, unfortunately, it was the latter.
59:35
The concept seems to be a day in the life of a few suburban
59:38
vampires in Wellington, New Zealand.
59:40
It's kind of fun to see places I know on the movie screen, but
59:43
that wore off pretty quickly. It's shot in the style of a bad
59:47
B grade movie, which is really what it is.
59:49
Maybe it's C grade. The camera work probably came
59:52
out just how they wanted it, in the style of one of the why on
59:55
top of the camera. Visually, it's not a great
59:58
movie. The movie lacks a number of
1:00:00
things, a plot, interesting characters, and interesting
1:00:03
things happening. It was the worst movie you've
1:00:05
seen in this decade. If you love vampire movies, love
1:00:08
bad B grade movies, and you know Wellington, you might enjoy this
1:00:11
film. Others should approach with
1:00:12
caution. I do love vampires and be great
1:00:16
movies. I do too, so I don't know, maybe
1:00:18
there's well, maybe we are the. Audience for this, maybe?
1:00:22
Yeah, I mean, we kind of talked about some of that before
1:00:25
though. Like, yeah, the movie doesn't
1:00:26
really seem to have much of A plot, but I think that that
1:00:28
sticks true to like the documentary nature of what the.
1:00:32
Movie is. Yeah, I mean, it's supposed to
1:00:34
just be a day in the life of a vampire.
1:00:37
And that's exactly what we get here.
1:00:38
And we even get like, you know, the process of like the new
1:00:40
vampire and we get a little bit of a story there, you know, like
1:00:44
people have their individual stories, like you said, the
1:00:46
narratives that they find through all the footage that
1:00:48
they get. It felt very authentic to me.
1:00:51
It worked for me. I agree.
1:00:53
Yeah, we don't have any listener reviews, so if you guys haven't
1:00:57
seen this yet, we absolutely recommend you check it out
1:01:00
because we love this movie. It's a lot of fun.
1:01:03
So that doesn't for this or this weeks episode.
1:01:07
All right, so. This week, and we'll have to be
1:01:09
or not to be, like we said before.
1:01:11
And next week we will have cooties.
1:01:13
Yeah, which is a 2014 zombie esque movie.
1:01:19
You can watch that on TV, Pluto, Plex prime, YouTube, YouTube TV,
1:01:26
where you can rent it from Google TV, Apple TV or Fandango
1:01:29
at home. So there's a lot of free
1:01:31
options, so watch it if you haven't.
1:01:33
It's starring Elijah Wood, Rainn Wilson, Wee.
1:01:37
Winnell's in it. Yeah, Lee Winnell's in it, which
1:01:41
God, I just. OK, listen, if you've got Saul
1:01:46
Blu-ray, watch the director's commentary with James Wan, Lee
1:01:51
Whannell and Carrie Ellis, because it is the funniest
1:01:54
fucking commentary I've ever listed.
1:01:56
Dude those three have such good banter together it was
1:02:00
hilarious. It was so good.
1:02:02
Like if you ever worried about Carrie Ellis hating Saul, he
1:02:07
doesn't hate like those two. Guys, yeah, he doesn't.
1:02:10
He might hate the property. Yeah, they they were really good
1:02:13
friends, so it's really funny hearing them all talk.
1:02:15
It was such a good time. Yeah, and I was actually really
1:02:18
excited to hear him, like shit talk the whole thing, but not he
1:02:21
was. He spoke very highly of it the
1:02:22
entire time. Yeah.
1:02:23
But yeah, OK, cool. Yeah, so Cooties, next week
1:02:28
that's gonna be, it's much like this.
1:02:30
Maybe it's only gonna be your second time watching it.
1:02:32
Yeah, yeah, since that came out, yeah.
1:02:34
So be on the lookout for that. In the meantime, you can find us
1:02:37
on our social media. We have Instagram and threads at
1:02:41
least favorite scary movie podcast blue sky, at least
1:02:43
favepod. We have a Gmail if you'd like to
1:02:46
e-mail us least favorite scarymovie@gmail.com and our
1:02:49
website is what's your least favorite scary movie.com.
1:02:52
We want to give a shout out to our bubbies on the Patreon.
1:02:54
We have Joe, as is his full name, Amber, Michael, Tyler,
1:02:59
Chad, Johnny, Jason and Lord Zombie.
1:03:03
Thank you guys for. Doing Zombie, did you get your
1:03:04
invite to the Unholy Masquerade? Oh yeah, he, he, he's Shook
1:03:11
Shook. I was trying to think of like
1:03:13
the past tense of Shook Shook and he, he does not have the
1:03:18
poor perception of the zombies that the guy was afraid of in
1:03:21
the movie. He's a high Class 1, but we want
1:03:25
to thank you guys for being our supporters and patrons.
1:03:28
It means a lot to us and yeah, you guys are awesome.
1:03:31
So thanks for sticking around with us.
1:03:34
That does it for this week. So I think we're going to sign
1:03:38
off now until. Next time.
1:03:39
Bye. I thought that this was cool.
1:03:55
Oh shit, right now that Travis is done ruining the rug in this
1:04:02
room. It's all good now.